


Without Words

by InADifferentLife



Category: Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Avengers Tower, Bucky Barnes & Steve Rogers Friendship, Bucky Barnes & Tony Stark Friendship, Bucky Barnes Feels, Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Bucky Barnes Recovering, Bucky Barnes-centric, Bucky Barnes/Tony Stark - Freeform, Canon Compliant, Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Depression, Domestic Avengers, Domestic Fluff, Eventual Romance, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Hallucinations, Howard Stark's A+ Parenting, M/M, Marvel Cinematic Universe - Freeform, Not Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Other, Parent Tony Stark, Post-Thor: Ragnarok (2017), Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Precious Peter Parker, Protective Bucky Barnes, Protective Steve Rogers, Protective Tony Stark, Slow Burn, Slow Romance, Suicidal Thoughts, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Tony Stark-centric, Veeeery slow burn, mcu - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-02
Updated: 2019-08-01
Packaged: 2019-08-14 13:22:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 47
Words: 183,836
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16493378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InADifferentLife/pseuds/InADifferentLife
Summary: Life for Tony Stark has changed a lot in the past four months: the rogue Avengers were pardoned and have moved back into the tower with him; Thor returned to earth with his infamous brother, Bruce Banner, and all of Asgard after their planet was destroyed; and summer vacation recently started—which means Tony worries almost constantly about his little spider protégé who can never seem to stay out of trouble.Life has also changed a lot for James “Bucky” Barnes since he was thawed out for what he hopes to be the last time in his life. Princess Shuri of Wakanda finally managed to erase all of the verbal triggers Hydra used to control his brain, and she also gifted him a new arm made of Vibranium. Bucky is now trying to catch up on everything he missed during the past 70 years.As Bucky returns to America, he finds himself moving into the home of the one person who terrifies him the most—Tony Stark. Little does he know, Tony is just as frightened of living with the man formerly known as the Winter Soldier. However, as time goes by, the two men slowly come to realize that getting to know one another might actually be a blessing in disguise.*New chapter guaranteed at least once per week





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello, Everyone! This is going to be a veeeery slow burn fic which will eventually focus mainly on the romance of James "Bucky" Barnes and Tony Stark. Even though it will take several chapters before we even see the two interact with one another, I promise it will be worth it in the end. Plus, you'll get a lot of other great character interactions along the way. I try to make every scene as necessary/entertaining as possible; not a fan of filler content. That being said, it has been seven years since I've written any fanfiction, and it's my first time writing Marvel fanfiction. I have a pretty clear idea of where this story is going, but if you have any constructive criticism or suggestions of something you'd like me to try to work into the story, I'd love to hear what you think! 
> 
> My goal is to update every Thursday, but if I'm in a writing mood, you may get more than one chapter a week. :) I hope you enjoy it!

Tony tiredly rubbed his eyes before reaching out to grab his nearby mug, moving it to his lips to take a sip. His nose scrunched up in disgust as he swallowed the room temperature coffee. “How long has it been since I made this?” he muttered to himself, though his AI did not hesitate to answer him. “It has been just over two hours since you made that coffee, boss.”

 _Two hours?_ “Fri, what’s the time?” he asked as he squeezed the bridge of his nose.

“It’s 4:38 in the morning. Would you like me to turn off the lights as you make your way to bed?” Friday suggested, the lights in Tony’s lab already beginning to dim.

“Uh huh, nice try, Friday. You’ve been spending too much time talking to Pepper and Rhodey. Lights up.” The lights immediately returned to full brightness, causing Tony to squint a bit, and Friday made a slight huffing sound that Tony is positive she learned from Pepper. He rolled his eyes and turned back to his work, pen in his mouth as his eyes carefully scanned the formulas on the paper in front of him. He adjusted a few things here and there, stopping after each adjustment to chew on his pen a bit more. He continued to work until he was interrupted by Friday once more.

“Boss, Captain Rogers is trying to access the lab.”

With a groan, he set down his work before running a hand through his rather unruly hair. “Is there a problem? I thought Cap had the decency to sleep until at least 5:30 before his morning workout.” The agitation in his voice was unmistakable.

“It’s nearly six o’clock. I believe he came down here because he’s worried about you.” Great. Just what he needed. Captain America to scold him for staying up past his bedtime. He stood up with a grunt and took a minute to stretch before heading to the entrance of his lab. “I’m going to bed.” He announced, the lights immediately turning off and the door opening to reveal a concerned looking Steve Rogers dressed in black workout apparel.

“Tony, I saw the lights on in your lab when I was getting ready to head down to the gym. Have you been up all night?” Though Steve really didn’t need to ask as he could tell from the mussed hair, hunched shoulders, and dark circles that the other man had not properly slept in quite a while.

“Just working on some stuff. Headed up to bed now.” He said as he brushed past the super soldier. Steve frowned a bit as Tony began to walk towards the elevator before calling out to him.

“Hey, I was planning on making omelets for breakfast, so don’t sleep too late, all right?” Tony sighed and looked back at the man as he stepped onto the elevator. It was really hard to stay annoyed with Steve when he bribed Tony with the ambrosia that were his omelets. Tony knew it was one of many daily attempts by Steve to repair their friendship as quickly as possible, but he also knew there was nowhere else in the state of New York that he could get an omelet as good as the ones that Steve made, so he nodded and offered the Captain a tired smile.

“I’ll try not to.” Tony said as the doors of the elevator closed. Once the elevator was moving, he leaned back against the wall, arms crossed over his chest, and sighed deeply. It had only been three months since the rogue Avengers were pardoned and had returned to the tower. In the two years that they were gone, Tony had secretly never stopped hoping they would be reunited one day. He had continued to develop new weapons and technology for his outlaw teammates during the entirety of their separation, constantly updating his creations so that he would always be ready for their return. Though he was angry, hurt, and still had panic attacks about the incident in Siberia, the Avengers had been a family to him, As a man who hardly even had that when his own family was alive, he found himself secretly longing for that once again. That desire of camaraderie which he so longed for, may or may not have been the reason that he worked so diligently for two years to develop clever and exciting gadgets for his former teammates. Even if they hadn’t missed him, he was sure that they missed the toys. After all, nobody else could provide them with the things he could give them, right?

The elevator gave a soft ding as the doors opened and Tony stepped out onto his floor. He froze in surprise when he heard hushed voices; until he realized that the TV was on. He chuckled softly as he walked further into the living room and saw a certain curly-haired teenager passed out on the couch, a bag of Doritos under his arm. The genius picked up the remote and turned off the TV before leaning over to take the chip bag from under Peter’s arm and set it on the coffee table. Peter whined, and Tony rolled his eyes as he laughed softly, which caused Peter to sleepily crack open an eye to peek at the older man.

“Mis’er Stark?” the teenager asked sleepily.

“Yeah, it’s me kid. Come on, why don’t you go to your bed?” He suggested in a soft voice as he sat beside the boy and pushed a few curls out of Peter’s face. Peter practically nuzzled into the touch, but made a soft noise of protest at Tony’s suggestion.

“Bed’s too far. ‘m comfy here.” Tony chuckled and shook his head while looking down at Peter. He honestly wondered if all teenagers were this cute, or if just his teenager was this cute. During the past two years, he and Peter had grown extremely close. At first, Tony had kept a nice, safe distance from the kid, absolutely terrified of ruining the boy’s sweet disposition the moment he found out that Peter idolized him. However, as time went on, Tony realized that being a stand-offish mentor was really no better than being like his own father, which is what he had been trying to avoid at all costs. Tony had invited Peter to come hang out in his lab with him once a week after school; that soon turned into a couple nights a week, which soon turned into Peter spending weekends with Tony. When Tony realized that summer vacation was going to start in a month, he had nervously—though he’d never admit that—called May and asked for her permission to invite Peter to stay with him for the summer. To his pleasant surprise, she had agreed; on the condition that he wouldn’t hog her nephew all summer, which seemed more than fair to Tony. He never thought he would be a father figure to anyone, but he certainly was glad that he had overcome his fear of turning into Howard. Blood or not, Peter was basically his son, and he would be the first to admit that the kid was one of the best things that had ever happened to him.

“Does May let you get away with this?” He asked softly as he maneuvered a pillow under the boy’s head before pulling a blanket from the back of the couch, covering him gently. Tony smiled as he realized the boy was fast asleep again, and he stood back up, following the light from the rising sun to his own room. He quickly pulled off his jeans, and climbed into bed without even bothering to brush his teeth or change into pajamas.

Tony managed to get a little more than four hours of sleep before Friday woke him up to alert him that he was receiving a call from Pepper. “Put her on, Fri.” he said with a yawn as he sat up and rubbed the back of his neck. “Pepper, light of my life, what are you up to on this lovely morning?” He asked, voice still thick with sleep.

“I’m in my car on the way to the quarterly Stark Industries board meeting that begins in half an hour. One of the few meetings I ask you to join us for, Tony. Can I assume that you’re also on your way?” She asked sweetly, though Tony could imagine her eyes narrowing as she pointedly crossed her arms and waited for an answer.

“It’s a funny story actually…”

“Tony...”

“…see I was definitely planning on coming to that meeting…”

“Tony.”

“…and I definitely remembered that there was a meeting this time…”

“TONY!”

He clamped his mouth shut as he heard Pepper groan on the other end of the line. “Save it, Tony. You never remember, I know that by now. This is a courtesy call. Meeting starts in half an hour.”

“Pep, there’s no way I can get ready and make it there in time…” he began, but she cut him off again.

“The meeting starts promptly at nine. I’m going to call your home office at 8:59, and you had better be ready, Tony, or I swear…”

“A wonderful idea as usual! Don’t worry, you can count on me.” Tony could practically hear her eyes roll as she sighed in exasperation.

“It’s going to be a video call, so make sure you look presentable. Don’t forget that you’re the face of the company.”

“So what I’m hearing is that you just want something pretty to look at during that long, boring meeting? I’m hurt, Pepper. I’m more than just a pretty face.” He teased, his grin growing wider as he heard Pepper laugh softly.

“Just be ready when I call.” Pepper warned before hanging up. He flopped back against the obscene amount of pillows on his bed and mused about how board meetings were very aptly named, as they just about bored him to death every time he was forced to sit through one. At least he was allowed to attend via video call for this meeting. He suddenly wondered if he had enough time to set up a video loop of him pretending to pay attention so that he could just skip the meeting altogether, but he quickly nixed that idea when he realized that if someone addressed him and he didn’t respond, it would take his quick-witted CEO all of two seconds to realize what was going on; he did not feel like being murdered today. With a sigh, the billionaire forced himself out of bed, throwing on a pair of jeans and a white button down before completing the look with a tie that he planned to remove promptly after his meeting ended. Tony ran a comb through his hair before heading out of the room and down the hall to make a pot of coffee before the meeting, surprised to hear soft voices coming from his kitchen. He turned the corner, smiling when he saw Peter’s terrible case of bed head, though the smile quickly disappeared when he noticed the mischievous god sitting next to Peter.

It had been two months since Thor returned to earth with his brother, Bruce Banner, and all of the Asgardians who had managed to escape the destruction of their planet unharmed. The entire world was shocked to learn of the legendary Asgard’s demise, but Earth loved the newly-crowned King, who had always worked tirelessly to protect them from harm, and many countries worldwide began to offer up areas of land for the Asgardians to use as their new home. No one was surprised that the God of Thunder had graciously accepted land from Norway, and Thor and his people quickly set off to begin building their new home. Loki, however, was still feared by most of the world, and while Thor had assured everyone that Loki had changed, many wondered if Thor was just seeing what he wanted to see. After all, it was obvious to everyone (except perhaps Loki) that he loved his younger brother very much. After much deliberation, it had been determined that Loki was to live with the recently reunited Avengers, who were tasked with the job of keeping an eye on him until he proved himself trustworthy to the rest of the planet. Tony still wondered how he had let himself get talked into being a babysitter for the god, and if he didn’t have such a soft spot for Thor, he was sure he would have kicked his annoying younger brother out weeks ago. It didn’t help that Loki and Peter had taken an instant liking to one another—if he were to try and kick Loki out now, he’d have two sets of killer puppy dog eyes to deal with, and that was just not a battle he wanted to face.

“Mr. Stark! Mr. Loki just changed the color of my shirt! Remember? Last night it was red!” Peter babbled excitedly as he tugged at his now dark green shirt. A smug smirk twitched at the corner of Loki’s lips as he reached up to run his fingers through Peter’s messy curls, a faint glimmer of green emanating from his fingertips as Peter’s hair was suddenly perfectly coiffed.

“I say, Stark. Peter looks quite dashing in green, does he not? I think it might suit him even more than red does.” Peter preened at the compliment from the god while Tony feigned indifference, knowing full well that Loki was trying to get a rise out of him.

“You know, Reindeer Games, you’re right. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone pull off that **_exact_** shade of green as well as Pete. Some fair-skinned individuals look positively peaked when they wear green.” Now it was Tony’s turn to smirk as irritation was clearly written all over Loki’s face, who turned his attention back to the cup of tea he was nursing just as Steve walked out of the pantry with an armful of ingredients.

“Tony, you’re up earlier than I expected. I was about to make breakfast for Peter, but I’ll go ahead and make breakfast for you too.” Tony side-eyed his kid, who was now chattering excitedly to Loki about a new amusement park that would be opening later in the summer, and Tony wondered just how Peter had managed to wrap every adult in the tower so tightly around his pinky.

“Thanks, Cap, but Pepper called to remind me that I have a meeting to be present at in...” He trailed off briefly as he glanced at his watch, “About ten minutes, so I’ll have to make a pot of coffee and be on my way.” Peter looked over suddenly, face filled with disappointment, though he quickly turned back to Loki and continued speaking about the amusement park, albeit in a much less excited tone. Tony had promised to take Peter go-karting, and the boy had clearly thought his mentor had forgotten about their plans. Tony walked over and gave the boy’s shoulder a squeeze. “Hey Underoos, I totally forgot about a stupid board meeting today. Actually, come to think of it, I’m not sure I even knew about it. You know, sometimes I think Pepper likes to spring things on me last second so I don’t have time to think of an excuse.” He said with a chuckle. “The meeting should be over by lunch time. Are we still on for go-karts, or did you forget about your old man and make plans with someone else?” Peter’s face lit up and he quickly shook his head.

“No, Mr. Stark! I didn’t forget at all! After lunch sounds great!” Tony grinned as he ruffled the boy’s hair, completely ignoring Loki’s amusement at their interaction.

“Good!” Tony exclaimed with a clap of his hands before turning to start the coffee, only to see that Steve already had a pot brewing.

“Tony, you really should eat something. You can’t survive on just coffee.” Tony smirked as he leaned against a counter, crossing his arms over his chest.

“You’re right, Cap. And that’s what alcohol is for.” Steve just glared at him, and Tony normally would have reveled in the amount of annoyance he had managed to bring out in the man’s features, but he heard a loud huff from behind him and turned to see that Peter was also glaring at him. Oops. Sometimes he still forgot that he was actually someone’s role model.

“Mr. Stark, Aunt May says that breakfast is the most important meal of the day. If you don’t eat, it will affect the outcome of your whole day!’

“All right, Kid. You got me. May’s right, but I need to be in my office in just a few minutes. I don’t have time for food now.” He said as he quickly poured himself a scalding cup of coffee, turning back just in time to catch a smirk settling onto Loki’s lips, though the god never looked up from his book.

“Cheer up, little one. It wouldn’t hurt Stark to skip a few meals.” Tony rolled his eyes as he headed to his office, smiling to himself as he heard both Peter and Steve berate Loki for the snide remark. Once the door to his office was closed, he trudged to his chair and plopped down, taking a sip of coffee just as Friday alerted him to Pepper’s call. Tony had Friday answer immediately, and Pepper looked relieved to see a presentable Tony on her screen in the conference room. A few moments later Pepper started the meeting, and within five minutes, the billionaire was already bored out of his mind. He tried to pay attention, though he doubted anyone would even address him pertaining to anything of importance. The board members had all known for years that Tony pretty much hated the business side of things, and though they were all outraged when he first signed Stark Industries over to Pepper, it did not take anyone on the board long to realize that Pepper Potts was the perfect choice to run the company. Not only was she level-headed enough to handle all of the problems and complexities that plagued Stark Industries, but she was also the only person in the entire corporation who could actually make Tony Stark sit down and shut up for a while.

Tony glanced down at his watch and had to bite his lip to keep from groaning aloud. Thirty-seven minutes? Was that really all the time that had passed since the beginning of the meeting? He stared down into his now-empty mug, deciding that his next invention definitely needed to be a mug of coffee that never ran out. Several more minutes passed of the man’s fidgeting, before he saw the door to his office slowly open and Peter peek in at Tony as if to ask permission to enter. When Tony looked at him curiously, the teenager stepped fully into the office, walking over and silently holding up the pot of coffee he brought to refill his mentor’s mug. Tony could have kissed the boy. As Peter poured the hot coffee into his mug, the billionaire picked up a notepad, looking to anyone in the meeting as if he were actually paying attention, though he just scrawled out “MY HERO <3” and flipped the pad to show Peter, whose eyes widened the moment he accidentally giggled aloud. Tony grinned for a split second before coughing to cover up the sound of Peter’s laugh, not missing the suspicious glance Pepper threw to the camera as he took a sip of his coffee. Peter turned to go, but Tony gave him a pleading look and scratched a few more words out onto his notepad.

 _So bored. I might die._ Peter set the pot of coffee down and quietly sat in a chair on the other side of Tony’s desk, grinning as he picked up a pen.

_Aren’t you the boss? Why do you have to sit here?_

_Wrong. Pepper’s the boss. She says I have to sit here._

_Are you scared of Miss Potts?_

_Without a doubt._ Peter covered his mouth to keep from laughing again. Tony tried not to look too amused.

_I love her. She reminds me of May._

_May is scary too._ Peter bit his lip hard, laughing silently as he wrote a response.

_Think that’s why they became good friends so quickly?_

_They either bonded over their love for you or their love of scaring me. Not sure which one._ A smile tugged at the corner of Tony’s lips as Peter’s entire body shook with the laughter he was trying to contain. The boy took a moment to calm down, his eyes focusing on the screen for the first time as he watched an expressionless man in a dark blue suit drone on about numbers in the most monotone voice imaginable. Peter picked up his pen and scratched something else onto the pad, pushing it back to the older man.

 _Wow, I didn’t know Ben Stein worked for you._ Tony actually choked on his coffee and ended up spitting some of it onto his desk as he tried desperately not to laugh. The boring man had stopped speaking and everyone in the meeting had turned their attention to the screen. Pepper did not look happy.

“Sorry folks, coffee went down the wrong pipe.” He cleared his throat for added effect before waving his hand. “Please, carry on.” The man continued his spiel and Tony grabbed a pen.

 _You’ll be the death of me, Kid._ Peter grinned when he read it and decided immediately that he just had to try and make the older man laugh. Tony watched curiously as the teenager stood up and started slowly dancing in the middle of the room. It took mere seconds for him to realize what Peter was trying to do, and though he kept a straight face, his eyes were filled with amusement. He watched as Peter started Flossing before he moved into the Macarena and then the Robot. The boy must have decided he wasn’t getting the reaction that he wanted, because he suddenly walked straight up the wall and onto the ceiling. Tony was so enthralled in his protégé’s performance, that he completely missed the forty-five seconds that Pepper was staring at her lap, typing furiously on her phone. Peter began to do a soft shoe on the ceiling and Tony accidentally let loose a soft giggle, which only encouraged Peter to continue his upside down tap dancing until the boy felt his phone vibrate. He pulled it out of his pocket to check it as he danced, assuming it was Ned, but he suddenly stopped dancing and scurried down from the ceiling with widened eyes, bringing the phone over for Tony to read. The message wasn’t from Ned; it was from Pepper.

 _Sweetheart, I don’t know what you’re doing in the office with Tony right now…but if you two don’t start behaving, I will come over there and ground both of you the moment this meeting is over._ Tony and Peter shared a look that was more frightened than surprised, and Tony stole a glance at the screen to see his CEO staring straight into the camera with one eyebrow raised slightly. Peter grabbed the pen one more time.

 _You’re right. Scary._ He wrote before hurrying from the office with a little wave, and Tony turned his attention back to the meeting, wishing desperately that he knew a way to accelerate time.  


	2. Chapter 2

After the meeting finally ended over an hour and a half later, Tony quickly traded his collared shirt and tie for a graphic tee and blazer before he and Peter went out to enjoy the rest of their day together. The two spent hours at the go-kart track and then headed out for pizza and ice cream. It wasn’t until late evening before the two headed back to the Avengers tower, and for once, even Tony was ready to turn in early. Somehow, Peter still had energy after their long day, and he bounded into the open elevator as the two left the garage.

“Hi, Friday!” He said with a big grin as Tony leisurely made his way towards the elevator.

“Hello, Peter. You look like you had fun.” The boy voiced his agreement as Tony casually stepped onto the elevator, checking his phone for the first time in a few hours. He had a few missed calls from Steve and one from Natasha; that did not sit well with him. He knew that Friday would have alerted him if there was an attack that required Iron Man’s presence. He also knew that Steve and Natasha were aware of his plans with Peter. Neither of them was the type to call him up if it weren’t important. He clenched his teeth as he felt his stomach begin to jitter, though you’d never know he was feeling anxious just by looking at him.

“Friday, do you know why I have missed calls from Cap and Natasha?” He asked. If they had called him while in the tower, she’d know.

“About that…Captain Rogers actually told me that he needed to speak with you. It’s very important. He’s been waiting in the lounge for you to return. Shall I take you straight to the common area?” He did not like that answer.

“Yeah, sure. Stop it there for me and then keep the elevator going straight up to my floor so Peter can go get ready for bed.” The whine that followed from Peter didn’t come as a surprise to him.

“Mr. Stark! I’m not even that tired. It’s only 10:30 _and it’s summertime._ I want to know what’s going on! I’ll be suuuuper quiet. I swear. Pleeease?” Somehow, Tony doubted very much that Peter would be quiet, but he sighed as he looked into the boy’s pleading puppy dog eyes, knowing that he had already lost.

“Friday, take us both to the common area.” Peter cheered while Tony chuckled and shook his head as the elevator started moving. During the brief thirty seconds it took for the elevator to reach the Avengers’ common floor, hundreds of thoughts ran through the genius’ mind as he wondered what Steve needed to speak with him about. If he were given a thousand guesses, he would not have even come close to what he was about to hear.

“We’re back!” Peter called cheerily as the elevator doors opened. Tony watched as the kid bounded into the room where Steve, Natasha, Sam, and Bruce were all sitting. He wondered if the others were actually busy, or if they just wanted to avoid whatever was about to happen. Peter plopped down onto an empty couch cushion next to Natasha, clearly not having read the tense atmosphere of the room.

“Hello, Peter. Did you two have a nice time?” Natasha asked as she gave the boy a small smile; her heart didn’t quite seem in it. That worried Tony even more, and he turned his attention immediately to the captain, ignoring the woman’s question.

“Okay, Steve. Friday said you wanted to talk?” He pulled off the carefree tone flawlessly as he sat down next to Peter, crossing his legs casually. Steve looked nervous. It took every bit of self-restraint for Tony to not jiggle his leg anxiously.

“Tony…” The super soldier glanced at Peter for a brief moment before licking his lips nervously. He looked at the floor as if to gather his thoughts, before finally making eye contact with the billionaire. “I received a phone call earlier…from Wakanda.” Tony waited for him to continue. When Steve didn’t continue, Tony raise an eyebrow.

“Listen, Capsicle, I know that must be very exciting to a man of your age, but I gotta say, it’s a bit anti-climactic to—“Steve didn’t give him a chance to finish.

“From Bucky.” Tony froze. Sam looked at the genius for a split second before looking down to study his shoelaces. Bruce looked around the room, knowing that something wasn’t quite right, though unsure as to exactly what was amiss. Natasha was watching Tony’s reaction carefully, trying to read him. Steve was doing the same. Peter looked thrilled.

“You talked to Sergeant Barnes? Is he okay? Will he come back to America?” Peter started firing off a million questions. Tony only heard about half of them. His left arm was beginning to hurt. He grabbed at it, squeezing it roughly in an attempt to calm himself.

“I did speak with him,” Steve answered Peter with an uneasy chuckle, though his eyes never left Tony. “The smart, young princess of Wakanda was finally able to clear his mind of all Winter Soldier programming. It seems he has been free of it for a few months now. I think… he needs to come back to America, Tony. He hasn’t been here since the ‘40s...” Steve cleared his throat. “Not as himself.” Tony’s eyes widened and Steve spoke again quickly. “Bucky is not, and never was, the Winter Soldier. Hydra used him as a weapon. Everything he did was against his will. You know that, Tony. Bucky is a good guy. He would never willingly hurt anyone. He—“

“No.”

“Tony, he can’t stay in Wakanda forever…”

“Not my problem.” He squeezed his left arm and took a deep breath, jaw set as he looked at Steve heatedly, though his eyes couldn’t quite hide the fear behind them.

“Tony, you’re not being fair…”

“I’m not being _fair_ , Steve? _I’m_ not being _fair_? Please explain that to me because I don’t understand how after everything that he did, everything that happened, you can just sit there and—“Tony felt Peter gently grab his arm, and everyone in the room looked at the boy in surprise.

“Mr. Stark… why are you so angry with him? Sure, the Winter Soldier did bad things, but that wasn’t Sergeant Barnes, right? If he’s okay now, why can’t he come here?” Tony just shook his head.

“Pete, there’s a lot that you don’t understand, okay?” He tried to keep his voice level when talking to Peter, knowing that the pure-hearted boy was completely unaware of how the Winter Soldier has stolen his family—twice.

“But you told me about how you used to be one of the biggest weapon manufacturers in the world. And how when you realized how your weapons were being used, you stopped manufacturing them completely. And you began to use all your resources for good and stuff, right? Well, it’s not exactly the same, but kinda, isn’t it? People were taking things with your name and hurting others and giving you a bad reputation because of it. And you got a second chance, right? Why can’t Sergeant Barnes?” The kid took a deep breath after his ramble, suddenly looking sheepish at having challenged Tony in front of the others. Tony just stared at Peter for a moment, unintentionally leaning into the boy’s grounding touch. Peter didn’t know the whole story. He didn’t know that the Winter Soldier had killed Tony’s parents. He also didn’t know about the fight in Siberia where Steve had protected the Winter Soldier. Where they beat up Tony, left him half-dead, and took off with the rest of Tony’s little family of heroes. Tony realized that from Peter’s point of view, he was being a hypocritical, judgmental asshole. He knew Peter would never challenge him unless the boy truly believed his mentor was in the wrong. That left Tony with two choices: Tell Peter the entire truth about the Winter Soldier and what happened in Siberia, or invite Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes to live under his roof. Tony was silent for several minutes as he thought. Bruce looked around the room, wondering exactly what had gone down between Stark and Barnes. Sam and Natasha, who both knew more about the story than they cared to let on, leaned forward in their seats. Steve held his breath. After several moments, Tony broke the silence.

“You’re right, Kid. Everyone deserves a second chance.” The others looked shocked, and a grin spread across Steve’s face.

“Tony! I promise you won’t regret it.” Tony side-eyed the captain before turning to ruffle Peter’s hair, plastering a fake smile onto his face.

“All right, Underoos. Head on upstairs. Pick out a movie and I’ll join you in a minute.”

“Really?” Peter asked in surprise, thinking Tony would want to go straight to bed. “What an awesome day! Night everyone!” Peter called out as he headed into the elevator. The moment the doors shut, the smile slid off Tony’s face and he looked at Steve with dark eyes.

“The kid has no idea about my parents or about what happened in Siberia.” He spoke softly so that only Steve could hear him. “I don’t want to be the one responsible for tarnishing Peter’s pure-hearted view of any of you, or the rest of the world, by explaining to him just how fucked up this entire situation is. Let me make it very clear to you that Peter is the **_only_** reason I am inviting Sergeant Barnes to join us in this tower. He will stay on ** _your_** floor, and if he so much as steps out of line **_one_** time, he’s out of here. Got it?” Steve sighed softly and nodded.

“I got it… but you don’t have to worry about him. You never truly met Bucky. I actually think you two would really get along.” Tony narrowed his eyes.

“Don’t push it.” He said, before walking straight onto the elevator without so much as another word to anyone else in the room. He continued to glare with steely determination at Steve until the doors closed. Tony’s façade dropped as the elevator began to rise, and he squeezed his arm several more times, trying to catch the breath that seemed to be evading him. He dropped to the floor of the elevator, asking Friday to stop it between floors.

“Boss, should I alert Peter?” She asked, and Tony could hear just a touch of worry in her voice.

“Absolutely not.” He breathed out, eyes closed as he curled into himself.

“I’m sure that Miss Potts or Colonel Rhodes could be here in a matter of minutes.”

“Fri, just give me a minute.” He choked out softly, and his AI complied, leaving her creator in silence. It actually took Tony closer to ten minutes before he was able to steady his breathing, his mind still swirling with new fears and anxieties as it fully dawned on him that the Winter Soldier himself would be living under his roof. He felt the beginning of another panic attack and he shook his head violently as if telling it to stop. “Upstairs.” He commanded softly, and Friday immediately complied, moving the elevator upwards once again until it reached his floor. The moment he stepped out, he was greeted by Peter excitedly asking him if he felt like watching a classic Disney film or a Star Wars film. Tony chose Star Wars. Moments after settling into the couch and starting the movie, Peter ended up snuggling right up to Tony’s chest, his head lying on the older man’s shoulder as he yawned. Tony wrapped his arm around the boy, pulling him closer, his cheek resting on the top of Peter’s head. Peter was a bit surprised, but he relished the more rare display of physical affection from his father figure and sighed in contentment.

“You’re pretty comfy, Mr. Stark. Nice and squishy.” Peter teased as he poked the man’s side. Tony lightly pinched the boy’s side.

“Pretty squishy yourself, Spiderkid.”

“Spider **MAN**.”

“Mhmm. Whatever you say, Kid.” The two of them watched the movie in comfortable silence, Peter watching the movie attentively—though he already had it memorized—and Tony staring blankly at the screen as he began to think of ways to protect everyone he loved from the assassin he had just invited to move into the tower. His stomach was doing flips and he felt incredibly dizzy, but Peter was with him; keeping him grounded. By the time the movie had ended, the billionaire had calmed slightly. Peter groaned as he started to move, not wanting to get up and go to bed despite how tired he was. Tony took the opportunity to grab the remote, playing the next movie in the series.

“I feel like watching the next one. You can go to bed if you’re tired.” Peter yawned and shook his head, dropping it back to Tony’s shoulder.

“I wanna watch it too.” At that moment, Tony could not have cared less about the movie on the screen. He just didn’t want to be alone with his thoughts. He glanced down at the half-asleep boy beside him and sighed deeply.

_I sure hope you prove me wrong, Kid. The Winter Soldier has already taken my family from me twice—I don’t think I could survive it a third time._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So. Much. Irondad. I live for the fluffy father/son relationship tbh. 
> 
> The next chapter will follow Bucky as he prepares to leave Wakanda. Soon we'll start getting those Tony/Bucky interactions!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for all of the lovely comments and kudos left on the first two chapters. I'm so glad you're all enjoying the story so far, I'm having a great time writing it as well. :)

A warm breeze blew across the golden plains of Wakanda, gently tousling the former assassin’s shoulder-length hair. He looked out at the goats nibbling on the various grasses and shrubs, and a small smile formed on his lips as he felt a sense of serenity he hadn’t felt since the Second World War had begun. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, momentarily losing himself in his senses before a soft voice caused him to turn around.

“I thought I’d find you here.” The young princess said as she moved to stand beside Bucky. “You seem to spend a lot of time out here lately.”

“This place is so beautiful…so peaceful. Not like any place I’ve been before.” He hesitated for a moment as he looked out at the idyllic scene before him. “I mean, the Soldier has been all over the world. I have memories of many of those places…just—let’s just say those memories aren’t half as nice as the ones I’m making here.” Shuri nodded, knowing full well that while she was able to completely erase Hydra’s programming from the man’s mind, she could not erase the memories of what the Winter Soldier had been forced to do under the control of the fallen terrorist organization.

“You’re speaking in longer sentences now. Another sign that you’re recovering well.” She noted as the man turned to look at her.

“It’s easier around you...and your brother. You’ve given me my life back.” And while Bucky was extremely grateful for that, it did leave him wondering just exactly what he would do for the next fifty or so years until death finally came calling on him. His body was physically around the age of thirty, but in reality, he was a hundred years old and had killed more innocent people than he could count. He didn’t deserve to live a nice life. He really didn’t even deserve life at all.

“Hey, earth to Bucky.” Shuri teased, and the older man laughed softly as he realized he had gotten lost in his own thoughts, completely missing what the girl had asked him.

“Sorry, Princess. What did you say?”

“I asked what you plan to do now that we know the programming is truly gone for good. It’s been three months since you’ve woken up, and yesterday we finished the final test to confirm the Winter Soldier will never return.” Shuri grinned up at Bucky. “I think Mother would like to adopt you if you’d like to stay here and be a prince.” That made Bucky chuckle again and he shook his head.

“I ain’t no prince, Doll. I already owe you and your family a debt that I could never begin to repay.” He turned to look back across the beautiful Wakandan landscape with a sigh. “I’d like to stick around, but I haven’t been in America since the ‘40s. The Soldier was, but not me. I…well, I’d like to see if I could go back.” Shuri studied him intently before tilting her head to the side.

“You don’t look very happy at the idea of returning to America.” Bucky glanced back at her for a moment before turning his eyes forward again, not wanting to reveal his main concern to Shuri.

“The world changes quickly. Always has. Heck, I’ve only had three months to try and catch up on an entire lifetime of knowledge. And everyone I know…” His voice trailed off for a moment, but the princess just patiently waited for him to continue. “They must all be gone by now. All except Steve.”

“Why haven’t you called the Captain yet? I know he would be eager to speak to you.” Bucky smiled.

“I want to speak with him too. I guess I just…wanted to make sure the Soldier was really gone before we talked.” He turned to face Shuri again, raising his new Vibranium arm to rest his metal hand on her shoulder. “Guess now’s as good as time as any. Happen to know how I can reach him?” The girl reached up to the arm she had created, lowering it to link with her own arm.

“I know exactly where the Captain’s number is. He left it with me when you first came to Wakanda.” Shuri began to lead Bucky through the lush grass, back towards the palace where her lab was located. Once they walked into her workspace, she released Bucky’s arm and went over to a large desk, rifling through a few different things until she pulled out a small slip of paper. “Here it is.” She said as she walked back over and pulled her phone from her pocket, handing both her phone and the slip of paper to the man.

“I still can’t believe this is a phone…and it can take pictures you can see instantly.”

“Yes, the future truly is amazing.” Shuri said with a snicker and Bucky glared at her, though the glare held no real heat.

“Sure, make fun of the old man.” She stuck her tongue out at him before turning to head for the door. “Take your time, Bucky. I’ll just be annoying my brother.”

“I’ll make it quick for T’challa’s sake then.” The girl rolled her eyes but laughed once more as she left to find the king. Once alone, the playful smile disappeared from Bucky’s lips as if it had never been there at all. He hung his head, sighing deeply before looking up at the slip of paper in his hands. He missed Steve. Steve was his best friend, his brother. So why did he feel so nervous to speak with him? The man shook away his apprehension and looked down at the phone, dialing the number before he could change his mind. The phone rang only twice before Steve answered, and Bucky choked up a bit as he heard his friend’s voice on the other end of the line.

“Hello?” Bucky just stared ahead, mouth slightly agape.

“Hello?” Steve asked once again, and the man swallowed before finally speaking up in a soft tone.

“Hey, Steve… It’s Buck.”

“Bucky?” The man sounded shocked, confused, and overjoyed all at the same time. “I thought it would be several more years before I heard from you again. How are you? How long have you been awake? Were they able to get rid of Hydra’s brainwashing?”

“Yeah…been awake about three months. Princess Shuri’s a real smart cookie, Steve. Completely wiped everything Hydra did to me. Even fixed me up with a new arm made of Vibranium.” Bucky sat down in a chair and absent-mindedly fiddled with the paper in his hand.

“That’s great, Buck. I’m so happy for you,” There was a brief pause from the other end of the phone before his friend continued. “But why did it take you three months to call me?”

“Honestly….I don’t know. Guess I just wanted to make sure the soldier was really gone before I got your hopes up. The Princess ran through the entire set of trigger words with me yesterday. Brought back some horrible memories, but I didn’t even come close to losing control. Soldier’s gone for good.” The man heard Steve laugh, and he could imagine his friend’s blue eyes crinkling at the corners

“After all this time, you’re finally back. I’ll need to thank Princess Shuri and King T’Challa for everything they’ve done.” Bucky smiled as he heard this, clearing his throat softly.

“I want to come home, Steve. It’s been too long.” He hesitated before adding, “Problem is…will I be allowed back after everything I’ve done?”

“Bucky, that wasn’t you. That was Hydra.”

“Hydra might have been in control, but it was still me. Even with the soldier gone, I still have the memories of what I did to all those people, Steve." The Captain sighed deeply.

“I wish I could erase those memories for you…but that wasn’t you. By now, everyone knows that you were under Hydra’s control. In fact, you were recently pardoned of all crimes and accusations. The army announced they were awarding you with the Prisoner of War Medal after you were acquitted.” Bucky’s mouth fell open.

“I…what? When…when did this happen?”

“About three months ago.” Steve neglected to mention that he and the other rogue Avengers were also pardoned of their crimes at the same time. “You can come home, Buck. It’s okay.” The man’s mind reeled at his friend’s words. Not only had he been pardoned of his crimes, but he had been awarded a medal? He didn’t deserve to be forgiven, let alone be decorated for the pain he suffered as the Soldier. Sure, it had been pure hell, but his hands were the ones who caused countless people to suffer. How could he possibly be awarded for that?

“I…don’t know what to say.”

“Say you’ll come home.” _Home._ The word alone sounded so inviting. He closed his eyes, remembering the streets of New York just as clearly as if he’d walked them only moments ago. A warm feeling took hold of his heart as tears flooded his eyes, and, for the first time in decades, his mind was filled with nothing but pleasant memories.

“Yeah, Steve. I’ll come home.”

 

* * *

 

A glass shattered around Rhodey’s feet as he looked at Tony in disbelief.

“I’m sorry. I must have heard you wrong. Because I thought you just told me that you let Captain Righteousness talk you into inviting the Winter Soldier to live in the tower with you.” Tony’s eyes dropped to his workbench as Dum-E moved immediately over to the Colonel in an attempt to clean up the shards of glass around his feet.

“I didn’t really invite him. It was more like a mutual understanding that he be allowed to stay here.” The man said with a shrug as he swirled the alcohol in his own glass, avoiding eye contact with his best friend.

“Tony, don’t be cute. I’m the only person, aside from **_those_** two, that knows what really happened in Siberia. I was angry enough when you immediately opened the doors of the tower back up to Steve once the others were pardoned, but this?”

“I’m sorry, Honey Bear. You hardly ever stay here. I didn’t realize you cared so much.” Tony’s expression went from playful teasing to that of a child being reprimanded the moment he looked up and saw his friend’s face.

“Whether you tell me about them or not, I know that you regularly have nightmares and anxiety attacks about **_many_** different traumatic events from your past, and I know that one of those things involves Captain America and the Winter Soldier! I am well aware that you and Steve were friends in the past, so I tried to let his return go and not say anything. But this is too far, Tony. You **_cannot_** invite that soldier to live here. I’m not saying that out of anything but pure concern for your already questionable mental stability!” Tony’s jaw set and he looked at Rhodey with a cold glare as the man spoke, but by the end of his rant, the billionaire looked completely defeated.

“You honestly think I **_want_** this? There are very few people in the entire universe that truly scare me, and that soldier is one of them. I don’t care who he was in the past. Hydra turned him into the puppet that stole my family from me. Rhodey, he stole **_two_** families from me.” Tony’s voice softened as he slumped onto a stool and leaned over his workbench, running both of his hands through his hair. Vulnerability was a trait he rarely displayed, but on the rare occasions he did, it was almost exclusively to his best friend.

“Then tell Steve his friend can’t stay here.” Rhodes said as he moved closer to put a comforting hand on Tony’s shoulder.

“It’s not that easy.”

“Why not?” Tony huffed softly, not wanting to open up more than necessary. Rhodey rolled his eyes. “Seems pretty easy to me. Just go up to him and say, ‘Hey, Cap. Remember how I agreed to let the assassin, who killed my parents and almost killed me, move into my tower? Well, I changed my mind.’” The genius shook his head and slammed his drink down onto the workbench.

“Steve will pick him! He **_always_** picks his precious Bucky. If I turn him down, he might leave the tower. He might take the others with him again...” Tony’s voice trailed off slowly before he looked up at Rhodey, eyes brimming with tears—though his friend pretended not to notice. “Last time we fought, Thor and Bruce weren’t on earth. They might follow him too… and Peter…what if he takes Peter?”

“Okay, first of all, I know you don’t want to lose Steve and the others, but if they choose to leave again, then I say good riddance! They need you far more than you need them, Tony. And in regards to Peter…” Rhodey’s voice softened at the boy’s name, “You know that Peter loves you. You’re like a father to the kid. If the others left, you know he wouldn’t join them. Would he do something stupid like sneak out on a school night in an attempt to whoop their asses for hurting you? Probably. But he’d never choose them over you. Not even if they took Thor.” Tony laughed softly and looked back up at his friend.

“You’re right…about Peter I mean. Thing is, he’s the reason I agreed to this in the first place.” Tony said with a sigh.

“Come again?”

“He was there when Cap mentioned…his friend. You should have seen him, Rhodes. He was so excited to meet **_the_** Sergeant James Barnes. I told Steve no. No way. But Pete…he didn’t understand. He talked about how I used to make weapons that were used to harm others. People blamed me for that, but I got a second chance. Barnes didn’t choose to become the Winter Soldier, so shouldn’t he get a second chance? With that kind of logic, I realized I was coming off as a judgmental asshole to the kid who desperately was hoping to see me, fuck up of all fuck-ups, give a second chance to a renowned war hero.”

“If you told Peter what really happened between you two…”

“Absolutely not.”

“Tony…”

“Rhodey. Stop. I’m not telling the kid about my history with The Winter Soldier.”

“Why not?”

“He…doesn’t need to know.” Rhodey growled and threw up his hands in frustration.

“All right, Tony. Fine. Have it your way. Bottle up your emotions like you always do. Don’t share them with anyone. Let someone who terrifies you move into your home so you don’t have to show a single moment of vulnerability to an extremely understanding child who adores you. That makes perfect sense.” Rhodes said heatedly before turning and walking to the lab’s door, glancing back at Tony as he gripped the doorknob. “Don’t say I didn’t warn you, Tony.” And with that, he exited with a slam of the door, the genius staring after him and nursing his left arm as a dejected sigh escaped his lips.

Once at the end of the long hallway near the elevator, the Colonel stopped to lean against the wall, squeezing the bridge of his nose as he let out a long, exasperated groan.

“Friday, you’ll call me if Tony needs me, right?” He asked, not wanting his friend to suffer one of his bad attacks alone, even if the younger man was making the idiotic decision that may lead to said panic attack.

“Of course, Colonel. Boss would disengage me if I called anyone aside from you.” A corner of Rhodey’s mouth turned up into a half smile at Friday’s remark.

_Tony, I hope you know what you’re getting yourself into._


	4. Chapter 4

A nervous excitement radiated off Bucky as he stood in his favorite, secluded spot once again, enjoying a final sunset in Wakanda. The sun cast golden rays across the plains, and he smiled to himself as he watched the goats he had grown quite fond of nibble at the various flora they happened upon. The sky looked like a brilliant watercolor painting, warm oranges and reds melting together before meeting the soft violet that would soon encompass the night sky. The man tried to memorize every detail, never wanting to forget the beauty of this country that he had come to love.

_I ain’t ever going to see anything like this in New York._ He thought to himself. Just as he turned to head back to the palace, he saw Wakanda’s princess standing a short distance behind him, arms folded over her chest, watching him with amusement.

“Shuri! To what do I owe the pleasure?” He asked, and Shuri walked closer, unable to hide her pleased expression. This was her first time witnessing the older man with such a large, genuine smile on his face. It suited him.

“I wanted to make sure that you didn’t forget we were holding a farewell party for you tonight. Mother would be heartbroken if she didn’t get a proper goodbye from her White Wolf.” Bucky chuckled and nodded.

“I would never dream of leaving without a proper goodbye.” He turned back to the beautiful scene behind him and looked at it almost wistfully. “New York’s nothing like this place. I just wanted to see it one more time to make sure I won’t forget anything.” Shuri laughed.

“Old man!” She teased as she took out her phone, carefully taking a few snapshots of the landscape Bucky had been admiring. Then she ran up beside him and hit a button on the touchscreen, flipping the camera so that their faces appeared on the screen. “Selfie time. Smile!” Bucky’s eyes lit up as he grinned, and Shuri took their picture. “I’ll print these tonight and give them to you. Then you will never forget Wakanda…or me.” Her usually cheerful tone held a hint of sadness, and Bucky took her hand in his Vibranium one, holding it tightly.

“How could I forget you, Princess? You’ve given me my life back, you made me a new arm, and you’ve done your very best to teach this old man about life in the twenty-first century. Why, I’d say that makes you my best girl.” Shuri perked up at this as the two re-traced their steps back towards the palace.

“I _have_ been a good teacher, haven’t I? All right, let’s see how well you remember everything. Hmm…how do my eyebrows look?” She asked, trying not to laugh when she saw a look of serious determination fall upon the older man’s face.

“On fleek.” He said, hardly pausing before he answered.

“Why do you need to read the news?”

“…I have to stay woke.”

“What if I told you some ladies are sipping tea at the table next to yours?”

“Those gals can sip all the tea they like as long as they aren’t throwing shade while doing it.” Shuri grinned. She wished she could be in New York to see people’s reactions when the hundred-year-old man she had adopted as her older brother started to speak like a teenager. It might be a little mean of her, but she knew Bucky would find it funny eventually.

The two reached the palace moments later, stepping inside to attend the party being held in Bucky’s honor. The event was very bittersweet for the man. On one hand, he was genuinely sad to be leaving the warm Wakandans he had grown so fond of, but on the other hand, he was going back to New York. Back to Steve. He was going home. The thought made Bucky grin from ear to ear, and he decided to live in the moment, enjoying his last few hours in Wakanda before starting his journey home.

* * *

 

It was nearly ten o’clock when T’Challa walked over to Bucky and put a hand on his shoulder, letting him know that the aircraft was ready. Bucky actually felt butterflies in his stomach as he finished saying his goodbyes, leaving everyone with the promise that he would return for a visit someday. The Queen moved closer and linked her arm with Bucky’s, causing him to smile as he turned to T’Challa.

“I’m ready.” The King led Bucky and his mother away from the party to the Royal Talon Fighter where Shuri was waiting for them.

“She’s all ready for you!” The girl called cheerily as she hopped out of the aircraft and walked over to join her family. “I have the coordinates Captain Rogers sent a few days ago. I’ll be remotely piloting the ship for you, so you can just relax. You should reach New York in about twelve hours.” Bucky smiled and nodded.

“Thanks, Princess.” He turned to the Queen who looked at him with a sad smile, and she immediately moved to wrap her arms around him. Bucky did not hesitate to return the gesture.

“I’m so happy for you. Just remember that you always have a home here if New York isn’t what you remember.” The man smiled and pulled away, gently taking Queen Ramonda’s hand and moving it to his lips, pressing a soft kiss to the back of it. “I don’t deserve your kindness, Queen Mother. I hope that New York’s everything I remembered, but either way, I’ll be back to visit.” The woman smiled at him through teary eyes and nodded as T’Challa moved to squeeze the super soldier’s flesh arm. Bucky turned to the king with a grin and hugged him, patting his back before pulling away.

“We’ll keep in touch, but it will be lonely without you around.” T’Challa dropped his voice to a whisper, though it was purposefully loud enough for Shuri to hear. “Now that you’re leaving, I’ll have to deal with Shuri all alone. I’m not sure if I can handle that again.” Bucky reared his head back and laughed as Shuri flipped T’Challa off, smiling sweetly and offering an apology when her mother reprimanded her.

“I think I need one more hug before I go.” Bucky said, walking over to Shuri, somewhat surprised when she launched herself straight into his arms.

“I know you must leave. But I really wish you wouldn’t.” A fond smile spread across his lips as he squeezed the girl in his arms.

“Hey, I’ll be back someday. And maybe sometime you can come visit New York. You’re my best girl, so I can’t go too long without seeing ya, right?” Shuri nodded and pulled away to allow Bucky to board the ship. He headed up into the fighter but turned back around in the doorway when he suddenly remembered something. “Shuri, where are those pictures you promised me?”

“They’re already on the ship for you. Unlike you, I’m not old, so I remembered the pictures ages ago.” She replied with a smirk and the corner of his lips twitched as he gave her a playful glare. Bucky then raised his Vibranium arm to wave goodbye before moving fully inside the ship, the doors closing behind him.

Once on the aircraft, he went and sat down, crossing his legs as he felt the aircraft begin its ascent. He smiled as he noticed the pictures Shuri had taken set next to a small basket of plums. He put the photos carefully into his pocket and grabbed a plum, taking a big bite out of it. It hit him all at once that he was actually going back to America for the first time in over seventy years. Well, he had _technically_ been in America several times throughout the past seven decades, but it wasn’t really him. It was the Winter Soldier. The thought of the Soldier caused him to bite his lip. In Wakanda, no one had been frightened of him. They all understood that he had no control over what he had done in the past. But what about in America? The thought occurred to him for the first time, and he suddenly hoped that he was not making a mistake by going back. Dark thoughts flooded his mind as he finished off the plum, but he shook his head from side to side, willing the thoughts away.

_Steve is home. Everything will be okay when we’re together. It will be like old times. I just know it._

As he repeated that to himself several times, Bucky leaned back in his chair and closed his eyes, drifting off to sleep as his aircraft soared through the night sky.

* * *

It was only three hours later when Bucky awoke with a start, tears flowing down his face as he bolted upright in his seat. He gasped for air, trying to calm himself down enough to steady his breathing. It took him several minutes, but soon he was breathing evenly again. He stood up to cross the small aircraft, finding a bottle of water and chugging it greedily, some water spilling over his lips as he drank. He dragged the back of his hand across his mouth and then returned to his seat, shivering slightly despite being warm.

Nightmares were almost a nightly occurrence for him. Bucky regularly dreamed of the torture he had endured with Hydra, or worse, the murders the Winter Soldier had committed. Usually, these nightmares would keep him up for hours before he was finally calm enough to fall back asleep. However, this nightmare was different. This was the nightmare that haunted him more than any of the others combined; the Winter Soldier’s memory of murdering the Starks. The other murders still haunted him, of course, but it was a bit easier to detach himself from those as he had never met the Soldier’s victims. He didn’t know the people he had killed or if they even had families. The Starks were different. Though he had never met Maria Stark, he had known Howard personally. He had also met their son. The son that was left orphaned at seventeen by the murders committed at his hand. Bucky didn’t know much about Tony, but he didn’t blame the other man one bit for attacking him the day he found out that the death of his parents was not an accident, but a murder committed by the Winter Soldier. He vaguely remembered fighting Tony in self-defense, but his memories were still hazy from that time as the only clear memories he had of being the Winter Soldier were the most traumatic ones. Wasn’t he lucky?

“Tony Stark.” He said the name aloud, shrinking back in his seat as if something terrible might happen just by speaking the man’s name. He had yet to catch up with Steve—they had decided they would rather do it in person—and Bucky suddenly wondered if Steve was still friends with Tony. If they were still friends, would his return cause a problem between the two of them? The thought made him frown. He needed to apologize to the man, that was certain, but he doubted the other man would want to see him. He could write a letter, but that seemed like such a cowardly way to go about apologizing. If he ever saw the man face-to-face, he was certain the younger man would try to attack him again. This time, he had a clear mind. He wouldn’t fight back. He would take whatever Tony Stark wanted to dish out. If Tony Stark wanted to kill him…well…he did deserve it after all.

Bucky curled into himself and looked down at his Vibranium arm, extremely grateful that Shuri had replaced the arm that had taken so many lives. He closed his eyes, but all he could see were the lifeless bodies of the Starks, and his eyes flew open again as his chest tightened. He suddenly wondered if the nightmares might stop if he received forgiveness. In the beginning, Steve telling him that he had been pardoned of all crimes had been somewhat of a relief. However, it had ultimately only increased the guilt that he felt about the Winter Soldier’s actions. He knew that only one man had the power to truly forgive him in the way that he so desperately wanted. That man was Tony Stark. A man that not only terrified Bucky, but one that he was sure would never be able to grant him the forgiveness he desired. He ran his fingers through his long, brown hair and choked back a sob, willing the aircraft to travel more quickly. He just wanted to see Steve. He leaned back in the chair as tears trailed down his cheeks, knowing that he would not be able to sleep again until he arrived in America.  

* * *

The next nine hours passed so slowly that it might as well have been nine days as far as Bucky was concerned. However, the moment the skyline of New York came into view, the man was excitedly pressed up against the window, eyes wide as he looked down at his home. He recognized it immediately even though it looked so very different from the place he remembered. According to the clock Shuri had placed in the fighter, it was about 8 PM in New York. A big smile spread across Bucky’s face as he looked out at the dazzling lights of the city.

_It might not be the natural beauty of Wakanda, but it sure is pretty._

He soon felt the fighter begin to slow down, and he frowned in confusion as they were still in the middle of the city. Where exactly was Shuri supposed to land this thing? He looked out again, his eyes widening as he noticed that the tower they were headed towards was lit up with a giant “A” on the front of it. He recognized it immediately from some of the reading Shuri had him do, and he suddenly felt a bit sick to his stomach. It hadn’t even occurred to him that Steve might not live alone. Would he, the villain, be moving into a house full of superheroes? He was sure they wouldn’t let a former Hydra assassin move in; even if he had been an assassin against his will. He gasped softly as another thought occurred to him: Tony Stark was a part of the Avengers. Would he be at the tower? The man shook his head. There was no way. Tony Stark would never allow the man who killed his parents to live in the same tower. That is, unless Tony was planning on killing him. The possibility that the younger man was plotting his slow, gruesome murder seemed very high to Bucky, and he prayed silently that Steve wouldn’t be stupid enough to try and have him live within ten miles—let alone in the same tower—as Tony Stark. The more he thought about it, the more he realized that Steve probably _was_ that stupid, and he nervously chewed on his bottom lip as he watched the tower grow closer.

It was only about five more minutes until the ship reached the helipad at the top of the tower. As the ship was landing, he momentarily forgot his worries, a huge grin spreading across Bucky’s face as he recognized Steve waving to him from the helipad. The moment the fighter’s door opened, he rushed out and down the ramp to give Steve a big hug.

“Buck, I missed you so much.” His friend said as he squeezed him tightly.

“I missed you too. I’m so glad to be home.” And for a split second in Bucky’s mind, they were back in the late 1930s; before the war and the super soldier serums that had changed their lives forever.

“You don’t know how much I’ve missed you. That surprise phone call from you a few weeks ago was one of the best days of my life, and if you think I’m exaggerating, you’re sorely mistaken.” Bucky laughed as he released his friend and looked him over, fondness in his eyes.

“Since when did you become such a sweet-talker, Stevie? Been practicing with the ladies while I was away?” He teased, and Steve swung a playful punch at the man who dodged it with a grin.

“Ha ha. Very funny.” The Captain paused for a moment before turning to put his arm around his friend. “C’mon, Buck. It’s cold up here. Let’s head inside.” Bucky hesitated before following, which caused Steve to frown.

“Something wrong?”

“I, uh… I noticed this tower has the Avengers symbol on it.” Steve chuckled.

“Well, it is Avengers tower, Buck.”

“Is Tony Stark here?” He blurted out.

“He is.” A frown crossed Steve’s face as he squeezes his friend’s shoulder. “Hey, don’t worry about it. He won’t attack you again. I talked with him about it. He likes to spend a lot of time alone in his lab, so you two probably won’t even see much of each other.” Steve said as he led his friend into the tower. Somehow, Bucky didn’t believe that it could be _that_ easy for Steve to have convinced Tony to allow him to stay in the tower. That only confirmed his theory that Tony was scheming against him. The thought made him shudder a bit, but he had already decided he wouldn’t fight back no matter what Tony had planned for him. He deserved it; no matter how horrible it may be.

Steve led Bucky inside the tower and into an elevator.

“Welcome, Sergeant Barnes.” Bucky startled, looked around wildly for the woman who had greeted him. Steve started to chuckle as he pointed to the ceiling. “That’s Friday, Tony’s AI. Friday, take us to the common room, please.”

“Yes, Captain Rogers.” The voice responded and the elevator immediately started moving.

“AI?” Bucky looked confused.

“Artificial Intelligence. Basically, a computer that has the intelligence to perform tasks like humans.”

“Oh.” He looked up at the ceiling for a moment. Wow, Stark not only had an excellent motive to kill him, but he really was a genius as Bucky had heard. This situation wasn’t looking great for him.

A few moments later, the doors to the elevator slid open to reveal an elaborate, yet comfortable looking living area where the sounds of several voices could be heard. As the two men stepped into the room, Bucky unconsciously shrank behind Steve, his hair falling a bit in front of his eyes. When they approached, the conversation died down, and the others turned to stare at them. Bucky scanned the room. Some faces were familiar, others were not, but it only took a moment for his eyes to fall upon Tony Stark. Suddenly, a teenager sprang towards him, speaking so quickly that it made Bucky’s head spin. He turned his eyes to the boy, trying to follow his excited rambling, but all he could concentrate on was what he perceived to be the icy death glare of Tony Stark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, that was a lot. Hopefully, you guys are still enjoying the story. Next chapter we'll be going back to Tony and his day leading up to the moment we ended on here. After that, we'll finally move on to some interactions between the two. 
> 
> Good news is that you only need to wait two more days until the next chapter. :)


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you for your kudos and lovely comments. Your kind words have really given me the motivation to keep writing quickly. :)

Tony woke up in a sweat, groaning as he turned to look at the clock on his bedside table.

_8:47 A.M._

The man had managed to get a whole three hours of sleep. Of course, it hardly counted as sleep considering Tony spent the entire time tossing and turning during a bad dream. Somehow, he actually felt more tired now than he did three hours ago. Go figure.

Though he didn’t have any other plans for the day, the genius knew he was far too anxious to attempt any more sleep. It was less than twelve hours until the Winter Soldier was due to arrive at the tower, and the thought of the former assassin’s arrival made his stomach churn. With a grunt, the half-asleep man pushed back the covers and slowly got out of bed, making his way into the bathroom to take a shower. Tony peeled off his sweaty pajamas, kicking them aside before stepping into the shower. He turned it on, immediately moving the nozzle all the way to the left so that the water would heat up. He let out a whine as a burst of icy water jolted him awake, but as the water slowly warmed up, he felt himself get a bit drowsy once again. Grabbing his shampoo, he squeezed some out of the bottle and massaged it over his scalp before rinsing it from his hair. Tony sighed while the hot water ran down his body, soothing his aching muscles. As he stood under the steady stream of water, Tony began to think about the arrival of the Winter Soldier, causing him to clutch at his chest when panic overwhelmed his senses.

_No. Get a grip of yourself, Tony. You’re fine. You will be fine. You’re a genius for goodness’ sake—use your brain! Peter was right when he said that Barnes deserves a second chance, wasn’t he? You know the guy was being controlled by Hydra. Hydra killed your parents. Not him. The way Cap goes on and on about his best friend, they’re probably exactly the same. Barnes must be just another well-meaning idiot who is so wrapped up in doing what he thinks is right, that he doesn’t stop to consider how he is affecting other people. I know how to deal with that…He won’t try to hurt you. He won’t try to hurt your family. He won’t try to steal your family._

Tony grabbed his body wash, soaping up as he tried to reason with himself. In his mind, he knew that Sergeant Barnes was a well-loved war hero; a real all-American. How could he not trust that? Then it suddenly occurred to him that Steve was also a well-loved war hero—he was _the_ Captain America—and yet Steve had lied to him, fought him, and left him half-dead in Siberia. Tony felt sick to his stomach. He decided that he didn’t want to think anymore, so he quickly turned off the shower and hopped out. Grabbing a towel, he quickly dried off and went back into his room, finding a pair of jeans and a graphic tee. He threw them both on and then headed out of his room and into the elevator.

“Common area, Fri.” He said as he leaned back against the wall, arms crossed over his chest. Yep, what he needed was definitely a hot cup of coffee and a lot of distraction.

When the doors opened, Tony strolled onto the floor and headed towards the kitchen, smiling when he heard a familiar, booming laugh. He turned the corner to find Thor sitting at the kitchen table with Peter and Loki. The billionaire strolled up behind the large god, grinning as he squeezed Thor’s shoulders.

“Thor, I didn’t know you were coming back!” He exclaimed, genuinely happy to see the other man. Thor was one of the few Avengers he still trusted whole-heartedly; Tony knew that the god's moral compass needed no calibration. The genius enjoyed being around Thor’s never-ending positivity. He was willing to bet Thor had never had a panic attack before. What a lucky guy.

“Tony!” Thor greeted, clapping a hand over one of Tony’s hands that rested on his shoulders. “I arrived in New York last night. My people have been settling well into our new home. Now that I know they are happy and safe, I thought I’d come here to spend some time with Loki. I’ve missed him terribly.” Loki rolled his eyes, though no one in the room missed the small smile that had been on his lips only a moment before.

“Really, Brother,” Loki began in a condescending tone, “You’re the King of Asgard now. You can’t just go gallivanting around Midgard, ignoring your royal duties for such a childish reason. What would Father think?” Thor didn’t blink an eye at his brother’s rebuke.

“Ah yes, but what would mother think?” Thor countered with a knowing smile. Tony watched as the smaller god fell silent, cheeks flushing ever so slightly as he cleared his throat and moved his teacup back to his lips. Though he wasn’t exactly sure what had just happened, Tony knew that Thor had quelled whatever little fight Loki was trying to start.

“Mr. Stark!” Peter interceded before anyone else could speak again. “Thor said that when Loki finally gets to go home to the new Asgard, he’ll let me come too and I can stay as a guest in their palace! How cool is that?”

“Uh, hold up there a minute, Bud. Since when do you call adults by their first names?” Tony asked in amusement, brow raised. Peter just flushed.

“Well, Mr. Stark, Thor just insisted and Loki did too…”

“And how many times have I told you to just call me ‘Tony’?”

“Well, that’s different…”

“How so?”

“Well… you’re like my _dad_. Thor and Loki are like my cool uncles!” Tony couldn’t conceal the happiness on his face when Peter referred to him as his dad.

“And since when do people call their dads ‘Mr.’?”

“Ughhh, Mr. Stark, that isn’t what’s important here! The important thing is that I’m going to go stay in a _real_ castle. Ned’s so going to die when I tell him!” Tony shook his head and chuckled. Someday he’d get the kid to stop calling him “Mr. Stark”.

“Who’s Ned?” Thor asked, grinning at Peter.

“Ned is my best friend. He’s my guy in the chair!” Peter said enthusiastically. “He’s the only other person outside of this tower that knows I’m Spiderman, well, besides my Aunt May.”

“He sounds like a trustworthy friend. Perhaps he should join you when you come to visit Asgard.” Peter’s jaw dropped open and he looked excitedly between the three men in front of him.

“Oh my god! Ned is going to _freak out_ when I tell him that Thor invited him to Asgard! Thank you, Mr. Thor! I mean just Thor! Oh my gosh, I have to call him right now!” Peter stood up and grabbed his phone before running around the corner to an empty room to call his friend. Tony laughed and moved to pour himself a cup of coffee before joining the brothers at the table, wanting to catch up with his friend. Tony and Thor spoke mainly about the process of the Asgardians settling into their new home while Loki listened quietly, occasionally interjecting his thoughts into the conversation. Nearly an hour had passed before a disheveled, tired looking Steve walked into the kitchen. Tony’s mouth was already open to make a quip about the man’s appearance, but Loki beat him to it.

“My, my. Someone appears tired this morning. Tell me, Captain, did you count sheep last night, or fight them?” Loki asked pointedly and Tony laughed loudly, turning to Thor.

“By the way, Loki’s doing wonderfully here. He’s free to stay as long as he likes.” Steve rolled his eyes and groaned as he walked over to one of the kitchen cabinets, pulling out a mug for coffee.

“I was too excited about Buck’s arrival. Couldn’t fall asleep last night.” Tony’s face fell at the mention of the very thing he had been trying to avoid thinking about. His mask was only off for a split second, but it was enough time for the ever-observant God of Mischief to notice. Loki raised an eyebrow, quizzically staring at Tony for a brief moment as he pondered the billionaire’s reaction. “It’s good to see you, Thor.” The tired super-soldier said, clapping the large god on the shoulder as he joined the other men at the table. Thor smiled at the man in response.

“You too, Steve. But who is this ‘Buck’ you speak of?” The Captain grinned and Tony couldn’t help but roll his eyes; Steve never would pass up a chance to talk about his best friend.

“Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes—but everyone calls him ‘Bucky’. He’s been my best friend since we were kids…he’s going to stay here for a while.” Steve stole a glance at Tony who was purposefully avoiding eye contact with him. Loki looked between the two men and raised his brow

“Forgive me, Steve, but I’m afraid I don’t understand how that’s possible. You’re a hundred years old…most humans rarely live so long…” Thor trailed off, looking confused. Steve laughed softly and nodded.

“That’s true…back during the war, Bucky was experimented on after being captured by the enemy. I was able to rescue him, and we ended up going on missions against Hydra together. During one of those missions, he fell from a train. I thought he had died. Shortly after that, I crashed into the ocean and, well, that’s when I was frozen for seventy years. Anyway, a few years ago, I found out that Bucky was still alive. Turns out that when he had been captured, he was injected with a super soldier serum similar to my own. After I thought he had died, he was taken by Hydra. They replaced his left arm with a metal one and completely brainwashed him. The bastards used him as their personal assassin, freezing him when he wasn’t working so that he wouldn’t age.” Steve sighed sadly as he thought of everything his friend had gone through. Tony was biting his lip and squeezing his left arm violently, so pre-occupied with preventing a panic attack that he didn’t realize Loki was studying him intently. “Well,” Steve began again, “the Hydra programming has been completely removed from Bucky’s mind, thanks to the Princess of Wakanda. He has spent his time recovering there, but now it’s time for him to come home.”

“That’s quite a story!” Thor said, clearly impressed. “Most humans are young and weak, but I admire the strength and resilience of you and your friend. I’m quite looking forward to meeting him.”

“What a nice conversation for this weak, young human to be a part of.” Tony said drolly, desperate to change the subject. Thor chuckled.

“Tony, you’re a man of iron. You hardly qualify as being weak.” Tony opened his mouth to protest, but Loki spoke first.

“And certainly not _young_.” The hint of a smile twitched at the corner of Loki’s lips and Tony turned back to Thor.

“Forget what I said earlier. Please take your brother back to Asgard as soon as possible.” Thor laughed loudly and looked at his brother.

“Loki, be nice to our friend.”

“I didn’t realize that telling the truth qualified as an act of unkindness. Forgive me, Stark. I was under the impression that you were aware of your age.”

“Mhmm. I’ve had just about enough out of you, Elsa.”

“Merely having a bit of fun. You should _let it go_.” Tony raised an eyebrow at the god’s pun.

“Peter made me watch Frozen with him yesterday.”

“Ah.” As if on cue, the boy walked back into the kitchen.

“Did I just hear my name?” The boy asked curiously, looking around the room.

“I just told Stark that you made me watch Frozen with you.” Loki replied as the men turned their attention to Peter.

“I _made_ you? You totally loved it.”

“Love is a strong word, Little One. You should use it wisely.” Peter huffed and folded his arms over his chest.

“You’re the one who teared up and said, **_and I quote_** , “The parallels between this film and my life are truly astounding.” Loki cleared his throat uncomfortably while Steve and Thor listened curiously, neither of them ever having seen the movie. Tony, however, turned to Loki with a smirk on his face.

“Is that so? What parallels could that movie _possibly_ have to your life? From what I recall, it’s about two sisters, both princesses, and the younger one idolizes her older—“ The mischievous god cut Tony off as he raised a hand, his fingertips glowing green.

“Would you care to know what it feels like to be struck through the heart with a shard of ice?” Both Thor and Steve look alarmed, unaware that Loki was still referencing the movie. Tony was unfazed.

“I’m up to try anything once. Besides, Petey here could just come give me a hug. An act of true love is all it takes to thaw a frozen heart, right?” Tony smirked at Loki as Peter beamed, cheeks slightly flushed.

“That’s right, Mr. Stark!” The god groaned as he squeezed the bridge of his nose.

“I’m getting a headache.” Peter laughed and then turned to Thor, quickly telling him about how excited Ned had been to hear about the invitation to Asgard. As he talked, the other Avengers slowly woke up and began to shuffle into the kitchen, grabbing coffee and bowls of cereal. A warm feeling filled Tony’s heart as he talked and laughed with the others, and he tried desperately not to think about the potential threat to his family who was due to arrive that evening.

* * *

 

It was late in the evening by the time the Avengers had finished their dinner. They were just entering the lounge together when Steve pulled out his phone, grinning widely.

“I just got a message from Princess Shuri that Bucky will be here in a few minutes. I’m going to wait for him on the helipad.” Tony’s stomach dropped as the others chattered with a bit more excitement than usual.

_Stay calm, Tony. He’s not the Winter Soldier. He’s just a poor old guy who was tortured for seventy years. Yeah. The Winter Soldier is not coming into your home._

Tony spent the next few minutes trying to calm himself down. It had even begun to work until Steve walked in with Bucky. The large soldier was hidden partway behind Steve, his long hair hanging in front of his eyes. The man scanned the room, nodding a bit at Natasha and Sam before his eyes fell on Tony. Bucky only made eye contact for a split second before Peter jumped in front of the newcomer. Tony felt a shiver go up his spine as he stared at Bucky with wide, fearful eyes.

“Wow! Hi, Sergeant Barnes! It’s nice to see you again. You look great. Captain Rogers says you’re all better now. I’m glad you’re staying with us. Wow, is that a new arm? It’s so cool!” Peter rambled excitedly. Bucky stared at Peter with widened eyes.

“Have…we met?” Bucky asked, looking terribly confused.

“Yeah, remember the airport in Germany?” The soldier seemed to think for several moments before his eyes widened and he looked Peter up and down.

“You’re the one that talked a lot. In the blue and red suit.” Peter grinned proudly.

“Yep! I’m Spiderman.”

“You’re… a kid!” Tony wanted to grab Peter and get him the hell away from the Winter Soldier, but Loki had already stepped in front of the boy, blocking the teenager as if shielding him from a monster.

“Peter, don’t overwhelm our guest. Hello, Sergeant Barnes. It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance.” Loki said, bowing slightly. “I’m Loki, Prince of Asgard, Odinson, the rightful King of Jotunheim, God of Mischief—“

“A god? Steve, what the hell?” Bucky asked softly, looking up at the tall god with wide eyes.

“Yeah, Buck.” Steve chuckled softly as he motioned toward Thor. “This is Loki’s older brother Thor. He’s the God of Thunder and King of Asgard.” Bucky turned his eyes to Thor who stepped forward and gave the man a friendly smile and a strong handshake. “And this is Dr. Bruce Banner.” Bruce also stepped forward, shaking Bucky’s hand.

“Hey, nice to meet you.”

“Likewise.”

“And…I believe you’ve met everyone else.” Steve said and Bucky nodded silently in response. When Steve suggested everyone continue to sit and talk together, Tony took that as his opportunity to flee, gripping his arm as he walked straight into the elevator.

“My floor, Friday.” The elevator began to move rapidly and Tony gasped for air, hot tears slipping past his lashes. That man in his tower, the man with his family, was the man who had murdered his parents. Tony had tried to convince himself that the man was not the same. But he looked the same. He didn’t look kind and funny like Steve always portrayed him to be. He looked big and terrifying. Tony regretted not listening to Rhodey.

The moment Tony got to his floor, he sat on the couch in his living room, not even bothering to have Friday turn on the lights. He held his head in his hands, tears silently streaming down his face as he tried to take deep, even breaths. It took him about fifteen minutes, but he finally calmed down, wiping away his final tears as he inhaled deeply again. Suddenly, he heard the doors to the elevator open and he breathed a sigh of relief that Peter had narrowly missed witnessing his panic attack. He cleared his throat, purposefully making his voice sound cheery as he turned around.

“Hey, Bud. What are you doing…” His voice trailed off and his eyes went dark as he stood up angrily. “How the hell did you get up here?” shouted Tony as he stared hard at Loki, who somehow had managed to get up to the floor that was restricted to Himself and Peter.

“Calm down, Stark. There’s no need to get upset.”

“Like hell there’s not. Only Peter and I have access to this floor, and I know for a fact that your magic won’t work on Friday.”

“Ah! There lies your fatal flaw, Stark. You may have programmed Friday to work against the God of Mischief’s magic. However, it seems that she succumbs to the charm of Asgard’s youngest prince quite easily.” Tony glared daggers at Loki, who was clearly quite proud of himself.

“Friday is too smart to fall for your so-called charm… Friday, video playback from when Jack Frost got into the elevator.” Now Loki glared at Tony. A video immediately appeared in front of the men, showing that Loki had persuaded Friday to override her regular protocols by questioning her if Tony was all right. He had continually stated how worried he was by Tony’s behavior and that he wanted to help him. Tony rolled his eyes as he watched the footage. Friday **_would_** override protocols if she thought it would help his well-being. He’d definitely have to fix that the second he got Loki out of his hair.   

“All right, Loki.” Tony said as he waved the video away. “You clearly want something, so talk. You have two minutes before I kick you off my floor.”

“Why are you so afraid of the Captain’s friend?” Loki asked, deciding not to waste time if he was only granted two minutes. Tony scoffed.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes, I suppose it’s quite normal to look terrified and have some sort of…anxiety attack whenever someone talks about their friend.” Tony couldn’t conceal the surprise on his face, not realizing anyone had noticed his true feelings at all. “When I first noticed it, I dismissed it as nothing. However, the more I thought about it, the more I realized that this Sergeant Barnes must have done something truly terrible for you to have such a reaction to him living here. After all, I once threw you off this very tower and never once have I seen you look as frightened as when the Sergeant arrived. I wonder why that is?” Tony felt his breathing grow shakier. He did not want to deal with this right now.

“It’s just different.”

“How? I know you were not pleased when Thor asked you to allow me to stay here.”

“I said it’s different. Thor told me you had changed.”

“Did the Captain not say the same thing about his friend?” Tony was silent, for once in his life not having a comeback. Understanding filled Loki’s eyes and he looked at the genius, raising an eyebrow.

“You don’t trust the Captain.” His voice sounded far too filled with amusement and Tony shook his head.

“Two minutes is up. Get off my floor before I tell your brother about the little stunt you pulled.” Loki raised his hands in surrender.

“I’m leaving, Stark. I’ve gotten enough answers for tonight.” Loki walked back to the elevator and the doors shut immediately, taking him away from Tony’s floor. The billionaire groaned and buried his face in his hands for a few moments. As physically tired as Tony was, he was even more mentally and emotionally drained. Knowing that he might break down if he had another nightmare, he headed down to his lab to distract himself by adjusting the security on Friday’s protocols.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, our two main characters are finally in the same place now! Poor boys are both having a rough time right now, but things will start to look up for them soon. :)
> 
> Loki is so bored that he's purposefully going out of his way to try and learn everything about everyone. I imagine if Loki had a youtube channel, he would have a drama channel. Wouldn't that be fun to watch?


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please see the end notes :)

Tony woke up, back and neck stiff. Why did everything hurt so much? As he sat up, he realized that he had fallen asleep sitting on a stool in his lab, cheek resting on his metal workbench. He groaned while standing up; stretching in an attempt to alleviate the stiffness in his back and joints. It wasn’t the most pleasant way to wake up, but he had slept without having a single nightmare, so who was he to complain?

“Friday, how long was I out for?” He asked, tugging his shirt back down over his stomach as he finished stretching.

“You slept for exactly two hours and twenty-seven minutes.” Tony hummed a bit as he headed out of his lab and down the hall to the elevator.

“Not too shabby.” The doors to the elevator opened as he neared them, and the man stepped inside, not saying a word as Friday moved the elevator up to his floor. Tony smiled. “Sweetheart, have you learned to read my mind? I’m impressed.”

“Well, **_you_** were the one who programmed me to recognize and learn from your patterns of behavior.” The AI replied, sounding quite sassy.

“Ah yes, I’d recognize that biting sarcasm anywhere. You’re definitely mine.” He said in amusement as Friday opened the doors, revealing his floor. Tony stepped out and headed toward his room. “Is Peter up yet?”  


“Not yet, but he went to bed fairly early last night. I imagine he’ll be up within the next hour or so.”

“Good. Have a box of donuts sent over from that little bakery around the corner. Make sure there are at least a few of the donuts with the pink frosting and rainbow sprinkles—those are Pete’s favorite.”

“Should I have them sent to the lounge downstairs?”

“No…up here, Fri. I wanna have breakfast just the kid and I.” He said, still too tired to try dealing with a Barnes-induced panic attack.

“Understood, Boss.” Tony moved to his room, taking a quick shower and changing into clean clothes before moving out to the kitchen. Just as he was starting his coffee, Friday alerted him that the donuts had been placed in the elevator and were on their way up to his floor. Tony ran his fingers through his damp hair and padded towards the opening doors, stooping over to pick up the box of freshly made donuts. He took a deep breath as he smelled the sweetness of the pastries before straightening back up and returning to the kitchen. He set the box of donuts on the counter, turning to grab the largest mug in the cabinet. As he was pouring his coffee, he heard a loud thud from the direction of Peter’s room. Tony’s eyes widened and his heart skipped a beat. He was instantly headed toward the boy’s room, hand on his arc reactor, ready to suit up.

“I’m fine!” Peter called out softly, and he could tell from Peter’s voice that the teen had just woken up. Tony instantly breathed a sigh of relief before shaking his head and returning to the kitchen. His clumsy little hero was definitely going to make him go grey early. A few moments later, Peter appeared in the kitchen, and Tony had to bite back a chuckle. Peter’s eyes were only half open, and his curls were absolutely out of control. The boy was wearing one of the (many) pairs of Iron Man pajamas Tony had so shamelessly bought for him, and he was wrapped in a giant powder blue blanket. Tony was pretty sure the kid had never looked more adorable in his life.

 “G’mornin’, Mr. Stark.” Peter mumbled as he plopped down into one of the chairs at the table.

“Good morning, Sunshine. Wake yourself up falling out of bed?” He asked, unable to help the soft laugh that escaped his lips. Peter pouted. This kid’s cuteness might actually kill him.

“Maybe.” The teen said as he rubbed his eyes. “I dunno why I’m so sleepy this morning. Think I’mma need some of that coffee.”

“Yeah, I made that mistake once. That’s never happening again.” Tony said as he picked up the box of donuts and took it over to the table, setting it down in front of Peter. “I think some sugar will work just as well for you.” The boy perked up a bit and a big grin spread across his face as he opened the box.

“Wow! They put so many of the pink donuts with rainbow sprinkles in the box today!” Tony looked at the boy with a fond smile before patting his shoulder.

“Good, I’m glad. You want some milk for those?” Peter nodded, his curls bouncing as he stuffed a donut into his mouth. Tony grabbed the milk from the refrigerator, pouring a tall glass for the boy before returning to the table and handing it to him.

“Thank you.” Peter said as he took the milk, though the words were muffled by the food in his mouth. Tony sat down beside the teen, taking a sip of his coffee before grabbing a glazed donut from the box. The two ate in silence for a few moments until Peter had become more alert.

“Mr. Stark, why are we eating up here today? We normally eat breakfast with the others.” Tony sniffed a bit as he swallowed the food in his mouth.

“Bit of a headache this morning. Thought it might get too loud.” The boy nodded in response. With his heightened senses, Peter definitely understood that. The two of them proceeded to enjoy their donuts together, Peter telling Tony all about the new computer game that he and Ned had just discovered. Tony noticed immediately that the boy was speaking far more softly than he normally did, and he wondered what he had done to deserve the love of such a sweet kid. Toward the end of the teen’s rant, Tony’s phone rang. He glanced at the screen and held it up to show Peter that the caller was Pepper. The boy’s eyes widened comically.

“Oh, you better answer that.” Tony chuckled and did as the boy suggested, holding the phone up to his ear.

“Morning, Pep. Please tell me I didn’t forget about another meeting.” The woman laughed airily on the other end of the line.

“No, Tony. You’re not in trouble this time. I’m just calling to tell you that I need you to look over some paperwork and sign it. I’m sending it over early this afternoon, and I’d like it back no later than tomorrow.”

“Oh. Hey! Even better, why don’t we discuss it over lunch?”

“Well, there’s not really anything to discuss, Tony. I just need you to—“He wasn’t going to let her finish. The billionaire needed a good excuse to get out of the house, and not even Steve or Natasha would question his motives if he told them Pepper wanted to talk business.

“Not a problem. I’ll already be out. I’m dropping Pete off at his friend’s house later. Then you can get your paperwork back today and rest easy tonight, knowing that I haven’t fucked anything up for tomorrow.”

“ _LaNguAge_.” Peter whispered mockingly, his eyebrow raising exactly like Steve’s did. Tony snickered.

“All right, Tony. It’s a date. Meet me at that little Italian place we like. I’ll make a reservation for noon. Don’t be late; I’m pretty busy running your company today.” The woman said, and he could hear her typing on her computer as she spoke.

“I wouldn’t dream of being late for a date with my beautiful CEO.”

“Mhmm. You’d better not. See you later, Tony.” She said before hanging up. Tony breathed a sigh of relief. He never would have dreamed that he would be so excited to get out of the tower and speak Stark Industries-related business with Pepper.

_“Barnes must really be doing a number on me, huh?”_ He thought to himself. Then he shook his head a bit. Nope. He was not going there now. He was just going to pretend that the Winter Soldier was still a popsicle in one of Wakanda’s freezers.

“Mr. Stark, you okay?” Tony looked up to realize that Peter was staring at him curiously. How long had it been since Pepper hung up?

“Just peachy.” He replied with a dazzling smile. “Come on, it’s still early. Let’s play some video games before I drop you off at Ned’s.” Peter grinned and hopped up from the table.

“Yeeees! Let’s play Mario Party. I call Mario!” Peter said as he charged into the living room and grabbed the remotes before diving rather elegantly onto the couch. Tony followed, at a regular pace, sitting down on the couch as the boy handed him a remote.

“If you take Mario, who does that leave me with?” Tony asked as he stared at the TV.

“Umm…Wario?”

“Wario?” Tony asked incredulously.

“Well…you always say that you want me to be like you, but better. So that’s pretty fitting, right?” Peter grinned cheekily as Tony swatted him with a pillow.

“All right. Wario it is.”

* * *

 

After two games of Mario Party, (they each won one game; it was determined that a tie-breaker needed to be played later) the two got ready and headed down to the garage. They hopped into one of Tony’s bright red sports cars and headed to Ned’s house, loudly singing along with every song that played on the radio. After dropping Peter off, Tony went straight to the restaurant where he was meeting Pepper, arriving at 11:55. When Pepper walked into the restaurant at 11:58, she looked pleasantly surprised to see that Tony had arrived before her for once. The two proceeded to have a nice lunch together, only spending about twenty minutes actually discussing anything related to Stark Industries. After about an hour and a half, Pepper glanced down at her watch.

“Oh my gosh, it’s already 1:38!” She exclaimed.

“Well, you know what they say. Time flies when you’re having fun!” He grinned. She laughed softly which only made his smile grow larger.

“I suppose that’s true, but I’ve got to run. I have a meeting at three and there’s something I need to finish before that.” Tony unconsciously pouted.

“Aw, c’mon, Pep. You’re the boss. You could move the meeting around or something. Stay a little longer?” She stood up and straightened her skirt before picking up her purse.

“A good boss isn’t going to inconvenience her employees by changing the time of a meeting to suit her whims.” He sighed in defeat. There was no arguing that. After all, there was a reason he had made her the CEO of his company. Pepper chuckled when she saw the look on his face and then leaned over to kiss the top of his head. “Oh, stop pouting. May and I are coming to the tower for dinner with our favorite boys tomorrow night, right? I’ll see you then.” That caused Tony to perk up a bit. He had forgotten that Pepper and May would be coming for dinner the next evening.

“Yeah, okay. Have fun at your boring meeting, Madam CEO.” Pepper rolled her eyes and laughed softly, giving Tony a small wave before heading out of the restaurant. Tony flopped back in the booth and sighed. He still had three and a half hours before picking Peter back up, and he did **_not_** want to return to the tower before then. After much contemplation, he decided that a walk in the fresh air might do him some good. The billionaire called for the check and paid it, leaving a sizable tip before heading outside and putting his sunglasses back on.

He strolled casually down the street, trying to lose himself in his thoughts. Around twenty minutes later, Tony passed a comic book store. He noticed that the display in the window was of new merchandise for the game that Peter had been so excited to tell him about that morning. After staring into the window for a few moments, he headed inside the store and bought two of everything they had on display. He grinned to himself when he thought about how excited Peter and Ned would be when they got their new toys. After walking out of the store, a large bag in each hand, he glanced down at his watch. Three more hours until it was time to pick up Peter. His shoulders slumped a bit as he continued to walk down the street, lost in his thoughts.

_“Damn, I still have three hours left? What am I supposed to do for that long? I don’t want to go back to the tower alone.”_ The thought caused him to stop in his tracks for a moment, walking again only when he realized that he was blocking everyone else. _“Yikes, Tony. Are you becoming dependent on your kid? Uh, that’s something you need to nip in the bud right now… Still not going back to the tower without him though. Not today.”_ He felt his chest tighten a bit as he walked down the crowded street, and he inhaled deeply. _“Yeah, Tony, great idea. Start overthinking as you walk down one of the busiest streets in New York City. Have some well-meaning passerby call an ambulance because **Iron Man** has a panic attack while shopping on his day off. I’m sure the citizens of the world will feel **really safe** if they read **that** in the papers tomorrow.” _ The man mentally chastised himself, deciding that he needed to get away from the crowd as soon as possible. He scanned the area, noticing a large department store on the other side of the street. Tony jogged over to the intersection where people were currently crossing, just barely making it across the street before the light turned red. Heading straight into the department store, the man breathed a sigh of relief as when he saw that it wasn’t busy. _“Guess it’s time for some retail therapy.”_

 

* * *

 

Tony managed to kill a good twenty minutes in the perfume department, smelling each and every perfume until he smelled Shalimar, which he immediately recognized as the perfume that Pepper wore. He had the salesgirl set aside a bottle of it for him, along with the matching lotion and bath powder. Tony spent another fifteen minutes smelling each and every cologne he was unfamiliar with until he smelled one that reminded him of Peter. He had the salesgirl set that aside too. The kid was getting older now; Peter needed real cologne instead of that putrid Axe body spray he always wore.

Next, Tony headed to the jewelry department, where he noticed a pair of diamond stud earrings that screamed May. There was also the most delicate pearl bracelet that he knew would look wonderful on Pepper’s wrist. Happy’s suits never had any pizzazz. Since the man’s favorite color was blue, Tony found a nice pair of interesting lapis lazuli cufflinks for him. Did Peter have a watch? Tony tried to remember if he’d seen the kid wear one before, but couldn’t recall. He decided to get him one just to be safe. The billionaire scanned the selection of expensive watches, frowning as he knew the kid would hate anything flashy. Then he noticed a Rolex with a brown leather band and a simple gold face. He asked for it to be set aside with his other purchases. As he was about to leave the men’s watches and head to a different department, a Gucci watch in the display case caught his eye. He leaned closer to examine it. The face of the watch was a deep green and it was encased in gold. It might have been garish if the watch wasn’t set on a simple, black leather band, which gave it a very elegant look. Tony stared at the watch for a few moments before telling the clerk to add it to his order.

Tony spent the next hour or so walking through the department store, grabbing more things that caught his eye; a new blazer, a hat that would look amazing on Rhodey, and two pairs of the exact same sunglasses. Tony thought about how hilarious it would be if he taught Peter how to use some of that signature _Stark Sass_ _™_ and then took him out to practice it while they wore matching sunglasses.

_“God, I’ve become so lame.”_ He imagined Peter trying to be sassy and giggled to himself. _“Eh, I don’t really even care.”_ He checked his watch, pleased to see that it was about time for him to go pick up Peter. On his way to the cash register, he noticed a rather stylish leather jacket that looked as if it had been designed for Steve. He picked it up, then chewed on his bottom lip for a minute before putting the jacket back. He made a beeline for the register, trying to ignore the guilt in the back of his mind. It’s not as if Steve was expecting a new leather jacket. It was summertime anyway. He could always come back and buy it later.

After paying for his purchases and arranging for them to be delivered to the tower the following day, Tony left the store and headed back to where he had parked. Once he got back to his car, the man put the two large bags of merchandise in the back before moving to the front of the car and sliding into the driver’s seat, taking off for Ned’s house. About five minutes into the drive, Friday alerted him to a call from Peter.

“Hey, Bud.” Tony said as Friday put the call through. “What’s up?”

“Hey, Mr. Stark! Would it be okay if Ned spent the night at the tower?”

“Fine by me.” He paused for a moment. “Did you check with his mom?”

“Yeah! She said that it was okay with her if it’s okay with you!” Tony chuckled at that.

“Looks like we have a guest for the evening then. I’m on my way. Should be there in about fifteen depending on traffic.”

“Okay, thanks so much, Mr. Stark!” Peter said before hanging up the phone. Tony smiled to himself, glad that he would now get to see Ned’s reaction to all of the game loot he had picked up for the boys. Ned was just as reactive—if not more so—than Peter was. After a few minutes though, he gripped the steering wheel tightly, suddenly realizing what a horrible idea it was to invite Ned over for the evening. With Ned there, he would **_have_** to eat dinner and socialize with the other Avengers. Ned had been to the tower a few times in the past, and Tony knew how much both he and Peter loved spending time with the heroes they idolized. Tony also knew it was foolish of him to keep avoiding the others just because of the Winter Soldier. He tried to repeat the mantra that had been floating through his mind so often lately:

_“Bucky Barnes is not the Winter Soldier. He’s not the man that killed your parents._ ”

It hadn’t worked yet, but hopefully the words would find their way into his brain soon. He took a deep breath as he turned the corner to Ned’s street, a smile spreading across his face as he looked out the windshield and saw the two boys waiting for him on Ned’s front porch. The second he pulled up, Peter ran over, waving at him as if he hadn’t seen the man in weeks. Summer had just begun, but Tony already didn’t know what he would do without the kid around every day.

“Hey, Mr. Stark!” Peter said happily as he opened the car door and hopped into the front seat.

“Yeah, Hi, Mr. Stark!” Ned echoed as he climbed into the backseat, throwing his backpack and pillow down beside him.

“Hey, Kids.” Tony looked in Ned’s direction and then back at Peter, raising an eyebrow. “Peter, you did tell Ned that we have like five hundred pillows at the tower, right?”

“We do?” Peter asked, looking surprised. Tony rolled his eyes as he backed out of the driveway and started driving again. “Wait, Mr. Stark! If there are **_that many_** pillows, we should totally make a giant pillow fort!”

“Dude that would be awesome!” Ned chimed from the backseat. Tony just shrugged.

“You boys can do whatever you want as long as you put all the pillows back when you’re done.”

“YES!” They cried in unison. Tony laughed softly as he glanced at Peter. When he was Peter’s age, he was in college; showing up to his morning classes hungover—if he showed up at all. He couldn’t change his past, but he sure was glad that Peter was getting the chance to take his time growing up. That thought reminded him of what was in the back seat, and he purposefully straightened his face, his cool Tony Stark persona shining through.

“Hey, Ned.” Tony said, looking at the boy through the rearview mirror. “See those two bags back there? Could you hand one up here to Pete?” Ned looked over at them and reached out to grab one before pausing.

“Uhh, which one, sir?”

“Doesn’t matter. Same stuff is in both of them. The other one’s for you.” The boys looked at each other in surprise as Ned handed one of the large bags up to Peter. They both peeked inside the bags and Tony bit back a smile as the boys gasped simultaneously.

“NO WAY!”

“THIS IS SO COOL!”

“I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW THIS WAS RELEASED YET!” The boys dug through the bags excitedly and then both looked up at Tony.

“Thank you, Mr. Stark! You’re the best—wonderful—I can’t even begin to—“The man laughed and held up a hand as both boys started trying to thank him at the same time.

“It’s nothing. I just happened to notice a window display for the new merchandise while I was shopping earlier.”

“It’s not nothing, Mr. Stark. You’re the best.” Peter said, so much love in his voice that Tony thought his heart might explode. It was probably a good thing the man was too busy watching the road to glance over at Peter because the admiration in the boy’s doe eyes probably **_would_** have caused his heart to burst.

“Oh yeah? Can you just do one thing for me then, Pete?”

“Yeah!”

“Stop calling me, ‘Mr. Stark’. That was my father. I’m Tony.” Peter whined which caused the billionaire to smirk.

“You tricked me into this!”

“You’re the one who agreed without knowing what it was I wanted.” Tony said with a shrug.

“Dude,” Ned said, leaning forward. “If Iron Man wants you to call him by his first name, you need to call him by his first name.” Peter rolled his eyes and the man grinned.

“I knew I liked you, Kid. You can call me Tony too.”

“ ** _Really_**? Wow, cool! Thanks, Tony!”

“Ned, stop that!” Tony laughed loudly as Peter and Ned began to light-heartedly bicker about how to address him, his heart so warm that for a few moments, he was able to forget about the stressful evening that awaited him at the tower.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sooo basically this chapter was a lot of anxious Tony and Irondad goodness. It ended up being longer than I realized, which is why I split the chapter. We'll start off with Bucky next chapter.
> 
> P.S. I just want to make it clear that I am not a fan of filler content. Everything I'm writing is either central to the storyline or character development. I feel kind of bad making you guys wait so long for the more exciting scenes, but also I warned you in the tags that it was a very slow burn fic. :P


	7. Chapter 7

Bucky had spent the entire morning alone in his room, partly to calm down from yet another nightmare, and partly to avoid running into a certain billionaire. It was around eleven-thirty before he heard a knock on his door. Bucky groaned loudly in response. Steve laughed from the other side of the door.

“Buck, can I come in?”

“Yeah.” The door opened and Steve walked in, sitting at the foot of the bed.

“How’re you feeling this morning?

“Pretty good.” Bucky lied. “Just a bit tired, I guess.”

“That’s fair. It’s a long trip from Wakanda to New York.” Steve pat his friend’s leg, and the simple gesture caused Bucky to realize how touch starved he was—though he wasn’t about to tell Steve that; even if his friend would wrap him up in a giant bear hug.

“Too long…” The man thought about how he would like to take a walk around the city to reminisce, but the idea of being around so many people made him a bit sick to his stomach.

“Well,” Steve stood up, removing his hand from the other man’s leg. “Why don’t we go downstairs? You can get to know some of the others. Besides, you need to eat.” Bucky hesitated, and Steve gave him a questioning look.

“All right, Stevie.” Bucky said with a sigh as he forced himself to get out of bed. “But only because I know you’ll pester me to death if I don’t get up and eat something.”

“You know me well, Bucky.” The Captain said with a grin, putting his arm around his friend as he led him to the elevator. Bucky may have leaned a bit too much into Steve’s touch, but neither of them mentioned it as they made their way down to the lounge.

When they entered the common area, Bucky had been relieved to see that Tony was nowhere in sight. In fact, it seemed as if most of the Avengers were out for the day. It was just him, Steve, and the two Asgardians. Bucky instantly took a liking to Thor; the large god was so kind and cheerful that he really put the former assassin at ease. The same could not be said for Thor’s brother; Bucky found Loki to be extremely intimidating. The god had a voice like pure silk and he was charming as hell, but the way he looked at Bucky—as if staring through his soul—was borderline terrifying.

The four had been chatting for over an hour when a second Loki suddenly appeared next to Bucky, a coffee pot in his hand.

“Care for more coffee, Sergeant?”

“ ** _What the hell?_** ” Bucky shouted as he fell backward in his seat, looking between the two Lokis with widened eyes. He definitely would have ended up on the floor had Steve not caught the back of his chair.

“Loki!” Thor reprimanded, and the prince’s expression suddenly turned to that of a hurt child.

“I’m terribly sorry. I didn’t mean to frighten you.” He said, voice falling to a whisper as he turned to Thor. “I was trying to be helpful…” Thor’s face softened and he shook his head slightly, patting his brother on the back.

“Bucky, you okay?” Steve asked, and the man nodded in response, suddenly feeling foolish as both Steve and Thor had seemed completely unfazed by the second Loki’s appearance.

“Loki is quite a powerful magician.” Thor explained, a hint of pride in his voice. “Unfortunately, he seems often to forget that most people on Earth are unaccustomed to such sights.” Thor raised an eyebrow at his brother who looked away, a guilty expression on his face.

“It’s fine, really. Just wasn’t expecting it, that’s all. You spooked me.” Bucky said as he forced a chuckle. Once content that his friend was fine, Steve turned back to Thor, the two picking up their conversation where they had left off. Bucky realized that he was still leaning into Steve’s side, but as he moved to reposition himself, he noticed that the innocent expression on the prince’s face had been replaced by an amused smirk. It only took the man a moment to realize that Loki had scared him on purpose and that all three of the men had been fooled by Loki’s act of innocence. Bucky’s eyes widened when he realized this, which caused the mischievous god to chuckle softly. Bucky decided that as long as Steve wasn’t saying anything, he would just stay a bit closer to him for the time being.

* * *

 

It was late afternoon by the time the other Avengers began to trickle in to join them. When Sam plopped down beside Bucky with the intention of annoying him, the super soldier was secretly grateful that the Falcon was now blocking him from Loki, should the mischievous god attempt any more tricks.

Bucky felt fairly at ease listening to the others’ conversation until Sam looked down at his phone for a second.

“Yo, Spiderkid wants to know what we’re ordering for dinner.” Sam said, interrupting the conversation. Steve glanced down at his watch.

“It is really that late already?” The Captain asked in surprised.

“It’s almost five.” Natasha replied. “By the time we actually order food and have it delivered, it will be six at least.”

“Well, if no one else has any ideas, I would quite like to have more of that delightful orange chicken Peter had me try last time I was here.” Thor suggested, his eyes sparkling with a childlike excitement. Even if someone did have a different idea, they’d never say it now; Thor looked too excited to disappoint.

“Fine by me.” Wanda said, only sparing a brief glance up from her phone.

“Yeah, Chinese sounds good.” Bruce agreed. A few moments later, take out menus were being passed around, and Steve began to write down everyone’s orders.

“Sam, did Peter reply?” Steve asked a few minutes later, and the other man glanced down at his phone.

“Uh…yeah. Looks like a Kung Pao chicken for Tony and four orders of orange chicken.”

“Geez, the kid must be extra hungry tonight.” Natasha said with a laugh. Sam shook his head.

“Nah, Ned’s sleeping over.” Bucky, who had been silently observing, opened his mouth to speak.

“Who’s Ned?”

“It’s Peter’s best friend. Great kid. You’ll like him.” Steve said with a smile.

“You just like him because he’s actually obsessed with you.” Sam said and Steve shook his head.

“What are you talking about? Ned is just—“ Steve was interrupted by Natasha.

“Save it, Steve. The kid’s in love with you. No point in denying it.” The woman said, an amused look on her face.

“Yeah, but Ned hasn’t met Thor yet.” Wanda said, also giving Steve an amused look. "We’ll see how much attention **_Captain America_** gets tonight.” Steve chuckled good-naturedly with the others while Thor looked pleased. Bucky wondered for a moment if his presence might scare the kid, and he leaned closer to his friend.

“Hey, Steve…you think it’s okay if I stay here? I mean…I’m not going to scare the kid, am I?” He asked in a low voice, part of him hoping that Steve sent him away so that he would have a good excuse to avoid seeing Tony.

“Trust me. He won’t be scared of you. Don’t worry so much. Everything will be fine.” Bucky nodded and sat back against the chair, hoping that his friend was right. He would really hate to scare a kid.

It was about thirty minutes later when the long-haired super soldier heard the elevator doors open, and he turned to see Tony, Peter, and the boy he assumed to be Ned walk out onto the floor.

“Hey, everyone!” Peter greeted cheerily as he walked into the room. “Ned’s gonna spend the night!”

“Sam told us. Good to see you again, Ned.” Natasha greeted with a warm smile. Ned looked at her with a grin and bowed his head shyly.

“Thanks, Miss Romanoff.”

“Oh, Thor!” Peter exclaimed, grabbing his friend by the arm and practically dragging him over to the god. “Thor, this is Ned!”

“Ah, yes. Peter’s “guy in the chair”. It’s good to finally meet you, Ned!” Thor said as he reached out to shake Ned’s hand. Ned shook his hand, staring at the god with wide, sparkling eyes before turning to Peter.

“Dude, you’re right. He is even more handsome in person!”

“ ** _NED_**!” Peter hissed through his teeth, looking mortified. Everyone laughed as they watched the interaction, but Bucky, who had been watching Tony out of the corner of his eye, was caught off-guard by the man’s incredibly soft laugh. Daring to steal a proper glance at the other man, Bucky was surprised at how gentle and kind Tony looked. He had never seen Tony look that way before. Guilt flooded his entire being as he realized that he had done something so terrible that even a man with such warmth in his eyes could not forgive him. He looked away quickly, feeling sick to his stomach. Peter chose that moment to introduce him to Ned.

“Ned, this is Sergeant Barnes!” Peter said, and Bucky was shocked to see that the boy looked just as excited to meet him as he had been to meet Thor.

“Wow, it’s an honor, Sir!” Ned said, reaching out to shake Bucky’s hand. The man managed a small smile as he returned the gesture with a firm grip. Ned stared at the man’s other arm, looking excited. “Dude…your arm is awesome.”

“Thanks.” He said, looking down at his Vibranium arm. “My best girl made it for me.” Peter and Ned looked at each other in surprise before they looked back at the Sergeant.

“Who’s that, sir?” Ned asked curiously. Bucky softened a bit as he thought of Shuri.

“Shuri. She’s the princess of Wakanda.” Peter and Ned’s mouths dropped open.

“ ** _You know the princess of Wakanda?_** ”

“ ** _A real princess made that arm?_** ”

“ ** _Oh my gosh, isn’t she like our age? How can she do such cool stuff?_** ” The boys bombarded Bucky with questions and he laughed.

“She’s a real doll. Smart as a whip too. You should see the things she can make. I bet you boys would love her lab.” The man started, instantly feeling more comfortable as he spoke about his adopted sister. That is, until he caught a glimpse of Tony behind the boys. The warmth was completely gone from the other man’s eyes. His jaw was clenched tightly, and he was squeezing his left wrist in a manner that appeared quite menacing to Bucky. The feeling of guilt consumed him again, and he faltered. Luckily, Friday chose that moment to interrupt, saying that the food had arrived and the delivery boy was in the lobby.

“I’ll go get it.” Steve said as he stood up from the couch. Bucky immediately stood up beside him.

“I’ll help. It’s a lot of food to carry.” He mumbled, aware of Tony watching him.

“Thanks, Bucky. We’ll be right back.” Steve said as he followed Bucky, who was eagerly walking ahead of him to the elevator. The moment they stepped inside, the lift began to move downward and Steve turned to look at his friend. “You okay there?”

“Huh?” The sergeant looked up at him for a moment before nodding. “Yeah, I’m fine.” Steve raised an eyebrow but didn’t say anything else during the short ride to the first floor of the tower. When the doors opened, Steve and Bucky strolled out and up to the delivery boy who looked completely star struck.

“Wow, Captain America. It’s a real honor, Sir.” Steve chuckled softly.

“Nice to meet you too, Son.” Steve said as he reached over to pat Bucky’s shoulder. “This is my good friend, Sergeant Bucky Barnes.” Bucky could have sworn that the kid’s eyes widened further—if that was even possible.

“Wow, Sergeant Barnes. I actually wrote an essay about you in school last year.” Now it was Bucky’s turn to look surprised. “Yeah, you’re a real hero. I can’t wait to tell my friends I met you!” Bucky didn’t know what to say, so he just looked at Steve. Steve laughed softly and turned back at the boy.

“So, how much will it be?” He asked as he pulled out a credit card.

“Uh, it looks like it’s going to be one hundred twenty-one dollars and sixty-three cents.” Bucky’s eyes widened. That had to be wrong. He looked at Steve who handed over the card without batting an eye. The boy swiped it in his portable scanner before handing the card back to Steve. Bucky noticed that the card had Tony’s name on it. Odd. A moment later, the receipt printed out of the small machine and the boy handed it to the Captain who added a generous tip before signing it.

As the two men carried the food back to the elevator, Bucky looked at Steve. “Uh…Steve? How was this food **_that_** expensive?” Steve looked confused for a moment before laughing softly.

“Inflation, Buck. Prices are a lot different than they were seventy years ago.” Bucky nodded slightly. It made sense, though it still seemed preposterous to him. The amount of money they spent on this one dinner could have bought the Avengers an entire month’s worth of dinner back in the 40s.

“And that credit card… I learned about those when I was catching up in Wakanda, but…why does it have Tony’s name on it?”

“Oh. Tony gave us all cards to use. He said it’s easier that way.” Bucky blinked a few times but said nothing in response. A few moments later, they were back in the lounge, met at the elevator doors by Ned and Peter, who insisted that Steve and Bucky sit down while they hand the food out to everyone. Bucky gratefully handed a bag off to Ned, making a beeline for the couch that was furthest from where Tony sat. Everyone around the former assassin was buzzing happily as the boys passed the food out, but all Bucky wanted to do was go back to his room and never leave. When Peter handed Bucky the carton of black pepper chicken that Steve had ordered for him, the man managed a small smile as he took it. The Avengers began to eat, laughing and enjoying one another’s company as they did so. However, Bucky couldn’t seem to swallow more than a few bites of his meal, spending most of his time pushing the food in his container around as he half-listened to the conversations happening around him.

Before he realized it, the others had finished eating and were throwing their now-empty containers away. Steve held out his hand towards Bucky.

“You finished? I’ll throw it away for you.” He said, and Bucky immediately shook his head as he closed the lid on the container, not wanting Steve to see how little he had eaten.

“I couldn’t finish it tonight… still a bit tired from all that traveling, I guess.” He said as he quickly stood up. “I’ll just keep it in the refrigerator.” Steve nodded in response as Bucky hurried off to the kitchen. Just as he was opening the door to the refrigerator, Peter came stomping into the kitchen, huffing slightly.

“You okay, kid?” Bucky asked as he set his food into the fridge.

“Yeah, Mr. Stark just hardly touched his food. He says it’s because he ate a big lunch with Miss Potts, but I still wish he’d eat his dinner.” Peter moved beside the super soldier, setting another takeout container into the refrigerator. “He probably won’t eat it, but I’m not letting him throw it away!” Bucky tilted his head a bit as he looked at the kid.

“You call him Mr. Stark?”

“I mean… that’s his name.” The boy said, blinking in confusion.

“I just thought… He’s not your dad?” Now it was Bucky’s turn to look confused. He had genuinely thought Peter was Tony’s son.

“No! He’s not my dad… I mean we joke about it and stuff, and you’re not the first person to think that either, but… he’s just…” Peter’s cheeks were flushed as he stumbled over his words. “Um…my mentor?” Even Peter couldn’t think of a more accurate way to describe their relationship other than father and son, though he wouldn’t admit it—at least not unless Tony did first.

“Oh…sorry.” Bucky said awkwardly, unsure of what else to say.

“It’s okay, Sergeant Barnes.” Peter grinned up at him before bouncing out of the kitchen. Bucky followed behind a few moments later, wondering if he could just go to bed yet.

“Bucky, come here!” Steve called out, and the man groaned internally as he moved back to where his friend was sitting. “The boys want to watch a movie.”

“Star Wars! Thor’s never seen it!” Peter said as if he were scandalized.

“We have to start with A New Hope, **_obviously_**.” Ned said as he plopped back down onto the couch next to Peter. Tony coughed.

“ ** _Nerds._** ” Tony said as he coughed again, then proceeded to start laughing as Peter smacked him with a pillow.

_“His eyes are warm again.”_ Bucky thought as he watched the scene. A moment later, the lights dimmed as Sam put the requested movie on the large TV. The super soldier had seen plenty of large televisions in Wakanda, but it was still shocking to him that people essentially had movie theatres in their homes now. The world sure had changed a lot in seventy years. Once the room was dark, Bucky pressed closer into Steve’s side, and he felt Steve wrap his arm around him. He sighed softly, letting the reassuring touch of his best friend ground him. He watched the beginning of the movie in awe, amazed by the special effects in the film. After a few moments, however, he let his eyes drift over towards Tony. He noticed that Peter’s back was pressed up against the man, and Tony had his fingers in the boy’s curls, playing with them absent-mindedly. They sure looked like father and son. Peter seemed to live at the tower with Tony as well. Perhaps he was an orphan, but the adoption wasn’t official yet. Bucky was curious but thought it wise not to ask more about what may be a touchy subject. He turned his eyes back to the screen for a few minutes before letting his eyes wander back to Tony once more. The billionaire seemed so content with the kid. Peter seemed to be about the age Tony was when his parents died. He suddenly thought about how Tony and Howard must have shared similar interactions, and how devastated Tony must have been upon finding out of his parents’ deaths. His stomach churned at the thought, and he turned his eyes back to the screen, once again trying to focus on the movie before him.

At one point in the film, Darth Vader appeared on the screen, lifting his large arm and using something called “the force” to choke another man. Bucky watched in horror as the man on the screen convulsed and made the most wretched choking sounds; sounds that the Winter Soldier had heard many times as his metal hand stole the life from his victims. As Bucky heard the choking sounds, images of people the Soldier had killed flashed through his mind, and he could almost hear their final pleas for mercy once more. His chest tightened and before he knew it, he was choking back a sob as he ran from the floor and into the elevator.

“My floor, Miss Friday.” He gasped, tears streaming down his face. The elevator doors shut right as Bucky saw Steve about to get into the car with him. He breathed a slight sigh of relief as he wiped at his tears. He didn’t need someone as perfect as Steve around while he was remembering what a failure he was. The second the elevator doors opened onto the floor he shared with Steve, he bolted for his room, locking the door behind him. 

“Miss Friday, please don’t let anyone come in here. You can do that, right?” He asked, tears flowing freely down his cheeks.

“Yes, Sergeant. No one will be allowed into your room.”

“Thank you.” He said softly, his voice cracking slightly as he buried his face into his pillow, ignoring the knocking on his door that started a few minutes later.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Bucky had a rough first day back in America, and Steve really doesn't grasp that Bucky is going through major PTSD. Unfortunately, things will probably get a bit worse for the former assassin before things start to look up...
> 
> Let me know what you guys thought of the chapter. I love hearing your comments/predictions for what you think will happen next.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love your reactions to this story, and it makes me happy that so many of you are enjoying it. Soooo...here's another chapter ♥

Bucky woke up the next morning with a pounding headache. He hated crying himself to sleep. The man contemplated never leaving his bed, just staying in that spot until he finally died. However, that didn’t seem realistic as he knew Steve would find a way to break into is room before ever letting that happen. He continued to lie in his bed for several more minutes before slowly dragging himself up and into his bathroom. Bucky shed his clothes and turned the shower on, letting the water warm up before stepping inside. He didn’t move to wash his hair or body. Instead, the man sat on the floor of the shower, curling himself up into a ball as he let the hot water pour over him. He had no idea how much time passed as he sat in the shower, the warmth of the water soothing him like a long hug. It was quite some time later before he was finally able to stand up and wash himself.

Once finished with his shower, he stepped out and dried himself off before finding a pair of black sweatpants and an extremely soft, grey sweatshirt. He couldn’t remember the last time he had worn anything so soft and warm. Bucky moved back to his bed, curling up in it once again as he looked at the picture of Shuri and himself that was currently propped up against the lamp on his bedside table. The man sighed softly as he hugged a pillow. He had only been in New York for one full day, but already he missed the people of Wakanda terribly.

_“Should I just go back?”_ He thought to himself. _“I know the Wakandans would welcome me back happily. I miss them. I especially miss the Queen Mother and T’Challa and Shuri…but this is my home, right? Steve’s here…Steve.”_ Suddenly Bucky wanted to see the other man. He found himself constantly wavering between wanting to cling to his best friend and wanting to stay far away from him. Steve was the epitome of a hero, and Bucky knew that he was the villain. He didn’t understand why people kept calling him a hero. Clearly, everyone was unaware of everything that he had done as the Winter Soldier. The man hugged his pillow tighter, burying his face in it for several moments before finally deciding to start his day. With a glance at the clock, he noticed that it was nearly 10 AM. He hoped everyone else would be out doing things. Bucky didn’t want to see anybody.

The man wandered from his room and into the elevator, asking Friday to take him into the lounge. Once the doors opened, he stepped out onto the floor and wandered towards the kitchen, pausing cautiously as he heard Steve’s angry voice.

“Are you sure that you didn’t say anything to Bucky? He wouldn’t just get upset and run off for no reason.”

“And when exactly would I have had time to say anything to him? Did you see me say even a single word to him?” He recognized Tony Stark’s voice. The billionaire sounded angry too.

“No, I didn’t see you say anything to him, but that doesn’t mean you didn’t say or do something to him. It’s just very unlike him to act this way.”

“You haven’t even been around the guy in seventy years, and you still think you know everything about him?” Tony asked incredulously. Bucky had to give the man points for that, Steve really didn’t know everything about him—not anymore.

“Uh, yeah, I think I do. So why don’t you stop avoiding the question and just give me a straight answer?” Steve hissed, and Bucky bit his bottom lip. Great, now Tony would hate him even more. As if that were possible.

“Tell me, **_Cap_**.” Tony spit out the man’s moniker. “Are you sure you didn’t suffer any brain damage after spending seventy years on ice? I haven’t even said a word to your **_precious Bucky_** , let alone done something to make him upset. You’ve been with him constantly, how could I have even had the time?”

“Calm down, Tony.” Steve warned.

“Calm down? I **_am_** calm. You want me to get loud? I will **_get_** loud. I **_will_** get loud if you want me to get loud.” Tony threatened, and Bucky could feel the tension from the other room.

“Tony,” Bucky heard Natasha’s voice next. “You don’t have a great track record with Barnes. You can’t blame Steve for thinking something was up.” There was silence for several moments before Bucky heard Tony start to speak heatedly. The man wanted nothing more than to turn around and go straight back to his room. Suddenly the elevator doors behind him opened and Peter and Ned came out, laughing loudly as they stared at the phone Ned was holding. The argument in the other room stopped immediately.

“Hey, Sergeant Barnes. Have you eaten breakfast yet?” Ned asked as he spotted Bucky. The man wanted to slam his head into the wall. What horrible timing.

“No, not yet…You guys just waking up?” He asked, his usually charming self far too distracted to think of any better conversation topics.

“Yep. We were up really late playing a game.” Peter said before frowning at the other man. “Are you okay? You kinda ran out during Star Wars last night.” The boy looked concerned. Bucky felt guilty again. No kid should feel concerned about his well-being.

“I’m fine kid…think the Chinese food didn’t agree with me. It’s been years since I’ve had it.” He said, and Peter seemed to buy his excuse.

“Ohh. Say no more. Last week I ate an entire tub of ice cream and I felt so sick. I totally get it.” Peter said. Bucky didn’t quite see the correlation, but he nodded anyway.

“Is anyone else down here?” Ned asked as he walked toward the kitchen and Steve took that as his cue to step out in the living area.

“Morning, boys.” His eyes lit up a bit as he noticed his friend. “Feeling okay, Bucky?” He asked, concern filling his eyes.

“As I told the boys here, the Chinese food just didn’t agree with me.” Bucky repeated. The boys had believed it—maybe Steve would too. Judging by the skeptical expression on his friend’s face, he supposed he wasn’t so lucky. The boys went ahead to the kitchen, but Steve hung back.

“Sure you’re okay?” Steve asked as he slung an arm around the other man, his blue eyes serious. Bucky allowed himself to enjoy the warmth of his friend’s arm for a brief moment before shrugging out of Steve’s grip. Something about the way that Steve had so maliciously accused Tony of harming him bothered Bucky. Shouldn’t Steve be more worried about Tony? After all, Tony was the one who was living with his parents’ killer. Bucky was pretty sure that Tony **_was_** planning on harming him eventually, but that didn’t matter anymore. After seeing the difference in the way that Tony looked at him opposed to the way he looked at the others, Bucky felt he deserved whatever it was that Tony had in store for him. The billionaire seemed to be a very caring person. He looked kind, he took care of Peter, he had even given the others those credit cards, Bucky was also pretty sure that Tony owned the massive tower where everyone lived. He wondered exactly what had happened between the two men for Steve to so easily blame Tony after everything the other man seemed to be doing for Steve.

“I’m fine.” He said as he walked ahead of Steve and into the kitchen. As he entered, he saw Tony laughing at something Ned was saying, but he noticed that the smile didn’t quite reach the other man’s eyes. Guilt gnawed at Bucky’s stomach. He turned to leave, not only because he was a bit scared of Tony, but also because he felt bad about being in the man’s house. However, his fast exit was blocked by the appearance of Sam, Thor, Loki, and Bruce, who all decided to stand in the doorway as they said good morning to everyone else.

“Hey, Sergeant Barnes! Come sit by me!” Ned shouted. Bucky cursed silently. He couldn’t brush a kid off; especially not one as sweet as Ned. He trudged over and sat next to the kid, Steve following to sit on the other side of Bucky. Natasha was putting food on the table; it being her turn to make breakfast for the others. Everyone began talking, eating, and laughing just as they had done the night before. Bucky envied them all. The days where he was able to smile in such a carefree manner were but a distant memory. After a few moments had passed, Ned turned to look at the older man.

“Hey, Sergeant Barnes? Would you mind telling me about Wakanda? That place is legendary! Is the technology really as advanced as everyone says?” Ned asked, and the mention of Wakanda caused Bucky to relax a bit.

“Oh, yeah. I mean…what you guys have here seems so advanced to me. But the technology there really is incredible. And the views. I mean, wow. I’ve never seen anything prettier in my life.” He lost himself for a moment, not even realizing that he had begun to gush about Wakanda. Ned listened with great interest, and soon Peter and some of the others began to listen to Bucky as well. Once he realized that everyone had started listening to him, the man ended his description of the distant country as quickly as possible. He did not want to be the center of attention any longer than necessary.

After he had finished speaking, Bucky began to eat his food quickly. He probably appeared to be hungry to everyone else, but in reality, he was trying to force as much food down his throat as he could before his body started rejecting it. The last thing he wanted to hear was Steve’s nagging. Trying not to get lost in the darkness of his own mind, Bucky tried to focus on the others’ conversation.

“You guys think you’re so good at video games, but I would totally crush you if we ever played the classics like Xevious or Donkey Kong.” Sam said. Bucky turned just in time to see Peter roll his eyes.

“What are you talking about? I mean, sure, classic games require some skill, but if you have good timing you’ll be fine. New games require so many more skills in addition to that.” Peter argued, and Ned felt the need to back his friend up.

“You’re just mad because you can’t beat Peter at Mario Kart.” Sam sputtered and the others laughed as Peter and Ned shared a high five.

“When is Clint coming back?” Sam asked as he looked at Natasha. “I’d like to see him drive laps around the Spiderkid. Only one who can always beat him.” The man grumbled and Natasha rolled her eyes.

“His kids are on summer vacation. Pretty sure he’s having more fun spending time with them than he would be beating Peter at Mario Kart for ** _your_** enjoyment.” The others began to laugh again and Bucky turned to Ned, speaking softly.

“Hey, what’s Mario Kart?”

“Oh. My. God. Peter! Sergeant Barnes doesn’t know what Mario Kart is!” The kid said loudly—so much for Bucky being discreet.

“Wait…Sergeant Barnes, do you even know what video games are?” Peter asked with a dramatic gasp.

“I have heard a bit about ‘em. Never actually seen one though.” Bucky admitted.

“Come on! You’re done eating, right?” Peter asked excitedly. “Ned, you explain it to him while I go get it set up on the TV!” He exclaimed before charging into the adjacent living room. Ned began to speak quickly, saying a lot of things that Bucky didn’t understand such as “Koopa Shell” and “Bullet Bill”. The man felt as if his head were spinning, but he smiled at how excited the boy was to explain the game to him. A few moments later, Ned was interrupted by Peter’s shouting from the other room.

“Guys, C’mon!” Ned got up eagerly, and Bucky did the same, following the boy into the other room. Peter handed Ned and Bucky controllers before holding up another one.

“Anyone else want to play?” Peter asked as some of the other heroes left the kitchen to join them.

“I will!” Thor said as he took the final remote. “I want to play as that funny little mushroom fellow.”

“Toad!” Peter and Ned exclaimed in exasperation. A few seconds later, Peter started the game setup, selecting Mario for himself. Ned chose Luigi while Thor, of course, chose Toad. After Ned showed him how to use the remote, Bucky looked at the brightly colored characters on the screen before choosing Bowser.

“An excellent choice!” Peter said with a grin. As the boys were reviewing how to use the remote, Bucky noticed that Tony was staring in his direction. Though it only lasted for about thirty seconds before the man moved quickly into the elevator, Bucky felt his breakfast threatening to come back up.

“Any questions?” Ned asked, and Bucky realized he hadn’t heard a single word of the boys’ instructions.

“Uh, yeah. I think I got it.” He lied. He’d figure it out as he played. If he couldn’t, Bucky would blame it on his old age. That would probably work. Just as the countdown for the race was beginning, Loki moved to sit between him and Peter. That would have been bad enough in a normal seating arrangement, but Bucky was on the end of the couch and Peter was on the middle cushion. Bucky opened his mouth to protest, wanting to tell the god to move to the empty couch cushion on the other side of Peter, or better yet, one of the two couches that were currently empty. Peter didn’t seem to find anything strange about the situation, moving to lean against Loki as the tall prince crossed his legs and put an arm around the boy. Loki turned to give him an icy glare, and Bucky’s eyes widened.

“Sergeant Barnes, we started! Go, go, go!” Peter shouted, causing Bucky to turn his attention back to the screen. He tried to figure out the game, but it was extremely difficult to concentrate with the tall Asgardian a mere six inches away. Bucky had far too many things on his mind to care about playing Mario Kart, but he didn’t want to disappoint the boys; they were the only two who truly put him at ease aside from Steve and Thor. Bucky took a deep breath and looked back at the screen, trying to ignore Loki’s stare.

“Okay, boys. Let me try that again.”

 

* * *

 

The boys had been showing Bucky different video games all day long, and Peter was happy when he noticed that the older man had started to smile more. He wasn’t sure if it was because the Sergeant had more fun as he began to understand the games, or if the man was just beginning to feel more comfortable at the tower. Either way, Peter was glad. He liked seeing Bucky’s smile and hearing his soft, deep voice—even if the older man didn’t speak much.

After several hours, Ned’s phone vibrated. The boy picked it up and groaned. Peter looked over at his friend.

“Your mom?”

“Yeah, she says she wants me to come home.” The boy said disappointedly. “We didn’t even have time to make that giant pillow fort!”

“Don’t worry, we have all summer!” Peter said with a laugh. Ned perked up at that.

“I guess you’re right. Hey, where’s Tony? I want to thank him again for all the cool stuff he got us.”

“Probably in his lab. He’s been down there a lot lately. I’ll tell him you said ‘thank you’ again.“ Peter said, knowing that Tony let very few people into his workspace without warning. “And don’t call him that!”

“What? He said to call him ‘Tony’.”

“Yeah, but I don’t even call him that!”

“He wants you to call him that though.” Ned said with a shrug. Peter huffed.

“I was thinking of going out for a bit.” Steve interrupted with a chuckle. “Why don’t I take you home, Ned?” Ned’s eyes widened with excitement.

“Wow! I mean, that would be great, Captain Rogers, Sir. I mean… if it’s not out of your way.” Ned stammered over his words and Peter rolled his eyes. The Captain laughed.

“Not at all. Go get your stuff and meet me in the garage, okay?” Ned nodded and took off for the elevator. “See ya, Peter. I’ll text you tonight!”

“Bye, Ned!” Peter said with a laugh, but he frowned a bit as he noticed the smile was gone from the Sergeant’s face.

“You’re going out, Steve?” The man almost sounded scared. Peter tilted his head as he watched.

“Just for a bit, Buck. New York sure has changed a lot since we were young…but remember that bakery we loved so much?” Bucky paused for a moment.

“Caputo’s?”

“That’s the one.” Steve said, looking pleased that his friend remembered. “It’s still there, and everything tastes just as delicious as it did seventy years ago. I wasn’t sure you’d feel up to going out so I was going to pick up some things. Do you want to come with me?” Steve tilted his head towards his friend and Peter watched as the Sergeant nodded vigorously.

“Great, let’s head down to the garage then.” He said, and Peter straightened up from Loki’s side.

“Thanks for taking Ned home, Captain Rogers!” Peter said cheerily and the man smiled.

“No problem, Son.” He turned to his friend. “C’mon, Bucky.” He said, leading the other man toward the elevator. Peter turned back to Loki.

“I’m surprised you watched us for so long! Think you’re starting to get interested in video games?” Peter teased and Loki looked unamused.

“Hardly.” The god replied. “I just didn’t have anywhere better to be today. It was really nothing more than a lack of boredom.”

“You could take a nap like your brother.” Peter said with a laugh as he nodded toward the God of Thunder who was curled up on one of the other couches, fast asleep.

“Naps are for children.” Loki said dismissively.

“Hey, I ** _love_** naps!”

“My point exactly.” Peter stuck his tongue out at Loki who failed at hiding an amused smile.

“Well, I’m going to go see what Mr. Stark’s doing in his lab. Don’t miss me too much!” Peter said as he hopped up and strolled over to the elevator. Loki rolled his eyes.

“Oh no, whatever shall I do without a loud child clinging to me?” the Asgardian asked sarcastically.

“Haha. Very funny.” Peter said as the doors to the elevator opened. “You’re still going to tell me about how your mom taught you magic tomorrow, right?” Peter asked, making sure that Loki wasn’t actually annoyed by him. A soft smile flickered over the god’s lips.

“I wouldn’t dream of doing anything else.” Peter smiled at the response as he stepped into the lift. The boy turned around as the doors were closing, just in time to see Loki covering Thor with a blanket. Peter snickered once the doors were shut. He wondered why Loki tried to hide the fact that he cared for his older brother so much. He was horrible at hiding it; the god might as well just be open about it. That thought was at the front of his mind as he walked into Tony’s lab.

“Hey, Mr. Stark! I was just thinking…Do you know why—? Peter cut himself off as he saw his mentor sitting on a stool, face down on his workbench.

“Geez, naptime for all the adults today.” He mumbled softly to himself as he walked over to the couch in the corner of the lab, grabbing a pillow and a blanket. As he approached Tony, he noticed that there was a nearly empty glass of liquor next to his half-drunken cup of coffee. Peter moved them with a sigh before draping the blanket around his mentor’s shoulders. As he lifted the man’s head gently to place a pillow beneath it, he noticed a file and some papers under Tony’s head. Peter picked them up to set them aside, but when the boy’s eyes fell onto the tear-stained papers, a soft gasp escaped his lips. The boy threw the pillow back to the couch, shuffling through the papers with widened eyes.

The file was labeled “December 16th, 1991”. He had seen newspaper clippings about the Stark’s fatal car accident before. What Peter really found shocking were the grainy pictures of the Winter Soldier kneeling beside the Stark’s car with hard, steely eyes. The boy suddenly felt sick to his stomach. Not wanting to see anything else, he slid the papers back underneath Tony’s cheek, quickly running to the elevator before the man could wake up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: It took me so long to proofread this because I couldn't get past Steve and Tony's fight without laughing. For some reason, the line:  
> “Calm down? I am calm. You want me to get loud? I will get loud. I will get loud if you want me to get loud.” popped into my head as I was writing the fight scene. This line is one of RDJ's lines from the movie "Heart and Souls" (which you 100% need to watch if you have never seen it-it's one of my favorite movies). Basically, his character ends up getting possessed by four different ghosts throughout the movie; he is possessed by the ghost of a sassy black woman when he says that line. 
> 
> If you need a laugh and/or a feel-good moment, just stop reading fanfiction for 104 minutes and go watch that movie. You can thank me later.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is pretty short, but by no means uneventful. Hope you enjoy it!

Steve glanced at Bucky as he pulled away from Ned’s house and sped down the road. The two men rode in silence for several minutes before the Captain glanced at his friend.

“Okay, Bucky. What’s wrong?” He asked, and the Sergeant turned in his seat to face Steve.

“What makes you think something’s wrong?”

“You barely said a word since we left the tower. In fact, you’ve been very quiet since you arrived back in New York.”

“Just tired.”

“You slept for twelve hours last night…that’s not like you.”

“Yeah, and you know everything about me considering all the time we’ve spent together the past few decades, huh?” Bucky asked, his voice dripping with sarcasm. The captain looked at his friend in surprise.

“Buck…”

“Don’t ‘Buck’ me, Steve. Why did you bring me here to live in a house with Tony Stark of all people? You know our history!”

“Did Tony do something to you? I knew he was up to something when you ran out of—“Steve was cut off by Bucky angrily throwing his hands up in the air.

“No! Stark didn’t do a damn thing to me! Even if he **_did_** do something to hurt me, could you blame him? I killed his fucking parents!”

“Hey, that wasn’t you.” Steve said, his voice irritatingly soft.

“Like it or not, it was me.”

“You didn’t choose that, Bucky.”

“That doesn’t matter. It was still **_my_** hands that killed them. **_I_** took their lives!” Bucky shouted, unable to control the tears that sprang into his eyes. Steve glanced at Bucky, and upon seeing the distress on his face, immediately pulled over to the side of the road. The Captain yanked off his seatbelt in order to gather the other man into his arms. Sobbing violently, Bucky struggled to unfasten his own seatbelt, collapsing against Steve’s chest once he was free. The blond began rubbing the other man’s back, trying to calm him down.

“Listen to me. That wasn’t you. Hydra used you. They tortured you, brainwashed you, and forced you to do things against your will. You’re a victim here, okay? You can’t be held accountable for something you had no control over.” Steve said, determination in his voice. Bucky just shook his head against the man’s chest, not believing a word of it. For once, Steve knew not to push it, and he silently held his friend for nearly thirty minutes before Bucky’s sobs began to die down.

“I wouldn’t lie to you, Buck. You know that, right?” Steve asked. Bucky nodded slightly, never wanting to leave the warmth of his friend’s embrace.

“You know you can talk to me, right?”

“…I know I can.” Bucky said, his voice hoarse.

“Good. You ready to go, or you want to stay here a bit longer?” Bucky wanted nothing more than to stay clinging to his friend for the rest of the day, but he knew he didn’t deserve the comfort Steve was offering. He also felt incredibly embarrassed. Bucky was sure that Steve had never done a damn thing wrong in his entire life. Steve didn’t deserve such a terrible best friend. Fear gripped the man as he suddenly wondered what his friend would do the day he realized he was too honorable for someone as corrupt as Bucky. Bucky swallowed hard, willing those thoughts away.

“Let’s go. I want to see the bakery.” He said, moving away from Steve as he re-fastened his seatbelt. The blond smiled a bit as he put on his own seatbelt, starting up the car’s engine as he took off for the bakery.

* * *

 

Tony woke up in his lab late that afternoon, groaning in pain as he stood up and stretched.

_“I’ve really got to stop falling asleep at my workbench.”_ He thought to himself. After a few more stretches, Tony headed up to his floor, grinning as he saw a stack of boxes in the living room.

“My stuff arrived!” The man exclaimed with a grin.

“Yes Boss, Mr. Hogan brought them up when they arrived about an hour ago.” Friday said.

“I do have to get ready for the girls to come over…” He began as he turned to squint at the clock. ”But I guess I have a bit of time. Hey, Fri, where’s Pete?”

“Peter is currently in his bed.” Tony wondered if the boy was tired; he decided not to disturb him. Peter could look at his new things later. Tony grabbed a pair of scissors from the kitchen before walking to the stack of boxes, carefully opening the largest one. Shortly after he began looking happily at his new purchases, Tony heard Friday’s voice once more.

“Sorry to interrupt, Boss, but Mr. Odinson would like permission to access your floor.”

“Which one?” Tony asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Loki.” Tony rolled his eyes.

“He didn’t try to charm you into letting him up here before asking for permission, did he?” Tony asked suspiciously.

“No, I can confirm that the prince seems to be behaving.” The response made Tony chuckle as Friday continued. “Mr. Odinson seems eager to speak to you.”

“Fine. Tell him he can come up for a few minutes. I don’t have long though, gotta go get cleaned up for the girls.”

“Yes, Sir.” Friday said. Tony continued to open up his packages, glancing up when he heard the elevator doors open.

“Hey, Reindeer Games. Kind of you to ask for permission this time.” He said teasingly. “What’s so urgent?”

“Whatever makes you think that I have something urgent to discuss with you?” Loki asked, his brow raised.

“Well, you’re requesting permission to visit me on my private floor, and Friday said you were eager to speak to me…are you telling me that it’s not urgent?”

“It’s not.” The god began, clearing his throat. “I just wanted to let you know that Peter seems to have taken a liking to Sergeant Barnes.” Tony stiffened up immediately—the action didn’t go unnoticed by Loki.

“What makes you think that I need to know that?” Tony asked with a sniff as he began to open another box. “Peter can spend time with whomever he wishes. Besides, Peter likes everyone. He likes you, doesn’t he?” Tony asked with a smirk, trying to change the conversation into one of their usual banters rather than the humorless one Loki seemed to be interested in having.

“Be serious, Stark. I know you don’t trust the Sergeant.” Loki said. Tony’s stomach dropped.

“If I didn’t trust Barnes, why the hell would I leave Peter alone with him?” Tony asked after a moment, avoiding Loki’s eyes by looking through his purchases.

“That’s something else I’m trying to figure out.” The prince replied as he analyzed the genius. “Perhaps if I knew the history between you two…”

“Stop right there. There’s no history between us.”

“Don’t insult me. You can’t lie to the God of Mischief and have it go unnoticed.” Tony stared hard at the Asgardian for several moments.

“Fine, let’s make a deal then. Thor told us that when you attacked New York, you weren’t in control of your actions. He wouldn’t go into specifics. You tell me exactly what happened, and I’ll tell you the history between Barnes and me.” The genius challenged. While he was extremely curious about who had controlled Loki (and if the story was even true—perhaps Loki had tricked Thor into believing it) he knew how private Loki was. He was sure the god would never accept his terms. The god stared at Tony for several moments, and just as he thought Loki was about to storm angrily back to the elevator, Loki opened his mouth.

“To make an incredibly long story short, my father always favored Thor. One day I found out that I am not Asgardian by blood. I am, in fact, the monster that parents tell their children of at night; a frost giant from Jotunheim. It seems Odin kidnapped me from Laufey, the king of Jotunheim, when I was merely an infant. I wanted to prove myself worthy of being called Odin’s son. So, I killed Laufey. I tried to destroy Jotunheim, but Thor stopped me.  As he did, the two of us almost fell to our deaths, but Odin caught us. I wanted him to acknowledge me just once, the way he always had done for Thor. He denied me. That was the moment I realized he was incapable of loving me the way he loved Thor. I had never been anything but a pawn to him. I let go of Thor’s hand, intending to fall through space to meet my death. However, I was caught and imprisoned. I was tortured for nearly two years until they managed to break me.” Loki said. His body language read as if he were making trivial small talk, though his eyes betrayed some of the pain he felt. Tony stared at the god, mouth open in shock. He could tell that Loki wasn’t lying to him, and he wondered why the other man was being so forthcoming. Was Loki really that curious to learn about his history with Barnes?

“Well, Stark. I upheld my end of the bargain.” Loki reminded, tilting his head slightly to look at the billionaire. In any other circumstance, Tony would have been upset at being somewhat forced to reveal something he wished to conceal. However, after learning a bit more about the god’s past, Tony realized that they actually had quite a bit in common, and he relaxed slightly.

“Barnes killed my parents.” Tony said before shaking his head and looking back down into one of his boxes. “It wasn’t really him, I guess. It was the Winter Soldier. It’s just…” Tony paused for a moment; he had never told the real story of what had happened to anyone aside from Rhodey. However, to his surprise, Tony found the words spilling from his mouth before he could stop them. “About two years ago, I was in Siberia with Cap and Barnes. While there, I saw video footage of the Winter Soldier killing my parents. Prior to that, I thought my parents’ deaths were an accident. The worst part was that Steve knew the whole time about what Bucky had done. My father loved Steve—far more than he ever loved me—and Steve...he just did nothing. He just kept protecting Barnes. I got angry after seeing the footage and went after Barnes. I had just watched the guy murder my mother, wouldn’t you want to kill him? But Cap came after me. We fought. He ended up smashing my arc reactor and leaving me there, escaping with Barnes. Didn’t see him for about two years after that. He just came back about a month before you arrived on Earth.” Tony was wringing his hands, eyes down as Loki continued to listen. “I know Barnes had no choice in killing my parents. Hydra wanted it, and he happened to be their puppet…but every time I see him, the video of him snapping my mother’s neck just plays in my head again and again…” Tony trailed off as he squeezed his left arm; he would **_not_** have a panic attack in front of Loki.

“If the man who murdered my mother were still alive, I would stop at nothing to end his life. However, as a man who knows what it is like to do things you wish not to do, I can tell you that the guilt is insufferable.” The god said softly, and Tony looked up at him.

“I know that. It’s just. I…” He hesitated, and Loki spoke again.

“It’s just the Captain trusts him, and you do not trust the Captain. Therefore, you cannot trust the Sergeant.”

“Maybe.” The genius admitted softly as he continued to nurse his arm. “That with the image of him killing my mom…” Tony didn’t even want to mention that he was terrified Bucky would steal his family’s love, turning them all against him as the man had inadvertently done in the past.

“I see…” Loki said thoughtfully. “It’s now clearer to me why you find it difficult to be around the Sergeant. You needn’t worry, Stark. I’ll keep an eye on Peter if he is around the Sergeant…or the Captain, for that matter.”

“Uh…thanks.” Tony said, suddenly feeling incredibly awkward at having been so open with the prince. Loki nodded and turned on his heels to exit, but Tony spoke up again. “Hey, you’re, uh…actually the only one besides Rhodey who knows all this so—“Loki cut off the man with a rather dark chuckle.

“I’m not one for gossip.” Tony nodded slowly, and as he glanced down into the box he had just opened, he suddenly remembered something.

“Hey, Elsa.” Tony pulled out a smaller box and tossed it at the god, who caught it in surprise. “Got this for you after the stunt you pulled a few nights ago. Make sure you look at it occasionally—no mischief after 10 pm, hmm?” Tony asked with a smirk. Loki blinked as he opened the box, his eyes widening at what he saw. Inside was a Gucci watch with a deep green face encased in gold, the watch set on a band of black leather. Loki looked up at the other man, expecting to be told that the gift was some sort of joke. Though a smirk was set on the man’s lips, Tony’s eyes were dancing. Loki realized that the gift was not a joke. As a prince, the man had received a plethora of presents in his lifetime. However, he could count on one hand the number of times any of those presents had ever been selected with care. Looking down at the watch in his hand, Loki could tell that Tony had bought it specifically for him. A warmth that only three other people—Frigga, Thor, and Peter—had ever managed to make him feel, flooded his heart. He looked back up at the genius again, and it was in that moment that Loki mentally added Tony’s name to his list of adopted brothers.

“Thank you, Anthony. It suits me well.” The god said, still stunned. He turned around to leave, somewhat regaining his composure. “I’ll try to remember to end all mischief promptly at 9:59 pm.” He said, not bothering to turn around. As the god stepped into the elevator, a genuine smile spread across his face as he heard Tony laughing behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's so short. I had a busy weekend, and the next three days will also be pretty busy for me. I didn't want to leave you hanging for a week though! Thursday's chapter will be longer. :)


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Thanksgiving to my fellow Americans! Also, I know this says I'm publishing it on Friday the 23rd, but it's 8:13 pm on the 22nd here, okay? :P 
> 
> *TRIGGER WARNING*  
> Suicidal thoughts in the first part of the chapter.

Bucky ran his fingers through his hair in frustration before he collapsed back against the pillows on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. After a few moments, he groaned and closed his eyes, anxiety and embarrassment overwhelming him as he hid his face behind his hands.

_“What the hell is wrong with you? You fell apart and sobbed against Steve’s chest like a dame! You were the one that always used to save his scrawny ass, and now he’s here holding you while you act like a damn baby.”_ Bucky mentally berated himself as if it would somehow make him feel less embarrassed. He let out a deep breath before flipping onto his stomach and burying his face into his pillow.

_“What’s actually wrong with me though? Shuri got rid of the Soldier, right? Why did I feel like I lost control earlier? I just…I never felt **this** bad in Wakanda. Sure, I didn’t feel like myself, but at least I was happy whenever I wasn’t alone. Heck, I don’t even feel like myself here…but New York is home…and Steve is here. Steve…” _ The man cringed as he recalled his outburst in the car earlier that afternoon. _“I feel like I’m going crazy.”_ Bucky reflected on that thought as he lay in his bed, allowing the anxiety and embarrassment to slowly fade into an icy numbness.

_“Maybe Bucky’s gone. Shuri got rid of the soldier, but he was with me for a long time…twice as long as I was ever just plain Bucky…maybe the Soldier erased part of me. Maybe I can never be who I was before... Well, if that’s the case, I’d be better off dead.”_ The man chuckled wryly before jerking up suddenly as if he had just discovered the solution to all of his problems. _“Huh…Death…I mean, by all accounts I **should** be dead. I’m a hundred years old after all. Plus, I’d really be doing the world a favor…I’m just the yellow-bellied remains of a cold-blooded assassin. The world would definitely be a better place without someone like me around.”_ The faintest hint of a smile appeared on his lips as he thought about sleeping peacefully without any feelings of guilt, fear, embarrassment, or hopelessness to keep him awake. Bucky bit his bottom lip, unwittingly hugging himself as yet another thought entered his mind.

_“I can’t kill myself…I’ve seen the way he looks at me; I know Stark’s planning to kill me. I need to let him. If I kill myself first, I won’t be able to rest in peace. I took his parents…I can’t take his revenge too. ”_ A few tears slipped past his lashes as he moved quickly to bury himself beneath the thick covers of his bed, hugging his pillow tightly in an attempt to feel less lonely. Bucky found himself wishing that the pillow was Steve, and he hated himself for it. Just thinking about Steve made Bucky feel inferior. Steve was a gallant, rugged hero. He was a cowardly, weak villain. Bucky felt himself slightly resenting his friend, guilt taking over his body once again as he realized that he was begrudging Steve for being caring and heroic. He pulled at his hair roughly, craving the pain he knew it would bring. A plethora of various emotions coursed through the man all at once—none of them pleasant—and Bucky slammed his head down against his pillow, shouting into it in frustration. He felt so completely overwhelmed that he began to tremble, tears staining his pillow.

_“I hate this. I want it to end. I know I don’t deserve it to end, I deserve to suffer…but even Hell would be better than living with the memory of my unspeakable actions for which I can never be forgiven.”_ Bucky wanted all of it to stop: the memories of war, torture, and murder; guilt, frustration, and pain. He felt helpless. He felt worthless. There wasn’t a place on earth he could escape from the vivid images that constantly flooded his mind. The Soldier may be gone, but his memories survived in Bucky’s brain. The only way to truly save the world from the Winter Soldier was to ensure that he died. As much as he wanted to do it himself; to have Bucky Barnes finally die the hero America believed him to be for seventy years, he reminded himself that he needed to let Tony Stark get rid of the Soldier.

“Miss Friday?” Bucky asked in a trembling voice, unsure if he would receive an answer.

“Yes, Sergeant.” The AI replied, her voice far softer than usual, though Bucky didn’t know that.

“Don’t let Steve in here. Don’t let anyone in here unless it’s Tony Stark.”

“Would you like me to call Mr. Stark for you?”

“No!” He said hurriedly, figuring that if Tony knew he craved death, the man would rather keep him alive—Bucky couldn’t handle another week of this torture, let alone several more decades. “Just…let him in if he tries to come.”

“Yes, Sergeant.”

“Thank you, Miss Friday.” Bucky said, his voice a mere whisper. He lay motionless in his bed for several moments, sighing in relief as he felt himself become numb once again. For a little bit, he wanted to be just Bucky Barnes; a swell fella from Brooklyn. As Bucky tried desperately to pull from his pre-war memories, he thought of a warm summer day in 1938—a memory he had often used to help him endure long sessions of torture—when he, his sisters, and a scrawny Steve had gone to Central Park and had a picnic. It was a simple memory, but one which Bucky treasured. He closed his eyes as he recalled the cheerful banter from that day, trying not to focus on the Soldier’s memories lurking in the back of his mind.

 

* * *

 

Tony giggled as May handed him a photo. The picture was of an eight-year-old Peter carrying a plastic pumpkin full of candy while dressed as Iron Man.

“I found this while I was going through some old pictures the other day. I thought you’d like a copy.” May said with a grin.

“Oh gosh, I get to keep this? Thanks, May.” Tony returned the woman’s grin, flipping the photo for Pepper to see. “Pep, have you seen this?”

“May showed it to me when we were on our way up.” The woman said with a chuckle. “You’ve always been a cutie, haven’t you, Peter?” Pepper asked teasingly as she turned to the teenager. To all three of the adults’ surprise, Peter had not even protested when his aunt pulled out the old photo.

“Huh?” Peter looked up from the slice of chocolate cake he had hardly touched and laughed a little. “Oh, um, yeah, Miss Potts.”

“Pete, you okay?” Tony asked with a concerned frown.

“Y-yeah. I’m okay. Why wouldn’t I be? It’s summer!” He said with an unconvincing laugh. He looked back down at his cake, missing the look that May and Tony shared.

“Uh, well, you hardly touched your dinner or dessert. Also, you haven’t been this quiet since I met you.” Tony retorted, raising an eyebrow.

“Hey, I’m quiet sometimes!” Peter protested.

“No, you’re not.” May said. Peter gave her a pouty look.

“I’m just tired. Ned and I only slept for two hours last night.” Peter punctuated his statement with a yawn, as he moved his fork to his lips to force another bite of cake down. His stomach churned. He didn’t want Tony to know about his accidental discovery—The man clearly didn’t want Peter to know the truth about how his parents had died. Peter felt so guilty about coercing Tony into allowing his parent’s killer to live with them, that he felt sick to his stomach. Before dinner, Tony had given him a fancy cologne and a watch that Peter knew must have cost a small fortune; the guilt only increased after that.

“You’re going to bed early tonight then.” May said as she reached out to squeeze Peter’s arm, clearly a bit worried at her nephew’s lack of appetite. “You’ll make sure of it, won’t you, Tony?” She asked, turning to the man, one eyebrow raised.

“Yes, Ma’am.” He said with a playful salute. May rolled her eyes and Pepper interrupted.

“Don’t worry, May. Tony may be horrible at taking care of himself, but he’s actually pretty good at taking care of others.” Pepper laughed as Tony side-eyed her.

“Good!” May glanced at her watch and sighed. “I better get going. It’s already after eight-thirty and I have an early shift at the hospital tomorrow.” She said as she stood up.

“I’ll walk out with you, May. I have some paperwork I need to finish before I can go to bed tonight.” Pepper also stood up and Tony sighed.

“You girls can’t stay for just another half hour?”

“Some of us have to work, Tony.” Pepper teased. The man stood up and rolled his eyes as both women chuckled.

“All right, all right.” His signature grin was back on his lips as he laughed along with the girls. Let me at least walk you ladies to the elevator.

“A real gentleman!” May said before turning to Peter. She bent down and kissed the top of his head. “Hey, text me in the morning. I want to make sure you’re feeling okay.” The boy managed a smile and nodded.

“Okay, May, I will. Love you.”

“Love you too, baby.” She said before turning back to Tony and linking her arm with his. “All right, Tony. Lead the way.” The man grinned as he walked Pepper and May out through the living room and to the elevator. As he called the lift, Tony leaned in to kiss May’s cheek, and then Pepper’s, before he stood back and admired the new jewelry that they were wearing.

“I really do have an eye for matching beautiful women with beautiful jewelry, don’t I?” He teased, and both women groaned. Pepper rolled her eyes.

“You know, you really do. Perhaps you should quit inventing and go work in a department store.” May quipped, and Pepper snickered.

“No, I couldn’t do that. If women knew of my hidden ability, they would flock in droves to the department store. There would be riots breaking out just so that they could have a chance for me, Tony Stark, to match them to their ideal piece of jewelry. No, I can’t take that risk. It’s much safer if only my loved ones know of my talent.” Tony said with a smug smirk, both women biting back laughter by the end of Tony’s spiel.

“Goodbye, Tony.” Pepper said, pretending to be unamused as she stepped into the elevator.

“I am too tired for **_this_**.” May said as she waved her hand in front of Tony. The man feigned offense and she laughed softly as she followed her friend into the elevator. “Thanks for dinner, and thanks again for the earrings. Make sure Peter doesn’t stay up too late, okay?”

“I will. Goodbye, Girls.” Tony said, smiling as the elevator doors shut, taking the girls down to the first floor. He yawned suddenly, scratching the back of his head as he returned back to the table where Peter was still staring at his chocolate cake.

“Hey, Underoos, maybe you should head to bed now.” Tony teased.

“It’s not even nine yet! I want to spend more time with you…” Tony’s heart melted a little. He tried not to let it show on his face.

“All right then, what do you want to do?”

“I dunno…”

“C’mon, Pete. Help me out. A movie? A game?”

“I guess a game would be good…” Peter just wanted to distract Tony as much as possible. He didn’t know what else he could do to rectify his actions other than help Tony forget that Sergeant Barnes was a few floors below them.

“Perfect.” Tony said with a clap of his hands. “Let’s go pick a game.”

“Okay.” Peter scooted his chair away from the table and joined the other man in the living area. As they were deciding on what to play, Friday spoke up.

“Boss, The elder Mr. Odinson requests your presence in the Avengers’ lounge.”

“Thor? What does he want?” Tony asked curiously. The AI was silent for several moments, and Tony presumed she was relaying his question to Thor.

“Mr. Wilson is going to teach the Odinson brothers how to play Twister, and he believes it would be more fun if you and Peter were to join them.” Tony laughed aloud at the thought of the two gods trying to play Twister. He truly wanted to avoid Bucky at all costs, but he knew that Peter would get suspicious if he turned down an opportunity to witness Thor and Loki making spectacles of themselves.  

“Is it just the three of them?” Tony asked, trying to sound casual.

“No. Most everyone is with them.” Friday replied.

“Oh…good. Okay, Pete! What do you say we go witness some gods getting all tangled up?”

‘Mr. Stark…we don’t have to.” Peter said hurriedly, no matter how badly he wanted to witness Thor and Loki’s first game of Twister. “It’s okay, if it’s just us.” Tony frowned again, reaching his hand out to push the curls off Peter’s forehead, feeling it to see if the teenager had a fever.

“You don’t feel feverish… you sure you’re okay, Bud?” Peter bit his bottom lip, realizing that he was coming off as suspicious.

“I’m fine! You just looked tired. If you want to go downstairs, I wouldn’t miss seeing Thor and Loki play Twister for anything!” The boy said quickly, deciding that from now on, he just wouldn’t leave his mentor’s side as long as the Sergeant was around. Peter knew if he tried anything more than that, Tony would definitely start to suspect something.

“Friday, tell Thor we’re on our way!” Tony said as he hopped up and headed towards the elevator. Peter followed him, and within two minutes, the doors were opening onto the lounge.

“Tony! Peter! Sam says this Twister game is a classic that Loki and I must learn if we’re to live on Earth.” Thor shouted as he saw Tony and Peter enter the room. Sam was grinning evilly behind Thor.

“I truly don’t understand how a simple game could possibly be a requisite to reside on Midgard.” Loki said, irritation evident in his voice. As Loki spoke Tony quickly scanned the room. He saw Steve, Natasha, and Bruce drinking coffee in the kitchen. Wanda and Vision were chatting and sitting a little **_too_** close on a couch at the far end of the room. However, Barnes wasn’t anywhere in sight. Tony let out a breath he did not realize he had been holding, turning his attention to Loki.

“He’s right, Frosty. I am completely appalled at myself for not having introduced you to the game sooner.” Tony said, keeping his face serious. Loki seemed to take this into consideration for several moments.

“Fine, I’ll play.” The god said in resignation. Sam quickly opened up the box and took out the mat, shaking it out before he laid it flat onto the floor. Thor looked excited. Loki was clearly unimpressed.

“It’s the most fun when four people play. I would **_love_** to play, but someone has to operate the spinner.” Sam said as he looked at the other four.

“Hold on a minute there, you should definitely join the game. I don’t mind spinning.” Tony said quickly, but Sam just shook his head and grinned. Peter grabbed Tony’s arm and squeezed it gently to get the older man’s attention.

“C’mon, Mr. Stark. It’ll be fun!” Peter urged, and Tony couldn’t turn him down.

“All right, all right.” He said with a laugh as he shook his head. Peter grinned, feeling pleased that the Sergeant wasn’t present, and that Tony seemed properly distracted. Peter ran his phone over to Sam and handed it to him.

“Get a video of me playing Twister with them. I have to show Ned!” He whispered, and Sam was more than happy to comply. Peter ran back to the Twister mat and stood next to Loki as Tony explained how the game worked.

“Midgardian games are so simplistic. I don’t even understand how—“ The Prince was cut off by Sam’s shouting.

“Right hand blue!” The four all put a hand down on a blue circle as Sam spun the spinner again.

“Left hand yellow!”

“Right hand red!”

“This is a hardly a game worth—“ Loki was cut off again.

“Left foot blue!”

“Right foot green!” Peter twisted, stretching his leg beneath Thor who was stretching his leg over Tony’s. Loki grunted as he tried to maneuver his leg to a green space without falling over.

“Not as simple as it seems, huh, Reindeer Games?” Tony asked with a teasing smirk.

“Shut up, I’m concentrating.” He replied.

“Left foot red!” Peter was quick to maneuver into his next position. Thor tried to move quickly as well, accidentally kicking Loki in the chest.

“Watch it, you Oaf!”

“Sorry, Brother.” Thor said with a laugh, his butt now up in the air as he stretched across the board. Tony started laughing so hard that he fell over.

“Stark, you’re out! Hey, come hold Spiderkid’s phone for me while I spin.” Sam said as he wheezed from laughter, and Tony jogged over to grab Peter’s phone from the other man. Sam spun again and both Tony and Sam looked at each other, laughing even harder as they saw what the spinner had landed on.

“Right hand green!” Sam finally managed to call out. Peter moved quickly into place, twisted up like a pretzel. The limber boy had no problem moving into the next position, but the same could not be said for Thor and Loki. Peter was giggling as Loki stuck his foot in Thor’s face while attempting to move it. Thor’s good eye blocked, he misjudged the distance he needed to reach, causing him to slip and fall on top of Loki and Peter. Sam and Tony were howling with laughter. Thor initially felt bad, but when he heard Peter laughing beneath him, he too started to laugh. After a few moments, even Loki was genuinely laughing. Tony raced up to the Twister mat, still filming with Peter’s phone. He captured the tangled limbs of the three still lying on the ground before focusing the camera on Loki.

“What’d you think of your first game of Twister?” Tony asked with a grin.

“I’ve never participated in anything so positively asinine in my entire life.” Loki replied as he untangled himself from Thor and Peter. Though his words were harsh, he was still laughing softly. Tony grinned as he stopped the recording and straightened back up.

“Let’s play again!” Peter said excitedly.

“Yes, I think I understand it a bit better now!” Thor agreed.

“Oh, I suppose I could try it once more. I’m sure I’ll win if **_someone_** doesn’t fall on me again.” He said pointedly to Thor. His brother just grinned at him.

“I’m not a Spiderkid or a god.” Tony said, still laughing. “I need to sit this one out.” He put his hands on his back and stretched a bit. He was way too old for Twister.

“Ughhhhh.” Peter whined but didn’t push it as he saw Tony stretching. “Okay, but you have to watch!”

“Trust me, I wouldn’t miss watching you three play Twister for anything. I’m going to grab a quick cup of coffee, but I’ll be back before anything good happens.” The billionaire said, turning to jog into the kitchen.

“Hey, Tony.” Bruce and Natasha greeted. Steve gave Tony a half-hearted smile but didn’t say anything.

“Hey, guys. Something wrong, Capsicle?” Tony asked as he grabbed a mug and started pouring himself a cup of coffee. Tony looked at the man over his shoulder as Steve shrugged.

“I don't know. Bucky’s just acting strangely.” Tony swallowed hard and Bruce spoke up.

“He’s gone through a lot, Steve. I’m sure the change of environment is just stressful on him. He’ll get back to his old self soon. Just give it time.”

“I don’t know, Bruce. I’ve never seen him the way he was today. He wasn’t just emotional or stressed. I’ve seen him like that before. He was…he was sobbing. He was inconsolable.” Steve said softly, clearly worried about his friend. Tony, who was already halfway out of the kitchen, stopped in his tracks for a moment. He moved immediately once he felt the others’ eyes on him.

“Listen to Bruce, this is a big change for him.” Tony heard Natasha say as he moved back to the other room. Tony watched the next Twister game laughing, though his thoughts were elsewhere. After another game of Twister, Peter suggested a movie. The five turned on Star Wars V, at Thor’s request, while the other three remained in the kitchen. Even though Tony liked the movie that was on the screen, he hardly watched it at all. The man couldn’t help but wonder why on earth Barnes was so upset, let alone sobbing. He wracked his brain for various reasons but decided that he didn’t know the man well enough to guess. Besides, as far as Tony was concerned, it could all be an act to keep Steve feeling soft around him. Barnes was definitely unpredictable. That made Tony feel even more anxious about the man’s presence in the tower. Tony’s thoughts were interrupted as he felt Peter’s head drop to his shoulder. He smiled and sat with Peter leaning against him for another ten minutes before getting up, slowly shifting the boy to lean against Thor.

“I’m going to work for a bit. Will you take him to his bed after the movie?” Tony asked softly, and Thor smiled as he put a large arm around the sleeping boy.

“Of course.” Tony smiled, knowing that Peter was safe with Thor and Loki in the room. He hurried down to his lab and started a large pot of coffee. Tony wasn’t sure if Barnes was dangerous or not, but he definitely planned on setting some new protocols in place with Friday. He also planned to design a few new safety measures; just in case the former assassin’s behavior continued to be erratic. Tony has been worried about the man stealing his family, but until that night, he hadn’t worried about him hurting them. Tony trusted the Wakandan Princess’ intellect, but even the smartest mind could not always predict irregular patterns of behavior. The genius sat down to work, satisfied in knowing that once he finished Barnes-proofing the tower, even a mentally unstable Bucky Barnes would never be able to hurt anyone he loved.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first part of the chapter was heavy. I purposely put Bucky's part first so that we could end on the lighthearted stuff. Let me know what you guys thought about this chapter! :)


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone, sorry that I haven't been able to update since last Thursday. I've had a pretty rough/busy week, but I'll be publishing another chapter by Saturday to make up for the lack of content. :)

It had been nearly a week since Tony pulled an all-nighter to Barnes-proof the tower. While the safety measures that had been put into place did help give the man peace of mind, the behavior of everyone else in the tower was enough to set his teeth on edge. On the rare occasion that Barnes chose to grace everyone with his presence, he would spend the entire time sitting silently next to Steve while occasionally staring at Tony when he thought the genius wasn’t paying attention. Steve’s attitude had wavered between kicked puppy and grumpy old man for the entire week, only brightening slightly if his friend was in the room. Peter had been quiet and withdrawn, yet physically very clingy. The teenager insisted that nothing was wrong, but Tony didn’t believe him; the boy had not gone out on patrol since the week before. Even Loki, who Tony had secretly grown quite fond of, seemed a bit out of sorts. Tony’s anxiety was at an all-time high, and he needed something to calm him down. Luckily for Tony, he wasn’t the only one in the tower to notice the tense atmosphere. One morning, when everyone happened to be grabbing breakfast at the same time, Thor decided to take action.

“I know there has been a bit of a heat wave the past few days, but I think we all need to get out of the tower for a while. I’d quite enjoy a day at the beach, wouldn’t all of you?” The Asgardian spoke jovially, his spirits not dampening when his proposal was met with nothing but a few shrugs. “Oh come on, it’ll be fun. Playing in the sand and swimming and all that.” Loki rolled his eyes.

“I think you’re right, Thor,” Natasha said after a moment. “We all need to get some fresh air. We’ve been cooped up here for too long.” A mixture of sighs and groans were heard from around the table. Everyone knew that if Thor and Natasha were both insistent on going to the beach, then everyone would eventually end up joining whether they felt like it or not.

“All right everyone, go prepare your things. We shall leave in an hour!” Thor said with a hearty laugh, grabbing another pop tart as he headed off to get ready. Tony did _**not**_ feel like going out with everyone, especially not to a sandy place like the beach, but if the others would stop acting so damn strange then he was all for it.

“C’mon, Kid, let’s go find some trunks and sunblock.” Tony said as he got up from the table.

“Mr. Stark, we don’t have to go…I mean if you would rather stay…” Tony barely stopped himself from rolling his eyes.

“Pete, if Thor and Nat say we’re going to the beach, then we’re going to the beach. Those two don’t often pair up, but they’re just as formidable a team as Pepper and May when they do.” Tony managed to get a small chuckle from the boy which he counted as a win. The two turned to follow the rest of the Avengers out of the lounge as they all headed off to prepare for a day at the beach.

Nearly an hour later, everyone was down in the garage dressed in thin summer clothing and bathing suits, with the exceptions of Loki and Bucky, who were both adamant that they would not be swimming.

“All right, we’ll take two cars. I’ll drive one, and Cap can drive the other.” Tony said as he tossed a pair of keys to Steve. He could honestly not care less who drove the second car, but if Steve was driving, then he would have a 100 percent chance of having a Barnes-free vehicle.

“Sounds good.” Steve said as he caught the keys. Sam raced around to the passenger side of the car Steve held the keys for and opened the door to the front seat, smirking across the car at Bucky.

“Shotgun!” He called out as he threw his bag onto the front seat. Bucky looked mildly annoyed but said nothing. It was decided that Wanda and Vision would join Sam and the Super Soldiers in the smaller car, and the others would join Tony as he drove his SUV for once. As everyone began to load their things into the cars, Wanda’s phone slipped from her pocket and fell to the ground. Bucky, who was next to her, did not hesitate in squatting down to grab the phone, handing it up to the girl who thanked him with a soft smile. When the man moved to stand back up, his Vibranium arm clanged rather loudly against the car’s open door, attracting the attention of the others. As Tony turned to see the source of the noise, he did not see Bucky Barnes being a gentleman; he saw the Winter Soldier crouching beside an open car door. Everyone else in the garage disappeared, and Tony felt as if he had been doused in ice water. The man’s mouth parted slightly as the Winter Soldier slowly looked up at him with murderous intent, causing the genius to unconsciously take a step backward. Tony thought his heart would beat clear out of his chest as he watched the assassin stand up and glower at him. He moved his hand to his arc reactor, preparing to suit up. Suddenly, Tony felt a hand on his back, and the man gasped loudly. He turned around quickly; ready to engage in combat.

“Mr. Stark. Are you okay?” Peter asked. His eyes widened when he saw the boy. Tony looked around and realized that he was no longer alone with the Winter Soldier. Everyone was staring at Tony as if he’d lost his mind, which only caused the man’s heart to pound even more rapidly.

“Fine, Kid.” Tony attempted a laugh, though it sounded extremely unconvincing. He glanced at Barnes, who was still staring at him, and took a shaky breath. “Actually not feeling too hot though. Must have been some bad bacon at breakfast. You guys will have to try to have fun without me.” The genius said quickly as he started walking toward the elevator, shoving his keys into Bruce’s hands as he walked past the man. “You’ve been promoted, Brucie.” Tony said, not stopping until he was inside the elevator. Once the doors closed and the car started moving, Tony leaned his full weight against the wall of the lift as he began to cry.

 

* * *

 

“What was ** _that_** all about?” Sam asked curiously as he leaned against the car.

“I’m going to stay with Mr. Stark! Uh, I mean…if he’s sick, maybe he’ll need me or something.” Peter said as he ran to the elevator. Loki, who also realized why Tony was upset, began to follow the teenager, but Thor pulled him back.

“Unhand me, Brother!” Loki demanded, but Thor shook his head.

“Loki, leave him be. Peter’s going, that’s enough.”

“If you truly think that he has a mere case of food poisoning—“ The Prince began but was interrupted by Natasha whispering softly beside him.

“He looked…scared.” Bruce nodded silently and Loki looked to Thor to see that his brother looked worried, but unsurprised, by Natasha’s statement. The god’s eyes flitted over to the others standing near the second car. Sam, Vision, and Wanda all appeared confused. Steve also seemed to be confused, and though the Captain was clearly worried, it seemed to Loki that Steve was worried about the wrong person. Bucky was staring hard at the ground; Loki observed at that the other man looked more exhausted than aggressive.

“If you can all see that something has upset Anthony, why aren’t you doing something about it?” Loki hissed angrily at his brother. Thor smiled softly as he realized that Loki actually cared for the other man.

“I would like nothing more than to make sure Tony’s all right, but Peter has gone already. If I’m upset, I’d like many of my friends to gather—the more the better. Imagine if something upset you, Brother. Would you want all of us in the room with you?” Thor asked.

“Well, of course not.” Loki replied.

“Exactly. I believe we’d make it worse.” Thor said, just as Steve spoke up.

“Uh… all right, everyone. Let’s head out.” Steve said as he turned to slide into the front seat of his car. Loki’s mouth was set in a firm line as he followed Thor into the back seat of the SUV which Bruce would be driving. As the two cars exited the garage, Loki turned back to his brother.

“Why didn’t those riding in the other vehicle seem nearly as concerned?” The Prince whispered. Thor paused.

“I don’t know…” The large god replied after a few moments. They rode in silence for several more minutes until Thor finally spoke again.

“Tony is the most resilient human I’ve ever met. Plus, he has Peter by his side. However, I don’t believe checking on his well-being after we return to the tower would be inappropriate.”

“I’ll go with you guys.” Bruce interrupted from the front seat.

“So will I.” Natasha said softly as she looked down at her lap.

“Well, I suppose setting aside a few moments of my evening for Anthony could be arranged.” Loki said. Thor smiled and slung an arm around his brother who looked at him in irritation.

“Why, Loki!” Thor started with a laugh, “You’ve become so caring. Mother would be quite pleased.” Thor said the words teasingly to fluster his brother; though he felt certain that Frigga was beaming with pride in Valhalla as he spoke.

 

* * *

 

Peter wrung his hands nervously as he rode the elevator up to the floor he shared with Tony. He knew that missing out on a beach trip to sit with his supposedly food-poisoned mentor would raise red flags for the man.

_“Maybe I should just tell Mr. Stark that I know so I can apologize for pushing him into having Sergeant Barnes live with us. I mean, I like the Sergeant a lot. He’s really cool. He seems so nice and stuff too…and it’s not like he **wanted** to kill Mr. Stark’s parents. It must suck to have been forced to kill people against your will…but also he **did** kill Mr. Stark’s parents. And like, I’m pretty chill for the most part, but I definitely don’t think I’d be okay with living with someone who murdered my parents either.” _ Peter’s mind was racing at a million miles a minute, but his thoughts ceased abruptly as the elevator doors opened and he heard a man crying. The boy silently stepped into the room, shocked to see **_the_** Tony Stark sitting on the couch, sobbing into his hands.

“Mr. Stark…” He said softly. The man’s head whipped up, his teary eyes widening in surprise.

“Kid…I…” Tony stammered, wiping furiously at the tears on his cheeks; as if could still prevent Peter from seeing them. New tears continued to flow from his eyes, and Tony thought he might vomit. This was the last thing he needed right now. The man knew that he didn’t deserve to be the hero, let alone father figure, to the greatest kid he’d ever met. But couldn’t he just catch a break for once? How could he explain this? This time Peter had seen too much, and there was not a single lie or clever joke for Tony to hide behind. There was **_no way_** that the kid would want to stay around a loser superhero who decided to sit home and cry instead of going to the beach. He was going to lose his kid. Tony started breathing quickly, unconsciously clawing at his left arm; the pain caused by his nails breaking the skin helped to ground him. 

“I’m so sorry!” Peter said as he ran to the couch, and pulled the sitting man into a tight hug. Tony froze, his eyes widening in shock against the teen’s stomach. “This is all my fault, Mr. Stark. I’m so sorry. I found out what really happened… about your parents, I mean. I wasn’t trying to be nosy, honest! But when you fell asleep in the lab with those newspaper articles…and I saw them…Don’t be mad, okay? I didn’t tell anyone. But…you should have told me. I’d never of asked for him to stay here if I knew. I mean, Sergeant Barnes is really nice and stuff. And I know it wasn’t really his fault, but also he’s the one that did that bad thing and you shouldn’t have to live with him and…” Peter was rambling so quickly that it caused Tony’s head to spin.

“Kid…”  


“And like, I noticed how you got nervous whenever he was in the room and stuff and I didn’t know what to do…”

“Peter.” At the sound of his name, the teenager stopped talking. Tony kept his face hidden against the boy for a moment until he was able to gain his composure, taking a deep breath as he pulled away from him. Tony trembled slightly, keeping his face downcast as he spoke. “It’s not your fault. I made the decision to let him move into the tower.”

“Yeah, because of me! I—“ Tony held up his hand, and Peter closed his mouth.

“I thought I could handle it. I **_can_** handle it. I’m just tired today. It won’t happen again.” Tony said as he closed his eyes and squeezed the bridge of his nose, partly to reduce the headache that was forming behind his eyes, and partly to keep his tears from flowing again. The young hero worshipped his mentor, and contrary to Tony’s belief, seeing the man cry while having a panic attack did not even come close to changing that. The billionaire swallowed hard as he dropped his right hand down to his left arm, squeezing it tightly.

_“Stark men are made of iron.”_ Howard’s mantra echoed in his mind, causing him to inhale sharply. Tony was still trembling as he opened his eyes, expecting Peter to look at him in disappointment—or possibly even disgust—before walking away. Confusion was written across Tony’s face as Peter dropped to his knees so that he was at eye level with his mentor.

“…You know that it’s okay to cry, right, Tony?” Peter asked softly, his eyes full of concern. The man’s eyes widened in surprise as he stared at the young man in front of him. Tony wasn’t sure what surprised him more: Peter calling him by his name for the first time, or being told for the first time in his life that it was okay to cry. The man held his composure quite well, but when a single tear escaped his eye and Peter leaned forward to pull the man into a warm embrace, Tony began to softly cry against the boy’s shoulder. The genius felt a myriad of emotions swirling around inside of him as his mind raced. He wanted to stop being angry. He wanted to stop being scared. It was all too much. It made him too tired. As Tony gripped Peter’s shirt, he heard his father’s voice again—this time chastising him for crying in the arms of a teenager.

“You… you said that Barnes was nice?” Tony asked quickly, trying to ignore Howard’s words in his mind.

“Um, yeah…he is.” Peter began, “But Mr. Stark—“

“Hey, no takebacks.” Tony interrupted him.

“It slipped earlier...”

“Don’t care. No more ‘Mr. Stark’.”

“…Tony,” Peter finally said with an exasperated sigh, “if being around him makes you feel this way…”

“Listen, Pete.” The man said as he pulled away to look at the boy, rubbing a hand over his tear-stained face, “I’m so tired that I don’t even know what to feel anymore. Sure, the guy might stare at me with murderous intent every now and then, but you’re a good judge of character, so maybe if I can get past the—“

“What are you talking about?” Peter asked in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

“’He stares at you with murderous intent?’”

“I’ve noticed Barnes doing it since he moved in. Seems to do it when he thinks no one’s paying attention.”

“I haven’t left you alone with him in a week, Mr. S—Tony…I’ve seen him looking at you too…but, uh… I mean, I always thought he looked kinda scared of you. Or nervous at least. Thor looked more murderous at breakfast yesterday when Sam took the last pop tart than I’ve ever seen Sergeant Barnes look.” Peter’s remark earned a soft laugh from Tony before the man leaned back into the couch, staring up at the ceiling with a perplexed expression on his face. Peter plopped down beside him, waiting patiently for Tony to speak again.

“I don’t know…why would Barnes be afraid of me? I mean, I get it if I’m in the suit…but physically speaking, I’m no match for him without it.” Tony wondered aloud, more to himself than his protégé. Peter answered anyway.

“Well, I mean… he did, um…you know… kill your parents, Tony. Does Sergeant Barnes know that you know he is the one who killed them?” Peter asked curiously.

“Uh, yeah. He’s aware.” Tony said, clearing his throat slightly.

“Oh. Well, he doesn’t know you like I do, right? I mean, maybe he thinks that you’ll try and hurt him as revenge or something.” Oh. Ouch. That hit a little bit too close to home. Tony swallowed hard as he ran his fingers through his hair.

“Kid…”

“Oh gosh, Mr. Stark—I mean Tony—let’s change the subject, okay?” Peter said, eyes filled with worry as he clearly thought his mentor was about to have another panic attack.

“Peter, it’s okay. I’m fine.” Tony reassured him. “It’s just…” The man hesitated for a moment. If he told Peter the truth, it would make Steve look bad in Peter’s eyes. He knew that Peter would side with him no matter what. It was in that moment that Tony realized no matter what happened or who Barnes took from him, he would never get Peter—not if Peter had to choose between the two of them. Warmth filled Tony’s heart and he grasped at his chest; not because he felt anxious, but because being loved so strongly was something with which he was extremely unfamiliar.

“No, you don’t have to talk. We won’t think about him anymore.”

“You don’t know the whole story, Kid.” Tony began, Steve be damned. Peter had just witnessed a side of Tony no one else but Rhodey had ever come close to witnessing; he deserved to know the truth. “After your first fight at the airport, I went off to Siberia to help Steve. I realized he was right about Barnes, and I wanted to be a good friend, but…uh…long story short: There was this bad guy named Zemo who had lured us there. Yadda yadda yadda, Zemo showed me the tape of the Winter Soldier killing my parents. I found out that Steve knew Hydra had them killed, but he had kept it from me. I tried to kill Barnes; Steve took his side. I couldn’t bring myself to hurt Steve no matter how much I wanted to get to Barnes. The fight ended up with me lying on the ground with a busted arc reactor while Cap and Barnes took off.” Tony glanced up at Peter who was staring at him in shock.

“Look, I know I shouldn’t have tried to kill Barnes, okay? But I had just found out—I saw him kill my mother—“

“I’m sorry? You mean, when you came back with that black eye pretending that everything was just fine and dandy, that **_Captain America_** had smashed your arc reactor and just left you all alone in **_SIBERIA_**?” Peter was clearly furious; Tony was shocked.

“Pete, we all made mistakes that day. I tried to kill Barnes for crying out loud.”

“No! Don’t you make excuses for him!” Peter said, shaking his finger at Tony. The man just stared at him with widened eyes. “He lied to you and then hurt you! That is **_not_** what friends do.”

“You weren’t there, I was really going after Barnes, Pete.”

“NO! You said that you held back against Captain Rogers. He’d fought alongside you enough to know if you were holding back or not. If he had just blocked Sergeant Barnes or something… I don’t know. He shouldn’t have fought you. You had the right to be upset! Friends don’t lie to each other and take sides like that.” Tony sighed deeply, maybe he shouldn’t have told Peter after all.

“Listen, Kid. I…don’t like to think about that day much, okay?” Tony reached out to squeeze the teenager’s shoulder. “It…means a lot to me that you think what I did was justified, but it wasn’t...”

“Yes it was! Even if Sergeant Barnes didn’t really do it, the Captain lied to you. If he had told you before, it would have given you time. Your anger in that moment—“

“There was one point when I had Barnes in a headlock.” Tony said, interrupting the boy. “I asked him if he remembered them. Do you want to know what his response was? He said, ‘I remember **_all_** of them.’ At the time I was so angry that it all went in one ear and out the other…but I know what it’s like to be blamed for the loss of innocent lives. It’s a feeling I never want you to know.” The man took a deep breath before continuing. “Hydra used Barnes to take my parents away from me. Then I blamed him for taking away my second family too.” He said softly, trying desperately to push down the emotions he felt bubbling up once again. “I was never afraid that he would hurt anyone here—well, not until his behavior started to become erratic—that’s why I never had a problem with anyone being around him. It’s just…every time I see him, I see the Winter Soldier. Again and again, I just see him bashing in Howard’s face…his hand on my mother’s neck…and I…I…” Tony struggled to take a breath and Peter leaned his head against Tony’s shoulder, hugging the man once again.

“Stop, Mr. Stark.” Peter said. He didn’t correct himself, and Tony honestly hadn’t even noticed. “I’ll help you find a way to make it all go away. If you want me to, I will tell Sergeant Barnes and **_Captain America_** that they need to move out. I really will!” The boy said, despite the fact that the thought of telling the two super soldiers to leave the tower made him want to vomit. Tony reached up to touch one of Peter’s arms that was wrapped around him. Even though he did not want Barnes in his tower, the thought of Steve leaving made him terribly anxious. The man was a stubborn pain in the ass that hurt Tony far more often than he made him feel loved. However, even after the two-year rift in their friendship, Tony still considered Steve to be part of his dysfunctional family; he didn’t want that to change.

“Kid, I’m too tired right now.” Tony said, his limbs beginning to feel like jelly as he moved his legs up onto the ottoman in front of him. The man’s intense panic attack, crying, and the serious conversation he had had with Peter took far too much out of him. He groaned as he closed his eyes, leaning his head back against the couch.

“Why don’t you go to your bed? You’ll be more comfortable.” Peter suggested softly.

“I’m fine here. Too much effort to move.” He mumbled. While this was true as Tony was incredibly lazy at times, he mainly just didn’t want to be alone. The man needed sleep and he couldn’t deal with another bad dream. Peter must have understood that the man didn’t want him to leave as Tony heard the TV click on before feeling a blanket being draped over him. He reminded himself to thank Peter next time he had the energy to open his mouth. The sound of a 90s sitcom laugh track was the last thing Tony remembered hearing before he drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Angst, angst, angst with a few bits of fluff. We'll have a few more angsty chapters before the real fluff begins :) 
> 
> Hope you enjoyed the chapter!


	12. Chapter 12

Upon arriving at the beach, the entire team had to admit that Thor was right; a day out was exactly what they had all needed. After finding a secluded spot and spreading out some beach towels, everyone was eager to get into the water—everyone except for Loki and Bucky that is. Much to Thor’s chagrin, Loki—still wearing a dark suit despite being a frost giant in 85 **°** weather*—used his magic to summon up a large beach umbrella complete with a small table and chair beneath it.

“I’ll be perfectly fine here, Brother. Run along.” He said as he waved Thor away. His brother shook his head but didn’t bother to argue before jogging off to join the others. Loki summoned a pitcher of iced tea, pouring himself a glass as he watched the two super soldiers interacting a few feet away.

“C’mon, Buck. I know you love swimming.”

“I did, Steve. I dunno. Haven’t done it in years.” Bucky mumbled with disinterest. The Captain sighed.

“You’ve been out of sorts all week.” Steve mused as he folded his arms over his chest.

“Can’t a guy just want to be alone for a while?” Bucky tried to keep the irritation out of his voice. He took a deep breath, forcing himself to sound cheerful. “I promise I’ll holler if I need something, okay? Now go swim and let me relax!” Steve seemed reluctant, but he calmed down and nodded.

“All right, just let me know if you need anything!” The man said before he took off to join the others. Bucky nodded, groaning the moment he knew Steve wouldn’t be able to hear him anymore. As he started to kneel down onto his towel, Bucky was interrupted by the sound of Loki’s voice.

“Care for a seat, Sergeant?” The Prince asked charmingly, a second chair appearing under the umbrella with a wave of Loki’s hand.

“Oh, uh… thanks.” Bucky said as moved to sit down in the chair he was offered. He didn’t exactly like the idea of being so near to the god, but it sure beat sitting in the sand under the relentless heat of the sun. The two men sat in silence for several minutes before Loki glanced at Bucky.

“How does it feel to be back in New York, Sergeant?” The god asked casually.

“Huh?” Bucky asked as Loki’s voice pried him from the dark recesses of his mind. “Oh, sorry…Uh, yeah. It’s great.” Bucky lied. The man was so unconvincing that Loki rolled his eyes when the Sergeant turned his attention back to the horizon. Nearly two minutes passed before Bucky realized that it was extremely rude of him to not reciprocate the question, and he glanced at the man beside him, clearing his throat awkwardly.

“Uh…Your Majesty?” Though “Your Majesty” was Thor’s title, the prince did not bother to correct him.

“Go on, Sergeant.”

“Oh, uh, how are you enjoying New York? Or Earth for that matter?”

“It’s certainly more enjoyable than the last time I was here.” Bucky wasn’t sure what to do with that response, so he nodded awkwardly, wondering what had happened to the suave Bucky Barnes he had been once upon a time.

“That’s good…I guess.”

“Isn’t it? Would you care for some tea, Sergeant?”

“About who?”

“I beg your pardon?” Loki asked, motioning to the pitcher of iced tea on the table beside him.

“Oh…” Bucky said as he noticed the tea for the first time. “Tea would be great, thank you.” Bucky shook his head slightly, trying to snap himself back to reality, and mumbled another “thank you” when he was handed the iced tea a few moments later. He quickly downed the glass, and it suddenly occurred to the man that he could not recall the last time he had drunken anything. Loki raised an eyebrow as he looked at the Sergeant.

“Please, help yourself to more tea.” The god said, and Bucky did not hesitate to take Loki up on his offer. After drinking a second glass, Bucky’s thoughts became a bit clearer. He leaned back in the chair, sighing deeply as he used his metal hand to rub the back of his neck.

“Thanks.” He said, and Loki shook his head slightly.

“Not at all.” The two resumed sitting in silence, though it was not quite as uncomfortable as it had been before. Bucky turned his attention to the water, watching Steve and his superhero friends splashing around happily when Loki chose to interrupt his thoughts once more.

“What is your biggest regret?”

“Pardon?” Bucky asked in surprise as he turned back to face Loki.

“Oh come, Sergeant, everyone has at least one action for which they are remorseful. I’m extremely curious about what it is that you regret.” Jaw clenching, Bucky turned his eyes down to the sand. The man was uncertain what Loki knew of his past, but he certainly did not want to think about it, let alone discuss it with the god. Several moments of silence passed. Loki glanced down at the watch on his wrist before breaking the silence again.

“Do you truly regret nothing?” Loki persisted with an edge of irritation in his tone. Bucky turned to look at the Asgardian, clenching his jaw so tightly that it began to ache. He wasn’t sure what Loki wanted from him, but Bucky was determined to remain silent—he didn’t owe the god anything. Bucky did not want to think about all of the unspeakable acts he had committed as the Winter Soldier, he did not want others to know the terrible things he had done, and he **_certainly_** did **_not_** want to have another breakdown in public.

“I’m terribly sorry,” Loki said, his smooth voice laced with impatience. “But I simply must ensure that you were not acting of your own free will.” Confusion was written across the Sergeant’s face as the god quickly reached out, placing his hand firmly on the man’s forehead. All at once, Bucky vividly saw the face of every person that the Winter Soldier had killed in cold blood. Thousands of gruesome images that took turns haunting his dreams entered his mind simultaneously, causing him to wail loudly. Loki pulled his hand away in surprise—though it wasn’t the noise that had startled him. The god had used his power many times to create a psychic link with others; however, this was the first time he had ever witnessed multiple memories or felt such intense pain while doing so.

The moment Loki removed his hand from Bucky, the man fell from his chair, whimpering softly as he tried to conceal the agony he felt. The noise, which had immediately attracted the Avengers’ attention, had Steve frantically running towards the two men still on shore.

“What did you do to him?” Steve called as he closed the gap between himself and Bucky. “WHAT DID YOU DO?” He shouted again as he dropped to the ground and put his hand on the back of the man who was now trembling silently in the sand, face buried in his hands. A contrite looking Loki fidgeted in his seat as Thor and the others caught up to the Captain.

“I never meant to cause him pain…” the god started.

“Loki!” The mixture of anger and disappointment in his brother’s voice actually caused the prince to bow his head in shame for a moment before he turned his eyes back toward Thor.

“I was only trying to ensure that he had no intention of harming Anthony or P—“

“So Tony put you up to this?” Steve interrupted, nostrils flaring. Loki’s expression darkened and he narrowed his eyes in contempt before scoffing at the Captain’s words.

“Hardly. And why is it that you’re so awfully quick to find fault with Anthony no matter the situation?” Steve opened his mouth to reply, finger mid-wag, when he felt a strong metal arm grasp his own.

“Take me home.” Bucky said softly. Steve looked conflicted over whether or not to finish his fight. “Now.” Bucky said adamantly. The Captain glared daggers in Loki’s direction before helping his friend up, but, to Steve’s dismay, Bucky pushed him away as he turned to head back to the car. Everyone stood in silence for a moment as Steve went after his friend. After a few longing glances toward the water, the group gathered their things and shuffled back to parking lot to make their way back to the tower.

 

* * *

 

Tony, who was far more tired than he had realized, slept for the entire afternoon. When he finally woke up around 5 PM, he cracked an eye open to see Peter still sitting beside him, grinning stupidly at something on his phone.

“Text from a cute girl?” Tony asked with a gravelly voice. Peter looked up in surprise at hearing the man’s voice and shook his head.

“Nope. From Ned.” Tony laughed, and Peter flopped over, pressing himself into the man’s side as he held up his phone. “Look at what Ned sent me.” Tony looked at what appeared to be a news article from a small, local paper. He wondered for a brief moment why it would make Peter so excited until his eyes adjusted to the screen and settled on the headline: Queens Saddened by Lack of Spiderman Sightings. Tony grinned with pride as he looked at Peter, sitting up slightly so that he could move to ruffle the boy’s hair.

“I think Spiderman needs to go out and check on his fans tonight.” Peter laughed before throwing a worried glance in his mentor’s direction.

“I don’t know…”

“Kid, you’re going on patrol tonight. That’s a direct order from Iron Man.” He said as he playfully poked the teenager’s stomach, prompting a giggle not unlike the Pillsbury Doughboy’s. Tony grinned and stood up, stretching for a moment before heading off to the kitchen.

“You need something to eat before you go off to fight crime, Spiderman. We have some leftovers from the other night, right?”

“Yep! Put ‘em on the second shelf, I think.” The young hero said as he moved to join Tony in the kitchen. The two chatted casually as they heated up their food, and Tony was relieved that Peter was back to his happy, talkative self. They had a nice dinner together before Peter disappeared to put on his suit as Tony rinsed their dishes and threw them into the dishwasher. While he was drying his hands, Peter re-appeared in his suit, mask in hand. The boy was biting his bottom lip, as he tossed a worried glance at his mentor.

“Something wrong, Bud?”

“Um…Tony, are you sure you’ll be okay?” The genius felt his heart melt completely, and he stepped forward to pull the boy into a warm embrace. Peter was a bit surprised, but he did not hesitate to return the hug. After a few moments, Tony pulled away, resting his hands on Peter’s shoulders.

“I’m going to be just fine thanks to you. Don’t worry about me, okay?”

“Thanks to me?” Peter asked in confusion. “But…I didn’t do anything…”

“You were there for me when I needed you, Kid. That’s more than I can say for most people…Now if I’m not mistaken, you received a direct order from Iron Man to go patrol Queens.”

“Oh yeah, and he gets super scary if I disobey him.”

“That’s right!” Tony said with a laugh as Peter slipped on his mask. The young hero opened the glass door leading to the balcony, stepping into the cool night air as Tony called out to him.

“Underoos, back by midnight!” Peter saluted in response before launching a web and swinging off the balcony; which nearly gave Tony a heart attack despite having seen Peter do the same thing dozens of times before. The genius put a hand on his chest and let out a deep breath before chuckling softly. After a few moments of pondering what he should do, Tony decided to go tinker in his lab for a while. He was unsure if the others were back from their outing or not, but the man knew he did not want to risk running into any of them for the rest of the day. After grabbing his phone off the coffee table, he headed down to his lab. About an hour later, he was interrupted by Friday.

“Boss, the Odinsons, Dr. Banner, and Miss Romanov are requesting to visit you again. Shall I tell them to join you here?”

“No, Fri, I don’t want to…wait, you said ‘again’?”

“Yes, Boss. They asked to see you a few hours ago as well. However, both you and Peter were asleep at that time, and I did not believe it to be urgent enough to wake you.”

“Sweetheart, you gotta tell me when someone asks for me.”

“They said they would ask again later.” Tony looked straight into one of Friday’s cameras before shaking his head.

“Never had this problem with Jarvis.” He muttered as he set down the wrench he was holding.

“What was that?” Friday asked, her tone pointed.

“Nothing, Dear.” The genius said as he rolled his eyes. “What do the others need to see me for?”

“I believe they’re worried about you.” Tony paused in surprise before smiling softly to himself. The smile lasting for only a brief moment before he bit his bottom lip thoughtfully. If even Natasha was openly worried about him, he really must have been in bad shape earlier. Still, Tony couldn’t help but notice that Friday had not mentioned Steve’s name. Bruce and Thor had never hesitated in showing concern for him, but if it had been obvious enough to warrant Loki and Natasha’s concern, shouldn’t Steve also be at least a bit worried about him? Steve was dense as hell, but he was not unobservant. Tony sighed softly and shook his head. He didn’t need Steve’s concern.

“Tell them that I’m feeling much better, but I still have a bit of a headache, so I’ll see them at breakfast, okay?”

“Yes, Boss.”

“Oh…and, Friday? Tell them I appreciate them checking up on me.”

“Yes, Boss.” The AI repeated, and Tony stood in silence for a moment before picking his wrench back up and losing himself in his work once again.

 

* * *

 

“Boss, Peter has just returned to the tower.” Tony blinked in surprise.

“What time is it?”

“It is 11:56 PM.” He straightened up and rubbed his neck, wondering where the time had gone.

“He’s okay?”

“Yes, Boss. He seems to be very tired. He is getting into bed now.”

“Good boy.” Tony said as leaned back over to carefully cut a wire on his latest project.

“Might I suggest that you also be a good boy and go to bed?”

“You might suggest it, but I won’t do it.” The man said stubbornly as he dropped his wire cutters onto his workbench. “I slept all day long.”

“A healthy adult needs seven to nine hours of sleep per night. You slept for approximately six hours this afternoon. For the entire week, you slept for a total of—“

“All right, all right. Geez, so pushy. How about this: I promise to go to bed within two hours if you stop trying to tell me how I’m not sleeping enough.”

“That seems like an acceptable compromise.”

“I’m **_so_** glad you think so.” Tony rolled his eyes—his AI had really picked up being sassy far too easily. The man stood up and shook his head, scratching his side as he yawned.

_“I don’t want to work on anything too time-consuming if I only have two hours.”_ Tony thought to himself. _“You know, the coffee maker in the lounge seemed to take forever this morning. Maybe it needs an upgrade.”_ He gave a little nod of his head as he headed to the elevator. The genius highly doubted that anyone would be in the lounge after midnight. Well, unless Thor had fallen asleep watching a movie again. As soon as the doors opened, Tony sighed in relief to see that the floor was dark and the TV off. He made a beeline for the kitchen, wanting to get in and out as quickly as possible. Tony flipped the lights on as he stepped into the kitchen, jumping back in surprise as a wide-eyed Bucky Barnes stared up at him from the kitchen table.

“What the fuck, Barnes?” Tony shouted, clutching his chest as his heart beat rapidly. “You trying to give me a heart attack?”

“…I thought everyone would be asleep. I…sorry.” The man stammered before he looked down at the glass of water on the table in front of him. To Tony’s surprise, he calmed down quite quickly and did not feel on the verge of a panic attack despite being scared out of his skin by the Winter Soldier. However, the billionaire realized that for the very first time, he did not actually see the Winter Soldier in front of him. He saw someone else. Tony saw someone who was sad and lonely; someone who was broken. Now that he was no longer preoccupied with the fact that Barnes had been the Winter Soldier, it was so clear to see that Tony wondered how he could have missed it before. He suddenly wondered where Steve was. He clearly loved his best friend more than anything or anyone, so why was Barnes sitting all alone in the middle of the night? Tony shook his head, deciding that he shouldn’t get involved before he moved to unplug the coffee maker from the wall. As he picked it up to take back to his lab, Barnes looked up at him.

“Would you just kill me already?”

“Uh…come again?” Tony asked, wondering if he had misheard the man.

“Just end it. I know you’re planning to kill me. I won’t fight back this time.” The man muttered before returning his gaze to the water on the table. Tony just stared, unsure of what to say.

“Stark, please.” Bucky pleaded after several moments of silence. “I know I don’t deserve it, but please just end it. Kill me.”

“I…I’m not going to kill you, Barnes. I never was.” Tony said, before picking up the coffee maker and disappearing from the common area as quickly as humanly possible. Bucky dropped his head to the table. He wanted to cry. He wanted to feel angry that Tony would deny him death. He just wanted to feel **_something_**. Instead, the numb man closed his eyes to let sleep take him, knowing that a nightmare would wake him before morning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *85°F = Almost 30°C
> 
> Tony and Bucky's first real interaction was heartbreaking, but the next chapter will tug at your heartstrings even more.   
> As always, please let me know what you thought! :)


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just wanted to give you a heads up that I may only be able to update on Thursdays for the next 3 weeks. I'm updating a different fic daily throughout the month of December, and with work and the holiday season, I can't promise I'll have as much time for this fic. That being said, this fic is my pride and joy, and I will try to update more than once a week if possible. :)
> 
> If you're into tooth-rotting fluff, Peter Parker, and IronDad, go ahead and check out my 31 Day Fic here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16810642/chapters/39458761
> 
> *Trigger warning: Suicidal Ideation

After Tony’s encounter with Bucky, he went back to his lab to work on the coffee maker he had taken from the kitchen. It only took the genius fifteen minutes to locate the problem and fix it, but the man found himself so distracted by his thoughts that he could not focus on making any additional upgrades to the appliance. At nearly one o’clock, Tony gave up trying to be productive and headed off to bed an hour earlier than planned. Even after he was all cozied up in bed, Tony found himself preoccupied with the conversation he had had with Barnes.

_“He asked me to kill him… does he want to die? If so, why isn’t he taking matters into his own hands? From what I know of Barnes, he’s not a coward. To be fair, all I know of Barnes I heard from Howard, Steve, and History books.  I wouldn’t exactly call any of those sources trustworthy… He looked…sad. Sad and tired. I know how that feels.”_ Tony rolled onto his side and closed his eyes, thoughts of the super soldier continuing to flood his mind until he finally fell asleep.

It was just after six when Tony awoke in a sweat. He trembled beneath the covers, whimpering softly. Tony shifted in order to squeeze his left arm _—_ an attempt to bring himself back to the present. The man had a plethora of recurring nightmares, but the ones pertaining to Sokovia were among the worst. It took him nearly fifteen minutes to calm down enough to drag himself out of bed and into the bathroom for a shower. As the hot water began to relax his muscles, Tony sighed deeply.

_“What I wouldn’t give for a week without any damn nightmares. No—three days. Three days isn’t too much to ask, right?”_ Tony thought in frustration as he grabbed his shower gel. He washed up, and though he was tempted to stand under the warm stream of water until his skin began to prune, the thought of drinking a hot cup of coffee motivated the man to finish quickly. Ten minutes later, he was out of the shower and changed into a white t-shirt and grey sweats as his damp hair began to curl at the ends. Tony slid his feet into some slippers and wrapped a soft fleece blanket around his shoulders before heading to the elevator, taking with him the coffee maker he had fixed the previous night. When he walked into the kitchen, he wasn’t terribly surprised to see Steve sitting at the table; it was about the time the man usually ate breakfast after his morning workout.

“Morning, Tony.”

“Mornin’.” Tony returned, yawning as he shuffled to the counter and set the coffee maker back in its spot.

“I was wondering where that went.” Steve said with a chuckle. “Upgrade it?”

“Nah, it was just too slow. I’ll probably upgrade it soon though.” He said as he started a pot of coffee and pulled two mugs from the cabinet. Steve chewed his toast as he looked at Tony thoughtfully.

“Hey, you didn’t stay up all night again, did you?” There was concern in Steve’s voice, and Tony would be lying if he pretended that it didn’t make him just the tiniest bit happy.

“Nope. Haven’t had my coffee yet so I’m still half-asleep.” Tony said, turning to lean his back against the counter so he was facing the Captain. He stared at the man for a moment before his curiosity got the better of him.

“How’s Barnes doing?” Steve looked surprised by the question.

“I don’t know. I haven’t seen him since we got home yesterday. That…was rough. Friday won’t let me into his room.”

“Did something happen yesterday?” Tony asked, confused by Steve’s response.

“You didn’t hear about it? …Loki did something to Bucky yesterday. I’m not exactly sure what he did—Bucky wouldn’t go into specifics—but it seems Loki forced him to remember something he did not want to think about. I think Bucky was physically in pain. I…can’t say for sure.” Steve said, sighing deeply as he finished his statement.

“What? But Loki’s been so well-behaved since he came back…”

“He said he wanted to make sure Bucky wasn’t planning on hurting you...” The color drained from Tony’s face.

“Steve, I—“

“He also said you knew nothing about it.” Steve cut the other man off before offering him a weary smile. Tony simply nodded, relieved that Steve didn’t think he had something to do with the incident. Silence fell over the men for several moments, Tony not speaking until he turned to pour their coffee.

“I actually had a conversation with Barnes last night.” He said, trying to keep his tone casual.

“You did? When?”

“Around midnight. I came here to get the coffeemaker, and he was sitting down here all alone. In the dark, I might add. Nearly gave me a heart attack when I turned on the light.” Tony said as he moved to sit beside Steve, handing the man a mug.

“Thanks… Bucky was sitting in the dark?”

“Yeah… he, uh, he didn’t look great. That’s why I was wondering if he was all right.”

“He has been so different since he came back. I mean, in the beginning, he seemed a little different, but as time goes on he has become more quiet and distant. It’s not like him at all.”

“What was Barnes like? I mean normally. Before everything.” Tony thought he would never take a genuine interest in anything related to the former assassin. However, after his conversation with Barnes, he found himself unable to stop wondering about the other man. Steve looked surprised by Tony’s question, though he did not hesitate to answer it.

“Bucky…he’s the greatest guy, Tony. Before the serum, I was this skinny little kid that constantly got into fights. Buck…I mean he’s a super soldier now, but he’s really not much bigger than he was before. He was always a brawny guy who was great with his fists. Helped me out of a lot of jams. You know, he was actually a boxing champion before he was drafted?” Steve added off-handedly, staring off into space as he began to reminisce. “He could charm the pants off of just about anyone. Great sense of humor too. Man, he sure was great with the ladies. Girls just loved him. Pretty sure the only reason I ever had a date back then is because Buck would ask two girls to go out with the both of us.” Steve rubbed the back of his neck as he laughed. “He never did find the right girl before the war…I always blamed that on his love for Dinah Shore. He was just crazy about her; always listening to her records and staring at photos of her. You know, we saw her during one of her USO tours in Europe, and I would swear I saw hearts in his eyes just like in the cartoons…” Steve laughed before his eyes went back to Tony and he seemed to realize where he was. “Sorry.” Steve said before taking a sip of his coffee.

“I asked.” Tony responded with a shrug. The two sat without speaking for several minutes before Tony broke the silence.

“He asked me to kill him last night.”

“What?” Steve asked, a mixture of shock and dismay on his face.

“Yeah, I thought I misheard him too. I didn’t.”

“He wanted you to…” The Captain’s voice trailed off.

“Practically begged me…just thought you should know.” Tony said as he stood up and refilled his mug before heading back upstairs, leaving Steve alone with his thoughts.

* * *

 

“Bucky, will you open the door?” The man groaned into his pillow.

“I’m sleeping!” Bucky lied. He had slept at the kitchen table until about three in the morning when he awoke to a nightmare. Bucky had moved back to his room, but he never did manage to fall back asleep.

“If you’re sleeping, you wouldn’t be talking to me.” Steve said from the other side of the door.

“How am I s’posed to sleep with your loud voice keeping me awake?” He didn’t want to sound mean, and he definitely didn’t want to hurt Steve, but he just needed to be alone.

“Come on. I talked to Tony. I’m worried, Buck. Won’t you talk to me for a few minutes?” The man froze. Had Stark told Steve that Bucky had asked the man to kill him? He must have if Steve was worried. Now Bucky **_definitely_** could not face his friend.

“Miss Friday…” Bucky whispered softly. A moment later, he heard Friday tell Steve again that the man was not allowed to enter his friend’s room. She asked him to stop disturbing Bucky, and he finally heard Steve’s dejected footsteps fade away. The man buried himself under his covers and stared blankly at the ceiling, wishing for death to take him.

* * *

 

At Peter’s request, everyone in the tower gathered together that evening for pizza and board games. Everyone except for Bucky, that is. Peter had insisted on playing “What do you Meme?”, and he was trying to explain memes to the older heroes who, aside from Clint, Sam, and Vision, did not understand them.

“Okay so ** _basically_** all you need to know for this game is that a meme is when you take a picture and put words on it that make it funny and relatable.” Peter explained as he opened up the game box.

“But what if the picture can’t be made funny or relatable?” Natasha asked, brow furrowed in concentration.

“That doesn’t matter, Nat. Anything can be made funny or relatable. You’d be surprised.” Clint said, and the woman nodded seriously.

“Are these those weird pictures you’re forever texting me?” Tony asked. Peter grinned and nodded. “You know, those things waste so much space on my phone, Kid.” Peter rolled his eyes, knowing his mentor’s words were a blatant lie.

“You ever show him any of his memes?” Sam asked, and Peter shook his head before smirking in Tony’s direction.

“Tony doesn’t need a bigger head than he already has.” Sam laughed and high-fived the teenager as Tony feigned offense.

“I’m hurt, Spiderkid.” The man said before raising his eyebrow. “So...I have memes? Should I be flattered?”

“Tony, you are a walking meme.” Clint said. Tony was unsure if he should take that as a compliment or as offensive.

“Yeah, you really are.” Peter agreed. Since Peter agreed, Tony shrugged it off, considering it to be complimentary.

“Show me some.” Tony said, and Peter grinned.

“Wait, this will actually be a great example for everyone.” Peter said as he grabbed his phone. Within thirty seconds he pulled up a picture of Tony rolling his eyes with his arms crossed over his chest.

“Hey, I remember that. Pretty sure that was taken when Sam told me that he could fly faster in his wings than I could in my suit.”

“Oh, ha-ha, Stark.” Sam said sarcastically.

“ANYWAY,” Peter started again, “People can put different words on this picture to make it funny and relatable. See? This one says ‘The face you make when the person you hate is talking.’” Peter said as he held up his phone to show the others. Tony laughed in delight.

 “Wait, give me your phone. I want to see more of these.” Tony said, reaching for the teen's phone. Peter held his phone out of his mentor’s reach, sticking his tongue out at the man.

“ ** _After_** we play! You guys all get it?”

“Well, let’s just start and see how we do.” Bruce said, looking worriedly down at the cards that Peter had dealt him. They started the game and, once the others got the hang of it, the laughter was endless. The group played for nearly an hour before Steve re-appeared, having gone downstairs to check on his friend.

“Everything okay?” Natasha asked as Steve sat down beside her.

“Tried for an hour. He won’t budge—not even to eat.” Steve said despondently. “Bucky won’t even answer me anymore; he has Friday tell me to leave him alone.”

“Hey, Peter, why don’t we make that the last round? We could put on a movie?” Natasha suggested softly, and the boy agreed immediately because Natasha asked him to—not for Steve’s sake. As Peter glanced at Steve, he felt an overwhelming surge of overprotectiveness for Tony. The boy grabbed a blanket off the back of the couch before plopping down next to his mentor. He covered them both with the blanket and wedged himself under the man’s arm as the others watched in amusement.

“Okay, I’m ready.” Peter announced.

“Well, I certainly hope you’re comfortable.” Tony said with a chuckle.

“I am, thank you.” The boy said cheekily, and everyone laughed softly as Natasha switched on a lighthearted comedy she knew the others would enjoy. Peter hugged his mentor tightly throughout the movie, and Tony loved every second of it. However, about halfway through the film, the billionaire realized that his mind kept wandering back to Bucky. Was he actually worried about Barnes of all people? Despite the intense fear and hatred that Tony had for the Winter Soldier, it was now clear to him that the assassin truly was no more. He had seen the desperation in the other man’s eyes. Barnes did want death; there was no doubt about that. Tony thought back to what Steve had said about the Sergeant’s personality before his time with Hydra. If that really was what the man had once been, and not what Steve had seen through rose-colored glasses, Barnes truly was in a dark place. Tony knew all too well what it was like to be blamed for things you had no control over. Suddenly, it occurred to him that perhaps the reason he had found Barnes in the kitchen so late at night was due to the man trying to avoid a nightmare. After a few more moments lost in thought, Tony tapped Peter’s side.

“Hey, Petey. Let me up for a minute.”

“Why? I’ll come with you.”

“I don’t think I need any help in the bathroom, Bud. But thanks just the same.” Tony teased. With a small pout, Peter reluctantly pulled away to let the man up. Tony headed out of the living room and down the hall, ensuring he was out of earshot of the others.

“Hey, Friday?”

“Yes, Boss?”

“Can you, uh…do me a favor?”

“You know that I can.” Tony rolled his eyes.

“Find some of Dinah Shore’s songs. Play them for Sergeant Barnes. Nothing after ’43.” Tony said, knowing that the man would not recognize any songs from after that time.

“Boss, the Sergeant said that—“

“Just play them, Friday. You can stop it if he asks you to...it might help him...or something. I don’t know. Music helps me.”

“Yes, Boss.” Tony scratched the back of his head awkwardly before shrugging and returning back to the living room.

* * *

 

Bucky had not left his room for the entire day, and he had not spoken to anyone—except to tell Steve to leave him alone. The man had slept for a combined total of seven hours in the past three nights, and it was beginning to take its toll on him. The lack of sleep, combined with his guilt, pain, and regret, caused Bucky to spiral into an even deeper depression than he had already been experiencing. He had spent most of the day staring at the ceiling, trying his hardest to think of absolutely nothing. That was much easier said than done, and by early evening, he found himself clutching his soft blanket for comfort as he silently cried into it. Steve had tried to get him to come out of his room again, but this time Bucky did not even acknowledge his friend, asking Friday to once more get rid of the man. As he heard Steve walk away, he breathed a slight sigh of relief before his anguish consumed his mind once again.

_“I can’t live like this. I just can’t. I know that Stark said he won’t kill me—he must have figured out how much it hurts. He must want me to feel this. I don’t blame him, but I just can’t, I—“_ The man took a shaky breath as he glanced at yesterday’s clothing, which was lying on the floor, his eyes falling onto his belt. He walked over and picked it up, his fingers running over the smooth buckle gently. Bucky moved back to his bed and dropped the belt onto it before looking through the drawers in his room. After a few minutes, he finally found what he had been searching for: a pen and a pad of paper. He returned to sit on the edge of his bed, writing out a note to Tony:

_Stark,_

_I’m sorry that I was the one who took your parents from you. No kid should have to lose their parents so young. I don’t blame you for not being able to forgive me. I wouldn’t be able to forgive me either. I know you want me to stay alive and endure the suffering that I deserve, but I truly can’t handle another day here. Hell would be better than this. Please try to understand._

_I’m sorry._

_Bucky Barnes_

After he finished his note to Tony, he also wrote one for Steve:

_Dear Steve,_

_You’re the greatest guy I ever knew. Even before the serum, I’ve never met anyone with half the spunk you have. I know I’ve been a disappointment since I returned. It’s like the Soldier stole Bucky when he was erased, and I can’t seem to find him. The more I look for him, the more he disappears. You deserve friends as honorable as you are. I think you have that here. You don’t need me anymore. Please don’t be sad about losing me. I’ll be happier once I’m gone._

_I know I promised that I’d be with you ‘til the end of the line, but I think my line ends here. Just know that if anyone ever gives you trouble, I promise to come out of the pits of Hell to haunt them for you. I love you, Stevie._

_Bucky_

Bucky was trembling, his tears beginning to stain the short notes he had written. He leaned over and placed both letters carefully onto his nightstand before he sat back, moving his fingers to run over the soft blanket beneath him. He lifted his eyes, looking around the room for some beam or hook that would be strong enough to support his weight. As he was doing this, the man was suddenly startled by loud music. Bucky looked around quickly, trying to locate the source of the sound until his eyes widened in recognition as a woman’s smoky voice filled the air.

_You’d be so nice to come home to. You’d be so nice by the fire._

“Dinah?” He gasped softly as he looked around once more, wondering if he was imagining the music.

_While the breeze on high sang a lullaby, you’d be all that I could desire._

Tears rolled down the man’s cheeks as he closed his eyes and was taken back in time to Europe, 1943. It had been decades since Bucky had thought of the night he had seen his favorite singing star perform her new hit for the troops, but the memory returned to Bucky just as vividly as if it were only the night before. He unconsciously moved his arms up, hugging himself tightly. After a brief moment, Bucky opened his eyes and looked up at the ceiling.

“Miss Friday, do you hear music?”

“Yes, Sergeant. I was requested to play Dinah Shore for you.” Confusion was written across Bucky’s tear-stained face.

“But I don’t see… it doesn’t sound like a record…how did Steve…?”

“You’re mistaken, Sergeant. Captain Rogers did not make the request. Boss did.”

“Boss…? Stark?” Bucky asked, jaw dropping in surprise.

“Yes, Sergeant.”

“But…why?”

“He did not specify. He just said that music helps him. Would you like me to turn it off?”

“…No.” Bucky said, voice barely above a whisper.

_Under stars chilled by the winter, Under an August moon burning above,_

Bucky sat in stunned silence, listening to a beloved song that he thought had been lost to time. Why, of all people, was Tony Stark the one allowing him to hear it again? All at once, everything became clear to Bucky, and the man broke down as violent sobs wracked his body. He pushed the belt off of his bed as he turned to muffle the sound of his crying into the pillows behind him. The former assassin still felt everything he had been feeling—the depression, the guilt, the worthlessness—but he had also just been given the most wonderful gift of his entire life. One he believed he did not deserve, but one he would not hesitate to accept. Bucky did not know how, he did not know why, but Tony Stark had forgiven him.

_You’d be so nice, you’d be paradise, to come home to and love._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact: The song that ends up playing for Bucky is actually what inspired this entire story.
> 
> I'm a huge fan of WWII era entertainment, Dinah Shore being one of my favorite female singers. One cool night in October, I was visiting my parents and we had a bonfire. This song came on while we were sitting around the fire, and for some reason, I began to imagine Bucky listening to this song during the war. Then it became my headcanon that Bucky is a huge fan of Dinah Shore. That snowballed into this story, and I felt so inspired that I sat down to write fanfiction for the first time in seven years. 
> 
> If you want to hear the song, here's a link to it. I made the mistake of listening to it as I edited the final scene. Unless you need a good cry, don't make the same mistake I did. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2w5KNm1LQ78
> 
>  


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, everyone. I want to apologize again for how late this chapter is. I felt so terribly guilty that I was unable to edit this chapter and post it by Thursday, but sometimes things just happen in life that can't be controlled... That being said, I want to give a huge shoutout to Grimmorie, F_friend, whatsanaccounttoagod, AnnaDruvez, Elenorasweet, April71, Chezakeeba, McdannoToretto1993, and Asiyah22 for leaving such sweet, encouraging comments on the author's note I posted. I did delete it so I could not respond to your comments individually, but I want you all to know how much better they made me feel. :) All that being said, enjoy the chapter!
> 
> [If you are also following my Peter Parker fic that is to be updated daily this month, all of those chapters will be uploaded all at once later today once they have been edited. :) ]

Bucky slept for nearly twelve hours before waking up—his first dreamless night since coming out of the deep freeze. As soon as he woke up, the man went into the bathroom and downed two glasses of water before shedding his clothes and stepping into the shower. As he turned the faucet on and felt the stream of warm water wash over him, Bucky looked down at his metal hand.

_“What if I got everything wrong last night? Stark could be messing with me…after all, psychological torture is even worse than physical torture…he seems like someone who would understand that…How did he know that I love Dinah Shore? And where did he find her records? Shuri said that people don’t even use records anymore… Maybe…maybe he really does forgive me...”_  Bucky ran his fingers through his wet hair, sighing deeply. He felt far more stable after a full night’s sleep, but the turmoil he continued to feel made him want to scream in frustration.

_“All right, Barnes. You just need to confront Stark. Ask him what he meant by playing that music last night. At least you can find out his angle.”_ The man’s pep talk lasted only a brief moment before he slumped against the slick wall of the shower, slowly sliding down it until he was sitting on the wet floor. _“Find out his angle? He doesn’t owe me anything. If he wants to torture me, he has every right to…but still…I need to know. I can at least ask him, right?”_ Bucky stood up quickly, his stomach churning anxiously at the thought of speaking with the other man. Deciding to confront Tony before he lost his nerve, the man abruptly ended his shower and grabbed a towel as he went to search for clean clothes. Despite it being summertime, Bucky quickly donned a hoodie and sweatpants found in his closet, marveling at how soft the clothing felt against his skin. After running a comb through his damp hair, he sat down onto his bed as he slid his feet into the slippers Steve had given him.

“Miss Friday?”

“Yes, Sergeant?”

“Do you know where your boss is?”

“He is in his lab, Sergeant.”

“How do I get there?”

“Very few people are allowed access to his lab, and I am afraid that you aren’t one of them.”

“Oh, I see…” Bucky’s shoulders slumped as he chewed thoughtfully at his bottom lip, silence filling the room for a moment until Friday spoke again.

“I have alerted boss that you were looking for him. He said that he can meet you in the lounge if—“

“I’m sorry, Miss Friday, but I need to speak with him alone.”

“I see.” Silence followed again, though it was much longer than it had been previously. Bucky had just about given up hope that Tony would agree to speak with him when Friday spoke once more.

“Boss says that he will meet you on the observation deck.”

“Can you please guide me there, Miss Friday?”

“Of course, Sergeant. The helipad you arrived on is located on the observation deck. Please follow my directions.”

“Thank you.” Bucky said softly. As the man stood up, he glanced at the floor, noticing the tear-stained notes he had written the night before. He stooped down to pick them up and moved to throw them in the small trash can beside his bed. After a brief moment of hesitation, Bucky turned back to his nightstand, placing the notes into the top drawer before apprehensively heading off for the observation deck.

* * *

 

 Tony was having a wonderful morning. It did start off with a nightmare, but considering that it did not wake him until 6 AM, the man counted it as a win. He had been very productive in the few hours he had been up, having gone straight to his lab the moment he rolled out of bed. As usual, Tony lost all track of time—off in his own little world until Friday’s voice brought him back to reality.

“Boss, Sergeant Barnes is looking for you.” Tony froze in surprise.

“Are you sure he’s not looking for Steve?”

“He specifically asked for you.” Tony frowned nervously, panic rising in his chest. Though he no longer saw the Winter Soldier when he looked at the Sergeant, he was still uncomfortable with the idea of interacting with the man. However, his curiosity won out in the end as he wondered why Barnes would possibly be looking for him.

“Uh, I could meet him in the lounge.”

“Yes, Boss.” As Tony was taking his last sip of coffee before heading to the common area, Friday spoke again.

“Sergeant Barnes says that he needs to speak with you privately.”

“…Why?”

“I am not sure. Should I ask him to specify?”

“No. Just let me think for a minute.” He said as he held up his hand.

_“Why on earth does Barnes want to speak with me privately? Is he going to attack me? I mean, okay… I know that he is no longer under Hydra’s control. He’s not an assassin anymore, but all those years of being brainwashed definitely messed with his mind. The man’s unpredictable. An unpredictable super soldier…Yeah, that’s not terrifying.”_ Tony thought sarcastically before tilting his head to the side. _“What does he want though? I mean, a conversation with him could go in a lot of different directions… I don’t want him here, and I sure as hell don’t want to have him on my floor. In the off chance he were to attack me, Peter would definitely put himself in the middle of it. I don’t want to deal with that today…hmm…the observation deck…yeah. That’s safe. I doubt he’d attack me up there—even a super soldier would suffer irreparable damage from a fall that high. It’s also open, so I can suit up and leave if necessary…”_ The billionaire sighed deeply as he rubbed his face, suddenly feeling tired. _“Would he even attack me though? He seemed so…weary the other night. What exactly does he want with me?”_ The more he wondered about it, the more curious the man became.

“Okay, Friday. Tell him to meet me on the observation deck.” Tony finally said as he stood up from his stool and headed toward the elevator.

Within a few minutes, Tony was on up on the deck, admiring his view of the city. As he heard the elevator door open and footsteps approach, Tony closed his eyes; taking a deep breath before opening his eyes again as he slowly exhaled. When the other man entered his peripheral vision, Tony nodded coolly in acknowledgment of the Sergeant’s presence.

“Great view, isn’t it?” Tony asked, not turning to look at the other man. He watched Bucky out of the corner of his eye, noting that the Sergeant seemed surprised by his question.

“Yeah…New York got even prettier since I last saw her.” Bucky replied softly. Both men silently gazed at the cityscape for several moments before Tony finally turned to face the Sergeant.

“What do you want, Barnes?” The former assassin swallowed hard before tearing his eyes away from the skyline. He looked at Tony, and the genius couldn’t help but notice the nervousness Bucky’s eyes held.

“…Why did you play that music in my room last night?” Tony was taken aback by the question; he had thought of several different things the man might have wanted to discuss, but music was not one of them.

“I…uh…I mean, you seemed upset.” Tony stammered in bewilderment. Bucky seemed oblivious to the other man’s confusion.

“But…why? Why do you care if I’m upset?”

“Geez, Barnes, how heartless do you think I am?” Tony quipped, quickly regaining his assertive demeanor. Bucky was clearly startled by his response, and Tony raised a brow. “Clearly very heartless…”

“No—“ Bucky said quickly, not wishing to offend the other man. “I just don’t understand…why…I mean…” The Sergeant paused for a moment before turning his eyes downward, unable to look at the younger man. “…I killed your parents.” Tony sniffed, a lump forming in his throat as he silently observed the super soldier for several moments. Guilt radiated off the other man, and suddenly, Bucky’s behavior began to make sense.

_“He feels guilty…He was the cause of so many deaths he didn’t want. Everyone blames him.”_ The feeling was something so incredibly familiar to Tony that he found he couldn’t help but sympathize with the former assassin _. “I guess when he killed mom, Hydra was messing up his life almost as much as they messed up mine.”_ Tony continued to stare at Bucky, feeling terribly conflicted. He had spent so many years hating the man in front of him, only to realize that the people who truly deserved his hatred were the ones who had controlled him. Lost in his thoughts, Tony remained silent until Bucky finally cast him a nervous glance. Only then, did Tony realize that he had been silent for an unusually long amount of time.

“You didn’t do it. Hydra did.” Tony said with a sniff, finally breaking the silence as he turned to look back at New York’s sprawling skyline. Bucky looked up at Tony, a myriad of feelings written across his face all at once. He stared in a stunned silence for so long that it began to make the genius feel incredibly uncomfortable. Tony stole a quick glance at Bucky, his eyes meeting the misty, grey eyes of the super soldier. The billionaire cleared his throat, shifting his gaze back to the view. “When I attacked you in Siberia…it hadn’t sunk in yet. Until that moment, I had always thought my parents died in a car accident. Then I saw the video of you...and I was hurt because I felt lied to—well that’s another story—I guess I’m trying to apologize for attacking you.”

“Wha—you don’t need to apologize! I deserve it…I…I…” Bucky trailed off, the other man’s words both shocking and confusing him. He paused for a few moments before taking a deep breath. “Are…did you…forgive me?” He finally asked, his voice betraying the hopefulness he felt.

“No.” Tony said, and Bucky’s face fell, though he was not at all surprised. He knew that he did not deserve forgiveness. As Bucky began to mentally berate himself, Tony continued. “I don’t forgive you because there is nothing to forgive. It was Hydra. End of discussion.” Tony said, not wanting to spend a minute longer than he had to thinking about his mother’s death. Bucky stared at the other man catatonically, and Tony became so uncomfortable that he took a step backward, clearing his throat once again. “Did you need something else, or are we done here?” When Bucky didn’t reply, Tony turned to leave the deck as quickly as possible.

“Stark!” Tony heard after a moment. He glanced back over his shoulder at Bucky as he was about to step into the elevator. “Where did you get records?”

“What?”

“Dinah Shore…I heard that people today don’t use records.”

“…You still have a lot to learn about the future, Barnes.” Tony said, the slightest hint of amusement in his voice. “You can hear any song you like. Just ask Friday.” He said before stepping into the elevator. As the doors shut, Tony leaned against the wall, feeling considerably more relaxed than he had in quite a while. Barnes might behave irrationally at times, but the soldier didn’t seem as if he planned to hurt him or his family. As Tony realized this, relief washed over him. He didn’t trust the super soldier—not by a long shot. However, the sincerity Tony felt from the other man helped to put a small part of his mind at ease.

* * *

 

The moment Tony left the observation deck, Bucky fell to his knees, tears spilling down over his cheeks. He was overcome with so many different emotions that it exhausted him almost immediately, and he found himself lying down on the roof in the fetal position. He lay there for an unknown amount of time, crying until he could shed tears no longer.

The man closed his eyes, greedily soaking up the warmth of the summer sun as he snuggled deeper into his hoodie. During his time as the Winter Soldier, the man had known not a single comfort. His clothing had been made from black leather, and the only human contact he had received was far from pleasant. Warmth was an unknown feeling. If he was not being forced to kill, he was being tortured in a cold laboratory or put into a freezer to keep him from aging. After seven decades of physical and psychological abuse, the simple act of lying in the sun while wearing soft clothing felt inexplicably wonderful to the man. Combined with what Tony Stark had said to him earlier, Bucky felt as if he were in Heaven. A surge of happiness bubbled up inside of his heart before quickly being replaced by the ever-present shadow of self-doubt and guilt that resided inside of him. He did believe that the billionaire was sincere in his words, but Bucky curled into himself as he began to question how he could live with himself for what he had done.

_“How can I feel happy? I took away the happiness of so many others. I don’t deserve it…I just…but Tony Stark himself said that Hydra did those things. It wasn’t me. I killed his parents with my own two hands, and he says I don’t need to be forgiven because I did nothing wrong… I didn’t want to kill his parents… I didn’t want to kill any of them.”_ The man hugged himself and closed his eyes as he continued to lay in the sun, attempting to quiet the fight happening inside his mind.

“Hey, are you okay?” Bucky jerked away from the voice in surprise, eyes widened with a mixture of fear and surprise as he caught sight of a bright red face beside him. As he focused on the lithe figure, Bucky watched as the boy reached up and pulled off the red mask covering his face. “Sergeant Barnes, it’s just me.”

“Peter…” Bucky said as recognition filled his eyes.

“Sergeant Barnes, why are you laying out here? It’s so hot I had to cut my morning patrol short…and you’re in sweats too?”

“It feels nice.” Peter gave the man a strange look as he sat down beside him.

“You’re sweating.” The man just shrugged and Peter tilted his head. “Why are you up here, anyway? Captain Rogers said you wouldn’t leave your room.”

“I just came up here to meet someone.” When Peter gave him another questioning look, Bucky continued. “I just had a talk with Stark.” Peter looked surprised before furrowing his brow.

“Why?” The gentle boy’s suddenly demanding tone caught the super soldier off guard. “Is he okay?”

“Peter…” Bucky began softly, unable to keep the pain he felt from entering his voice. “I didn’t hurt him. I promise.” Upon hearing the man’s hurt tone, Peter softened considerably.

“Sorry, Sergeant Barnes… I didn’t mean it like that. I never thought you would. It’s just that Tony sometimes gets upset around you because…well…you know.” The boy said awkwardly.

“You…know what I did? But Steve said that nobody else…”

“Well **_Captain America_** doesn’t know everything, does he?” Peter asked angrily before realizing how rude he sounded. He ran his fingers through his fluffy curls and let out a sigh. “Sorry…”

“It’s alright.” The two sat in silence for a few moments before Peter turned to the man beside him. As he looked closer, he noticed how red the man’s eyes were.

“Are you okay, Sergeant Barnes?”

“The truth?”

“Yep.”

“I don’t know.” Peter frowned, studying the other man for a few moments before scooting closer. Bucky’s eyes widened in surprise as Peter wrapped his arms around the other man, hugging him tightly. Since arriving in America, not a single person had touched him aside from Steve and Loki. While Steve’s hugs had been comforting at first, Bucky had found himself increasingly uncomfortable in the presence of his best friend who continued to insist that he was the exact same man he had been seventy years ago. As for Loki, Bucky could happily live the rest of his life without being touched again by the god. Peter’s touch was different; it was not to make himself feel better or to try to get something from Bucky. Peter was trying to make him feel better. When Bucky realized this, he practically melted into the boy’s arms. Though the young hero wanted nothing more than to go back into the air-conditioned tower, he hugged the man for several minutes before slowly pulling away.

“I don’t really know much about what happened to you during all those years Hydra had you, but it must have really sucked a lot.”

“…it was horrible.”

“Sometimes talking about it helps.”

“I’m not ready. Don’t know if I ever will be.”

“That’s okay. Sometimes hugs help more than words anyway.” Bucky turned to give Peter a small smile.

“It really did help. Thank you.” Peter beamed at the man’s words.

“You can come find me if ever need a hug. I always have plenty to spare.” Peter offered as he stood to his feet and held out his hand to help Bucky up.

“Come inside, Sergeant Barnes. You’ll get sick if you stay in this heat much longer.”

“On one condition.”

“What’s that?” Peter tilted his head curiously.

“No more Sergeant Barnes. Just ‘Bucky’ okay?”

“Geez, just trying to be polite, but all the adults in my life don’t like it.” Peter teased as he pulled the other man up. “Okay, Bucky.”

“Thanks.” Bucky hesitated for a moment before speaking up again. “Peter…there’s something I’d really like to do…but I don’t know how to do it. If…you’re not busy, could you help me?”

“Of course! What is it?”

“I want to see my best girl.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Peter Parker is a cinnamon roll.


	15. Chapter Fifteen

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Read my end note after you finish the chapter, please. (At least the first part of it.)
> 
> Also thank you to Jessica S, whatsanaccounttoagod, IchBinEs, WintersGoddess, elenorasweet, F_friend, FluentFlowers,Purple_duckyoo, Yen, Persephone, Marcisprinkles, Derpy505, and zainababadin for the supportive comments. ♥♥♥ (And thank you to everyone who quietly supports me as well! ♥)

“Tony!” Peter called out as he jogged into the man’s lab. Tony looked up from his work and smiled.

“Hey, Bud. You’re back early. Everything safe in Queens?”

“Yeah, it’s too hot and disgusting for anyone to be out causing trouble. Anyway, you know King T’Challa, right? Can I have his phone number?” Peter tried to asked casually.

“Why?” Tony questioned, raising an eyebrow.

“Uh, to call him?” The genius rolled his eyes at the teen’s answer.

“Yeah, I got that. Why do you need to call T’Challa?”

“Um…” Peter sighed after a moment when he could not think of a single reason he would need the king’s phone number. “I just need it.”

“Sorry, Kid. No can do.”

“Please, Tony. I promise I have a good reason!”

“Then why can’t you tell me what that reason is?” Peter bit his bottom lip, staring in silence for a moment before he sighed deeply.

“Okay, don’t freak out.” The teen said as he moved closer, putting a comforting hand on Tony’s shoulder. “I need it for Sergeant Barnes. He misses the royal family and he doesn’t know how to video chat with them. He asked for my help. Don’t be mad, okay?”

“I’m not mad, Peter. We talked earlier. It’s okay.”

“Well, he said you talked too. He said you were fine, but I still don’t want to give you anxiety or anything.” Tony smiled softly, reaching out to squeeze Peter’s arm.

“I promise I’m okay. Now let me find you that number.” Tony said quickly, not in the mood to talk about his feelings. The man pulled out his phone and scrolled through his contacts before grabbing a pen and a tissue; which was the first paper he could find on his workbench. “You gotta promise me you’re going to be responsible with this. I don’t need the king of the most advanced nation in the world pissed off at me because he starts getting prank calls from a high schooler.” He teased as he wrote the number out onto the tissue.

“Oh darn, guess I’ll have to stop production on those giant King T’Challa posters I was planning on posting all over my school.” Peter said sarcastically as he took the tissue from the billionaire.

“You’ve been spending too much time with me.” The man said with a smirk.

“No such thing, Tony!” Peter said as he began to back out of the room. “This afternoon we’re finally going to have that Mario Party tie-breaker.”

“Are we?” Tony asked in amusement.

“We are. Unless you’re too afraid to admit that you’re **_not_ ** the Mario Party Master.” Peter challenged, a smug grin on his face.

“All right, Kid. You’re on.”

* * *

 

 “I got it!” Peter said as he ran straight into Bucky’s room, unaware that he was now the only other person in the tower granted access to the former assassin’s quarters.

“He gave it to you?” Bucky asked in surprise, his features softening into a smile.

“Yep! I told you he would. You didn’t have to worry.”

“I just really don’t want to cause him any trouble…” Bucky began, but Peter waved the man’s thought away before grabbing his phone from his pocket and holding it up.

“You don’t have one yet, right?”

“No…do I need one?”

“You definitely do. But for now, you can use mine. Have you ever done a video chat before?”

“No. I did call Steve’s number from Shuri’s phone though.”

“Okay,” Peter said as he plopped down onto the bed beside Bucky. “It’s pretty much the same. But instead of hitting the picture that looks like a phone, you hit the one that looks like a camera.” The teen pointed to the tiny hole above the screen. “That’s your front-facing camera. That’s how the person you call can see you.”

“Shuri’s phone had two cameras. Does yours too?” The man asked, brow furrowing in concentration.

“Yep. I think all phones do these days.” Peter flipped his phone over to show Bucky the camera on the back. “You can use this one when you’re on a video call too. I’ll show you how. That way you can show the person what you’re seeing if you want to give them a tour of your room or something.”

“Why would I want to give someone a tour of my room?”

“It’s fun to see someone else’s room. You can see how they decorate and what things they like. It’s pretty popular online too. Most Youtubers do at least one room tour eventually. They are actually really fun to watch.”

“Oh… is that so you can get a feel of their aesthetic?” Peter blinked for a moment, slightly surprised by the question.

“Yeah, I guess so.”

“Maybe you can show me one of those tours later…Shuri showed me the Youtubers. I’m still not, uh…” For the first time since he had returned to America, Bucky was trying to remember everything that the Wakandan Princess had taught him. “I’m not woke to everything in this century yet, but I am trying. Luckily, Shuri was a great teacher. She told me that she has a PhD in memes, and I…” Bucky trailed off when he realized that Peter was staring at him, a strange expression on the boy’s face. “Did I say anything wrong?” The man asked, worried that he had possibly said something incorrectly.

“No...I’m just shook af. I’m not trying to be extra, but you using ‘woke’ correctly in a sentence literally snatched my weave.” Peter said, wanting to see if Bucky would understand him.

“Yeah?” Bucky asked, his smile growing a bit bigger. When Peter realized that the man did, in fact, understand him, he bit his bottom lip and tried not to laugh out loud.

“Yeah. I’ll show you how to call now…But PLEASE let me meet the princess? Just for a second!”

“Of course you can meet her.” Bucky said as if it should be obvious to the boy; after all, Peter had helped him out so much that the man was happy to oblige such a simple request. The teen grinned as he dialed the number, holding the phone up to show Bucky how it was done. Suddenly, the ringing stopped and a barely awake T’Challa appeared on the phone’s screen. Peter, who was still holding his phone, stared at the king with wide eyes.

“Who are you?” The king asked, clearly confused. “This is a private number… how did you get it?”

“Sorry, T’Challa. He’s helping me call you.” Bucky said as he leaned closer to Peter to look at the screen. When the super soldier moved in front of the camera, the King’s eyes widened before a smile spread across his face.

“Bucky! How is life in America?”

“Oh, it’s good.” The man lied. “How are you? Is everyone doing well?”

“Everyone here is doing very well. Though we all miss you. Mother is still brooding the loss of her White Wolf.” A sad smile spread across Bucky’s face as he looked at T’Challa.

“I miss all of you too…were you sleeping?” Bucky asked as he suddenly noticed how tired his friend appeared.

“It is after one o’clock in the morning here.” T’Challa said, though he showed no signs of irritation at being woken up in the middle of the night. Bucky’s eyes widened.

“T’Challa, I am so sorry. I don’t know what I was thinking. I completely forgot about the time difference.” The man said, guilt suddenly gnawing at the pit of his stomach.

“Don’t apologize. It was worth it to speak with you. I wish it could be for longer, but I am afraid that I have a very important meeting to attend in the morning.”

“Oh, of course…Shuri’s not still up is she?”

“I believe she is asleep, let me go wake her up.”

“Oh, you don’t need to get up or bother her!” Bucky protested, but T’Challa laughed as he exited his room and began walking down the dark hallways of the palace.

“Did you already forget the joy that pestering her can bring?” The man teased. Bucky smiled instantly at the playfulness in his friend’s voice. “Besides, if I tell her that you called and didn’t wake her up, Wakanda will need to find a new king.” T'Challa laughed before his voice softened. “She misses you very much, Bucky.”

“I miss her too.” The super soldier said softly before T’Challa indicated for him to be quiet. Peter and Bucky watched as the king slipped into a dark room. He set the phone on a nearby table and adjusted the camera before flipping on the lights. As Peter and Bucky watched the screen, they saw T’Challa sit beside his sleeping sister as he loudly clapped his hands.

“Wake up, Dear Sister!” Shuri bolted upright, looking around with widened eyes. When she noticed T’Challa she blinked several times before looking to the darkened window. Finally, her eyes moved down to the clock beside her bed, eyes widening when she saw the time. Shuri looked up at her brother, initially worried at being awakened at such a strange hour. However, when she saw her brother’s smug appearance, she scowled.

“What is wrong with you, Brother? I don’t care if you are the King! I will throw you out that window! Not even Okoye can stop me!” She fumed angrily as T’Challa calmly got up and walked back to the table to retrieve his phone. The man turned back toward his sister, an amused grin on his face.

“Well, if you will not even listen to Okoye, there is only one other person who may be able to plead for forgiveness on my behalf.” T’Challa said as he turned his phone around to show Shuri the screen.

“Come on, Princess. Give your brother a break. I made him get out of bed in the middle of the night just so I could see my best girl.” Bucky said, a genuine smile spreading across his face the moment he saw Shuri on the screen.

“Bucky!” Shuri squealed, her face brightening up as she snatched T’Challa’s phone from his hands. “I’ve missed you so much! How is New York?”

“It’s crazy being back.” Bucky said, trying not to let his smile falter in front of Shuri. T’Challa leaned close to his sister in order to be captured on camera once again. I do need to sleep, but let us talk again soon, Bucky.

“I would love that. I’m sorry again that I woke you up.” The king put a hand up, shaking his head gently.

“Think nothing of it.” Suddenly, Shuri began to walk away with the phone, retrieving her own from her bedside table.

“I will transfer the call. Wait just one moment.” The princess said, quickly transferring the call to her own phone before handing T’Challa’s phone back to him.

“Does this mean I won’t be thrown out the window? The King asked his sister. The girl side-eyed him playfully.

“Yes, not tonight anyway.” Shuri replied with a smirk. Her brother shook his head, laughing to himself as he shuffled out of her room.

“Bucky, tell me everything! I want to know what you have—“ Shuri squinted at the screen as the camera caught Peter’s shoulder. “Who is there with you?”

“Oh!” Bucky moved the phone a bit so that Peter was also shown on the screen with him. The teen smiled and waved somewhat awkwardly at the princess. “This is Peter. He helped me call you tonight.”

“Hey, it’s nice to meet you.” The girl said before pausing briefly, tilting her head to the side. “You’re not Tony Stark’s Peter, are you?” The teen widened his eyes in surprise.

“Uh, I mean… I guess that’s me.” Peter said, his cheeks flushing ever so slightly. “Tony told you about me?”

“He mentioned you often during his last visit. It’s nice to finally meet you.” Shuri said warmly.

“Yeah, you too! …I’m gonna leave in a minute so you can talk with Bucky…but after he told me that you have a PhD in memes and that you were helping him stay woke, I just had to meet you.” The boy said, biting back a laugh. A smug grin spread across the girl’s face as she also tried not to laugh.

“Is it safe to assume that you too have a PhD in memes?” Shuri asked pointedly.

“It is.” Peter said with a grin. Bucky looked at him in surprise.

“You have a PhD too? Geez, I’m surrounded by little geniuses.” Shuri and Peter exchanged a look as they struggled to maintain their composure.

“Well, I’d better go. Lots of stuff to do and all.” Peter said quickly, wanting to leave before he burst into laughter.

“Wait! Should I want to discuss anything later…” The princess glanced at Bucky before looking back at Peter. “You know, **_meme-related._** Where do I contact you?” Peter grinned, already excited to hear the details of Shuri’s ongoing troll.

“He’s on my phone now. Just text me whenever. See ya!” The teen said as he began to snicker before bolting out of the room. Bucky glance toward the door before looking back at the screen.

“I’ve really missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too.” Shuri said, her smile softening as she spoke.  “Don’t tell T’Challa, but you’re more fun than he is.” Bucky laughed and shook his head.

“I won’t tell, but you’re lying. I’m not all that fun.”

“You are, and I miss it. I no longer have anyone to tease for their child-like awe of basic technology.”

“Watch it, Princess. I may look young, but I’m old enough to be your grandfather.”

“Who said you looked young?” Shuri asked with an evil grin. Bucky scoffed in mock offense.

“Can you remind me why I thought I missed you? I can’t seem to remember right now.” Shuri stuck her tongue out at the camera before suddenly snapping her fingers.

“I need to tell you what T’Challa did yesterday.” Shuri spoke quickly, telling Bucky in detail about a prank that she had pulled on her older brother the day before. Bucky listened with great interest, and after Shuri had finished her amusing anecdote, the two continued to talk for over an hour before Bucky decided to end the call.

“Shuri, it’s nearly three o’clock there. You need to sleep.”

“I’m fine! I can talk more.”

“Nope.” Bucky said, though he would have loved nothing more than to continue their conversation. “Come on, Doll. I’m sure you have a lot of work to do tomorrow, right? We can talk soon. I’ll get my own phone, and then we can do this again.”

“Yeah?” The girl asked before shrugging reluctantly. “All right. I am tired…but promise to call me the moment you get a new phone?”

“I promise. What’s your number? Hold on, let me find a pen.” Bucky said quickly as he scooted off of his bed. The princess laughed.

“Just ask Peter. I will text him my number now.”

“Oh… okay.” The man said with a shrug before smiling at the screen. “Thanks for talking with me.”

“Thank you for calling! I’ll talk to you soon!” Shuri said with a smile before ending the call. Once the screen went black, Bucky lay back against the pillows on his bed, staring up at the ceiling for several minutes. Though his room was hardly cold, the man shifted to pull a blanket over himself. Now that he was alone for the first time in several hours, feelings of guilt and worthlessness began to creep back to the forefront of Bucky’s mind. His thoughts wandered back to the conversation he had had with Tony that morning. The man had told him that nothing was his fault. He did not need to be forgiven. Bucky was positive that Tony’s words were sincere, but they left him feeling confused. Not only did Tony seem to hold no ill will towards him, but the genius also did not blame him for the deaths of his parents.

_“If Stark really doesn’t blame me, then why do I still feel so guilty? Why do I still feel useless and pathetic?”_ Bucky angrily scratched at his scalp, the confliction inside of him fueling his frustration. He rolled around a bit, feeling suddenly uncomfortable despite the soft fabric touching every inch of his skin. After several unsuccessful attempts to get comfortable, Bucky sat up and closed his eyes, focusing on his breathing as he tried to calm down.

“Friday?” He asked after a moment, not bothering to open his eyes.

“Yes, Sergeant?”

“Can you play one of those Dinah Shore records for me?”

“Of course.” As the music began to play over the speaker, Bucky grabbed a pillow and hugged it close to his chest. The super soldier felt as if he had a devil on one shoulder telling him that he was blameless, and an angel on the other shoulder reminding him that he was very much guilty. He shook his head quickly, as if to make them disappear, before he focused on the soft voice of his favorite singer. Old habits die hard, and Bucky once again found himself relying on the memory of a summer picnic to block out the feelings he could not cope with until sleep finally took him.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I pRoMiSe yOu ThReE cHaPtErS bY sAtUrDaY." Okay, apparently I've just been lying to you guys for the past month. I'm so sorry, I swear it's just one thing after another lately. I am not done writing, but I am on call this weekend, so I apologize if I don't get the other chapters up today.
> 
> That being said, I did a bunch of research for future chapters (I'm a sucker for the fine details in a story that most people don't even think twice about, so I always research on real-life historical places/events/time zones and everything else in between) to avoid any plotholes or wild inaccuracies, and I'm very excited about where this story is going. I hope you guys are too :D
> 
> P.S. I will respond to all comments on the previous chapter, and this one, once I get another one up for you guys. :)


	16. Chapter 16

Tony bolted upright in his bed as he awoke from a nightmare, tears streaming down his face. He hugged himself tightly, struggling to breathe as he attempted to calm himself down. After several minutes had passed, Tony lay back down in his bed and pulled his blanket up around himself, closing his eyes as he released a deep sigh.

_“I thought I was done with this. Why am I still scared?”_ Tony thought to himself as he rubbed his left arm beneath the covers. It had been nearly a week since he had cleared the air with Bucky, and as a result, a great deal of tension in the tower had vanished. Though he and the former assassin had not spoken since, Tony no longer felt anxious or upset by the man’s presence, and Bucky no longer seemed to be afraid of him. Tony thought that everything was on the fast track to normal, so why did re-living the moment he found out the truth behind his parents’ deaths still frighten him so badly?

After taking a few deep breaths, Tony rolled over to look at his alarm clock, groaning when he saw that it was only one-thirty.

_“Pete won’t be awake for hours.”_ He thought with a frown. The boy had an uncanny ability to know when Tony needed a hug, and the genius definitely needed a hug at that moment; whether he would have admitted it or not. After tossing around for a few more minutes, the man finally sat up and dragged himself out of bed, a thick blanket wrapped around his shoulders like a cape. Though he would normally spend the night in his lab after a bad dream, somehow the thought of sitting on a metal stool all alone did not sit well with him—even if he would get to tinker with his tools. Instead, Tony opted to stay on his floor for once, making a pot of coffee and pouring himself a large mugful before moving to sit on the couch. Tony flipped on the TV, making sure to keep the volume low so as not to wake Peter. He surfed through the channels aimlessly before he dropped the remote onto the arm of the couch as he landed on a classic sitcom. Tony sipped his coffee while he stared blankly at the large screen in front of him, relaxing slightly as the sound of lighthearted conversation from the television characters helped to alleviate a tiny bit of the loneliness he felt.

“Tony, what’s wrong?” The man startled slightly as he turned to see Peter walking toward him, curls wild and eyes only half-open.

“Nothing’s wrong. Sorry, Bud. I thought the volume was low enough.”

“It is.” Peter said, voice thick with sleep. He sat down beside Tony, helping himself to half of the man’s blanket. “The smell of the coffee woke me up.” The teen said before clearing his throat.

“Sorry, Pete.” Tony frowned as he looked at the boy beside him. “Sometimes I forget how heightened your senses are. Go back to bed.”

“Not until you tell me what’s wrong.”

“I already said that nothing is wrong.”

“Yeah, that’s why you’re drinking coffee and watching _Frasier_ at…whatever ungodly hour it is.” Peter said as he realized that he had no idea what time it actually was.

“I’m just having some trouble sleeping.” Tony said. The teen rolled his eyes.

“Why are you having trouble sleeping?” Tony opened his mouth to respond, but Peter held up a finger, giving Tony a warning look as he cut the man off. “You better not lie to me.”

“…You’ve been spending too much time with Pepper and Rhodey.”

“I’ve hardly seen Miss Potts since summer started, and Colonel Rhodes has been on a mission for a few weeks—and you know it. Wanna know why we all sound the same? Because you always pretend you’re fine even when you’re not. Didn’t I tell you that it’s okay to cry? Well, it’s also okay to not be okay.” Tony was clearly taken aback by Peter’s words, and the teen frowned. “I dunno why you always do this. If you’re worried that I’ll tell someone—“

“Stop right there, Pete. You’re one of the few people I trust unconditionally.”

“Then why do you do this every time?” Tony clenched his jaw as he looked at Peter before laughing softly.

“Geez, Kid. What’s gotten into you?”

“I have no filter between the hours of twelve and six. I also won’t tolerate anyone treating you badly—and that includes you. So tell me what’s wrong.” Peter said, making it clear to Tony that he wouldn’t give up. The man stared at Peter for several moments, and Peter stared back, raising an eyebrow. Tony chuckled softly, having no doubt that Peter picked that expression up from his aunt. He released a long sigh before dropping his head, resting his forehead against Peter’s shoulder so that the teen could not see his face.

“I just had a bad dream.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.”

“Okay, well why are you out here?”

“I can’t go back to sleep once I have a nightmare.”

“Why not?”

“I…” Tony shrugged in response. “Not sure.”

“You afraid you’ll have another one?”

_“Bingo. Damn, just how perceptive is this kid?”_ The man thought to himself.

“Tony?”

“Yeah?”

“How often do you have nightmares?” The teen asked softly. Peter had always assumed that the man’s bizarre sleep schedule was due to insomnia or losing track of time while working; it had never occurred to him that Tony might purposefully be avoiding sleep.

“More often than not.” Peter moved his arms up to wrap around the man, hugging him gently. The hug lasted only moments before Peter released Tony and left the warmth of his blanket. He stood up and grabbed the remote, using it to turn off the television.

“Come on.”

“Where?” Tony asked, secretly disappointed that the boy’s hug had not lasted longer.

“Just follow me.” The man did as he was told, frowning when he realized that Peter was leading him back to his room.

“Pete…” The boy ignored him, opening the door and making his way over to Tony’s large bed.

“Sleepover in Mr. Stark’s room!” He said with a mischievous grin as he hopped up onto Tony’s large bed, jumping up and down as if he were on a trampoline. Tony laughed and shook his head.

“Go back to your own bed, Kid.”

“Nope.”

“Peter…”

“Fine. I’ll go back to my own bed if you can convincingly tell me that you would rather sleep alone.” Tony threw his arms up into the air in exasperation, shaking his head.

“I want to sleep alone.”

“You looked up and to the right when you said that.”

“Uh…your point?”

“That’s what people do when they’re lying.” Tony stared at Peter for several moments before he walked over and got into his bed.

“Lights off, Fri.” As the lights dimmed, Tony heard Peter snicker. “Oh, shut up.” He muttered as he lay down. Several minutes passed before Tony reached out to touch the boy’s arm. “Thank you.” He whispered softly.

“Shh. Go to sleep.” Tony smiled, turning his head to look at Peter before closing his eyes.

_“Am I parenting him, or is he parenting me?”_ Tony wondered, though he didn’t have much time to reflect on that thought as the exhausted man quickly fell back asleep.

* * *

 

_Tony’s breath caught in his throat as he watched Captain America’s iconic shield crash down against the arc reactor in his chest. His bottom lip trembled as he looked up into Steve’s familiar, blue eyes, though the look in the other man’s eyes was one Tony did not recognize._

_“Cap…”_

_“Pathetic.” The Captain sneered. Tony’s eyes widened._

_“What?”_

_“I thought Stark men were made of iron.” Tony was taken aback._

_“How did you…” Tony never finished the question, stunned into silence at the appearance of the man who had walked up behind Steve._

_“He’s right, Tony. You’re an embarrassment to the Stark name.” Howard said, looking down at his son in disgust._

_“Dad…” Howard shook his head, turning his back on Tony before glancing to the side to look at the Captain._

_“Do me a favor, and end him before he can further demean my name.” Howard said before walking away. Steve turned to Tony, a look of apathy in his eyes._

_“Cap…” Tony edged backward as the man sauntered toward him. His breath caught in his throat, pain shooting up his left arm as he felt the start of a panic attack."_ _Steve.” He pleaded. Suddenly, Tony’s chest felt heavier, and he reached up to claw at his shattered arc reactor._

“Tony?”

_The genius continued to claw at the sensation on his chest as Steve closed the distance between them. He watched as Steve stopped beside him, raising the shield over his head._

_“Steve, please…” He pleaded again as the strange pressure spread to his shoulder as well._

“Tony!”

The man jolted awake, confused as he was suddenly cast into darkness. Breathing heavily, he looked around with wild eyes. Where was he? Where had Steve gone?

“Tony, you’re okay. It was just another bad dream.” He turned toward the voice in confusion, staring blankly at the teenager beside him for several moments until his brain registered that it was Peter. All at once, Tony realized where he was, and he hung his head, hands covering his face. Peter pressed himself up against his mentor, hugging the man tightly as he lay his cheek on Tony’s shoulder. He was almost positive that Tony was crying, but Peter knew the man would feel better if he pretended not to notice, so he just continued to hold him silently. After several minutes had passed and Tony’s breathing began to even out, Peter decided to attempt a bit of humor, poking the man’s side as he released him from the long hug. “You’re safe, Tony. Spiderman won’t let anyone hurt you.” The genius did laugh softly, finally moving his hands away from his face. He glanced at the clock beside his bed, seeing that it was almost four-thirty. He sighed deeply, sadness washing over his features as he looked at Peter.

“Kid, why don’t you go back to your own bed? I’ll go down to my lab for a while.”

“No.”

 “C’mon, Pete. You already helped me get more sleep than I do most nights, I’ll be fine.”

“You can sleep longer.”

“Yeah, and I might wake you up again.”

“So what? I’m on summer vacation. I can sleep ‘til noon if I want to!” Peter frowned at Tony through the darkness.

“I’m really not even tired anymore.” Tony lied, smiling as he reached out to squeeze Peter’s shoulder lovingly. “Why don’t you let this old man stop bothering you and go get some rest? I’ll order us your favorite donuts for when you wake up, hm?”

“When will you get it through your head that you’re not bothering me?” Peter asked softly as he looked at Tony as if he could see straight through the man’s soul. “I want to be here. I will **_always_** be here for you. I’ll sleep with you every night for the rest of the summer if you want me to. And when I’m back home for school, you can call me if you have a nightmare, okay? I’ll answer no matter what time it is… and you don’t have to buy me my favorite donuts or anything else either. This isn’t some chore that I’m doing. You’ve always been there for me. I want to be there for you too.” Tony could feel tears in his eyes as Peter spoke, but, to his own surprise, he realized that he didn’t care. The billionaire had never once, in his entire life, known what it felt like to be loved unconditionally until that very moment. He was accustomed to buying love with his money, gifts, and connections, or earning it through the use of his intellect and skills. He had tried his entire life to not be a bother to anybody that he cared for, because the moment he became a bother, their relationship ended—or at the very least changed for the worse. Peter had seen him at his worst. The boy had seen him having a panic attack; seen him sobbing like a child. He was also the only other person, aside from Pepper, to ever witness his night terrors. And, to Tony’s great surprise, he was far more gentle and understanding than even she had been. Would it be childish of him to rely on a teenager? He wasn’t sure. But maybe, just maybe, it would be all right to rely on Peter once in a while. Several minutes passed without Tony speaking. Peter finally reached out to gently push Tony back against his pillow before laying down, his head resting on his own pillow.

“Just sleep, okay? I’ll wake you up if you have another nightmare.” Tony remained quiet for several more minutes before he swallowed the lump in his throat, finally breaking his silence.

“Pete?”

“What?”

“I love you.” Peter was surprised to hear Tony say those words, but he did not have to hesitate to say them back.

“I know. I love you too.” Peter glanced to the side to see Tony close his eyes, a smile on his face. He watched quietly until he was sure the man was asleep before he glared angrily up at the ceiling.

_“I don’t know what Tony dreamt about, but I know that Captain Rogers was hurting him.”_ Peter thought, recalling what Tony had said in his sleep. _“I need to watch him more closely. If he so much as looks at Tony wrong, I’ll make sure he regrets it.”_

* * *

 

Tony did not wake up until after ten o’clock that morning. He was startled when he saw the time, realizing that not only had he gotten nearly six hours of dreamless sleep, but he had slept for a total of ten hours—a feat he had not accomplished since he was a baby. Tony stretched his back out before turning to look at the sleeping teenager beside him. He was sure that he had never loved anyone more in his entire life. Not even his beloved mother or his precious Pepper was able to calm him down and get him back to sleep the way Peter had. However, no matter how nice it had been for a night, Tony knew that he could not become codependent on Peter. That was the last thing that either of them needed. No, he would definitely have to go back to pretending that everything was fine and that he wasn't having regular nightmares. That being said, it did warm Tony’s heart to know that if he had a particularly bad dream, he could count on Peter for a hug or some calming words. Leaning over, he quickly readjusted the covers around Peter before slipping quietly from his bedroom.

“Friday, would you please order a few boxes of donuts? Have them sent to the lounge…and make sure one box is just the strawberry frosted kind with rainbow sprinkles.”

“Right away.”

“Thanks, Honey.” He said as he shuffled into the elevator. Tony smiled to himself. He really wasn’t sure whether it was Peter’s love, the ten hours of sleep, or a combination of the two that had him in such a good mood, but he already felt wonderful despite the fact that he had not yet had any coffee. He walked out into the lounge where Thor, Loki, Bruce, and Natasha were watching TV, greeting them cheerily before he walked into the kitchen. Tony found Bucky, Steve, and Sam sitting at the table.

“Good morning, good morning!” He said as he headed into the kitchen and towards the coffee pot.

“Someone’s in a good mood this morning.” Sam said in amusement. “Have a sweet dream?”

“Hardly.” Tony said with a laugh as he picked up the empty carafe, moving to the sink to fill it with water.

“Don’t bother. It’s not working again.” Steve said, glancing at Tony over his shoulder.

“It’s not?” The genius frowned as he set the coffee pot down, moving to take a look at the machine.

“Yeah, I thought you were going to fix that.” Tony frowned softly as he unplugged the appliance, opening the top of it and peering inside.

“I did…there must be something else wrong with it.”

“Hm.” Steve simply grunted in response as he took a sip of his orange juice. Bucky looked at his friend for a moment before looking at Tony, watching the man blink several times before plastering a smile onto his face.

“No matter. I’ll go fix it and make a few upgrades while I’m at it. Shouldn’t take more than an hour at the most. I ordered donuts by the way. The box of only pink frosted ones is for Peter. Don’t touch it!” He said playfully in Sam’s direction before disappearing from the kitchen, coffeemaker in hand. Once Tony had left the room, Bucky frowned in thought, licking his lips before he spoke.

“Hey, Steve?”

“Yeah, Buck?” The man asked, a smile on his face.

“You mad at Stark?”

“Me? No…why?” Steve asked, giving Bucky a quizzical look.

“Hm? Oh, no. No reason.” Bucky said, waving the question away. Sam took the brief pause in conversation to change the subject, holding his phone up to show the two super soldiers a news article that he had just opened. The three men talked about the news for around twenty minutes until Peter sleepily shuffled into the kitchen.

“Well, look who finally decided to wake up.” Sam said with a laugh. Peter grinned sleepily as the super soldiers also greeted him.

“G'morning. I’m hungry. Anything good around here?” He asked as he moved to open a cabinet.

“Nah. Tony said he ordered donuts though. Should be here any minute.” Peter rolled his eyes, laughing softly before he turned around.

“He did?”

“Yep. He said the box of pink frosted ones is for you. Pretty sure he’d kill me if I tried to take one.” Sam said, putting his hands up in surrender. Peter grinned as he looked around.

“Where is Tony?” He asked, moving to sit down at the table with the others.

“Fixing the coffee pot.” Steve said. Peter blinked a few times before he looked at the man sitting across from him, his gaze turning hard.

“Who asked him to?” The men at the table looked at each other in confusion as Sam shrugged.

“No one did, Kid. He kinda just took it.”

“Hmm.” Peter hummed in acknowledgment as he continued to eye Steve.

“Something wrong, Son?” The Captain asked with a smile as he looked at Peter.

“No… and I’m not your son.” Steve raised an eyebrow as Bucky and Sam looked at the boy in surprise.

“Damn, Spidey’s hangry. Those donuts better get here soon.”

“Did someone say donuts?” Loki’s smooth voice asked as he carried several boxes into the kitchen and set them on the table.

“Morning, Loki!” Peter said, instantly brightening as he saw the god carrying donuts into the room.

“Good Morning, Little One. Did you sleep well?”

“Yes. Did you?”

“I did.” Loki replied with a soft chuckle as Peter found his box of donuts and stuffed one into his mouth.

“Loki! Why didn’t you leave a box out here?” Thor’s voice boomed from the other room. Peter laughed as the Asgardian swiped a box from the table, rolling his eyes as he returned to the other room. Peter looked at Bucky as the man seemed to have a hard time picking a donut.

“Don’t you like donuts?” Peter asked curiously.

“Sure I do. I love ‘em…just never seen so many flavors.”

“Most donuts were pretty basic in our day.” Steve added. Peter hardly acknowledged him.

“Try one of mine then! They’re the best kind.” Peter said as he set one of his donuts in front of Bucky.

“What? Why does he get one of your donuts?” Sam asked. Peter stuck his tongue out playfully.

“He’s nice to me.”

“He’s nice to me.” Sam mocked in a high pitched voice.

“Yeah. He doesn’t do that.” Peter said as he rolled his eyes.

“This is…so good.” Both Sam and Peter turned to see Bucky smiling down at the small cake in his hand.

“I know, right?” Peter said with a grin, watching as Bucky took another bite. “You can have another one if you want.”

“I am **_right here_**.” Sam said, which made both Bucky and Peter laugh. The four continued to eat together, Peter occasionally throwing Steve suspicious glances, before Tony reappeared around thirty minutes later.

“She’s working again. Working and upgraded to brew faster.” Tony said with a grin as he started to prepare a pot of coffee. “Everyone having some?”

“Yep!” Peter answered. Tony turned to smirk at him.

“I’m pretty sure that box of donuts in front of you will give you more than enough energy.”

“Fine. I see how it is.” Peter teased, and Tony laughed as he turned the machine on before moving to sit next to the boy. Tony grabbed his favorite donut, an original glazed, from the box on the table and took a bite as he began to talk with the others. When the coffee finished brewing, Tony started to get up, but Bucky beat him to it.

“It’s all right.” The man said softly, still not completely comfortable with Tony. “You fixed it. I’ll pour it.” Tony was taken aback but simply nodded. When Peter realized that Tony was surprised at someone doing something remotely thoughtful for him, he glowered beside his mentor, an entire ”Justice for Tony” campaign being planned in his head.

“Thanks, Barnes.” Tony said as Bucky handed him a cup of coffee. The man offered a small smile before fixing cups for himself and the others, returning to his seat to find two more pink frosted donuts in front of him. He looked up at Peter who simply grinned.

“Thanks, Peter.” The teen shook his head in response.

“You deserve them.” Bucky tilted his head, giving the boy a quizzical look. He wasn’t sure what he had done to deserve more pink frosted donuts with rainbow sprinkles, but he wouldn’t argue with Peter—they were by far the best donuts he had ever eaten in his life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Peter loves Tony with his entire heart and it makes Tony want to cry. It makes me want to cry too. 
> 
> Bucky's a good boy, and I love him.
> 
> 53,000 words and our main characters are just starting to interact. I told you it would be a slow burn. ;]


	17. Chapter 17

Bucky walked into the lounge, pleased to find Peter, who was making Thor and Loki watch YouTube conspiracy theory videos while giving his own running commentary on whether each theory was plausible or not.

“You cannot possibly believe that alternate universes overlapped and—“ Peter cut Loki off, clearly passionate about this particular conspiracy theory.

“The Mandela Effect is **_totally_** a possibility. I mean, I know you’re not from Earth, but literally everyone remembers ‘The Berenstain Bears’ spelled with an ‘e’ instead of an ‘a’. How else do you explain that?” Thor listened to the argument with interest, looking back to his brother as the younger god spoke once again.

“Little One, do you expect me to believe that alternate universes collided, or there was a change in the timeline and the only thing that people remember differently is the name of a children’s book?”

“Well…there are other Mandela Effects too!”

“Such as?”

“Like Jiffy peanut butter was never a thing, it’s ‘Jif’ peanut butter. And the evil queen in Snow White didn’t say ‘Mirror, Mirror on the Wall’, she said ‘Magic Mirror on the Wall’, and Pikachu’s tail isn’t black, and—“

“Correct me if I am mistaken, but are not all of the things you mentioned associated with a Midgardian childhood?”

“Yeah, so?”

“Did it ever occur to you that one may never remember every detail exactly as it was? A young mind is an impressionable thing. If even one child were to make a slight mistake, he may spread that memory to many others.” Peter huffed as Loki finished speaking.

“You’re no fun.” The teen said as he sulked next to the god.

“Yeah, Loki. Be more fun.” Thor chided. As Loki rolled his eyes, Bucky made his presence known.

‘Sorry to interrupt, but Peter, could I ask for your help?”

“Sure!” The teen said, his face brightening instantly. “What’s up?”

“I wanted to go get a phone tomorrow. I was wondering where I go to get one like yours.”

“Well, you can go to a store or look online and compare brands and models to find what you want. Then you pick the plan that works best for you.”

“The plan?”

“Oh, yeah…I guess phones are really different from the forties… Well, I think you should get the most basic plan—at least for now. And I recommend the Starkphone.” The boy said with a grin.

  
“Stark makes phones too?” Bucky asked in surprise.

“He makes just about everything.”

“So…a Starkphone… Basic plan… is that what you have?”

“The Starkphone is a yes…as for my plan…I dunno actually. Probably the most extra plan available.” The boy said with a roll of his eyes. “A few months ago, Tony was at my house and he stole my phone and my aunt’s phone. He gave us these Starkphones because he claimed he didn’t trust any phone that wasn’t his. He said he added us to his family plan.” Bucky smiled a bit as Peter spoke. The longer he stayed in the tower, the less he became afraid of Tony. From what he had heard, Bucky had always thought the man to be judgmental and condescending, but instead Bucky noticed that he was actually incredibly gentle and caring towards those around him. After all, Tony had even forgiven him for the most horrific crime imaginable, and whether he had been brainwashed or not, he knew that he did not deserve the younger man’s forgiveness.

“All right, so a basic plan and a smart phone it is.” Bucky said with a smile. “Thanks, Peter.”

“Wait! Do you want me to come help you get one tomorrow?” The boy asked, but Bucky shook his head.

“It’s fine. Steve and I were going to spend the day together, so I’ll ask him to go with me.”

“Okay.” Peter said, stiffening slightly at the mention of the Captain. Bucky wondered if he had imagined the teen’s odd behavior, but he shrugged it off as he went to go find his friend.

“Brother, should we consider getting phones as well?” Thor asked curiously.

“Of course not. We’re gods.”

“But, you guys can talk to me **_any time_** if you have phones!” Peter said with a grin. Thor looked at Loki who threw up his arms in exasperation.

“Well, all right. If Peter is insistent upon it, then I suppose we’ll have to begin using them sooner or later.“

* * *

 

“Steve!” Bucky said as he exited the elevator on their floor, calling out to his friend who sat on the couch as he sketched a picture.

“Hey, Buck.” Steve said, looking up from his drawing with a smile.

“I want to get a phone. We need to go to the bank tomorrow so I can get my money.” Steve’s smile instantly faded.

“Buck…”

“What?” He asked, immediately noticing his friend’s change in tone.

“The bank is closed.”

“What do you mean?”

“It’s gone.”

“Banks don’t just disappear, Steve.”

“Bucky, we used the same bank, didn’t we? The Brooklyn Trust Company doesn’t exist anymore. It hasn’t for decades. Near as I can figure out, it merged with different banks a few times over the years. It’s called Chase now.”

“Well, that’s fine then. They should still have my money, right?” Steve shook his head.

“I went through the same thing. A bank account that was dormant for decades probably didn’t even make it to their computerized system. Plus you’d still need your bankbook to prove it was yours.” Bucky’s shoulders slumped.

“I had nearly eighty dollars in there.” The man paused for several moments before looking up at his friend. “That’s not much today anyway, is it?” Steve shook his head sadly.

“It doesn’t matter. I can get you a phone—“

“No. I don’t want Stark paying for it.”

“Bucky…”

“No. Absolutely not. I know he pays for that little card that has money on it. I don’t want him buying my phone. I’m already in his tower. I’ll…I’ll just go get a job. Sure.” He said, brightening a bit at the thought. Maybe some hard work could distract him from thinking too much anyway.

“Things are very different from the way they were a long time ago.” Bucky shook his head, a frown on his face. Where was that scrappy little go-getter that he had befriended as a child?

“I’ll go out first thing in the morning to find a job, and then we can spend the afternoon together, okay?” Steve shook his head, shrugging his shoulders slightly.

“All right, Buck. If that’s what you want.”

Bucky went out early the next morning, excited at the prospect of getting a job. However, by early afternoon, the super soldier found himself getting discouraged. Most of the people he encountered told him to check their website for job openings. A few people just gave him odd looks and told him they were not hiring. After hours of searching, Bucky finally found a construction company willing to hire him on the spot—the only problem being that he could not fill out the required new hire paperwork. Bucky did not have a phone number, an email address, a bank account, or references. The super soldier knew that he had been issued a social security number back in 1935, but he never had memorized it, and he had no clue what had happened to the card with his number on it. Realizing that he had no choice but to give up, the man slowly made his way back to the Avengers tower.

Kicking a small rock in his path, Bucky sighed as he looked at the sun, which had already begun to set. Steve had been right. Things were different. People constantly asked him for things he knew nothing about (what on earth was an email?), and everyone seemed too busy to explain it to him. He looked about at the skyscrapers, neon lights, and giant LCD screens. This was his home, but it was so different—and not in a good way.

_“I don’t understand. I’m a hard worker. Why do they need all this information? I just wanna do my bit and get a paycheck at the end of the week. How am I expected to get all this stuff I seem to need for a job when I don’t have money to get it in the first place? Why is everything so different? None of this seems more convenient at all—only more difficult. I just want to be home. I know I am home, but it’s too different. It doesn’t feel like home.”_

Before he realized it, Bucky had reached the tower. As he entered the building, the man saw a clock in the lobby, surprised to see that it read just after six. Rubbing his face as he stepped into the elevator, Bucky sighed, hoping that Steve wouldn’t be upset that he had spent the entire day looking for a job.

“Lounge please, Miss Friday.”

“Yes, Sergeant. Welcome back.”

“Thanks, Doll.” He said softly as he leaned against the wall. Though Bucky had skipped lunch, he was not the least bit hungry. Despite that, he knew that he needed to eat something if he didn’t want Steve to nag at him later. Besides, he needed to spend some time with his friend—no matter how much he would rather lie in his bed alone.

As the doors opened and he stepped out onto the floor of the lounge, Bucky walked in to find only Steve, Natasha, Tony, and Peter sitting on the couches, watching a movie as they ate pizza.

“Hey, I was beginning to worry.” Steve said with a smile as Bucky moved into the room and sat beside him.

“Hi, Bucky.” Peter greeted with a mouthful of pizza.

“Don’t be gross.” Tony said with a playful nudge to the teen who was curled up against his side.

“Sorry, **_Dad_**.” Peter said with a cheeky grin. Tony smacked the boy gently on the back of the head, a smile twitching on the corner of his lips. Bucky watched the exchange in amusement, momentarily forgetting how upset he was.

“Hi, Peter.” The super soldier said with a small smile. He then turned to Steve as Peter directed his attention back to the movie in front of him.

“I couldn’t get a job.” He whispered with a frown. “You need a phone and a bank account, and heck Steve, I don’t even remember my social security number.” The Captain frowned as he reached out to squeeze his friend’s arm comfortingly.

“We’ll figure it out, okay?”

“I guess.”

“Why don’t you eat something? You’ll feel better.” Bucky was pretty sure that eating would **_not_** make him feel better, but he grabbed a piece of pizza anyway, knowing that Steve would pester him if he didn’t. The man only managed to get down a slice and a half of pizza before feeling sick. He stared blankly at the movie, in such low spirits that even the splendor of watching a film on the large, high-definition screen did nothing to fascinate him. After a few more minutes, he finally leaned over to gently touch his friend’s arm.

“Hey, I think I’m going to go to bed.” Bucky whispered, causing Steve to give him a worried look.

“It’s not even eight yet. Are you feeling okay?”

“Yeah, sure. I’m just tired. I walked all over today.” Steve opened his mouth to protest but shut it quickly upon seeing the look on his friend’s face.

“All right. We’ll see what we can do tomorrow, okay?” Bucky only half-nodded in response before he got up, quickly leaving the room. He did not leave without drawing the attention of the others, and a few moments after Bucky left, Natasha grabbed the remote and paused the movie.

“What’s wrong with him?” She asked, nodding her head in the direction of the elevator.

“He had a bad day.” Steve said as he rubbed his neck. “Bucky wanted to get a job. I warned him things were different. He doesn’t have any of the information they ask for these days.”

“Why does he need a job?” Peter asked curiously, and Steve gave a humorless chuckle.

“He wants to buy a phone.”

“I don’t know why you don’t just buy him one.” Tony started, slightly confused that Steve hadn’t already purchased a phone for his friend. “But if he wants money that badly, why doesn’t he just apply for his back pay from the government?”

“What do you mean?” Steve asked curiously.

“Well, he was a POW for seven decades. That entitles him to seventy years of back pay. Calculating all that with the pay raises he would have been entitled to, and that would put him somewhere between…” Tony hummed for a second as he calculated the total in his head, “oh, around three to four million dollars, I’d say.” Steve’s eyes widened.

“Holy crap.” Peter whispered.

“Now, this is the government we’re talking about. It’s not like they’ll just write him a check on the spot, but I bet he could get it before the year is out.”

“Tony, you’re a genius!” Steve exclaimed. Tony preened at the praise. Peter eyed Steve suspiciously. “I’m going to tell Bucky the good news now!” Steve said, hopping up from his seat on the couch as he made a beeline for the elevator. The excited Captain was at his floor in moments, knocking softly on Bucky’s door.

“Bucky! Open the door.” Steve was greeted with silence. “C’mon, Buck. I’ve got good news. Can you hear me?”

“The Sergeant is asleep, Captain.” Friday’s voice interrupted. The man sighed, not sure whether to believe the AI or not, though he had learned it would do no good to continue trying to bother his friend if he did not want to be disturbed. Dejected, Steve retired to his own room for the evening, hoping that his friend would be in better spirits upon hearing about the back pay he had waiting for him.

* * *

 

Due to nightmares, Bucky woke up several times during the night, staying in his room as he did not have the energy to move elsewhere. After his third bad dream of the night, Bucky refused to go back to sleep, asking Friday to turn on the lights along with some soft music. The man lay in bed for several hours, buried deep beneath the plethora of blankets that covered his bed. It was around ten o’clock that morning when he could no longer ignore his growling stomach, and he finally forced himself out of bed. Wrapping a soft blanket around his shoulders, Bucky stepped out of his room.

“G’morning, Buck!” Steve greeted from the living room on his floor. Bucky sighed; Steve had clearly been waiting for him.

“Morning.”

“I’ve got great news for you! I wanted to tell you last night, but you went to bed so early… Anyway, you don’t need to worry about money anymore. The government owes you seventy years of back pay from your time as a POW.” Bucky’s eyes widened in surprise.

“Seventy years? How much would that be?” Bucky thought aloud.

“Over three million dollars.” When Bucky’s jaw dropped, Steve laughed. “That was my reaction too.”

“Your reaction?” Bucky asked in confusion.

“Yeah, when Tony pointed out that the government owes you all that money.” Bucky blinked in surprise. Tony had pointed it out to Steve? Why was Stark helping him? “We’ll figure out your social security number and then apply for your back pay as soon as possible, all right? Once you get that, you can get your phone and hopefully everything else you need too.” Steve said as he squeezed Bucky’s shoulder. The former assassin suddenly felt far more optimistic about the foreseeable future.

“That’s…that’s great, Steve.” Bucky smiled a genuine smile, one of the few Steve had seen since his friend’s return to New York. Pleased, the Captain stood up and headed over toward the elevator.

“Breakfast?”

“Yeah.” Bucky said, following his friend into the elevator. The two of them headed upstairs, finding Tony, Bruce, Thor, Loki, Sam, and Peter lounging on the comfortable furniture eating pop tarts, cereal, and other various breakfast foods. Peter, who had been sitting near Loki, moved next to Tony the moment that he saw Steve, eyeing the Captain carefully. Though no one else seemed to notice, Loki raised a brow.

“You look less crabby today.” Sam said to Bucky, who rolled his eyes.

“I’m never crabby.”

“You are right now.” Sam challenged.

“Nuh uh, he just has resting bitch face.” Peter protested. Bucky’s eyes widened at Peter’s use of the profanity, and Steve frowned in the teen’s direction. Tony tried not to laugh.

“Language.” Steve reprimanded. To everyone’s surprise, Peter rolled his eyes.

“It just means that Bucky looks angry even though he isn’t!”

“You do have that problem.” Sam pointed out.

“Oh yeah, should I smile more?” Bucky asked, putting on an obnoxiously fake smile that was somehow still charming.

“I take it back. That’s worse. Put those pearly whites away.” Sam said in mock disgust as he turned away, causing Peter to laugh loudly. Bucky turned towards Peter and smiled softly in his direction, pleased with himself at having made the young man laugh. Steve just shook his head tiredly before disappearing into the kitchen. Bucky followed him, and the two super soldiers both grabbed coffee and something to eat before joining the others on the couches. Everyone lazed about for quite a while as they talked and ate their breakfast. Though Bucky was in a good mood, he remained mostly silent. This earned him concerned glances from Steve throughout the entirety of their meal, which he chose to ignore. A while later, Bucky noticed Tony get up and make his way to the kitchen to get more coffee. After a moment of contemplation, Bucky also grabbed his mug and headed into the kitchen as well.

“Hey, Stark…” Bucky said softly as he entered the room. Tony turned around in surprise.

“Hey…what’s up?” Tony said, maintaining his cool temperament easily.

“I just wanted to thank you for telling Steve about my back pay…I’m not sure it would’ve occurred to either of us.”

“I like finding solutions to problems.” Tony said with a nonchalant shrug. “I am curious though. Why do you need money so badly?”

“Well, I want to get a phone…“

“Yeah, Steve said that. But why don’t you just ask him to buy you one?” Bucky blinked a few times, surprised by the question.

“I…didn’t know if he had enough money.”

“He’s got a card.” Tony said as he started to exit the kitchen.

“That card has your name on it.” Bucky said quickly. Tony turned around and looked at the super soldier as if there could not have been a more obvious statement.

“Uh, yeah…I pay for everything around here.”

“Why?”

“I have the most money. It just makes sense.” Bucky furrowed his brow. It didn’t make sense to him. Even if he did have the most money, Tony shouldn’t have to pay for everything. “Listen, Barnes.” Tony said upon seeing the confusion on the other man’s face. “Your back pay is going to take months to come through. Just have Steve buy you whatever you need until then. If you’re that worried about it, Friday can tell you how to pay me back later.” He said with a dismissive wave of his hand before taking a sip of coffee as he shuffled back out to the other room. Bucky stared after the man for a few moments before finally moving to the coffeepot to refill his mug.

_“I can’t figure it out. The things I’ve heard about him…they don’t add up at all. He let me live here, he forgave me, and he’s even helping me? I thought it was to get revenge at first, but…I don’t deserve any of this.”_ Bucky leaned against the counter, taking a long drink of his coffee before staring down at the dark liquid in thought. _“And Peter loves him too… why does Steve tend to knock the guy? I think he’s one of the nicest people I’ve ever met.”_ With that thought, Bucky returned to the other room, sitting next to Steve as he began to silently observe the billionaire across the room. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Honestly, I feel like this was one of the most boring chapters I have written. That being said, it's very necessary to the plot. I still hope you enjoyed it. :)


	18. Chapter 18

Tony bolted upright in bed, clutching at his arc reactor as he breathed heavily. It took him a few minutes to fully become aware of his surroundings, and upon realizing that he was safe in bed, Tony slumped back against his pillows. Resting an arm over his eyes, the man focused on his breathing, working to calm himself down. After a few moments, he peeked at the clock from beneath his arm.

_2:47 AM_

Tony flipped onto his stomach, burying his face into his pillow with a groan. Part of him wanted to take Peter up on his offer to comfort him. It would be so easy to crawl into bed with the kid and fall back asleep. After a brief moment, Tony shook his head quickly as he dismissed the idea. No matter how much he tried to rationalize it, Tony knew that he could not let himself become dependent on Peter. He was the adult in the situation, and though he had seen that the boy could actually handle his night terrors, he wasn’t about to submit him to that. Tony wanted just one somewhat healthy relationship in his life, and he was determined that he would not mess up the father-son dynamic he had built with Peter. Sighing deeply, Tony slowly rolled out of his bed, quietly sneaking out of his room so as not to wake Peter. After walking out to the living room, Tony frowned in thought. For some reason, the thought of spending the night in his lab—his typical oasis—was still not a comforting one. Nevertheless, Tony knew that he could not stay on his floor without running the risk of waking Peter; he had already had a difficult enough time convincing the boy to sleep in his own room. Tony knew that should Peter wake up, he would definitely be too tired to turn down the boy's offer of comfort. After a brief moment of thought, Tony settled on spending the rest of his night in the lounge, heading straight into the elevator before asking Friday to take him there.

He yawned as the doors opened, a sleepy frown on his face as he saw a small stream of light coming from the kitchen. Not hearing a sound, Tony assumed that one of the others forgot to turn the light off after raiding the pantry for a midnight snack. Rubbing his eyes, he shuffled straight into the kitchen, tiredly grabbing a mug and pouring himself a hot cup of coffee. After taking a sip of the warm liquid, he blinked several times and looked down at the mug. Why was there fresh coffee in the kitchen? Tony whirled around to find Bucky casually staring at him as he took a swig of coffee from his own mug.

“Hey.”

“Geez, Barnes. Why didn’t you say anything?” Tony asked in surprise.

“I didn’t want to scare you again.”

“That’s fair.” Tony said after a brief pause. He stood there for a minute, glancing out at the couches in the other room, before looking back to the empty chairs at the table. As much as he’d rather sit with just about anyone else, he really didn’t want to be alone. “Mind if I join you?”

“Go ahead.” Bucky said, clearly surprised that Tony wanted to sit with him. The two men did not converse for several minutes until Tony finally spoke up, uncomfortable with the silence.

“Nightmare?”

“…Yeah.” The look of surprise reappeared on Bucky’s face. “How’d you know?”

“Lucky guess.” Tony took another sip of coffee, and Bucky looked him over.

“Did you have a nightmare too?”

“Yep.” Tony admitted with a shrug. Bucky just nodded silently. They continued to sit there for several more minutes, both finding solace in the other’s presence until a loud noise echoed throughout the lounge. Bucky froze in alarm, but Tony stood up calmly as he looked directly into one of Friday’s cameras. “What’s the problem?”

“I have just received an alert that there is a disturbance downstate. Director Fury is requesting the presence of the Avengers immediately.” Tony rolled his eyes.

“Who on earth is creating trouble at three in the morning?” The man asked in irritation. “Did you wake the others up?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Peter?”

“I enabled soundproofing around his room. He is still fast asleep.”

“Good girl.”

“The others are all making their way to the helipad.” As soon as Friday confirmed the other Avengers were already in gear, Tony headed for the elevator. Bucky followed him.

“Hold up there a minute, Fabio. Where do you think you’re going?” Bucky blinked in confusion, the reference lost on him.

“I want to help.”

“You haven’t been cleared for missions yet. You can come to the helipad, but that’s as far as you’re going today.” Bucky’s shoulders slumped in disappointment, though he nodded in understanding. “All right.” Tony said, standing back to let the super soldier enter the elevator with him. The two men rode in silence up to the helipad, and when they stepped out to meet the rest of the Avengers, Steve grinned.

“Bucky! You coming to help us out?”

“No, he’s not. He’s just sending us off.” Tony said before the super soldier could open his mouth. Natasha and Bruce both exchanged a look; the two of them being the only Avengers on the platform observant enough to wonder why Tony and Bucky were arriving together.

“What do you mean?” Steve asked, voice filled with irritation as he looked at Tony.

“He hasn’t been cleared for missions. We don’t know if—“

“Tony, he’s coming.”

“It’s not safe, Steve.”

“Don’t give me that. He’s one of the best men I’ve ever fought with, and I’ll be damned if I let you try and tell me that he’s not cleared for a mission.”

“I’m not doubting that, but you haven’t fought with him in over seventy years!” Tony reasoned, frustration in his eyes.

“Steve, he's right—“ Bucky began, but the man shook his head.

“You’re coming.” The Captain said to Bucky, though his eyes were on Tony, daring the younger man to defy him. Tony clenched his jaw before double tapping the arc reactor on his chest, silently walking past the others and into the open aircraft as his suit concealed him completely.

* * *

 

Bucky’s fist made contact with the jaw of the masked assailant in front of him before he flipped another man over his shoulders that had attempted to choke him. The super soldier elbowed a third man in the face as he watched Natasha jump onto the shoulders of the first man, using her legs to bring him to the ground in a headlock. After taking care of the three men guarding the back entrance to the building they were attempting to infiltrate, Natasha tapped her earpiece.

“We’re clear.”

“All right.” Bucky heard Steve’s voice over his own earpiece, still marveling at how efficient the small technology was. “Stand down and wait for my signal. Sam, Bruce, west exit covered?”

“Roger, Rogers.” Bucky rolled his eyes as he heard Sam’s reply.

“Wanda, Vision, how’s the south exit looking?”

“All clear, Captain.” Vision replied

“All right, Tony and I are going in. Thor’s backing us up. Stand down and wait for our signal.” The communication was silent for several minutes. Bucky looked around nervously. Everything was quiet. Almost too quiet. Suddenly, a thunderous crash was heard and the sky began to rain glass.

“Didn’t see that coming.” Bucky heard Tony say. The super soldier looked up to see an aircraft, unlike any aircraft he had seen in the past, crashing through the building’s glass ceiling as it made its ascent into the sky.

“We can’t let this one get away. Tony, you and Thor get up there and work on bringing that ship down. I’m backing you up. Everyone on the ground get ready, there are enemy operatives headed your way.” The Captain said over the speaker, throwing his shield up to knock out an assailant trying to stop Tony from tampering with one of the aircraft’s engines.

“Tony, don’t touch the aircraft.” Thor said, and Tony stood down as the god summoned a large blast of lighting, bringing it down onto the ship as thunder roared in the distant sky. Bucky looked up in awe, completely distracted by the electricity surging over the aircraft.

“When did your powers get that strong? You don’t even have your magic hammer.” Tony said in surprise.

“Mjölnir simply helped me channel my powers until I learned to control them. After all, I’m not the god of hammers, am I?” Thor asked jovially, clearly enjoying their battle.

“You got me there, Point Break.” Tony said as he powered up his blasters, aiming them at what Friday calculated to be the weakest point of the vessel. “Stand back, everyone. One more hit and she’s going down.” Tony fired, and sure enough, the ship plummeted quickly towards the ground.

“Barnes! Behind you!” Bucky whirled around at Natasha’s cry, just as a man leaped toward him. The super soldier kicked the gun from the man’s hand before landing a punch squarely to his jaw. The large man, hardly fazed, threw two clean cuts which Bucky dodged with ease. Bucky lunged forward and straight into a jumping side kick, knocking the air clean out of his assailant’s lungs as the man fell back to the ground. Bucky started to run towards Natasha, who was fighting off two men by herself, when he heard the sound of a bullet ricochet off his Vibranium arm. He ducked and spun around, seeing a young woman rush at him. She shot again, but he dove out of the way, the bullet missing his leg by mere centimeters. The former assassin stood up and charged at his new adversary, pulling the gun forcefully from the woman’s grip with his metal arm. Though clearly surprised by his strength, the woman did not give up easily, faking Bucky out with a right hook as she slid her lower half beneath him and brought her knee up into his groin. He grunted, bringing his elbow down onto her shoulder. In one swift movement, Bucky had her pinned to the ground, his Vibranium hand over her neck. As the woman struggled beneath him, he looked down to see an all-too-familiar image. As the woman gasped for breath, the Winter Soldier’s memories flooded his mind, and Bucky removed his hand in horror. He slid off of the young woman, looking at her with tears in his eyes as she quickly rolled away from him.

“Barnes!” Natasha yelled as she kicked a man in the side before squatting low to dodge his attempt to hit her. “Get up, Barnes. She’s going after her gun!” Steve looked over in surprise upon hearing Natasha’s words, not thinking twice before he charged towards his shell-shocked friend. The Captain arrived just in time to throw his shield at the woman, simultaneously knocking the gun from her hand as it knocked her unconscious. Natasha, who had just finished clearing the scene, charged toward the two super soldiers.

“Cap? A little help?” Tony’s voice held a hint of panic as it echoed through his teammates’ earpieces.

“Tony!” Steve’s eyes widened as he realized he had deserted the man he was supposed to be backing up. Leaving Bucky with Natasha, the Captain turned and bolted back to his post, just in time to see Tony fly up and away from an onslaught of enemies. Tony flew towards a smaller aircraft that had just exited the one he and Thor had taken down. As the genius raised his hand to shoot at the small ship, Steve noticed the large gun on the grounded vessel move into position to fire at Tony.

“Tony! Look out!” Steve shouted, running as fast as he could. Everything seemed to move in slow motion as the Captain watched a laser leave the barrel of the large ship’s gun. He threw his shield, watching with dread as he realized it was mere seconds too late to block the laser headed straight for Tony. Upon hearing the Captain’s warning, Tony turned his head as he shot his repulsor toward the quickly fleeing aircraft. The distraction caused him to narrowly miss his mark, and his eyes widened as he saw the laser blast mere feet away from him. Thor, who had been summoning lighting to strike the now-fleeing aircraft, also looked down upon hearing Steve’s warning. He charged straight for Tony, but even the god was not fast enough, and his teammates watched in horror as the long yellow laser struck the Iron Man suit. Tony fell from the sky, and Thor swooped down, catching the man before he crashed into the ground. Chaos ensued all around the heroes as the enemy operatives attempted to charge past them, wanting to make their escape just as their superiors had done in the small aircraft which was no longer visible. Thor moved swiftly toward Bucky and Natasha, lying Tony gently on the ground. Not having time to even check whether Tony was still alive, Thor clenched his jaw before he leaped back into the midst of the turmoil.

“Guard him with your life.” Natasha said to Bucky before taking off to help the others salvage what they could of their failed mission.

_“He’s hurt. Tony’s hurt because of me.”_ Bucky reached out to tap the blue light on the man’s chest, before he pulled his hand back, deciding that the man was most likely safer with the armor covering him. _“I should have listened to him. I shouldn’t have come. He knew it was dangerous to bring me, and now he's the one that's hurt. I never deserved his forgiveness in the past, and I definitely do not deserve it now. I hope he’s all right. Oh god, oh…Peter. If Tony’s not okay, I basically took a parent away from another kid. What am I going to do?”_ Bucky looked around worriedly as he began to hyperventilate, making sure that no one was sneaking up on the two of them. He looked toward the messy battle in front of him for a brief moment, watching as Hulk soared through the air, slamming enemies to the ground while Wanda used her powers to throw them into one another, effectively knocking them unconscious.

“On my count, everyone off the ground.” Thor commanded as the sky above them darkened. Bucky suddenly heard a strangled cough beside him, and he tore his eyes from the scene to look at the Iron Man suit lying beside him. He watched as the fingers on Tony’s right hand moved slightly as the man attempted to move his arm. With another gasp, he turned his head to the side.

“Barnes…blue light.” Tony choked out. Bucky complied immediately and tapped the arc reactor on the man’s chest, watching in awe as the nano-technology seemingly faded away from the man’s body. The moment Tony was free from his suit, the man sputtered before greedily gulping in oxygen. Bucky noticed that small lacerations covered Tony’s face, and he quickly looked over the man, not wanting to touch him in case of internal damage.

“Are you all right?”

“I dunno.” Tony slurred, his doe eyes betraying the fear he felt in that moment. “Can’t move much.”

“I’m so sorry. This is all my fault…I—“

“No.” Bucky blinked in surprise.

“Not **_your_** fault.” And though Tony’s words were sincere, there was a strange hint of sadness in them as the genius closed his eyes to conceal anything else he may be feeling. Bucky sat with Tony for nearly an hour, fighting off anyone who approached as Tony slipped in and out of consciousness from time to time.

“Peter?”

“Peter’s not here.” Bucky said softly, his heart sinking as confusion crossed over Tony’s face.

“Ned’s house?”

“…Yeah.” Tony lost consciousness again shortly after Bucky’s reply, and the man swallowed hard as he looked back up toward the battlefield. The fight seemed to be over. In a matter of minutes, the entire area was crawling with SHIELD agents. Seemingly out of nowhere, a tattered-looking Bruce Banner rushed toward them, falling onto his knees beside Tony as he began to inspect the man for signs of damage. The other Avengers were not far behind.

“He seems safe to move, but be gentle. I’m not sure exactly what happened to him yet.” Bruce said as Thor knelt down to pick Tony up. The Asgardian carried Tony back toward their own aircraft, the others following behind. Steve and Bucky brought up the rear of the group, and the Captain gently touched his friend’s arm.

“Buck, you okay?” Bucky scowled. He most certainly was **_not_** okay. Why hadn’t he listened to Tony? For that matter, why hadn’t Tony listened to Tony? Why had the two of them listened to Steve when they both knew it was safer for Bucky to remain at the tower?

“I’m not the one who needs your worrying.” He said softly as he stepped onto the aircraft. Steve sighed deeply, answering his phone as it began to ring.

“Yeah, Fury. I’ll send you an update on Tony as soon as possible.”

* * *

 

Peter charged up toward the helipad the moment he had spotted the aircraft from the window of the lounge. Loki had followed Peter, and the two stood near the elevator as they watched the vessel land. It was late morning, and while Peter was slightly annoyed at not being taken along, he was very excited for Tony to recount the entire mission. However, when Thor appeared in the doorway carrying an unconscious Tony in his arms, all of Peter's thoughts disappeared as he charged toward the god, eyes welling up with tears.

“What happened?”

“He was hit, Peter.” Thor said softly. Bruce followed Thor out of the spacecraft, and Peter grabbed his arm.

“Dr. Banner, he’s okay, right?” Peter asked as he walked alongside Thor.

“I looked him over on the way back. It doesn’t seem too serious… but we’re not exactly sure what hit him. It looked like an ordinary laser, but nobody can say for sure. SHIELD is inspecting the weapon that hit him now to confirm. Take him down to Med Bay, Thor.” Bruce looked back at Peter, his face softening slightly. “I’ll have Friday let you know as soon as you can come see him, okay?” Tears streamed down Peter’s cheeks and Loki hugged the teen from behind, using one arm to hold him close as he used his other hand to wipe gently at Peter’s tears.

“Tony’s so careful! Why is he the only one that got hurt?” Peter asked Natasha as he watched the rest of the Avengers file off the plane with no injuries aside from a few bruises and superficial scrapes. The woman glanced at Steve then looked back at Peter. Before she could open her mouth, Bucky moved over to Peter and Loki, worry written all over his face.

“Peter…I’m so sorry, Peter. It’s my fault. I knew that I shouldn’t have gone on the mission… Tony told me I couldn’t go, and I didn’t listen. I went anyway and—“ Peter didn’t hear the rest of the man’s explanation, the wheels turning in his head. Tony had told Bucky he couldn’t go on the mission, but he went anyway? There was only one person who could defy Tony, and Peter knew that Bucky wasn’t that person.

“ _ **You**_.” Peter said as he glared at Steve with hard eyes, not even realizing that he had interrupted Bucky’s apology. “This is your fault! Let me guess. Tony told Bucky ‘no’ and he was fine with it, but you weren’t!”

“Son, I…”

“What did I tell you about that? I’m **_not_** your son!”

“Peter. I’m sorry… it was my fault. I was supposed to be backing Tony up, and I went to help Bucky instead. I didn’t make it back in time. I’m so sorry.” The anger he felt toward Steve continued to rise as the man spoke, but what really took the cake for Peter was that Bucky looked far more apologetic than Steve did. Peter saw red. He broke free from Loki’s hold, walking straight up to Steve as he poked the man in the chest.

“ _ **Are**_ you sorry? Are you **_really_** sorry? Because Bucky looks more sorry than you do, and it’s not even his fault! He said himself that he knew he shouldn’t have gone. You made him go, didn’t you? You were supposed to have Tony’s back today, and you didn’t! But I guess that’s not anything new, huh? Tony once told me that you’re the leader of the Avengers, but he was wrong. A leader wouldn’t do what you did in Siberia. A leader wouldn’t split his team in half and take them underground for two years because he didn’t get his way! And a leader ** _certainly_** wouldn’t do what you did today! I can’t believe that the entire country would have loved you so much if you were always this way. Did your brain get freezer burn after seventy years on ice? Because you definitely don’t act like the Captain America I looked up to when I was a kid. You better watch yourself, ** _Cap_**. You mistreat Tony again, and I will personally drag you back to the Atlantic and put you right back where your icy heart belongs.” After his tirade, Peter abruptly turning around and walked off of the helipad, leaving the Avengers behind him in stunned silence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was an emotional roller coaster from start to finish.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If I post this chapter at 3:58 on Friday morning but haven't yet gone to sleep, it still counts as posting the chapter on Thursday night, right?

As Tony slowly regained consciousness, he groaned at the brightness of the white lights above him. Squeezing his eyes shut, he turned his head away from the light, curling into the warmth at his side.

“Sorry, Tony. Guess the lights are a bit much, huh?” The voice asked with a soft laugh.

“Bruce?” Tony asked, attempting to open his eyes once again. At Banner’s request, Friday dimmed the lights, and Tony sighed in relief as he focused on the man standing beside his bed.

“Yeah, Tony. How are you feeling?”

“Like a giant laser knocked me out of the sky.”

“So you do remember.” Bruce said with a pleased smile.

“Vaguely.” Tony tried to shift onto his side to face the other man but found that he couldn’t move his left arm. He looked down in alarm, laughing softly a moment later when he realized that Peter was curled into his side, hugging his arm tightly.

“He refused to leave your side. I had to have Nat bring him something to eat earlier.” Tony’s heart melted at Bruce’s words, and he reached out to brush the hair off the boy’s forehead.

“I was such a little asshole at his age… how is he so sweet?” Tony wondered aloud, and Bruce laughed softly.

“He’s sweet as sugar, but I wouldn’t want to be on his bad side.”

“What do you mean?”

“When I first took you to Med Bay, he was **_furious_**. I wasn’t there to witness it, but I heard from Nat. He really let Cap have it.” Tony’s eyes widened in surprise as he looked back at the sleeping teen beside him.

“Pete yelled at Steve?” Tony asked in disbelief.

“Sure did… anyway, you’ve got a concussion, multiple contusions, and a fractured wrist, but I think you’ll pull through.”

“Don’t skirt the most important topic at hand. Give it to me straight, Brucie. How’s the face look?” Bruce rolled his eyes.

“Yeah, you’ll be just fine.” He said with a chuckle. “Anyway, I’m going to head up to bed so—“

“Bed? What time is it?”

“Nearly midnight. You were out all day.” Tony’s eyes widened once again, but Bruce smiled reassuringly.

“Don’t worry, Tony. It’s normal. You were hit pretty hard. You know, you should thank me for making it nice and quiet so you could rest. It wasn’t easy. The others have been in and out all day. Peter ended up calling Pepper, May, and Happy in hysterics when I wouldn’t let him down here for the **_fifteen minutes_** I was examining you.” Tony snorted as he glanced down at the boy beside him. “Happy was here for hours until I assured him for the hundredth time that you would be fine and he could speak with you tomorrow. Pepper called me in tears; she isn’t coming back to New York until the morning, and I spent nearly thirty minutes convincing her that she didn’t have to come back early—May wasn’t much better. Well, over the phone that is. She left work early to come over here, and when she saw you, she pulled Peter aside and told him to calm down. Apparently, he had led her to believe that you were on death’s doorstep when he called her. And **_don’t_** even get me started with Loki. Thor pretty much had to drag him out of here an hour ago.” Tony smiled as he listened to Bruce speak, filled with warmth at the thought of the people he loved so much also loving him in return.

“Think Thor’s still up? Someone’s got to take Pete to bed.” Bruce shook his head as he grabbed a blanket, covering both Tony and Peter with it.

“Let him stay with you tonight, Tony. He had a rough day.” Bruce’s voice softened as he looked at Peter. “We joke about him being young, but we all see him as one of us. I think sometimes we forget how young he really is. When I let him in here after I finished examining you, he took one look at you and had a meltdown. He cried for hours, Tony. Loki held him until May came. She was able to calm him down, but he still didn’t seem like himself—wouldn’t even eat when Nat brought him dinner. He refused to touch his food until I told him I’d let him lay up there with you like he’d been trying to do all day.” The man said, sighing in concern as he turned his eyes back to Tony. “He was really frightened, and I think that you’re the person he normally goes to when he’s feeling that way.” Tony’s arm tightened around Peter protectively.

“Yeah…he’s staying with me.” Bruce smiled softly as he headed towards the door.

“I don’t think you have anything to worry about, but I do want you to spend the night down here for monitoring just to be safe. And no checking yourself out in the morning! You wait until I give you the ‘all clear’, understand?”

“Yes, Doctor.” Tony said with a dramatic sigh that caused Bruce to roll his eyes as he flicked off the remaining lights.

“Let Friday know if you need anything.” Bruce left the room, and Tony took a deep breath, wincing as he rolled onto his side so that he could gather Peter into his arms before falling back asleep.

* * *

 

Steve leaned forward in his chair, bowing his head as he rubbed a hand over his face. He sighed deeply before abruptly resuming an upright position and pinching the bridge of his nose. Just then, the elevator doors opened, and Bucky walked back onto the floor they shared together.

“He still doing okay?” Steve asked, his brow furrowed with worry.

“Same as last time we checked.” Bucky mumbled as he plopped down onto the couch beside Steve. The Captain simply nodded his head, not saying a word. Bucky looked at his friend, swallowing hard, the guilt he felt still threatening to suffocate him.

“I didn’t mean to freeze up like that.” He said quietly, and Steve glanced up at his friend.

“What happened to Tony wasn’t your fault, Buck.”

“Yeah, but if I had just done my job…”

“Peter was right.” Bucky looked at Steve in surprise, waiting for his friend to continue. Steve looked up at him and sighed softly. “Well, right about me not having Tony’s back today. I shouldn’t have left him without warning. Even if you froze for a moment, I know that you would have snapped out of it in time.” For some reason, Steve’s confidence in him irritated Bucky slightly. “That being said, I still stand behind my decision to bring you along today.” Bucky looked up at Steve as if he had lost his mind.

“Why on earth do you still stand behind that decision? I personally think it’s one of the worst I’ve ever seen you make.”

“What? Why?” Bucky threw his arms up and shook his head.

“I froze, Steve. Tony told me I wasn’t cleared for missions, and we should have respected that. He knew I wasn’t ready. We ignored him, and who got hurt? Not us!”

“What happened to Tony wasn’t your fault.” Steve repeated and Bucky gave his friend a hard look.

“You’re right. It was **_both_** of our faults. If we had listened to Tony, he wouldn’t be lying down in Med Bay right now!”

“You don’t know that.”

“You can’t be serious right now.”

“Buck, why are you getting so upset? You’re great in action, and I wanted you on our team. It was your first mission in a long time. You did a good job.”

“I can’t believe what I’m hearing right now.” Bucky said, rubbing a hand over his face in frustration. “ ** _I_** am the sole reason the mission failed. Not only did the target escape, but Tony got hurt. Bruce said that he doesn’t understand how Tony wasn’t hurt worse than he is! How can you stand behind your decision to bring me along? And why do you constantly have so much faith in me? You and I spent seventy years apart! Maybe not much changed for you in all that time considering you were sleeping in the Atlantic, but do you want to know what was happening to me during those seven decades? I was constantly being frozen and thawed out, tortured, brainwashed, and used as a puppet to murder people! Do you know what that does to a person, Steve? I am **_not_** the same Bucky that I was before Hydra captured me. I will **_never_** be the same Bucky that I was. Can I still fight? I can fight damn well until I get too close to my opponent and start having flashbacks from my time as the Soldier. Parts of the Bucky that you remember still exist, but I’m not completely him anymore—no matter how much I wish I were! Stop trying to pretend nothing is different, Steve. Everyone we grew up with got old, and if they aren’t dead already, they soon will be. The technology that exists today is so unbelievable that even Buck Rogers* would be impressed by it. Nothing is the same. The world’s not the same, I’m not the same, and you sure as hell aren’t the same either. Where’s that plucky lil’ punk I grew up with, huh? Might have made a lot of stupid decisions, but at least he had a heart of gold. I never thought I’d see the day when Steve Rogers became such a self-righteous fat-head that he would put his own interests first while still pretending that it was for the good of everyone else around him. The kid was right. You aren’t the Captain America that this country fell in love with seventy years ago.”

“Bucky…” Steve swallowed hard, looking at his friend in surprise.

“Somewhere along the way, you lost sight of who you are. I didn’t come back to New York with the expectation that you would be exactly the same as before…but this…I **_never_** expected this. The strength, the power, the fame. Somewhere along the way, it got to you Steve. I would say that this isn’t who you are…but you know what? I just don’t know anymore.” Bucky quickly made his way back to his room, leaving Steve in stunned silence.

* * *

 

_As the blinding light rapidly approached, Tony’s life flashed before his eyes. Mere seconds later, pain shot through his body when the laser made contact with his suit. The breath was knocked out of him, and his armor became rigid. The last thing he remembered was toppling toward the ground at high-speed, closing his eyes as he took a shaky breath that he assumed would be his last._

_Everything was dark._

_“How strange.” Tony thought as he looked around the darkness, reaching up to feel that his heart was indeed pounding rapidly. “Why am I not waking up? This is when I wake up.” Just as Tony began to panic, he suddenly found himself in a clearing, lying on the ground. Turning his head slightly in the direction of the uproar he heard, the man realized that the rest of his teammates were fighting a battle without him. He tried to open his mouth, but nothing came out except a soft groan. Seemingly out of nowhere, a large hand holding a handkerchief covered his face. Tony’s eyes widened, expecting to be drugged or gagged. However, after a moment, he realized that the hand was gently cleaning the wounds on his face. “Who is that?” He wondered as his eyelids grew heavy, falling shut against his will._

_Tony was once again plunged into darkness, but for some reason, it was less frightening the second time around. He tried to wait patiently, and sure enough, he found himself back in the clearing a few moments later._

_“I’m so sorry… Please be okay.” An oddly familiar voice said beside him._

_“Who is that?” He wondered, trying to move his head in the direction of the voice he heard, though his neck wasn’t cooperating._

_“You gotta stop falling asleep on me. Will it help if I talk? Maybe you can focus on my voice, huh?” The unknown man asked nervously. Tony listened curiously, still attempting to see who was speaking. “You know, uh, it can’t be easy for you to have let me stay in your tower after everything I did. And… you not only let me stay, but you forgave me. I know I don’t deserve it, and I don’t know how you did it, but I owe you everything. And here I am, the cause of you gettin’ hit. There’s only so much a man can forgive. I understand that, but you can’t die on me, okay? I still haven’t gotten around to thanking you properly. I…used to be great with words… but I’m not so great with them anymore. It’s hard to speak around people… Wanna know something I haven’t even told Steve? I know that I’m safe now. I’m not the Soldier, and I’m not with Hydra…but sometimes I’m still afraid I’ll be punished for speaking. Stupid I guess, but it actually scares me. Maybe that’s why Shuri and Peter feel so safe. They’re a lot younger than anyone who ever experimented on me or tortured me. You know, the other day I actually thought Steve was going to hit me? He was just reaching to grab something nearby, but my instinct was to duck away. Does that make me a coward? Guess it does…” Tony turned his head enough to glance in the direction of the voice, though he already knew who was speaking. “You know, I could go on and on about what being with Hydra did to me. Hardly recognize myself. Positively terrifying. I have nightmares about it almost every night…You must have nightmares too, huh? Last night was the second time you were down in the kitchen so late. I wonder what yours are about… You know, I hardly know anything about you. I knew your father better than you…” Bucky trailed off, and Tony could see through half-lidded eyes that the Super Soldier was distressed. “Sorry…I…I wish I could go undo what I did as the Soldier…uh…I…” Bucky’s voice softened so much that Tony had to strain to hear it. “This is stupid… even if you can hear me, I’m probably just making things worse…” Bucky went quiet, looking in Tony’s direction for several moments before he suddenly leaned forward, taking off his leather jacket and folding it. Tony felt his head being lifted as Bucky slipped the jacket beneath it. “Hope it helps…the ground can’t be that comfortable.” The man muttered, and Tony felt his eyes fall shut once more._

With a loud gasp, Tony woke suddenly. He looked around the dark room, realizing that he was back in Med Bay. After glancing down to ensure that Peter was still safely asleep beside him, he breathed a long sigh of relief before laying his head back against his pillow. That was not an ordinary dream. It had really happened; Tony was certain of that. However, he wasn’t sure he could call it a nightmare either. It certainly wasn’t as haunting as the other memories he often re-lived in his sleep. The genius mulled over his dream, reflecting on Bucky’s words as he reached up to absent-mindedly play with Peter’s curls. After several minutes of thought, Tony realized that he suddenly viewed the Super Soldier in a completely different light. While he hadn’t been scared of the man in a while, Tony was beginning to realize just how gentle Bucky was. In addition, it seemed that the super soldier was probably far more nervous around Tony than Tony was around him. Staring at the ceiling, Tony continued to reflect on the dream for a while longer until he was pulled from his thoughts by a voice beside him.

“Tony?” The man looked down at Peter, who was looking up at him with wide, yet tired, eyes. The teen’s eyes were filled with fear and worry, and tears were already threatening to spill from them at any moment. Tony’s heart ached—he had never seen Peter look so young in the entire time he had known him.

“I’m okay, Bud.” Tony said softly as he shifted to pull the boy closer, ignoring the discomfort the new position brought. Tears immediately began to stream down Peter’s cheeks as he clung tightly to Tony, crying softly into the man’s neck. Tony held Peter, allowing him to cry for several minutes before slowly pulling away. Reaching up with his casted wrist, Tony used his thumb to brush the tears from Peter’s cheeks as the teen tried to stop crying. “C’mon, Pete. You gotta cut that out. You’re going to give yourself a headache if you keep crying.”

“Already got one.” He mumbled before re-attaching himself to Tony.

“Pete, I promise I’m okay. Bruce told me so himself when I woke up last night.”

“You woke up and you didn’t wake me up?”

“No, I heard that you had a rough day. That’s why I let you sleep down here instead of having Thor take you to bed.” Peter just dropped his head to Tony’s shoulder and sniffled.

“I was so scared.” He whispered; the smallness of his voice just about broke Tony’s heart.

“Well, I’m not going anywhere. You’re stuck with me.” Tony laughed softly and Peter gently hit his arm with no real conviction.

“Don’t say it like that.” Peter said with a huff. He looked back up at Tony, blinking back a few tears. “I’m sorry I wasn’t next to you sooner… I tried to be, but Dr. Banner wouldn’t even let me touch you for so long…” Tony shook his head slightly.

“It’s okay, Pete. Bruce told me you were here the whole time…but even if you weren’t, I wouldn’t have been upset. I was out cold.”

“But…I was so worried you’d be stuck in a nightmare scared, and I couldn’t tell anyone because I promised I wouldn’t. When Dr. Banner wouldn’t let me see you, I was so worried…and then he let me in and you were just lying here… and I was so scared I—I started crying… and then Dr. Banner told me you were going to be fine. After he explained your injuries, I understood that you would be okay…but it was still just awful seeing you lay here so still, and he wouldn’t let me lay here with you. Wouldn’t even let me hold your hand because my pulse could’ve messed with his readings.” Peter wiped his moist eyes. “I was so worried, Tony. I didn’t want you to be alone, but I thought you’d be more upset if I told the others about your bad dreams.” Tony stared at Peter in surprise. Of course the teenager would understand his injuries weren’t life-threatening—Peter was a smart kid who had a nurse for an aunt. Suddenly pulling Peter closer, Tony buried his face into the boy’s hair to hide his misty eyes. Peter hadn’t spent the day crying out of childlike naivety; he had been worried sick that Tony would be trapped all alone in a nightmare from which he couldn’t awake.

“Pete…you were trying to calm me down?” Tony asked, trying to keep the emotions from his voice.

“I wanted to… but even if Dr. Banner wasn’t paying attention, Loki wouldn’t let me touch you either…I just thought if you felt me, then you’d know it was okay even if you were trapped somewhere bad in your dreams.” Several tears escaped from Tony’s eyes. Even his dearest friends had never taken the time to understand him the way that Peter had. Overcome with emotions, Tony pressed a soft kiss into Peter’s hair, squeezing the boy just a little bit tighter.

“I promise I didn’t have a bad dream. Well, I sort of had one a bit ago.” Tony said, wondering if he could even truly classify that dream as a nightmare. “But then I woke up and you were here.” He said as he rubbed Peter’s back. “How could I not feel safe with my hero next to me, huh?” He pulled his face from Peter’s hair, smiling as he heard the boy laugh.

“Spiderman is a pretty good hero.”

“He is, but I wasn’t talking about Spiderman.” The teenager blinked a few times before Tony reached up to ruffle his hair. “You. I was talking about you, Peter.”

“Me?” The boy paused for a moment before laughing as if Tony had just told him a joke. “What are you talking about?”

“Kid, you’ve done something for me that not a single other person in my life has ever been able to do for me.”

“I have? What’s that?”

“You’ve taught me how to trust completely and what it feels like to be loved unconditionally.”  

“Not even Miss Potts did that?” Peter asked in surprise. Tony recalled Pepper’s reactions to his nightmares when they had been dating. Even now, the woman was not afraid to show her irritation at much of Tony’s anxiety-ridden behavior. Though he didn’t fault her at all for her reaction to what he knew was often childlike conduct, Peter had managed to break down all of Tony’s walls and make him feel completely safe. Instead of chastising Tony for his behavior or belittling his feelings, Peter had taken the time to see through his defense mechanisms, choosing to comfort Tony when he was upset rather than criticize him.

“Nope. Only you, Kid.” Peter was quiet for several moments before he released a soft sigh.

“That’s just not right. You deserve more love.” Peter’s words made Tony chuckle softly.

“Well, the jury’s out on that, Kid.” Tony shifted to change into a more comfortable position, Peter reaching out to help him move before he fluffed Tony’s pillows. “I heard you yelled at Steve.” Tony said as he watched Peter climb off the bed.

“He deserved it.”

“Peter…”

“What? He did!”

“Well…I’m not saying that he didn’t,” Tony said, recalling how hurt he was when he realized that the other man had once again betrayed his trust in favor of Bucky. “But I get the impression that you were pretty harsh on him.”

“How can you say that after everything that he’s done to you?”

“Kid—“

“Ever since I found out the truth about Siberia, I’ve started paying more attention to the way that he treats you… He doesn’t treat you very well, and I don’t like it. He’s known you even longer than I have. Why didn’t he show you what it means to be loved? I didn’t say anything to him that was untrue. I just want him to realize that what he’s doing to you isn’t right. It’s not what Captain America would do, and it’s not what good friends would do either.”

“Peter, sometimes even the best of friends don’t always see eye-to-eye on things. Shit happens. You can’t protect me from everything.” Tony attempted to tease the boy in order to lighten the mood, but Peter met the man’s light-hearted gaze with a stubborn look of defiance.

“Watch me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *It just dawned on me for the first time how ironic it is that there is a character named Buck Rogers who was accidentally frozen and wakes up in the distant future. For anyone unfamiliar with the character, he was a fictional character from a space opera (old radio program) In addition to having comic strips and later a tv program and movies. He would have been quite a popular character around the time Steve and Bucky were growing up.
> 
> I read all your comments on the last chapter-I'm not ignoring you! Just been so busy, and I have to wake up in about 3 hours to go to work, so I'll reply to all of your comments on the last chapter (and this one) tomorrow. ♥


	20. Chapter 20

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, remember me? The person who promised a new chapter every Thursday? Well, winter has turned me into a bit of a liar for the past several weeks, and I do apologize. That being said, I combined two chapters into one to make up for being a few days late. Hope you enjoy this extra long chapter!
> 
> Sidenote- Two chapters ago, people were having a debate in the comments over something that happened in the story, and can I just tell you guys how much I loved that? No one was being disrespectful to me or anyone else; you guys were just discussing the characters and their actions, and it reminded me of a literature class debate from my college days. I showed the comments to my roommate, (who does not read my fic) and she was shocked that there were actual intellectual debates going on over this story. So I just want to say thank you, because it was very interesting and enjoyable for me to read. :)

“Anthony Edward Stark, get back in your bed right now!”

“Pete, if I don’t get some coffee, I might die.” Tony said, laughing at the exasperated way in which the teenager was nagging him.

“Okay, first of all, that’s a major exaggeration. Second, I’ll go get it for you. Just go lay down.”

“I need to stretch my legs.”

“Dr. Banner hasn’t cleared you yet!”

“It’ll take five minutes, and then I’ll be back. I’m going stir-crazy.”

“Not until he clears you!”

“Kid, I’m just going to the lounge, it’s not like I’m making a Starbucks run.” Tony said as he headed towards the door to the hallway, his back to the teen. Peter held up his phone, waiting for Tony to turn back around.

“Set one foot into that hallway before Dr. Banner clears you, and I swear to God that I’ll call Miss Potts.” Tony whirled around in surprise.

“You’re threatening me with Pepper?”

“She’ll be here in like two hours. Unless you want a two-hour long phone lecture and a smack upside the head when she gets here, I wouldn’t set foot in that hallway.” Tony glanced at the door before looking back at Peter. After a moment of hesitation, Tony reluctantly moved back toward his bed.

“Fine, you win. Geez, what a brat!” Tony huffed, though there was not a trace of venom in his words. 

“Well, that’s certainly the pot calling the kettle black.” Tony gasped in mock indignation which caused Peter to smirk.

“How right you are, Little One.” Loki said, entering the room with an amused expression on his face. Peter grinned as Tony rolled his eyes.

“Well, if it isn’t Marvin the Martian.” The genius said as he sat on his bed. “The perfect addition to a bossy teenager.” Loki laughed at the man’s sarcastic remark.

“How are you feeling this morning?” The god’s smooth voice softened as he asked the question, and Tony found himself surprised at the concern he saw reflected in Loki’s eyes.

“I’d feel better if I weren’t stuck down here.”

“I’m sure that Bruce will be down here soon.” Loki moved beside Tony, fixing the pillows at the head of the bed before gently touching Tony’s shoulder. “Until then, you should lie down.”

“Oh please. I don’t need to lie down. All I really need is a cup of—“

“It’s not a request, Anthony.” Loki said, leaving no room for argument. Tony blinked as the prince moved to grab the blanket that had been previously kicked to the foot of the bed. The man opened his mouth to protest, but when Loki turned back to him with a raised eyebrow, he began slowly moving back against the pillows with a grimace. He lay down as Loki draped the blanket over him, shooting Peter a dirty look when he heard the boy snickering from across the room.

“I’m telling you, you’re overreacting. I’m fine.”

“I’ve seen you wince three times since I entered the room. While your life may no longer be in danger, you most certainly are not fine.”

“I’m Iron Man!”

“Yes, but that doesn’t mean that you’re actually made of iron.” Peter pointed out. Tony opened his mouth to respond, though he never got the chance.

“An excellent point, Peter.” Bruce said as he walked into Med Bay. Tony immediately lit up, a grin spreading across his face.

“Brucie Bear. My angel, my savior. You came just in time to pardon me. These wardens over here are pretty tough.” Bruce chuckled as he shook his head.

“Whoever said that doctors make the worst patients has clearly never met you.”

“Oh, come on. I’m still here, aren’t I?” Peter huffed at the sheer audacity of Tony’s question, and Bruce glanced at the boy before looking back at his friend.

“I’m down here this early because Friday woke me up, alerting me that you intended to leave Med Bay without my permission.” When Tony looked to the side and whistled innocently, Bruce just shook his head. “Yeah, that’s what I thought. Well, I’m down here now. Let me take a look.” Carefully moving Tony’s casted hand to the side, Bruce pulled back the blanket and lifted the man’s shirt as he began to check the bruising on his side. He gently pressed on a few areas, looking up at Tony after he heard the man inhale sharply. “Did that hurt?”

“No.”

“Tony.”

“…A little.” Bruce nodded in consideration, continuing to examine the rest of Tony’s bruised torso carefully. Once finished, he lowered Tony’s shirt and grabbed a penlight off a nearby table, using it to check Tony’s pupils before humming in approval.

“So, am I a free man now?” Tony asked impatiently as Bruce clicked off the small light.

“For now.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means that you need to rest for a few days. Stay off your feet and try not to use your right hand too much until your wrist begins to heal. If you overdo it, you’re going to end up back down here—possibly for more than one night.” Bruce warned.

“Rest. Got it.” Tony said with a grin as he quickly hopped off the bed. 

“One more thing.” Bruce said as he glanced at Tony, who was making a beeline for the door. “No alcohol and no caffeine for a few days.”

“What?!”

“One of the smartest men alive, and yet when I remind him of something that should be common sense, he acts surprised. Maybe the concussion is worse than I realized.” Bruce said in exasperation as he turned to Peter and Loki, who shook their heads, both giving the doctor a sympathetic look.

“Okay, okay. No alcohol, no caffeine. As long as I’m not stuck down here.” Tony agreed quickly. Bruce looked at his friend for several moments as if deciding whether to believe him or not. Finally, he nodded his head.

“You’re free to go.” Tony grinned victoriously. “Let’s order breakfast to celebrate my freedom! Friday, why don’t you have some bagels and cream cheese sent over from that little bakery a few streets over.”

“Right away, Boss.”

“Oh…and Friday? Have a lot of decaf sent over too—I’m going to need it.”

* * *

 

When the four arrived at the lounge to wait for the food and coffee that Tony had ordered, they were greeted by the sound of music softly drifting through the air. Peter was the first one out of the lift, and he looked around curiously until he spotted Bucky, fast asleep in an armchair near the TV. Though Peter seemed unfazed as he approached the man, the other three stopped in surprise as they stared at the sleeping super soldier. Wrapped in a blanket with his feet tucked up under him, the man had never appeared less threatening since his arrival at the tower. As Tony observed the other man’s softened features visible through the long hair that had fallen to conceal part of his face, it actually sickened him to think that someone—who was clearly so gentle—had been kept prisoner and forced to commit heinous crimes against his will.

“Bucky…Hey, Bucky?” Peter asked softly, gently shaking the man’s shoulder. Bucky’s eyes flew open, and he recoiled at the touch, fear evident in his eyes. Peter straightened up in surprise as the super soldier pulled the blanket closer around him as if he feared it would be taken away from him. After a brief moment, Bucky realized where he was, relaxing immediately as Peter’s face registered in his mind.

“I’m sorry.” The man said, clearly embarrassed as he glanced at the three men behind Peter. “I—I must have fallen asleep down here. “

“It’s okay.” Peter said. “I was just going to suggest that you move to your room—or at least to a couch. Doesn’t look very comfortable…you might hurt your neck sleeping like that.”

“I’m very comfortable.” Bucky reassured the boy, smiling briefly before he turned his attention to the injured man behind Peter. “You’re up and walking? How do you feel?” He leaned forward as he spoke to Tony, his expression a combination of concern and relief. Though momentarily taken aback at the familiar way in which Bucky addressed him, Tony answered quickly.

“I feel great now that I’m out of that prison commonly referred to as ‘Med Bay’.” Bruce and Peter rolled their eyes in unison as Loki moved beside Tony, resting his hand on the man’s back.

“You still need to take it easy unless you want to end up there again, Anthony.” The god said as he gently nudged Tony toward a couch.

“Loki, standing up for a few minutes isn’t going to kill me.” The genius protested, though he did not hesitate in moving to sit down as he found himself feeling achier than he’d care to admit. The prince draped a blanket over him as Peter grabbed a throw pillow to place behind Tony’s back. Bruce smiled in approval as he watched.

“You know, it’s so refreshing having you two around. For once, I don’t have to worry alone about Tony ignoring my advice and furthering his injuries.” Bruce teased, glancing quickly in Tony’s direction before looking back at Peter and Loki.

“If we all take shifts babysitting him, it shouldn’t be too overwhelming.” Peter tried to keep a straight face as he looked Bruce, though a small giggle did slip past his lips.

“Hello, I’m right here! Reindeer Games, you have impeccable manners. Tell Bruce and Pete that it’s rude to talk about someone else right in front of them.”

“While it is typically in poor taste to discuss others in their presence, there are exceptions to every rule. I feel that you, My Dear Anthony, are one of those exceptions.”

“I see how it is, I—“ Tony sputtered, interrupting himself as he saw the doors to the elevator open. “Happy!” A smile lit up his face as he called out to his friend entering the lounge. “Come defend me, they’re all ganging up against me!” Happy simply raised an eyebrow as he moved closer into the room, pointing at Peter with his thumb.

“If the kid’s even against you, then I have a feeling you’re the one causing some sort of trouble.” Though his voice was even, a smile tugged at the corner of his lips as he knelt down in front of Tony, examining the bruising toward the top of his left cheek. “You had us all worried there for a while. You slept straight through the entire day.” Happy said, concern evident in his eyes.

“C’mon, you know I don’t half-ass anything. Not even a concussion.” Tony joked. Happy straightened back up with a sigh.

“You see, that right there is exactly why you worry everyone half to death when you get hurt. No regard for your personal safety. Honestly, I sometimes wonder how you ever made it past thirty.”

“Just unlucky, I guess.” Tony said with an aggravating smirk. Happy looked up at the ceiling and shook his head as Bruce pinched the bridge of his nose and Loki once again rolled his eyes. If anyone else had made the remark, Peter would have laughed and responded with a hearty, ‘I know, right?’. However, Peter was fairly certain that Tony was only half-joking, and he frowned as he moved to plop down onto the sofa beside the man.

“Wow. Rude.”

“What is?” Tony asked, confused by Peter’s remark.

“If you’d have died sooner, you wouldn’t have met me!”

“Oh, all right. I guess **_one_** good thing came out of living past thirty.”

“Only one? Now I’m offended.” Bruce said in a teasing manner as he folded his arms over his chest.

“As am I.” Loki agreed.

“Please—let’s not do this before I’ve had my coffee.” Tony said as he rubbed his eyes, sighing deeply for dramatic effect.

“Tony!” The genius moved his hand, head snapping up to see Thor jogging out of the elevator, Natasha not far behind him. The large god moved toward his friend, a smile spreading across his face. “You look well this morning.” Thor said, beaming as he looked over Tony.

“Thank you, **_Thor_**!” Tony said pointedly as he shot a quick glare in Bruce and Loki’s direction. “It’s nice to know that **_someone_** here can see that I’m perfectly fine.” Natasha walked up beside Thor, eyebrow raised as she looked Tony up and down a few times.

“Are you being an insufferable patient?” The woman asked with a knowing smirk.

“No!” Tony denied vehemently, though Bruce, Loki, and Peter’s resounding ‘Yes’ drowned him out. The genius shot the other three a dirty look, prompting Bucky to laugh softly from across the room. When the others turned to look at him, Bucky froze, realizing that he must have laughed aloud. However, to his great surprise, the others joined him in laughter—even Tony. A surreal sense of happiness bubbled up inside of the super soldier; he could not remember the last time that he had genuinely laughed with others. Something about allowing himself to enjoy a trivial moment felt incredibly freeing, and for a brief moment, Bucky felt a little bit like the man he had been before his time with Hydra.

* * *

 

It was nearly ten o’clock, and Bucky had still not left his chair in the lounge. He desperately wanted to speak to Tony alone, to apologize for not having listened to him and to ask if there was anything he could do to try and help Tony until he was fully healed. That task, however, seemed easier said than done as Tony was being fawned over by everyone else in the tower. Peter was curled up next to the man, using his phone to find Tony Stark appreciation posts online, reading them aloud to his mentor—who clearly loved hearing the praise. Happy stood behind the couch, massaging Tony’s shoulders, occasionally snorting at something that Peter read. Loki had used his magic to transform the cast on Tony’s wrist into a far more stylish one of red and gold before proceeding to watch Happy like a hawk, occasionally reminding the man to be gentle with Tony. Natasha kept an eye on the billionaire’s mug, getting up to replenish it every time he was close to finishing his coffee. Thor and Bruce sat beside Natasha, occasionally interrupting Peter to ask Tony how he felt or if he wanted anything. Wanda and Vision, who had entered the lounge shortly before Tony’s coffee and bagels arrived, had both been relieved to see that Tony was making a quick recovery. Though he was already surrounded by others, they also seemed to be keeping a close eye on Tony in the event that the other six people catering to his every whim needed any help. The last to enter the lounge that morning had been Sam. Unlike the others, he had entered the lounge as if it were any other day, settling himself onto an empty chair beside Bucky before glancing in Tony’s direction.

“Damn, Stark. Feel as shitty as you look?” Sam gibed, the corner of his lips curling up in amusement. Tony, who clearly appreciated that someone was treating him normally, smirked in response.

“You wish you could look like this on a good day.” Sam chuckled.

“Still full of sass.”

“It’s my trademark.” Tony shrugged slightly before turning back to Peter. Sam reclined in his chair, stifling a yawn as he turned to look at Bucky.

“I know he was shot out of the sky by a laser,” The man said as he gestured at Tony, “But what’s your excuse for looking like crap?” Bucky scowled at Sam for a moment before his features softened and he shrugged his shoulders apathetically.

“Didn’t sleep well.”

“How come?”

“Just one of those nights, I guess.” Sam did not reply immediately, listening to the others for several moments before glancing back at the man beside him.

“Something to do with Steve?” Bucky looked up in surprise. When he didn’t reply, Sam continued speaking, voice low enough that the others were not able to hear him. “He’s the only one not up here, and he also made that horrible decision to bring you along yesterday. Just makes sense.”

“You thought it was a bad decision too?”

“Well, yeah. I mean, last time I fought with you, we ended up getting stuck to the floor of an airport by Spider Boy over there.” He said, gesturing at Peter.

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Bucky asked softly. Sam seemed surprised by the question, but he answered it with little hesitation.

“Would probably have just made him more determined to bring you along. If Steve’s made up his mind, then no one can talk him out of it—not even Tony or Natasha.” Bucky exhaled as he slumped back into his chair, his eyes going over to Tony.

“I bet I could have talked him out of it.”

“Probably.” Bucky looked back at Sam in surprise. “Still doesn’t make what happened your fault though.” Sam stood up and stretched. “I need some coffee.” The man disappeared into the kitchen, leaving Bucky to mull over his words when the super soldier noticed the elevator doors open. Two beautiful women, that he had never before seen, stepped out of the lift and began walking quickly toward the sitting area.

“Tony!” The woman with the strawberry-blonde ponytail called out, causing the others to look in the direction of the two women. Bucky watched as Tony’s face lit up.

“Both of my girls here to visit me on a Wednesday morning? Maybe I should get injured more often.” The man said with a flirtatious smile. The woman with the long brown hair rolled her eyes as she moved to sit between Tony and Peter, who had moved to the edge of the couch to allow the woman to sit down. The fair-haired woman sat beside Tony as Loki stood up, graciously offering his seat to the woman before he moved to sit on the arm of the adjacent couch where his brother sat. Bucky watched as the woman sat down, her ponytail bouncing slightly as she looked Tony up and down with worried eyes.

“Does your arm hurt?”

“Not a bit.”

“Good!” The woman said as she gently hit Tony’s arm.

“Hey!”

“How dare you go off and get hurt—especially when I’m out of town!” Tony pouted, turning to the brunette on his other side.

“May, are you just going to let her hit me like that?”

“I checked you out when I came to visit last night. I’m sure Pepper didn’t hurt you.” May said, an amused smile on her face. Tony huffed slightly, turning back to Pepper. He opened his mouth, but before he could speak, the woman had wrapped her arms around him. A soft smile fell upon Tony’s lips as he returned the hug, his forehead falling to the woman’s shoulder. The hug lasted for several moments before Pepper pulled away, and Bucky watched as Tony’s head remained down for another moment, fingers gripping the woman’s blazer tightly; he clearly did not want the embrace to end. When he finally released Pepper’s jacket, Tony frowned and leaned back slightly until he felt his back touching May, which prompted the woman to reach up and squeeze his arm gently. He seemed to be waiting for her to pull away, but when she did not, he relaxed.

“Pep, I’m okay. Bruce said as long as I take it easy that I’ll be fine.”

“You? Take it easy?” She asked skeptically. Peter snorted, and Tony turned to look behind him.

“Thanks for backing me up, Buddy. Really appreciate it.” Peter stuck his tongue out, leaning his chin on the shoulder of the woman in front of him as Tony turned back to face Pepper. At that moment, Sam walked out of the kitchen, carrying a large mug of coffee in his hand and a bagel in his mouth. Once he had sat back down in his seat beside Bucky, the super soldier glanced at him before leaning slightly to the side.

“Who are the dames?” Bucky asked in a low voice; Sam nearly choked on his bagel.

“Pepper and May. And this isn’t the 40’s, Man. Girls don’t want to be called ‘dames’.”

“Sorry…I didn’t know.”

“Doesn’t bother me. Just don’t let them hear you say it.” Bucky furrowed his brow, nodding solemnly before he glanced back in the direction of the two women.

“Who are they?”

“Pepper is Tony’s…I don’t really know how to describe her. She used to work for him. Then he made her the CEO of his company. They dated for a while too. Maybe she’s like his best friend? I don’t know.” Sam said with a dismissive shrug before nodding at the woman on Tony’s other side. “May is Peter’s aunt. Sometimes Tony flirts with her, and other times he acts like her kid. Dude’s one of the greatest heroes on the planet, but he’s kinda messed up.”

“Aren’t we all?” Bucky asked dryly. Sam laughed before taking a sip of coffee.

 “Ya got me there.” The two returned to a comfortable silence as Sam ate his late breakfast and the former assassin surveyed the others around him. He noticed that Tony’s body language had changed since the women entered. The man seemed to be more relaxed, and he did not protest as much when the women catered to him as he did when the other Avengers catered to him. Bucky also observed that Peter also seemed more relaxed, moving away from Tony for the first time that morning to show Bruce a science meme he had seen on Instagram. Happy returned from the kitchen, where he had gone to get a cup of coffee, and though he sat down on the other side of the room typing out messages on the phone that he had been neglecting, he still glanced up at Tony from time to time to ensure that the man did not need him. In fact, as Bucky looked from person to person, he noticed that every single person in the room seemed to be glancing at Tony from time to time to make sure that the man didn’t need anything. Though he had only noticed such behavior from a few of the others prior to the accident, Bucky could see now just how much everyone adored Tony, even if some of the others had been unwittingly taking him for granted before he was hurt.

_“I wonder what it’s like to be loved like that? It must feel wonderful.”_ Bucky thought to himself as he watched Pepper push the hair off Tony’s forehead. The man smiled at her in return as if he had forgotten there was anyone else in the room with them. _“What a nice smile. Guess I’d be smiling like that too if I had such a pretty girl fussin’ over me.”_

“Bucky! Bucky?” The super soldier was startled from his thoughts as he turned to see Peter walking toward him, his aunt beside him.

“This is my Aunt May. May, this is Bucky.” Bucky stood up quickly, offering his hand for May to shake.

“I’m very glad to meet you, Miss May.” Bucky said as he shook May’s hand. “I’m sorry I look like this.” Bucky said, suddenly embarrassed that he was wearing the soft sweatpants and t-shirt he had quickly grown to love.

“You look fine to me, and just 'May' is fine.” The woman said with a kind smile as she returned the handshake. “It’s quite an honor to meet you.” Bucky blinked, confused by May’s statement.

“It…is?”

“Of course it is. And please, sit down.” May said as she motioned for Bucky to return to his seat. The man glanced around in confusion, the idea at sitting in the presence of a lady unthinkable. However, after noting that the other men in the room remained seated and May didn’t seem bothered in the slightest by it, he reluctantly sat back down.

“You have lovely hair.” Bucky said after a moment, staring at May’s long locks as she sat beside him. She laughed softly, touching a strand of her hair.

“Thank you. Your hair is also very nice.” Bucky chuckled uncomfortably; he wasn’t used to receiving compliments anymore.

“The…uh, the style these days is natural?” He asked, briefly glancing at the other women in the room before returning his eyes to May.

“I suppose it is—well at least compared to the women of the 1930s and 40s.” May said with an airy laugh. Bucky smiled; he was sure Peter and gotten his friendly personality from his aunt. Finding himself increasingly more comfortable the longer he spoke with May, he was soon stringing together multiple sentences of witty banter the way he did with Peter and Shuri. Before Bucky even realized it, over an hour had passed.

“Sweetheart, what time is it?” May called out to Peter, who had returned to his spot beside Tony.

“Uhh…” Peter looked down at his phone. “Almost noon.”

“That’s what I figured. I’d better be on my way soon. My shift starts at 12:30 today.”

“I need to get going too.” Pepper said as she glanced at the small watch on her wrist. “I’ve already missed one meeting and I have another at one.”

“Pep, you missed a meeting to visit me?” Tony asked, his voice soft with surprise. “Should I get hurt more often?”

“If you even think of intentionally getting hurt, I’ll never speak to you again.” The woman said, raising an eyebrow. Tony put his hands up in surrender and Pepper gave him a nod of approval as she rose to her feet.

“Happy, you’ll drive me?”

“Of course, I need to get some work done myself.”

“May, you want to come so we can drop you at the hospital?” Pepper asked as she walked toward her friend.

“That’d be great. Oh, Pepper, have you met Bucky yet?”

“I haven’t! I’m so sorry that I didn’t introduce myself sooner!” The woman said with an embarrassed laugh as she rushed over and held out her hand. Bucky jumped to his feet, shaking her hand firmly as he mustered a smile.

“Not at all, Miss Pepper. I’m very glad to meet you.”

“What a gentleman!” Pepper declared as Bucky stood to greet her. “Someone could learn a thing or two from you.” She said in a teasing manner as she glanced at Tony.

“I resent that! I’m an injured man!”

“Funny how you only claim to be injured when it conveniences you.” Peter said with an impish grin. Tony turned to him with a look of betrayal on his face.

“Whose side are you on?” Peter just laughed as he looked at his mentor.

“We really have to be on our way.” Pepper said quickly before looking back at Bucky. “Let’s get better acquainted next time, hm?”

“Yes, Ma’am.” Pepper and May turned to leave and Bucky sat back down, wondering if he might soon finally get a chance to talk to Tony alone. The woman said their goodbyes to everyone else, and Happy just nodded in the direction of the room, before the three disappeared into the elevator.

“Well, I think I might head down to my lab for a bit.” Tony said as he pushed himself up off the couch, hiding his grimace with a pained chuckle.

“Uh, hold on a minute.” Bruce said as he directed his attention towards the genius. “You’re not going anywhere, Tony.”

“I’ll just be sitting on a stool.” Tony said with a wave of his hand.

“You’re lucky that your fractured wrist can be healed just by being set. If you hurt it further, you might end up needing surgery.”

“…That’s fine. I’ll work with one hand.”

“Your wrist isn’t the only injury you sustained yesterday. Didn’t we talk about you being a good patient?”

“I do believe I recall that conversation.” Loki chimed in. Tony rolled his eyes.

“C’mon, can’t a guy relax around here?”

“You can.” Bruce said, giving his friend a knowing smile. “Your lab isn’t going anywhere. Give it a few days for your body to begin healing before you go back to work. Okay?”

“…All right.” As nice as it was to do nothing from time to time, Tony knew that if he spent too long with idle hands, his anxiety would increase. However, fighting the others wasn’t worth it; he could just spend the next several nights in his lab after everyone else went to bed. Sighing in resignation, he plopped back down onto the couch. “Well, what do you suggest I do if I’m stuck up here?”

“Movie day! Movie day!” Peter started to chant. Tony laughed as he picked up a pillow, gently smacking Peter with it.

“All right, all right. We’ll have a movie day.”

* * *

 

It was nearly seven o’clock in the evening and Bucky was beginning to feel irritable—partly because he was never able to get Tony alone to apologize to him, and partly because Steve had not bothered to show his face even once throughout the entire day. There was no doubt in Bucky’s mind that Steve had spent the entire day moping around on his floor, and he wondered if his friend had even considered a single word he had said before the other super soldier threw himself a pity party. Steve hadn’t even bothered to check on Tony, and though the billionaire had so many other lovely people caring for him, Bucky was sure that it must have hurt Tony that Steve never came to check on him once. After all, from the little Bucky knew of their friendship, it seemed that Tony cared a great deal about Steve. Shaking himself from his thoughts, he turned his attention back toward the screen as he realized that he was missing the climax of the movie, looking up just in time to see Flynn Rider cut off Rapunzel’s magic hair in order to save her from Mother Gothel. Bucky gasped softly as he heard Peter loudly whisper.

“True poetic cinema!” Bucky glanced over at Peter; who was way too into the movie. While looking in the teen's direction, he noticed that Tony was fast asleep, his head on Loki’s shoulder. Loki moved one of his long legs up gracefully, using his foot to nudge Peter’s side. When Peter turned around, Loki held a finger to his lips, and Peter snickered as he whipped out his phone, taking a picture of Tony curled up beside Loki before the god could stop him. Loki rolled his eyes and shook his head as Peter turned back to watch the last few moments of the movie, though he seemed more amused than annoyed. Once the movie had ended, Peter softly asked Friday to turn the lights up.

“Thor, are you crying?” He asked softly as he looked at the large god across the room. Thor wiped a single tear from his eye.

“I can relate to Rapunzel. Having my hair cut off was a truly traumatic experience.” Loki rolled his eyes.

“Yes, Thor. ** _You’re_** the one that can truly understand her life. Tell me, what was it like being raised by an ancient being who kidnapped you as a baby and hid your royal lineage from you for their own gain?” Thor’s face fell, and he looked far sadder than he had moments ago.

“Loki…”

“Wow. Tea.” Peter said as he looked between Loki and Thor with owlish eyes.

“I beg your pardon?” Loki asked in confusion.

“I think he’s trying to say that what you said is the harsh truth?” Bucky blurted out. Peter gave him a thumbs up and nodded and Loki cleared his throat.

“I see…Anyway, we should probably wake Anthony up so that he can go to—“

“Let him sleep here. He doesn’t sleep well. I don’t want you to wake him up.” Peter interrupted softly.

“Peter, he’ll wake up much more rested if he sleeps in a bed, and he needs plenty of sleep right now.” Bruce tried to reason with Peter, but the teen shook his head.

“We’re not waking him up.”

“It’s no matter.” Thor said as he stood up, walking over to the couch and picking up Tony as if he weighed nothing. “I’ll take him upstairs.” Thor said with a pleased smile. Peter started laughing, muffling the sound with his hand as he grabbed his phone again. He stood up, taking a picture of The Asgardian King holding Iron Man as if he were a baby.

“Tony’s gonna ** _hate_** this. I need to send this to Miss Potts.” He said, wiping away a tear as he tried to control his laughter. Thor just chuckled softly.

“Come with me Peter, I’m not sure Friday would grant me access to Tony’s floor without you.”

“Okay!” Peter said in a loud whisper as he took a snap of Thor carrying Tony to send to Ned. Bucky sighed softly as he watched Thor carry the genius away. Apparently, his apology would have to wait for another day.

* * *

 

Tony sat up, clawing wildly at his neck as he gasped for air. His fingers tangled into a blanket and he pulled it away, his breath hitching as he looked around the darkness frantically. When he saw something glowing nearby, he realized that it was the small light he always kept on his bedside table. He released a shaky breath of relief while running a hand over his face.

“Lights, Fri.” The AI complied immediately, raising the lights to a comfortable level, and Tony rubbed his temple as he tried to shake off the nightmare that still felt too real. “What time is it?”

“It’s just before three.”

“I don’t remember going to bed.” Tony said after a minute of silence.

“You fell asleep in the lounge. The elder Mr. Odinson brought you up here. Peter actually sent me a picture of him carrying you. He thought you might like to see it. Shall I pull it up for you?” Tony groaned and shook his head.

“I’m too sober for that.” The man said before standing up, wrapping his thick, plush blanket around his shoulders. “I’m going downstairs.” He declared as he shuffled from his room, across the rest of his apartment, and into the elevator. Tony yawned as he felt the car move and he ran a hand across his tired eyes. He would only have a few hours in his lab before he’d have to sneak back upstairs, but at least it was better than no time in his sanctuary—for once his nightmare had a silver lining. As the door opened, Tony yawned again as he stepped out and onto the floor, nearly jumping out of his skin when he heard someone call his name.

“Tony?” He looked up to see that Friday had not taken him to his lab, but to the lounge. Turning in the direction of the voice, he saw Bucky reclining on one of the couches. Groaning internally, Tony took a few steps forward. He wasn’t sure if Friday had taken him to the lounge since he had chosen to go there the last time he had a bad dream, or if Bruce had given Friday specific instructions to keep Tony away from his lab. Either way, he’d have to have a little talk with her later.

“We meet again. Can’t sleep either?” Tony asked, though he made no move to sit down.

“Nah…uh, can I talk to you about something?” The genius had to physically restrain himself from rolling his eyes or huffing in annoyance—he really just want to go tinker in his lab.

“I guess so.” He said with a shrug as he moved to sit across from the super soldier. “What’s up?”

“I just… I really want you to know how sorry I am for everything. Steve and I should have listened to you. I shouldn’t have gone on that mission. I made a huge mess of everything, and there probably isn’t anything I could do to make it better, but if you can think of anything, I—“

“Why are you apologizing again?” Tony asked, a quizzical look on his face. Bucky returned the confused gaze, his head tilting to the side.

“Again?”

“Yeah…you apologized out in that field, remember?” Bucky’s eyes grew larger.

“You heard that?”

“Yep.” Bucky looked down in embarrassment. He had gotten far too personal with Tony during that apology. He really did not think Tony had heard him; or if he had that he wouldn’t remember it.

“I see.”

“Never blamed you anyway. You seem to apologize for a lot of stuff that’s not really your fault, huh?” Tony laughed humorlessly and Bucky stared at him silently for several moments before speaking once again.

“He wasn’t always like this—Steve I mean.” Tony was startled by Bucky’s words and he settled back into the couch, waiting for the other man to continue. “I didn’t expect him to be the same person, y’know? It’s been an entire lifetime—we both experienced a lot of traumatic events—but I never would have thought in a million years that he’d become a jerk. I don’t know if the power went to his head or what, but his judgment…it’s not the same. He used to care about people. He was never great at following the rules, but he always did it with the best intentions before...Anyway, I can tell you care a lot about him. I’m sorry he’s treating you the way he is.” Tony looked away, clearing his throat. He sniffed as he glanced back up in Bucky’s direction, laughing softly.

“I’ve never heard you say so much before, Barnes--at least not while I was fully cognitive.” Tony said, successfully deflecting any response the other man had been expecting him to make about Steve. Eyes widening, Bucky looked at Tony as he realized just how much he had spoken in front of the man who had filled him with sheer terror only a few weeks earlier.

“I…guess you’re not as terrifying as I thought you were.” The super soldier declared, though he panicked internally the moment the words left his lips, wondering if Tony might take them the wrong way.

“You know, I get that a lot. I’m not sure if I should be flattered or if I need to work on being more intimidating.” Tony said, a smile curling up on the corner of his lips. The panic Bucky felt began to die down and he let loose a strangled laugh.

“You don’t need to do that. It’s a good thing in my book.” Tony nodded in response, and the two proceeded to sit in silence for a moment before Bucky looked back up at Tony.

“Everyone really loves you.” Tony looked up, caught off guard by Bucky’s words. “The way they were all trying to take care of you—even the way they look at you. It must be nice.” The super soldier paused for a moment as he observed how Tony’s expression had started off as one of surprise, next transforming into a look of hope before twisting into doubt.

“Oh, I don’t know about all that.”

“Hm?”

“I just mean that I’m a rich, powerful, influential person. I'm convenient to have around.”

“What does that have to do with anything?” Bucky asked, brows knit together.

“It just makes it hard to know who really cares about you, that’s all.”

“I saw everyone today, and the way that Peter looks at you—“

“Not Peter. I would never doubt Peter. I trust him with my life.” Tony said quickly.

“But the others? I saw the way you looked at Miss Pepper.” Tony licked his lips, leaning forward slightly.

“I do trust her, Pep's not in it for money or anything. It’s just that…” The man trailed off. Why was he telling Bucky any of this? “It’s nothing.”

“Afraid you’ll get hurt?” Bucky asked, wrapping his blanket more tightly around himself. Tony stared at the super soldier curiously for a few moments, wondering briefly what the man’s angle was before he shrugged in response.

“Like I said, it comes with the territory of being rich and powerful. The final straw was when someone who was like a father to me tore my heart out for his own gain—quite literally.” Tony laughed darkly, waving his hand away when Bucky’s eyebrows shot up. “It’s a long story.” Bucky wasn’t sure that Tony would even want to talk about his past, but he was definitely curious to learn more about the interesting man in front of him—besides, he had nothing better to do at three in the morning. Bucky shrugged his shoulders as he looked at Tony.

“I’ve got time.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like a lot happened in this chapter from Bucky's POV especially. Let me know your thoughts. :)


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A lot of reflection in this chapter. I hope you all enjoy it. :)

Bucky ran his fingers through his wet hair before turning around and closing his eyes, letting the steady stream of hot water cascade down the front of his body. It was late morning, and Bucky had only just returned to his room to freshen up as he had spent nearly four hours talking with Tony. The super soldier had been surprised to find that speaking with Tony was comfortable, and their conversation had only ended when Pepper called Tony to tell him about some important paperwork she wanted him to review.

_“Never realized how rough Tony had it. Always just thought he was a rich brat until I came here…he’s pretty far from that, huh? I…feel bad for him. At least the people who hurt me were my enemies…seems like almost everyone who’s hurt him has been someone he loved.”_ Bucky moved to pick up the bar of soap, building up a good lather before he began to wash his body. _“He’s a really cool guy…but that cocky behavior—that’s clearly a front. I know that I was trained for years by those Hydra bastards to notice minute details about everyone around me, but I wonder if anyone else has noticed. If you look past the act he’s actually so…”_ Bucky hummed in thought as he moved back under the water to rinse off the soap. _“Soft?”_ The man laughed softly to himself as he thought of Shuri’s teachings before he reached out to turn off the water. As soon as he stepped out of the shower and felt the cold air on his damp skin, Bucky dove for a nearby towel, hastily wrapping himself up until he was warm again. He glanced in the mirror for a brief moment before looking away, still having a hard time looking at his own reflection. As he walked out of the bathroom and toward his closet to find something to wear, his thoughts drifted back to Tony and he smiled softly.

_“Maybe someday we can be friends.”_

* * *

 

When Steve’s alarm went off at five o’clock that morning, he immediately rolled over and turned it off before burying himself deeper beneath the covers, intending to skip his morning workout for the second day in a row. His stomach was already growling, most likely due to him not eating anything the day before, but the thought of food still made his stomach a bit queasy. Since Bucky had yelled at him two nights ago, the Captain had not left his room. At first, he had wallowed in self-pity, wondering why his lifelong best friend was taking the side of Tony over him. However, the more that Steve reflected on Bucky’s words, the more ashamed he became as he realized that his friend was right—about everything. Steve should not have taken Bucky on the mission, he should not have expected Bucky to be the same person he was before spending seventy years as a brainwashed assassin, and he should not have constantly put his interests above others.

Steve truly hadn’t realized that his behavior had become deplorable. In his mind, he was the same Captain America that he had always been. However, the more he thought about it, the more his heart sank as he realized that he was hardly better than the fascist leaders he had fought so hard to bring to justice during the second world war. Ever since Steve had been pulled from the Atlantic, life had been hard. He had gone to sleep toward the end of the second world war and awoke in a world that even the most imaginative of 1940s comic books and radio programs could not have begun to depict. Everything was different; everything was new. His best friend was dead, and his best girl had lived a long life without him. He did feel lucky that Peggy was still alive when he was pulled from the ice, but it was hard for him to see the strong spitfire of a woman he loved too frail to even leave her bed for one last dance. Steve had gone through many difficult things in his past, but being one of the pallbearers at Peggy’s funeral was by far one of the hardest things he had ever done.

When Steve had found out that Bucky was still alive, he had thought of nothing but saving his friend. Nothing had mattered—only Bucky. While he would do everything all over again to save his beloved friend, he knew that if given the opportunity to go back, he would make certain to do it without hurting those around him. Steve was just glad that Peggy had not known of his actions in the recent years; she would have been so disappointed in him, and that thought hurt him just as much as Bucky’s words did. Rolling over in bed, Steve pulled his compass from the drawer in his nightstand, opening it to look at the picture of Peggy he still kept. After staring at it for several minutes, he slowly closed the compass, gripping it tightly and holding it to his heart. He needed to apologize to everyone—especially Tony.

Meeting Tony Stark had been one of the strangest things about waking up in a different century. One of the first things he had learned about the future was that his friend Howard had been dead for years, and he would be working alongside the new head of Stark Industries, Howard’s son Tony. At first, Steve had been excited to meet his friend’s son. However, upon meeting the man, Steve had been disappointed. Though he looked like his father and had the intelligence to match, Tony was hardly more than an arrogant playboy in Steve’s eyes. Howard had always done well with the ladies, but from Steve’s point of view, Howard had been far more focused on working hard to help his country than he had been on partying or having fun. Though he had grown to see Tony as a friend, Steve realized that he had never stopped comparing Tony to Howard—on a subconscious level at least. That was probably one of the biggest factors in their strained relationship—especially since he knew that Tony hadn’t been close to his father. Steve released a deep sigh as he rolled onto his back to stare at the ceiling. Bucky had been right. He wasn’t deserving of the “Captain America” title he so proudly wore. How had he strayed so far from the honorable man he had once been? Steve didn’t have an answer, but he knew that he needed one.

“Friday?”

“Yes, Captain?”

“Is Tony still doing well?”

“He is.” Steve frowned. Even Friday as being short with him.

“Is he awake?

“Yes.”

“Where is he?”

“Boss is in his lab.”

“Would you ask him if I can go down there? I need to speak with him.”

“Yes, Captain.’ Steve sat up, looking at the compass he still held until Friday spoke again.

“You are welcome in the lab, Captain.” Steve smiled a bit as he released a sigh of relief.

“Thank you, Friday. I’ll make my way down there shortly.” Steve stood up and headed to his closet, grabbing some clothes and tossing them into a bag with a few other necessities before he changed into clean clothing and put on a baseball cap. Slinging his bag over his shoulder, Steve left his room and headed for Bucky’s. He knocked several times, but upon being greeted by silence, he pulled a loose piece of paper from his sketchbook. After jotting down a quick note and sliding it under the door, he turned around and began to make his way down to Tony’s lab.

* * *

 

Tony sat on the couch in his lab, looking at the paperwork that Pepper had sent for him to review. Well, he was trying to review it; however, he found that his mind kept wandering back to the few hours he had spent speaking with Bucky.

_“It’s funny…I was worried about Bucky coming here. Turns out that I’m more comfortable around him than Steve.”_ Tony thought with a wry laugh. _“Actually, he’s nice to talk to…he listens so well. Most people cut me off or stop listening after a while, but he was so attentive…not used to that…I just kept talking—oh god—what if I shared too much?"_ Tony rubbed his face as he groaned aloud. _“Maybe I should ask him more about himself…might do more harm than good though…Then again, everyone needs someone to talk to. I guess he has Steve though…”_

Tony felt a pang in his chest as his thoughts shifted to the Captain. Did Steve really think so little of him that he hadn’t even bothered to check on him after the accident? Though he’d never admitted it to anyone, Tony had grown up idolizing Captain America. He couldn’t deny the excitement he felt when he heard that Steve had been found in the Atlantic. Tony had hoped that his idol was everything he'd imagined as a child. Though his hero worship had turned to resentment later in his life due to Howard constantly reminding Tony that he could never live up to the Captain’s reputation, no matter how hard he tried, young Tony had always secretly wished that Captain America was his dad instead of Howard. Captain America would have been proud of him. Captain America would have told him it was okay to mess up as long as he tried his best. Captain America would have hugged him if he had a nightmare. Young Tony had been sure of all those things. So, the day that Tony was scheduled to meet Steve was one of the few times that Tony had been genuinely excited about anything. Surely Steve would be proud of him; proud of what he’d accomplished. Of course, he’d had his rough years, but he had turned his life around. He had worked hard, he'd risked everything changing Stark Industries’ business model to help others instead of harming them, and he tried to be the best hero that he could be. However, Tony had been crushed to find that it wasn’t enough. Howard had been right. Captain America was disappointed in him, and it hurt Tony just as much as Howard’s disappointment had _—_ if not more. Tony sighed and shook all thoughts from his mind, trying desperately to focus on the paperwork that he needed to finish looking over. His concentration lasted for all of about two minutes when Friday interrupted him.

“I’m sorry for interrupting, Boss, but Captain Rogers would like to come down here and speak to you.” Tony’s eyebrows shot up and he nodded slowly.

“He’s welcome to come talk to me.”

“Yes, Sir.” Tony looked down at the papers, setting them on a nearby table. He definitely couldn’t concentrate knowing that Steve would be coming to speak with him. Tony ended up shifting back and forth in his seat, fidgeting somewhat nervously as he waited. Nearly fifteen minutes passed before the door to Tony’s lap opened, and Tony watched as Steve entered the room.

“Hey.” Steve said with a soft smile.

“Cap. How can I help you?”

“Tony, I’m here to apologize.” The genius quickly looked up at the super soldier before shaking his head and laughing softly, his walls of defense automatically going up around him.

“Nothing to apologize for. As you can see, I’m still in one piece.” Steve frowned as he looked over Tony’s face, dropping his bag onto a workbench before moving to sit opposite the man.

“Tony, that doesn’t matter. Besides, I know you’re still hurt. I can see the cast, and Friday told me about the concussion and contusions you sustained in the blow. I **_am_** sorry…but this isn’t just about that. It’s about everything…I know that it’s not an excuse, but my behavior…well, Bucky reminded me the other night about what it means to be a hero… and, well, I owe several people apologies, but I definitely owe you the biggest one. I haven’t been a good leader, a good teammate, or a good friend, and I hope that you can forgive me for that... I’m going to go away for a few days…I need some time to think…but I wanted to apologize to you before I left.” Tony looked at Steve in surprise, swallowing the lump in his throat as he bobbed his head up and down.

“It’s not a big deal.”

“It is, Tony. I realize it is now.” Steve said, patting the genius’ knee before he stood back up. “I’m heading out now. I’ll be back once I figure things out." The Captain looked down as he grabbed his bag from the table before looking back at the other man once more.

“Tony? I’m really glad you’re okay.”

“Thanks, Cap.” Tony said, one side of his lips curled up into a smile. And with that, Steve turned around and walked from the lab leaving Tony alone with his thoughts.

* * *

 

Tony had only been alone for about fifteen minutes when he heard the door to his lab swing open so quickly that it slammed into the wall with a bang.

“A-HA!” Peter said accusingly, blinking in surprise when he didn’t see Tony at his workbench. Tony laughed as he watched from the corner, Peter immediately turning toward the sound of the man’s laughter.

“Thought you’d catch me disobeying Bruce’s orders, hm?” Tony asked in amusement. Peter walked over with a sheepish grin and plopped down beside him.

“Yeah, but I guess you’re being good for once.” Peter teased before he tilted his head to look at the papers Tony had spread out. Upon seeing the Stark Industries letterhead at the top of the page he nodded knowingly. “Oh, Miss Potts has you busy, huh?”

“She does indeed.” Tony said, forcing a soft laugh. Peter studied him for a moment.

“You okay?”

‘Yeah, why?”

“I dunno, you seem a little off. If you’re too tired for paperwork Miss Potts will definitely understand—“

“It’s not that, Kid. I feel pretty great all things considering.” Peter nodded, looking his mentor over once more.

“You sure you’re okay?” Tony laughed.

“I’m fine. A little distracted, but fine.” When Peter gave him a questioning look, he continued. “Steve was just down here. He—“

“ ** _What did he do_ _?_** ” Peter asked, venom in his voice. Tony’s eyes widened.

“Calm down, Spiderman. He came to tell me that he is sorry.” It was Peter’s turn to look surprised.

“Captain Cocky came to apologize?”

“Peter.” Tony reprimanded, an eyebrow raised. Peter huffed as he crossed his arms.

“Sorry…I just…don’t like him anymore. He let me down. He was supposed to be this great hero, and he’s just a bully.” Tony frowned. Though he couldn’t deny that he felt the same way Peter did, he also didn’t want his overly optimistic teen to turn into a pessimist.

“He’s going through a lot too, Pete. He just left. He’s going away for a few days to think. It seems Bucky was the one able to talk some sense into him.” Tony said with a forced smile. “He just wanted to apologize before he left. Maybe that old Cap we both learned about in our history classes is still around after all.” Tony gave Peter a hopeful smile and the teen nodded silently, still unconvinced that Steve would not try to hurt Tony again. “Hey, Buddy…I’ve got a lot to do so…maybe I could be alone for a little bit?” Peter knew that Tony wanted to be alone with his thoughts—there was no way in hell that Tony would ever ask to be alone with paperwork from his company—but Peter simply nodded.

“Okay. I’ll go do something else for a while. If you want, maybe we can do something later?”

“I definitely want that.” Tony said with a smile. Peter nodded and turned to leave before spinning back around to face his mentor.

“Tony?”

“Hm?”

“You want a hug?” Tony glanced up from the papers he had been pretending to read. He looked at Peter for a moment before silently nodding his head. The boy stepped forward, hugging Tony for a long moment before slowly pulling away. “Tell Friday when you wanna hang out, okay?”

“Thanks, Buddy. I will.”

* * *

 

“Bucky?” Peter called out as he knocked at the man’s door.

“It’s open!” The teen stepped into the room to see the super soldier combing out his long, wet hair as he sat cross-legged on his bed. As he entered the room, he kicked a piece of paper on the ground, stooping down to pick it up.

“What’s this?” Bucky turned to look at him, tilting his head curiously.

“I’m not sure. What’s it say?” Peter unfolded the paper and scanned it before carrying it over to the man, dropping it in front of him as he sat down onto the bed.

“From Captain Rogers. He’s going away for a few days.”

“What? Why?” Bucky asked, dropping his brush to pick up the letter.

“Tony said that Captain Rogers is taking time to think about something you said. Something about his bad behavior. He just apologized to Tony before he left.” Bucky looked pleased but simply nodded. The two sat in a comfortable silence for a few moments before Peter pulled out his phone. “You busy?”

“Nope. You want to do something?”

“Yeah, I thought I could show you some YouTube videos. Want to watch them?” Bucky nodded quickly, realizing that he enjoyed spending time with Peter even more than he enjoyed spending time alone. The teen grinned and moved to lean back against the headboard, waiting for Bucky to join him. Once the two were comfortable, Peter began to show Bucky all kinds of different trendy videos—everything from vlogs to mukbangs to ASMR. However, he quickly noticed that Bucky seemed to enjoy room tours the most. Peter pulled up another tour, and Bucky watched the screen in fascination, while the teen watched him in amusement.

“There are so many things I’ve never seen in all these rooms. And people have Christmas lights hung all year long? Wow, that pillow looks so soft…wish I could feel it. Hey, what’s that thing?” Bucky was a constant stream of questions that Peter was more than happy to answer. As he watched more YouTube videos with Bucky, an idea began to form in Peter’s mind, and he grinned to himself. Peter couldn’t wait to text Shuri regarding his idea—the two of them had a lot of work to do.


	22. Chapter 22

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter already? YEP. The last chapter was one of those "boring but necessary" ones, so I was itching to write more. Be forewarned that this chapter does get dark, and there are mentions of suicidal thoughts. That being said, it ends on a slightly lighter note. Hope you all enjoy it!

Bucky’s eyes flew open as he released a strangled gasp. After a moment, he closed his eyes again to take a few steadying breaths, though he didn’t keep them closed long—a morbid memory still so vivid in his mind that he could almost smell the blood on his hands. Bucky sat up quickly, turning on the small lamp beside his bed before looking around his dull room which did little to provide him with comfort. He glanced at the clock on his nightstand, noting that it was just after two o’clock in the morning.

 _“Well, I got almost three hours tonight.”_ He thought to himself as he kicked off the covers, feet sliding into his slippers as he stood up. He ran a hand through his tangled hair as he shuffled out of his room and towards the elevator.

“Miss Friday, lounge please.” Bucky mumbled as he stepped into the lift.

“Of course, Sergeant.” The man rubbed his tired eyes as he leaned against the wall of the elevator.

 _“Wonder if Tony will be up tonight…sure would be nice to have someone to talk to…”_ However, as the doors opened onto a completely darkened lounge, Bucky sighed in disappointment _. “Upset that someone else isn’t awake because of a nightmare? That’s great, Buck. Real stand-up guy you are.”_ He mentally chastised himself as he headed to the kitchen to start a pot of coffee. The man stood by the counter as the coffee brewed before pouring himself a big mug and moving out to the living area to sit on one of the couches. He sipped the hot liquid slowly, trying to focus on anything and everything that would keep his thoughts from spiraling out of control. After drinking nearly half his mug, Bucky set it down on one of the side tables and curled into the couch, wondering again when he would be able to get his back pay.

 _“Really wish I had one of those little phones right now. I wanna see more of those YouTube films people make in their house. Gosh…the future sure is something.”_ Bucky’s thoughts were interrupted by the sound of quickly approaching footsteps, and before he could even straighten up and turn around, he saw Tony come into view. The man’s back was to him, and Bucky watched as he peered into the kitchen.

“Tony?” The billionaire jumped before whirling around, hand on his chest beside his arc reactor.

“You need to wear a bell!” The man exclaimed as his right hand moved to squeeze his left arm. Bucky offered an apologetic look.

“Sorry.” After Tony took a deep breath, he forced a laugh.

“It’s fine. Everyone else around here is so damn loud you hear them for miles. Just not used to someone so quiet.” Bucky nodded, biting his bottom lip as he still felt bad for scaring the other man.

“I…made coffee. Should still be hot.” He said with a nod to the kitchen.

“Exactly what I was hoping for.” Tony said before disappearing into the other room. When he returned a moment later, he sat down on the couch opposite Bucky, crossing his legs as he moved the mug to his lips. As Bucky watched the genius drink his coffee, he tried to think of something—anything—to say, but for some reason, he felt nervous again. Without realizing it, he began blinking rapidly. Tony glanced over at him before moving the mug away from his lips. “Your turn.”

“Huh?” Bucky asked, looking up at Tony in bewilderment.

“Last night I gave you the condensed version of my life. Now it’s your turn to tell me yours.”

“Oh, you don’t want to hear that…”

“Wouldn’t be asking if I wasn’t interested.” Bucky mulled over Tony’s words for a moment before shrugging.

“Grew up in a nice family in Brooklyn. Hardworking parents and two younger sisters. I helped raise my younger sisters wherever I could. I liked school a lot. Didn’t always get to go when I got a little older though. Sometimes had to skip to do some extra work if money was tight. Couldn’t let my sisters starve. Y’know, if Steve found out I was skipping classes, he’d skip too. Help me work hard all day for a few pennies and then he’d give ‘em all to me. Told me it was to keep me in school longer.” Bucky said with a fond smile as he stared off into the distance. “The Depression was hard on my family—we could have had it a lot worse though. You wouldn’t believe some of the pitiful stuff I saw back then. Uh…anyway, I used to really enjoy boxing. Was pretty good at it. Helped Steve out of a lot of jams. Runt was always gettin’ himself in trouble.” To Tony’s amusement, he noticed that the longer Bucky reminisced, the thicker his old-fashioned Brooklyn accent became. “Then I got drafted and well, uh, from what I hear, all that stuff is in the history books.”

“That’s it? I talk for hours about my life and you give me two minutes?” Bucky shrugged.

“I might be a lot older than you, but I’ve hardly lived.” Tony frowned at the man’s response.

“All right, well why don’t you tell me what happened after you got drafted. History isn’t always recorded accurately.” Bucky once again considered Tony’s words before nodding.

“Was part of the 107th over in Europe…war is…war. Not so much to say about that. At some point, my outfit and I were taken by Hydra after we attacked a group of Nazis. We were taken to the Austrian Alps and forced to help make weapons for ‘em. Later on, there was this Colonel…uh…Lohmer, I think. He never liked me. Dunno why, but he really hated me more than the other prisoners. Gave me a good lickin’ one day…Think he said I was working too slowly. Anyway, he beat me up pretty bad. Eventually, I couldn’t even stand up straight. Some of the guards took me to this empty room and told me to lie down on this cot. They strapped me down, but I didn’t even care. I was finally going to rest. Boy was I wrong. That was when I met Zola. He did all sorts of stuff…not fun. I—I don’t know how long I was there.” Bucky said, feeling frustrated as some of the details seemed a bit fuzzy. “Anyway, next thing I know, Steve comes to save me… and you know, the last time I saw him he was this tiny little kid, suddenly he’s half a foot taller than me! Then the red skull came out and revealed his true identity to us—could’ve gone my whole life without seeing that gruesome face.” He grumbled, causing Tony to chuckle. When he heard the laughter, Bucky looked up and smiled, feeling slightly more confident in telling his story. “We hardly made it out alive, but somehow we did, and Steve led us back to the camp he had come from. After that, Steve, some of the other guys, and I formed the Howling Commandos. Took down a lot of Hydra bases. We really interfered with their plans.” He said, a cocky smile curling upon his lips. “On my last mission, Steve and I got on a train carrying Zola. We wanted to interrogate him to learn about the Red Skull’s plans…I ended up falling off the train. Next thing I remember, I’m strapped to this cold metal chair…my arm was gone…they played mind games with me… experimented on me…they…they—”

“I don’t need to hear any more.” Tony interrupted quickly. Bucky nodded gratefully as he pulled a throw pillow into his arms and hugged it to his chest. The two sat in silence for several minutes, Tony waiting patiently until Bucky was ready to speak again. Finally, the super soldier glanced back at Tony, his long hair partially hiding his face.

“Like I said, I might be over twice your age, but you’ve lived much more of a life than I have.”

“Well, that doesn’t seem to be the case to me. Even if you see it that way, I figure you have, what? Fifteen, twenty years to catch up to me?”

“What do you mean?”

“You were born a hundred years ago, but physically your body is about thirty, right? I’m forty-seven. So, I figure you still have plenty of time before you have to start worrying about not having lived enough.” Bucky blinked a few times before he started to laugh. Tony furrowed his brow in confusion. “Did I say something funny?”

“No…I—sorry. That’s just the most supportive thing anyone over the age of eighteen has said to me since…I don’t know, the forties? …Thanks.”

“What about Steve?” Tony blurted out before he was able to stop himself; he was sleep-deprived, after all.

“He…tried. Just didn’t understand that I wasn’t going to be the same as I was during the war….things are different now. But he’s working on it, right? I know things can’t have been easy for him either. This world is a lot different than the one we grew up in.” Tony just nodded his head in silent acknowledgment as he finished the last of his coffee.

* * *

 

The next night, Tony woke up just after one-thirty in the morning.

 _“These damn dreams keep happening earlier and earlier. All I’m asking for is a solid four hours of sleep. Is that really so much to ask? A measly four hours?”_ Tony thought angrily as he tore out of bed, blanket wrapped around his shoulders. He headed into the elevator, about to ask Friday to take him to his lab when he hesitated; ultimately asking her to take him to the lounge instead.

The middle of the night was always the hardest time for Tony. During the day, the others were loud, but he liked it that way. He liked being around everyone in the tower. Nighttime was always too quiet for him. Tony usually tried to distract himself with work to forget his loneliness. Sometimes being around his bots while verbally sparring with Friday was enough—lately it hadn’t been. Night after night, he had been tempted to crawl into bed with Peter and fall back asleep, but he couldn’t do that. He was the adult. He needed to be strong for Peter; not the other way around. Though he hated the bleak hours from midnight until dawn, his recent late-night meetings with Bucky had actually given him something to look forward to when a bad dream inevitably woke him up. Tony had found that not only did he enjoy the super soldier’s company, but that it was easy for him to relax around Bucky as well. The former assassin had been through a lifetime of pain that had messed with his mind in a plethora of ways. Because of this, Tony felt that they had somewhat of a mutual understanding. The two men weren’t completely comfortable with one another, but they also didn’t have to hide their feelings as much as they did around the others in the tower. Tony and Bucky could use one another to help banish the terrifying thoughts and memories that seemed to intensify in the darkness, and for Tony, that was more than enough.

As the doors opened onto a darkened lounge, Tony frowned as he stepped out onto the floor, asking Friday to raise the lights. He glanced at the couches before heading into the kitchen, preparing himself to see the stealthy super soldier, but Bucky was nowhere in sight. Tony leaned against the counter dejectedly before glancing up at the time on the nearby microwave.

 _“It is still early. Not quite two…maybe he’ll be down later. I’ll make some coffee.”_ He thought to himself as he grabbed the grounds from the cabinet. After brewing a large pot of coffee, Tony poured himself a cup, sitting at the table as he slowly sipped the hot beverage. Tony nursed his drink for nearly twenty minutes before he finished the last of it, immediately moving to pour himself a second cup.

 _“Guess I’ll move to the couches. It’ll be more comfortable out there.”_ Tony decided as he trudged towards the sofas in the other room, his blanket cape floating behind him. After curling up on the couch, he stared down at the dark, bitter liquid in the mug he held. _“Maybe it’s just going to be me tonight. Lucky Barnes.”_ After about fifteen more minutes of sitting in silence, Tony set his coffee down on the table in front of him, leaning back into the comfort of the couch as he allowed his eyes to fall shut. _“Maybe I should go down to my lab… it is pretty comfortable here though. I could watch TV for a while first.”_ Tony thought to himself, though he unwittingly fell back asleep before he was able to make up his mind.

* * *

 

Bucky had been awake for nearly twenty minutes, but the tears continued to flow silently down his cheeks as he cradled himself. He was plagued nightly by memories of the torture he had endured or the pain he had once inflicted upon others. However, the flashback his subconscious had decided to torture him with that night was one that upset him more than anything else he had been forced to do during his time as the Winter Soldier. It was the memory of the time that he had killed an innocent, three-year-old girl whose father, an influential political figure in Europe, had refused to cooperate with Hydra. Bucky began to sob as he remembered the bright smile on the child’s face that had quickly been replaced by a look of sheer terror when he used his metal arm to pick her up by the neck and choke the life out of her.

 _“I didn’t want to do that…I—I…she was just a baby…Why did they make me do that? Why did they make me do any of it?”_ He wondered as he buried his face into a pillow. The more he thought about what Hydra had made him do, the angrier he became. He suddenly sat up, his metal fist rearing back as he punched the wall beside his headboard as hard as he could, a frustrated growl leaving his snarled lips. He sat still for several moments before slowly pulling his fist from the large hole it had created in the wall, using his right hand to brush dust off of his metal one. He swallowed the lump in his throat before releasing a shaky breath as he struggled internally with himself.

 _“I’m a monster…but I wish I weren’t. I didn’t want to do those things. I wish I hadn’t done them. I would give anything to go back. If only I hadn’t survived that fall. If only I had killed myself when I had the chance…or at least been strong enough not to succumb to their brainwashing…None of this would have happened if I weren’t so weak. That poor child… the Starks… everyone else that I hurt or killed…they didn’t deserve it.”_ He aggressively wiped the tears from his cheeks as he sniffled. The thoughts of suicide began to re-emerge from the shadows of his mind, and a shiver ran up his spine as he thought once again about how easy it would be for him to free himself from the lifetime of suffering that he endured. As various scenarios of how to end his life played out in his mind, Bucky’s eyes fell on the photo that he kept on his bedside table—the selfie that he had taken with Shuri on his last night in Wakanda. He stared at the picture for several minutes, recalling how the Wakandan princess had cared for him as she worked tirelessly to remove Hydra’s programming from his mind. She had met him as both Bucky, and as the soldier. She knew that the Soldier was a cold-hearted assassin who cared about nothing aside from following orders. She also knew what Bucky was: a man so weak that he had allowed himself to become a puppet for the evilest organization in existence. And yet, Shuri had never been scared of him. In fact, she loved him. She believed in him. He looked down at the Vibranium arm that Shuri had made for him. This arm wasn’t the one that had broken necks or steadied a gun. This arm had only been used to feed the goats he used to sit with in Wakanda or to pat someone on the back as he gave them a hug. Not a single time had this arm ever hurt anyone. He made a fist with his Vibranium hand before releasing it and looking back up at the picture of Shuri. He had to try living a little bit longer. For Shuri. For all the hard work that she had put into his recovery. Every day was a struggle—nights were even worse—but he could endure it a while longer. He had known nothing but pain and guilt for over half a century. The option of suicide would never go away. It would always be waiting for him, but he owed it to Shuri to try a little bit longer.

Bucky wiped his still-damp eyes before wrapping himself in a soft blanket, taking a deep breath as he stared at the wall, wishing to feel nothing. The man craved the numbness that usually followed the realization that he could end all of the pain whenever he wished. However, it did not come. He furrowed his brow in confusion, shaking his head slowly from side to side. After several minutes of progressively feeling more agitated, he hopped up, deciding that he needed to get out of his bedroom before he ended up doing something that he was determined not to resort to for a while longer.

He glanced at the clock, noting that it was just after four-thirty in the morning. Was Tony in the lounge? Though Bucky would have loved nothing more than the other man’s company to distract himself from his dark thoughts, he began to wonder if he even deserved it. _“Tony’s probably just been nice the past few nights. Seems like the type of guy he is, but I doubt he wants me bothering him after he has a bad night... I know he didn’t want me here. I don’t blame him. I am the one who took his parents from him…I don’t deserve his company, and I’m sure as hell he doesn’t want mine.”_ With a determined nod of his head, Bucky decided to stay in the living area on Steve’s floor.

He stood up and wandered through the living room, past an armchair to the small kitchen on Steve’s floor. He filled the coffee machine with water before he began rifling through the cupboards. Bucky growled in irritation as he realized that there was no coffee anywhere in the kitchen. After a moment of hesitation, he decided to go make coffee in the lounge like he normally did; if he ran into Tony, he would just greet the man and leave as quickly as possible so as not to disturb him.

He headed straight to the elevator, asking Friday to take him to the lounge. She did as requested, and when the door opened a few moments later, Bucky stepped out into the well-lit lounge. As he walked towards the kitchen, he noticed Tony fast asleep on one of the couches. He immediately lightened his tread so as not to wake the sleeping man while he crept into the kitchen. He was pleasantly surprised to find half a pot of hot coffee waiting for him. After pouring himself a cupful and taking a sip, his nose crinkled slightly as he realized the coffee was stale.

 _“Wonder when he made this?”_ Bucky thought to himself as he sat down at the table, too unbothered to brew a fresh pot. He sipped his drink, secretly glad that Tony was asleep; he hadn’t wanted to go back to Steve’s floor alone. Bucky sat in silence for around twenty minutes before he heard the doors to the elevator open and soft footsteps approaching. He glanced at the clock curiously, noting that it was just after five. Who else would be awake so early? A tired-looking Peter rubbed his eyes as he sleepily stumbled into the room wearing his Spiderman suit, his mask in hand.

“Oh, G’morning! You’re up early too?” Peter asked as he noticed Bucky in the kitchen. The man nodded and held a finger to his lips before gesturing in the direction of the living room.

“Tony’s sleeping.” He said in a low voice. Peter’s eyes widened and he turned around, leaning to peek out into the adjoining room.

“How long has he been down here?”

“Dunno. I just came down a bit ago.” Peter frowned.

“Why is he out there?” Bucky was unsure if Peter was aware of the man’s nightmares so he shrugged slightly. “If he has a bad…“ Peter hesitated as he glanced at Bucky, “…time sleeping, he always goes to his lab. He never comes down here.”

“Didn’t Bruce tell Tony not to work down there? That must be why.”

“No, he has a couch down there too. I found him there yesterday.” Peter bit his lip. “Maybe…it was just cold down there.” Peter reasoned. Bucky looked down at his mug before looking back at the pot on the counter. It contained too much coffee for one man to drink alone—even Tony. Had Tony been waiting for him? He looked back down at the table, wondering if the other man found as much comfort in their late night conversations as he did. The heaviness in his heart lightened ever so slightly at the thought.

“I’m sure that’s what it was.” Bucky agreed, seeing that Peter was worried. “Why are you up so early? You normally sleep much later than this.”

“Hm? Oh…yeah. Well, Ned’s coming over later this morning. I want to get in a morning patrol before we hang out.” He said with a smile on his face as he went over to the pantry and grabbed a pack of strawberry pop tarts. He whirled around to head out, but when he took a good look at Bucky’s face, his smile disappeared as he noticed how red the man’s eyes were. Bucky tilted his head curiously, his eyes widening when the boy suddenly moved up behind his chair and leaned to wrap his arms around Bucky’s shoulders.

“Did you have a hard night too?” Bucky felt himself tear up at the question, and he quickly closed his eyes.

“I’ll be okay.”

“Just like Tony.” Peter said with a sigh as he shook his head.

“What do you mean?”

“Always pretending you’re fine when you’re not. I don’t know what they taught back in the 40s, but in case no one updated you, it’s okay for boys to cry now.” Bucky laughed softly at that comment and patted Peter’s arm.

“Thanks, Kid. I’ll keep that in mind.” Peter pulled away, looking down at his friend.

“Will you be okay? I can stay here with you instead.”

“Nope.” Bucky said as he shook his head. “Go save New York, Spiderman.”

“All right.” Peter said with a smile. “Hey…maybe if you’re not busy, you can hang out with Ned and me this afternoon?”

“I’d like that.” Bucky said, his smile more genuine than it had been before.

“Cool. See ya later then.” Peter said as he ripped open his pop tarts, taking a large bite as he exited the kitchen. Bucky looked down at his Vibranium arm. Maybe he had a few reasons to keep living after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My favorite part of this entire chapter was when Bucky realized that Tony had been waiting in the lounge because he wanted to talk with him. ;A;


	23. Chapter 23

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The friendship blossoms :)

“Loki, for the last time—I’m fine. Sit down or I’ll kick you out.” Tony said as he picked up a wrench. The Asgardian rolled his eyes before sitting on a nearby stool.

“I am merely trying to ensure that you do not harm yourself further.”

“I’m not made of glass! Why don’t you ever bother Thor this much?”

“He doesn’t need it.” Loki said with a wave of his hand.

“How can you be so sure?” Upon hearing Tony’s question, the god picked up a nearby utility knife, pointing it at Tony as he smirked and raised an eyebrow.

“What would you do if I stabbed you right now?”

“What the hell is wrong with you? Put that down!” Loki smiled sinisterly for a moment before dropping the knife and laughing softly.

“That’s how I’m sure, Anthony.” Tony looked at the god in confusion, prompting Loki to explain further. “Thor was very annoying to grow up with. He was the apple of our father’s eye. He was also extremely loud and boorish. When we were children, I occasionally stabbed him. It would shut him up for an hour or two.”

“You **_what_**?”

“The first time was when we were eight years old. Thor would not stop pestering me while I was trying to read. Our mother had just taught me how to transform myself into small animals. Thor loves snakes, so naturally, I turned myself into a snake. When he picked me up, I turned back into myself and stabbed him.” Loki reminisced with a fond chuckle while Tony looked at him as if he were insane. “In case you were wondering, I did get to finish my book without further interruptions that day.”

“That was actually **_the_** furthest question from my mind. Let me ask you this again: what the hell is wrong with you?”

“That is precisely the point I was trying to make. A light stabbing was the equivalent of what you humans would call a… ‘knuckle sandwich’?”

“Outdated terminology, but I understand what you're trying to say.” Tony said, laughing in amusement as he wondered where Loki picked up that phrase. “Still, I can’t believe you used to stab Thor on a regular basis. Why does he adore you so much?”

“Please. He hardly adores me.” Loki denied, trying not to appear flustered. Tony just laughed as he turned back to his work.

“Yeah, you keep telling yourself that, Elsa.” The two men fell into a comfortable banter as Loki watched Tony work on a new project. They had been in the lab for nearly an hour when Peter walked in, biting his bottom lip. He looked surprised to see Loki, but didn’t say anything about it as he walked straight up to his mentor.

“Hi, Tony.” Tony glanced up as he heard Peter’s softer-than-usual voice.

“Hi, Peter.” The teen fidgeted nervously and Tony just stared at him. “Can I help you?”

“Um...not me exactly, but Bucky could use some help.”

“Oh?”

“Can I bring him and Ned in here?”

“Why?”

“Bucky can’t move his arm.”

“Uh, Pete…not sure how much help I would be. Why don’t you take him to Bruce?”

“His metal arm.” Tony raised an eyebrow.

“The Vibranium arm that Shuri made just suddenly stopped working?” Tony asked skeptically. Peter nodded while avoiding eye contact with him. The genius glanced to the side, making eye contact with Loki, who also appeared suspicious of Peter.

“Fine, bring them in.” The boy turned and ran to open the door, gesturing for the others to join him in the lab. Bucky walked in looking just as nervous as Peter did. Ned, however, looked around the room with a big grin plastered onto his face.

“Awesome.” He said as Peter elbowed his side. “Ow!” Tony rolled his eyes, hooking his foot around a nearby stool and dragging it closer to himself as he gestured for the man to sit down.

“All right, Bucky. What happened?” He asked as the super soldier sat on the stool beside him, holding out his metal hand that seemed to be stuck in the shape of a claw. Bucky glanced at Peter before looking down at his hand. “It kind of froze up. Can only move the shoulder.”

“Oh yeah? What were you doing to cause it to freeze up?” Tony asked. Bucky stared down at his arm, looking like a guilty puppy.

“Sergeant, I do believe Anthony asked you a question,” Loki prompted the man. Bucky glanced in the direction of the teenagers before looking back up at Tony.

“Makin’ slime…”

“Bucky!” Peter and Ned exclaimed in unison, looking betrayed. Bucky ducked his head as he looked at the boys apologetically.

“Sorry…I can’t lie to Tony.” He hissed through his teeth as if the two other men in the room could not hear him. Tony bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing before he turned to raise an eyebrow in the direction of the teenage boys who grinned nervously at him.

“Let me take a look.” Tony said as he shook his head, grabbing hold of Bucky’s metal arm and inspecting it carefully. He rubbed at the hand gently, a bit of residue coming off the palm. He inspected his slightly sticky fingertips, squinting curiously at the substance before looking back at Bucky, knowing he’d get a straight answer from the man. “What kind of slime were you making?”

“Magnetic slime.” Tony rolled his eyes.

“Seriously?” He asked as he glanced at the two teenagers who stared at him with owl-like eyes.

“I’m sorry.” Bucky said softly. Tony glanced at him briefly.

“I'm not sure how much you studied about magnetism, and I’m guessing slime wasn’t a big thing in your day either. You get a pass—this time. But you two.” Tony said as he returned his gaze to the teenagers. “You should definitely have known better than to let him stick his metal arm into a sticky substance filled with iron filings! How much slime did you make anyway? It's all over his arm!” The boys looked at their feet for a moment before Peter peeked back up at Tony.

“A lot...we were gonna make this really cool video that...uh...anyway, Bucky was going to help us mix the slime real fast since his metal arm is so strong and..." Peter sighed as he shook his head, "we weren't thinking. He could still move his arm and hand a little bit. We tried to use a magnet to get the slime out of the openings, and that’s when his arm locked up.” Tony nodded as he listened, frowning in thought.

“That doesn’t surprise me. Vibranium has a lot of properties that aren’t very characteristic of the metals we’re most familiar with. I imagine the iron filings didn’t stick to the magnet very well?”

“Yeah…how’d you know?” Ned asked curiously.

“Because there is still slime all over his hand.” Tony said as if the answer were obvious. “I imagine the Vibranium is somehow interfering with the way the iron filings would typically react to a magnet. Whatever magnet you threw into the mix clearly caused some type of disturbance. If the damage isn’t too bad, I think just removing all the filings should do the trick. It’ll just take a while.” He said as he moved Bucky’s left arm to rest on his workbench, carefully inspecting it before he started to work on it, wanting to make sure that he did not do anything to cause further damage to the arm. Peter walked over, standing beside Tony.

“I’m really sorry. Do you want help?” Peter asked as he looks down at Tony’s casted wrist.

“I’ll be fine, Kid.” Peter nodded slowly.

“I’m sorry. Are you mad?” Tony looked up into the teenager’s worried brown eyes and smiled softly.

“I’m not mad, Buddy. But, I’m not really the one who needs an apology, am I?” Peter looked relieved that Tony wasn’t upset with him before he turned back to the super soldier.

“I’m really sorry, Bucky. We weren’t thinking.”

“Yeah,” Ned chimed in, “we’ll find a way to make it up to you.”

“We totally will.” Peter agreed. Bucky looked up at the boys a small smile on his face.

“It’s all right. It was fun anyway.” Peter nodded, hovering over Tony as the man began to carefully remove some of the small metal panels from Bucky’s arm. Tony glanced up at the boy before looking back to Loki. The quick-witted god needed no other prompting before he stood up and headed toward the door.

“Come along, Boys. I’m sure things will go much faster if we’re not in the way. I am very curious about this ‘slime’. Care to show me what it is?”

“Sure!” Ned and Peter said at the same time, explaining the appeal of the sticky substance to Loki as the three of them exited Tony’s lab. The genius continued moving small metal panels, carefully cleaning each one to ensure that nothing remained on them. Bucky watched the man curiously, finally breaking the silence quite a while later.

“Where’d you learn all this stuff?” Tony laughed, not looking up from his work.

“Did you forget whose son I am?”

“Oh. Right.” Bucky was silent for several moments before he spoke again.

“Did Howard make you learn all of this, or is it in the blood?”

“Both, I guess.” Tony said after a brief pause to consider the question. “Were you close with Howard like Cap was?”

“We were friendly, but I wasn’t as close, no.” Bucky said, his eyebrows knitting together in thought. “Hope I’m not overstepping…but you call your dad by name?” Tony stopped what he was doing, hesitating before he glanced up at the super soldier.

“I wasn’t as close to him as Steve was either.” He finally said before he returned to disassembling the man’s arm. Bucky frowned but did not ask any further questions for fear of upsetting Tony. The men were quiet for a while, Tony focusing on his work as Bucky looked on with interest. All of the panels had been cleaned and were neatly lying on Tony’s workbench, leaving the mechanical insides of Bucky’s lower arm and hand exposed. “Can you try to move your hand for me?” Bucky nodded, pausing for several moments before he frowned and shook his head.

“I’m trying…nothing’s happening.”

“Hmm…” Tony hummed thoughtfully as he leaned in closer, using a small tool to gently move the wires so that he could look beneath them. “By some miracle, the slime hardly got past the outer plates. I don’t see a trace of iron filings or gunk anywhere. Everything looks fine. I don’t know why your hand isn’t moving…” Tony said in bewilderment, leaning his head on his hand as he continued to stare down at Bucky’s arm for several more minutes, occasionally poking it as he thought. Finally, he sat back in frustration. ”I’m not very familiar with Vibranium. I might have to call Princess Shuri and…” He trailed off before glancing back up at Bucky. “The boys tried to get the slime off your arm with magnets?” Bucky nodded in response. “Don’t move. I’ll be right back.” Tony said before hopping off of his stool and disappearing out the door.

Once Bucky was alone in the lab, he began to take a good look at his surroundings for the first time since entering the room. Though arranged very differently than Hydra’s lab had been, Bucky’s mind only seemed to notice the similarities between the two laboratories: the air felt frigid, harsh lights reflected off of sterile metal surfaces, and the faint odor of chemicals—that could be used to inflict pain upon him should he misbehave—was detectable. All at once, Bucky gasped, struggling to take a breath that seemed to be caught in his throat. He looked around wildly, trying to reassure himself that he was safe, though no part of him seemed to be listening. Bucky moved his hand to his thigh, gripping the sweatpants that he was wearing. He rolled the soft material between his fingertips as he struggled to take another breath. Blinking back the tears that had begun to form in his eyes, Bucky scanned the room again before he noticed the old couch half-hidden in a corner on the far end of Tony’s lab. He started to stand, wanting desperately to curl into some form of comfort, before he looked down at his Vibranium arm which was currently in a plethora of pieces. Tony had told him not to move, and Bucky was determined to listen to the man this time. Trembling, he sat back on the stool as he blinked away several more tears, trying to keep his eyes focused on his arm so as not to see various tools that reminded him of the horrors he had endured at the hands of Hydra. Usually, Bucky was able to calm himself down fairly quickly. However, the longer he stayed in the cold room all alone, the more frightened he became. He choked back a sob as he twisted the material of his pants in his grasp again, breathing so quickly that he became close to hyperventilating. Other senses completely overwhelmed, the super soldier did not hear Tony come back into the lab. Suddenly, Bucky felt someone touch his shoulder. Startled, he lurched forward in surprise, accidentally swiping most of the small metal panels off of Tony’s workbench as he tried to use his malfunctioning arm to catch himself. His attempt was in vain, and he crashed onto the ground—now fully hyperventilating.

“Barnes, calm down.” Bucky’s head snapped up to see Tony standing above him. Confident the man was furious with him, he nodded quickly, eyes large as he watched Tony set something onto a nearby workbench before kneeling down beside him. “You’re hyperventilating. Slow down your breathing.” That sounded easy enough. However, the moment he tried to breathe more slowly, Bucky felt as if he were choking once again. As he gasped for air, Tony moved to sit next to Bucky, grabbing the man’s hand and placing it onto his chest near the arc reactor. “Match my breathing. Got it?” Bucky nodded quickly, frightened of disobeying the order. He did his best to match Tony’s breaths, and after several moments, he felt himself slowly begin to breathe at a steadier pace. When he began to calm down and think more clearly, Bucky realized that Tony was not angry with him. The man seemed more concerned than anything else, and Tony's warm hand pressing Bucky’s hand against his chest—a gentle touch—was something that Bucky had never before felt while in a laboratory.

“You okay?” Tony asked a few minutes later. When Bucky nodded, Tony released his hand. The super soldier wanted to protest; he craved human contact. Instead, Bucky pulled his hand back to his side, bowing his head slightly as he looked at the mess he had caused.

“I’m sorry.”

“Please tell me that you’re not apologizing to me for having a panic attack.” Bucky glanced up at Tony through the hair that had fallen in front of his eyes.

“What’s a panic attack?” The former assassin asked softly. Tony raised an eyebrow, questioning everything he had ever heard about the man’s intelligence until it occurred to him that Bucky probably really _**did not**_ know what a panic attack was. It was only in recent decades that mental health had begun to gain widespread recognition; the term “panic attack” hadn’t even been coined until nearly a decade after the super soldier had been taken by Hydra.

_“No wonder he looks so scared. If people saw him have a few panic attacks in the 40s, there’s a fair chance they would have strapped him into a straightjacket and thrown him into one of those creepy, old asylums that could have been the set for a horror film.”_ Tony thought, softening at the realization. He reached out, lightly setting his hand on Bucky’s shoulder; human contact always helped to ground him. Based on the way the super soldier leaned into Tony’s touch, it seemed to help Bucky as well.

“Basically, it’s when something triggers fear in you. No matter how irrational it may be, it’s real and it’s scary. It might become difficult to breathe. Your heart feels like it’s beating a mile a minute. Nothing feels real—almost like you’re stuck in a bad dream. Sound about right?” Bucky nodded in response as he looked down at his broken metal arm.

“Am I crazy?” Tony laughed and Bucky wondered briefly if the man was going to make fun of him.

“If you are, then so am I.”

“You get them too?”

“Yep…what triggered it?” Bucky shrugged. He glanced up at Tony, biting his bottom lip for a few moments before releasing it with a dejected sigh.

“It reminds me of the lab where they…worked on me. Guess I didn’t really notice until I was alone.” Tony stared at the other man in silence for a second before clapping him on the shoulder.

“C’mon, let’s get out of here. I can work on your arm in the lounge.”

“…Could you work on it on Steve’s floor instead?” Bucky asked, not wanting to see anyone else feeling the way that he did. Normally, he would be too nervous to ask someone—especially Tony—for what he wanted. However, he was beginning to see the younger man as his friend. After all, Tony had seen him in several vulnerable moments since his arrival at the tower, and he had never been anything but understanding—even more so than Steve had been.

“Sure can.” Tony stood up, walking across the room to grab a box before he returned, kneeling down beside the super soldier to pick up the small metal pieces that had been strewn across the floor. Bucky scrambled to help Tony the best that he could with one good arm, moving to get to his feet once they had finished putting everything into the box. Tony threw a few other things into it before nodding his head in the direction of the elevator.

“Lead the way.” Bucky walked into the elevator, Tony following him, and the two rode in silence to Steve’s floor. The doors opened moments later, and Bucky stepped out, leading Tony into the sitting area.

“Think you can fix my arm?”

“I’m not sure. I honestly only have one idea. It’s so stupidly simple that it just might work. If it doesn’t, I’ll have to try to get a hold of Shuri tonight. Vibranium is a bit out of my expertise.” Tony said with a chuckle. Bucky just hummed thoughtfully in response as he looked around.

“Where should I sit?”

“Uhh… how about the end of that couch? You can rest your arm on the side table so that I can work on it.”

“Okay.” The super soldier said, moving to sit in the spot that Tony had suggested. He propped his arm onto the small table while Tony dragged a nearby ottoman up beside the couch, sitting on it as he looked at Bucky’s arm once again.

“Whatcha gonna do to it?” Tony glanced up at the other man before bending over to grab the box of tools he had put on the ground.

“Well, I talked to the boys. Of course, they didn’t use small magnets like normal kids play with. Pete grabbed a pretty powerful magnet from my lab. This is what they used to try to get the slime off your arm, right?” Tony asked as he held up a rather large magnet. When Bucky nodded in response, Tony continued his explanation. “My guess is that the magnet is too strong; I think that the longer they rubbed it over your arm, the more it messed with the natural charge of the Vibranium. In short, I’m guessing that your arm is locked up because what the boys did essentially turned this non-ferrous metal into a magnet.”

“How can you fix that?”

“Well, **_if_** that is the problem, all I should have to do is run a magnet of the opposite charge along your arm. It seems too simple, but I can’t find anything else wrong with your arm. With my limited knowledge on the properties of Vibranium, it seems plausible that this might actually work. Worth a shot anyway. All right, I want you to keep trying to move your arm. Don’t stop.” Tony instructed, picking up another large magnet which looked similar to the one that the boys had used on Bucky’s arm earlier that day. He held it over the Vibranium, slowly moving it back and forth above the exposed mechanisms inside Bucky’s arm.

“I’m trying.”

“Good, keep going. Let’s give it a bit of time.” The men sat in silence, their eyes both focused on Bucky’s arm. Several minutes passed before Tony sighed in frustration. He was just about to give up on his idea when he heard a soft click and saw one of the Vibranium fingers move ever so slightly. Tony and Bucky looked back up at each other in excited surprise before the genius looked back down, moving the strong magnet over the super soldier’s arm with a new fervor. A moment later another finger twitched, then another, and within a few minutes, full range of motion had been restored to Bucky’s arm.

“I honestly can’t believe that worked. Well, at least the princess doesn’t have to find out. I don’t think she’d ever let Peter live it down.” Tony said with a smirk. Both men shared a laugh at Peter's expense before Tony grabbed his tools and a handful of small metal parts that belonged to Bucky’s arm. The super soldier watched as Tony began to quickly reassemble his arm.

“Thanks.”

“This is child’s play.” Tony said with a shrug.

“For earlier too.” The genius’ fingers stilled and Tony glanced up at Bucky before his eyes dropped back to the man's arm.

“Panic attacks are hard enough to deal with on your own. Even worse when it happens in front of someone else and you don’t know how they’ll react.” Bucky nodded in solemn agreement before giving Tony a curious look.

“When did yours start?”

“I’ve had them forever.” Tony said casually, not looking up from his work.

“Even as a child?” Bucky asked in surprise.

“Yep. Of course, it was about different stuff back then.” He said with a soft chuckle which caused Bucky to wonder how the other man could be so flippant about it.

“What’s funny about that?”

“Well…I don’t know.” The genius admitted after a brief pause. Neither of them said anything else after that, Tony working quietly as Bucky continued to watch him. About fifteen minutes later, Tony finally had Bucky’s arm put back together. “How’s it feel?”

“It’s…great. Thanks.” Bucky said with a smile as he looked down at his arm, moving it in different directions. “Good as new.”

“Good.” The genius said as he dropped his tools back into his box. “I’m going to drop this stuff off in my lab and then go find the boys. You staying here?”

 “I’m really tired.” Bucky admitted. “You don’t think Peter would be mad if I stayed here for a while, do you?”

“Pete’s the most understanding kid alive.” Tony said, a hint of pride in his voice. “Besides, he doesn’t have the right to be upset.” Bucky laughed a little bit as he looked back to his arm.

“I’ll stay here then.”

“Okay. See you later.” The genius said, picking up his box before walking from the room and disappearing into the elevator. A wave of exhaustion hit Bucky the moment he was alone and Bucky debated whether he should stay on the couch for a while or go lay in his bed. Ultimately, he decided to go to his room, his bed far more comfortable than the couch was. The super soldier stood up and slowly dragged his feet down the hallway and into his room; he unintentionally fell asleep mere moments after his head hit the pillow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you know how hard it is to do research on a fictional metal with mystical properties? Hint: it's not easy.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you guys enjoy today's chapter!

Bucky sleepily opened his eyes, burying himself deeper beneath the warm covers. He stifled a yawn with his blanket and continued to lay in bed for a few more minutes as he slowly became more alert.

_“Wait a second…what time is it?”_ He thought to himself before peeking out from under the covers, glancing at the alarm clock on his nightstand. _“It’s just after midnight? I must have slept for…almost seven hours? I didn’t even have a bad dream!”_ He thought, a smile spreading across his face. _“No wonder I feel so good; I can’t remember the last time I slept this long! Maybe I can get a few more hours in tonight.”_ Bucky thought eagerly as he dove back beneath his blankets, closing his eyes once again. However, as he lay in the darkness, he began to think about Tony. Tony had not only fixed his arm, but he had also held his hand and helped him to calm down after what the man had called a ‘panic attack’. This was the same man who had forgiven him multiple times though he had never deserved forgiveness for any of his trespasses. Bucky thought about how he had found Tony asleep on the couch the previous night. Peter had said that his mentor never went to the lounge when the man found himself up late. Clearly, Tony didn’t want to be alone either.

“He must have been waiting for me. I can’t leave him alone tonight…especially not after everything he’s done for me.” Bucky thought to himself as he slowly crawled out of bed, selecting one of his smaller blankets to take with him to the lounge. Rubbing his eyes tiredly, the super soldier headed down to the lounge and straight into the kitchen to start a pot of coffee. He pulled two mugs from the cabinet as he waited for the coffee to brew. Once it was ready, Bucky filled one of the mugs for himself, leaving the other next to the carafe in the event that Tony should join him later.

Bucky headed back to the living room, curling up on one of the couches as he held his warm coffee with both hands. He sipped it slowly, eyeing the TV remote curiously. It looked incredibly daunting; he wondered if he would be able to figure out which buttons he needed to use. Bucky had just picked up the remote when he heard the elevator doors open. Turning to see Tony step out into the lounge, Bucky glanced at the time to see that it was not yet one o’clock. He looked back at the disheveled genius and tilted his head.

“You’re up early tonight.” Bucky remarked. Tony nodded tiredly.

“You too. Coffee?”

“In the kitchen.”

“Thanks.” Bucky set the remote down, now glad that he hadn’t gone back to sleep. Tony returned a minute later with a full cup of coffee, surprising Bucky when he sat down right beside the man instead of on the couch opposite him. Up close, Tony’s dark circles looked even worse, and Bucky frowned as he watched the sleepy man sip his coffee.

“Must be pretty bad lately.”

“Huh?”

“Your dreams.”

“Oh…yeah, guess so. How’d you know?”

“Well, for one thing, I’ve seen night skies darker than those circles under your eyes.” Tony chortled as Bucky continued. “And for another, you’re sitting right beside me instead of on the other couch.” Tony immediately stopped laughing, blinking in surprise as if he hadn’t even realized what he had done. Tony started to move, but Bucky shook his head. “Sit down. A few hours ago, you held my hand because I was scared of a damn room. I think we’re past the point of sitting on different couches.” Tony considered that for a brief moment before moving back beside Bucky and silently nodding his head. “Wanna talk about it?”

“It was stupid...”

“So…that’s a yes?” Tony looked up in surprise, stunned by the bluntness of the normally reserved super soldier.

“Since when did you get sassy?” Bucky was taken aback for a moment before he laughed softly, shaking his head.

“Suppose I’m comfortable with you now.” He admitted with a shrug, though being well-rested had also greatly reduced both his anxiety and his paranoia. “What did you dream about?” Tony looked down at his coffee before taking several long sips. He looked back up at Bucky before he dropped his eyes to the floor.

“Wasn’t a normal nightmare. I had a dream I haven’t had in, gosh, I don’t know how long…used to get it all the time as a kid.”

“What was it?”

“…A dream that I was home all alone. Nobody was anywhere in the house. I went outside and still couldn’t find anyone. Then this crow flies up to me and gives me a letter. I open it, and it says everyone left me because I was bad and they never want to see me again…I woke up crying every time.” Tony curled into himself. “It still bothers me, and I don’t know why. I’m not a child.”

“No one likes being alone no matter what age they are.”

“I guess.” Both men were quiet for a few moments before Tony decided to change the subject. “So…how is it being back in New York?”

“…Strange.” Bucky said after a moment of hesitation. “It’s my home, but it doesn’t feel like my home.”

“How so?”

“Well, walking down the street, I kept gettin’ confused even though I knew where I was the whole time. As soon as I saw the street signs I knew, but the streets themselves look so different I hardly recognize ‘em. And just… well, everything. No boys shinin’ shoes on the corner, no telephone booths to make calls from, you know, I didn’t see a single soda fountain while I was out? I didn’t see any men wearing a hat, and a lot of them were wearing short trousers like they…they were at the beach! There weren’t any woman wearing stockings, and I think I only saw one or two wearing red lipstick. People weren’t very friendly either…I know I’m not great to look at these days, but I tried to be polite and smile. No one was very kind…” Tony frowned as he listened to Bucky speak.

“Don’t let all of that bother you. Well, I know it will take a while to get used to the new era, but as for the people…it’s nothing against you personally. Everyone these days is just...less neighborly than the people of your day. The world’s not as safe as it used to be, and I think that’s part of it too. It had nothing to do with you.”

“You think so?”

“Yeah.” Bucky looked at Tony for a moment before dropping his eyes to his mug.

“Can…I tell you something that I’ve never told anyone before?”

“Sure.” Tony said, curious as to what the other man would say.

“I wish I had died when I fell off that train all those years ago.” Tony looked at Bucky, shocked that the typically shy man spoke so openly.

“Why?”

“I…feel like…feel like an evil person who has the memory of a former life where I was a good person. As much as I want to be Bucky Barnes, he feels so…so far away sometimes. I don’t know if I could ever be as happy as I was before the war.”

“…Well, at least you’re not evil. I can tell you that much.”

“How can you be so sure?”

“Because Peter likes you.”

“He’s a good kid. Kinda reminds me of Steve.” Bucky said, smiling fondly before realizing what he had said and quickly adding, “Steve before...the Stevie I grew up with.” The flustered look on Bucky’s face caused Tony to chuckle.

“I knew what you meant.” A sheepish smile played upon the super soldier’s lips as he glanced at Tony.

“Believe it or not, I used to be quite eloquent.”

“Eh, I’d believe it even if Cap hadn’t of told me what a ladies’ man you were. You seemed to be chatting May up pretty well last week.” Bucky shook his head quickly, laughing in embarrassment.

“She is beautiful…but really, she just made me comfortable. She’s easy to talk to like Peter and Shuri…and you, I guess.” The man said as he realized that he had been freely talking to Tony with little anxiety and no fear of consequences.

“ ** _I’m_** easy to talk to? If it weren’t…whatever ungodly hour it is, I’d call Pepper up and make you repeat that.”

“Don’t think she’d agree?” The super soldier asked in amusement.

“She always says I don’t listen well.”

“Huh…” Bucky said, tilting his head as he looked at Tony, “My experience is limited, but you seem to listen where it counts.”

“You’re a wise man, Sergeant Barnes. An ‘intellectual as Peter would say. Your brain may rival Banner’s.”

“Now I see why so many people mistake you as an arrogant bastard.” Bucky replied with a straight face, though there was no mistaking the playful twinkle in his eye.

“Oh, make no mistake, I **_am_** an arrogant bastard.” Tony said with a smirk. Bucky tossed his head back and laughed, at first in surprise, though he soon began to laugh harder than he had in decades. Nightmare forgotten, Tony’s eyes danced as he joined the other man in laughter, delighted that his new friend shared a similar sense of humor.

 

* * *

 

“Friday, where’s Bucky?”

“He’s in the gym, Boss. Should I tell him that you’re looking for him?”

“It’s all right, I’ll go down and see him. Thanks, Fri.” Tony turned a small plastic card over in his hand for a moment before he headed out of his office and into the living room. He glanced at the coffee table which was covered in open bags of chips, candy bar wrappers, and video game paraphernalia. The genius laughed and shook his head as he picked up the remote, turning off the TV that had been left on.

_“Hope the boys aren’t getting into too much trouble.”_ He thought to himself as he turned and headed into the elevator.

“Gym, Fri.”

“Yes, Boss.” Tony leaned back against the wall until the doors opened onto the floor containing the Avengers’ private gym. Stepping out onto the floor, he looked around curiously, not seeing a sign of anyone else. He walked further into the large gym, past most of the workout machines and around the corner to where the weights were kept. Bucky was sitting on a bench with a dumbbell in hand, doing bicep curls. His brow was furrowed in concentration, though he smiled when he noticed Tony.

“Hi.”

“Hey there, Hercules. Lookin’ good.” Tony said as he nodded his head toward the man’s arm.

“It’s easier now that I only have to work on one arm.” Bucky said smugly, causing Tony to chuckle at the man’s self-deprecating remark. “You here to exercise?” He asked with a curious glance at the jeans Tony was wearing.

“Oh, no. Here to see you actually. Needed to drop this off.” Tony said as he held out the credit card he was holding. The super soldier blinked a few times before looking back up at Tony.

“What’s that for?”

“It’s a credit card.”

“I don’t need that.” Bucky said as he resumed his bicep curls.

“Bucky, you don’t exactly have any money right now. Besides, everyone else in the tower has one.” Tony said as he waved the card, wanting the other man to take it from him.

“I don’t need anything.”

“Oh come on, all you really wear are some of Steve’s old clothes. Just take it. If you’re so worried about it, you can pay me back when you get your money. I know you’re good for it.” Tony once again shoved the card in Bucky’s direction. The man hesitated for a moment, taking it only after noting how adamant Tony was that he accept it.

“Thanks, Tony.” Bucky said; though he had no intention of ever using the card, taking it only to placate the other man.

“Good.” The billionaire said, pleased that Bucky had accepted the card. “Well, I’ll let you get back to your workout. I was just going to head down to my lab to do some—“Tony stopped as he heard a loud crash, both his and Bucky’s heads turning toward the distinctive sound of breaking glass.

“Is anyone else down here with you?”

“Not that I know of.” Bucky said seriously. Tony’s jaw clenched as his fingers hovered near his arc reactor. Muffled voices could be heard and Tony began to creep cautiously towards them. Bucky hopped up, walking stealthily beside Tony until they reached the long hallway where the genius motioned for the other man to stay left. The super soldier nodded his understanding, and the two men inched silently down the hallway towards the muffled voices which seemed to be coming from the racquetball court. Tony swallowed a lump in his throat, nervous at who or what they may find in the Avengers’ tower. He turned around in surprise, looking at Bucky as if he had lost his mind when the man began to laugh loudly. The super soldier just pointed toward the glass wall of the racquetball court and Tony moved closer so that he could look through the transparent wall, a wave of relief washing over him as he saw that it was just Peter and Ned looking like a pair of deer caught in headlights. Putting on his best dad face, Tony swung open the door to the racquetball court and stepped inside, Bucky following close behind. Peter was standing on a wall and Ned was standing in the middle of the court, which was littered with random objects and broken glass.

“Care to come down and explain what’s going on here, Spiderman?” Peter slowly walked off the wall and began making his way towards Tony, the boy’s guilty expression making him look akin to a sad puppy. Tony fought to keep his stern expression in place as Peter approached him. “Careful of the glass.” Peter nodded, watching his step until he joined Ned, Tony, and Bucky in the center of the room.

“I’m really sorry. Really really—“

“Peter. What were you doing?”

“Well, Ned and I were playing that new game we told you about a few weeks ago, and there is this one part that’s really hard to get past because you have to dodge all these different items, and it’s really hard to avoid everything, right? So, Ned was like ‘Dude, has anyone ever thrown stuff at you like this?’ and I was like ‘Nah, no one does that for real.’ And he was like, ‘No one else flies around with wings either, but you’re on a team with Falcon and you fought the Vulture.’ And I was like ‘Oh shit, you’re right.’ So we thought I should practice dodging things just in case. We came down here because we thought it would be safe, but then I started trying to fling stuff away from me with my webs while swinging at the same time. And that’s when I accidentally flung a shoe up into the light and it broke…and that’s why there’s glass all over the place.”

“We’re really sorry.” Ned said as Peter stopped to take a breath after his long ramble.

“First Bucky’s arm and now this light? What am I going to do with you boys?”

“We’ll clean it up! I’ll do some work and pay for it, and—“ Tony cut the boy off with a soft laugh which caused both of the teens to look at him in surprise.

“You’re not paying for anything. You’re also not cleaning this up.“

“But, Tony, we made this mess and—“

“I don’t want you boys to hurt yourselves, I’ll have someone else clean it up.”

“I’m Spiderman. I think I can handle some broken glass.” Peter said as he rolled his eyes. Tony raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah, and I’m Iron Man. Iron Man says you’re not touching the broken glass.” Peter frowned and Tony reached out to squeeze his shoulder. “C’mon, I was going to go get some work done in my lab. Why don’t you boys come give me a hand?”

“REALLY?” Ned asked excitedly, Peter scowled at his friend.

“Tony,” He said, turning back to his mentor, “That’s it? You’re not going to get mad or punish us or anything?” Bucky looked at Tony, also curious about the man’s response.

“Nope.”

“Why not?” Peter asked, clearly feeling guilty about the entire ordeal. Tony paused for a few moments before finally speaking up again.

“You’re clearly sorry.” He said as he reached out to ruffle the boy’s hair. He remembered all too well the trouble his curiosity had gotten him into as a teenager. Heck, his curiosity ** _still_** got him into trouble. What was the use of being angry with the boys for accidentally breaking a light? Howard had constantly gotten angry at him over small things that didn’t matter, and it kept a constant wedge between the two of them—Tony didn’t want the same thing to happen to his relationship with Peter. “Just try to be more careful next time. Both this situation and the slime situation could have been avoided if you took a minute to think about what you were doing before doing it. That’s all I want. You’re smart boys, use those brains.” Both Peter and Ned smiled at Tony’s words.

“Yes, Sir.” They said in unison.

“Good, let’s go get to work then.” Peter touched Tony’s arm gently as the man turned to leave.

“Can Bucky come too?” Peter asked, recognizing that his mentor was now friendly with the other man. Tony glanced at Bucky, knowing full well that he would not want to go near the lab.

“He’s more than welcome to come. Although, I’m not sure if he has finished his workout yet.”

“That’s right, Peter.” Bucky said, silently grateful that Tony seemed to know he wouldn’t want to return to the laboratory. “I still need to exercise. I’ll see you guys at dinner though?”

“Sounds good!” Ned and Peter charged out of the room and Tony rolled his eyes.

“I refuse to run! You can wait for me!” Tony called out to the boys. Bucky laughed and Tony looked at the other man and shook his head. “I’m going to have to start dying my hair soon. That kid’s going to make me go grey.”

“You’re really gentle with him.”

“I love him.” Tony said without hesitation, Peter being the one person he could express his love for openly and without shame. “For some reason, I’m lucky enough for him to think of me as his dad. I would do literally anything for him.”

“Is that why you didn’t punish him?”

“No,” Tony said, though that was only half true, “You know he’s a good kid. He was just too excited. Some kids are intentionally destructive, and then there’s Peter and Ned who have only good intentions but get too reckless when they become excited. That’s why I told them to think instead of getting angry. If it happens again, then I’ll get angry that they didn’t think.”

“You’re a good dad. Howard must have set a good example.” Tony chuckled darkly. “When I parent Peter, I always stop and think, ‘what would Howard do?’ and then I do the opposite. So far it’s worked marvelously.”

“Sorry…I…didn’t know. You…didn’t mention him much actually when you told me about your…your past. I just thought that’s because of …because of what I did.” Bucky said, stammering as he suddenly became anxious, not wanting to upset the only friend that he felt truly understood his pain.

“He wasn’t great.” Tony said, noticing that Bucky was tripping over his words again, though he didn’t mention it. “Maybe I’ll tell you about it during one of our midnight rendezvous.” He said as he turned to go.

“All right…I’ll be seeing you.”

“See ya.” Tony disappeared around the corner and Bucky hung his head, sighing before he returned to his bench to resume doing bicep curls.

_“You and your big mouth, Barnes.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two steps forward, one step back. Or is it?
> 
> Ugh, I've had a rough week. I am so SO excited for the upcoming chapters but just have not had time to sit down and write them. I doubt I will have time this weekend, but I'll try my best to update again before next Thursday. :)


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really like this chapter; it's got a little of everything in it. Also, we're FINALLY starting to get into the fun WinterIron interactions, and I'm so excited to start writing more scenes focusing on Tony and Bucky's relationship. 
> 
> We're at about 88,000 words and they are just now starting to become friends. I really wanted to deliver on that promise of a slow, painful burn (that will be so worth it in the end).

Bucky slowly opened his eyes, rolling over to squint through the darkness at the clock on his bedside table. _1:37 AM._

_“Two nights of uninterrupted sleep? It’s a damn miracle.”_ He thought to himself. The super soldier had spent the entire afternoon prior worrying that he had upset Tony with his comment about Howard, though his fears had quickly been alleviated when he saw the man at dinner and the genius had shown no sign of animosity toward him. Bucky had finally started to relax when Tony announced that he and Peter would be taking Ned home. Not particularly wanting to be alone with anyone else in the tower, Bucky had excused himself to his rather dismal room, falling asleep early as a temporary escape from the self-destructive thoughts that filled his mind. Bucky had assumed he would wake up in a cold sweat well before midnight. However, it was nearly two o’clock, and he found himself feeling fairly refreshed for the second night in a row. Though incredibly comfortable, Bucky did not hesitate to roll out of bed and drag himself into the elevator.

“Lounge please, Miss Friday.”

“Yes, Sergeant.”

“Is Tony awake?”

“Yes, Sir. I believe he’s waiting for you.” Bucky smiled at the AI’s words; the thought of someone actually wanting to see him made the man terribly happy.

“Thank you, Miss Friday.”

“You’re welcome, Sergeant.” The doors opened and Bucky stepped out onto the floor, making his way to the living area. Tony was already on one of the couches, and he turned to look at Bucky, relief flickering over his face momentarily before the man’s mask of indifference was replaced.

“You look oddly well-rested.” Tony said as Bucky dropped onto the couch beside him.

“I feel oddly well-rested…you look awful.” Bucky added as he got a good look at the man beside him, who somehow had even darker circles under his eyes than he had had the night before.

“Gee, thanks, Barnes. What a sweet thing for you to say.” Tony said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. The super soldier laughed lightly, though concern clouded his dark features.

“How much sleep did you get tonight?”

“Dunno.” Tony said with a casual shrug. “Maybe an hour or two.” Bucky opened his mouth, but Tony, who was clearly not in the mood for sharing his feelings, cut him off as he grabbed the television remote.

“I don’t feel like talking tonight. How’s a movie sound?”

“…Fine by me. What’ll we watch?”

“Your pick.”

“Oh…uh, what films do you have?”

“All of them.”

“Ever? Even from back in my day?”

“Yep.”

“Could…could we watch ‘Snow White’?” Bucky asked, a glimmer of excitement in his eye.

“Disney’s Snow White?” Tony asked, the burly man’s choice surprising him.

“That’s the one!”

“Uh…yeah. We can watch it.”

“We could watch something else…”

“No, it’s a great movie. Just wasn’t expecting that to be your first choice.”

“I really liked seeing it. I’ll never forget how exciting it was.” The man laughed sheepishly as he fiddled with a loose thread at the hem of his shirt. “Guess it might not seem like a big deal these days, but it was the first…the first film of its kind. No one had ever seen anything like it before. A full-length animated film in color? Lot of people didn’t think it could be done.” Tony hummed thoughtfully as he started the movie.

“Huh…guess some things change pretty quickly.”

“You can say that again.” As the movie began, the two men stopped speaking as they focused their attention on the film. Bucky was mesmerized, just as he had been the first time he saw the movie in 1938. He forgot about everything and everyone outside of the whimsical world on the screen. That is, until he felt Tony’s head drop onto his shoulder about thirty minutes into the movie. Bucky glanced down to see that Tony was leaning against his Vibranium arm, fast asleep. He thought about moving to another couch so Tony could lie down, but upon feeling the warmth of the man’s head on his shoulder, he decided against it. Every moment another human touched him in a non-violent manner was a strong reminder that he was no longer under Hydra’s control. He was no longer a monster; he was Bucky Barnes—even if he was still unsure what exactly that meant anymore.

_“Metal arm can’t be that comfortable though…”_ He mused before carefully moving his arm from beneath Tony to rest on the back of the couch. The sleeping man ended up falling into the super soldier’s side, his cheek resting fully on Bucky’s shoulder _. “Sitting like this won’t hurt for a little bit. I can move when the film ends.”_ Bucky thought to himself as he turned his attention back to the fairytale unfolding on the screen in front of him.

* * *

 

Tony pressed further into the warmth he felt, gripping a handful of the soft material he assumed to be his blanket.

_“I’ve never been more comfortable in my life. Not even coffee will get me out of bed this morning. Well, that’s because Peter’s here and I can get him to bring me coffee.”_ The half-awake man thought with a tired giggle. He sniffled before burying his face into his warm pillow. As he shifted, Tony’s fingers brushed against cool metal _. “What’s this? Part of a bot? Why’s it in my bed?”_ He thought in confusion. A moment later, his pillow began to move and the genius quickly pulled away, his heart beating rapidly in alarm. Tony’s eyes flew open and he found himself face-to-face with an equally alarmed Bucky Barnes. The men stared at each other in confusion for a few seconds, but as they looked from one another down to their entangled legs, they simultaneously realized that they had fallen asleep together on the couch. Tony quickly released Bucky’s shirt as the super soldier hurriedly removed his arm from around Tony’s waist, the genius falling backward off of the couch in his hurried attempt to return to an upright position. Tony stood up quickly, clearing his throat as he stared at the man who was now sitting up on the couch, looking just as uncomfortable as Tony felt.

“So…uh…I’m going to go do some work in my lab for a while…and when I come back to get coffee we’ll just pretend this never happened.”

“Yep.” Bucky agreed quickly. Tony nodded his head before making a beeline for the elevator. The super soldier leaned back against the couch, running a hand down his face.

_“I definitely should have moved last night.”_ Bucky thought with a groan before he got up from the couch and headed into the kitchen to brew an extra-strong pot of coffee.

* * *

 

“But you promised!” Peter whined in Loki’s direction as the god slowly sipped his tea.

“I promised to teach you magic at some point, Little One. I never specified when exactly that would be.” Loki said as he placed his teacup back onto the kitchen table.

“Aw, C'mon, Loki. That’s lame. You know you want to teach me!” Peter said sweetly. Loki chuckled in amusement.

“I do, and I shall teach you someday. Perhaps when you’re a bit older.”

“What? Older? I’m not a kid!”

“Have you looked in the mirror lately?” Sam butted in from across the table, earning a glare from the young hero.

“I don’t think Anthony would approve of me teaching you magic right now.”

“You become friends with Tony and suddenly you care what he thinks.” Peter grumbled as he turned to Bucky who was sitting on the other side of him. “Do you think it’s a bad idea for me to learn magic?”

“Well, I don’t exactly think it’s a ** _good_** idea.” Bucky said as he glanced at Loki, recalling how he had been hurt by the god’s magic.

“What’s not good about it? Just imagine if I could clone myself like Loki does. I could totally use a clone as a distraction when I’m fighting bad guys and I’m all alone. If anything it would almost be irresponsible to **_not_** teach me magic… also, it would be hilarious to scare Sam with my clone.” Peter added as an afterthought; revenge for the man’s earlier remark regarding his age. Bucky smirked before throwing a sidelong glance in Sam’s direction.

“I changed my mind. Learning magic could be great for you.”

“Oh, **_ha ha_**.” Sam said before shoving a spoonful of cereal into his mouth.

“If Tony says that I can learn magic, will you teach me?” Peter asked, turning back to Loki.

“If Anthony agrees, then I would be delighted to teach you.”

“I guess that’s fair then.” Peter said, giving up entirely too easily, though Loki didn’t question the boy as he was distracted by Thor trying to steal a muffin from his plate.

“Just what do you think you’re doing?”

“I’m going to eat one of your muffins.”

“I think not!” Loki protested as he pushed his plate out of Thor’s reach.

“I’m hungry.”

“You’ve eaten six muffins already.”

“I think seven would make me feel better.” Thor said with an impish smile.

“How unfortunate for you.”

“Can’t you just use your magic to whip up a few more muffins so I can have another?”

“I can, but I will not.”

“Is it considered treason if your King asks for a muffin, and you refuse to give him one?” Peter asked to no one in particular.

“Yes, it is.” Thor answered and Loki sputtered, causing both Peter and Thor to laugh in amusement.

“I don’t know what’s going on here, but you two should leave Loki alone before he has an aneurysm.” Tony said as he strolled into the kitchen, heading straight for the coffee pot.

“Tony! I have a big favor to ask you.” Peter said quickly.

“Oh yeah? And what’s that?” The man asked as he poured some coffee into a mug.

“I really, really, REALLY want to learn some magic. Will you buy me a top hat and a wand?”

“Pete, I gave you a credit card—which you never use,” Tony said pointedly, “Just go buy them with that.”

“So you don’t care if I learn magic?”

“Be my guest.” Tony said as he dropped into the open chair beside Bucky, taking a big sip of his coffee. Peter smiled smugly as he turned to look at Loki, who sat in stunned silence. Thor looked from the teen to his brother, suddenly letting out a booming laugh. Tony raised an eyebrow, looking in the Asgardian’s direction. “Hey, Johnny Bravo. Care to enlighten me on what’s so funny?”

“I think your son just outsmarted the God of Mischief.” Tony’s lips curled into a smile at the way Thor referred to Peter, and he tossed a proud look in the teen’s direction.

“Did he now?”

“What can I say? Guess I take after my old ma—“

“Anthony, I told Peter that I would teach him magic only on the condition that you gave your consent.” Loki interrupted. Tony set his mug on the table, raising an eyebrow as he looked at Peter.

“…So, you weren’t talking about the ‘hand is quicker than the eye’ type of magic, but you made me believe that you were by asking for a hat and a wand?” Peter whistled innocently and Tony stared at him for a moment before laughing and shaking his head. “You’re definitely my kid.” Peter beamed, and Loki looked at Tony in disbelief.

“Anthony!”

“What? I would definitely pull a stunt like that.”

“If you both are the type to trick the God of Mischief, does that make you both eligible to be ‘Gods of Mischief’ too?” Bucky asked Peter with a grin as Tony and Loki fought over their heads. The teen’s eyebrows shot up as he considered the question.

“Wow, I’m friends with a true intellectual.” Peter whispered under his breath before he cleared his throat loudly. “Bucky just pointed out to me that Tony and I both meet the qualifications to be Gods of Mischief. As God of Mischief number three, I would like to say that—“

“I beg your pardon?” Loki asked indignantly as everyone else at the table burst into laughter.

“Sounds like I’ve been missing out on a lot of excitement.” The commotion in the kitchen ceased immediately as everyone turned to see Steve standing in the doorway.

“Stevie…” Bucky said, smiling the moment he saw his friend.

“Hey, Buck.” The Captain said, returning Bucky’s smile before he looked at the others in the room. “Sorry to interrupt…but I have something to say.” Peter rolled his eyes, and the action did not go unnoticed by Steve, who felt a pang of guilt, now realizing just how much his actions had hurt the others around him. “I want to apologize for my behavior. I’ve done a lot of thinking the past few days, and I’m starting to realize just how many mistakes I’ve made. It hasn’t exactly been easy for me to adjust to this new century. The world works differently now, but I’ve been trying to do a lot of things like it’s still the 40’s. I’ve been stubborn and selfish, and it has caused a lot of problems for this team. For that, I’m sorry. I owe the biggest apology to Tony. I know that I apologized to you before I left, but I need to say it again. You house us, feed us, make all our gear, and pay for all our expenses—and that’s on top of everything else you do. Even when I treated you horribly, you continued to take care of me, and I’m sorry that I didn’t realize how much I was hurting you sooner… Anyway, I know that only about half of you are here; I’ll talk to the others later. I just needed to let everyone know how sorry I am. I can’t promise that I won’t mess up again, but I can promise to do my best to make better decisions and listen more carefully.” Bucky smiled proudly as he listened to his friend’s speech; this was the Steve he remembered.

“Thanks, Cap.” Tony said, and it was clear to the others that he was holding back tears, though everyone pretended not to notice. Peter glanced at his mentor before fixing his gaze on Steve.

“You can’t just waltz back in here and pretend that everything’s okay. You caused Tony years of pain…and you let America down.” Peter said harshly, surprising the others in the room. Steve’s face fell and Tony whistled lightly, pointing towards the living room as he stood up.

“Other room, Kid. Now.” Peter did as he was told, following Tony into the living room. Once they were both sitting on one of the couches, Tony folded his arms. “What the hell was that?”

“What?”

“Apologies aren’t easy, Peter. That’s certainly not how you should react to one.”

“How can you say that? He hurt you!”

“Hurt. Past tense.”

“I don’t care! He used his title to do whatever he wanted and pretend it was for the good of the nation! And it wasn’t like he said something to hurt your feelings one time. He hurt you deeply. For years! I can forgive almost anyone for almost anything, but not for hurting you. Nuh uh. You’re Tony Stark, and you deserve better than that.” Peter said protectively. Tony stared at the seething teenager for a few moments before leaning forward to kiss the boy’s forehead.

“That’s for loving me unconditionally.” Tony said before gently smacking the back of Peter’s head. “And that’s for saying stupid stuff.”

“Ow!”

“Oh, please. That didn’t hurt.” Tony said, and Peter just sulked quietly because it really hadn’t hurt. After a moment, Tony’s features softened and he released a long sigh. “What Cap did still hurts—probably always will if I think about it. Before Bucky came here, you told me that he deserved a second chance just like I got. Doesn’t Steve deserve that too? It won’t always be easy, but our team wouldn’t be complete without him… besides, one thing has never changed about the guy, and that’s that he only says what he means. Give him a chance to be the Cap you idolized growing up. I know he let you down, but he still deserves your forgiveness and a second chance.”

“…You’re right.” Peter admitted after several moments of silence.

“Aren’t I always?” The boy rolled his eyes and Tony chuckled as he stood back up. “Go talk to Steve for a minute, then meet me in the garage. We’ll go out and do something fun, just the two of us.” Peter nodded as Tony headed toward the elevator, the young hero reluctantly heading back into the kitchen. He groaned internally as the adults all turned to watch him walk into the room. Steve was sitting beside Bucky where Tony had been sitting, and Peter approached him, fidgeting uncomfortably before he finally spoke up.

“I’m sorry for what I said. Everyone does stuff they regret…I can tell you’re sorry…just…please try not to let me or Tony down again.” He said quietly. Steve reached up to squeeze the boy’s arm gently.

“Thank you, Peter. I can promise that.” The Captain said with a hopeful smile. Peter mustered a small smile for Steve before slowly backing out of the kitchen.

“Gotta go…see you later.” The boy said, turning quickly to flee the uncomfortable atmosphere of the kitchen and make his escape for the garage.

* * *

 

As the two super soldiers stepped out onto Steve’s floor, Steve reached out to clap his friend on the back.

“I need to apologize to you too, Buck.”

“What for?”

“What do you mean, ‘What for?’? I know I put a lot of pressure on you. I expected you to be the exact man I remember, and that’s not fair. Seventy years is a long time, and you’ve also been to Hell and back. I was being selfish, and I’m really sorry. I know that your heart is still the same, and that’s what counts.” Bucky smiled at the words, unconsciously reaching his hand up to touch his chest.

“You think that deep down under all this mess, the old Bucky Barnes is really here?”

“Of course, Buck. People change. It’s part of life. People change, but if they stay true to themselves, their heart should stay the same. That’s something I thought a lot about the past few days... You know, America’s different now. If I want to be the Captain America this country needs, I have to stop acting like it’s the 40s. Being a vigilante only hurt people I care about. Somewhere along the way, I stopped being true to myself. Biggest mistake I ever made.”

“That’s the heart of the little punk I grew up with.” Bucky said with a soft smile. Steve chuckled and shook his head slightly as he looked at his friend with concern.

“How are you doing here? Honest answer.”

“Honestly? …Better. Some days are fine. Others…not so much. But…the nights…the nights aren’t as hard lately.”

“I’m glad it’s getting better…you know I’m here for you if you need me, right?”

“I know, Stevie.”

“Good.”

“And there is one thing I could use your help with…”

“What is it?”

“My back pay…I tried to look into it myself…I don’t understand some of the documents I need to submit, and I don’t know where to find others. I’d really like some money soon, and since no one will give me a job…”

“Don’t worry. I’ll help you square things away.” Steve reassured his friend.

“I can always count on you, huh?”

“I’m with you till the end of the line.” Bucky rolled his eyes, grabbing a throw pillow off the nearby couch and smacking Steve with it.

“You’ll never let me forget that corny line, will ya?”

“Not in a million years.” Steve said with a grin. Bucky laughed as he hit his friend with the pillow once more. Life was far from perfect, but for the first time in ages, Bucky had hope for the future.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What was your favorite part of this chapter? My favorite part of the chapter was either when Tony and Bucky woke up on the couch together, or when Tony kissed Peter on the forehead and followed it by Gibbs slapping him lmao. 
> 
> I'm very excited for the next chapter too. Fingers crossed I can find time to get it up by the weekend!


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please read the endnotes today!**

Tony woke up trembling, curling into himself as tears rolled down his cheeks. He reached up to roughly wipe his face as if he were afraid that someone else would see him crying; despite being alone in his room. He took a shaky breath before rolling over to look at the clock which displayed the time as just past two o’clock in the morning. Tony growled in frustration.

_“I’m so damn tired. I just want to sleep. Why can’t I have just one night of high-quality sleep? Hell, I’d settle for decent quality sleep. I’m literally scared to go to bed. Who’s scared of that? Even babies aren’t scared to go to bed. It’s been nearly a week since I actually slept, and…”_ Tony’s internal monologue stopped momentarily as he thought back to the last night he had gotten a decent night’s rest; the night he had fallen asleep on the couch with Bucky. _“Haven’t slept that good since Pete slept with me…can’t let myself get dependent on the kid…but Bucky…”_ Tony shook his head quickly. _“What the hell is wrong with you, Stark? You’re so tired, you're losing it. You can’t just ask another person to go to bed with you—that could **definitely** be taken the wrong way…but then again… Bucky has nightmares too. He might not think it’s a terrible idea.  We spend most nights together anyway. Shouldn’t we at least get a little shuteye?”_ After several moments of internally fighting with himself, Tired Tony defeated Rational Tony, and the man kicked off his covers with determination. He swung his feet over the side of his bed, rubbing his eyes as his feet slid into a pair of slippers. The genius tiptoed from his room and into the elevator, rehearsing what he wanted to say so that there was no chance Bucky could misunderstand his suggestion. Before Tony realized it, the doors opened, and he stepped out into the dimly lit lounge as a clearly exhausted super soldier glanced in his direction.

“Just finished brewing. Still piping hot.” Bucky said as he held up his mug before moving it to his lips to take a sip.

“Nah, don’t need it.” Tony said with a wave of his hand. Bucky raised an eyebrow as he looked at the other man.

“Why not?”

“I’m going back to bed.”

“How do you plan on falling back asleep?”

“Because I’m not going to sleep alone.” Bucky looked at Tony in confusion, and the genius rolled his eyes as he dramatically threw his hands up into the air. “You. You’re coming to bed with me.”

“Uh…huh?” Bucky looked more baffled than judgmental, but Tony quickly spoke before the man could misunderstand his intentions.

“Listen, Bucky. I know we said we’d never talk about it again, but when we fell asleep down here last week, I slept like a damn baby and I’m guessing that you did too. I have nightmares that prevent me from sleeping. You have nightmares that prevent you from sleeping. We already spend all our nights together. So, instead of sitting up, you come to bed with me. We can help each other out if there are any…you know, nightmares or anything.” Bucky stared at Tony, not saying anything for several moments. Tony began to panic internally and was considering rescinding the offer when Bucky shrugged his shoulders and moved to stand up.

“All right.”

“…All right?” Tony blinked, and Bucky nodded.

“Yeah, lead the way. I can’t get up to your floor without special permission, right?”

“Oh, uh…yeah. That’s right.” Tony said, somewhat surprised—he hadn’t expected Bucky to agree so easily. Quickly regaining his composure, the billionaire led the way back into the elevator, asking Friday to take them to his floor. The two men rode in silence, Tony glancing at Bucky as the other man covered a large yawn. Just before the doors opened onto his floor, Tony fully turned to look at the super soldier beside him. “Use those stealthy spy skills of yours when the doors open. Pete has sensitive hearing, and I don’t want to wake him up.” Bucky nodded seriously as the elevator opened up onto Tony’s floor. Bucky followed the genius as he slipped from the elevator, looking around curiously at his new friend’s personal floor. He only got a brief look as the two men quickly snuck to Tony’s bedroom, Tony quietly closing the door once they were both inside.

“Which side’s mine?” Bucky asked as he walked in the direction of Tony’s oversized bed, suddenly a bit excited upon seeing the overabundance of pillows and blankets on the mattress.

“Uh, left side.” Tony said as he followed Bucky. The super soldier climbed under the covers, careful to stay on his side of the bed as Tony slid under the covers on the opposite side.

“I’ve never seen a bed this big before…wow, this blanket is so soft.” Bucky murmured as he ran his fingers over a luxuriously soft fleece blanket on the bed. “Is it okay if I use two pillows?” Tony looked at the dozen or so pillows on his bed before looking back at the other man.

“Yeah, I think I can spare a few.” Tony said with a snort as he lay down, rolling onto his side with his back to the other man before he pulled the blankets up around his shoulders. Bucky also moved to lay down against several pillows, sighing in satisfaction as he closed his eyes. Tony reached to flick off the light, and the room went dark. After a few moments, Bucky cracked open an eye and glanced in the direction of a small light coming from the nightstand beside Tony.

“Hey, Tony?”

“Yeah?”

“You forgot to turn a light off.” Tony was silent for several moments before finally responding.

“…I didn’t forget.”

“Oh…okay.” Bucky closed his eyes and lay in silence for several more minutes, beginning to drift off when he heard Tony’s voice again.

“Bucky?”

“Hm?”

“Is this weird?”

“What?”

“Us sleeping together.”

“…I dunno. Used to snuggle up with fellas from my outfit when we were in the trenches. Slept that way because it was too cold not to…guess this is sorta the same… ‘cept we’re trying to keep away the nightmares instead of the cold.” Tony opened his eyes and turned his head to glance at Bucky, whose eyes were still closed. He smiled softly, finding it amusing how thick the man’s outdated accent became when he was half asleep. After a moment, he closed his eyes.

“Good night.” Tony received no response but he didn’t mind. Closing his eyes, he started to drift off to sleep, hoping that he would finally be able to get a good night’s rest.

* * *

 

Bucky slowly woke up the next morning, forcing open his heavy eyelids after he yawned. He blinked a few times as he stared up at the ceiling, his brow furrowing in confusion. Panic settled over him as he did a visual sweep of the room, not recognizing it. He started to move, but he felt a weight on his chest, his right arm seemingly forced down. The former assassin bolted upright in an attempt to break free of any restraints, causing Tony, who had been snuggling up against Bucky, to fly forward to the end of the bed. Tony awoke with a start, looking around wildly as Bucky looked at him in bewilderment. As the night before came back to him, he crawled forward as he bit his bottom lip.

“Sorry…you okay?” Tony was clearly shaken at being awoken in such a manner, but he nodded as he massaged his arm.

“What happened?”

“I… didn’t know where I was. Couldn’t move my arm and I got scared. Didn’t realize you were holdin’ onto it.” Bucky said with a soft laugh in an attempt to downplay his racing heart. Tony’s cheeks darkened ever so slightly and he cleared his throat as he looked away, his gaze falling upon the alarm clock beside his bed. Eyes widening, Tony gently reached out, hitting the super soldier’s arm before he gestured toward the clock.

“It’s after nine. We slept for nearly seven hours.” Tony grinned as he looked at Bucky, whose own look of surprise melted into a smile a moment later.

“I didn’t have a nightmare.”

“Neither did I.” Tony and Bucky stared at each other for a moment. Tony sniffed and glanced back at the clock. “So…uh,” Tony cleared his throat and shrugged his shoulders, “Maybe we should just cut the whole ‘midnight rendezvous’ crap and just plan to go to bed together.” Bucky nodded immediately in agreement—he couldn’t remember the last time he had felt safer when he slept.

“Our secret?” Bucky asked hopefully.

“Absolutely.” Tony agreed before looking at his friend in amusement. “But I thought it wasn’t weird?”

“Not for us…but I don’t wanna go explain my nightmares to everyone else that lives here.”

“Fair point. Neither do I.” The two were quiet for a moment and Tony flopped back against the pillows.

“Friday, the Sergeant here has unrestricted access to this floor. You’re not to give that information to anyone—not even Peter.” Bucky looked at Tony in surprise.

“Yes, Sir.”

“You sure, Tony? Not even the other Avengers have access to your—“

“And when have any of them ever calmed me down?” Tony snapped, instantly regretting the words the moment they left his mouth. “…Sorry.” He said softly. “Forget I said that.”

“...I can tell they love you.” Tony looked away and didn’t say a word. Bucky sighed, pushing himself up off the bed. “Miss Friday, where’s Peter?” Bucky asked softly, not wanting to run into the boy outside Tony’s room.

“He’s down in the lounge, Sergeant.”

“Thanks, Doll.” He glanced back at Tony. “I’ll head down for breakfast…you coming?”

“I’ll come down in a few minutes…don’t want to go down together.” Tony added after a brief pause.

“Right. See ya down there.” Bucky said as he exited the bedroom, closing the door behind himself. Tony sighed and buried his face into a pillow.

_“You’re showing too many emotions, Tony. Stark men are made of iron.”_ He had always hated those words. Peter had told him they were stupid; he was inclined to agree. However, he had learned that whether a Stark man was made of iron or not, he needed to act like it in order to get any respect. The moment anyone got a glimpse of Tony’s true, gentle nature, was the moment his relationship with that person was seemingly ruined forever. No one wanted a sensitive Tony Stark. People wanted Iron Man. _“The night terrors have been getting worse…if you have a chance of anyone tolerating them, it’s Bucky—he has them too. You blow this with him, and who knows when you’ll get a peaceful nights’ sleep again.”_ Tony hugged his pillow tightly for a few moments before releasing it with a deep sigh. Reluctantly rolling out of bed, Tony stretched before he set off for the lounge, clenching his jaw tightly as he went.

* * *

 

“What’d I miss?” Tony asked as he walked into the laughter-filled kitchen, moving up behind Peter before affectionately squeezing the boy’s shoulders. Peter half turned to look up at Tony with a grin.

“Thor told Bucky that his hair makes him miss when he had long hair, and now Loki’s pissed.”

“I am not _‘ **pissed’**_ , Little One. I was simply curious to know why **_my_** long hair never made Thor miss his own.

“Thor said it’s too greasy!” Peter said with a snicker. Tony bit back a laugh as Loki glared in his direction.

“I didn’t say ‘greasy’, Peter… I said it was shinier than my own was.” Thor said, an amused smile on his face. Loki side-eyed his brother.

“The child’s right. It means the same thing. Even a dullard such as yourself knows that.” Peter gasped dramatically as his head whipped back in Thor’s direction, but the older Asgardian simply laughed.

“I meant no offense, Brother. Bucky’s just looks much more similar to mine than yours did.”

“If you think my hair so repulsive, just say it.”

“If I thought that, I wouldn’t have kept it braided into mine for so long.” Thor said with a sly smile, knowing that his words would end the trivial argument started by his hotheaded brother.

“Don’t stop there. This sounds interesting.” Tony said with a smirk. Peter nodded his agreement. Loki protested, but Thor ignored his brother.

“Loki has faked his death many times. On one such occasion, when I believed him to truly be dead, I cut a lock of his hair and braided it into my own. Even after I found out he was alive, I continued to keep it in my hair…until that creepy old man on Sakaar cut all my hair off and swept it away. He wouldn’t even let me keep the braid." Thor said angrily.

“That must have been just awful…but I remember you told me before that he had some weird spinning blades, right? I mean, in theory, your hair should have looked awful, but you got such a cool haircut. I wonder if I could invent something similar to—“

“Don’t even think about it. I see you put spinning blades near anyone’s head, and my lab is off limits. Capisce?” Tony asked as he looked down at the teenager.

“Dunno how I’m ever gonna become a great inventor if I’m not allowed to work on any inventions…” Peter mumbled under his breath. Bucky chuckled and Tony narrowed his eyebrows at the other man who quickly stopped laughing.

“Peter.”

“Yeah, I understand.”

“Aww, is Iron Daddy mad at Spider Baby?” Sam asked as he walked into the kitchen.

“Don’t ever call me that again.” Tony and Peter said in unison. Sam smirked as he headed over to the refrigerator and a moment later Tony moved to grab himself a cup of coffee, sitting next to Thor as he began to sip his drink.

“Well, now that there are several of you here, I need to get going.” Peter said as he stood up. “Bucky, can I go to your room?”

“Uhh…sure?”

“What do you need in his room?” Tony asked. Peter smiled smugly.

“Can’t tell you guys. But anyway, you all need to keep Bucky from bothering me. I’ll come find you later.” Peter said before darting out of the room. The men all glanced at each other curiously.

“Should I be worried?” The super soldier asked as he glanced at Tony.

“Peter’s responsible…” The genius took another sip of coffee before glancing back at Bucky. “…But if he breaks anything, I’ll replace it.” That earned a laugh from the others in the room before they all began to toss out suggestions on what the young hero was planning.

* * *

 

“There you are!” Peter said as he walked into the gym, staring at the three men on the weight benches in front of him. “I’ve been looking all over for you!” Bucky and Thor, both mid-lift, glanced at Peter. Tony, who was simply lounging on his weight bench, chuckled as he set down his Starkpad.

“Why didn’t you just ask Friday where we were?” Peter blinked a few times.

“I was too excited to think straight!” The boy said before cocking his head to the side. “Why aren’t you lifting?”

“I’m just here for moral support. No use in competing with these two beefcakes. I’ll just settle for being the pretty one.”

“Oh my **_gosh._** ” Peter said as he ran a hand down his face. “You’re so embarrassing.”

“Am I wrong?” Tony asked with a grin.

“Nope.” Bucky agreed.

“You’re beautiful, Tony.” Thor said with a chuckle before glancing at Peter.

“I hate you all.” Tony and Thor both laughed loudly, and even Bucky’s normally soft laugh was audible; it took less than ten seconds for Peter’s look of annoyance to melt into a grin.

“Bucky, c’mon. I have something to show you.”

“WE have something to show you.” Another voice called out, seemingly from nowhere.

“Oh yeah, _**WE**_ do.” Bucky looked perplexed as he frowned at Peter.

“We?” Peter pulled his phone from his pocket and flipped it around to show Wakanda's princess on the screen.

“Shuri!” Bucky exclaimed, his face lighting up as he jumped off the bench to move closer to Peter. “Isn’t it late in Wakanda?”

“It is, but Peter and I have been busy for the past few hours.”

“Busy? Doing what?”

“You’ll see! Peter, show him!”

“Right! I’ll come back up here in a few minutes, Tony.” Peter said with a quick glance in his mentor’s direction.

“If it’s more than fifteen, go to my lab.”

“Okay!” Peter wasted no time, grabbing the former assassin’s arm and nudging him gently toward the elevator.

“What is all this?” Bucky asked with a laugh as he stepped into the lift. Peter exchanged an excited glance with Shuri.

“It’s a surprise, duh.” The princess said.

“A good surprise?” Bucky asked. He knew that is must be good if it was being prepared by Peter and Shuri, but he couldn’t help but feel a bit apprehensive—he couldn’t remember the last time he had a nice surprise.

“Of course it’s a good surprise!” Peter said, A moment later, the doors opened onto Steve’s floor and Peter hurriedly pushed Bucky down the hall, unsure if the Captain was on his floor or not. At the end of the hallway, the teenager stopped the man right outside his closed door.

“Close your eyes!” Peter said excitedly. Bucky did as he was told, chuckling as he heard Shuri tell Peter to point the camera at his face.

“I want to see his reaction. You better not make me miss it!”

“I won’t!” Peter insisted. “Keep your eyes closed until I say so, okay?”

“They’re closed.” Bucky reassured with a smile. The man heard his bedroom door swing open, but kept his eyes closed for another moment until Peter told him to open them. When Bucky opened his eyes and looked forward curiously, he let out a soft gasp. Eyes widening, he took a step into his bedroom. Bucky’s quarters had been transformed from a plain, drab room into a magical one. The bed had been pushed up against one wall. A tapestry covered in stars was hung on the wall beside it, and fabric had been draped from the ceiling over the bed, giving the illusion of the bed being a magical fort. The nightstand had also been moved to remain beside the bed, and Bucky noticed that not only had his photo with Shuri been placed into a frame, but there were two other photos in frames beside it—a picture of himself with Peter that the two had taken the week before, and a very old picture of him and Steve; one that had been taken before the Winter Soldier. Around the room were a few small plants, a soft rug, and plenty of warm white fairy lights—all things that Peter had noticed Bucky seemed drawn to when he first showed the man room tours on YouTube. Bucky turned slowly, continuing to take everything in, but he froze in place when he noticed a large art print above his dresser. He broke out into a wide smile, and a tear that he couldn’t stop rolled down his cheek.

“I told you that was worth waiting for!” Bucky heard Shuri say and he laughed softly.

“I just…wow…” The man said as he continued to stare at the large print of a Wakandan sunset that had clearly been captured from his favorite spot not far outside the palace. Bucky stared at it for several more moments before his eyes fell onto what appeared to be a suitcase on top of his dresser. “What’s that?” Bucky asked as he moved closer and Peter moved eagerly beside the super soldier.

“A record player.” Bucky’s eyes widened in surprise. “You found one?”

“They still make new ones…they’re kind of trendy.” Peter said. “I went to an old record store. Look what I found!” He said as he pointed to several WWII era records, one of them being a Dinah Shore album. Bucky stared at the records before looking around the room once more. After a moment, he grabbed Peter and pulled him into a tight hug. The teenager beamed as he returned the gesture. Several minutes later, Bucky finally pulled himself away.

“Wish my best girl was here so I could give her a hug too.”

“I’ll try to visit soon! T’Challa keeps saying that he has something he has to do in New York. I’m trying to convince him to do it sooner rather than later, but I guess he’s busy being a king or whatever.” Shuri said, causing Bucky to laugh. After a moment the princess sighed, “You really like it?”

“I love it. Thank you both.” Bucky said as he looked back at Peter. Both teenagers smiled in satisfaction before the girl yawned suddenly.

“I really need to sleep…I miss you Bucky…can we talk again soon?”

“I hope so, Shuri.”

“Hey, what about me?” Peter chimed in. Shuri rolled her eyes.

“We text every day.”

“Yeah, so?”

“I’m going to bed. Bye, Bucky!” Shuri said, laughing as she hung up without saying a word to Peter.

“Rude!” The boy exclaimed. Bucky chuckled softly. 

“Thank you, Peter…this…it really is amazing.” The man said once more, but Peter just shook his head.

“It was fun. I had to do it all since Shuri’s not here, but she designed most of it. I couldn’t have made it look this cool by myself.” Bucky took another look around the room, and Peter shoved his phone back in his pocket. “I have to go find Tony now. See you tonight, maybe?”

“Yeah…I’ll see you at dinner.” The boy bounded happily out of the room, and Bucky continued to take in everything for several minutes before he moved to sit on the bed, several tears silently rolling down his cheeks. Soon, Bucky found himself sobbing. The man curled up on his bed, burying his face into a soft, new pillow. His room no longer felt depressing or sad; he no longer thought of where he could hang himself as he looked around the room. Bucky's space was now filled with beautiful things that he admired, but never dreamed would actually be in his own space. However, what really made Bucky the happiest was the act of kindness that made him feel two things he had not felt in a very long time—special and worthy of love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to have two chapters up by this time, but it has been another rough week. I do like this chapter though, I hope you guys enjoy it too! Let me know what you think. :)
> 
> **I'm doing what all responsible adults do when they have a rough couple of weeks; I'm taking a few days off work to fly to Disney World lmao. There will still be a chapter next week, but most likely it will not be posted until Friday or Saturday. Thank you for understanding ♥


	27. Chapter 27

“They did such a good job! I can’t believe it. It feels…feels like something out of a movie. There’s lights and stars…and this…this big picture. It’s my favorite view in Wakanda…it looks so real…” Bucky continued to gush openly at dinner about Peter and Shuri’s surprise, so excited that he hardly stammered though everyone’s eyes were on him.

“I saw it earlier. It looks great. You did a wonderful job, Peter.” Steve said once his friend had finished speaking. The teen looked hesitant to accept the compliment from the Captain, but after a quick moment of reconsideration, he managed a small smile.

“Thank you.” Peter said quietly. Though it wasn’t met with the enthusiasm Steve had hoped for, the Captain was still glad it was a step in the right direction.

“If it’s not an imposition, I’d quite like to see what Peter has done to your room.” Thor said as he set his napkin down onto the table.

“As would I.” Loki agreed quickly. Bucky wasn’t thrilled about having the God of Mischief in his personal quarters, but he agreed with little hesitation, knowing that Loki wouldn’t try anything as long as his brother was around.

“Sure, if you want to. I’m finished eating. We can go now if you want.” Bucky said as he pushed his chair back from the table, unaware of how amused his childlike excitement made the others. “Tony, you wanna come see it too?” Bucky asked, much to the surprise of almost everyone else in the room.

“Wouldn’t miss seeing my kid’s handiwork.” The genius said with a chuckle, reaching over to squeeze Peter’s shoulder. The teen rolled his eyes but was wearing a large smile, pleased that his and Shuri’s secret project had made Bucky happier than they had realized it would.

“Wow, you invite that asshole to see your room, but not me? All right, I see how it is.” Sam said, prompting a snicker from Peter.

“Who wouldn’t invite me to their bedroom?” Tony asked, smirking at Sam from across the table.

“EW!” Peter exclaimed in disgust. Sam glanced at Peter before nodding his head in the teenager’s direction.

“Never thought I’d say this, but I agree with the Spiderkid. Ew.”

“I know why Peter is saying ‘Ew’, but don’t pretend that you wouldn’t love to have me in your bed.”

“I don’t have to pretend. I would hate it.”

“Do I need to buy you some glasses? I’m not sure you can see my beautiful face from the other side of the table.”

“Beautiful?” Sam asked with a scoff.

“Yes, Beautiful. Thor can confirm.”

“I did tell Tony he was beautiful earlier.” Thor said with a chuckle.

“But to be fair, Thor thinks everyone is beautiful.” Loki added and Thor looked at his brother.

“That’s also true.” He agreed.

“Ha!” Sam said as he looked at Tony, who scowled at Loki.

“Whose side are you on?”

“Did you forget that I’m the God of Mischief, Anthony? I don’t take sides, I just agree with whatever causes me the most amusement.”

“Okay!” Steve said as he stood up and clapped his hands. “Dinner’s over. Guess we can all go see Bucky’s room now.”

“Thank god.” Peter said as he hurriedly stood up, following an excited Bucky Barnes who was already halfway out the door.

* * *

 

“It’s my favorite spot in Wakanda. Watching the sunset from there is incredible. The colors are…they’re even more vivid in person!” Bucky rambled as he set a record of Dinah Shore onto his turntable, smiling a moment later as he heard the music begin to play. “And look at all the little lights! There are so many, I don’t even need to turn the ceiling light on.” Bucky nudged Sam, who happened to be the person closest to him, and pointed at his bed. “Do you see what they did to my bed? Doesn’t it look great?” Sam took another quick look around the room, before turning back to the super soldier beside him. He opened his mouth to make an offhanded comment about how the room would be great if Bucky were a teenage girl, but closed his mouth upon seeing the excitement in the other man’s eyes. It was the first time that Sam had seen a trace of genuine happiness on Bucky’s face, and somehow, it didn’t seem right to take that away from him.

_“Guy’s been through enough shit. Guess I can give him this_.” Sam thought to himself before clapping Bucky on the shoulder. “Yeah, looks great man.” Bucky simply grinned in response before walking toward Peter who stood with Tony and Natasha on the other side of the room.

“You did a great job, Peter. This looks like something from a magazine.” Natasha complimented.

“Shuri designed most of it! I just kinda put stuff where she told me to…although I did pick out that moon and stars tapestry by the bed.” Peter said proudly.

“That’s one of my favorite things in the room.” Bucky interrupted as he moved to stand beside Peter.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah…you and Shuri did a great job.”

“You’ve said that like a million times!”

“It’s true…I just…can’t remember the last time I’ve had such a nice surprise.” Though Bucky was smiling brightly, the words made Peter feel a bit sad, and he turned to hug the super soldier tightly. Bucky blinked in surprise but didn’t hesitate to return the hug, looking up at Tony and Natasha as he hugged the teenager.

“I hate to interrupt, but I must compliment Peter on his excellent work.” Thor said with a smile as he stepped closer to the two hugging. “It’s very calming here. Perhaps I should have you decorate a room when you come to visit New Asgard.” Peter’s eyes widened.

“Seriously?”

“Yes, we could use a room like this in our palace, couldn’t we, Loki?” The younger Asgardian looked slightly surprised at his brother’s words before a soft smile spread over his features. 

“Yes, I think it might be rather nice to read in a room decorated in a similar fashion.”

“All right, you’re on. Ned can help me too! He’s still invited right?”

“Of course, your friend is always welcome!” Thor said with a laugh as an excited smile spread across Peter’s face.

“Oh man, I can’t wait until tomorrow to tell him about this. I gotta call him now!” Peter started to head out of the room before quickly glancing at Steve and then back to Tony. “We still gonna watch a movie upstairs?”

“Yeah, Bud. Go on and call Ned. I’ll be upstairs in a few.” Tony said with a nod; he knew that Peter was less concerned about the movie and more concerned about how he’d fare with Steve in the room. The teenager seemed content with the answer and he quickly left the room, his phone already up to his ear. Tony chatted casually with the others for a few more moments about the décor before everyone turned to leave the room. The genius stifled a yawn as he began to shuffle along behind the others, stopping when he felt Bucky grab his arm. He gave the other man a questioning look, and Bucky glanced at the others already disappearing into the hallway as he leaned closer to Tony.

“Can we sleep here tonight?” Bucky asked hopefully.

_“Steve’s floor isn’t nearly as private as mine is…but I can’t really say no to him. I already snapped at him this morning… I can’t risk him wanting to stop our little arrangement. At least not until I’m well-rested enough to find an alternative solution. It’ll probably be fine…He was a ghost for seventy years, and I’m a genius. No one will find out.”_ Tony thought to himself before shrugging his shoulders. “Why not?”

“Thanks.” Bucky said, his eyes lighting up. Tony found himself unwittingly returning the super soldier’s smile; happiness suited the former assassin.

“I’ll be down after I watch a movie with the kid then…see ya.” Tony said as he turned to leave. Bucky released the other man’s arm and watched him leave before turning back to his room.

_“Still can’t believe this little piece of Heaven is really mine.”_

* * *

 

After their movie had ended, Peter and Tony sat on the couch and talked for over an hour. They didn’t talk about anything in particular; Tony mainly just listened to Peter talk about the video game he was playing with Ned. Though he wasn’t normally the type of person to enjoy listening to someone ramble on about a topic that he had little to no interest in, Tony had found that he enjoyed listening to Peter talk about anything that excited him.

“Anyway, it’s getting kinda late. I should head out on patrol!” Peter said as he hopped up from the couch.

“Is it really that late?” Tony asked as he glanced at his watch, surprised to see that it was nearly nine o’clock.

“Yep! Will you be up when I get back?”

“Uh…I’m not sure. I’m really tired tonight.”

“Really?” Peter asked, looking pleasantly surprised. “Don’t wait up for me, okay? Karen can always tell Friday to wake you up if something goes wrong—which it won’t.” Tony chuckled.

“All right, Spiderman. I’ll keep that in mind.”

“Good! G’night, Tony!” Peter said as he hopped over an ottoman on the way to his room.

“Night, Underoos!” Tony called out as he watched the teen disappear down the hallway. The genius smiled to himself as he leaned back against the couch, replaying the conversation that he had been having with the boy in his mind. Suddenly, his smile melted into a frown as it occurred to him that summer was halfway over—soon school would start. That meant Peter would be going back to school and Tony would only get the weekends with him—if he was lucky. The thought of Peter not being a part of his daily life upset him more than he realized that it would, and he curled into himself, unconsciously rubbing his left arm as his eyes fell to the video game controllers and chip bags littering his coffee table.

_“At least it will be cleaner when the kid’s not around every day.”_ He thought, trying to make himself hate the idea of Peter going back to school a little bit less. It didn’t work. Tony sighed and stood up, making his way back to his room as he continued to nurse his left arm. He took a quick shower before donning a white tee and some flannel pajama pants. After moving back into his room, he flopped onto his bed. The genius glanced at the clock beside his bed with a sigh. 9:14 PM.

_“Definitely too early for bed.”_ Tony thought to himself. He lay still for several minutes and stared at the ceiling before finally sitting up with a groan. “Hey, Friday. Where’s Cap?”

“Captain Rogers is currently in the lounge with Dr. Banner, Ms. Romanoff, and the elder Odinson brother.”

“Where’s Bucky?”

“Sergeant Barnes is in his room.”

“He’s alone?”

“Yes, sir.” Tony hesitated for a moment before glancing back at the clock. It was still early, but maybe Bucky wouldn’t mind the company.

“Thanks, Sweetheart.” Tony said after a moment. “Call the elevator for me?”

“Right away, Boss.” The man got up and headed out of his room, shutting his door behind him so that Peter would think he had gone to bed. He glanced inside the boy’s room as he passed it, smiling at the disarray inside. He felt another pang of sadness, causing him to shake his head and quickly move through the rest of his floor and into the elevator.

“Steve’s floor, Friday.”

“Yes, Sir.” The doors to the elevator closed for merely a few moments before opening onto the Captain’s floor. Tony stepped out of the lift and moved down the hallway leading to Bucky’s room, knocking lightly on the door.

“Come in!” Tony opened the door and poked his head into the dimly lit room to see Bucky lounging in one of his new Papasan chairs as he listened to music under the fairy lights. The super soldier looked at him in surprise before he glanced at the clock on his wall.

“I thought you were Steve. You’re down here early.”

“Uh…yeah. Pete’s on patrol and Friday said Steve’s upstairs so…thought it might be easier to just come down now. I can come back later…”

“Nah, I didn’t mean it like that. Come here.” Bucky said, motioning Tony over to sit in the other bowl-shaped chair beside him. The genius didn’t hesitate to accept the invitation, and upon sitting down he looked at the other man in surprise.

“Hey, this chair’s pretty comfy.”

“I know! I’d never seen a chair like it before…but I like ‘em a lot. Peter and Shuri…they’re really thoughtful, huh?”

“They’re good kids.”

“Sure are…” The two men were silent for a few moments before Bucky turned to look at Tony. “Do you know a way I can thank them? I don’t think they realize how…how much this means to me. I…you know…” Bucky paused for a few moments as he tried to think of how to word what he wanted to say. “I know that I don’t…you know…deserve any of this. They thought a lot about this…put in pictures of special people and places…found me a record player… and…” Tony listened patiently as he watched Bucky curl his fingers around the soft pillow in his arms. “I’ve been so cold for so long… when I was awake and off duty, Hydra kept me in some lab. They’d work on me there…never had much clothing on. I remember it being freezing…everything that touched me was metal or leather…everything hurt. When they were done with me, they’d put me back on ice ‘til they needed to thaw me out again. I remember just...just wanting nothing more than a blanket.” Bucky glanced up at Tony as he fiddled with his pillow, a smile spreading across his face before he looked around the room. “And look at this place. Everything is so soft…so warm. Even the rug…feels like I’m walking on a cloud. I just…I never even thought I’d have a bed with a blanket again, let alone someplace like this. I want them to know how much it means to me.” Bucky’s eyes fell back to the pillow in his lap and Tony looked Bucky over, his own hard façade melting away as the usually stoic super soldier opened up to him.

“I think they know. You thanked them about a million times.” He quipped as he curled deeper into the chair. “But even if you hadn’t have said a word, I think they’d know. It was pretty obvious to everyone.”

“You think so?”

“Yeah…it was the first time any of us have seen you smile like that—well, except for Steve, I’m guessing.” Bucky was about to tell Tony that the reason he was smiling so hard wasn’t just excitement about the room makeover, but because the teenagers had made him feel special and loved. However, Bucky remained silent as he thought his words might sound too corny; he would have been mocked if he had ever said anything remotely similar to his pals back in the 40s.  

“I’m glad they know then…I still want to find another way to thank them though.”

“We can keep thinking. I’m a genius, it shouldn’t take long to come up with something.” Tony said with a smirk. Bucky chucked his pillow at Tony's head, and the genius looked at him in surprise. “You’d better watch yourself, Barnes. You don’t want to challenge me; I’ve never lost a pillow fight.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Bucky said, the corners of his lips twitching in amusement. The two men leaned back in their chairs and began to brainstorm ways for Bucky to show his appreciation to the teenagers. They bantered comfortably, and before they realized it, it was already after eleven o’clock.

“So, I’m not going to do anything yet?”

“Exactly. They surprised you, so you can surprise them. I’ll help you plan something whenever Shuri comes to visit.”

“It would be fun to give them a nice surprise…”

“See? And I already gave you some great ideas for surprises they’d enjoy. Told you I’m a genius.” Tony said smugly.

“Yeah, and you never let anyone forget it either.”

“Jealous?”

“You can have the brains. I got the brawn.” Tony looked over Bucky’s arms and chest before conceding with a shrug.

“All right, I’ll give you that one.” Bucky chortled in response as he shifted in his chair. A moment later he cocked his head to the side as he pointed to the bed.

“Tired?”

“Yep. I call the wall.” Tony said as he moved to stand up, stretching slightly before he moved over to the bed, kicking off his slippers as he crawled under the canopy. Bucky moved to turn off the lights near his record player and the fairy lights beside the chairs before sliding into bed. He reached up to turn off the fairy lights above his mattress when he noticed Tony out of the corner of his eye. He hesitated as he glanced at the other man, and though Tony hadn’t said anything, Bucky could see that the man appeared frightened. Bucky suddenly recalled the night before when Tony had intentionally left a light on beside his bed, and he glanced up at the lights before looking down at the man already lying beside him.

“Should I leave these ones on?”

“If they won’t bother you…” Tony said, relief washing over his face.

“They’re fine.” Bucky said as he shifted to lay down. He didn’t ask Tony why he was scared of the dark, and Tony didn’t volunteer the information.

“Good night.” The super soldier said as he shut his eyes.

“Mhmm. Night.” Tony said as his eyes also fell shut. Twenty minutes passed by, and both men had just fallen asleep when a knock at the door startled them from their slumber. Tony squinted in confusion and Bucky looked at Tony as he rubbed his face.

“What was that?” Tony opened his mouth to say that he wasn’t sure, but he didn’t get the chance to speak.

“It’s me, Buck. Can I come in?” The two men looked at each other with widened eyes. Tony couldn’t very well run and hide elsewhere—with Steve’s enhanced hearing, he would definitely be able to hear him.

“Uh…I just got in bed.”

“It’ll only take a second.” Tony and Bucky exchanged a look before Tony rolled his eyes and pressed himself against the wall as he pulled the covers over his head. Bucky threw a pillow over part of Tony and then leaned back against him so that the smaller man was completely hidden from view.

“Sure, Stevie. Come on in.”  

“Hey,” Steve said as he opened the door and peeked inside. “I saw the light from under the door. Didn’t realize you were in bed.”

“Just laid down…was about to turn them off. Everything okay?”

“Yeah, I just wanted to let you know that Natasha helped me sort some stuff out earlier. We should be able to go pick up your social security card tomorrow.”

“Yeah?” Bucky asked, lighting up. Steve grinned.

“Yeah. Hopefully, it won’t take too long after that before we can get your back pay from the government.”

“That’s great, Steve! How long do you think it’ll take?”

“I’m not exactly sure, but hopefully—“ Steve stopped, looking at his friend in concern when the man lurched forward with a yelp of surprise. “You okay?”

“I’m fine. Just a pain in my ass.” Bucky said pointedly. Steve looked at him in bewilderment, but Bucky laughed quickly. “Sorry, Stevie. I’m just really tired. Probably won’t remember much of what we talk about tonight. Mind if we talk in the morning?”

“Sure thing.” The Captain said with a chuckle. “Night, Buck.”

“Night, Steve.” Bucky smiled until the door shut before quickly turning around and pulling the covers off Tony’s head. The two men scowled at one another in silence until they were sure that Steve was out of earshot.

“What the hell was that for?” Bucky hissed, his rear end still sore from where Tony had pinched him.

“I couldn’t breathe!”

“You could have just poked me!”

“I thought a pinch would be more effective.” Tony said with a smirk.

“You’re a child.” Bucky expected Tony to fight back, puzzled when the other man appeared startled before lowering his eyes.  

“I’m sorry.”

“…It’s all right.” Bucky said, still perplexed by Tony’s sudden shift in behavior. “I’m sorry for calling you a child.” Bucky’s apology clearly surprised Tony, but Bucky simply closed his eyes. “Let’s go back to sleep.” Tony said nothing, swallowing thickly as unpleasant memories filled his mind. He had lost count of the times that he had been called a child in a demeaning manner. Both his father and his beloved Pepper had used the remark on more than one occasion—usually when Tony was in a vulnerable position and needed the extra attention. Hearing it from Bucky, who he was still worried about scaring away, had instantly worried him. Tony looked back at the man who was still on his half of the bed.

_“He apologized to me. No one’s ever apologized for calling me a child before…and...he didn’t pull away.”_ Tony thought, the warmth of the man beside him comforting him immensely. _“I guess…I haven’t blown it yet.”_ Relief filled the man as he closed his eyes. Tony soon found himself drifting back off to dreamland, and if he happened to snuggle up against Bucky before sleep took him completely, he knew no one would be the wiser.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for waiting so patiently for last week's chapter! :) My vacation was magical and really helped me feel a lot better. 
> 
> That being said, this chapter really shouldn't have been that late. I've been lacking confidence in my writing lately, and am very paranoid about putting out a bad chapter. The past few chapters have taken me far longer than they normally do to write even though I have them all planned out. I'm not quite sure why that is; you guys have left really sweet comments that have continued to boost my confidence. Hopefully, I can find my groove again and go back to publishing at least two chapters a week. I'll try to finish the next one in a more timely fashion. Anyway, I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter.♥


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everyone really left me the absolute sweetest comments on the last chapter, and I repay you by posting two days late. *facepalms* 
> 
> I promise you all at least one more chapter before next Thursday. You're the best readers and I love you guys. :)

Tony buried his face deeper into his pillow, groaning at the thought of getting out of bed. After a brief moment, the man attempted to roll onto his back, though he found that he could hardly move. Cracking open an eye, Tony realized that his face was not buried in a pillow, but in Bucky’s chest. He also discovered that the reason he had trouble moving was that the super soldier had invaded his side of the bed, pinning him to the tapestry-covered wall behind him. Tony’s eyes wandered up and over the sleeping man’s face briefly before he closed his eyes and dropped his head to Bucky’s shoulder.

“Mornin’.” Tony cracked open an eye and pulled back enough to look at the super soldier—whose eyes were still closed.

“How long have you been awake?”

“Dunno,” Bucky said, his voice thick with sleep. “Maybe ten or fifteen minutes.” Tony raised an eyebrow.

“And yet you’re still halfway on top of me?”

“You’re warm…besides,” Bucky started, finally opening his eyes as his lips curled into a smirk, “didn’t hear you complaining.” Tony rolled his eyes, causing the super soldier to laugh in amusement. “You sleep okay? Bucky asked, finally untangling his limbs from Tony’s. He shifted away to allow the genius more space; Tony half-regretted saying anything.

“Yeah, I can’t remember the last time I had two solid nights of sleep in a row.”

“Me neither.”

“But…maybe we’ll stick to my floor from now on?”

“Probably safer that way. Although, it was kinda funny when you dove under the covers to hide from Steve.” Tony gave the other man an unamused look.

“Funny for you maybe. A lot less funny for the guy who was suffocating.”

“Oh, come on, it was just a blanket.”

“It wasn’t so much the blanket as it was the **_230-pound super soldier on top of the blanket that was crushing my lungs_**.” Bucky laughed at Tony’s theatrics before pushing himself up off the bed.

“All right, you made your point. Just didn’t want Steve to see you…Luckily, you’re nice and small so that wasn’t an issue.” Tony sputtered at Bucky’s remark, wasting no time in sitting up and launching a pillow at the super soldier. Bucky caught the pillow just before it hit his face, lowering it to see Tony smiling smugly in his direction. He tried to scowl at the genius, but it was extremely unconvincing as he could not seem to keep a straight face.

“Don’t smile, Barnes.” Tony challenged, clearly amused by the super soldier’s mock anger.

“Who’s smiling?” Tony raised an eyebrow, watching as Bucky struggled to appear indignant. The harder Bucky tried not to smile, the funnier he found the situation, and within thirty seconds the super soldier fell back onto the bed, doubled over with laughter.

 _“How on earth was I ever scared of him?”_ Tony thought to himself as he watched Bucky’s icy blue eyes sparkle in delight. _“No wonder Steve loves him. Under that scary exterior, he’s a giant Teddy bear_.”

“Thank you, Tony.” The genius shook his head slightly as Bucky’s voice pulled him from his thoughts.

“For…hitting you with a pillow?” Tony asked, genuinely confused at why Bucky was thanking him. The other man rolled his eyes, a soft chuckle escaping his lips as he reached up to run his fingers through his hair.

“No, for not coddling me. You’re the only one who doesn’t do it. Feel like everyone else’s always walkin’ on eggshells around me. Steve and I were always this way before…Tried to rib him yesterday and he just...laughed. Didn’t try and make a wisecrack or anything.”

“Wow…I never thought anyone would actually **_thank me_** for being a smartass.”

“Well, allow me to be the first.” Bucky said as he returned to his feet. “I’ll go down first again?”

“It’s okay,” Tony said with a wave of his hand. “I’m taking Pete out to breakfast before dropping him at May’s for the day.”

“All right. See you later then.” Bucky said before turning to stroll out of the room, swinging his arms as he made his way to the lounge.

* * *

 

Upon hearing the loud clanging of metal, Loki’s eyes darted upwards just in time to see Tony narrowly miss getting his hand caught in his new project. Loki closed the book around his finger as he released a sigh.

“Anthony, why aren’t you wearing gloves?”

“Don’t need ‘em.” Tony muttered, not bothering to look up from his work.

“At this very moment, where are you?”

“Last time I checked, we were in my lab.”

“Are gloves not required in laboratories?”

“Not mine.” Tony said with a shrug.

“You’re positively infuriating.”

“He’s well aware.” Tony’s head snapped up in surprise, a big smile spreading across his face as he saw Rhodey standing in the doorway.

“Rhodey, you’re back!” The genius dropped his work and darted across the room, hugging his best friend tightly.

“Good to see you, Tones.” Rhodey said, rubbing his hand gently over Tony’s back as his eyes settled on Loki. “How long was I gone?” Tony pulled back and gave his friend a questioning look.

“What do you mean?”

“Since when do you let evil gods hang out in your lab?” Tony didn’t need to see Loki sneering behind him to know that Rhodey’s comment upset the prince.

“Oh, turns out Loki’s not evil. We’re also friends now.” The Colonel’s eyebrows shot up, and Loki’s expression instantly softened into a tender smile directed at Tony. “Although I don’t know why I let him in here. You’d think he was my mother with the way he nags me over every little thing.” Tony said as if he didn’t love having someone fuss over him.

“Someone must do it. You clearly have no regard for your own safety.” The genius opened his mouth to protest, but Rhodey spoke first.

“Well, he’s not wrong.” Tony narrowed his eyes at Rhodey who simply chuckled in response. “Listen, Tony, I’m still pretty busy. Got a bunch of paperwork and whatnot to fill out regarding the mission. I just wanted to make sure you’re doing okay. I wasn’t able to listen to the voicemail Peter left me until we touched back down in the States. Nearly had a heart attack, but I called Pepper and she assured me you were fine.”

“Peter scared quite a few people with his calls.” Tony said with a chuckle. “He just got scared and exaggerated things a bit. Was really just a bump on the head.”

“’Just a bump on the head?’ Anthony, You were comatose for over twelve hours and had multiple injuries.”

“Tomayto, tomahto.”  

“You know what? I’m sorry for calling you ‘evil’ a minute ago. You’re clearly a saint for putting up with him.” Rhodey said as he turned to Loki. A smirk curled upon the prince’s lips and Tony rolled his eyes.

“Ha. Ha. I really missed that sense of humor.”

“I know you did.” Rhodey’s face turned serious and he put his hand on Tony’s side, lowering his voice as he leaned in closer. “How are you otherwise?”

“Never better.”

“Never better?” Rhodey asked skeptically. “What about the Soldier?”

“Oh...yeah, we’re cool.”

“I’m sorry, I thought it sounded like you just said you’re cool with the Winter Soldier living here.”

“I am. I mean, the Soldier’s gone. It’s just Bucky that lives here.” Rhodey raised an eyebrow.

“Last time I saw you, you would be on the verge of a panic attack at the mention of the man’s name. Now ‘it’s just Bucky’? Is he one of your new friends too?” Tony sniffed as he recalled waking up in Bucky’s arms that morning.

“Yeah, I guess you could say that.”

“I cannot keep up with you.” Rhodey said as he rubbed his forehead before glancing back to see that Loki had returned to reading his book. “Just be careful, all right?” Rhodey had seen Tony hurt too many times by trusting others; he didn’t want it to happen again.

“Aw, Honey Bear, are you worried about me?” Tony asked with a grin as he moved back to his workbench. The Colonel just shook his head.

“For whatever reason, I seem to be. Try not to give me more to worry about, huh?”

“I can’t give you my word, but I’ll try. Easier said than done sometimes.” Rhodey chuckled at Tony’s words as he moved closer to his friend, reaching out to squeeze his shoulder.

“Better than nothing I guess. I better head out, but call me if you need me, okay?”

“Thanks, Rhodey.”

“Dinner soon?”

“Obviously.” The colonel turned to exit the lab, raising his hand to wave goodbye without turning around. Tony watched his friend leave before glancing in Loki’s direction.

“Do you need something, Anthony?” Loki asked without looking up from the page his eyes were scanning.

“No.”

“Then finish your work.” The genius chuckled as he returned to his project, absentmindedly humming a happy tune as he picked up a screwdriver. 

* * *

 

Bucky crept into Tony’s room just after eleven o’clock that evening, surprised to find the man already struggling to stay awake.

“About time you got here. My body’s getting used to sleeping early.”

“Hey, it’s not my fault Peter was playing video games in the living room until just a few minutes ago.” Bucky said with a chuckle as he slipped onto his side of Tony’s large bed.

“He told me he was going out on patrol an hour ago.”

“Think the kid must’ve gotten sidetracked.”

“Hmm.” Tony responded, his eyes already closing. Bucky glanced at Tony’s nightstand, and upon seeing that the other man’s small light was turned on, he lay down and closed his eyes.

“Miss, Friday. Please turn the lights off.”

“Yes, Sergeant.” The AI responded, her voice softer than usual. Bucky snuggled deep beneath the covers, trying to lose himself in some pleasant memory—an attempt to keep nightmares at bay. He managed to fall asleep quickly, and Bucky got nearly four hours of sleep before he was roused from his slumber by the sound of Tony whimpering beside him.

“Tony?” Bucky asked as he tried to rub the sleep from his eyes. When he received no response, Bucky propped himself up on his elbow, reaching out with his metal arm to gently prod the trembling man. “Tony, wake up.” Bucky shook the man a few times before Tony suddenly jerked upright, his eyes flying open as he gasped for air. “You okay?” The genius recoiled in surprise at the sound of Bucky’s voice, a hand landing on his arc reactor. “You’re safe.” Bucky added quickly as he moved to sit upright. “You’ll be okay…just breathe.” Tony closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around himself, rocking from side to side as he repeatedly squeezed his left arm. Bucky watched helplessly, unsure of how to comfort Tony. A moment later, he watched as the genius laughed unconvincingly before quickly laying back down and turning onto his side so that his back was to Bucky.

“I’ll be fine. Go back to sleep.” Bucky bit his bottom lip but reluctantly obeyed, lying back down against his pillows. He stared at the ceiling for several minutes before a slight movement caused him to turn his head in Tony’s direction. The man noticed Tony’s shoulders shudder, and when he heard the man draw in a shaky breath, Bucky realized that the genius was crying.  

As he stared at Tony’s back, he began to feel a strange sense of déjà vu. Suddenly, fragments of memories from the depths of Bucky’s mind resurfaced; a few of the many memories that had been locked away and forgotten during his time as the Winter Soldier. He recalled fondly how his younger sister used to sneak into bed with him every time that it stormed or she had a nightmare. She would press herself close until Bucky would put his arms around her, and he felt a pang of sadness as he remembered how sweetly she would smile before announcing that she felt better and could go back to sleep.

Bucky swallowed the lump in his throat before slowly reaching out to hook his Vibranium arm around Tony’s waist, pulling the man back against his chest. Tony gasped softly, and Bucky felt the genius become rigid in his arms. Without saying a word, Bucky continued to hold the man, smiling softly into Tony’s hair when he felt the genius practically melt backward into his chest a moment later. Tony sobbed quietly in Bucky’s arms, and though the super soldier was struggling to stay awake, he did not allow himself to doze off until Tony had cried himself back to sleep.

 

* * *

 

The next morning, Tony awoke with a groan, sliding a hand up to press against his throbbing head. He opened his eyes halfway, groggily looking around.

“Bucky?”

Silence. Tony pushed himself into an upright position and rubbed his swollen eyes before leaning to look in the direction of his bathroom; the door was open. Tony glanced at his alarm clock to see that the time read just after eight. He frowned to himself before he glanced up toward his ceiling.

“Fri, is Bucky in the lounge?”

“No, Boss.”

“His room?”

“Sergeant Barnes left the tower about thirty minutes ago.”

“He left the tower? He rarely leaves…” Tony sighed and shook his head before slowly sinking beneath the covers, suddenly feeling embarrassed.   _“He…he held me. Aside from Peter, no one’s ever comforted me like that. Bucky feels so safe…and I had to go and ruin it. He’s gone because of last night! Even the nicest guys have their limits. I must have scared him away like I do everyone else…How many people are you going to run off before you get it through your thick skull that no one wants to hang around a weak Iron Man? What an oxymoron that is!”_

After a few more moments of self-rebuke, Tony slid out of bed, pinching the bridge of his nose as he dragged himself into the bathroom.

_“Welp, sleeping with Bucky was nice while it lasted.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It was a short, but very sweet, chapter. I want to give both Bucky and Tony all the hugs in the world.


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're over 100,000 words now, and chapter 30 will be out on Thursday! Can't believe we made it this far already. Thanks to everyone who has made it this far in the story :)

Tony had spent the entire day in his lab with Peter and Bruce, the three of them bouncing ideas off of one another as they worked on their individual projects. The billionaire became so absorbed in his work that he didn’t even realize how late it had gotten until he felt Peter poke his side.

“Can I help you?” Tony asked as he glanced at the teenager.

“You could start listening to me.”

“Huh?”

“I just asked you like three times what we’re gonna have for dinner?” Tony blinked rapidly, his eyes shifting to Bruce when he heard the other genius chuckle softly.

“Might wanna take a break for the night, Tony. We’ve been working pretty hard today.”

“I’m fine.” Tony replied with a shrug, enjoying the distraction. However, his face softened as he looked at Peter. “I guess I could use a break though… what are you guys thinking for dinner tonight?”

“It’s just going to be you two. Thor’s dragging Loki and me out tonight. He’s very gung ho about trying sushi.” Bruce said, sounding slightly exasperated. Both Peter and Tony laughed as the other scientist shook his head while glancing down at his watch. ”I should probably head out. I’ll see you guys in the morning.”

“Dr. Banner, take a video of Thor trying sushi!” Peter said and Bruce chuckled.

“I’ll try to remember.”

“Bye, Brucie!” Tony called as he watched the doctor exit his lab. As the door began to close, Tony’s eyes shifted back to Peter.

“All right, kid. What do you want?”

“I’m fine with anything. You can pick!”

“Nope. Summer is the time when pesky kids get to eat whatever they want. Your choice.”

“Hmm…honestly, I just want to eat like five peanut butter and jelly sandwiches before I go out on patrol.”

“Peanut butter and jelly?”

“Yeah, but you should order something! I know you probably don’t want that.” Tony shook his head quickly.

“I haven’t had peanut butter and jelly in years. It sounds perfect. I think we have the stuff for that on our floor.”

“We do. Friday keeps it stocked for me.” Peter said smugly, causing Tony to chuckle as he threw his arm over the teen’s shoulder.

“Think she’s got a soft spot for you, Kid.” Peter grinned as he and Tony entered the elevator and went back up to their floor. The two of them worked together to make several sandwiches, Tony spreading the peanut butter on half of the bread while Peter spread the jelly on the other half. Once the sandwiches were finished, Peter carried them to the table while Tony retrieved the milk from the refrigerator. Though the meal was a simple one, Tony enjoyed it more than he realized he would—though that could also have been attributed to his dining companion. The pair spent nearly two hours talking about anything and everything before Peter gasped in surprise when he saw the time on his phone.

“Oh, no! It’s getting late. I’d better go get ready to go on patrol.” Tony wanted to protest, but he refused to ruin Peter’s evening due to his own selfish agenda.

“Yeah, you get going. I’ll clean up.”

“No, I can help you clean up first—“ Peter started, though his mentor did not let him finish.

“Nope, I’m cleaning. I’ll take care of the kitchen, you take care of the city.”

“Okay!” The young hero turned to leave, halfway out of the kitchen before he turned around and walked back to Tony, quickly kissing the man’s cheek. Tony looked up in surprise before a warm smile spread across his face.

“What was that for?”

“Just felt like it. See ya later, Tony!” Peter chirped cheerfully before he turned to skip out of the kitchen. Tony touched his cheek, a happy sigh escaping his lips as the man returned to his task of cleaning the kitchen. Whether intentional or not, Peter always seemed to lift Tony’s spirits just when the man needed it most.

It only took about fifteen minutes to clean up the mess from dinner, and once he was finished, the genius noted that it was still before nine o’clock. With a groan, the man rubbed his sore neck as he shuffled into his bathroom with the intention of taking an extremely long, hot shower. Almost an hour later, Tony emerged from the bathroom dressed in his favorite flannel pants and an old t-shirt. The man plopped onto his bed and grabbed his Starkpad before running his fingers through his damp curls, absentmindedly pushing the hair off his forehead as he began to read through his emails. Only twenty minutes passed before Tony’s eyelids grew heavy and he found himself fighting off sleep.

 _“Damn it…who knew I’d get used to sleeping so quickly?”_ He thought as he slid under the covers. Tony lay the Starkpad on the bed and rolled onto his side before gently hitting his cheek. _“Come on, Tony. Don’t fall asleep. Not after that doozy of a nightmare you had last night.”_ Suddenly, Tony heard a sound behind him and he quickly turned around to see Bucky opening his bedroom door.

“It’s not even eleven yet. Rough day?” Bucky asked with a chuckle as he shut the door behind himself. Tony stared at the man in surprise as Bucky casually strolled over to the bed.

“What are you doing here?” The super soldier raised an eyebrow at Tony’s question, cocking his head to the side.

“Did you forget that I sleep here?”

“Well, no…”

“Then what’re you asking me why I’m here for?”

“Um…no reason.” Tony said before quickly changing the subject. “Where were you all day?” Bucky sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing the nape of his neck as he exhaled deeply.

“Trying to get my back pay. Steve helped me get a copy of my social security card. We went bright and early down to the department of labor…we waited around forever. They finally talk to us and tell us they can’t help with gettin’ my back pay. They told us to try talking to someone at Fort Hamilton. So we get all the way over there and they tell us we shouldn’t have been sent there and that we needed to go to Veteran Affairs. They give us directions and we head out to that office. We get there and wait around for a while. Finally, they got around to helpin’ us. Well, no one really knew what to do. Guess it’s not normal for someone to survive being a POW for seventy years and then show up to collect his back pay.” Bucky said with a snort. “Anyway, they end up calling the head of the department. He comes over to help us out—we finally get someone who seems to know what he’s talking about…and then he says that he’ll help in any way he can, but that he’s not sure how long it will take for me to get my money. **_If_** I get it at all. He’s dealt with soldiers collecting back pay, but never for the amount I’m owed. He said it could take months before I’m paid and I’ll probably just get small payments monthly instead of a lump sum—“

“That’s bullshit!” Tony said as he propped himself up on his side, his sudden anger momentarily causing him to forget his exhaustion.

“I know…but what can I do about it? At least I’d get a little money until I can hopefully find a job.” Bucky said with a shrug of resignation.

“Uh, no. I have the best damn lawyers in the State. We’ll have them figure this out.”

“No, I don’t wanna do that.”

“Why not?

“Lawyers back in my day weren’t cheap, and I’m guessing that’s still true now.”

“That doesn’t matter.” Tony said with a dismissive wave of his hand.

“I’m not using your lawyers, Tony.” The genius frowned, his brows knitting together as he looked at Bucky.

“Why won’t you let me help you?”

“It’s not that much of a hassle—“

“You have no money! This whole thing wouldn’t be as big of a deal if you’d just use the card I gave you, but I know that you haven’t bought so much as a stick of gum with it. You still don’t have a phone and you’re wearing all of Steve’s old clothes. Why aren’t you letting me help you? Aren’t we friends?” Tony asked in frustration, his own insecurity getting the better of him.

“Sure we are, why would you ask that?”

“Then why won’t you let me help you?”

“Because we’re friends.” Tony squinted as he tilted his head to the side.

“Come again?”

“You help me plenty of other ways. More than I deserve. You let me live here and eat your food, you helped me when my arm was busted, you treat me like I’m a normal person — unlike the rest of the world… and you somehow forgave me for what I did as the Soldier…” Bucky lowered his eyes, unable to look at Tony when he thought about what the Soldier had done to the man’s parents. “I don’t need your money too.”

“Bucky, do you know how much money I have? You could go out and spend a few million dollars and I wouldn’t even notice. It’s not a big deal…don’t worry about it.”

“I know that…but I want you to know that you can trust me.”

“Uh, not quite sure how those two things correlate.”

“That night when we first started talking…Y’know, after you got hurt? You said that you’re convenient to have around so sometimes you’re not sure who your real friends are. The way I see it, if I don’t use your money or connections, you have no reason to think I’m pretending to like you.” Tony froze, staring at Bucky in stunned silence. After a moment, the genius licked his lips before he began to speak, his voice slightly higher than usual.

“You mean… you’re not using that card so that I know you like me for…me? And not for my money?”

“Well, yeah. Makes sense, right?”

“I…yeah. I guess…it does.” Tony said, still in shock.

“Good. Guess that’s settled then.” Bucky said as he slid underneath the covers. Tony was silent for several moments, and Bucky cast a concerned glance in his direction.

“I wish you’d still use my lawyers.”

“Tony…”

“Just listen. I pay them to be on call at all hours of the day—a big corporation like mine might need a lawyer at any time. That means I pay them to do an awful lot of nothing on some days. You’re not really using my money if you let my lawyers help you—I have to pay them either way.”

“Yeah? I don’t know, Tony…I don’t really mind getting smaller amounts every—“

“Nope, I just decided. You no longer have any say in anything related to your back pay. From now on, it’s all on my lawyers…They’re just lucky I’m too tired to call them up until the morning.” Tony added with a grumble as he closed his eyes, causing Bucky to laugh softly. The former assassin looked over the man beside him, wondering why on earth such a kind man was friends with the likes of him, when he realized that it was his first time seeing Tony’s hair unstyled.

 _“Huh. He looks a lot younger with his hair on his face like that…”_ Bucky noticed that Tony’s pillow was wet and he squinted as he reached out to touch one of the curls forming around Tony’s temple. _“He’s not actually sleeping with wet hair, is he?”_

“Whatcha doing?” Bucky looked down to see Tony looking up at him with one eye open.

“Your hair’s wet.”

“Excellent observation, Sherlock.”

“You’ll get sick if you sleep with wet hair.”

“The only way I’ll get sick tonight is if you cough on me… so try not to do that.” Tony closed his eye and Bucky pressed his lips together.

“You really should dry your hair.”

“That’s an old wives’ tale.”

“I think…” Bucky stopped speaking as Tony opened both eyes and moved a bit closer, studying him carefully before reaching out to touch his flesh arm.

“What are you doing?”

“You’re nagging me so much that I thought you might actually be Loki in disguise. Your skin is much too warm though.” Bucky crinkled his nose and pulled away, causing Tony to snicker as he put his head back onto his pillow. “I’m too tired, okay? I’ll take my chances.”

“…Geez, I’ll dry it for ya.” Bucky said, shaking his head in exasperation as he kicked off the covers. “Where are your towels?”

“Shut up and get back in bed.”

“Are you going to get up and dry your hair?”

“No.”

“Then tell me where your damn towels are.”

“This is ridiculous.” Tony muttered before glancing up at the super soldier. “And this is the twenty-first century. Use a hair dryer.”

“You have one of those?” Bucky’s eyes grew large, “ The small kind?”

“In the bathroom. Middle drawer.” Bucky headed off to look for it and Tony buried his face into his pillow.

“Wow, it’s so small!” Bucky exclaimed in surprise as he walked out of the bathroom with the tool in his hand.

“That’s what she said.” Tony mumbled into his pillow.

“Huh?”

“Nothing…come on, let’s just go to sleep.” Tony said as he turned his head slightly to glance up at Bucky.

“After I dry your hair. Sit up.”

“Hell no. I don’t even want my hair dried.”

“Fine, I’ll dry it with you lying down.” Bucky said as he found an electrical socket near the bed to plug the dryer into. “Never thought I’d meet anyone who could rival Steve’s stubbornness,” Bucky mumbled under his breath as he climbed back onto the bed.

“What’d you say?”

“Nothing.” Bucky said as he turned on the hairdryer. The amount of power coming from the small machine amazed him, and he ran it over Tony’s hair, moving it from side to side so as not to burn the man’s scalp. In about five minutes, Tony’s hair was completely dry, and Bucky turned off the dryer. “Wow, this is amazing! Can I borrow this tomorrow?” When he didn’t receive a response, Bucky looked down at his friend, realizing that the genius was asleep.

“He wasn’t kidding about being tired.” The super soldier thought as he put the hair dryer onto the nightstand beside him. He reached over Tony to flick on the man’s nightlight before lying down on his side of the bed.

“Miss Friday—“ Before he could ask the AI to turn off the lights, they were already fading. Bucky chuckled as he closed his eyes. “Thank you, Doll.”

“Pleasant dreams, Sergeant Barnes.”

* * *

 

Bucky awoke with a start, his heart beating rapidly inside his chest. He lay completely motionless, drawing in a ragged breath before slowly opening his eyes.

 _“Where are they?”_ He thought as he stared at the ceiling. _“I hate when they leave me in the dark. The waiting is the worst. I wish they’d just kill me already.”_ A chill went up Bucky’s spine and he tried his best to refrain from shivering—he had learned all too well that disobeying orders to stay still would never bode well for him. A single tear slide down his cheek. Another soon followed, and before he knew it, tears were streaming down his face. The super soldier closed his eyes in an attempt to stop crying, keeping his shaky breaths uncomfortably shallow so as not to draw attention to himself in the event that any of Hydra’s scientists were monitoring him nearby. Suddenly, Bucky caught the sound of someone breathing beside him. Paralyzed with fear, his own breath caught in his throat. He squeezed his eyes shut and swallowed thickly, bracing himself for the pain that he was sure would follow. When he felt nothing, the super soldier gathered all of his courage and cautiously opened his eyes. He tried to make out the dark shapes in the dimly lit room, his brow furrowing in confusion.

 _“Wait…this isn’t the lab…where am I?”_ Noticing light out of the corner of his eye, Bucky turned his head to the side, blinking rapidly to clear his blurry vision. His eyes fell on Tony, and as he stared at the man, his mind was effectively pulled from the hypnopompic hallucination he had been experiencing.

Now fully conscious, Bucky began to cry softly as he snuggled deeper beneath the warm blankets on Tony’s bed. He gripped a fleece blanket tightly as he curled his toes against the soft sheets, trying to soak in as many of the comforting sensory pleasures he had been deprived of as the Winter Soldier. After a moment, he scooted closer to Tony, reaching out for the man who had unwittingly become his solace. Bucky’s metal hand stopped short of Tony’s waist before he pulled it back and looked down at it in disgust; He didn’t deserve the man’s comfort.

The super soldier trembled as he shifted away from Tony, sniffling as he reached up to wipe his eyes. Bucky struggled to remain calm but found himself hyperventilating only moments later. In his distress, he quickly reached out—this time with his flesh hand—grabbing Tony’s hand and holding it tightly in his own.

 _“Maybe holding his hand isn’t too much…”_ Bucky hoped to himself as he attempted to take deeper breaths, the warmth of Tony’s hand grounding him enough to bring him down from his panic attack. Bucky knew that he should let go of Tony’s hand and go back to sleep. Instead, he kept a vice-like grip on it and lay awake, terrified that he may experience another hallucination if he fell back asleep. Bucky had been awake for over an hour and a half when Tony began to stir in his sleep. Unsure if the other man was having a nightmare, Bucky decided not to wake him up. Tony soon calmed down, which is why the genius startled Bucky when he suddenly bolted upright with a loud gasp a few moments later. Tony put a hand on his chest and closed his eyes as he tried to steady his breathing.

“You okay?” The genius’ head snapped to the side, surprised to Bucky looking up at him.

“I’m fine.” He said though he was nursing his left arm—something Bucky had come to realize Tony only did when he was upset. “Better than last night anyway.” As Tony’s eyes adjusted to the lighting, it became very apparent to him that Bucky had been crying—for quite a while judging from how swollen his eyes were.

“How long have you been awake?”

“Dunno…a while.” Tony looked down at the man’s hand awkwardly stretched out in his direction. He thought back to a few moments earlier before tilting his head to the side.

“Were you holding my hand?”

“…I’m sorry.” Tony rubbed his eyes tiredly before furrowing his brow. Without saying a word, Tony lay back down. However, he did not lay where he had been laying previously. Instead, he moved closer to the super soldier, laying his head on half of Bucky’s pillow as he curled into the other man’s chest—exactly the way Peter would sleep with him. Bucky looked down with widened eyes for a moment before cuddling as close to Tony as he possibly could. Believing that he was back at Hydra—if only for a few minutes—had absolutely petrified Bucky. It had also reminded him of all the heinous crimes the Winter Soldier had been forced to commit. All of the feelings of guilt and worthlessness had clawed their way back to the forefront of Bucky’s mind in no time at all. However, the simple act of Tony curling up against him caused some of those feelings to disappear back into the recesses of his mind.

_“If Tony thinks I deserve this…maybe...maybe I do…”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have so many feelings about Tony and Bucky at this point that I don't even know what to do with myself.


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is over 7,000 words, so please don't be too upset at me for not updating last week. Also please see the chapter notes at the end of this chapter to read an announcement AND to see some ADORABLE fanart that a lovely reader, viviixen, made for chapter 26. ♥

“You’re still at it?” Bucky asked as he walked out of Tony’s bathroom, a damp towel around his neck. Tony huffed and turned away from the mirror, pointing a comb in Bucky’s direction.

“This is all your fault! Blow drying my hair without my products made it way too curly. Forgot how stubborn my damn hair can be when it’s not tamed.”

“Looks fine to me,” Bucky said with a shrug. “Also, **_you’re welcome_** for drying your hair so you didn’t catch a cold.”

“I was too tired to argue last night, but there are just so many scientific inaccuracies with that theory,” Tony said as he turned back to the mirror. “I know Shuri and Pete are getting you all kinds of caught up on memes or whatever it is the kids like these days, but you need to get caught up on more important things…like how it’s impossible to catch a cold from sleeping with wet hair!”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure. If you don’t believe me, I’ll take you down to my lab after breakfast and let you look through some of the biology books I have down there.”

“…Do I have to go to your lab?” Tony stopped combing his hair, glancing at Bucky out of the corner of his eye. The larger man looked frightened at the thought of setting foot into a laboratory; Tony could have kicked himself.

“No…I’ll bring a few books up here. You can look through them tonight.” Bucky visibly relaxed, causing Tony to smile. That is until he caught sight of his reflection in the mirror once again. “I give up. I’ll just have to re-wash my hair. Nothing can fix this mess.”

“Give it to me,” Bucky said as he walked up to Tony and held his hand out for the comb.

“You think you can fix it?”

“I know I can.” Tony raised an eyebrow before handing the comb to Bucky.

“All right, Hotshot, give it a whirl.” Tony stood still, watching the other man’s face as he began to comb through his hair. Bucky finished within a matter of moments, handing the comb back to Tony as he gave a satisfied nod.

“You look handsome.”

“I always look handsome,” Tony replied, causing Bucky to chuckle.

“What do you think?” Bucky asked, having finished combing Tony’s wavy hair into a side-swept style à la Cary Grant. Tony turned back to the mirror, flinching when he saw his reflection. He quickly mussed his hair as he shook his head.

“Nope.”

“Tony!”

“I hate it.” Tony glanced at Bucky, immediately regretting his choice of words as he caught a glimpse of his friend’s crestfallen expression. “You did a great job…not your fault it made me look like Howard.”

“… I know that you said you and Howard weren’t exactly close…but why do you always refer to him by name?” Bucky asked, finally working up the nerve to ask the question he’d been curious about for a while. Tony was taken aback, suddenly glad that Bucky could not meet his eyes when speaking about his parents.

“Let’s just say he was never nominated for any ‘father of the year’ awards.” Tony sniffed as he looked back up at Bucky, suddenly chuckling as if talking about his father was a pleasant experience. “All right, I’m going to re-wash my hair. Why don’t you dry yours while I do that? Wouldn’t want you to catch a cold now, would we?” Bucky narrowed his eyes at Tony, playfully shoving him toward the bathroom.

“All right, Smartypants, hurry up and wash your hair.” Tony laughed as he hurried back to the bathroom. Bucky watched him, his smile fading once the other man was out of view.

_“What did Howard do to him?”_

* * *

 

“You sure it’s okay if we go down to breakfast together?” Bucky asked as they stepped into the elevator.

“Sure, it’ll be fine once in a while. Steve’s floor is between mine and the lounge so it’s not suspicious.” Tony said flippantly as the elevator began to move. “Oh, and I forgot to tell you that I called my lawyers while you were in the shower. They’re already looking into your back pay.” Bucky rubbed the back of his neck as he shook his head.

“Gee, Tony…are you sure it’s okay? I really don’t know how I can ever pay you back—“

“Stop it. We’re friends. None of this ‘paying back’ crap.” As the doors to the elevator opened onto the lounge, Bucky watched as Tony’s gentle demeanor transformed into the snarky expression for which the man was known. Bucky envied the man’s acting abilities; he wished that he could hide the anxiety he felt when everyone was gathered together. “Good Morning!” Tony called out as he headed toward the kitchen. Peter popped out from around the corner, a pink frosted donut in hand.

“I ordered donuts! Sam wanted to hide all the original glazed from you, but I didn’t let him.”

“Snitches get stitches, Kid!” Though Tony knew Sam was joking, he lunged forward and wrapped an arm protectively around Peter, pulling the teen to his chest as he playfully glared into the kitchen.

“What’d you say to my kid?”

“You heard me.” Tony opened his mouth to respond but was interrupted by Peter.

“This snitch wouldn’t need stitches. I have accelerated healing, remember? Besides, I don’t think you could actually hurt me if you wanted to.” Sam narrowed his eyes at Peter.

“Is that a challenge?”

“If you want it to be.” Sam continued to eye Peter for a few moments before he looked back at Tony.

“Damn, Stark. The kid’s been hanging around you for too long. Starting to get a mouth on him.”

“My sass is rubbing off on you, huh, Kid?” Tony asked proudly.

“Guess so! Now go sit down and I’ll get you coffee and a donut…You too, Bucky.” Peter said with a warm smile as he noticed the other man watching quietly from just outside the kitchen. Tony squeezed Peter’s shoulder as he moved to sit beside Loki, and Bucky stepped into the kitchen, moving into an empty chair beside Steve.

“Morning, Buck! You sleep well?”

“Yeah.” He responded, visibly relaxing as he saw his friend’s smiling face. “How ‘bout you?”

“Like a baby. Anyway, why don’t we eat quickly? I thought we could go back over to Veteran Affairs and—“

“It’s all right, Steve, we don’t need to go back.” When his friend looked confused, Bucky elaborated. “Tony said his lawyers are going to take care of it.” Steve’s eyebrows shot up as he cast a sidelong glance at the billionaire, who was laughing at something that Loki had said.

“Tony’s helping you?”

“Yep.”

“I didn’t realize you two even talked.”

“Yeah… we’re friends now.”

“Here’s your coffee!” Peter interrupted as he set a mug in front of Bucky before holding out an open box of donuts. “What kinda donut you want?” Bucky’s eyes immediately settled on a chocolate donut with rainbow sprinkles and he pointed at it as he looked up at Peter.

“Is that chocolate?”

“Sure is.”

“Could I…have that one?”

“Of course you can!” Peter leaned closer and lowered his voice. “My pink donuts are in the box by the toaster. You can have as many as you want!” Bucky grinned excitedly as he grabbed the chocolate donut.

“Can I eat it right in front of Sam?” He asked as he glanced in the other man’s direction. Peter also looked at Sam, snickering as he imagined the man’s reaction.

“Yes, please.”

“Hey! Why are you two laughing while you look at me?”

“We aren’t!’ Peter said as both he and Bucky giggled. Steve also chuckled and Sam threw up his hands.

“C’mon, Steve. Not you too!”

“It’s hard not to eavesdrop when you have enhanced hearing.”

“What were they talking ab—“ Sam was cut off by the sound of an alarm, and everyone in the kitchen froze.

“What’s going on, Friday?” Tony asked.

“Director Fury requires all Avengers at the Empire State building immediately. It seems someone has called in a bomb threat.” Everyone exchanged a look as Tony set his coffee back onto the table with a loud thud.

“All right, Everyone. Let’s roll.” Loki and Bucky, both aware that they were not part of the mission did not move. Peter, on the other hand, stood up with the rest of the Avengers.

“Just where do you think you’re going?” Tony asked the teenager with a raised brow.

“With you.”

“Maybe next time, Kid.”

“I’m going with you.”

“Peter…”

“Tony, please. Please? I need to go this time. You know I’m good in a fight.” Peter’s eyes were filled with fear, and Tony’s heart wrenched because he knew that what was causing Peter to be frightened had nothing to do with bombs or bad guys.

“Ask Cap.” He said softly. Peter whirled around just in time to see Steve following Natasha out of the kitchen.

“Captain Rogers!” Peter called out as he dashed after the hero, grabbing a hold of his arm. “Please let me come.”

“We don’t exactly know who or what we’re dealing with, Peter…”

“Please, Cap,” Peter said, his voice softening to a whisper. “I promise I’ll follow orders. You fought me before; you know I can handle it…if Tony gets hurt, I want to be there for him…” Steve faltered, not wanting to bring a child to a fight, but also not sure how he could deny Peter’s request. After all, Steve was well aware that Peter was physically stronger than himself. He glanced at Natasha, who gave him a single nod, before releasing a deep sigh.

“You can come, but don’t make the same mistake I did. You stick with your partner. God forbid Tony does get hurt, you don’t go to him until it’s clear.”

“Yes, Sir.” Steve smiled and gave Peter's shoulder a squeeze.

“Go suit up, Kid.”

* * *

 

“No sign of a bomb yet, but we haven’t finished combing the building. We’ve managed to rope off about two city blocks and we have agents checking the surrounding area in case the bomb isn’t actually in the building itself.” Fury said as the Avengers arrived at the Empire State building. Tony scanned the scene before looking back at the Shield Director.

“Not that I’m unwilling to help, but I thought you said something about a disturbance? This just seems like a job for the bomb squad.

“Well, I’m hoping we won’t need you, but I wasn’t taking any chances. The person who called in the threat made it very clear that if we attempted to find and disarm the bomb, they would send out their army.”

“Whoa, cool. We’re going to fight an army? Are they aliens?” Peter asked as he stepped out from behind Tony. Fury stared at the masked boy before looking at Tony.

“Really?”

“Steve was the one who said he could come,” Tony said quickly, causing the Captain to roll his eyes.

“Fury, we found it,” Maria said as she quickly walked up to the director. “It’s on the third floor. There’s enough dynamite to cause severe structural damage should it be set off. The bomb squad is taking a look at it now.”

“Good. Have the other agents start evacuating nearby buildings and finish clearing the area. I don’t want anyone within a one block radius.”

“Yes, Sir,” Maria said as she pressed on her earpiece, starting to give orders as she scurried away.

“So…what now? We’re supposed to just stand around here looking pretty in case this supposed army shows up?”

“Yes, Stark. You’re going to stand right there and look like the prettiest damn motherfu—“A round of bullets was suddenly fired in their direction and the heroes jumped into action.

“Shots came from the top of that building,” Steve said as Tony’s nanotech helmet instantly covered his head.

“I’m on it. Thor back me up?”

“I’m right behind you.” Tony took off, firing one of his blasters at the snipers as Thor followed behind, dark clouds immediately rolling into the sky. Another onslaught of bullets had the remaining Avengers diving for cover as Steve scanned the buildings behind them.

“Top of the brick building at two o’clock. Wanda, Vision take care of them. Sam, I want you in the air. Keep an eye out for anything we can’t see from the ground.” As Steve gave the orders, a slew of masked assailants emerged from several different alleyways carrying a variety of different weapons. All right, the rest of us on the ground. Let’s go.” Peter shot a web onto the side of the Empire State Building using it to swing himself full force into a small group of attackers. Natasha used Peter’s distraction to kick the gun out of a man’s hand before flipping him onto the ground. Steve threw his shield like a Frisbee, effectively knocking out two opponents with the Vibranium disk before it returned to his hand. Hulk smashed two men onto the ground before walking straight up to a man who was shooting at him and bent the barrel of his gun.

“Tony, Thor, it looks like you’re going to have more company on the roof,” Sam said before he looked to the other side of the building. “Wanda, Vision, think you’re clear after you finish up with those guys. There’s too many on the ground, I’m going down to help. Holler if you need eyes in the sky again.”

“We’ll handle this,” Thor said as his eyes glowed and streaks of lighting surged over his body. The God of Thunder slammed his fist into the nearest enemy, causing the man to fly backward and slam into his comrades with such force that all of them ended up flying off of the rooftop.

“Well, mark me down as scared **_and_** horny.” Thor turned to smirk at Tony.

“EWW, Mr. Stark!” Peter protested; Tony had momentarily forgotten his microphone was on.

“Wait…why am I ‘Mr. Stark’?”

“I try to teach you hundreds of memes and **_that’s_** the one you remember?”

“ ** _Why am I ‘Mr. Stark’?_** ”

“Because I’m—Ow! Hey, that’s not nice!—I’m a little distracted here. Whoa, watch where you swing that knife!” Tony’s head snapped around, his heartbeat quickening as he saw the number of enemies on the ground. When he heard men clamoring up the fire escape, his attention turned back to the roof and he cracked his neck as he held up his blasters.

“Thor, go help on the ground.”

“I’m not leaving you alone.”

“I can handle these guys by myself.” Thor didn’t move, and Tony blasted the first man to appear on the roof, watching as he toppled backward onto his allies. “Thor, it’s different this time! I’m aware I won’t have backup. Get on the ground **_now_**.” The god glanced at the battle happening at the base of the Empire State building.

“Don’t be afraid to call me, Tony.”

“ ** _GO!_** ” Thor jumped off of the roof and Tony flipped off his the microphone to his communication device as he continued to use his blasters to fight off his opponents. One man managed to slip past Tony’s blast and dove forward in an attempt to tackle him. Though Tony jumped back to avoid being knocked over, the man did grab hold of his leg long enough to distract him. Soon, others had made it to the roof in one piece and Tony found himself engaging in hand-to-hand combat with several men.

 _“Jab. Jab. Throat punch. Uppercut. Long Knee.”_ Tony chanted the name of each move in his head as he performed it, looking for any opening he had to use his blasters.

“You’ll need a new technique, Boss. There are more men approaching the roof.” Friday’s voice interrupted Tony’s thoughts and he turned to see that more men were indeed swarming up to the top of the roof, no longer held back by his blasters. In the brief second that he looked away, one of the men managed to get Tony into a chokehold. Tony flipped the man onto his back with ease and straightened up, blocking another attack in the process.

One thing Tony noted was that the army itself wasn’t particularly skilled. Despite the lack of skill, the seemingly endless amount of soldiers were beginning to drain his energy. _“I just need to get back far enough that I can take out a good chunk of them with one blast.”_ He thought to himself as he raised his foot to kick someone in the stomach. He pulled back and raised his blasters, only taking out two of his assailants. “I did **_not_** rewash my hair this morning so that I could get helmet hair!” Tony yelled in annoyance as he elbowed another attacker in the face. The hero spun around, arms out to the side to blast the men closing in on him. He swung his leg out to deliver a swift kick to the man behind him, looking down in confusion when his leg cracked against a pillar of ice. “What the…” Tony found that the enemies immediately surrounding him had all been encased in ice, and he looked up just in time to see the God of Mischief use a large blast of energy to bring down a majority of the other assailants. “Loki!”

“Hello, Anthony,” Loki said, a mischievous grin playing on his lips.

“How did you…?”

“Sergeant Barnes and I were watching the news. You seemed a bit outnumbered.”

“I had it under control.”

“Did you now? Well, I am terribly sorry to have spoiled your fun. Shall I unfreeze these men so that you can play more?” Tony huffed and shook his head.

“If we’re on the news, you shouldn’t be here. That’s part of your agreement with the people on earth. They see you using magic and they might get scared, Loki.”

“Let them be scared.”

“How can you be so flippant about this?”

“I’m not letting you get hurt again, Anthony.” Tony clenched his jaw tightly, grateful for the helmet shielding his face from view. He blinked rapidly as he switched his microphone back on.

“We cleared the roof and we’re coming down to help.”

“We?” He heard Steve’s voice ask in confusion.

“Loki’s here as backup.”

“…Tony.”

“I didn’t invite him, but we need the help.” No other words were exchanged as he and Loki jumped over the side of the roof to join the battle. After several gruelling minutes, the heroes finally began to make a dent in the army. Some enemies fell, many attempted to flee, though most were caught by SHIELD agents near the perimeter. Fury’s voice was heard over the speakers

“Fifteen minutes until the bomb is set to go off. Status report.”

“Fight’s pretty much over. They’re scattering.” Steve replied.

“Good. We evacuated about a block and a half out. We have agents covering the entire perimeter. They won’t get far.”

“Bomb squad still hasn’t diffused the bomb?” Tony asked.

“They’re the best, they’ll finish it. I want you all to meet me on the south end of the perimeter. Now.”

“Yes, Sir,” Steve said as he began to lead the Avengers away from the area. Tony, who knew that the bomb squad must be having trouble, fell to the back of the group before slipping away, disappearing into the skyscraper. He headed straight to the third floor, pushing the arc reactor enough to remove only the helmet of his suit. When he arrived on the third floor, Tony found six technicians staring at the bomb nervously.

“What’s going on here?” The men looked up in surprise. Tony looked equally surprised when he caught sight of the bomb.

“That’s a big one.” He said as he let out a low whistle. “Look at all that dynamite…so, why are we just sitting here staring at it?” The technicians were silent for several moments until one of them finally cleared his throat and pointed to the detonator.

“It’s unlike anything we’ve ever seen.” Tony took a step closer and shook his head.

“Someone’s been watching too many movies. They got an old alarm clock as a timer and everything.”

“That’s just it—the bomb looks like something from an ‘80s movie… but if you look closer…” He pointed at a small button and Tony knelt down to get a better look.

“Pressure sensors?”

“Yep. And see the casing? The wires for the pressure sensors go straight into it with all of the other wires. Then it was all duct taped closed. We can’t tell how to disarm it without opening the casing—“

“And you can’t open the casing because the amount of pressure from removing the duct tape would set it off,” Tony said in realization.

“That’s right.” Tony stared at the bomb for several moments before looking back to the young technicians.

“Get out of here.”

“Wha—“

“You all look pretty young, but you’re old enough to remember what Stark Industries was in the business of before we switched to clean energy. I’m familiar enough with this…if it were to go off, it will bring down the entire building for sure. Right now Fury has the perimeter at a block and a half radius around the building. Go out there and tell him to expand it to two full blocks.”

“But—“

“Which one of us in the Iron Man suit? I’ll be fine.” Tony said; though he knew the chances of surviving the blast of such a large amount of dynamite were slim to none—even with the suit. Hurry up! We have twelve minutes, and I’m going to start tinkering with the bomb in ten.” The young technicians scrambled to their feet and started to head out the door. As an afterthought, Tony grabbed the arms of the last two men who were about to leave the room. “Spiderman’s going to want to come in here. Don’t let him set foot past the perimeter or you’ll wish you had been in here when the bomb went off.” Their eyes grew large as Tony shoved the men out the door without a second thought. He moved back over to the bomb, scanning it for any imperfections.

 _“Strange…I wonder what’s with all the show."_ Tony sat back and hugged his knees to his chest. He swallowed the lump he felt in his throat, realizing that the odds of him being alive in fifteen minutes were almost non-existent. Tony started to have a panic attack, trying to calm himself as he drew in a shaky breath.

“Friday?”

“Yes, Boss.”

“Record. I want to make an amendment to my will in the event that I don’t survive this.”

“Yes, Sir. Will it be a large change?”

“No. Not really; the new beach house in Miami, home in London, and powder blue Cadillac still go to Pepper. Rhodey gets the Ferrari and half of my stock portfolio. Happy gets the other half and the Rolls Royce. The Avengers get the tower in addition to my personal possessions already indicated. The bots, Stark Industries, the money; everything else is Peter’s…I just want to add Bucky—Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes—to my will. He gets one of the other houses—Peter can choose which one—and, let’s say…fifty million?”

“Yes, Sir…does this have to do with the two of you sleeping together?” Tony raised an eyebrow. “Is that your business, Fri?”

“Maybe not, but I’m sure the Sergeant would like to know the reason…and if you’re going to pass, I’d like to talk to you as long as possible.” Tony swallowed thickly as tears sprang to his eyes.

“I’m sorry, Sweetheart…if anyone asks why I included him," Tony stopped to think for a moment, "Tell them… he made me feel safe. He was the only person, aside from Peter, to hold me while I cried and not make me feel like a damn fool for it later.”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Friday?”

“Yes, Boss?”

“You know that I love you?”

“I know.”

“Good.”

“I love you too…At least, I believe that I do….If you programmed me correctly.” Tony snorted.

“That’s my sassy girl.”

* * *

The other heroes all arrived at the edge of the perimeter where the public was panicking behind the barricades established several yards away. Nick Fury stepped closer as they approached, scanning the group before he turned to Steve.

“Where’s Stark?”

“Tony’s right back…” The genius was nowhere in sight. “He was just here. Anyone see where he went?” Everyone glanced back, assuming they would see the man. Instead, they saw six young men rushing towards them, panic on their faces.

“What are you doing out here? Did you deactivate the bomb?”

“Not exactly…Iron Man told us to—“

“Iron man?” Fury asked incredulously.

“We have no guarantee of disarming it safely. He wanted us to come out here and tell you to move the barricade another half block. We need a two block radius if the building comes down.”

“How long do we have?”

“Only about nine minutes left. He said he’ll attempt to disarm it at two minutes.” Fury frowned before opening his mouth to begin giving orders, but Maria beat him to it. He glanced at her, nodding approvingly before he turned back to the Avengers.

“You idiots! You’re the bomb squad, aren’t you? How can you leave Tony in there like that?” Peter asked to the surprise of the other Avengers. The technicians were stunned.

“He said we should come out here in case it goes off…since he’s in the suit.” The heroes all exchanged a knowing look with one another and Peter growled as he turned around to dart back to the building. Remembering Tony’s warning to them, the two young men he had threatened caught Peter by either arm.

“Sorry, Sir. Iron Man gave us specific instructions not to let you near the building.” Peter didn’t respond, simply throwing the young men off of him with ease.

“Pe—Spiderman!” Steve called out. “You need to stay here. That’s an order.”

“I’m going rogue.” Thor jumped forward, landing in front of Peter.

“I know how upset you are, but you need to stay here.” Much to the god’s chagrin, the teenager effortlessly picked Thor up and set him back down out of the way before he jogged off once again.

“Spiderman!” Peter turned around to look at Natasha.

“You can’t stop me!”

“I know I can't! But before you go in, remind me of that thing you always say?”

“What thing?”

“Something about ‘great power’?”

“’With great power comes great responsibility.’”

“Ah…that’s right. Do you think what you’re doing is responsible?” The eyes on Peter’s suit narrowed; it would have been funny in any other situation. Peter didn’t move further away, so Natasha stepped closer to him. “Tony gave specific instructions for you to stay out here.”

“You don’t understand! He’s the most selfless person here. He doesn’t want us to get hurt and he’s willing to die alone if he has to…but I refuse to let him die alone. I’ll go with him!” Natasha could hear the emotion in Peter’s voice; she knew he was crying.

“Great responsibility, Peter. Tony is very protective of you, but he also knows your potential.” She leaned closer and lowered her voice. “Those guys back there? Cap, Thor, Hulk…people love and admire them. Criminals fear them, but none of them have the reputation of Iron Man. If the world were to lose him, you can bet that you’d see a big increase in crime. You’re stronger than any of the others, Peter. Tony knows that we’ll need you.”

“No…he can’t be alone…you don’t understand—“

“And what about May?”

“May…” Peter’s bottom lip trembled and more than ever he was grateful for the mask hiding his face. “But Tony…” The teenager turned his communicator back on. “Tony, are you there?” There was a brief pause before Peter heard his mentor’s voice in his ear.

“Yes, Peter.”

“Tony! You need me in there don’t you?”

“I need you to stay out there, Buddy. I want you two blocks out in case I can’t disarm the bomb.”

“If it goes off—”

“You’ll be okay.”

“No…please let me come. I don’t want you to be alone…I-I-“

“Peter, if something happens to me, the others will need you…plus, if I let anything happen to you, May would personally come to Hell and give the devil new ways to torture me. Promise me you’ll stay out there, Bud? Please?”

“…I promise.”

“Thank you. I’m turning my mic off now. Almost time to try to disarm this thing...I love you, Peter.”

“I love you too, Tony.” Peter turned around slowly and Natasha pulled him into her arms. He cried softly against her shoulder as the rest of the Avengers stood in a wall behind Natasha, blocking her and Peter from the crowd’s view.

* * *

 

Tony wiped the tears from his eyes as he cleared his throat.

 _“Four minutes until this thing’s scheduled to blow.”_ The genius once more studied the large bomb, looking for any weak areas; he found none. It was almost too perfect. Tony sat back and rubbed a hand over his face. He closed his eyes for several moments, a thought suddenly occurring to him.

 _“This doesn’t make any sense… if a terrorist group wanted to hurt people, they wouldn’t have called in a bomb threat or left a bomb with such a long_ timer _. Everyone has been evacuated. They might be able to bring down an iconic building, but that’s the extent of the damage they’ll do…there was a reason—they must have had a target. But who? All of the businesses in the building have been cleared out and insurance would cover any damage done…and their so-called army. A lot of manpower, but most of them had weak technique. It’s almost like they were just there to distract us…”_ Tony’s eyes widened slightly and he scooted forward, heart racing as he looked at the bomb. It **_was_** too perfect. Based on the number of pressure sensors on the bomb, it had to have been assembled in the building. There was no way it could have been dropped off. However, judging by the size of the bomb and the picture-perfect presentation of it, no one would have had enough time to assemble a bomb of that magnitude without getting caught. Tony studied the bomb once more, this time looking carefully around the base of the digital clock that had been meticulously taped to the top of the bomb. He noticed the smallest rise in the tape and the man’s eyes widened.

 _“It’s covering a pressure sensor. The timer had to have been placed after the sensors were hooked up…which means…”_ Praying he wasn’t wrong, Tony grabbed the timer and ripped it from the top of the bomb. Beneath the timer was a tangle of loose wires with no sign of a detonator. His brow furrowed in confusion as he stared at the disconnected wires. _“Why? What’s the point of this?”_ Tony continued to look at the inside of the bomb, which was really nothing more than a stack of dynamite, when he noticed a folded up piece of paper beneath the tangle of wires. He stuck his hand in, quickly retrieving it. He hurried to unfold the paper, his breath catching in his throat as he noticed the infamous emblem printed above a short note:

_When you cut off the head of Hydra, two more shall take its place. Thank you for the warm welcome back. It was rather fun, don’t you think?_

* * *

 

“Before we begin, I want to make it clear to you that nobody outside of this room is to know the truth about what happened. We’ve reported to the media that we had reason to believe there was a serious threat but that it turned out to be a big hoax. We’ve refused to comment on the offenders at this time—later we’ll release a statement saying that the offenders are minors and therefore all details of the case are confidential. SHIELD agents will have debriefings later based on their clearance levels… Tony, fill us in.” Fury said solemnly. Tony flipped the note he found onto the table for everyone to see.

“There was no bomb. Just a fancy stack of explosives with all the workings of a classic time bomb—minus the detonator. Hydra’s back and they wanted to make an entrance.”

“Aren’t they a legendary terrorist group? Why wouldn’t they make it a real bomb that could hurt people?” Peter asked softly.

“That’s not Hydra’s M.O. To call in the threat and specifically state they would send out an army if SHIELD tried to disengage the bomb…” Steve sighed and Fury shook his head.

“I walked right into their trap. They specifically wanted the Avengers to know that they’re back in operation.”

“Do you mean to say that everything that happened today was merely for theatrical purposes?” Loki asked. Tony nodded in response. “How terribly amusing.”

“Loki!” Thor hissed as eyebrows shot up around the room.

“I fail to see what’s so amusing about any of this. I also want to know why you’ve violated your agreement and are here right now. Can anyone explain that to me?” Fury asked, annoyance clear in his tone.

“I asked him to come. Could have been an error in judgment on my part, but turned out not to be. Loki could be a helpful ally, especially now that we’re dealing with Hydra.”

“But can he be trusted?”

“I believe I already know too much for that to matter anymore,” Loki smirked and Fury glared at him.

“I want a show of hands as to who would trust Loki with their life.” Fury said, causing Loki’s smug grin to instantly vanish. Peter’s hand shot up just as quickly as Thor’s did. Tony raised his hand leisurely, though without hesitation. However, what surprised Loki the most was when Bruce slowly raised his hand. Fury was silent for a moment before looking at the mischievous god. “Don’t make me regret this.” Loki gave a curt nod.

“So…what do we do?” Peter asked, looking at Tony. Fury answered.

“We wait.”

“Wait?”

“He’s right, Peter.” Steve said. “We don’t know what they’re planning. We don’t know where or when. Until we get a lead, there’s not much we can do.”

“So they just want us to sit and wait nervously?”

“That’s about the size of it.” The room fell silent for only a moment before Tony rolled his chair back from the table and clapped his hands.

“Knowing Hydra, it could be years before we discover their new plan. I don’t know about you all, but if I have to sit around waiting, I would rather be waiting in the tower with some pizza than stuck in this dreary conference room. No offense, Fury.”

“None taken.”

“You’re welcome to join us.” Tony offered, but the director shook his head. “I think I’ll be working late tonight. But before you go, remember. You’re not to talk about Hydra with anyone outside of this room.”

* * *

 

When the heroes returned safely that evening, Bucky felt relief wash over him. Though a bit disappointed that he was unable to learn the details of the mission, Bucky didn’t press the issue. Instead, he sat happily beside Steve, eating some of the pizza that the others had brought back. Tony had immediately suggested a movie, and to Bucky’s surprise, not a single person argued. Though the movie was intriguing, Bucky found himself paying more attention to the others in the room—specifically Tony. Peter was clinging to the man as if his life depended on it. Tony gently rubbed Peter’s back, occasionally glancing down to ensure that the boy seemed happy. The others all seemed to be treating Tony with a sort of reverence, not unlike when he had been hurt on the last mission. Had something happened? Tony seemed fine. Bucky turned his attention back to the movie, certain he was overthinking things.

When the movie ended, Steve chuckled softly and Bucky turned to see Peter still clinging to Tony in his sleep; Tony was also asleep, his head on Loki’s shoulder.

“Anthony, you should go to bed,” Loki said as he gently shook Tony’s arm.

“Hmm? I’m not tired. What time is it?” Tony asked, his eyes still closed.

“It’s nearly nine o’clock.”

“Too early to sleep.” Tony turned slightly, hugging Peter to his chest with one arm as if the boy were a teddy bear, before burying his face in Loki’s chest.

“Yes, you don’t appear to be tired at all. I’ll help you and Peter up to bed if you’d like, but I’m not a pillow, Anthony.”

“I know. My pillows don’t talk this much.” Loki rolled his eyes as the others laughed. Bucky saw it as his opportunity and stood up quickly.

“C’mon. I’m planning on turning in. I’ll take Peter up for ya.” Tony made no acknowledgment of having heard the man, only turning to look up at him with a cranky expression when he no longer felt Peter’s weight against him. “Bedtime.” Tony blinked a few times before realizing that Bucky was the one talking to him.

“Oh…okay.” He pulled himself away from Loki and stifled a yawn as he stood up.

“Why do you listen to him when he tells you to go to bed?” Loki asked indignantly.

“No choice. He’s got Peter. G’night, Everyone.” Tony shuffled away, Bucky following Tony into the elevator as a chorus of “Good Nights” rang out from behind them.

“Everyone’s so loud.” Peter whined softly as the doors shut.

“You’re awake?”

“No, I’m sleep talking.” Tony side-eyed the half-asleep teenager.

“Why didn’t you say anything?”

“I **_was_** asleep. But now Bucky’s carrying me. Loki would’ve definitely carried you if you pretended to be asleep.” Bucky tossed his head back, laughing loudly.

“You might be smarter than Tony.”

“Hey!” Peter and Bucky both laughed as the doors opened. When they stepped out onto the floor, Bucky carried Peter through the living room and down the hallway, walking straight into the boy's room and depositing him onto his bed. The teenager looked up in confusion.

“How’d you know which room was mine?”

“Night, Petey!” Tony called out quickly as he slipped down the hallway to his own room.

“Uh...the door was open. Just assumed Tony didn’t have this many toys in his room.” Peter laughed a little before collapsing against his pillow.

“Oh. Night, Bucky. Thanks for carrying me.”

“No problem, Peter. Sleep well.” Bucky shut off the light and left the room, quietly closing the door behind himself. He waited for a moment for Peter to fall back asleep before tiptoeing softly down the hallway and into Tony’s bedroom. Bucky opened the door just in time to see Tony slip on a clean t-shirt.

“It’s early. You can go watch TV if you’re not tired. I think the kid’s gonna sleep like a rock tonight.”

“I’m fine…I know you can’t tell me details about the mission, but are you all right?”

“Yeah…why?”

“I don’t know…just the way everyone was acting. Especially Peter.” Tony waved the question away.

“Nah, I think he was just tired.” Bucky nodded, still unconvinced as Tony collapsed into the middle of the bed with a soft groan. After kicking off his slippers, Bucky joined Tony on the bed. The larger man lay on his stomach, tossing an arm over Tony who looked down at the arm around his waist.

“Is this your way of getting me off your side of the bed?” Bucky chuckled, turning his head to look at Tony.

“We wake up like this every morning. Why not just start like it too? I like cuddling.” Tony stared at Bucky for a moment before he huffed.

“You know, it’s really annoying how big guys like you, Steve, and Thor can make anything sound manly,” Tony complained as he shifted closer to the super soldier. Bucky chuckled.

“What do you think it’d sound like if you were to say it?”

“I dunno…clingy, I guess.”

“That’s not necessarily a bad thing.”

“Yes, it is. Stop flirting and let me sleep.” Bucky snorted before pinching Tony’s waist.

“Ouch! What the hell?”

“I was showing you how I flirt.”

“How men in the ‘40s didn’t have dozens of sexual harassment suits thrown at them, I’ll never know.” Tony grumbled. Bucky shook his head as he sat back up and Tony opened his eyes, panicked that he had offended the other man with one of his remarks. He watched as Bucky leaned over him to turn on the small light on his nightstand before asking Friday to turn off the lights. When Bucky lay back down a moment later, he snuggled back up to Tony who released a sigh of relief. “Sorry.”

“For what?”

“Sometimes I say stuff when I’m uncomfortable.” Bucky frowned, starting to remove his arm from around Tony.

“Sorry, we don’t have to—“ Tony caught his arm and pulled it back.

“No, I like it. Just…not used to it. Feels like…I don’t know.”

“Like what?” Tony was silent for several moments. He looked down at Bucky’s chest before closing his eyes.

“I didn’t get touched often as a child. If I cried, I didn’t get a hug; I got punished. ‘Stark men are made of iron’. Apparently, that also applied to three-year-old boys. Grew up hiding what I feel. Sometimes if I start to feel too much, I run my mouth and get myself in trouble. I’m not trying to hurt anyone's feelings.” Bucky listened carefully, looking over Tony’s face for a moment before responding.

“Why are you telling me this?” He asked, his tone soft.

“Because I realized today that you’re the only person, aside from Peter, who makes me feel completely safe…and I don’t want to make you hate me by running my mouth.”

“You’ve already proved to me that you’re a good friend. Actions speak louder than words do, Tony. Might not be quite the meanin' of the phrase, but it fits.” Tony remained still for a moment before he moved to press himself into Bucky’s side.

“Good night, Bucky.”

“Night.” Tony fell asleep almost immediately; Bucky lay awake, pondering Tony’s words. Bucky had felt unworthy of Tony’s friendship from the very beginning. He had wondered how on earth someone like Tony could get anything out of a friendship with him.

 _“I don’t deserve his friendship. I’ve known that all along… but maybe I’m not being selfish after all…I think…Tony needs me.”_ The idea that anyone actually needed ** _him_** —the current, extremely flawed version of Bucky Barnes—filled him with a sense of purpose. Bucky closed his eyes as he rested his chin on top of Tony’s head.

_“I won’t let anyone hurt him anymore.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was crazy. I'm sorry for not posting last week. I've never been good with deadlines-they make things I love into things I hate. So from now on, I'm changing things up a bit. I still promise a weekly update (hopefully more than one), but I'm not promising it on Thursdays anymore. It'll just be whenever I finish a chapter and get it up. I'm sorry if the inconsistency will be a bit annoying, but it's going to reduce my stress a lot. ^^;;
> 
> ALSO viviixen made the absolute cutest fanart for chapter 26. I am in love. I don't think I can add a link in the end notes, but you can copy and paste it from below. Look at all the details she included! ♥  
> https://viviixen.tumblr.com/post/183676485321/a-record-player-buckys-eyes-widened-in


	31. Chapter 31

Steve was sitting on a couch in the lounge, concentrating on his latest sketch. He was lost in his work until Bucky—who was reclining across the remainder of the couch while using Steve as his backrest—turned and shoved the man's Starkpad in front of his face.

“Stevie, is this true?” His friend glanced at the screen, grinning as he looked back up at Bucky.

“I thought you were catching up on history.”

“This is history! ‘Singer turned television star Dinah Shore was the only honorary member inducted into the World Golf Hall of Fame in 1994.’”Bucky read off of a web page dedicated to the celebrity. “That was…like…twenty-five years ago…and she became a television star? Gee, she really was perfect, huh?”

“Guess she was,” Steve said, amusement clearly written across his face.

“Think I would’ve ever had a shot with her?”

“Buck, you could have had a shot with any girl you wanted.”

“That’s not true.”

“Oh yeah? Name one girl who wasn’t interested in you.”

“I seem to remember an Agent Carter who never did give me a second look.” Steve’s smile softened and he chuckled as he looked down at the ground.

“You know…I got to say goodbye to her.”

“You saw Peggy?” Bucky asked in surprise. Steve nodded solemnly.

“When I woke up, it felt like no time had passed, but everything was different… I went to find Peggy right away. I had promised her a dance…I wanted to keep my word. I never did get to have that dance with her though.” Bucky leaned his head against Steve’s.

“Thought you said you saw her?”

“I did…but she was too weak.” He paused for several moments. “She had Alzheimer’s. Every time I visited her, she cried—sometimes more than once.”

“I’m sorry, Steve.” The captain managed a smile.

“You know, Peggy had problems remembering things. She also had grey hair and wrinkled skin…but she was just as smart and beautiful as she ever was. I’m lucky that I got to see her again.” The two men were silent for several minutes before Bucky turned back around, his back once again leaning against Steve’s side.

“Do you ever think you’ll fall in love again?”

“I don’t know. Wouldn’t be opposed to it, I suppose…but I can’t ever imagine loving anyone the way I love Peggy.” Steve nudged his friend with his elbow. “But what about you, huh? Turn on a little of that Barnes charm and you could get a girl by tonight.”

“Right. Because every girl wants to be swept off her feet by an ex-assassin with a giant metal arm.” Bucky said with a snort.

“Buck—”

“It’s okay, Steve…really. I’m…I’m safe now. No one’s hurting me or making me hurt others. That’s enough.” Bucky heard Steve take a deep breath and, upon realizing that his friend was about to go off on a tangent about how wonderful he was, he quickly added. “Besides, I found a new purpose.”

“A new purpose? What’s that?” Bucky smiled to himself as he remembered Tony saying that Bucky made him feel safe.

“It’s a secret.”

“A secret purpose?”

“For now at least,” Bucky said with a laugh. Steve smiled as he tilted his head.

“You seem happier these days.”

“Huh…I guess in a way I am.”

“I’m glad, Buck.” The two men fell back into a comfortable silence, Steve drawing as Bucky continued to read on the Starkpad. Both of them were so engrossed in their activities that they didn’t realize Peter had walked straight past them and into the kitchen until the sound of shattering glass made them both jump.

“Shit!”

“Peter?” Bucky asked as he and Steve both dashed to the kitchen.

“I’m okay…that cup, however, is really not.” The teenager said as he pointed to the shards of glass surrounding his feet.

“I’ll go get the broom,” Steve disappeared from the kitchen and Peter started to move, but Bucky held up his hands.

“Stay there ‘til Steve gets back. Don’t want you to step on any glass.” Peter looked at Bucky for a moment before he picked up his foot and stuck it to the wall. Peter proceeded to walk up to the ceiling before smirking down at Bucky.

“Maybe it’ll be safer up here, huh?”

“You’re a little shit,” Bucky said with a smirk.

“Buck!” Peter laughed as Steve walked back into the kitchen with a broom, giving his friend a reproaching look.

“Yeah, language!”

“Knock it off, Peter. I heard you say the same thing when you dropped the glass.” Bucky said as he looked up at the boy. Peter stuck his tongue out and Bucky mimicked the action, causing Steve to chuckle as he shook his head.

“Why don’t you both knock it off and head out into the other room while I get this cleaned up?”

“I can clean it up—I dropped the glass,” Peter said as he walked down from the ceiling.

“I know you **_can_** , but I don’t mind,” Steve began to sweep up the glass, and Peter looked at him in surprise.

“Thanks, Cap.” Bucky watched a smile spread across Steve’s face as he swept up the glass.

“Come on, Peter. Let’s go wait in the living room.”

“Last one to the couch is a rotten egg!” Peter said as he took off running.

“Hey, that’s cheating!” Bucky charged after Peter, but the teenager beat him to the couch, smiling victoriously. “Never lost a race before.”

“There’s a first time for everything, I guess.” Peter shrugged his shoulders as he giggled. Bucky raised an eyebrow before pointing toward the elevator doors at the other end of the floor.

“Let’s see if you can win a fair race. First one to touch the door and then get back to the couch wins.”

“You’re on!” Peter said as he hopped up.

“Hey, Steve! Come here!” The Captain poked his head out of the kitchen.

“What’s up?

“You gotta be our judge.”

“Huh?”

“Bucky and I are racing. We have to touch the elevator door and the first one back to the couch wins.” Peter said as he and Bucky got into a running stance.

 “Count us down, Steve.” Steve stared at the other two for a moment before he chuckled and shrugged his shoulders.

“All right…Three…Two…One… Go!” Peter and Bucky both made a mad dash toward the elevator. Bucky started off with a small lead, but it was only a moment before the two were neck and neck. Suddenly, the doors to the elevator opened, and Tony’s eyes widened as he saw Bucky and Peter barreling toward him.

“TONY’S THE NEW DOOR!” Peter shouted a split second before they reached the elevator. Peter and Bucky arrived at the same time, Peter slapping Tony’s chest as Bucky slapped his shoulder.

“Sorry, Tony!” They shouted in unison as they turned and charged back to the couch.

“Ow! What the hell?” Tony asked as he stepped out of the elevator to see Steve doubled over with laughter. He watched curiously as Peter and Bucky ran back to the couch. They arrived at almost the exact same moment and, after briefly making eye contact, they both turned to their judge.

“Steve! Who touched the couch first?”

“I…sorry…” Steve said through his laughter. “I didn’t see…Tony’s face was priceless.”

“What? You were supposed to be paying attention!”

“Not the first time this handsome mug has caused a distraction,” Tony said with a smirk as he sauntered into the room. “Were you guys racing?”

“Yeah, did you see who won?”

“The kid beat you by a hair,” Tony said with an apologetic shrug.

“YES!” Peter fist-pumped as he jumped into the air. Bucky huffed and Tony pat him on the back.

“Don’t be too hard on yourself. I’d say you did pretty well. Most guys your age are using canes.” Bucky laughed as he rolled his eyes

“I blame this arm and this hair,” He said as he plopped onto the couch. “They slowed me down.”

“Excuses, excuses,” Peter said as he sat down beside Bucky. The man stuck his tongue out at Peter who smiled smugly.

“The arm I get,” Tony said as he moved to sit next to Steve. “But how is your hair slowing you down?”

“Guess I’m not used to it yet.” Peter looked at Bucky in confusion, but Steve and Tony both frowned in understanding.

“Buck, you can cut your hair if you want…” Steve said, but Bucky just shrugged.

“Why don’t you just put it up?” Peter asked, causing Bucky to chuckle sarcastically.

“Yeah, I’d look great with a little red ribbon in my hair.”

“Who said anything about a ribbon?”

“How else would I keep my hair off my face? You better not suggest a snood.” Steve and Tony both laughed and Peter looked at the men as if they all had three heads.

“I have no idea what that is, but why don’t you just use a hair elastic?”

“A what?”

“An elastic. A hair tie?”

“Better yet, a scrunchie,” Tony added. Peter snickered and Bucky eyed them warily. “Actually, Pete, I don’t think those hair elastics were invented back when these two grandpas were young.”

“Hey!” Steve protested and Tony turned to give him a smug smile.

“Wait, you’ve never seen a hair elastic? I don’t have any, but I think they sell them everywhere. Let me go get some and show you. I’m actually pretty good at doing hair.” Peter bragged as he hopped up from the couch. “Aunt May taught me how to braid her hair when I was younger. I can even do a French braid.”

“Please, that’s kid stuff,” Tony said with a wave of his hand and Peter cocked an eyebrow.

“ ** _You_** can do a French braid?”

“I’m a man of many talents.”

“Where did you learn to braid hair?”

“One of my nannies was teaching me before she was canned. It’s too bad my father walked in on her showing me how to braid a doll’s hair. I liked her.” Tony cleared his throat and pointed at Peter. “But it seems like your ego needs to be taken down a peg after your little victory from earlier. You and me. Braid-off.”

“ ** _French_** braid-off.”

“Obviously.” Peter and Tony both turned to look at Bucky. He blinked for a moment until he realized why they were looking at him.

“Oh no. Nuh uh. You’re not braiding my hair.”

“Aw, please, Bucky?” Peter begged.

“Yeah, please, Bucky?” Tony chimed in. Both Peter and Tony looked at the man with puppy dog eyes and pouty lips. Bucky stared at them for a moment before his shoulders slumped in surrender.

“Fine.”

“Yes! Let me go to the store around the corner and get some elastics. You won’t have to wait long; you know, since I’m the fastest.” Peter said pointedly. Bucky chucked a pillow in his direction, but the boy ducked, and it ended up smacking Steve in the face. The three laughed as the Captain slowly pulled it off his face, an eyebrow raised in amusement as he stared at Bucky.

“Sorry, Stevie,” Bucky said as Steve chuckled. Peter giggled as he turned to leave the room, but Tony called him back.

“Underoos!”

“Huh?”

“Come here.” Peter walked over and Tony fished a hundred dollar bill from his pocket. “Get me a latte on the way back, huh?”

“Coffee isn’t that expensive!”

“I don’t have any smaller bills. You can keep the change.”

“Tony, I have the card you gave me. It’s okay.” Tony reached out and stuffed the money into Peter’s pocket before the boy could protest further. “Stop stalling and get going!”

“Stalling?” The boy scoffed. “You wish!” Tony watched as Peter scurried into the elevator. The moment the doors closed behind him, the man jumped up from his seat next to Steve and moved over to sit beside Bucky.

“Hey, get on the floor.”

“Why?”

“I need to practice.”

“Is that why you sent Peter off to get you coffee even though you have some in the kitchen?”

“Come on, last time Pepper let me braid her hair was a few years ago. You don’t want Peter to win twice in one day, do you? He’ll never let us hear the end of it.” Bucky groaned as he slid onto the floor. Tony immediately began to comb his fingers through the man’s tangled hair and, after several moments, Bucky’s head tilted forward as he released a long sigh. Tony stopped what he was doing and leaned to look at Bucky from the side.

“Are you falling asleep?”

“It feels good!” Tony snorted, running his fingers through Bucky’s hair a few more times before he started plaiting it; neither of them realized that Steve had temporarily abandoned his previous drawing in favor of drawing the scene in front of him.

* * *

 

“Tony, I got you a hot latte. I hope that’s okay!” Peter said as he stepped out of the elevator. Tony snapped his head around.

“Oh, hey, Bud. You were fast. Uh, yeah, a hot latte is perfect!” Peter strolled back towards the couches, gasping when he noticed Bucky sitting on the floor with tousled hair.

“You were practicing!”

“We never said that was against the rules.” Peter narrowed his eyes briefly before shrugging.

“It’s fine. I don’t need practice and I can still win.”

“All right, hot-shot. You got the elastics?” Peter pulled a package of brown hair ties out of his pocket.

“Let’s do this.” Bucky stared curiously at the hair ties but said nothing as Peter moved to sit beside Tony.

“I say we split his hair down the middle. Both French braid one side. Cap, you’re the judge.”

“Figured I would be,” Steve said with a chuckle, not looking up from his drawing. Tony parted Bucky’s hair as Peter opened the elastics. The teenager slid one onto his wrist before handing another to Tony.

“All right, let’s go!” Tony declared. He and Peter worked carefully on their French braids. Bucky looked up at Steve, silently watching his friend draw.

“What’s going on here?” Everyone glanced up as Natasha entered the room and Peter stopped his work long enough to answer.

“We’re having a braid-off.”

“I can see that,” Natasha said with a soft laugh before she moved to join Steve on the other couch. Tony finished his braid, securing it with his elastic. He scrutinized it for a moment before smiling and nodding his head.

“I’m done.”

“Just one more second…okay, I’m finished too.”

“Judge?” Steve set down his sketchbook and stood up, moving over to look at the braids on Bucky’s head.

“This is going to be tough. You both did a good job.”

“Cut the pleasantries, Cap. Who did a better job?” Tony and Peter both looked up at Steve in anticipation, and the man stared at the braids for another moment.

“Sorry, Peter. I think Tony wins this one.”

“What?!” Peter protested. Tony laughed victoriously as he nudged Bucky’s shoulder.

“Told you the practice was worth it.” Bucky laughed and Natasha tilted her head as she looked at the men.

“Why exactly were you having a braid-off?”

“Uh…well, we were talking about getting hair elastics for Bucky and…I don’t know. Somehow Tony and I decided to have a competition!”

“Does feel nice having my hair off my face,” Bucky interjected.

“See? And now you don’t have to cut it unless you want to.” As Peter finished saying that, Sam walked into the room, casually sitting down across from the others.

“What’s up?” The man asked as he looked up from his phone. He took one look at Bucky and a twisted grin settled on his lips. “Hey, Dorothy. Where’s Toto?”

“Nope. Changed my mind.” Bucky said as he reached up to pull the braids out, glaring at Sam as the man cackled from across the room. “Thanks anyway, Peter,” Bucky said as he held out the elastics for the teen to take.

“Hand me one of those,” Natasha said as she gave Sam a scolding glance. When she moved closer, Peter held out one of the elastics and she knelt down beside Bucky who looked at her nervously.

“May I?” After a brief hesitation, he nodded in consent and Natasha reached out to run her fingers through his hair, twisting it into a small bun and securing it with the elastic.

“Wow, a man bun looks good on you!” Peter said as he watched Natasha fix Bucky’s hair.

“Man bun?”

“Yeah, just a small bun for a man with long hair,” Peter explained.

“Not the type of bun you remember. Much messier.” Natasha gently explained.

“You look handsome,” Steve said with an encouraging smile. Bucky glanced up at Tony to see if he agreed, and Tony nodded.

“Very Orlando Bloom circa 2006.” Bucky furrowed his brow in confusion.

“Orlando Bloom is a handsome movie star,” Peter explained; Bucky’s features softened into a smile upon understanding the compliment.

“Not bad, not bad,” Sam admitted from across the room before clapping his hands together. “So, what are we ordering for dinner tonight?”

“Isn’t it a little early to be thinking about dinner?” Tony asked with a chuckle.

“It’s six o’clock.”

“It is?” Tony glanced down at his watch and his eyes widened before he glanced up at Peter. “I sent you up here to get sodas for us almost two hours ago…how did we both end up here?” The boy blinked a few times, reaching up to scratch the back of his head.

“I don’t know.” Tony shook his head and chuckled.

“I’ve got more work to do. Fury’s having me work on some new tech…Want to get it done tonight. Have some of whatever you order sent down to me, huh?”

“Me too,” Peter said, but Tony shook his head.

“You’ve helped enough. Relax. It’s your break.”

“I like helping.”

“I know you do. But I’ll need more help soon and you can help me then.”

“You sure?”

“Peter…”

“Okay, okay. I’ll stay up here.”

“Good boy. See you all tomorrow morning.” Tony said as he stood up, rubbing the back of his neck as he shuffled off to do his work.

* * *

 

Peter had brought Tony his favorite Chinese dish when their dinner had been delivered. However, the man had barely managed to eat half of it before completely losing himself in his work, oblivious to the passing of time. When he finally finished his work, Tony smiled in satisfaction and put his hands on his waist as he arched his back.

“What’s the time, Friday?”

“It’s 2:11 AM.”

“Wha--? Are you serious?”

“You know that I am.” Tony shook his head as he stifled a yawn.

“No wonder I’m so tired. I’m going to head up to bed. Shut the lab down, Fri.”

“Yes, Sir.” Tony slowly made his way up to his floor, tiptoeing across the common area and past Peter’s room until he reached his own. He quietly slipped inside, smiling to himself as he saw the dim glow of his nightlight. Assuming Bucky was asleep, he quietly approached the bed, stopping in his tracks when he heard the other man inhale sharply. He took a few steps closer and squinted until he could see Bucky more clearly. The man was lying down, but his body was completely rigid. His eyes were tightly squeezed shut, and Tony tilted his head curiously.

“Bucky?” He heard the man draw in another deep breath and he frowned, gently touching the man’s shoulder. Bucky’s eyes flew open and he looked at Tony before wildly looking around the room.

“Tony? W-what are you doing here?”

“Uh, I’m coming to bed. What do you think I’m doing here?” Tony asked as he tiredly rubbed his eyes.

“Go. Before they hear you.”

“What?”

“Please go…they’ll make me hurt you.”

“What are you talking about?” Bucky’s eyes suddenly shifted toward the door. His eyes grew large and he trembled as he pressed himself against the headboard.

“No…” Tony stopped and stared at Bucky for a moment before leaning closer.

“Are you awake?”

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

“You won’t...” Bucky’s glanced back at the door and tears filled his eyes.

“Go!”

“Hey, calm down…I—“Tony jumped as Bucky shouted something in Russian, watching as the man's hands flew up to cover his ears.

“Run!”

“Bucky! Hey!” Tony snapped his fingers in front of the other man’s face a few times before reaching out to squeeze his arm. “Friday, turn on the lights.” The lights in the room immediately came back on and Tony gently shook Bucky. “C’mon, wake up!” Tears streamed down Bucky’s face, his hands still pressed firmly against his ears for another half minute before the expression on his face gradually morphed into one of confusion. He quickly sat up, looking around the room.

“Tony?”

“You awake now?” Bucky sucked in a sharp breath and he scanned the room again as he grabbed fistfuls of the soft blankets beneath him. He glanced fearfully toward the door before turning back to Tony and nodding slowly.

“I’m sorry… I…I didn’t mean to…to wake you up.”

“Hey, you think I normally go to bed like this?” Tony asked as he gestured to the oil-stained tank top he was wearing. He hoped to get a chuckle from Bucky; the former assassin just shifted uncomfortably as he continued to tug at the comforting warmth of the blankets. Tony noticed that Bucky's breathing was quickly becoming rapid and shallow, and he clicked his tongue softly. “Nope. We’re not going to hyperventilate tonight.” He grabbed a fleece blanket and wrapped it around Bucky’s shoulders before pulling the man in for a hug. “Remember to breathe with me,” Tony said as he took long, deep breaths. It took several minutes, but Bucky finally calmed down. However, Tony did not immediately release him.

“They…they were sayin’ my words…”

“Your words?”

“The ones…that…that make me their puppet.” Tony frowned as he gently rubbed Bucky’s back.

“Didn’t Shuri test those several times?”

“Yeah…”

“Then no one can ever control you with those words again.”

“What if Shuri made a mistake?”

“We’re talking about the same Shuri, right? T’Challa’s sister? The Princess of Wakanda? The young genius smarter than I am? You know she didn’t make a mistake…it was a bad dream.” Bucky was quiet for several moments before he pulled away from Tony and vigorously wiped at his eyes.

“I’m sorry.”

“For what?”

“I shouldn’t have…” His voice trailed off and Tony tilted his head.

“This,” Tony said as he waved his hand over the bed. “We do this for the both of us, don’t we? I…I need you. And sometimes…well, you need me too, right?” Bucky stared at Tony for a moment before slowly nodding.

“But I don’t deserve—“

“Nope. The yes was all I wanted.” Tony said before he crawled over Bucky and slipped under the covers on his side of the bed. “We okay to turn the lights off?”

“Yeah…” The lights automatically faded and Bucky clung onto one of his pillows. Still shaken from his hallucination, Bucky slid deeper beneath the covers, hugging his pillow tightly. A moment later, he felt Tony scoot closer and the man touched his arm.

“Why’re you so far away?” Bucky, who had been waiting for the invitation, immediately twisted around to cling to his friend. Tony wrapped his arms around the larger man before burying his face in Bucky’s hair.

“Tony?”

“Hm?”

“Thank you…”

“Hush. Teddy bears don’t talk.”

“…I’m not a Teddy bear.”

“Fine. Bucky Bears don’t talk either.” The remark was met with a sleepy laugh from Bucky, and Tony smiled to himself as he slowly drifted off to sleep—it felt wonderful to be needed by someone who didn't want Iron Man or Billionaire Tony Stark, but just plain Tony.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was really fun to write. I hope you guys enjoyed it :)


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ahhh, I have been dying to update this. Thank you all for waiting so patiently!

As Bucky slowly began to wake up, he pressed his face closer against Tony’s chest, peeking one eye open when the world suddenly seemed far too bright for his liking. He blinked several times until he realized that the bright light was not the sun, but Tony’s arc reactor. With a cranky grumble, Bucky shifted upward, settling for hiding his face against Tony’s shoulder instead. He inhaled deeply, sighing as the scent of Tony’s cologne mixed with motor oil hit his nose. The combination was unlike anything he had smelled during his time with Hydra and it served as an excellent reminder that he was now far away from them.  

_“Hydra…”_ Bucky shuddered as he recalled the hallucination he had experienced the previous night; he still had a hard time believing it wasn’t real. Reaching forward with a trembling hand, he gripped Tony’s grease-stained tank top, rolling the soft fabric between his fingertips. Bucky swallowed the lump that formed in his throat, finding that—once again—he was feeling too much. He drew in a shaky breath, willing himself to become numb. Laying as still as he could, Bucky tried not to think about anything. Instead, he ended up overthinking everything to the point of tears. Bucky squeezed his eyes shut until he felt himself begin to shut down, a false sense of peace accompanying the apathy that settled over him. He did not move again until Tony woke up twenty minutes later.

“You awake?” The man asked as he reached up to rub his eyes. Bucky nodded in response before realizing that the other man could not see him.

“Yeah.”

“What time is it?” Bucky shifted a bit higher to squint at the clock over Tony’s shoulder.

“Almost nine.”

“Mm. Good.” Tony pulled his hands away from his eyes, running a handing through his hair before he looked down at himself. “Sorry…didn’t mean to fall asleep in these dirty clothes. I hope I didn’t get the blankets all greasy.” Bucky shrugged as he watched Tony examine the bedding.

“Didn’t make no difference to me.” Tony looked back up, somewhat surprised by the statement.

“How are you feeling?”

“Fine.”

“You sure?”

“Yep.” Tony wasn’t convinced but decided not to push the matter. He slowly rolled out of bed with a groan, stretching for a moment before he began to walk away. “Where ya going?”

“To take a shower.” Tony said as he turned back to look at Bucky.

“Oh.”

“Why? You interested in joining me?” Tony teased, a playful smirk on his lips. He expected Bucky to respond with a jocular insult or a pillow tossed at his head—Bucky did neither.

“No thanks. Don’t feel like gettin’ up yet.” Tony raised an eyebrow and tilted his head to the side as he stared at Bucky’s back.

“…All right. Why don’t you sleep a bit longer?” Tony disappeared into the bathroom and Bucky stared blankly out the window, not even bothering to give a response. The man lay motionless, actively trying to avoid thinking about anything in particular. At one point, he attempted to change positions, but his limbs felt so incredibly heavy that he soon decided against it. 

“You still awake?” Tony asked softly as he re-entered the room.

“Yep.”

“You want to come down to breakfast with me?”

“No…I…I think I’ll go to my room…” Bucky slowly sat up, running a hand through his thick hair before securing it with his hair elastic.

“You know that you don’t have to leave, right?”

“…I don’t?”

“No, you don’t.” Bucky considered this for a moment before falling back to the mattress with a thud.

“Maybe I’ll just rest here a while longer then.” Tony gave him a soft smile as he turned to exit the room.

“All right, I’ll see you later.” Bucky watched in silence as Tony left the room before he slowly crawled back beneath the covers to hide from the world.

* * *

 

“I gotta go meet Ned now.”

“Is it twelve already?” Tony asked as he dropped a screwdriver and glanced at his watch.

“Yep! I’ll help you more tomorrow?”

“Looking forward to it. Say ‘hi’ to Ned for me.”

“Okay! I’ll see you tonight.” Peter turned to leave, but stopped in his tracks and slowly turned back to face his mentor. “Tony?”

“Hm?”

“Eat lunch.”

“Pete, I’m in the middle of something,” Tony said with a chuckle, still looking down at his work.

“I know. I just mean soon.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Peter gave Tony a skeptical look.

“Promise you’ll eat or I won’t leave!”

“Oh c’mon, Kid. You’re just being—“

“Okay, I’ll call Ned and tell him that I can’t hang out anymore,” Peter said as he dropped his backpack onto a counter. Tony looked up in surprise.

“All right, **_Dad_**. I promise I’ll eat lunch. Now, will you hurry up and get out of here?”

“Good.” Peter reached out to pat Tony on the head. The man glanced up in irritation to see Peter smirking.

“If you were anyone else, I’d have to make you a new arm to match Bucky’s.”

“I know, but I’m **_not_** anyone else. I’m me, and you like it when I do stuff like that.” Tony feigned a look of annoyance which made Peter snicker. “I’m going to ask Friday if you ate!”

“I will, I will!” Tony laughed and shook his head, intending to spend another ten minutes on his work before breaking for a quick sandwich to appease Peter. However, the next time Tony glanced at the clock, he did a double-take, surprised to see that it was after three o’clock.

_“Better go get that sandwich before it’s dinnertime.”_ Tony thought to himself as he set his work down. He walked over to the elevator and asked Friday to take him to the lounge. As the lift began to move, Tony reached up to rub his sore neck with one hand as he used his other hand to stifle a yawn. When the doors opened onto the lounge, Tony stepped out to see Natasha, Thor, Sam, and Steve sitting on the couches.

“Hard at work?” Natasha asked with a smile as she looked at a disheveled, grease-stained Tony.

“Guess so. Promised the kid I’d eat lunch and the next time I looked at the clock it was after three.” Tony headed past the others as he made his way for the kitchen. “Better grab a sandwich from the fridge before I miss lunch completely.” Steve raised an eyebrow in amusement as he looked at the woman beside him.

“Peter is definitely more powerful than any of us—he has the power to make Tony willingly eat a meal.” Natasha laughed as she nodded in agreement.

“It’s a good thing he’s such a sweet kid; he could do a lot of damage if he wanted to.”

“Peter's a strong boy. He reminds me of myself when I was younger,” Thor interjected.

“Really? I didn’t realize you used to be so annoying.” Sam said with a laugh. Thor raised his eyebrows as he silently smiled at Sam. The man glanced at Steve and Natasha—who were wearing similar expressions of amusement—before he sighed. “Tony’s right behind me, isn’t he?” Sam didn’t even get a response before he felt a slap to the back of his head. “Hey, man! I’m just joking.”

“Joke nicer,” Tony said with a shrug as he plopped down onto the couch beside Sam and unwrapped his sandwich.

“He’s not even here!”

“You know, it’s quite cowardly to pick on a person behind their back,” Thor said and Tony nodded quickly in agreement.

“Thank you, Thor!”

“Okay, fine.” Sam turned to look at Steve, “Where’s Bucky? He’s a fun target.” The Captain shrugged his shoulders, attempting to mask his concern with a worried chuckle.

“I think he’s still in bed. Been trying to get him to come out of his room all day, but he won’t answer.” Tony stopped eating his sandwich mid-bite, glancing down at his watch before he looked back up at Steve.

“You haven’t seen him at all today?”

“Nope…he’s been so happy lately too. I hope he’s all right. Friday won’t let me into his room again.”

_“Good girl.”_ Tony thought to himself, making a mental note to himself to praise her later for having enough foresight to keep Steve out of Bucky’s empty room. He quickly scarfed down the rest of his sandwich before standing up and strolling out of the room. “I’ll be back in a few hours for dinner. Better go get some more work done.” The others nodded as Tony headed into the elevator, none of them paying enough attention to realize that the lift went up toward Tony’s apartment instead of down to his lab.

 

* * *

 

Tony slowly opened the door to his room. Despite his attempt to be quiet, Tony still caught a glimpse of the man’s startled expression before Bucky realized who was opening the door.

“Still in bed?”

“Seems so.”

“You sure you’re okay?”

“Mhm.” Tony moved to sit beside Bucky as he looked down at the other man.

“Steve’s worried about you.”

“Why?”

“Maybe because it’s almost four and you’re still in bed?”

“Is it really that late?” Bucky asked as he rolled over to look at the clock on Tony’s nightstand.

“Have you eaten today?”

“Haven’t been hungry yet.”

“…Does this have to do with last night?” Bucky looked up at Tony before glancing back at the clock.

“Just not hungry…I’ll probably eat dinner.”

“Why don’t you go get something now? Steve’s downstairs.”

“…I’ll see him at dinner.”

“Why are you avoiding him?”

“Do you ever avoid Peter?” Tony looked at Bucky in surprise before slowly nodding his head. “Probably for the same reasons then.” Tony stared in silence for a few moments. It wasn’t as if he the man was Peter; Tony couldn’t force Bucky to do anything. With a sigh of resignation, Tony stood up.

“Suit yourself.” He said as he moved to exit the room.

“Where are you going?”

“To work,” Tony said as he turned back to look at Bucky, who was now sitting up in bed. “Don’t you want to be alone anyway?”

“…I…I mean, yeah. I guess so.”  Tony considered Bucky’s response for a moment before he moved to grab his tablet off the top of his dresser. Though he had planned to go back to his lab, Tony decided that he could work on his designs for a while instead.

“That’s what I thought...but I’ll be in the living room doing some work if you want company—Peter won’t be back until after dinner.” Tony turned around and disappeared from the room. Bucky lay in bed for only a few more moments before he slowly pulled himself out from under the covers and swung his feet to the ground. The man wrapped himself up in the softest blanket on Tony’s bed and then slowly trudged out to the living room.

Tony did not look up from his work as Bucky entered the room. Quietly, Bucky moved to sit on the couch beside Tony. He looked around the living room for a few moments before slowly inching closer and closer until his chin was resting on Tony’s shoulder. Finally, Tony turned to look at him as Bucky glanced down at the Starkpad the other man was using.

“What are you doing?”

“Working on a new design.”

“Is that a watch?” Tony looked back down at the screen in front of him.

“No. It’s a housing unit for Nano-tech.”

“Like that?” Bucky asked as he tapped Tony’s arc reactor. Tony squirmed slightly, still uncomfortable with most others touching it—even if the arc reactor was no longer used to keep him alive.

“Yes.”

“Is it going to be a suit too?”

“Nope. Not enough room.”

“What’s it going to be?” Tony set his Starkpad down and looked up, wondering if Bucky would let him get any work done.

“Mainly a weapon. It will be able to turn into a gauntlet similar to what’s on my suit. The others most likely wouldn't use it often, but if they were to be outnumbered or injured it could come in handy. There’s enough room for a tracking device too. I doubt I can convince the others to wear them on a day-to-day basis because of that, but so long as they wear them on missions, I think that both Fury and I will rest easier.”

“Will I get one too?”

“…It’s not that I don’t trust you, Bucky… but after last night, I’m not so sure that’s a great idea.” The super soldier nodded silently before he tilted his head.

“What about without the weapon?” Tony blinked in surprise.

“…Let me get this straight. You want me to give you a tracking device to wear?”

“Doesn’t sound so bad,” Bucky said with a shrug. Tony disregarded Bucky by giving him a strange look as he returned his focus to the tablet. However, he paused a moment later when it suddenly occurred to him that Bucky probably ** _liked_** the idea of being tracked. It was clear that the man’s hallucination had frightened him—Bucky was probably scared of being taken and used again. Tony opened his mouth to remind Bucky that Hydra had fallen, though he realized that he could no longer in good conscience comfort the man with that thought. If a tracking device made Bucky feel safe, what was the harm?

“I can give you a watch with a tracking device. No need for fancy Nano-tech.”

“Yeah?”

“Mhm.”

“How far away could you see where I am?”

“As long as you don’t blast off into space, Friday could find you.” Tony watched Bucky visibly relax out of the corner of his eye. The man finally quieted down and Tony returned to his work. Bucky was quiet for several minutes before interrupting Tony once again.

“Can I watch TV?”

“Knock yourself out.” The genius responded, not bothering to look up from his tablet. Bucky picked up the remote and hit the power button. The television turned on, but the screen remained black. Bucky frowned as he stared between the screen and the remote. “Peter was playing games yesterday. Switch the input.” Tony said as he added a note to his design. Bucky had no idea what that meant, but he stared down at the remote until he located the input button. He gingerly pressed it, frowning in confusion when the only thing that appeared on the screen read “HDMI 4”.

_“What’s that? Some kind of code?”_

“You want HDMI 2.” Bucky blinked and hit the button again. The screen then read “HDMI 1”. Bucky hit the button once more and the screen lit up, but there were still no programs—just a plethora of pictures and other options. Why was technology so confusing?

“Tony…” The man looked up upon hearing his name, meeting the eye of a bewildered Bucky. He sighed and set down his Starkpad before holding his hand out for the remote. Apparently, he wouldn’t be getting any more work done.

“Give it here.”

“Sorry…”

“It’s all right. I’ve gotten a lot done today anyway. What do you want to watch?”

“You can pick…I don’t really know.”

“Uh, let’s see here. A sitcom would be good. We could always use a laugh, huh?” Tony flipped through several titles, realizing that most modern sitcoms would include a lot of pop culture or historical references that Bucky may not understand. Deciding to play something that would not need much explanation, Tony settled on ‘I Love Lucy’—one of the few classics he didn’t find to be too corny. After Tony started the first episode on the list, he grabbed a corner of Bucky’s blanket and wrapped it around his shoulders before pressing himself into Bucky’s side. The super soldier looked down at Tony before turning his attention back to the television. He loved Steve more than anyone, but sometimes it was nice to spend time with someone who just accepted that he didn’t always feel like smiling.

“Hey, wait...I know her! She was in a bunch of B movies.”

“Lucille Ball. She went on to become one of the most beloved television stars of all time.” Tony explained; he didn’t receive a response. Bucky was already enthralled by the show. The genius grabbed his tablet with every intention of doing more work, though he spent most of the next twenty-five minutes watching the program with Bucky.

Three episodes later, Bucky was sinking back into the couch with his feet resting on the coffee table in front of him. Tony’s head was on his lap, and the genius was holding his tablet over his face as he worked. Both men had lost all track of time until they heard Friday’s voice.

“Boss, Captain Rogers wanted me to inform you that dinner was just delivered. He said that he’ll bring it to your lab if Director Fury has you too busy. He also said he’d bring you your dinner as well, Sergeant Barnes.”

“How sweet.” Tony said as he swung his legs off of the couch, “No, tell him I’ll be there in a few minutes, Fri.”

“Yes, Sir. Sergeant?”

“You know, I’m still not that—“

“He’ll also be there shortly.” Tony interrupted as he sat up.

“Yes, Boss.”

“You need to eat. I don’t want to be kept up all night by your stomach growling.” Tony explained as Bucky scowled in his direction.

“…All right.”

“Go on and head down. I want to put the final measurements on this section while I’m still thinking of it. Won’t take more than five minutes.”

“Okay...” Bucky reluctantly dropped the blanket onto the couch as he stood up. He began to stretch, reaching up to stifle a yawn. “Dunno why I feel so tired…didn’t do anything today.”

“Sometimes nothing can be very exhausting.”

“Guess so. See ya downstairs.” Bucky tucked a loose strand of hair behind his ear before shuffling away. Tony chuckled to himself a moment later when he heard the other man ask “Miss Friday” to take him to the lounge. Turning his attention back to his design, Tony worked quickly to complete the measurements for his new design. True to his word, he was finished within a few minutes. Just as he was about to set aside his tablet, Friday interrupted him once again.

“Boss, I was just—“

“Tell Steve I’m coming down now…he’s so impatient.” Tony said with a chuckle as he shook his head.

“Sir, I just received a message from Karen—Peter’s suit has been compromised.” Tony’s face turned white and he fought to remain calm.

“Is he hurt?”

“Details are unclear…but I believe he is.” Tony blinked back the tears that instantly sprang to his eyes and he tapped his arc reactor, his suit forming around him as he struggled to take his next breath.

“Take me to him.” Tony ran out to the balcony and took off, soaring through the city as fast as his suit would allow.

“Friday…tell Bruce to be ready in Medbay…just in case.”

“Of course, Boss.” Tony swallowed his panic as he looked at the map pinpointing Peter’s location.

_“Hang on, Kid. I’m on my way.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nothing like a nice cliffhanger to start off your weekend, am I right? :) 
> 
> You won't have to wait too long for the next chapter, don't worry!


	33. Chapter 33

“Hey, Buck. How’re you feeling?” Steve asked as he watched his friend step into the lounge.

“Feelin’ okay… what’s for dinner?”

“We ordered Thai tonight. I think you’ll like it.” Steve said as he held up a Styrofoam takeout container. Bucky took it, reluctantly sitting on the empty cushion beside Steve. He frowned as he glanced at the God of Mischief to his left, wishing that the man would move to another couch.

“Were you sleeping all day?” Steve asked softly as he leaned closer to Bucky, “Have you not been sleeping well?”  

“I’m fine. Just have a headache today…You know aspirin won’t do a thing for us anymore. Stop worrying so much.” The Captain relaxed a bit, nodding as he looked down at his food.

“It’s hard not to worry about you.”

“I’m a big boy, Steve,” Bucky said, clearly annoyed.

“I know you are…but you took care of me for so long when we were growing up…and I failed at taking care of you.” Bucky looked up in surprise, his eyes softening as he moved his hand to Steve’s back.

“What happened on that train wasn’t your fault. You know that, right?”

“I knew you were scared to be that close to Zola again…”

“I was a soldier who signed up for a mission. You tried to save me, Steve. Never once have I blamed you for what happened.” The Captain remained silent and Bucky pat his back before moving to open his food. He was just about to take a bite when Friday’s voice interrupted the chatter in the room.

“Dr. Banner, I’m sorry to disturb your dinner, but Boss is requesting you to prepare Med bay immediately.”

“Is Tony hurt?” Bruce asked in alarm. Bucky furrowed his brow in confusion. He had just left Tony five minutes earlier, what could have happened?

“No, Sir. It’s Peter. I received a distress signal from Karen—Peter’s AI. It seems his suit has been compromised. I’m afraid I have no further details at this time. Boss is on his way to Peter now.” The Avengers’ eyes widened in alarm at the thought of their youngest member being in hurt.

“Does Tony need help?” Steve asked.

“Boss did not leave any instructions for anyone aside from Dr. Banner. I will monitor his actions and send you a signal if he requires further assistance.” Bruce dropped his food onto the table as he stood up.

“All right, I’m going to head down to Med bay and prepare for…the worst, I suppose. If one or two of you wouldn’t mind helping me then—“

“I’m coming with you,” Bucky said as both he and Thor jumped up from their seats.

“As will I.”

“Good. The rest of you go find some pillows and things to make Peter more comfortable. Tony and I are still working on a drug strong enough to affect the kid—which means that if he’s in pain right now, he won’t have anything to help it.” The others nodded gravely, abandoning their food to prepare for Peter’s arrival.

* * *

 

_“Where are you, Kid?”_ Tony wondered anxiously as he approached the location indicated by the GPS tracker in Peter’s suit. His eyes scanned the streets below until he spotted Peter fighting several men in an alley below. Tony zoomed down to the ground, effectively taking out one of the men behind Peter with his repulsor. He watched Peter web one man to a wall before turning to shoot a web at another assailant.

_“He seems fine.”_ Tony thought in relief. That is, until he noticed Peter holding his left arm tightly to his chest. He felt his heart sink as he noticed a large, dark stain near Peter’s shoulder and without a second thought, he reached up and aimed his repulsor at the man Peter was attempting to web. When the man flew backward, the teenager whirled around, the eyes on his mask widening in recognition.

“Tony? What are you doing here?”

“Stand down, Kid. There’s two more and I don’t want you taking another hit. What did these assholes do anyway?

“They were trying to kidnap a girl!”

“Where is she?” Tony asked as he aimed his repulsor at one of the criminals pointing a gun in their direction. He growled as his shot narrowly missed the man who darted behind a dumpster.

“I told her to run somewhere safe. They have guns!”

“I see that. Friday’s already called the police. I’ll take care of the last two. Don’t fight.” Peter normally would have complained at the order, but at that moment he obeyed willingly, stepping back out of the way to nurse his bleeding arm. Tony went after the other two men, using his repulsor to slam one of the men into a brick wall. Once the man had been knocked out, Tony turned his attention to the last assailant; a large man wearing a smug smile that Tony was more than willing to wipe off of his face. Well, he was until he heard Peter shout from behind him.

Whirling around, he saw that one of the men had broken free from Peter’s webbing and had grabbed the boy by his wounded arm. The man with the smug smile made a dash for freedom, and Tony growled as he had no choice but to let him go. Tony lunged toward Peter, accidentally knocking several trash cans over in the process. A black cat jumped out at him, and Tony leaped back in surprise as it scurried out of the alley. By this point, his breathing was shallow and his heart was practically beating out of his chest, but Tony didn’t hesitate to shoot his repulsor at the man’s leg, using the opportunity to pull Peter away from his grasp. “Friday, up the energy for me.”

“Yes, Sir,” Tony smirked as he shot the man once again, this time in the shoulder, watching as the criminal flew back into a dumpster, crying out in pain as he clutched at his burned skin. Suddenly, the sound of sirens was audible and mere seconds later, four police cars pulled up to block both entrances to the alley.

“Guess the police have it from here,” Tony said as he picked Peter up and took off into the sky before they could be asked any questions.

* * *

 

 Tony landed on the roof of the compound, his helmet disappearing as he reached up to pull off Peter’s mask.

“How you doing?” Tony asked as he balanced the teen on his hip while stepping into the elevator.

“I’m fine. You can put me down now, Tony. It’s just an arm injury.”

“Nuh uh, you’ve lost a lot of blood.”

“But I’m okay—really!”

“Peter, you were shot.”

“Just once.” Tony reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“You’re going to give me a heart attack, Kid.” Peter frowned as he lay his head on Tony’s shoulder.

“Sorry, you had to come save me…I’m such a lame superhero.”

“That’s the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard…and do you know how much stupid stuff that comes out of the other Avengers’ mouths on a daily basis?” The question made Peter laugh, and Tony held him just a bit closer.

“Can we not tell May? I’ll probably be okay in, like, an hour.”

“Normally I don’t condone keeping secrets from May…but she will actually murder me if she finds out you were shot, so I’m fine with keeping this hush-hush.” Tony said as the doors to the elevator opened. Despite Peter thinking he was fine, Tony rushed into Med bay, the other Avengers all crowding around worriedly. Everyone began to talk at once as Tony set Peter onto an exam table and helped him remove his suit as carefully as possible. Though happy to see all of his heroes worried about him, the volume of everyone’s voices quickly overwhelmed the injured boy’s heightened senses. Bruce glanced at Peter before taking a step back and holding up his hands.

“Everyone, out! There are too many people in here.”

“Bruce…” Tony gave the man a hard stare and the doctor shook his head.

“I didn’t mean you.” Tony nodded as he grabbed Peter’s hand.

“I’m stayin’ too,” Bucky said defiantly. Bruce opened his mouth to protest, but Bucky pointed to his metal arm. “Kid’s got no painkillers, right? I know how strong he is. Peter squeezes Tony’s hand and he’ll break it for sure. Can’t break this hand.” Realizing that Bucky had a point, he quickly agreed.

“Fine, you can stay too. Everyone else, get out!” The others knew better than to rub the doctor the wrong way and they all reluctantly left the room, heading up to wait impatiently in the lounge. Bruce turned to inspect Peter’s upper arm once again, and tears sprang to the boy’s eyes, though he didn’t make a sound.

“How bad does it hurt?” Tony asked. Peter cleared his throat and attempted to steady his voice.

“Bad.”

“I’m afraid it’s about to hurt a whole lot more,” Bruce said somberly as he stepped aside to grab some tools. “You heal far more rapidly than a normal human; the wound has already begun to heal.”

“Isn’t that good?” Bucky asked.

“Not when the bullet is still in his arm. I’m going to have to make an incision to get it out.” Peter sucked in his breath and Tony hopped up onto the exam table, leaning against the wall before gently pulling Peter to lean back against his chest.

“Tony, it hurts… isn’t there anything that will take away the pain?” The tears Peter was trying to hide broke Tony’s heart, and he sighed sadly as he rubbed the boy’s side in an attempt to comfort him. 

“We haven’t been able to find anything strong enough for you, Pete.”

“We can’t leave the bullet in there, can we?”

“You know we can’t.” Peter nodded slowly.

“Okay.” Bruce brought a tray of sterilized tools over to the table as Bucky grabbed a nearby blanket. He covered the trembling boy’s bare chest, keeping the fabric away from the wound before he grabbed Peter’s hand with his metal one.

“Squeeze as hard as you want, Peter. You don’t have to worry about hurting me.” Peter nodded, quickly closing his eyes when he saw Bruce pick up a scalpel.

“I’ll be as quick as I can. I know you’re going to feel everything, but I need you to be really still so I don’t do more damage, okay?” Bruce asked softly.

“Okay,” Peter said as he squeezed his eyes shut. A moment later, Bruce carefully made an incision in the partially healed wound, causing Peter to draw in a sharp breath. The teenager squeezed Bucky’s hand as hard as he could, tears silently streaming down his cheeks. The sight of his kid in so much pain physically hurt Tony, and he held the boy closer as he reached up to brush the tears from Peter’s face.

“You’re doing so good, Buddy. You’re so strong. Just hold still a little bit longer.” Tony whispered into Peter’s hair as he pressed a kiss to the top of the boy’s head. The teenager made no attempt to respond and Tony wasn’t even sure if his words were registering in Peter’s mind. Nevertheless, he continued to whisper soft words of encouragement to Peter as he caressed the boy’s hair.

“All right, Peter. I’m about to take pull it out. Hold real still.” Bruce warned before he used his tools to carefully extract the bullet from the teenager’s arm. Peter did his best to hold as still as he possibly could, though he involuntarily flinched as Bruce began to remove the bullet. Bucky moved closer, using his free hand to keep Peter still while Tony continued whispering softly to the boy. As Bruce pulled the bullet free, Peter whimpered and a tear rolled down Tony’s cheek as he ran his fingers lovingly through Peter’s hair.

“Almost done, right Bruce?” Tony asked, and the doctor nodded.

“I’m going to clean out the wound and then we’ll bandage you up. You heal so quickly that I don’t think you need stitches.”

“That’s good news, huh, Buddy?” Peter nodded quickly as he drew in another sharp breath.

“Hurry, please.”

“You got it.” A few minutes later, Bruce finished cleaning and dressing the wound before taking Peter’s hand from Bucky’s, moving it to press against the bandage.

“It’s already starting to heal, but keep pressure on it a while longer, okay?” Peter opened his eyes, looking up at Bruce before he looked down at his arm.

“Okay…thank you, Dr. Banner.”

“You’re welcome, Peter. You don’t need to stay down here, but you do need to rest for the evening. I’ll check on it in the morning, okay?” Peter nodded before twisting around, burying his face into Tony’s neck. The man looked up at Bruce and Bucky in surprise before he re-adjusted the blanket around Peter and wrapped his arms tightly around the teenager.

“He lost a lot of blood; he would need a transfusion if he weren’t enhanced. Based on what we know of his healing, he should be fully healed by tomorrow—that’s if he rests and gets enough to eat and drink. Why don’t you take him upstairs where it’s quieter? I’ll let the others know he’ll be alright.

“Thanks, Brucie,” Tony said as he began to slide off the table with Peter in his arms. “Come on, Buddy. Let’s go upstairs.” Despite literally clinging to Tony mere seconds earlier, Peter shook his head and pulled away.

“I can walk.” The boy said stubbornly as he hopped off the table. He only managed to take two steps before he started to fall over. Bucky reached out to catch him, immediately picking up the headstrong teenager with ease. Tony shook his head as he watched.

“You really **_are_** going to give me a heart attack one of these days,” Tony said as he slid off the table. Bruce smiled softly as he looked at Peter.

“You’ll be fine, but right now you’re weaker than normal. If you want to recover, you need to rest.” Peter sighed as he attempted to squirm out of Bucky’s grasp.

“Okay, but I can walk to the elevator. I just got up too fast.”

“You are not walking upstairs. End of discussion.” Peter rolled his eyes and Tony raised an eyebrow. “I saw that.” The man said before turning to ask Bruce if there was anything he could do to make Peter more comfortable.

“C’mon, Peter. I’ll take you upstairs.” Bucky said as he walked toward the elevator. Peter was clearly not pleased with being carried, and Bucky looked down at the boy in confusion.

“What’s up with you?”

“Oh not much. Just got shot. What’s up with you?” Bucky laughed and shook his head at the boy’s sarcastic response.

“I mean, why are you so against me carrying you? You tricked me into it last week.”

“That’s different…”

“How so?”

“That was funny… Tony’s gonna be mad enough that the suit got damaged, but me getting shot? He’s gonna treat me like a stupid little kid and try to keep me from going out on patrol, I just know it.” Bucky didn’t have a chance to respond before Tony stepped into the elevator.”

“Hey, you guys trying to leave me here?” Tony teased. Peter’s sullen expression did not change, and Tony frowned as he reached up to touch the boy’s cheek.

“How you feeling?”

“Fine.” Peter lied as he turned in Bucky’s arms, grunting as he felt a wave of pain radiate through his upper arm. “Sorry about the suit…I’ll fix it and—“

“You think I give a damn about the suit?” Peter looked down at the floor and sighed.

“Well, I know you won’t let me go out until my suit is repaired…but I can fix it myself.” Peter insisted.

“You’re not going out in that suit again period.” Tony opened his mouth, clearly not finished speaking, but Peter quickly cut him off.

“What? It was just one bullet! This is so unfair! I’m not a little kid!” Tony gave Peter an unamused look as the door opened onto their floor. He motioned for Bucky to step out first and the man silently obeyed, feeling rather awkward listening to Tony and Peter’s conversation.

“I know you’re not a little kid, Peter. If you had let me finish, you would have known that I don’t want you going out until I finish your new **_bulletproof_** suit.” Peter’s mouth opened in surprise as Bucky set him down on the couch.

“I get a new suit?” An excited grin spread across his lips and Tony rolled his eyes.

“Yes, a new suit. If you think I’m letting you go out again in a suit that’s not bulletproof, you’re crazy. I can't believe I hadn’t replaced it already. I’ve been working on the designs for it, but I got sidetracked and…” Tony’s face fell—if only he had replaced the suit sooner.

“Can I see?” Tony nodded, grabbing his tablet off of the ottoman where he had abandoned it earlier that evening. He sat down beside Peter, smiling as the boy curled into his side. With a few taps on the screen, Tony pulled up the design, and Peter gasped.

“Whoa! It’s so cool!”

“You don’t even know what new features it has.”

“Yeah, but it looks awesome!” Peter’s eyes twinkled with excitement and he whipped around to look for Bucky, wincing in pain as he did so. Tony sighed and wrapped his arm around Peter, gently rubbing the boy’s arm.

“You need to calm down.”

“Bucky! Come see what Tony’s making me!” The man stopped awkwardly backing into the elevator, hesitating before he slowly shuffled up behind the couch, looking over their shoulders to see the design of the new suit.

“Looks pretty neat.” Peter nodded vigorously for a moment before his face paled slightly and he reached up to touch his swimming head.

“Pete, you’re going to make yourself worse if you don’t take it easy,” Tony warned as he ran his fingers through the boy’s hair before looking up at Bucky. “Would you get him a Gatorade?”

“A…a what?”

“I think we have some in the fridge. It’s in a bottle—bright blue with an orange lid. Get him a straw too, huh? They should be in the drawer beside the oven.” Bucky nodded before disappearing into the kitchen, returning a minute later with the requested items. Tony took them, opening the lid to the sports drink and inserting the straw before he held it out for Peter. The boy tried to take it, but Tony would not let him. “I don’t really feel like having a lapful of ice-cold Gatorade. I’ll hold it.” To his surprise, Peter did not put up an argument as he leaned forward to sip from the straw.

“What do you want for dinner?” Tony asked. Once Peter finished drinking, he leaned his cheek on Tony’s shoulder.

“Not really hungry.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.” Peter frowned in thought for a moment.

“Dunno. Soup?”

“Soup can be arranged…” Tony said before he turned to look at Bucky. “Did you get a chance to eat?”

“No…”

“Okay, then. Soup and sandwiches all around.”

* * *

 

Peter stuck to Tony’s side for the remainder of the evening, quite literally clinging to his mentor for comfort. Though Tony normally would have relished Peter being cuddly, he was worrying far too much to enjoy it.

“C’mon, Pete. You’re normally a human garbage disposal. Can’t you take a few more bites?” Tony asked as he looked down at Peter’s half-eaten soup and sandwich.

“I’m too tired to eat more.”

“You want to go to bed?”

“Not sleepy tired. Just tired-tired.”

“Okay, Pete. Five more bites and I’ll stop bothering you.” The teenager made no attempt to continue eating so Tony took the boy’s spoon and held it up to Peter’s lips. “I can make airplane noises if it will help.” Peter scoffed before snatching the spoon away from Tony, grumbling about how annoying the man was as he ate another spoonful of soup. The boy’s action eased some of Tony’s anxiety, ruffling Peter’s hair affectionately as he glanced back up at _Toy Story_ playing on the screen in front of them.

Tony’s gaze shifted to Bucky, and he watched in amusement as the large man stared at the screen in awe, clearly enthralled by the film. So much so that he had eaten even less than Peter had. Tony cleared his throat loudly, smiling quickly as Peter turned to look at him. Thinking that Tony just had something in his throat, Peter returned his attention to the TV, and Tony’s expression immediately hardened into a glare directed at the super soldier. Bucky half-glanced at Tony, doing a double take when he realized that the man was glaring at him. The man took on a look akin to a kicked puppy and Tony softened his features slightly as he pointed to the man’s partially eaten meal. Bucky opened his mouth to protest, but when Tony raised an eyebrow he picked up his sandwich and slowly took a bite. Placated, Tony re-directed his attention to the movie; Bucky made sure to eat every bite of his dinner.

When the movie ended around an hour later, Tony rubbed Peter’s arm.

“All right, Kid. It’s bedtime.”

“But it’s barely ten o’clock! Didn’t you tell me summer was for staying up late and having fun?”

“Peter Benjamin Parker, less than four hours ago you had a bullet pulled out of your arm. You need to rest.” Peter pouted and Tony shook his head. “Put your lip away, it’s not going to work tonight.”

“Well, what if I sleep out here while you and Bucky watch TV?” Tony pointed at Bucky who was wrapped up in a blanket, his eyes only half open.

“Yeah, I don’t think he’s going to make it much longer, and neither will I. You’re going to bed.”

“Tony—“

“I’ll stay with you until you fall asleep.” He said, guessing that Peter didn’t want Tony to leave him based on the way the boy had clung to him for the entire evening. Peter, pleased with the compromise, slowly pulled away from Tony so that he could stand up, but he stumbled forward as he did so. Bucky’s eyes widened when he realized what was happening and he made a grab for Peter, but Tony had already caught the boy. “How are you still so heavy after all the food you didn’t eat?” Tony asked with a slight grunt as he picked the boy up. He didn’t receive a response, and as Tony felt Peter lay his head on his shoulder, he knew that the boy must be exhausted. Tony was halfway down the hall with Peter when the teenager tugged gently on his collar.

“Left my phone in the other room…”

“Bucky! Bring the kid his phone!” Tony called out as he stepped into Peter’s room; he was not about to carry Peter all the way back out there. As he lay Peter on his bed, Bucky shuffled into the room and tossed the phone gently beside Peter.

“Thanks, Bucky… did you like _Toy Story_?” The super soldier nodded as a genuine smile lit up his face.

“It sure was a fun movie. I’d like to see it again sometime.”

“You can, but there’s also two more _Toy Story_ movies…and they are making a fourth one!”

“Really?”

“Yeah! Maybe we can watch the second one soon. We should watch it with Ned!”

“Okay, I’m looking forward to it,” Bucky said as Peter lay back against the pillows Tony had just finished fluffing for him. “Think I’ll go to sleep now. ‘M tired. Feel better, okay, Peter?” The teenager nodded and smiled.

“Night, Bucky. Thanks for holding my hand earlier.” The man smiled as he turned to leave the room, and Tony sat on the bed beside Peter as Bucky quietly shut the door behind himself.

“Tony, I think I’ll be okay tomorrow! Maybe we can…” Peter trailed off, confusion written across his face. Tony opened his mouth to ask what was wrong, but the moment the room was silent he knew exactly why Peter appeared to be puzzled.

_“That idiot better not be going into my room…”_ Tony thought as he listened to Bucky’s footsteps shuffle deeper into the apartment rather than fading away through the living room. A moment later, Tony heard his door slam and he released a deep sigh as he stared despondently at the ceiling, wondering how on earth his oaf of a bedmate had managed to be a ghost for nearly seventy years.

“Uhhh…” Tony turned his attention back to Peter, who was sitting back up with a perplexed expression on his face. “What just happened?”

Despite having done next to nothing for the entire day, Bucky was absolutely exhausted. All he wanted to do was cuddle up in Tony’s big, warm bed and sleep until he could sleep no more. After saying goodnight to Peter, the man absentmindedly headed toward Tony’s room, stifling a yawn on his way. He made it into the bedroom, swinging the door shut behind him before he practically dove into the bed, sighing as he lay back against the pillows. As Bucky reached down to pull the covers up over himself, he froze, his jaw dropping when he realized what he had done. The man held his breath, making no other movements as if that would retroactively cancel out the previous sounds he had made.

_“Peter’s tired…maybe he didn’t hear me. I don’t think I was **that** loud…” _

Bucky winced a moment later as he heard Tony shout at him from Peter’s room.

“ **Barnes, you dumbass! Come here!** ” Bucky ran a hand over his face before getting up and quickly returning to Peter’s room. He opened the door halfway, peeking in with the most angelic smile he could muster.

“You needed something?” He asked right before he ducked to avoid being hit in the face with a pillow that Tony had thrown at him. Bucky picked it up, giving the man an apologetic look as Tony pointed to Peter—who was wearing a suggestive smile and snickering as he looked back and forth between the two men.

“Explain to him that it’s not what he thinks so he’ll wipe that damn look off his face!”

“It’s okay, Tony. You can stop denying it. I fully support this.” Peter said as he used his good arm to pat his mentor’s shoulder.

“Stop that! There’s nothing to support!”

“Sorry…I’m so tired…I-I wasn’t thinking.” Bucky stammered, a bit nervous at the thought of upsetting Tony. “But…Peter won’t tell anyone we’re sleeping together, right, Kid?”

“Un-fucking-believable,” Tony said as Peter gasped, his eyes wide with excitement.

“No, if you want it secret, I can keep it a secret. I won’t tell a single person. Not even Ned; and I tell him **_everything_**!” Bucky smiled in relief as he turned back to Tony.

“See? It’s okay…I’ll be more careful from now on so that—“

“How dense are you? He thinks we’re ** _sleeping_** together.”

“But we are…”

“Sleeping together as in **_sex_** , Bucky. S-E-X.” Bucky’s jaw dropped as he looked at Peter in horror.

“ ** _Why would you assume that?_** ” Both Tony and Peter squinted at the man.

“Why wouldn’t he assume that?”

“Gee, I don’t know. Maybe because we’re both **_men_**.”

“Oh, that doesn’t matter anymore,” Peter said with a flippant wave of his hand.

“…It doesn’t?”

“No, Barnes, it doesn’t.”

“Oh…well, we are definitely ** _only sleeping_** together. As in resting our eyes while we snore. Not…the other thing.”

“Aww…” The teenager said as his face fell in disappointment. Tony side-eyed Peter as he looked back up at the men. “Why are you guys sleeping together then?”

“…You know I have nightmares, Kid…” Tony glanced at Bucky before looking back at Peter. He has them too. We were meeting in the lounge every night when we woke up. Once we were really tired and I guess we fell asleep down there…first night in a while either of us actually slept…uh, so we tried it again and found that we sleep better together. That’s all.”

“…Then that was Bucky I heard screaming last night?”

“You heard that?” Bucky asked, ducking his head in embarrassment.

“Yeah. I thought Tony sounded strange. I was really worried, but Friday said that you were fine and she locked me in my room. I figured you told her to…but I feel so much better now. I knew you must still be having bad dreams, but you never woke me up… I’m glad you’re not alone.” Peter said as he looked at Tony. The man sighed as he reached up to cup Peter’s cheek.

“How is it that I want to kill you one minute and kiss you the next?”

“Because you love me,” Peter said with an impish grin. Tony laughed as he released Peter’s face and stood up.

“Go to bed.”

“Okay.” The boy attempted to stand and Tony raised an eyebrow.

“What are you doing?”

“Gonna have a sleepover with you and Bucky tonight.”

“Uh, no. You’re going to—“Peter pouted and grabbed Tony’s hand as he leaned his head against the man’s side.

“I got shot today. I don’t want to sleep alone.” Tony tried to look unimpressed, but he failed miserably; he was too tired to stand up against the power of Peter’s pout. Tony turned to Bucky.

“You mind?”

“Have a feeling it doesn’t matter even if I did,” Bucky said, laughing softly as he moved toward the bed and grabbed Peter. The teenager laughed as he was picked up and carried from his room, Tony following closely behind as he shook his head. Bucky walked back into Tony’s bedroom and set Peter on the bed before he and Tony got in on either side of the boy. Tony reached out, fussing over Peter for a few moments to make sure that the boy was comfortable before asking Friday to turn off the lights. The room was not even dark for a minute before Peter broke the silence.

“Excuse me, why is no one snuggling with me?” Bucky laughed and Tony rolled on his side as he moved closer to Peter.

“The kid gets cheeky when he’s tired; He forgets that he’s almost seventeen and only remembers how cute he is,” Tony said with a tired giggle as he draped his arm over the boy beside him.

“Hey!” Peter protested. Bucky grinned as he scooted closer to Peter, being careful not to hurt his wounded arm.

“It’s okay, Kid. You only get so long to be cute. Enjoy it while you can.”

“I resent that.” Tony said.

“Yeah, Bucky. Don’t be mean. Tony’s ** _very_** cute, don’t you thin—.” Though the room was too dimly lit for Tony to see Peter’s face, he knew by the impish tone of the boy’s voice exactly how that question was going to end and he quickly cut him off.

“Go to sleep, Peter.” The boy snickered, closing his eyes as he pulled the blankets higher; Tony sighed, though he pulled Peter closer a moment later; and Bucky shifted to remain beside Peter, a contented smile on his lips as he drifted off to sleep. The three slept peacefully throughout the night, and when dawn came early the next morning, Friday took it upon herself to draw the shades; She did not want even the welcoming golden rays of the rising sun to wake Tony, Bucky, and Peter before they had their fill of sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THERE. I ended it on a fluffy note, are you all happy now??? To be honest, I did feel very, very guilty about leaving you on a cliffhanger the last chapter. (I'm not promising it won't happen again though :p )
> 
> That being said, I'm hoping this chapter made up for that. ♥


	34. Chapter 34

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No spoilers, but this is so late because I have been in recovery since seeing Endgame last week.

Peter was the first to awake the next morning. He slowly sat up, using his left hand to stifle a yawn. The teenager blinked and looked down at his arm, rotating his shoulder a few times before jumping up with a grin.

“My arm’s all better! Wow, that was fast!” Peter exclaimed as he stood over the two men sleeping beneath him. With a glance at Tony’s alarm clock, Peter noted that it was nearly ten o’clock; a perfectly acceptable time to wake Tony and Bucky up. “Good morning! Good morning! I’m all healeeeed. I am invincible! Bullets? They don’t stop me!” Peter called out in a sing-song voice as he jumped on the bed. Once his audience was looking up at him with half-opened eyes, Peter did a few flips in the air.

“Tony, make your child be quiet,” Bucky said as he pulled a pillow over his face. Peter dropped back to the mattress, curling up beside Tony as he reached out to poke Bucky’s side.

“Wow, is he this cranky every morning?” Peter asked. Tony responded with a tired laugh as he shifted onto his side to look at the teenager.

“No…he’s normally much worse. I think he’s just pretending to be such a ray of sunshine since you’re here.” Bucky looked annoyed as he peeked out from behind his pillow, and the man’s sour expression caused both Tony and Peter to collapse against one another in a fit of giggles. A few seconds later, Bucky’s scowl melted into a large smile and he pulled the pillow off of his face, dropping it onto Peter's head.

“Ow!” Peter exclaimed as he pulled the pillow away.

“Give me a break,” Bucky said with a laugh. “You completely healed from a gunshot wound overnight and you expect me to believe that a pillow to the face hurt?”

“That’s true! Nothing can hurt me!” Peter said as he jumped back to his feet.

“That’s not true at all! A lot of things can hurt you! You still need to be careful!” Tony protested quickly.

“Aw, I’ll be okay! I’m going to see if Ned wants to go—“

“You’ll see if Ned wants to come over here.”

“Tony, I can go out—“

“No. Rest.”

“Tony—“

 “Peter, you were shot last night. I don’t care how great you feel, I want you to rest today…Besides, you’ll be on your feet a lot tomorrow.”

“I will? How come?” Tony looked up at the teenager for a moment before sighing.

“Well, I wasn’t going to tell you until tonight, but since you’re being so stubborn about not taking it easy…remember that new amusement park you were talking about earlier this summer?”

“The one that opens next week? Of course, I do! I can’t wait to go check it out and—“

“We’re going tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?” Peter blinked in confusion. “Tony, it doesn’t open until next week. How can we go tomorrow?”

“Because your old man pulled a few strings and rented out the entire park so we can enjoy it without long lines and annoying crowds.” Peter gasped and dramatically fell onto his knees.

“Shut up!”

“I will not,” Tony said, a broad smile on his lips as he looked up at the surprised expression on Peter’s face.

“Are we really going? Can I bring Ned?”

“Yes we're really going, and of course you can bring Ned; I was planning on him coming.”

“Dude, this is so awesome! I can’t believe this! You’re the coolest dad ever—Ned is going to die! I can’t believe we get to ride everything before the park even officially opens…” Peter rambled on about how excited he was, though Tony didn’t hear much after being referred to as “the coolest dad ever”. Peter was so excited that Tony was sure the boy had not even realized what he had said. Regardless, it still made Tony feel warm and fuzzy all over.

“I’ve gotta go tell Ned right now!” Peter said as he hopped back to his feet and bounced up and down on the mattress.

“You need to calm down, Mister.”

“I’m too excited! Bucky, you’re coming too, right?” Bucky glanced at Tony.

“Can I?”

“Of course, you can. Everyone in the tower is invited.” Tony unwittingly softened his voice as he answered Bucky, and Peter’s smile of excitement curled into a sly one.

“Well, I’m going to go call Ned. You old men should get some more sleep.” Peter said as he grabbed Bucky’s arm and dropped it over Tony’s waist before picking up the covers and pulling them back up over the two men. Bucky laughed at the boy’s antics, but Tony side-eyed Peter as he immediately recognized the teen’s scheming smirk.

“Go on, you little brat. Get out of here!” Tony said, and Peter snickered as he did a backward flip off the bed before running out of the room.

“You’re so good with him,” Bucky said, not bothering to move his arm. Tony shrugged off the compliment. “…He called you his dad.”

“You heard that too?”

“Yep.”

“I don’t think he even realized he said it.”

“Guess that means he naturally just thinks of you like that, huh?” Tony couldn’t stop the grin that found its way onto his face.

“Maybe…” Bucky closed his eyes and Tony stared at the man for a few moments before breaking the silence that had fallen over the room. “Hey, Bucky?”

“Hm?”

“If you weren’t worried about people misunderstanding our relationship, why were you so determined to keep it a secret?” Bucky slowly opened his eyes, blinking tiredly a few times before he snuggled just a tiny bit closer.

“Steve’s this great big war hero…Apparently, I’m supposed to be one too…but I didn’t die a hero…I was turned into, well, a monster really. Maybe I was brainwashed to do that stuff I did, but I still did it. The way I see it, those dreams  ** _should_** torture me. I don’t really deserve to have you calmin’ me down and makin’ me feel better.” Tony frowned, studying Bucky’s face for a few moments before responding.

“If you think that you don’t deserve it, then why are you here?”

“…I can’t pick and choose when our nightmares come.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Bucky just shrugged, and Tony frowned in thought. “Are you only sleeping here for me?”

“Not sure how much good I do…but you don’t deserve to cry alone.”

“And you do?”

“I deserve a lot worse than that.” Something about the other man’s words rubbed Tony the wrong way, and his lips turned into a tight line. He pondered for a moment before propping himself up on one elbow and looking down at Bucky.

“Can I tell you a story?”

“Uh…okay?” Bucky replied, thoroughly confused.

“You heard of Don Giovanni?”

“The opera?”

“Yeah. Well, once it was being performed at a marionette theater in Prague, and a famous politician went to go see it. Now, the man controlling Don Giovanni’s marionette strongly disagreed with this politician’s viewpoints and he decided he would kill the politician. So, during the scene where Don Giovanni pulls out a pistol to have a duel, the puppeteer swapped out the prop pistol for a real mini handgun. He used it to shoot and kill the politician. When the police came, the puppeteer told them Don Giovanni had killed the man. Who do you think the police arrested?”

“What a dumb question—of course they arrested the man controlling Don Giovanni. You can’t very well blame the murder on a damn…puppet…” Bucky trailed off, his eyes widening as if trying to make sense of his sudden realization. Tony said nothing, letting the man think until Bucky burst into tears a few moments later.

“I can’t believe that it really took you this long to realize that you’re an innocent victim,” Tony said with a soft laugh as he rubbed Bucky’s back.

“I-I didn’t want to hurt any of them.”

“I know you didn’t.”

"I was a puppet..."

"Yes, you were."

"It...would...would be silly to...to blame me?" Bucky asked through his tears, his stuttering revealing how frightened he was of what the answer may be.

"It would be very silly." Bucky swallowed hard and Tony pressed closer, gently guiding the larger man to cry into his shoulder. "See? You don't deserve to cry alone either." Tony closed his eyes, allowing Bucky to cry against his shoulder for several minutes before patting his back gently. “All right, Bucky Bear. You better stop crying or you’ll have Steve worried to death when you show up to breakfast with swollen, red eyes. Go take a shower and I’ll see you downstairs, huh?” Bucky hesitantly pulled away, running the back of his hand over his reddened eyes as he slowly got out of bed.

“Okay…” The man disappeared into the bathroom and Tony stood up, walking over to his closet to find a clean pair of jeans and a black band tee. He was halfway through changing out of his pajamas when the bathroom door opened, and a very naked Bucky walked out.

“Forgot to ask if I can borrow something to wear.”

“GEEZ, Barnes,” Tony said as he caught a glimpse of the unclothed man standing in the doorway to his bathroom. The billionaire turned away as he pinched the bridge of his nose, reminding himself that this was the norm for a WWII soldier and that now was not the time to lecture the sensitive super soldier on modern decency.

“Yeah, help yourself to anything that might fit—just don’t wear anything that’s obviously mine, huh?” Tony said as he quickly zipped up his jeans. Bucky poked his head into Tony’s closet and rummaged around a bit before pulling out a white tee and holding it up.

“Looks way too small…” Tony side-eyed the other man, thinking Bucky was going to make a joke about his size. “It’s perfect. Everyone will think I got it from Steve.” Bucky smirked as Tony snorted in surprise. The super soldier then leaned forward to find the largest pair of sweats that Tony owned before he turned and headed back to the bathroom.

“Thanks!” He called over his shoulder. Tony slipped his shirt over his head, glancing toward Bucky just in time to see him disappear back into the bathroom.

_“Damn. He’s built.”_  Tony thought to himself upon realizing that he had never before seen the man wear less than two layers of clothing.  _“He doesn’t even work out and he’s that beefy? The world really isn’t fair sometimes.”_

* * *

 

“Hey, what’s going on down here?” Tony asked as he stepped into the lounge abuzz with chatter from the other Avengers.

“Tony, the news is talking about the bad guys we fought yesterday!” Peter said as he pointed to the television.

“Yeah, apparently they were part of a sex trafficking ring. Not only did Peter save that girl yesterday, but he has saved dozens more due to these men getting apprehended. It seems they are even testifying against others involved.” Steve explained as he clapped Peter on the shoulder.

“That’s my boy,” Tony said with a proud grin as he stood behind the couch and ruffled Peter’s hair. The teen grinned sheepishly, though he was clearly pleased with himself. The Avengers continued to watch the news story unfold until one man’s picture was shown on the screen, causing Peter to gasp.

“That’s the man who shot me!”

“That’s the asshole who ran out of the alley last night…he was the one who shot you?” Peter nodded quickly, and Tony felt anger flare up inside of him. He clenched both his jaw and fists tightly, imagining several hundred different scenarios in which he could end the man’s life. That is, until the reporter on the news mentioned that the man—who had been the leader of the sex trafficking ring—had been found dead under mysterious circumstances several hours after the arrest of his men.

“That’s odd; I wonder what happened to him.” Natasha wondered aloud. Sam glanced sideways at Tony who pointed knowingly at the man.

“Hey, I didn’t leave Peter’s side all night. Don’t try and blame me for that.” Tony said with a shrug. “Though I can’t say that I’m too broken up about it.” He muttered under his breath. Sam nodded and put his hands up in defeat as Peter frowned.

“Well…at least he can’t hurt anyone again.”

“Men like that are cowards. I think he deserved it.” Thor said seriously. Everyone sat in somber silence until Steve clapped his hands and stood up, trying to boost the mood of the others.

“Come on, let’s go eat that breakfast Wanda and Vision are making. Smells pretty great.” Everyone stood up and slowly began to make their way to the kitchen. All except for Loki, who stayed silently on the couch and sipped his tea as he continued to read the book on his lap. Tony started to follow the others into the kitchen before he stopped in his tracks and glanced back at Loki.

“Tony?”

“Go ahead, Pete. I’ll be right there.” The teenager nodded, and Tony moved to sit beside the prince who gave him a sidelong glance.

“Aren’t you going to eat breakfast, Anthony?”

“Oh, I will… just thought we’d talk for a minute first.”

“Is there anything in particular you had in mind?”

“You know, I just found it a bit strange that I didn’t see you last night.”

“Why is that strange? Were you not with Peter all night?”

“I was…but when I first brought him back…everyone was down in Medbay…Now that I think about it, I don’t recall seeing you there.”

“Whatever are you insinuating? You know very well that I would do anything for that chi—“

“The man who shot Peter escaped from the alley and was later found dead under mysterious circumstances. I might not have thought anything of it, but you were the only one who didn’t seem surprised by the news…and now that I don’t recall seeing you last night…”

“Anthony, perhaps the stress of last night was too much for you, hm?” Loki asked as he reached up to brush his thumb across Tony’s cheek. Tony studied him intently, his mouth falling open in surprise a moment later.

“You were the cat in the alley, weren’t you?”

“A cat?”

“When the man escaped and I went for Peter, a black cat jumped out and ran past me. I didn’t think anything of a cat in an alley…but now that I’m thinking about it…it was the prettiest cat I’ve ever seen. Cats that pretty don’t live in alleyways.” Loki laughed softly.

“I’m flattered that you associate me with beauty, but—“

“It had your eyes. Green and full of mischief. Don’t you dare deny it, Loki.” Tony said, stabbing his finger against Loki’s chest. The god stared at his friend for a moment before chuckling and shaking his head.

“You really are more intelligent than other humans. Aren’t you, Darling?”

“’Mysterious circumstances’?”

“Well, I really don’t think it would be kind to blame me for his death. The man ran for several blocks in this wretched heat. I merely offered him something icy to cool him down. How was I to know that he would freeze to death inside of it?” Loki asked innocently, though a devilish smile threatened to appear on the corner of his lips. Tony—surprised by the confession—stared at Loki, who returned his attention to the pages of his book. The Asgardian had only managed to read a few more sentences before Tony leaned over and kissed his cheek.

“You know you’re my favorite, right?”

“I’m well aware, Anthony,” Loki said, wearing a pleased smile. Tony returned to his feet and once again headed toward the kitchen. Halfway out of the room, he turned back around and tilted his head to the side.

“How did you know where we were?”

“I asked your lovely little AI for your coordinates and she gave them to me—but don’t be too hard on her for giving me your location. She was terribly worried for you and Peter.”

“I’ll forgive her this once,” Tony said, smiling to himself before walking into the kitchen and making a mental note to praise Friday later.

* * *

 

“All right, Boys. I think I’m out for the night.” Tony said as he dropped his game controller onto the coffee table.

“Tired already, Old man?” Peter teased. Tony raised an eyebrow and folded his arms as he pretended to be upset with the teenager.

“Actually, I am. It’s already almost midnight and we’re waking up early tomorrow.”

“Oh my gosh, I totally forgot about the amusement park!”

“Dude, how could you forget that? It’s going to be epic!” Ned said as he waved his controller. “Play for another hour or two?”

“Yeah, let’s—“ Peter interrupted himself, dropping his own controller onto the table. “You know what? I think we should go to my room."

“Huh, why?”

“Oh, no reason in particular,” Peter said, turning to give Tony an exaggerated wink. “Let’s just go watch a movie in my room. We should get tons of rest for tomorrow.”

“Okay,” Ned said with a shrug; he completely missed Tony rolling his eyes back into his head. “Night, Tony.”

“Yeah, sleep good Tony!” Peter said before he and Ned dashed off to his room. Tony shook his head as he headed back toward his own bedroom. Though he normally would have at least feigned annoyance for Peter’s sake, he appreciated the boy’s gesture that evening. Tony was tired and hadn’t seen Bucky all day; it would be nice to talk to his friend for a bit while they got ready for bed. Besides, Tony had finished Bucky's tracking device and was looking forward to seeing the smile he knew it would bring to Bucky's face.

“Fri, tell Bucky to come to bed.”

“It seems Sergeant Barnes fell asleep while waiting for you. Would you like me to wake him?”

“Oh…well, I guess not.” Tony said, his voice filled with disappointment as he pulled off his shirt. “…But wake me if he has one of his hallucinations, okay?”

“Yes, Sir.” Tony finished changing into his pajamas before crawling into bed and asking Friday to dim the lights. He struggled to fall asleep, scared to have a nightmare with no one by his side to wake him. He tossed and turned for nearly an hour until he rolled halfway onto the other side of the bed and buried his face into one Bucky's pillows. It smelled faintly of the man’s cologne, and the scent calmed Tony enough that he eventually fell into a light sleep.

* * *

 

Bucky slowly woke up and grimaced as he rubbed his sore neck. He blinked his dry eyes several times and slowly shifted from the awkward half-sitting position in which he had fallen asleep. He stifled a yawn before he noticed the alarm clock beside his bed read 2:37 AM.

“Miss Friday, Tony’s still up with the boys?”

“No, Sergeant. He went to bed several hours ago. He asked for you, but when I told him that you had fallen asleep, he told me not to wake you.” Bucky frowned as he picked up the blanket he had been using.

“It’s okay to wake me up next time.”

“I will keep that in mind, Sergeant…You must be very tired, but I wonder if you wouldn’t mind going upstairs now?”

“Did he have a bad dream?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Call the elevator, Doll.”

“Thank you, Sergeant,” Friday responded. Bucky gave a tired smile as he wrapped his blanket around his shoulders before shuffling from his room. He headed straight up to Tony’s floor, tiptoeing through the living room and down the hallway to the bedroom. Slowly opening the door, Bucky peeked inside to see the back of Tony’s trembling form.

“Tony?” The man rolled over upon hearing his name, and Bucky immediately noticed the way that the soft glow from Tony's nightlight shone upon the man's tear-stained cheeks.

“Did Friday wake you up?”

“Nope. A sore neck did.” He said as he shut the door and moved to the bed. Tony was fully on Bucky’s side of the bed, but Bucky didn’t care, moving to sit beside Tony as he reached out to brush the hair off his forehead. “What was it about tonight?” Tony closed his eyes, unconsciously pressing closer to Bucky’s thigh as the man pet him.

“…My dad.” Bucky looked down in surprise; Tony normally referred to his father by name. He correctly assumed that Tony would not want to elaborate, so he simply moved his hand from Tony’s head down to nudge his shoulder gently.

“Move over a bit so I can lay down.” Tony complied, and Bucky abandoned his smaller blanket to slip beneath the covers. Tony was laying on his back, so Bucky moved up beside him and lay face down, slinging his arm over Tony’s waist. “We gotta wake up early. Think you can go back to sleep?” Bucky felt Tony turn into him, and the man nodded his head against Bucky’s shoulder. Without saying another word, the two drifted back off to sleep; both sleeping far more peacefully than they had alone. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reality can be whatever I want it to be, and I decided that this fic is my new reality. Next chapter is coming later this week, and I can promise you that you won't want to miss it.


	35. Chapter 35

Bucky yawned as he slowly woke up. His eyes settled on the alarm clock on Tony’s nightstand and he squinted as he tried to read the time. When the blurry numbers went into focus and he realized that it was after six, Bucky quickly sat up as he pried Tony off of him.

Tony whined as the sudden movement roused him from his sleep and he sat up as he glanced at the clock. “Where’re you going? We’re not leaving for an hour and a half.”

“I’m supposed to be on Steve’s floor, remember?”

“Oh…yeah.” Bucky held up a hand as he headed out of the room.

“See ya.” Tony threw a grumpy glare in the direction of the closing door. He pulled the covers back over his head and attempted to fall back asleep; exhausted from his lack of sleep the previous two nights. Fifteen minutes later; however, he ended up kicking off the covers and heading into the bathroom to take a shower, grumbling under his breath about being woken up too early.

* * *

 

“Hey, Buck. Wake up.” Bucky cracked one eye open, blinking in confusion when he saw his best friend instead of Tony.

“Stevie?”

“Good morning,” The Captain said with a chuckle. “Looks like you started to get ready,” Steve noted as he observed his friend dressed in a pair of his blue jeans and a grey tee. Bucky sat up and rubbed his eyes before reaching up to secure his hair into a small bun with the elastic on his wrist.

“Guess I fell back asleep after getting dressed. Is it time to go?”

“We’ve got a few minutes,” Steve said as he sat on the edge of Bucky’s bed and watched his friend get up to find a clean pair of socks. “Bet you’re looking forward to today, huh?”

“You know I’ve always been partial to amusement parks,” Bucky said as an excited smile spread across his face. “I can’t imagine how much better they must be these days…You excited for the roller coasters?”

“I’m thrilled.” The Captain said in a deadpan tone which elicited a smirk from his friend.

“Aw, what’s the matter, Stevie? Is a big, strong man like you scared of a kiddie ride?”

“I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: those things are just giant death traps. Remember that one you forced me to ride in Coney Island? I don’t think I’ve ever been closer to death in my whole life.” Bucky laughed as he plopped back beside Steve and pulled on his socks.

“But you’re still going to ride a few of those deathtraps with us, right?” Steve shook his head, sighing before he looked up at his friend with a half-smile.

“You know I will.”

“Will you also be screaming like a little girl while you’re on the rides with us?” Bucky asked, grinning broadly as he slipped on his sneakers. Steve simply glared in response as his friend chortled. “I think Peter would really enjoy seeing that.”

“That’s enough out of you!” Steve said, though he chuckled softly—he enjoyed seeing his friend so relaxed.

“All right, all right. You ready?”

“As ready as I’ll ever be.”

“You’ll be fine…as long as you don’t throw up on me.” Steve managed to land a punch on Bucky’s arm before the man stood up and excitedly ran ahead of him toward the elevator.

* * *

 

“Whoa…” Peter and Ned said in unison as they stepped into the new amusement park and looked around in awe.

“It’s been a while since I’ve been to a place like this. Looks like amusement parks have really taken it up a notch, huh?” Tony said as he took a quick glance around before watching the two teenagers with a huge smile plastered onto his face.

“I’m so excited to experience one of these amusement parks you humans seem to enjoy so much,” Thor said as he stepped up behind Tony.

“I can fly around up in the air anytime I want,” Sam said with a shrug. “I’m mainly here for the corn dogs.”

“I hear that,” Rhodey said in agreement. Tony laughed as he glanced back at his friends, his gaze instantly settling on Bucky who was staring in awe at the scene before him.

“Don’t get too excited, Alice. It’s not exactly Wonderland.” Tony said, and Bucky hardly looked at him as he pushed forward, his eyes lit up with excitement.

“Ain’t it though? …C’mon, boys. Let’s ride the biggest one first!” Bucky said as he moved up beside Peter and Ned. The three looked at one another before breaking out in a run toward the tallest roller coaster.

“We literally have this place to ourselves for over twelve hours—I’m not running!” Tony shouted. The three immediately slowed to a jog, and Bucky turned around with a teasing grin on his face.

“Aren’t you excited, Stevie?” He called out. The man simply groaned in response and Sam raised an eyebrow as he looked at the man beside him.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up. Is ** _the_** Captain America scared of roller coasters?”

“I’m not **_scared_** of them, it’s just—“

“Oh my god. You are scared of roller coasters!” Sam exclaimed.

“Wait, you are?” Peter asked as the gap between the two groups closed. Bucky simply grinned at Steve.

“I have never ridden one, but what could possibly be so frightening about them?” Loki asked as he stared up at the large structure looming overhead. “It looks as if it were designed for a child’s enjoyment.”

“Why do you think it’s called an amusement park?” Rhodey asked; Loki considered this before nodding.

“Do you know how many accidents happen on these things?” Steve asked seriously. “First of all, it makes you really dizzy and nauseous. Second, they just aren’t that safe. People get their scalps ripped off and body parts cut off. If the ride malfunctions, they might be launched out of their seat—“

“This is more exciting than I thought it would be!” Thor interrupted, his eyes twinkling with amusement. “You say humans pay to come here and take their chances riding these dangerous machines? I may have underestimated the bravery of those here on Earth. This sounds like great fun!”

“What? Thor, no—“ A flustered Steve protested, but Bruce stepped forward and interrupted him.

“I can’t say that I’m particularly fond of roller coasters myself, but these are very different from the ones you rode back in the ‘40s. Of course, there is always a small chance of something happening, but it’s far less likely. Not only are the designs improved, but there are regulations and inspectors that regularly check the rides to ensure they are working properly.”

“Aw, c’mon, Bruce. You totally ruined the fun by telling him that.” Tony said as he grinned smugly at Steve.

“Tony, be nice,” Natasha said, though she also shared Tony’s expression of mirth.

“Fine, haha. Laugh all you want, but if one of you leaves the park with a missing limb, I don’t want to hear about it.”

“Am I included in that?” Bucky asked as he glanced down at his Vibranium arm. Steve’s jaw fell open, and Bucky bit back a grin as the others around him burst into laughter.

* * *

 

“Let’s do one more ride before we eat lunch!” Peter insisted as they exited a small roller coaster.

“How can you think of eating?” Steve asked as he put his hand onto his stomach.

“Captain Rogers, are you okay?” Ned asked. Peter turned to look at the man and frowned.

“You look kinda green.”

“Why don’t you sit the next one out, Stevie?” Bucky suggested as he came up behind his friend and clapped him on the back. “We’ve lost half our group to the refreshment area a while ago anyway. Just go join them while we do the next ride.”

“You don’t mind?”

“You’ll be doing us a favor, Cap,” Tony said as he slung one arm around Peter and the other around Ned. “Trust me when I say that there’s no bigger appetite killer than being covered in someone else’s vomit.” Steve chuckled softly and nodded, needing no further encouragement. The Captain headed off to find the others, leaving Bucky and the boys with Tony, Natasha, and Thor.

“Should we do the drop tower next?” Bucky asked, excited to try the ride ever since Peter and Ned had explained to him what it was.

“Yeah, let’s do that one before we eat!” Ned agreed. Thor snuck up behind Tony, grabbing Peter with one arm before he reached over to grab Ned with the other. The god broke out into a sprint toward the drop tower as he and the teenagers he was carrying screamed in excitement; Tony, Bucky, and Natasha followed at a normal pace.

“Huh…maybe giving them access to unlimited cotton candy was a bad idea.” Tony mused as he glanced at Natasha.

“You think?”

“They haven’t even hit the ice cream or churro stands yet…hopefully, they’ll expend enough energy with all that screaming to cancel out the inevitable sugar high.” Just as Tony said this, a dark cloud formed in the otherwise sunny sky, and small bolts of lightning surged around it. Thor said something that caused the teenagers to howl with laughter as lightning streaked across the quickly darkening sky. Suddenly, Peter—who had apparently deemed it necessary to bring his web shooters to the amusement park—shot a web and swung out of Thor’s grasp, landing on the side of the drop tower. The teenager began to run up the tall metal structure as Thor and Ned cheered him on encouragingly. Bucky’s eyes widened and Natasha raised an eyebrow as she turned to look at Tony, who was staring at the scene in disbelief.

“Peter Benjamin Parker, get off that tower! You’re supposed to ride inside of it, not scale it!” Tony shouted as he jogged ahead of Bucky and Natasha toward the ride.

“Uh oh, I think Peter’s in trouble,” Thor said to Ned. Tony gave the god a sidelong glance as Peter began to descend from the tower.

“He’s not the only one, Thor…” Upon realizing that he was unsure if Thor even had a middle name, Tony just filled in the gap with the first name that came to mind, “…Marie Odinson. You better roll that storm cloud back where it came from. We still have the rest of the day out here, and I’d rather not be caught in a storm.” Ned and Peter burst into laughter at the middle name Tony chose, and the Asgardian squinted his eyes in Tony’s direction, though the sky quickly cleared up.

“Come on, let’s hurry up. I’m starving!” Ned said as Peter hopped back onto the ground.

“Me too! C’mon, Guys!” Peter said as he, Ned, and Thor ran into the empty queue. Natasha, Tony, and Bucky followed behind the more energetic half of the group, and soon the ride operator had all six of them strapped into their seats.

“Ready, Bucky?” Peter called over Tony, who was sitting between them.

“I was born ready!” The ride suddenly lifted off the ground and Bucky kicked his feet, a giddy laugh escaping his lips. The lights of the ride dimmed before shutting off completely as the riders finished their ascent to the top of the tower. All at once, the seats plummeted back toward the ground and Bucky laughed in surprise when he heard the screams of the others. As the chairs began their ascent back to the top of the tower—this time at a much higher speed—Bucky felt a sharp pain in his thigh. He gasped in surprise and looked down to find Tony’s nails digging into his thigh as if the man’s life depended on it. Turning his head to the side, Bucky squinted through the darkness at the man in the chair beside him. The rapid movement of the ride combined with the screams of the others made it hard for him to see Tony, but Bucky was almost positive that the man was having a panic attack. He moved his hand down and placed it over Tony’s, unsure of what else he could do to help calm his friend.

The remainder of the ride lasted for only two minutes; though it seemed far longer to Tony. When the ride finally returned to the ground, the genius pulled his hand off of Bucky’s thigh and quickly pushed himself out from under the safety bar. He stumbled as he quickly moved past the others, and Natasha reached out to catch him.

“Hey, are you okay?” She asked worriedly.

“I hope so,” Tony said with a nervous laugh as he put his hand on his stomach, playing his panic attack off as nausea. Natasha helped him straighten up, and Tony pulled away as he made a beeline for the ride’s exit. When he stepped outside, he took a deep breath in an attempt to calm himself. Upon spotting a nearby restroom, he broke out into a sprint for it. Tony swung the door open and quickly walked inside before he proceeded to lock himself in the handicapped stall. He slid to the ground and buried his face in his hands, tears beginning to flow freely down his cheeks once he was sure no one would see him. Tony sucked in a sharp breath, his body shuddering as he choked back a sob.

“Tony, are you in here?” The genius clapped a hand over his mouth, his eyes growing wide as he heard Peter’s voice. He took a deep breath and cleared his throat before answering.

“Yeah, Bud. You all go to lunch. I’ll join you soon.”

“Are you okay? We can wait for you.” Tony heard Peter step into the bathroom and he forced a shaky laugh.

“I’m nauseous, not dying. It’ll pass soon enough. Go eat!”

“Well…okay…but if you feel worse, will you promise to call me?”

“Okay…promise.”

“We can go home if it’s real bad.”

“Peter, go. I’ll see you soon.”

“Okay…” Tony heard Peter drag his feet out of the bathroom and he wiped his teary eyes. Peter was ready to leave his VIP day at an amusement park because he thought Tony had an upset stomach? The realization caused Tony to cry harder, and the man hugged his knees to his chest, as he tried to forget the flashbacks that had seemed far too real only moments before.

* * *

 

“Tony said we should go join the others... I think that ride was too much for him.” Peter said as he walked out of the bathroom and joined the others nearby. “You guys can go ahead…I think I’ll just wait out here for him.” Peter said as he sat down.

“I’m sure he’ll be fine,” Bucky said with a shrug of his shoulders. “You haven’t eaten all day. If you’re so worried about him, I’ll wait out here. Go get some food.” Peter opened his mouth to protest before quickly clamping it shut. Normally, he would never leave Tony when he felt the man was in distress, but Peter had seen firsthand how gentle Bucky was with Tony. Plus, if Tony ** _did_** happen to need help, it would probably only bring the two men closer together.

“Well…okay. We’ll order for you too then! What do you want?”

“You guys surprise me. I’m sure anything they have here will be delicious.” The others nodded and headed off to get lunch. Bucky sat down on a bench until the four disappeared around a corner. Once they were out of sight, he stood up and headed for the bathroom, quietly swinging the door open before poking his head inside.

“Tony?” As Bucky stepped into the bathroom, he could clearly see that Tony was sitting on the floor of the handicapped stall, but the man made no acknowledgment of having heard him. “Tony, it’s just me. The others went to lunch.” Bucky said as he walked up to the stall and gently rapped on the door with the back of his hand. “Can I come in?” Once again, Bucky was greeted by silence. Tony seemed to be making no attempt to unlock the door, and Bucky was considering giving up and going back outside when he heard the door click and it slowly swung halfway open.

Bucky nudged the door open further and stepped into the stall, looking down at Tony as he closed the door behind himself. Tony’s knees were tucked up against his chest and his head was down to keep his face hidden. Stepping over him, Bucky moved further into the stall and leaned his back against the wall before slowly sliding down to sit beside the man.

“What happened?”

“…Flashback.” Tony finally answered several moments later. “Remember when I told you about the wormhole?”

“Yeah.”

“That ride…it was so dark…and then going straight up and then falling straight down...” Bucky put his arm around Tony and squeezed his shoulders. The men sat in silence for a few minutes, yet Tony still had not stopped trembling. Slowly, Bucky pulled away and rubbed his hand over Tony’s back as he spread his legs apart.

“C’mere.” Bucky said as he reached out and pulled Tony into his arms. “I know I normally hold you lying down, but I’m not laying on a bathroom floor—I don’t care if it is new.” A half smile was on Bucky’s lips as Tony looked up at him in surprise. “You need to calm down. We’ve got to go back to the others soon before they come lookin’ for us.”

“Oh…right. I’ll be fine. I just—“Tony attempted to stand up, but Bucky pulled Tony back down between his legs.

“You’ll just sit here until you calm down.” Bucky studied Tony for a moment, frowning as he reached out to rub his friend’s back. “You’re breathing too fast.”

“When did you get so good at recognizing my panic attacks?”

“Since you started teaching me how to recognize my own.” Tony just stared at the man for a moment before pressing closer and laying his forehead on Bucky’s shoulder.

“Give me two minutes, okay?” Bucky nodded silently in response as he continued to rub Tony’s back. After two minutes had passed, Tony’s had stopped trembling and started to breathe more slowly. Another two minutes, and he was asleep. Bucky leaned his head against the wall as he looked up at the ceiling before glancing back down at the man in his arms.

_“He hasn’t slept well lately. I think five more minutes would be fine.”_

* * *

 

 After allowing Tony to sleep for nearly ten minutes, Bucky gently woke his friend. Tony was clearly still tired and upset, but he stood up and headed out of the bathroom without a word of complaint. What truly surprised Bucky was the convincing mask that Tony put on the moment they had approached the rest of their group. Bucky observed Tony carefully throughout the remainder of the day, watching for any sign of anxiety or exhaustion, but he saw none; Tony smiled as he went on every ride, ate every snack Peter and Ned offered him, and willingly posed for every ridiculous picture that the boys requested. The Avengers stayed in the park until well after sunset, and by the time they finally ended up leaving the park, it was nearly ten o’clock.

“You guys might want to squeeze into the other two cars,” Tony said as he pulled out his clicker to unlock his car. “I’m taking Ned home before heading back to the tower.” The tired adults all nodded as they piled into the remaining two cars while Ned and Peter, who still had a surprising amount of energy, hopped into Tony’s Audi. As the man slid into the driver’s seat, Peter turned on the radio to Tony’s favorite classic rock station. Tony grinned as he started the engine and sped away while he and the boys belted out the lyrics at the top of their lungs.

* * *

 

It was close to eleven by the time Tony and Peter returned to the tower. Exhaustion had hit Peter hard on the drive home from Ned’s house, and he groaned when Tony turned off the engine.

“I think I’ll just sleep here tonight.”

“Kid, get up,” Tony said with a tired chuckle.

“This car is pretty comfortable,” Peter said as he reclined the seat. Tony laughed at the boy’s antics and shook his head.

“Your bed is more comfortable. Come on, I thought we were going to make pancakes tomorrow morning?”

“I can come upstairs when I wake up.”

“Peter.” The teenager looked at Tony for a moment before returning the seat to its upright position with a dramatic sigh.

“Okay, okay. I’m coming.”

“Good boy.”

The two got out of the car and headed to the elevator. They stepped inside and both leaned back against the wall, riding up in silence. Shortly before they reached their floor, Peter turned and looked up at Tony before moving closer and wrapping his arms around the man’s waist. Tony looked down at him with a smiled as he returned the hug.

“Today really wore you out, huh, Bud?” Tony asked in amusement.

“It was the best day ever. Thank you for taking us.”

“I had fun too…you better send me those pictures from earlier.”

“Only if you send me the ones you took. I especially want that one of Captain Rogers clinging to Thor after he got off that really big roller coaster.” Tony chuckled as he pushed the curls off Peter’s forehead.

“I really did capture a great moment, didn’t I? I think I’ll have it framed.” Peter laughed as the elevator doors opened before reluctantly releasing Tony and stepping out onto their floor. As they walked through the apartment, Peter frowned and turned back to Tony.

“Will Bucky come up? I can sleep with you if you want.”

“Don’t worry about me, Kid. He’s probably already in bed anyway.” Tony said as he gestured toward his bedroom. Peter’s eyebrows knit together in thought.

“How did he get up here?”

“Huh?”

“Besides us, there’s like three people that can get up here without…permission.” A grin spread across Peter’s face and he tilted his head to the side. “You gave him unlimited access to our floor?” Tony narrowed his eyes, knowing full well what the boy was insinuating.

“Peter…”

“It’s just that not even any of the Avengers are allowed to come up to our floor without permission, so—“

“It’s more convenient, Peter.”

“Uh huh, sure it is.” Tony raised an eyebrow and Peter just grinned. “Teasing you is fun.”

 “Oh, is it now?”

“Yep!” Peter said with an impish giggle before he leaned forward and dropped his voice to a whisper. “But also, I still approve if you and Bucky ever…you know...get together.” Tony slapped the back of the boy’s head and Peter snickered.

“Go to bed. You turn into a demon when you’re tired and lacking sensible thoughts.”

“Not until I get a hug to make up for that slap to the back of my head!” Tony laughed softly as he pulled Peter close and hugged him tightly. The boy returned the embrace, and the two stood silently for a moment before Peter tilted his face up to kiss Tony’s cheek. “Thanks again for today.”

“You’re welcome,” Tony said as he released the teenager. “Now go to bed!”

“Yes, Sir!” Peter saluted Tony before turning and heading into his room. Once Peter was in his room, Tony’s smile slowly faded and he walked down the hallway and into his own room. He frowned upon opening the door and seeing an empty bed, though he sighed in relief a moment later as he heard the shower running in the bathroom. The exhausted man stripped down to his boxers before finding a clean tee and slipping it over his head. He dragged himself back across the room and collapsed onto the bed; Tony was fast asleep before Bucky even finished his shower.

* * *

 

Bucky awoke with a start as Tony thrashed around beside him. Without any hesitation, he reached out to shake his friend awake.

“Hey, wake up. Tony? C’mon, wake up.” Tony’s eyes finally flew open and he gasped, quickly pulling away. Bucky frowned, reaching out more cautiously to touch Tony’s arm. “I-I’m not going to hurt you.”

 As Tony fully awoke and his vision became slightly clearer, he realized where he was and immediately launched himself into Bucky’s arms, clinging to the other man as if his life depended on it. Bucky froze in surprise, the thought of sleep pushed to the back of his mind as he slowly moved to wrap his arms around Tony. “What’s wrong, Doll?” Tony did not respond, and Bucky attempted to pull away to get a better look at his friend’s face; however, Tony would not let him move. “Tony?”

“…Huh?”

“What’s wrong?” Bucky asked again, his husky voice barely above a whisper.

“Nothing.”

“Liar.” Tony made no attempt to speak for several moments. His breathing was fast and shallow and Bucky reached up to thread his fingers through Tony’s hair, silently petting Tony until he heard the man’s breathing begin to even out.

“I’m sorry about Siberia,” Tony said suddenly. Bucky stopped running his fingers through the man’s hair, surprised by the unexpected apology.

“Why are you sorry?”

“I attacked you. I said terrible things. For what it’s worth, I never planned to kill you. I was just angry. I wanted to fight you.”

“It’s-it’s fine. I deserved it.”

“No, you didn’t. Remember? You were the puppet. I knew that…and I saw the tears in your eyes after you were forced to watch the video next to me…I was so angry…and then Steve…well… I just didn’t think about how much you were hurting too.”

“Did you dream about Siberia?” Tony fell silent again. Bucky sighed softly, but did not press the man for an answer. Tony shifted as if he were trying to press closer to the super soldier—which Bucky was pretty sure was not possible—and judging by the slight tug he felt on his shirt, he could tell that Tony had grabbed onto his Vibranium arm. He found it odd that Tony was clinging to him so tightly despite having a nightmare about their battle, and he squeezed Tony’s arm gently as he looked down at him. “Tell me why you’re so upset.”

“…I’m scared to be alone again.” Tony finally said, his voice barely audible.

“C’mon, you know that’s silly. You have all of us, and—“

“And I lost everyone once before.”

“Well…you didn’t have me before,” Tony said nothing, but Bucky felt him try to press closer once again. The large man ended up swinging his leg out over Tony’s, pressing his heel behind the man’s legs so that Tony was completely enveloped in his embrace. “I’ll tell ya the same thing I told Steve seventy years ago—I’m with you ‘til the end of the line. I owe you everything—but even if I didn’t owe you a damn thing—I’d still say it. You’re a good man, and I’m lucky to have you as a friend. I trust you, Tony. Trust me too.”

“…I do trust you.”

“Well, good. Then go back to sleep.” Bucky knew that would be easier said than done—he was not sure that he had ever seen Tony quite so shaken—but he kept Tony close as he returned his hand to the man’s hair, hoping that he could help Tony fall asleep quickly. It was nearly an hour before Bucky realized that the man had finally drifted back off, and only then did he allow himself to close his eyes and go back to sleep.

* * *

 

The next morning, Tony awoke to the sound of rain gently falling against the window. He sighed contentedly as he pressed closer to the warmth beside him.

“G’morning.” Tony opened his eyes to see Bucky sitting up next to him. The super soldier rubbed his face before covering a yawn with the back of his hand.

“Morning.”

“How do you feel?”

_“Can I say ‘embarrassed?’ I used to be able to hold it together so much better; no matter how tired or anxious I was.”_ Tony thought to himself before his eyes fell back to Bucky’s leg. “Fine, I guess.” He finally said when he realized that he had not given a response.

“Good.” Tony closed his eyes and snuggled further beneath the covers which caused Bucky to chuckle. “Going back to sleep?”

“No…but it’s nice on rainy days to just…listen and be comfortable.”

“That’s a good point.” After a brief moment of silence, Tony suddenly opened his eyes, propping himself up on his elbow as he leaned over Bucky to grab a watch off of the nightstand.

“I forgot. This is for you. It has that tracker you wanted.” Bucky took the watch, a smile lighting up his face.

“Really? So…you can see me anywhere with this, right?”

“Sure can.” Tony lay back down as he watched his friend fasten the watch around his wrist.

“Gee, thanks, Tony. It’s a real nice lookin’ watch too.” The genius smiled as he watched Bucky admire the timepiece on his wrist.

“Looks good on you.” Bucky grinned down at Tony, looking at the watch for another moment before he ran his fingers through his long hair in an attempt to detangle it.

“What’re you gonna do today?”

“Pete and I are making pancakes for breakfast. You’re welcome to join us.” Tony said as he reached out to pick a piece of lint off of Bucky’s pajama pants.

“Sounds great. I haven’t had pancakes in…so long.” Bucky proceeded to chatter excitedly about the variety of breakfast foods he loved, and Tony lay beside him, listening attentively as he watched the man run his fingers through his hair. When Bucky began to twist his hair back into a small, messy bun, Tony’s mind drifted. He sighed softly as his eyes wandered over Bucky’s sharp jawline before they ended up on the man’s large bicep. When Bucky finished securing his hair with an elastic and his arm dropped back to his side, Tony’s eyes were back on Bucky’s face, admiring the way his big blue eyes twinkled as he spoke. Tony smiled as he lay there—that is, until he realized that he had not heard a single word Bucky said because he had been too busy admiring how absolutely gorgeous the man was.

_“No. No. Peter’s teasing got in your head, that’s all.”_ He waved the thought away, but as Bucky laughed softly at something he said, Tony’s heart skipped a beat and his eyes widened. _“No. No no no no no.  Anthony Edward Stark, stop these crazy thoughts. He’s your friend. **Just** your friend. You have a lot of handsome friends. Looks mean nothing… Maybe I’m still half-asleep. That’s right, I’m still tired and—“_

“Tony?” Bucky knocked gently on Tony’s forehead, laughing when Tony finally looked up at him. “You okay?”

“What? I mean…why wouldn’t I be?”

“Well, I just called your name about three times and I’m not quite sure you heard me.”

“I’m…not fully awake yet.”

“Oh. Well, I could make us coffee. You have a coffee pot up here, right?”

“Yeah…coffee is in the cupboard above the machine.”

“All right, I’ll do that while you finish waking up,” Bucky said with a chuckle; Tony tried to ignore the way his heartbeat accelerated when the other man laughed.

“Sounds good.” Tony watched as Bucky left the room. Once the door had closed behind him, Tony stared blankly at it for a moment before rolling over and burying his face into a pillow. He caught a whiff of Bucky’s cologne that lingered on the linen and he slammed his fists down against the mattress in frustration.

_“I am so screwed.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Cupid shot someone's heart. ;)


	36. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Being an adult really sucks because you have so many responsibilities and apparently writing the fanfic you obsess over in your mind doesn't count as one of those responsibilities. Ugh, sorry it has been so long, guys! Next one shouldn't take me nearly as long. Enjoy the chapter! :)

Tony mumbled aloud to himself as he paced around inside of his large shower, rubbing his face in frustration.

“You finally make a good friend who understands your nightmares **_and_**  lets you cuddle with him whenever you want, and you have to go and fall in love with the guy—wait,  ** _love_**? No…no one said anything about love—it’s just a crush…I mean, it’s not my fault he’s hot as hell…oh God, but when he smiles and gets excited about little things like donuts or soft blankets…” Tony stopped under the steady stream of hot water, sighing deeply. A moment later, he slapped the dreamy look right off his face.

“Stop it, Tony… What you have going is too good to ruin. Ex-lovers never remain friends…Well, Pepper and I have, but she’s **_Pepper._** Anyway, he is definitely not interested. I mean, I can pretty much attract anyone I want, but Bucky’s practically straight out of the ‘40s… the guy didn’t even realize what people might think if they knew we slept together…no way he’d ever look at me in that way….” He frowned, the realization that he had absolutely no chance with Bucky bothering him far more than he cared to admit to himself. “Listen, you’re just going to have to ignore how ridiculously good-looking he—“

“Hey, Tony?” The genius whirled around at the sound of Bucky’s voice. Through the fogged up glass of the shower walls, he saw the vague shape of the door opening as Bucky stepped into the bathroom.

“Bucky?” Tony sputtered as he stuck his head out of the shower door.

“Hey, I just came to tell you the coffee’s ready. And Peter’s mixing up pancake batter right now too.” The man said, completely oblivious to Tony being flustered by his lack of clothing. The genius opened his mouth to berate Bucky for walking in without knocking, but when he saw how happy Bucky was, his features softened into a smile.

“Okay…I’ll be out in a minute.” The man nodded before disappearing from the bathroom, and Tony groaned as he leaned against the wall.

_“Oh, I’ve got it bad.”_

* * *

 

After Bucky’s interruption, Tony had deemed it necessary to turn his hot shower into a cold one, and though it had effectively calmed him down, it left him freezing cold. The man was still shivering as he walked out of his room five minutes later, dressed in flannel pajamas with a towel draped over his head like a hood. As he strolled down the hallway, he could hear Peter and Bucky laughing, and the sound caused him to smile.

“Hey, what have I said about having fun without me?” Peter spun around with a large grin on his face.

“We were just warming up for all the fun we’d have once you ** _finally_** got out of bed.” The teenager said before turning back to the stove in front of him and flipping a pancake.

“Oh, well I suppose that’s all right then.” Tony walked up behind Peter and put his hands on the boy’s shoulders as he looked down at the skillet. “Since when were you so good at making pancakes? Last time we made them together, they looked terrible!” Peter turned around briefly to stick out his tongue.

“May helped me. She showed me how to make them round and how to flip them without messing up the shape.”

“Ah, Magic May. Is there anything your beautiful aunt can’t do?”

“Nope. She’s perfect—an angel among men, really.” 

“You’re starting to sound like me."

“I know. It drives May crazy.” Tony chuckled in amusement as Peter turned back to his pancakes. “Go sit with Bucky, I’ll bring the first batch over in a second!”

“I don’t get to help?”

“Nope! Go relax.”

"Oh, all right." Tony leaned forward to kiss the back of Peter’s head before he released the boy’s shoulders. As he turned around to head to the table, he stopped in his tracks when he met Bucky’s eye. Clearing his throat, Tony quickly began to dry his hair with the towel still on his head, moving it in front of his face as he felt his cheeks grow hot. He sucked in a deep breath before slipping on an all too familiar mask of composure. Once Tony was sure that his cheeks were no longer flushed, he dropped the towel to his shoulders.

“Poured you a cup,” Bucky said as he motioned to a full mug on the table. Tony sat beside the man and hastily grabbed the hot beverage. Normally, anyone who gave Tony coffee would be praised as “an angel straight from Heaven”, but the words caught in his throat, so he opted to smile at the man instead.

“Thanks, Bucky.” The large man nodded in acknowledgment as he took another sip of coffee, but he quickly set his mug back on the table when Peter placed a plate of hot pancakes in front of him.

“Wow, these look delicious. Thanks.” Bucky said, his eyes sparkling with excitement as he looked down at the food. Tony smiled up at Peter as the teenager set a plate in front of him, though the moment the boy’s back was turned, his eyes were back on Bucky. He bit his bottom lip as he watched Bucky spread butter onto the pancakes and drizzle some warm maple syrup over the top before eagerly cutting into his breakfast. After taking a bite, Bucky’s face lit up as he leaned back and let out a satisfied groan.

“These are wonderful. I love pancakes. Peter, these are so good.” Bucky gushed as he took another bite, humming softly as he did so. Tony side-eyed the man before stabbing in frustration at one of his pancakes and shoving a forkful into his mouth.

_“Should be illegal for him to make those damn noises,”_ Tony grumbled to himself before grabbing his coffee and gulping it down.

“I didn’t know you liked any food so much,” Peter said, clearly pleased that Bucky liked the pancakes. “You never seem that excited to eat.”

“Oh sure, I love food…just not used to all the fancy stuff you eat today. The frosted donuts and Pad Thai and burritos—they’re real good, but I never had anything like it before… but these pancakes…they taste like…uh…home, I guess.”

_“’They taste like home’? He’s killing me. Actually killing me. What was comfort food back in the 40s? Meatloaf? I don’t know, but I need to find out.”_

“Whoa, I’ve never seen you eat so fast before!” Upon hearing Peter’s exclamation, Tony looked down at his plate in surprise to find that he had already polished off three-quarters of his breakfast without realizing it. “I’ll make you more!”

“Nope! I, uh, I ate that fast so that I could make some for you. Sit down.”

“Aw, Tony, you never rest.”

“Says the boy who was doing backflips on my bed the morning after being shot. Sit down.” Peter sighed dramatically and flopped onto a chair, causing Bucky to chuckle. Tony tried not to pay attention to the way that Bucky’s nose crinkled up when the man laughed; he failed miserably.

“Can we go work on my new suit after we eat?”

“I suppose that could be arranged,” Tony said as he turned around and poured some batter into the pan.

“Bucky, you should come hang out with us. Tony doesn’t mind, right?”

“Well, I don’t know if—“

“Okay, I’ll come.” Tony whirled around in surprise as he looked at Bucky.

“Bucky, we’ll be in my lab.”

“Yeah…I know.” Tony stared at Bucky in confusion for a moment before turning back around to flip his pancakes.

“Fine by me…but we’re not going downstairs until you eat an entire stack of pancakes,” Tony said as he waved his spatula in Peter’s direction.

“Oh, trust me, that won’t be a problem.”

* * *

 

As soon as they entered the lab, Peter eagerly ran over to the workbench where Tony had laid out the boy’s half-finished suit. Tony grinned as he watched Peter excitedly examine every inch of it, praising every tiny little detail that had been added. Suddenly, Tony felt Bucky’s large chest press against his back and he gulped nervously as he turned to look at his friend, for once hating that the man had little concept of personal space. When he caught a glimpse of Bucky’s face, his thoughts turned to worry and he gripped the man’s arm before glancing at Peter to make sure the teenager was still distracted by the suit.

“Bucky, why don’t you go upstairs? I’ll make some excuse for you.”

“No. I want to try…can I…can I sit on that sofa?” Bucky asked softly as he gestured to the couch in the far corner.

“Of course you can…” The twinkle had all but disappeared from Bucky’s eyes, but he still wore a small smile as he walked to the couch.

“Can I move it?” Peter asked excitedly as he turned to look at Tony.

“Yep, everything I’ve done so far is fastened properly. Bring it over so we can take a look at it together.” Tony said as he sat on a stool near his workbench and motioned for Peter to join him. The teenager wasted no time in following orders, and soon, he and Tony were lost in their work—well, Peter was. Tony was too distracted by Bucky to slip into hyperfocus*. Every few minutes, he would steal a glance at the man in the corner. He was partly worried about Bucky and partly admiring how handsome the man looked lying on the couch.

_“He belongs in a museum,”_ Tony thought to himself as he turned his attention back to his work and began to make an adjustment to Peter’s suit. _“I mean, I always knew he was handsome, but...”_ He stole another glance at Bucky before averting his eyes once again. _“How did I never notice he was **that** handsome?”_ Tony slipped back into an internal debate, one half of himself desperately trying to list all the reasons liking Bucky would only bring him trouble, while the other half put in earplugs and swooned over the man. He shook his head as if it would help clear his mind, trying to think of anything except for Bucky. Of course, that lead to Tony fixating exclusively on Bucky.

Suddenly, something cold touched Tony’s arm, and the genius jumped in surprise as he was startled from his thoughts. Peter looked up and began to laugh as Tony clutched at his heart while Bucky stood beside the man with a dumbfounded expression on his face.

“You almost jumped to the ceiling!” Peter teased. Bucky, who looked terribly guilty, reached out to gently rub Tony’s back.

“Sorry, Tony…didn’t mean to…to scare ya.” The genius nodded as he pulled away—Bucky rubbing his back was doing the opposite of calming him today—and he took a deep breath before forcing a laugh.

“It’s all right. I tend to get lost in my thoughts down here.”

“That’s why I always have to remind him to eat,” Peter added.

“Oh…I was…was just wondering i-if I could watch you guys.” Tony hadn’t heard Bucky stammer that much in quite a while, and it caused him to frown.

“Of course!” Peter said quickly, and Tony nodded in agreement as he motioned toward a stool beside him.

“Grab a seat.” Bucky wasted no time in sitting down and he leaned over Tony and Peter’s work, curiously asking questions about what they were doing. Peter began to explain to Bucky some of the things they were adding to his new suit while Tony stared at his friend, wanting nothing more than to wrap him up in a hug.

_“How can he stay in a place that triggers so many bad memories and so much anxiety? He’s really trying so hard, isn’t he?”_

“Tony? ….Tony?”

“Huh?” The genius asked as he was once again distracted from his thoughts.

“I don’t really know what this is going to be?” Tony leaned forward for a closer look at what Peter was motioning to before he responded.

“Oh that’s a nanotech compartment…in the off chance that your new suit **_does_** get comprised, it will be able to repair itself within seconds.”

“Really? That’s so awesome!” Peter said excitedly. Tony raised an eyebrow as he noticed the mischievous glint in Peter’s eye.

“I don’t want you and Ned purposely damaging the suit so you can watch it self-repair.” Peter looked up, his mouth opened in a surprised “o” shape.

“How did you know I was thinking about that?”

“Because it’s what I would have done at your age,” Tony replied with an amused smile. “You can bring Ned over when I test that feature of the suit out. Hopefully, that will be enough to satisfy your curious minds.”

“Really? Ned can come hang out in your lab with us?”

“If you want him to.”

“Dude, he’s going to be so excited he might wet himself!”

“Just make sure he does that in the hallway then,” Tony said. Peter laughed, and Bucky laughed too—though his laugh was a nervous one.

“You’re so quiet,” Peter noted as he glanced in Bucky’s direction. The man shrugged off the observation as he leaned his elbows on the workbench.

“It’s the weather…makin’ me sleepy.”

“Go take a nap.”

“The kid’s right. If you’re tired, take a nap.” Tony said, trying to give the man an out. Bucky stubbornly refused, and neither Tony nor Peter pushed the matter, electing to quietly return to their work as Bucky continued watching them. A few minutes later, Tony noticed that Bucky was slowly scooting closer to him. He bit back a small smile before reaching out under the workbench to give Bucky’s thigh a reassuring squeeze. Out of the corner of his eye, Tony watched Bucky visibly relax at the comforting touch, though Tony had to quickly remove his hand when the devil on his shoulder tempted him to slide his hand just a **_little bit further_** up Bucky’s thigh.

Just as Tony had finished calming himself down ** _yet again_** , the silence was broken by the shrill squeal of a small drill. The sound was not loud, but it clearly terrified Bucky, who jumped up from his stool, looking around with fear-filled eyes. Peter and Tony both looked up in surprise, and Bucky laughed nervously as his gaze shifted to the floor.

“Think I, uh…just gonna go find Steve.” Bucky said before quickly leaving the lab. Peter raised an eyebrow and turned to look at Tony.

“Is he okay?”

“I don’t know, Pete,” Tony answered honestly.

“Should we go after him?” Peter asked with a worried frown. As much as Tony found himself wanting to chase after the other man, he shook his head in response.

“No…he’s going to find Steve; if there is a problem, he’ll be fine.”

“I guess that’s true.” The pair returned to their work, and even though the man was no longer distracting Tony with his presence, Tony found that he still had trouble focusing on anything except for Bucky.

* * *

 

Bucky remained jumpy for the rest of the day. After leaving Tony’s lab that morning, he went and found Steve and Sam, choosing to spend the rest of his day with them. Though the presence of his other friends had helped to distract Bucky from his anxiety, his uneasiness had not been alleviated. Bucky found himself wanting Tony; Tony would understand why he felt so distressed. Bucky knew the other man would recognize his anxiety, and even a simple pat on the shoulder from Tony would help him feel less isolated—less different.

When dinnertime finally rolled around, Bucky whipped his head toward the elevators every time they opened, but when the entire lounge was almost full and there was no sign of Tony or Peter, Bucky turned to Steve.

“Did Tony and Peter tell you what they want to order?”

“No, I think they’re eating with May tonight.”

“Oh…that’s right,” Bucky said, feeling his heart sink a bit. Peter had mentioned it to him the day before, but he had completely forgotten.

“Why? Am I not good enough for you anymore?” Steve teased, and Bucky laughed as he shook his head.

“I guess you’ll do.”

“Hey!” Bucky grinned as he ducked his head to avoid a swat from Steve. As they waited for their food to arrive, the two joked around with Sam, who exchanged insults with Bucky every chance he got. Once dinner had been delivered, all of the Avengers continued to talk amongst themselves as they ate, and Bucky listened quietly as he picked at his food.

After everyone had finished eating and several others had already left the lounge, Thor suggested a movie. Though not particularly in the mood for a film, Bucky absolutely did not want to be alone, so he curled up beside Steve as the movie started. Exhausted by the sheer amount of anxiety he had experienced that day, Bucky fell asleep on his best friend’s shoulder only twenty minutes into the movie. The Captain smiled and covered Bucky with a blanket, allowing the man to sleep on his shoulder until the end of the film. As everyone headed off to their own floors for the night, Steve carefully lay Bucky on the couch and put a pillow under his head, spreading another blanket over his friend before he headed off to bed.

* * *

 

Tony sat up with a start, his heart pounding heavily. He was only halfway through one of his recurring nightmares, but when he looked over to his left, Tony found that he was alone. If Bucky had never come to bed, what woke him up?

“Boss,” Tony jumped at Friday’s voice, putting a hand on his chest as he realized the voice belonged to his AI, “I’m sorry to disturb your sleep, but you said to wake you if the sergeant was hallucinating again.”

“Bucky? Where is he?”

“In the lounge, Sir.”

“Thanks, Fri,” Tony said as he quickly got out of bed. Still trembling, he headed into the elevator, nursing his arm as the lift carried him to the lounge. When the doors opened, Tony stepped out and looked around curiously. Not seeing anything, he walked closer into the dimly lit room before spotting Bucky on one of the couches. He headed closer to the man, squatting down beside him as he tried to rub the sleep from his eyes.

“Hey, Bucky, let’s go back t—“ In one fell swoop, Bucky had flipped Tony over and slammed him onto the couch, using his metal arm to pin Tony down. Startled, Tony looked up at Bucky, immediately recognizing by the distant, scared look in the other man’s eyes that he was confused by his surroundings.  “Bucky? Hey, it’s me. It’s Tony. You’re okay.” The super soldier did not seem to understand him, and Tony reached out to slide his hand up Bucky’s arm. “Earth to Bucky Bear. Wake up.” Bucky stared down in confusion at the gentle touch, and Tony continued tenderly stroking the other man’s arm until the uncertainty in Bucky’s eyes was replaced with recognition. Bucky gasped as he fell backward and tears instantly formed in his eyes.

“Tony,” His voice trembled as he hugged his Vibranium arm close to his chest, rocking slightly as he stared at his friend. “I-I’m not going to hurt you. Did I hurt you? I don’t want to hurt you.” Tony sat up and reached out toward Bucky, who recoiled at the touch. Tony immediately backed away, it being obvious that Bucky thought he was about to be punished.

“No, you didn’t hurt me.” Relief was evident on Bucky’s face, though fear once again darkened his features.

“Tony, I don’t want to hurt you.”

“I know. Let’s go upstairs.” Bucky immediately shook his head at the suggestion.

“I’ll go to my room.”

“Bucky…” The super soldier did not respond as he walked toward the elevator. Tony knew that the man was scared of hurting him, but he also knew that Bucky needed someone. His own nightmare forgotten, Tony sighed and rubbed his face as he realized there was only one way that he would be getting the larger man to go upstairs with him. He took a deep breath before quickly moving forward and stepping into the elevator behind Bucky.

“Barnes, my floor. Now.” Tony said with a steely edge to his voice, leaving no room for discussion as he stared coldly at the other man. Bucky’s eyes widened and he nodded in compliance. Bucky clearly could not recognize that Tony was not upset with him, and Tony hated that he used that knowledge to manipulate the man into submission.

_“It’s for his own good… I know he doesn’t want to be alone right now_ …” Tony told himself as he watched the other man stare at the floor of the lift as if he were trying to bore a hole through it with his eyes. He started to reach out when he saw a single tear roll down Bucky's cheek, but quickly dropped his hand and decided to wait until Bucky calmed down before trying to touch him again.

Once the elevator reached his floor, Tony stepped out and waited for Bucky to follow him through the apartment. When they reached his room, Tony motioned for Bucky to enter before him, the man hesitating before he stepped inside. Tony followed, shutting the door behind himself before pointing at his bed.

“Lay down.”

“No, I can’t! I—“

“I’m not listening to a word you say until you’re in bed.”

“But, Tony—“

“Now.” Bucky stared at Tony for a moment before moving to sit on the very edge of the bed. He looked down at the ground for a moment before glancing up at Tony. After a brief silence, Tony felt sick to his stomach as he realized that Bucky was waiting for permission to speak.

“I thought you wanted to say something?”

“…I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Yes, I know.”

“So I shouldn’t be here.” He said as he stood up. Tony stepped closer and gently pushed the man back onto the bed.

“Do you want to be alone right now?” Bucky hesitated before slowly nodding his head to indicate that he did. Tony pursed his lips. “Don’t lie…I thought you trusted me.”

“I do! I don’t trust myself.”

“Doesn’t matter. I trust you.”

“I almost hurt you.”

“No, you didn’t.” Bucky’s brow knit in confusion.

“You pushed me down because you were scared, but you didn’t make a single move to hurt me. If I thought you were dangerous, do you think I’d let you sleep here?” Bucky did not respond. After a long silence, Tony walked around to his side of the bed and lay down before glancing over at the other man. “Come on, I’ll hold you tonight.”

"I-" He had been trying so hard to tell himself that he wasn't a monster, but fully waking up to find Tony pinned beneath him had Bucky questioning everything all over again. Still, Tony hadn't seemed scared in the slightest. A warm sensation filled Bucky's heart as he recalled how gently Tony had been touching his arm even after he had been roughly treated.  

"Hurry up, Barnes. It's cold in here."Bucky hesitated for a few more seconds before he could no longer resist the temptation. He crawled straight into Tony’s arms, clinging to the safety he had been craving since leaving the lab the morning prior.

Tony tried to ignore the way his heart skipped a beat when Bucky’s face pressed into his chest, and he wrapped Bucky up in a tight hug. After a moment, Tony looked down at the top of Bucky’s head, gently untangling the elastic that had half fallen out of his hair. Tony ran his fingers through the man’s long hair, smoothing the thick locks back before re-fastening it into a ponytail. Bucky tilted his head slightly in order to look up at Tony, who momentarily forgot how to breathe when their eyes met.

_“My God, he’s beautiful.”_

“Why do you trust me?”

“What?” Tony asked, the question catching him off guard.

“I know why I trust you; it’s obvious why I trust you…but why do you trust me? After everything I’ve done, what makes you think I won’t accidentally hurt you? The Soldier might be gone, but his training isn’t.” Tony looked straight at Bucky. Noticing that the same blue-grey eyes that had been sparkling with laughter the morning before were now red-rimmed and filled with a lifetime of pain. The look in Bucky’s eyes was one of silent pleading—he wanted an honest answer. Not a cop-out, not an excuse—just one good reason why anyone would ever be able to fully trust him. Tony thought for a moment before finally responding.

“I don’t blindly trust others. You earned it from me through your actions—and that’s not something that’s easy to do.” Bucky was silent for several moments before he swallowed nervously. He looked back up at Tony, opening and closing his mouth a few times before he finally spoke.

“Can we listen to music while we go back to sleep?”

“You want to hear your girl?” A small smile settled on Bucky’s lips as he nodded. “Friday, play Dinah Shore. Something soft, hm?”

“Yes, Boss.” Friday started by playing the song she had learned long ago was Bucky’s favorite. Almost immediately, Bucky's eyes fell shut, and the man nuzzled into Tony's shoulder; he was out almost instantly. Tony, however, lay awake for the rest of the night and listened to Dinah Shore, too distracted by the man in his arms to ever drift back off to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *If you are unaware, hyperfocus is an intense concentration that many people with ADHD experience-usually when they are doing something they are passionate about. Tony Stark has [severe] ADHD; no one can convince me otherwise. 
> 
> This was supposed to be *part* of Chapter 36, but I had to split it up because the chapter got too long. Hopefully, 37 will go up this weekend. I hope this chapter was worth the wait. ♥


	37. Chapter 37

Tony had been lying awake for hours. He tried to go back to sleep after bringing Bucky back to his bed, but his mind was far too active. Tony had also tried to calm down by focusing on Bucky's music, which was still softly playing in his room, but eventually had Friday turn it off over an hour later. Finally, the man opened his eyes and looked down at the man snuggled up against him, a dreamy sigh escaping his lips.

 _“Bucky’s so big and warm...and he’s pretty. So pretty… I wonder what he thinks when he looks at me. I doubt he thinks about my appearance, but does he ever get excited to see me? I wonder if he’ll ever love me as much as he loves Steve.”_ The thought of the Captain made him bristle slightly, and he frowned as he stewed in jealous thoughts. Though he secretly adored the Captain, he also found himself resenting the man. _“It’s not fair that he got Howard **and** Bucky. They both love him more than me.”_ Tony’s thoughts spiraled out of control, cycling between adoration for Bucky and sadness at the thought that the man would never return his feelings. Vexed both by his inability to think of anything unrelated to Bucky and by being unable to fall asleep, Tony squeezed his eyes shut as he felt tears of frustration begin to form. He hugged Bucky just a little bit tighter, relieved that the man was not awake to witness how needy he felt.

By the time the sun was beginning to rise, Tony had managed to somewhat stifle his overbearing thoughts, though they had left his anxiety going in full force; the fact that he hadn’t had an uninterrupted night of sleep in days was not helping anything. Any other night, Tony would have been down in his lab hours ago, using his work to distract himself from the torment his mind created. However, he just couldn’t stand the thought of Bucky waking up to find him gone—Tony knew how worried Bucky was of frightening him away.

Bucky mumbled something unintelligible as he began to move in his sleep, and Tony opened his eyes to look down at the man, wondering if he was having a bad dream. Bucky shifted away for a brief moment before rolling closer, his head gently butting Tony’s chin as his right arm fell over his friend’s side. Bucky’s hand ended up resting directly on Tony’s waist, where his shirt had ridden up at some point during the night, causing Tony’s breath to hitch in his throat as the feeling of Bucky’s fingers brushing over the exposed skin of his waist sent a jolt of electricity through his body. A soft gasp escaped Tony’s lips, and he quickly rolled out of the man's grasp with his back to Bucky as he attempted to calm himself down by thinking of absolutely anything else.

The sudden movement partially roused Bucky from his sleep and the man cracked open an eye to look around. Clearly not okay with his source of body heat being on the other side of the bed, Bucky scooted closer, spooning Tony from behind as he started to drift back off to sleep. Tony sucked in a sharp breath as his entire body tensed up.

 _“Oh god, please don’t touch me.”_ Bucky half-opened his eyes at the sound of Tony’s gasp.

“It’s just me, Doll…”

_“How dare you call me that with your sexy morning voice.”_

“Thank you…for last night.”

“Uh, why…” Tony cleared his throat as he tried to scoot a tiny bit closer toward the edge of the bed and away from Bucky. “What’re you thanking me for?”

“For making me feel safe…and normal, I guess,” Bucky opened his eyes completely as he started to fully wake up. “You sleep okay?”

“Yeah, I…” Tony trailed off as Bucky once again snuggled up against his back. “I slept like…uh, like a…a…”

“Baby?” Bucky asked in amusement as he laughed softly into his friend’s ear. Tony, who was so aroused that it had started to become physically painful, could no longer handle the other man’s husky voice and soft touches. After deciding there was only one way for him to make his escape without Bucky watching, he quickly rolled onto the floor, dragging all of the blankets with him. He groaned in pain as he hit the ground before hurriedly standing up and throwing the blankets onto Bucky’s face.

“Oops, I hate when that happens. Up now though. Guess I’ll shower.” He said, biting his bottom lip as he made his way to the bathroom as quickly as possible. Bucky sat up and pulled the covers off his head just in time to see the bathroom door slam shut.

“Tony, you okay?”

 _“Absolutely not.”_ “Just dandy!”

Bucky chuckled as he reached up to rub the remaining sleep from his eyes before turning to glance at the clock on Tony’s nightstand, surprised to see that it was just before six o’clock. Too alert to fall back asleep, the thought of hot coffee spurred him out of bed. Bucky stifled a yawn as he headed toward the kitchen, blissfully unaware of the torture to which he had subjected Tony. 

* * *

 

“Did you fall asleep in the shower?” Bucky teased good-naturedly, already halfway through his second cup of coffee by the time that Tony entered the kitchen. “Don’t worry, I kept the coffee warm since you took so long.”

 _“Yeah, and whose fault is that?”_ Tony thought to himself as he shuffled over to the counter, pouring coffee into a mug that Bucky had left sitting out for him. “Thanks…guess I’m just tired.”

"You said you slept like a baby...You didn’t have a nightmare, did you? Even if I had one, I wish you’d still wake me up.” Tony took a sip of coffee as he moved to sit across from Bucky, immediately noticing the worry in the other man’s eyes. Bucky’s concern gave him the same warm feeling he got whenever Peter referred to him as “dad”, and a smile softened his features.

“I didn’t have a nightmare. Just a lot on my mind, I guess. Don’t look so worried—I promise you’ll be the first to know if I wake up screaming.” Bucky laughed at the remark before taking a sip of coffee.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Huh?

“What kept you up last night.”

“Not really.”

“Fair enough.” Bucky said, though Tony couldn’t help notice that the other man almost seemed disappointed by the answer. Thinking he read too much into the Bucky’s expression, Tony waved the thought away before changing the subject.

“You know, I still haven’t heard anything about your back pay. I’ll call my lawyer later and see what he can tell me.”

“Don’t worry too much about it. I’m sure that your lawyer has a lot more important things to be doing.”

“I wouldn’t know. Pepper deals with most of that stuff these days. Still gonna call him...I can’t believe you won’t even let me buy you a damn phone.”

“I don’t really need one. Peter lets me talk to Shuri on his.”

“You know the kid only lives here during the summer, right? He goes back to school in a few weeks and then he’ll only be here weekends.”

“Oh…guess I forgot.” Bucky’s face fell, and Tony couldn’t blame him; he didn't want to think about being unable to see Peter every day either.

“Yeah…anyway, what about me?”

“What about you?”

“You could talk to me on a phone.”

“But I’ll still see you every day.”

“Sure…but I’ll be busier once summer ends. I begged Pepper into giving me a break over the summer so that I could spend more time with Pete. I’ll have to go to more meetings and make appearances at events and what-not… if you had a phone, you could text me so I don’t die of boredom.”

“I don’t know how to send the written messages on a phone…”

“It’s not hard. You’ll learn fast.”

“Do you think I could get a phone that has those little emoji pictures in it?”

“Every phone has those,” Tony said, chuckling in amusement as he looked over Bucky’s face.

“Oh, really?” Bucky asked with a sheepish grin. “I’m still learnin’.” Tony finally began to relax as he and Bucky fell into their usual, comfortable banter. The two talked for nearly an hour before an alarm sounded throughout the kitchen.

“It’s Director Fury, Sir,” Friday stated seriously as she interrupted the pair’s conversation. “He is—“

“Why didn’t that alarm go off in my room?” Peter asked as he stumbled into the kitchen, his eyes comically wide. Tony ignored the boy’s question, though he lovingly wrapped his arm around Peter’s waist as the teenager moved to stand beside his chair.

“What’s going on, Friday?”

“There is a threat that requires the Avengers’ assistance. Unfortunately, I cannot provide further information as Sergeant Barnes is not privy to additional details.”

“That’s fine. The others are on their way to the helipad?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Let them know I’m on my way.” Tony said as he stood up.

“Don’t you mean ‘ ** _we’re_** on our way’?” Peter asked, causing Tony to raise an eyebrow.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“Spiderman’s an Avenger too!”

“All right, Spiderman. What suit do you plan on wearing?”

“My new one…”

“Wrong answer.”

“But we finished it last night!”

“It’s not finished until we’ve had a chance to test it. You’re not going anywhere today.”

“Aw, c’mon. You know everything is going to work!”

“Peter,” Tony said, a warning tone clear in his voice.

“Bucky, back me up! I should be able to go, right?”

“Don’t drag me into this!” Bucky protested as he put his puts his hands up. Peter huffed as he turned back to Tony.

“You’re **_Tony Stark_**. You don’t make mistakes.” Tony folded his arms across his chest as he stared at Peter.

“I want you to think about what you just said for a moment…Did you think about it? Good. Now I don’t ever want to hear anything that stupid come out of your mouth again.” Peter sulked as he looked down, and Tony stepped forward to put a hand on his shoulder. “We’ll test your suit when I get back. If everything’s fine, you can go out on patrol tonight, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Good.” Tony squeezed Peter’s shoulder and turned to leave before glancing at Bucky. He stopped in his tracks and looked back to Peter. “Use your card and take him to go get a phone today, huh?”

“Tony—“ Bucky started to interject, but Tony cut him off.

“Nope, we’re not discussing it. You’re getting a phone. Today.” The genius left no room for further protests as he left the room without looking back. “Have fun!”

* * *

 

“Hey Peter, what are those little moving pictures called again?”

“Gifs?”

“Yeah. How do I send one to Shuri?” Peter leaned over and directed Bucky to the gif database.

“Some suggestions pop up, but you can search for something too. Know what you wanna send?”

“I want to send one with a puppy on it.”

“Okay, then use your keyboard on the screen to type in ‘puppy’,” Peter said. Bucky did as instructed, beaming when several gifs of puppies appeared on the screen. “Just tap on the one you want and hit the ‘send’ button. That’s it.” Bucky did as instructed before turning to look at Peter.

“Did she get it?”

“It went through. Just gotta wait until she sees it and sends you a message back.” Bucky nodded before rolling onto his side and holding his phone out to Peter.

“Can you put in Tony’s number?” Peter did not hesitate to take the phone, grinning as he created a new contact for Tony.

“I’m glad Tony has you now. You know, I have to go back to school soon so I can’t be here during the week…”

“Yeah, Tony was talking about that earlier.”

“Yep… you know, I’d be really worried about him if you weren’t here.”

“Why?” Bucky asked curiously as he looked at Peter, who pretending to continue entering Tony’s contact information though he had already finished.

“Tony doesn’t take good care of himself. He has bad dreams and he works too hard and he forgets to eat. He worries about everyone except himself.”

“…That does sound like him.”

"And he obviously trusts you...he lets you sleep with him...and he let you borrow one of his expensive watches." 

"Huh?" Bucky asked as he looked down at his wrist. "This is one of Tony's watches?"

"Whose did you think it was?"

"Well, I...I just asked Tony if he could make me a tracking device...so that if uh, something ever happened...I could be found. He gave me this." Peter grinned from ear-to-ear. 

"Bucky, tracking devices are usually just simple bracelets...Tony must have used it as an excuse to give you something nice." The man's eyes widened as he looked down at his watch. 

"Well, why would he do that?"

"He loves giving gifts to people that are special to him."

"Tony thinks I'm special?" Bucky's cheeks darkened ever so slightly at the thought of being considered special by anyone, and Peter watched the man carefully. "But...should I give this back? I didn't realize...and the phone too. I don't want Tony to think I'm just friends with him for his money. 

"He won't. I felt the same way at first, but then Miss Potts told me it makes Tony really happy to give gifts—especially when people get excited about them. There's a difference between asking for and expecting things versus receiving something as a gift and being grateful.

"I suppose that makes sense..."

 "Mhmm...so anyway…you’ll take good care of him when I go back to school?”

“Well, yeah—of course, I will, Kid,” Bucky said with a chuckle. Peter smiled as he handed the phone back to Bucky.

“All finished. What are you going to message Tony first?”

“Should I send him one now? I just saw him a few hours ago.”

“That doesn’t matter. Sometimes Ned and I text each other when we’re in the same room.”

“Why do ya do that?”

“Why not? Text Tony.”

“All right, all right.” It took Bucky a few moments, but he finally pulled up the screen he needed in order to send a message. Peter watched over the man’s shoulder as he typed and shook his head.

“‘Dear Tony’? Bucky, a text isn’t like a letter. Haven’t you seen how Shuri and I chat? Send a casual message like that.”

“Well, I wasn’t sure if that was just how you guys talked…okay, I can do that.” Bucky paused briefly before typing out a short message. When he finished, he looked back at Peter. “This okay?”

“My new phone is lit. FYI it’s Bucky,” Peter read aloud, trying very hard to suppress a giggle. “That’s great.”

“Tony said all phones have the little emoji pictures? How do I put one in?”

“You can just call them emojis, Bucky,” Peter said as he showed Bucky how to bring up the list of small icons. Bucky scrolled before choosing the star eye emoji.

“I like this one.”

“Oh, that’s good. Add a heart too.” Bucky furrowed his brow as he looked back at the screen. When he found the heart emojis, he looked back at Peter.

“Why are there so many? Do they all mean different stuff?”

“Oh, the meaning isn’t that important,” Peter said, dismissing the question quickly. “Which one do you like the most?”

“The blue’s nice…oh, wait, I like this one with the little twinkles on it.”

“The sparkle heart? Oh, yeah. That’s _perfect_.”

“Okay,” Bucky said as he added the second emoji to the message and then sent it. “There!” Bucky was clearly proud of himself, and Peter grinned as he reached out to pat him on the back.

“See? It’s not so hard. Is there anyone else you want to text?”

“No, I’ll get Steve’s number when he comes back. I only ever see him look at his phone when he’s orderin’ dinner anyway... unless you have Sam’s number?”

“Oh, sure do.” Peter took Bucky’s phone back to enter the contact information. “What do you want to send him?”

“I want to send him one of those…is it me-mes?”

“Memes.”

“Oh, right. One of those.”

“I’ll help you find one to send him. Do you want it to be funny, or—“

“Do you know the one where the guy is holding his hands up like he’s whispering? And it says, ‘I’ll kill you.’?”

“The Michael Scott meme?” Peter asked as he burst into laughter.

“I dunno who that is, but based on your reaction, I think we’re talking about the same one.” Peter already had the image pulled up by the time Bucky finished speaking, and the man giggled softly as Peter turned the phone to show it to him. “That’s it! Send that to Sam!” Peter did not hesitate to send off the meme before he collapsed against Bucky, laughing so hard that tears began to form in his eyes.

“I wish I could see Sam’s face when he opens up that message from an unknown number!” Peter said after he finally caught his breath. Bucky laughed mischievously as he looked back at the meme.

“Think they’ll be home soon so we can hear him complain about it?”

“I sure hope so…but I don’t know for sure. Anyway, let’s eat lunch, I’m starving!” Peter said as he hopped up from Bucky’s bed. “We could just make sandwiches. Think there’s stuff in the lounge for ham and cheese… and I know there’s stuff for peanut butter and jelly on our floor.”

“Ham and cheese sounds real good.” Bucky said quickly, excited at the thought of eating something he hadn’t had in so long.

“Perfect…you wanna race for the elevator?” Bucky stood up, clutching his new phone tightly in his hand.

“If you’re not afraid of losing.”

“Big talk from the old man that lost last time.”

“I was tired that night.”

“Ready then?” Bucky nodded with determination as he turned to face the door. “GO!” The two charged out of Bucky’s room and toward the elevator, neck-and-neck for almost the entirety of the race. When they reached the elevator and hit the door at the same time, they turned to look at each other.

“Who won?” They asked in unison. After a brief pause, Bucky looked up at the ceiling.

“Miss Friday, did ya see who won?”

“It appears that you touched the door a split-second before Peter did, Sergeant.”

“Oh, come on!”

“I’m sorry, Peter.” Friday said, and Bucky grinned.

“Thanks, Doll,” Bucky said before looking back at Peter. “Guess I’m not so old after all, huh?”

“Yeah, yeah.” Peter said with a laugh as he pushed Bucky into the now-open elevator.

“Can’t wait to tell Tony that I beat you.” Bucky said as he glanced at Peter with a smirk. Peter raised an eyebrow before smiling smugly to himself.

_“Making them realize that they're perfect for each other is going to be easier than I thought.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was so fun to write. 
> 
> Also, if you're a fan of Seb—yes, I did put the "me-me" line in there on purpose. lmao


	38. Chapter 38

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, all! I'm so sorry it's been a long time since my last update-I've been in the middle of packing and moving/finishing up my job/applying for new jobs/and a lot of other annoying adult stuff. I didn't expect to stop posting, but the stress contributed to writer's block. That being said, I'll definitely have more free time to write now, so look forward to that. :)

As the Avengers headed back to the aircraft, Steve turned to Natasha.

“When’s Clint coming back?”

“His kids go back to school in two weeks.”

“Good. We’ll be needing him.”

“I simply do not understand why these Hydra agents caused such a huge ado. They were understaffed and guarding a lot of their top secret information. It was terribly sloppy of them.” Loki observed, but Tony shook his head.

“That’s just it. Hydra isn’t sloppy. They must have wanted us to come here for a reason. They’re up to something, I just can’t figure out their angle.”

“You think all the documents SHIELD confiscated were planted here? Maybe with misinformation to distract us?” Steve asked as he looked at Tony who frowned.

“I don’t know. None of it makes sense. This is the second time they’ve gone up against us without being prepared. They’ve lost a lot of manpower...” Tony tapped his arc reactor, his suit disappearing back inside of it as he stepped into the aircraft. The man walked into the cabin and dropped onto a seat in the aircraft, rubbing a hand over his face. Natasha moved to sit beside him, concern etched into her features.

“Did you get hurt?”

“No…didn’t really sleep well the past few nights. I’m just tired.” Tony said, his shoulders slumped as he stifled a yawn. Natasha studied him for a moment before patting her lap gently.

“Lay down.” He looked at her in surprise, and she chuckled. “Hurry, before I take back my offer.” Tony wasted no time in laying down across the seats, resting his head in Natasha’s lap as he grinned up at her.

“Ms. Romanoff, do you have a soft spot for me?” Natasha laughed softly, shaking her head as she looked down at Tony.

“Do you see the others getting invitations to invade my personal space?” The response pleased Tony, and his smile widened as Natasha grabbed her phone. “Why don’t you rest? I’ll wake you up when we get back to the tower.”

“Mhmm…just want to make sure I don’t have any important messages,” Tony said as he shifted to pull his own phone from his pocket. He held it over his face as the screen lit up, scrolling through various notifications until his eyes immediately fell upon a text from a number he did not recognize.

“ **My new phone is lit. FYI it’s Bucky.** 🤩💖"

When he read the message that had come from Bucky, he giggled softly. Natasha looked down with a raised eyebrow and Tony nonchalantly returned the look. “Peter sent me something funny.”

“Mm.” She acknowledged with an amused smile before returning her attention to her own phone. Tony bit his bottom lip as he reread the message, his eyes focusing on the little pink heart at the end of the message.

_“What the hell does that mean? I mean, they had hearts in the 40s, it’s not like he doesn’t know the meaning…Of course…I bet Peter had something to do with it. That’s all…right? But how should I respond? Should I send a heart back?”_ After a moment of thought, Tony decided against it, quickly typing out and sending his response:

**Good, glad you got it. Oh, and FYI, you’re about 85 years too old to say anything is “lit”.**

After re-reading his message, he began to wonder if it sounded too harsh. He mentally kicked himself, hoping that Bucky wouldn’t misunderstand his well-intended jab. Tony closed his eyes, fidgeting nervously as he tried to fall asleep.

“What the hell is this?” Tony half-opened his eyes and turned to look at Sam, who was holding his phone up in front of Steve.

“That’s one of those memes Peter’s always talking about.”

“I know that, but what kind of asshole is sending me this? I don’t know this number. ‘I’ll kill you’? Yeah, I’d like to see you try.” Sam muttered. Tony bit his bottom lip, trying to keep from laughing as he listened to the conversation; he knew exactly who had sent that meme. Suddenly, his phone vibrated and he picked it up a little too quickly, audibly sighing in relief when he read the response from Bucky.

**That’s right. I’m 100 and slaying. Try again, sweaty.** **😘**

_“Geez,”_ He groaned internally, though he was relieved that Bucky hadn’t misunderstood his teasing.

**Tony: Is Peter texting on your behalf?**

**Bucky: 75%**

**Tony: Tell him he’s not funny.**

**Bucky: He is crying now.**

**Tony: Wait…is he really? Tell him I didn’t mean it.**

**Bucky: No he wrote that. He is laughing.**

**Tony: Tell him he’s a little shit.**

**Bucky: lAnGuAgE**

**Tony: Peter, give Bucky his phone back.**

**Bucky:** **L Meanie**

**Bucky: Jk Tony ily** **♥**

**Bucky: Is your mission over? I want to show you my new phone.**

Tony smiled to himself as he read the last message. Bucky being excited to show him his new phone was absolutely adorable

**Tony: Yeah, we’ll probably be back in an hour or so.**

**Bucky: Okay 😄**

Tony shoved his phone back into his pocket and put his hands over his face. Maybe getting Bucky a phone wasn’t his best idea; it just gave the man even more ways to drive him crazy.

“Something wrong?” Natasha asked as she tapped gently on Tony’s hand. The genius quickly removed them from his face and shook his head.

“Just…blocking out the light.” Natasha opened her mouth to respond, though she didn’t get the chance as Nicky Fury and Maria Hill walked into the aircraft, the doors closing behind them as the pilot was preparing for takeoff.

“All right, Listen up, People. I am already going to be late for an important meeting, so we’re going to do our debriefing here to save time.” Everyone moved into the center of the cabin and Fury looked at Tony.

“Were you planning on sitting up?”

“No, I actually wasn’t.” Natasha giggled softly before clearing her throat and trying to look serious as Fury stared at the two of them. After a brief moment, he simply shook his head and proceeded with the meeting. Tony listened carefully, though he decided to close his eyes when he felt them grow heavy a few moments later.

_“I’ll just rest my eyes while I listen.”_

* * *

 

Tony bolted upright with a loud gasp. His arms instinctively went up to cover his chest as his widened eyes darted around the room. Confusion furrowed his brow, and for a split second, he wondered how everyone got into his bedroom.

“Was it really necessary to awake him with a beating?” Loki asked, glancing in annoyance at Fury as he moved closer to Tony. Fury cast the god a look of irritation.

“I hit his leg—stop being dramatic.”

“You quite nearly gave Anthony a heart attack.”

“You okay, Tony?” Steve asked in concern as he reached out to put his hand on Tony’s shoulder. Though his heart was still racing, Tony laughed.

“Why are you all looking at me like that? If Fury beat you awake, you’d look like this too.”

“For the second time, I didn’t beat—“ The Director stopped as he saw Tony smirking up at him. “Can we finish our meeting now?”

“Don’t let me stop you,” Tony said as he lay his head back in Natasha’s lap. Fury stared, unamused, at Tony.

“Get your ass back up.” Tony blinked in surprise before begrudgingly sitting back up.

“I’ll allow that only because I don’t think I can trust you not to hit me again.”

“There’s that genius everyone’s always talking about.” Tony narrowed his eyes as Natasha laughed softly beside him.

“All right, so we were recapping the mission...” Tony said and Steve chuckled beside him.

“We’re past that, Tony. We were discussing our theories as to ** _why_** Hydra seems to be playing these games with us.”

“That’s still bothering me. I can’t seem to think of a reason to justify their irresponsibility. We all know that Hydra isn’t careless…but I can’t think of a reason for the games.”

“I think it’s a distraction to keep us away from their main attack,” Sam said and Nick shook his head.

“I already told you that there were no other security threats or acts of hostility reported elsewhere during this attack or the last.”

“Perhaps they are simply showing off,” Loki suggested. “They may have no real mission. Could it possibly be that they are trying to prove you cannot completely destroy their organization?”

“If it’s a pride thing, then losing miserably each time can’t be doing much to make them feel better,” Steve said and the others nodded in agreement as Tony spoke up again.

“Maybe they’re trying to lull us into a false sense of security? Purposely make it really easy the first few times, and then suddenly they’ll pull out all the stops.”

“That’s the most plausible theory that I’ve heard yet.” Fury said as he looked at Tony. “But for now, we cannot confirm or deny anything, so I want all of you to be on your guard at all times. Watch for anything suspicious, and don’t forget that uninvolved friends and family members are to stay uninvolved. Not a word of this to anyone. Understand?” The Avengers all nodded in agreement as Fury held up his hand. “Oh, and one more thing. Tony has finished making tracking devices for everyone. I want you to wear them during missions so that you can easily be located at all times.

“Yep, they’re in my lab. I’ll make sure everyone gets them tonight...well, great meeting everyone.” Tony said with a clap of his hands.

“Great for you...you slept through the whole thing,” Sam muttered after Fury had wandered to the far end of the cabin to make a call.

“I just want to know how you were so alert one minute, and snoring loudly the next,” Natasha said as she looked Tony over quizzically.

“Alert? I haven’t been alert for three days.” Tony mumbled. He turned to the side and covered a yawn with his hand, leaning slightly against Steve as he did so. As he moved, he caught a glimpse of Loki from across the room. The god seemed far too pleased with himself, and Tony raised an eyebrow in suspicion. “Loki!”

“Yes, Anthony?”

“Did you have anything to do with everyone thinking I was awake?”

“I cannot control someone’s thoughts.” Tony watched Loki’s face with a raised eyebrow.

“That’s not what I asked.” The god shook his head and laughed mischievously.

“You were clearly tired, Anthony. They had no idea you were asleep until you started snoring.”

“Wait, he fell asleep at the beginning of the meeting, but you made it look like he was awake the whole time?” Sam asked, clearly intrigued.

“Something like that.”

“Hey, show me how to do that.”

“No.”

“Oh come on, Man. I could use that. Is it a trick only gods can do?”

“Humans are quite capable. However, you remind me too much of that one. Too righteous” Loki said as he pointed at Steve who, much to Loki’s amusement, rolled his eyes in irritation. “You need a bit of mischief in order to make any trick convincing. Why do you think Thor cannot do magic?”

“What a kind thing to say, Brother.”

“Did that sound akin to a compliment? Hm, I must have said it wrong.”

“Not that this witty banter isn’t delightful, but I’m exhausted. Wake me up when we get back to the tower.” Tony said as his head dropped back onto Natasha’s lap. Moments after closing his eyes, Tony felt Natasha drape a sweater over his chest before he quickly drifted off to sleep for twenty minutes of much-needed rest.   

 

* * *

 

As he heard the elevator doors opened, Peter quickly sat up and turned around to see the Avengers stepping into the lounge.

“You’re finally back!” Peter exclaimed. “What happened? No one got hurt right?”

“Everyone’s fine, Peter,” Thor said with a large smile as he walked over to join the teenager and Bucky on the couch. “I think Tony will have to fill you in on the rest a bit later though.” The god said as he glanced at Bucky.

“Oh? **_Oh_**. Okay!” Thor leaned forward to ask the pair about their day, and Bucky looked distractedly over the back of the couch as Peter answered the god’s question. The man glanced towards the others who were slowly making their way over to the couches or walking into the kitchen, but he frowned as he saw everyone except for Tony enter the lounge.

“Hey, Buck. How was your day?” Steve asked as he walked toward his friend.

“Oh, it was fun,” Bucky said as his friend brought his mind back into focus. “Take it you can’t tell me about your mission?”

“Sorry, you know that I wish I could.”

“I know.” There was a brief lull in their conversation, and Steve moved to sit on the sofa perpendicular to Bucky.

“Tell me about your day. What did you do with Peter? I seem to have missed the first part of a very exciting story.” Steve said with a chuckle as he looked at Peter who was deeply engrossed in the story he was telling Thor. Bucky listened to Peter for a moment before laughing.

“He’s talking about a game we were playing. It’s actually really crazy. You put these things on your head and you can talk to other people who are also playing the game. But there was this one kid we talked to, and I guess he’s Thor’s enemy or something. Hey, Peter, what was that guy’s name?” Bucky asked as he turned to interrupt the teenager’s story.

“Noobmaster69.”

“Oh, yeah. Thanks. Noobmaster69.” Bucky said as he turned back to Steve.

“Noobmaster69?”

“A ‘noob’ is like a tenderfoot I take it. I’m not sure if ‘noobmaster’ means he is the master of all the noobs, or if he is the number one noob.” Bucky mused, and Steve couldn’t help but chuckle at his friend’s thoughts. “Peter laughs every time he says ‘sixty-nine’, but he won’t tell me why that part’s funny. You got any idea? Shuri didn’t teach me that.”

“Beats me,” Steve said with a shrug. “So this kid is Thor’s enemy?”

“Uh, he’s my rival. There is a difference.” Thor interjected.

“Thor, how old is he?” Steve asked with a raised eyebrow.

“I know only that he is a worthy opponent…but you guys did cause some harm to fall upon him?” Thor asked with a twinkle in his eye. The three men listened as Peter finished his dramatic re-telling of the gameplay and how he and Bucky had defeated the other player.

A few minutes later, Tony silently walked over to their group with a small box, grabbing Thor’s arm as he slid a thin, grey bracelet onto the man’s wrist. Bucky perked up instantly at the sight of Tony but remained silent as to not interrupt Peter. The teenager, however, noticed Bucky’s reaction and hurriedly finished his story.

“…and that’s really how we ended up tricking him into falling for our plan,” Peter said with a grin.

“Catch, Cap,” Tony said as he tossed a bracelet to the man.

“This the tracking device?” Steve asked as he caught the object.

“Yep. Wear it now. I have all the trackers turned off. It’ll be quicker if everyone has them on at all times. Won’t track you guys unless we’re on a mission. Scout’s honor.”

“I didn’t know you were a boy scout, Tony.”

“Oh, I wasn’t.” Steve gave Tony an unamused look as the genius attempted to hold back a laugh. Bucky looked between the bracelet on Steve’s wrist down to the handsome watch on his own wrist.

“I told you,” Peter whispered as he nudged Bucky’s side. The idea that Tony was showing him even a small bit of favoritism please Bucky tremendously, and he laughed shyly as he looked back at the watch.

Tony set the empty box down onto the coffee table before he slid to the ground, his back resting against the arm of the couch as he leaned against Bucky’s leg. Steve watched, surprised at Tony’s choice of places to sit.

“You gonna show me?” Tony asked as he looked up at Bucky, suddenly grateful for the exhaustion that was keeping his confusing emotions at bay.

“Sure thing.” Bucky shifted, pulling his new phone from his pocket before handing it to Tony. The genius took the phone and turned it over in his palm before letting out a low whistle.

“Excellent choice. I think that—“Tony stopped as his finger tapped the screen, causing it to light up with a picture of Spiderman swinging off a building. “Nice lock screen.”

“He won’t show me how to change it.”

“Peter!” Tony reprimanded, though he was giggling as he did so.

“What? I thought he would appreciate it!”

“Show him how to change it.”

“Fiiiine.” The boy said as he snatched the phone from Tony and held it up for Bucky to see.

“Buck,” Steve interrupted. “You didn’t tell me that you got your back pay.”

“I didn’t yet,” Bucky said, looking at what Peter was showing him on the phone’s screen.

“But the phone…”

“Tony didn’t give me a choice,” Bucky said, looking up with a smile.

“It’s ridiculous that he didn’t already have one.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hold up. You got a new phone?” Sam asked as he abruptly left a conversation with Bruce and Wanda to approach the others.

“Sure did.”

“So you’re the one sending me threatening memes then, huh? Think that’s funny?” Bucky and Peter both attempted to keep a straight face; they both failed.

“I didn’t send it,” Bucky said as he laughed. Peter snickered and Sam rolled his eyes.

“So I’m getting threatened by Spidey from your phone?”

“Hey, Bucky told me exactly what meme to send. I just sent it for him!” Peter protested. Bucky smiled smugly up at Sam who narrowed his eyes at the pair.

“I’m going to be watching you two,” Sam said as he stepped over Tony to go sit on the couch beside Steve. As Sam settled beside the Captain, Steve noticed that Tony’s head was leaning against Bucky’s knee and the man was picking at lint on the leg of Bucky’s sweatpants.

_“I knew they were on good terms now, but when did they become such good friends?”_ Steve thought as he looked at the two. If it were anyone else, Steve wouldn’t give the action a second thought—Tony invaded everyone’s personal space. What really shocked Steve was that Bucky, who was quite distant with almost everyone since his return to New York, seemed to be completely comfortable with Tony practically hugging his leg. A tiny pinprick of jealousy invaded Steve’s thoughts, and the man waved it away. It was **_good_** that Bucky had more friends—whether he liked it or not.

* * *

 

Tony had fallen asleep against Bucky’s leg, waking up only long enough for Steve to take his dinner order before he had drifted off again. Once the food had arrived, Tony managed to wake up enough to eat half of his meal, clapping his hands together once he had finished.

“Okay, Kid. Let’s go work on that suit.” Tony said to Peter as he started to stand up. Peter shook his head quickly.

“Let’s do it tomorrow. I want Ned to see you test the nanotech, but he’s busy tonight.”

“Oh yeah? Okay, that’s fine.” Tony said as he dropped back to the ground. Peter knew that the only thing Ned was busy with was bingeing a new show on Netflix, but Tony was clearly so exhausted that Peter just couldn’t ask him to work on his suit.

“Why don’t you come sit up here with us? We can make room.” Peter said as he scooted up against Thor, leaving just enough room for Tony to squeeze in between himself and Bucky. Tony shook his head and smiled.

“I’m fine down here. Don’t want to get too comfortable. I’m actually a little tired so I might head to bed soon if you don’t want to work on the suit.” Tony said offhandedly as if no one had realized that he was exhausted. Bucky leaned forward, balancing the throw pillow he had been hugging onto Tony’s head.

“Want a pillow?” Tony turned to look at Bucky, who was grinning down at him, before pulling the pillow off his head and using it to smack the man in the face.

“What have I said about the hair?” Bucky quickly yanked the pillow out of Tony’s grasp as he scowled down at the man. The others cast a worried glance in their direction, but Tony just smirked up at his friend; he knew Bucky was only playing. Everyone watched in surprise as the icy glare of the Winter Soldier melted away, a warm smile softening his features.

“Punk.” He said as he gently smacked Tony’s shoulder with the pillow. Tony chuckled, taking the pillow back before tossing it onto Peter’s lap.

“Keep this away from him.” He said as he went back to leaning against Bucky’s leg. Steve clenched his jaw as he watched Bucky gaze fondly down at Tony, actively trying not to succumb to the childish irritation growing inside of him. Natasha glanced between Steve and Tony, raising an eyebrow as she caught the look of displeasure on Steve’s face.

“How’s everyone feel about a movie?” She asked, quickly grabbing the remote. Everyone nodded in agreement, and soon a lighthearted comedy was playing on the large screen in front of them.

Only ten minutes into the movie, Tony found himself once again struggling to stay awake. He wanted nothing more than to sleep, but the thought of going upstairs to an empty bed seemed terribly unappealing. Tony removed his cheek from Bucky’s knee, turning slightly to glance up at the man who was completely enthralled in the movie.

_“He looks so comfy.”_ Tony’s eyes wandered over Bucky’s broad chest, and he momentarily considered straddling Bucky’s lap and falling asleep on his shoulder. _“Bet he’d let me. Probably carry me to bed too.”_ The thought made his heart skip a beat, and Tony quickly shoved the thought from his mind as he turned back to the movie. _“I must be near the point of insanity if I actually considered crawling up onto Bucky’s lap—especially in front of the others. I need to go to bed before I do something stupid.”_ Tony scrambled to his feet and Peter looked over.

“Going to bed?”

“Mhm. Can’t stay awake.”

“Sleep well, Tony,” Thor said, and the others briefly glanced toward Tony to wish him a good night as he shuffled into the elevator. The genius mumbled a soft good night in return before the doors closed behind him and he leaned against the wall of the elevator as it carried him away from the lounge. When the lift reached his floor, Tony managed to drag himself to his bed, falling asleep mere seconds after his head hit the pillow.

* * *

 

One by one, the Avengers began to leave the lounge for the evening. By the time the movie ended, only Natasha, Steve, Bucky, and Peter remained.

“It’s still early, but I think I’m going to go to bed now so I can get up to work on my suit,” Peter said as he slowly got up from the couch. “Bucky, you coming?”

“Huh?” Bucky’s eyes widened as he looked up at Peter.

“You left your blanket in my room earlier…told me you’d get it before bed?” Peter said as he tilted his head.

“Oh. Oh yeah.” He said as he realized what Peter was doing. “I’ll come get it. Guess I’ll head off to bed then since I’m up.” Steve smiled at his friend.

“Night, Buck. Night, Peter.”

“Good night, Boys.” Natasha chimed in from across the room. She watched Peter and Bucky enter the elevator before she stood up and walked over to Steve, sitting down beside him.

“Talk.”

“Anything in particular you’d like to discuss?” Steve asked with a chuckle.

“You giving Tony the evil eye all night.” Steve’s smiled disappeared and he looked down at his hands.

“Oh, was it that obvious?”

“Uh, yeah. You’re lucky that Peter didn’t notice.”

“Tony didn’t do anything. I’m not really mad at him… I should be thrilled, y’know? I was the one who fought for Bucky to be here. Tony was so against it, but now he and Bucky are friends.”

“Yeah, you should be thrilled. So what’s up?” Natasha asked as she looked over Steve’s face. The man was silent for several moments before shaking his head.

“Bucky’s different. Sometimes he’s like the Bucky I grew up with, and other times he isn’t. I get that now. He’s been to Hell and back; it’s bound to change a guy. I guess—it just happened so fast. Bucky doesn’t need me as much as he did.”

“Steve, that’s a good thing. It means he feels safe here.”

“I know. I’m glad he feels safe and I’m really glad that he seems happy. I just didn’t realize how close he and Tony had become and I guess it took me off guard. I always hoped they would be friends, but I never really thought they would be.”

“And now that they are, you’re upset?”

“I’m not upset…I am happy. I just didn’t expect them to get close, and—“

“Oh my god.”

“What?”

“You’re jealous of Tony.” Steve looked to the side silently before shrugging his shoulders. Natasha furrowed her brow, silent for several moments before she spoke again. “No…you’re jealous of both of them.” Steve glanced back up at Natasha, sighing softly.

“Guess I am.”

“Why?”

“I don’t really know.”

“C’mon, Steve. How can you not know?” The man thought quietly before speaking again.

“I suppose that I’m not as close to either of them as I once was. Bucky and I did everything together. I tried to give him his space when he wanted to be alone, but apparently, he spends all that time with Tony…and well, Tony and I haven’t been as close for a while now. You saw how friendly they were tonight—Tony all over Bucky’s leg and Bucky was clearly fine with it.”

“Steve, enough of the pity party. Everyone in this tower knows that Tony is physically affectionate. You saw him fall asleep on me earlier and didn’t seem to have any problem with it. You had a problem with it because he fell asleep on Bucky. Their friendship was surprising, but it seems to be helpful. Since they started spending time together, Bucky seems less scared of everything and he even talks occasionally. You were his security blanket. He needed someone else to bring him out of his comfort zone.”

“…I guess you’re right. I didn’t push him.”

“Mhmm,” Natasha said as she stood up and tucked her hair behind her ear. She turned to leave before glancing back over her shoulder at the Captain. “I still don’t know exactly what went down between you and Tony, but when trust is broken, words are never enough to repair it.” Natasha smiled softly at her friend before turning and heading to the elevator. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Thanks, Nat,” Steve said. The woman nodded without turning around, stepping into the elevator to leave the Captain alone with his thoughts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bucky is so soft ;A;


	39. Chapter 39

Tony slowly opened his eyes, attempting to blink away the sleep before he turned to bury his face into Bucky’s neck. Upon realizing that he was clinging to the man, Tony quickly attempted to pull away. However, he found that he could not easily move, the super soldier’s Vibranium arm wrapped tightly around his waist to keep him close.

“You awake?” Tony looked up at the sound of Bucky’s gentle voice to see the man smiling down at him.

“Yeah…how long have you been up?”

“Dunno. A while.” The dark circles under Bucky’s red-rimmed eyes were unmistakable, and Tony scowled.

“You had a nightmare and didn’t wake me up?” Surprise was written across Bucky’s face before a sheepish smiled found its way onto his lips.

“I’m okay.”

“Why didn’t you wake me up?”

“Well, you were so tired…”

“Bucky!” Tony’s eyes widened as he felt Bucky’s arm tighten around his waist, and the super soldier laughed softly.

“Promise I’m okay. Still made me feel better. You make a pretty decent Teddy bear.”

“I—I’m not a Teddy bear.”

“Oh yeah, then what are you?”

“Not a Teddy bear.”

“I don’t know, you’re awfully cuddly.” Tony could feel his cheeks flush and he jabbed a finger into Bucky’s side.

“Take that back.”

“Nope.” Bucky laughed, clearly having fun teasing Tony. The genius wriggled out of Bucky’s grasp and rolled back onto his side of the bed, his back facing the super soldier.

“Fine. I’ll be over here when you’re ready to recant your statement.”

“You’ll be back,” Bucky said smugly. Tony raised an eyebrow and glanced back over his shoulder.

“How can you be so sure?”

“Because it’s cold in here…and you’re a cuddly Teddy bear.” Tony rolled his eyes and dropped his head back to his pillow as he looked at the wall.

“I have plenty of blankets to keep me warm—“ As Tony was speaking, Bucky yanked all of the covers to his side of the bed. Tony sat up halfway, turning in surprise to look at the snickering super soldier. A playful smile curled up on the corner of Tony’s lips and he reached out to grab the blankets.

“You think this is funny, huh?”

“Maybe just a little.” Tony attempted to steal the blankets from Bucky, but the large man held them tightly against his chest with a smirk. Squinting his eyes determinedly, Tony gave the covers another pull, slightly loosening them from Bucky’s grip. Within moments, the two men were laughing as they engaged in a full-blown battle of blanket tug-o-war. Though physically stronger, Bucky had a difficult time keeping a firm hold on the fabric with his metal fingers. Tony eventually tumbled backward, taking the blankets with him. Bucky rolled toward Tony’s side of the bed to make a grab for the duvet, but Tony quickly pulled it from his grasp. Without thinking, Tony dove forward, pushing the man back onto his side of the bed and pinning him down.

“Told ya you’d be back,” Bucky said as he smirked up at Tony. All at once, the genius realized that not only was he _on top_ of Bucky, but he was straddling the man’s waist and pinning his wrists over his head. Though it was nothing more than good-natured roughhousing to Bucky, Tony suddenly found himself extremely turned on, and he quickly crawled off the man and rolled back to his side of the bed before his body caught up with his brain.

“Smart ass,” Tony mumbled as he pulled the blankets over himself, and Bucky laughed as he looked at his friend.

“Hey, now I’m cold. You gotta share.” Tony glanced sideways before tossing half of the blankets back over Bucky.

“And for the record, if either of us is a Teddy bear, it’s you. That’s why you’re 'Bucky Bear'. I called it first.”

“I’m not sure it works that way.”

“It most certainly does.”

“…Fine then,” Bucky began after a brief silence, “if that’s the way it works, then I want a hug.”

“You’re awfully demanding for a Teddy bear,” Tony said with a chuckle. However, as he looked over Bucky’s face, he noticed that the man’s playful expression had been clouded by something darker. Concern replaced Tony’s arousal, and he reached out to touch the other man’s arm. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing…I just want a hug.”

“Well, come here then.” Bucky didn’t have to be told twice, immediately rolling over and sliding his arms around Tony’s waist as he buried his face in his friend’s shoulder. Tony embraced him, tilting his head so that it leaned against Bucky’s. “You sure you’re okay?”

“Guess so.”

“You sound less certain than you did a minute ago.” Bucky was quiet for a few moments before he responded.

“I’m fine now.”

“You sure?” Bucky said nothing, though Tony felt the other man’s grip on him tighten. “…Did you feel like you were **_there_** again?” Bucky nodded his head against Tony’s shoulder, and the genius sighed. “Damn it, Friday. I told you to wake me up if—“

“Don’t be mad at Miss Friday. She tried to wake you up, but I stopped her.”

“Bucky…” Tony exhaled, trying not to let the exasperation he felt be heard in his tone. “I still don’t know the extent of what they did to you, but when you dream about it, you need to wake me up. We’ve talked about this. Isn’t that why you sleep up here with me? Stop acting like you’re all alone. Be a little selfish.” Tony stopped speaking, and the room fell quiet for several moments before Bucky broke the silence.

“Y'know, I don’t remember everything, but…it, uh…was always cold. Usually didn’t really get to wear much of anything…no blankets either. They always strapped me down before I woke up…never…I didn’t ever get to move. Not until Winter had taken over…” Bucky trailed off for a moment, but Tony remained silent as he sensed the other man was not finished. He instinctively began to rub Bucky’s back in a soothing manner as he heard him draw in a shaky breath. “My mind’s still a mess…everything’s jumbled…but I keep remembering more at night…I was there. I—I mean not just my body. They’d use those words…to bring Winter out…but when a mission was over…sometimes I’d come back. After the first mission—I think it was—I guess I don’t really know…I just remember blood on my hands…but it wasn’t my blood. I cried. They hurt me. Stopped remembering much after that…Remember them teasin’ me though. Askin’ me if I wanted stuff…they asked me if I wanted things they’d never give me. Nice things like warm milk or a blanket. Things I wanted real bad. They knew I couldn’t answer…and…and no one ever touched me…not the whole time I was there…not unless…not unless they were… they were, uh…in…in the lab—“ Tony listened patiently as Bucky stuttered out his story, but when the man’s voice cracked, he quickly interrupted.

“Why don’t you tell me the rest another time?” Bucky nodded quickly, and Tony hugged him just a little bit closer, anger burning inside upon learning more about how Bucky had been treated during his time with Hydra. Suddenly, Tony realized that his shoulder was damp with Bucky’s silent tears and he reached up to thread his fingers through Bucky’s long hair. “You’re safe now. You know that, right? You’re free. You can have all the nice things your heart desires. You can do whatever you want. No one’s going to hurt you anymore.”

“I—I know.”

“Then what’s wrong?” Tony asked tenderly. Bucky cleared his throat before answering with a shaky voice.

“Nothing.”

“If nothing’s the matter, why are you holding onto me so tightly?”

“Sorry.” Bucky started to pull away, but Tony pulled him back into his arms.

“I just asked a question, I didn’t tell you to move.”

“…I love living here. I get to be with you and Steve and Peter…and everyone else is so nice. Sam pretends to hate me, but I know he’s messing around…I’m still scared of Loki, but I don’t think…he won’t hurt me.”

“He won’t, but that doesn’t answer my question.”

“Used to think I didn’t deserve any of this. Still not sure, but I try to believe it. I want to…I'm happy. My life is really perfect now.” Tony raised an eyebrow in surprise as he listened. “Got a family again…nice place to live…you even gave me the pretty watch and the phone…Sometimes I just get so scared that it’s going to go away; I’ll wake up to find that I was never even here at all. As long as I touch someone, I can know it’s real since no one ever touched me there.”

_“I can’t believe this sweetheart spent an entire lifetime being used as an assassin and a lab rat. Tortured, frozen, and then tortured again. Not a loving touch for seventy years…it’s a marvel he’s as sane as he is…if I ever come across anyone who hurt him...”_

“So that’s why you’re always touching one of us,” Tony mused before gently tapping Bucky’s shoulder. “Hey, look at me.” Bucky reluctantly pulled away just enough to look at Tony with teary eyes. _“Gosh, he’s beautiful.”_ Tony thought to himself. Without a second thought, he reached up, using his thumbs to gently wipe the tears from Bucky’s cheeks. “You can feel that I’m real, can’t you?”

“Yes.”

“This isn’t a dream. You’re safe.” Tony said as he stared into Bucky’s eyes. The tears started to spill down Bucky’s cheeks again and he removed his arms from around Tony in order to cover his face with his hands.

“I—I’m sorry…blubbering like a damn baby.”

“After everything you’ve been through, you could cry every day, and I’d still think you’re one of the bravest people I know.” Bucky peeked over his hands, astonishment evident in his eyes.

“You don’t think I’m weak?”

“Absolutely not.” Bucky wiped his eyes before staring at Tony’s chest, the soft blue glow emitting from the man’s arc reactor calming him. He gnawed at his bottom lip for a moment before looking back up at Tony.

“I hardly slept last night…I’m real tired. I know I should get up anyway…or at least go to my own room…but I…I don’t want to. I want to sleep here. I know you gotta help Peter, but would you stay with me just until I fall asleep?” Tony was taken aback by the request, unaccustomed to Bucky asking for anything.

“You got it.”

“Thanks.” Bucky closed his eyes and Tony reached out to squeeze his arm gently. "When you said to be selfish…you meant it, right?”

“I did. Think you need to brush up on how to be selfish though. This hardly qualifies.” Tony said as he watched the small smile of satisfaction that curled up on Bucky’s lips. He continued to study Bucky’s face for several moments, grateful for the opportunity to openly admire the super soldier’s handsome features. Nearly fifteen minutes later, Tony rubbed the man’s arm.

“Bucky? Hey, Bucky Bear?” When the man did not stir, Tony carefully detached himself from Bucky before slipping out of bed. He pulled the blankets up over Bucky’s shoulders, hesitating briefly before pressing a soft kiss to his cheek. Tony straightened up, clutching his chest as he tiptoed from the room.

_“I can't even remember if I loved Pepper this much.”_

* * *

 

“Dude, that’s insane!” Ned shouted enthusiastically as he watched Peter’s torn suit repair itself.

“Oh my gosh…I can do anything from now on…I’m invincible!” Peter squealed. Tony set a hand on Peter’s shoulder as he chuckled.

“Hold up there, Spiderman. You’re pretty amazing, but you’re not invincible. I want you to be just as careful wearing this suit as you were wearing those pajamas when you first started out. Just because the nanotech works, doesn’t mean you should test it out on any given day. Capisce?”

“Okay, Tony. I promise I’ll be careful!”

“Good boy. Well,” Tony began as he clapped his hands together, “I think we’ve tested every function of the suit. Did we miss anything, boys?”

“Nope!”

“I don’t think so!”

“All righty then, why don’t we go make some lunch?” Tony suggested. The always-hungry teenagers quickly agreed, and a moment later the trio was in the elevator and headed toward the lounge. A few moments later, the doors opened and Tony stepped out. “Why don’t you boys get a movie started up? I’ll throw in a frozen pizza or something.”

“Sounds good to me!” Peter said, and Tony chuckled as he watched Peter and Ned run ahead of him to jump on the couches. Tony stopped in the doorway of the kitchen, grinning as he saw Natasha look up at him from over her book.

“Hey, Nat. What are you up to?” Tony asked as he headed toward the freezer.

“Just doing some reading. Was planning on going somewhere more comfortable, but after I finished making my coffee I didn't want to move.” She said with a shrug as she put her book face down on the table. “Late lunch?”

“Yep, the boys and I just finished testing out Peter’s new suit. They’re starving, but I think they’ll have to wait. Hopefully, the movie will distract them a bit.” He said with a chuckle as he moved toward the oven to set the temperature. Natasha watched him, biting her bottom lip thoughtfully before glancing toward the lounge. Her eyes drifted back to Tony, and she smiled.

  
“Any new features on Peter’s suit?”

“Yeah. Several actually. Nanotech is the best in my opinion. It’s really going to reduce his chances of getting hurt. He needed some on his suit.”

“Good. I’m glad you added some…spending the rest of the day with the boys?”

“Yep, the boys are actually going to spend the night at May’s, so we’re just hanging out ‘til I drop them off,” Tony said as he unwrapped the pizza and dropped it onto a pan before sliding it into the oven.

“Oh, how is May?”

“She seems busy but happy,” Tony said as he pointed at the coffee remaining in the carafe. “May I?”

“Help yourself…hard to believe summer’s almost over, isn’t it?”

“Sure is. Not looking forward to it.”

“Me neither. You and Bucky sleep well last night?”

“Well, I did, but he—“Tony’s head snapped up and he looked at Natasha in astonishment as the woman smirked in his direction. Clearly flustered, Tony turned back around began to pour himself a cup of coffee. “How many times have I told you not to use your interrogation tactics on me?”

“Come on, Tony. You can’t blame a girl for wanting to confirm her theory.”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Time out. It’s not what you think—I swear.”

“Oh?” Natasha cocked her head to the side, and Tony stared at her for a moment before grabbing his mug and moving to sit beside her.

“How did you figure it out, anyway?”

“You two aren’t exactly subtle. Every morning you show up to breakfast together or within two minutes of each other—and if one of you doesn’t show up, the other doesn’t either. Plus, everyone can see how close you two have gotten. You’re just lucky the other guys are really lacking in the observation department—well, except for Loki. Don’t really talk to him, but I wouldn’t underestimate his powers of observation.”

“Okay, but it’s really not what you think. I mean, we _**are**_ sleeping together, but that’s it. Just sleeping.” Natasha narrowed her eyes as she studied Tony, causing him to sigh in exasperation. “Look, I have problems sleeping. Nightmares. He does too. We ended up bumping into each other down here a few times when we couldn’t drift back off, and soon we just hung out every night. Once, we accidentally fell asleep together on the couches. We slept really well. First time in who knows how long that I slept so well…so, I proposed we try it again, and he agreed. We both sleep a lot more now. That’s all there is to it. Simple really.” Natasha raised an eyebrow, and Tony scowled. “You don’t believe me?”

“No, I believe you.”

“Then why are you giving me that look?”

“Because it sounds like you two are pretty much in a relationship, and if you’re not careful, one of you might get hurt.” Tony sputtered indignantly, hoping his cheeks were not red.

“We’re both men, Nat. Neither of us are gay, and it’s purely out of convenience. If you think I’m going to hurt the guy—“

“It’s not him that I’m worried about.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Did you forget that I had already studied you before you ever even met 'Natalie Rushman'?”

“I had forgotten all about that alias,” Tony said with a chuckle. Natasha returned the smile as she reached out to touch his hand.

“Point is, I know that you’re not exclusively attracted to women. I don’t want you to get hurt if—“

“If I were to suddenly wake up one morning and realize that I’m hopelessly in love with him?” Natasha looked at Tony as he dropped his head. “That ship has sailed...it’s actually kind of a relief to admit it out loud.”

“Tony…”

“Don’t worry. I’m not going to do anything about it, and I’m fine with it. Not the first time I’ve dealt with unrequited love. As long as he and I keep the relationship we have now, I’ll be A-okay.” Natasha opened her mouth to say something before closing it and smiling silently instead.

“All right…but you can find me if you want to talk about it.” The offer warmed Tony’s heart, and he smiled as he looked back at his friend.

“Thanks, Nat… and, uh…you aren’t going to mention this to anyone else, right?”

“You know very well that it’s not the women in this tower, but the men, who spread the gossip.” Tony laughed and scratched the back of his head.

“Fair enough.”

“Go spend time with the boys. I’ll let you know when your pizza’s ready.” Tony stood up and put his hand on the table as he leaned to kiss the top of Natasha’s head.

“Thanks for worrying about me.” The woman smiled as she watched Tony straighten up and walk out of the room.

“Don’t mention it.”  

* * *

 When Bucky next awoke, it was nearly 2 PM. As he slowly became more alert, Bucky tangled his legs in the sheets while he stretched his arms over his head. After letting out a large yawn, he rolled back onto his side and snuggled back beneath the covers as he squinted at the clock.

_“Oh, it’s so late…”_ The man forced himself to sit up, his shoulders slumped as he rubbed the sleep from his eyes. _“I need a shower.”_

“Miss Friday, is the coast clear if I go back to my room?”

“At the moment, I don’t foresee you bumping into anyone, Sergeant.”

“Thanks, Doll,” Bucky said as he reluctantly climbed out of Tony’s bed. He quickly made his way through the apartment and into the elevator, wanting to make it back to his own room before anyone saw him. The moment the doors opened onto Steve’s floor, Bucky scurried down the hallway to his room, slipping into his room as quietly as possible. The moment he finished closing the door behind himself, Bucky shed his clothes and walked into the bathroom. Moments later, he sighed in satisfaction as a steady stream of warm water soothed his aching muscles.

_“Feels so good.”_ He thought as he smiled to himself. Bucky’s mind began to wander, and soon he was thinking about the conversation he had with Tony earlier that day. He paused for a moment upon remembering something that he had said to his friend. _“I told Tony I was happy...guess I hadn’t even realized it. But I think I really am… Being back with Steve is just like old times, but now there are even more people around us. And I don’t know what I’d do without Tony. He understands me like no one else—not even Steve.”_ Bucky unconsciously hugged himself as he thought. _“He never makes me feel stupid, and the guy gives great hugs…I think I should give him something. He’s given me so much. But what am I supposed to give a super-rich guy when I don’t even have any money?”_ Bucky kicked the floor of the shower in annoyance. _“Guess I’ll just have to think really hard about it.”_

A few minutes later, Bucky stepped out of the shower and wrapped himself up in a fluffy towel before walking back into his room. He changed into some of Steve’s old clothes before rubbing his towel over his head, wishing that he had thought to bring Tony’s hairdryer down to his room. Once his hair was no longer dripping, he wandered out of his room, hoping to find his best friend.

“Buck!” Steve exclaimed with a cheerful smile as he saw the man enter the living room. “You feeling okay?

“Mhm. Didn’t sleep well last night, but I slept this morning. Just woke up a bit ago.” Bucky said, choosing to ignore all of the other empty seats in favor of the empty couch cushion beside Steve.

“Sorry to hear that. Glad you finally got some rest though…You know you can come wake me up if you ever want company, right?” The offer made Bucky smile, and he nodded.

“I know.”

“Good.” Steve casually slung his arm around Bucky’s shoulders, and Bucky immediately leaned into the touch, resting his head on Steve’s shoulder. The action somewhat surprised the Captain, but he said nothing as he gently squeezed his friend. “Still tired?”

“No, I’m fine now…what are you watching?” Bucky asked as he squinted toward the television.

“It’s called Star Trek.”

“Wow, are they on a spaceship like in Star Wars?”

“Yep, but never mind that for now,” Steve said with a wave of his hand. “I’ve actually been waiting to talk to you.”

“You have? ‘Bout What?”

“Do you remember way back before the war? What did you want to do every Saturday night?” Bucky closed his eyes and thought for a moment before a grin spread across his face.

“I’d go dancing, of course.” He said as he opened his eyes and pulled back to look at Steve.

“Yes, and you’d always try to drag me along.”

“Was always more fun with you there. Besides, I was trying to help you get a girl.” Bucky said with a laugh. Steve chuckled and nodded.

“Yeah, I know. I know. Well, guess what? Tonight, I’m dragging you out to go dancing.” Bucky pulled back further as his eyes widened.

“Tonight? Everything else is so different…I just assumed no one did that anymore.”

“Most people don’t…but I did a little research and found a supper club that’s still open. Seems everyone there appreciates the time we’re from. I thought you deserved a night out.” A rush of excitement filled Bucky, though it quickly turned to anxiety.

“I don’t have a suit.”

“It’s okay, you can wear one of mine.” Bucky nodded before casting a worried glance at Steve.

“You think any girls will dance with me?”

“Buck…” Steve said as he looked at his friend in surprise, “since when have you ever worried about getting a girl?”

“Since I became an assassin with a metal arm.”

“That wasn’t you, right? Besides, they won’t even see your arm.”

“They’ll see my hand.”

“I’m sure they won’t mind. And if they do, well, they don’t deserve you anyway.” Bucky gave Steve a nervous smile.

“You always do this.”

“What?”

“Talk like I’m some amazing guy or something.”

“Well, you are an amazing guy or something.” Bucky laughed and nodded his head.

“All right, Stevie. I’ll go.”

“Good. In the meantime, you need to watch this show with me. I think you’ll like it.” Bucky wordlessly curled back into Steve as he turned his attention toward the TV, trying to ignore the uneasiness he felt about his first social event since the 1940s.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really enjoyed writing this chapter. Tony just keeps falling harder and harder for Bucky


	40. Chapter 40

Tony sped into the garage at the base of the tower, the tires of his cherry red convertible squealing as he pulled into a parking space. He turned off the ignition and grabbed his keys, tossing them up and down in his hand as he stepped out of the car.

“Welcome back, Sir.” Friday greeted as Tony headed into the elevator.

“Thanks, Fri.”

“Where would you like to go?”

“Uh…well, I don’t have too much to do now that the boys are gone…is Bucky still on my floor?”

“Sergeant Barnes is currently in his room, Boss.”

“Ask him if I can come up there.” There was a brief pause before the elevator started moving.

“The Sergeant said that you don’t need to ask permission.” Tony stuffed his keys into his pocket and hummed happily at Friday’s response. When the door opened a few moments later, he stepped out and followed the sound of soft jazz to Bucky’s room. He knocked on the door before opening it, taken aback by what he saw.

“Hey, Tony!” Bucky greeted as he turned to smile at the man. Tony watched as Bucky looked back at the mirror in front of him and continued to comb his long hair. Bucky was wearing a white button-down shirt tucked into navy slacks with a pair of brown Oxfords, and Tony suddenly realized that he had never seen Bucky dressed up; at least, not aside from old pictures in history books. As he stepped further into the room, the scent of the man’s cologne seemed to surround Tony, who struggled to keep his composure.

“Hey…uh, you look nice. You have plans?”

“Yeah, Steve and I are going to go dancing.”

“Oh…with each other?” Bucky laughed as he turned to look at Tony.

“Sure hope not. The plan is to dance with some pretty girls. Steve found a ‘40s style club. He thinks they’re supposed to play our kind of music and everything. Hey, you should come with us.”

“Oh, I don’t want to intrude.”

“Don’t be silly. Steve won’t mind. Come with.” The image of Bucky surrounded by beautiful women caused Tony to feel a pang of jealousy, and he shook his head.

“Maybe some other time. Got too much work to do tonight.”

“Oh. Okay…well, maybe you’re luckin’ out. Might not be any fun. If it is, you have to come next time, huh?”

“Yeah, I’ll be waiting to hear all about it,” Tony said as he watched Bucky tuck his hair behind his ears.

“Hey, Doll. Hand me my tie?” Tony’s cheeks flushed and he glanced around as if he expected to see someone else in the room. No matter how many times Bucky called him “Doll”, he wouldn’t get used to it. “Tony?” Bucky had turned to look at Tony, whose mind was wandering.

“Hm?” Bucky chuckled and pointed to the tie on the dresser.

“Can I have it?”

“Oh! Sure.” Tony said before grabbing it and tossing it to the man.

“Thanks!” Bucky said as he slung the tie around his neck and turned back to the mirror. Tony watched Bucky expertly fasten the tie as if he still wore one on a daily basis. However, Bucky was quick to get irritated when his metal fingers gave him trouble straightening the knot. Tony stepped forward, putting a hand on Bucky’s arm.

“Let me help.”

“Thanks.” As Tony began straightening the knot, he became hyperaware of Bucky staring down at him. “Tony?”

“Hm?”

“If you were a woman, would you dance with me?” Tony made the mistake of glancing up and getting lost in Bucky’s clear, blue eyes.

“I, uh. I guess I would.” Tony said before clearing his throat and reluctantly dropping his eyes back to the tie around Bucky’s neck. “Why are you asking?”

“I’m just worried…you know. Girls used to love me…but now I’m kind of a mons—“

“Don’t finish that word.” The worried crease in Bucky’s brow melted away as he smiled down at Tony.

“Fine. I’m a former assassin with a big metal arm…would you dance if I asked you?”

“In a heartbeat,” Tony said as he stepped back from Bucky. “There—it’s straight now.”

“Thanks,” Bucky said warmly before he turned to grab the navy blazer off his bed. He slipped it on and Tony’s breath caught in his throat because _damn_ ; Bucky looked good in a suit.

“I better head down to my lab. Got a lot to get done.” Tony said as he clapped his hands together. “Have fun tonight.”

“Thanks, Tony. I don’t think we’ll be back too late. If you’re still up, I’ll tell you how it went.”

“Looking forward to it.” Tony lied before heading out the door with a wave of his hand.

* * *

 

“You don’t look as excited as I thought you would,” Steve said as he and Bucky stepped out of the car.

“I’m nervous, Steve.”

“C’mon, Buck. A lot may change, but you still got the charm. You’ll be fine. If anyone should be nervous, it’s me.”

“Right. Because Captain America has absolutely **_nothing_ ** going for him.” Bucky said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. Steve chuckled and clapped Bucky on the back. “You’ll be fine. I promise. If you’re having a bad time, you just let me know and we’ll leave.”

“All right… let’s go.” Steve opened the door, and the two men stepped into the supper club. They had been inside for less than thirty seconds when the entire club went silent as everyone stopped to stare at them.

“It’s Captain America!” Within moments, Bucky and Steve were surrounded, and Bucky felt panic rise up inside of himself as people crowded around them. He tried to make himself smaller, but it didn’t work. Steve was clearly just as surprised as Bucky was, though he was handling it in stride. Bucky turned, ready to bolt out of the club when he felt someone grab his arm; he turned around to see a beautiful young woman holding it. She was looking at him curiously before her eyes lit up in recognition.

“It **_is_** you! Everyone, Bucky Barnes is here too.” Bucky froze, bracing himself for an onslaught of disdain, but none came. His eyes scanned the crowd of people who had turned to stare at him, and he wondered if they would curse him out. They seemed like polite people though; perhaps they would quietly ask him to leave. What Bucky did _not_ expect, was to be greeted with the same fervor that Steve had received.

“Gee, Steve Rogers and Bucky Barnes!”

“This is so exciting!”

“Two real heroes straight outta the ‘40s!” Steve turned to grin at Bucky, whose eyes were nearly the size of dinner plates. As Steve and Bucky were quickly whisked away to a large booth, the band started to play music, and everyone resumed their dancing, drinking, and socializing with the occasional glance of interest in the direction of the two super soldiers.

Steve and Bucky sat beside one another, surrounded by young men and women excitedly chattering and asking them questions. Steve leaned back and answered the questions, Bucky silently observing the group that had brought them to their booth. The men all had their hair slicked back and were dressed in suits as Steve and Bucky were. The women all had their hair coiffed in accurate 1940s fashion and were wearing not only lovely dresses, but also red lipstick and stockings. The band played an all-too-familiar song by Glenn Miller, and Bucky found himself relaxing, his surroundings transporting him back to a time before he was Hydra’s assassin.

“…and that’s how I found the place. Never was a great dancer, but Bucky here is the best. All the girls used to dream of him filling a spot on their dance card.” Steve finished explaining with a chuckle as he clapped Bucky on the shoulder.

“Is that so?” Asked a pretty blonde sitting near Bucky. “Come on, Sergeant Barnes. Won’t you dance with me?” Bucky was taken aback by the invitation, but a small smile settled upon his lips.

“All right, I’m afraid I’m probably a bit rusty though…”

“Oh, that’s all right.” The girl said with a kind smile as she stood up. Bucky stood up to join her, and an equally beautiful brunette looked up at him.

“Could I have the next dance?”

“Oh…sure you can.” The girl smiled excitedly, and Steve grinned as he watched the blonde lead Bucky to the dance floor. He took her right hand in his, hesitating as he reached out for her waist.

“What’s the matter? Don’t tell me you’re shy, Sergeant Barnes.”

“No, it’s…” He glanced down at his metal hand, and the woman followed suit.

“Oh, I had heard about your arm. Doesn’t have full range of motion?”

“No, it does…”

“Then what’s the problem?”

“I…well, do you mind?” He asked sincerely. The girl laughed softly.

“Of course not. Who would mind?”

“Oh, I just…didn’t want to make you uncomfortable.” The girl smiled and took his arm, putting it around her waist.

“There, that’s better. Now we can dance.” Bucky smiled as they began to dance before suddenly laughing in embarrassment.

“Gee, it’s been a long time since I’ve done this.” He said with a sheepish grin, “I forgot to even ask your name.”

“It’s Melody.”

“That’s a pretty name. I don’t think I’ve heard of anyone with that name before.”

“Really?” She asked in surprise. “It’s not so uncommon.”

“Well, I am a little behind in the times…” He admitted with an embarrassed chuckle. Melody laughed softly as she looked up at him.

“That’s all right…You know, I could help you catch up anytime you wanted.”

“Is that right?”

“That’s right, Sergeant Barnes.”

“Just Bucky.”

“All right, Bucky.” He briefly glanced down and grinned before looking back into Melody’s eyes. Before he knew it, the song was over, and Bucky reluctantly removed his hand from her waist.

“Guess I’d better go. Promised the next dance to one of the other girls you were with.”

“Oh, all right. As long as you find me for one more dance before the night ends?”

“I can do that, Doll.” Melody giggled as Bucky led her back to their booth where the brunette was already waiting for him. He grinned at Steve, who was in the middle of a story, and Steve smirked back at him as he watched Bucky lead the woman to the dance floor.

_“Look at that confidence. I knew bringing him here would lift his spirits.”_

* * *

 

After Bucky danced with the brunette—who he learned was named Emma—he ended up dancing with several other girls before finally returning to sit with Steve. Bucky greeted the others with a cheery smile as his dance partners moved to sit beside him. When asked to regale them with a story from the war, Bucky hesitated before turning to Steve.

“You tell them about that mission in the forest about twenty miles south of Munich?”

“You always told that one best,” Steve said with a nudge. Bucky grinned before he turned to the group and began to tell the story, so in his element that he did not even stutter or stumble over his words once. By the end of his tale, the entire room had fallen victim to his charms, and he happily obliged to tell another story about his past.

_“This must be what it was like for the fellas who got to go home,”_ Bucky thought as everyone laughed at the way he had ended his story. _“Talking to friends while listening to good music and drinking—I wish these were my only memories…instead of…”_ Unwelcome images suddenly flooded his mind. The harder he tried to stop thinking about them, the more vividly he remembered several of the heinous acts he had been forced to commit as the Winter Soldier. He reached out and grasped Steve’s arm tightly as he struggled to take a deep breath.

“Buck, you all right?” Steve asked in concern. Not wanting to explain the mental images that haunted him, Bucky nodded quickly, though he kept a firm grip on his friend’s arm.

“Can we go home?” He asked softly. Steve looked perplexed but nodded in agreement.

“Sure.” He leaned forward, putting his hands on his knees. “Well, it’s getting pretty late. Looks like we better take off.” Steve said with an apologetic smile.

“Aw, don’t go! Please stay!” The others protested.

“The place closes at midnight, can’t you stay until then?” A lovely redhead asked Steve.

“That’s only a half hour from now. You won’t miss us for that long.” The Captain answered with a smile. “Maybe next time we can stay until midnight, huh, Buck?”

“I’d like that.” He said softly with a short nod of his head.

“But, Bucky,” Melody said as she gently grabbed his Vibranium arm, “You promised me one more dance.”

“Oh, that’s right.” He said as he looked at the woman beside him. All he really wanted to do was run home and go to bed, but he was both a gentleman and a man of his word. “One more dance and then we go?”

“Go ahead, Buck,” Steve said with a smile. Bucky allowed himself to be dragged to the dance floor, happy that the song was a slow dance as he no longer had the energy for anything upbeat. He took Melody in his arms, and leaned close, his cheek pressing against hers as they began to sway back and forth across the floor. Bucky closed his eyes, and as he focused on the music, the distressing memories began to slip away. Once again, he was transported back to a time where the Winter Soldier had never existed, and Bucky Barnes was in control of his life. He took a deep breath, inhaling the scent of his date’s perfume before he slowly opened his eyes.

“Sorry I’m so quiet.”

“I don’t mind.”

“Really?”

“Of course. I feel lucky just to dance with you.” Bucky pulled back just enough to look at the girl.

“I’m afraid I’m not the Sergeant Barnes you read about in history books. I’m…I’m not even the Bucky Barnes who existed in those stories I told tonight.”

“Then who are you?”

“I…don’t really know. Still tryin’ to figure it out.”

“That’s all right.”

“It is?”

“Sure.” She said with a smile. The song ended a moment later, and Bucky released Melody as the two joined the other dancers in applauding for the band.

“Guess this is goodnight then,” Bucky said as he took a step back, wondering where the hell the charming Bucky Barnes had gone. Melody suddenly leaned forward to kiss his cheek, and Bucky’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. The girl pulled back and giggled softly as she used her thumb to smudge away the red mark her lipstick left on Bucky’s cheek. The man smiled somewhat bashfully as he chuckled. “Maybe, I’ll see you again?”

“I’m here most nights with my friends.”

“Then I guess I will. Have a good night, Doll.”

“Goodnight, Bucky.” As Bucky turned to leave, he touched his cheek, still able to feel the soft brush of the girl’s lips against his skin.

* * *

 

Tony had been productive for all of thirty minutes in his lab. He spent the rest of the evening angrily tapping a screwdriver against his workbench as he envisioned Bucky with a harem of beautiful women. When it was just after eleven o’clock, Tony bit his bottom lip.

“Hey Friday, are Bucky and Steve back?”

“Not yet, Sir.”

“Thanks.” The man stared at his phone, an internal struggle going on inside of him for all of about ten seconds before he succumbed to his curiosity and pulled up the coordinates for Bucky’s tracker. He pouted when he saw that Bucky was still at the club before quickly shoving his phone back into his pocket.

“I can’t even think. I’ll just go wait for him upstairs.” Tony made his way to his floor, sighing as he stepped out into the dark, lonely apartment. Friday quickly lit up his floor, and Tony shuffled across the apartment and straight through his room to the bathroom. He stripped and stepped into the shower, taking his time as he washed his body and his hair. By the end of the shower, Tony felt exhausted, and he hurriedly dried himself before slipping on his softest flannel pajama pants. He left his clean shirt on the sink, seeing no point in wearing it when he’d rather not—it’s not like Bucky would care. The man probably wouldn’t even notice. Tony stared in the mirror at his wet hair that had already begun to curl at the ends. After a moment, he shrugged and left the bathroom. Tony was too tired to dry and style his hair. He knew that he would regret it in the morning, but that was Future Tony’s problem.

He dropped onto his bed, rolling to his side and slipping beneath the covers. He grabbed one of Bucky’s pillows and lay his head on it as he hugged it. Tony sighed as he kicked at the covers, scowling before he buried his face into the pillow.

_“He better not stay out all night, or I’m going to be really pissed off…”_ Tony took a deep breath, inadvertently inhaling a trace of Bucky’s cologne before he punched the mattress. _“You don’t have any right to be mad. You’re just his friend. If he wants to stay out all night with Steve—“_

“Tony?” He heard Bucky’s gentle voice ask in a hushed tone. Tony quickly rolled over and looked up at the man who grinned. “You’re still awake!”

“I didn’t hear you come in.”

“I tried to be quiet in case you were already asleep,” Bucky said with a smile. As he sat on the bed, Tony’s eyes immediately went to the smear of lipstick on Bucky’s collar before he noticed the faint red smudge that remained on Bucky’s cheek.

“Have fun tonight?” He asked in an even a tone as possible.

“Tony, it was like stepping back in time. I felt like I was home again. All the fellas were in suits and the girls in dresses and stockings. I knew all the music they played, and everyone was so friendly.” Tony’s heart skipped a beat as he watched Bucky’s eyes twinkle with excitement, though his eyes quickly fell back to the lipstick stains, and he had to swallow his jealousy.

“Yeah, I can see that.”

“Huh?”

“Got some lipstick on your collar and your cheek.” Bucky reached up to his cheek with a bashful smile. Tony wanted to scream.

“Danced with some nice girls. I wish you had been there. Come with us next time. The girls would love you.” Tony shrugged a bit as he watched Bucky take off his blazer. As the jacket brushed passed his face, Tony crinkled his nose. When Bucky leaned over him to set his phone on its charger, Tony’s eyes grew wide and he pushed Bucky off of himself. “Tony!”

“You smell like perfume.”

“So?”

“I hate it. Go shower.”

“It’s just a little perfume. Who hates the smell of flowers?”

“Get off the bed.” Bucky frowned down at Tony, slightly irritated by the man’s behavior.

“It’s not going to stick to the bed, it’s barely even on my clothes.”

“Just get away from me!” Bucky stood up in surprise, staring at Tony as if he had lost his mind.

“I’ll shower, okay? Don’t yell at me.” Tony swallowed the lump in his throat and he blinked back the tears beginning to form in his eyes.

“It’s Arp _ **è**_ ge.”

“So? That’s a popular perfume…”

“It **_was_** a popular perfume.” Tony corrected, Bucky’s annoyance melting away once he realized there were tears in Tony’s eyes. “It was the perfume my mother wore…I haven’t smelled it since…gosh, probably since the last time I hugged her.”

“Tony…” Bucky started to reach out, wanting to hug the man, but he stopped himself and took a step back. “Tony, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know…I…” Guilt took hold of Bucky, and he quickly disappeared into the bathroom without another word. He disrobed as quickly as he could before stepping into the shower. Though he had just washed his hair that afternoon, Bucky re-washed it, scrubbing every inch of himself to make sure that not a trace of perfume remained. Once clean, he stepped out of the shower and hurriedly dried himself off before taking Tony’s cologne and applying some to his skin for good measure. Upon realizing that he had not brought clean clothes into the bathroom, he stepped out of the bathroom in the nude and walked to Tony’s closet. He glanced at the man, whose back was facing him, and wondered if Tony was still awake. Bucky quickly grabbed a pair of Tony’s boxers and slipped them on, along with a soft cotton t-shirt that hugged his large physique. Forgoing the search for pants that would fit over his thighs, Bucky slipped into bed.

“Tony?” There was no answer, but Bucky noticed Tony flinch. The super soldier began to panic internally, wondering if Tony would be able to forgive him. “I’m really sorry, Doll…should I…do you want me to leave?”

“No!” Tony rolled over to face him, and Bucky saw the tears streaming down his face.

“Oh, Tony…” He reached out, wrapping his arms around Tony and pulling him into a warm embrace. Tony didn’t fight it, pressing his face into Bucky’s chest. “I didn’t mean to remind you of your mother, Sweetheart. Isn’t there anything I can do to make it hurt less?”

_“Sweetheart? That’s new. Damn you and your 1940s charm.”_ Tony thought. His breath caught in his throat as he felt Bucky’s hand rubbing his back. Though something he’d experienced on more than one occasion, this was the first time feeling Bucky’s hand run over the bare skin on his back, and it seemed to send jolts of electricity throughout his entire body. Tony reached out to grip Bucky’s shirt as a myriad of different emotions took over his body; arousal, jealousy, anger, longing, and guilt. Guilt that his tears were only partially caused by the memories of his mother that the perfume had evoked. The scent of that long-forgotten scent had not comforted Tony, but he knew deep down that he was mostly shedding tears because he was broken-hearted. Apparently, Natasha had been right to worry about him.

_“I don’t know what I expected. Did I actually think he might love me back someday? It’s just…it’s not fair. In my whole life, I only ever truly loved Pepper. Now I have someone who I love probably even more than her, and it can’t ever be? I know him more intimately than almost anyone and I still have to steal a kiss while he’s sleeping, but some girl who met him for the first time just kisses his cheek out in the open?”_ The more Tony thought about it, the angrier he became. That is, until Bucky gently squeezed him.

“Tony? You still haven’t answered.”

“Oh…I…” Tony trailed off as he realized that Bucky was wearing his cologne. Bucky smelled like _him_. In some twisted way, Tony felt a small sense of satisfaction. The other woman’s perfume had been scrubbed away and replaced with **_his_** scent. “You’re wearing my cologne…”

“I didn’t think you’d mind. I don’t have mine up here.”

“It smells good on you.”

“Thanks.”

“Will you dry my hair?”

“Huh? Oh…sure I can.” As Bucky slowly pulled away and walked into the bathroom, Tony realized that Bucky was wearing both his shirt **_and_** his boxers. He sat up, banging the back of his head onto the headboard until Bucky returned, holding up Tony’s comb and a jar of forming cream with a small smile. “I’ve seen you do it enough times. This time you won’t have to fix your hair in the morning.”

“Thanks,” Tony said, his heart fluttering inside his chest. When he heard Bucky turn on the hairdryer, he closed his eyes and sighed in contentment as he felt Bucky run the comb through his hair. Tony relished every minute of Bucky styling his hair, and when the man finished nearly ten minutes later, Tony had to refrain from sulking.

“All done. Go ahead and lie down while I put this away.”

“Wait…let me do yours.”

“You want to dry my hair?” Bucky asked incredulously.

“Well, you can’t sleep with it wet. You might get sick.”

“You said that was an Old Wives’ Tale.”

“Yeah, well…better safe than sorry.” Bucky smiled as he handed the dryer to Tony.

“Okay, thank you.”

“It’s not a problem.” Tony gently combed through Bucky’s long locks, taking time to dry them carefully. When his hair was about halfway dry, Bucky tilted his head back to look up at Tony.

“You’re making me sleepy, better hurry.” Tony smiled down at Bucky, nodding his head in acknowledgment, though he was in no rush to finish Bucky’s hair. Once it was finally dry, Tony dropped the hairdryer and comb onto the nightstand as Bucky lay down beside him.

“We can take care of those tomorrow.”

“Thanks for drying my hair, Tony.”

“You already thanked me.”

“I know, but… I don’t deserve a friend like you. You’re too forgiving.”

“That’s not true.”

“It is.” Tony stared down at Bucky for a moment before leaning down and pressing a kiss right over the spot on Bucky’s cheek where he had seen smudged lipstick. Bucky’s eyes widened in surprise before he laughed. “What was that for?”

“You should know better than to say nice things to me when I’m tired. I turn into a sap.” Bucky chuckled again as Tony asked Friday to turn off the lights. Once the room was dark, Tony lay down, immediately snuggling up against Bucky’s chest. “Promise to wake me up if you have a night terror?”

“All right, I promise.”

“Good…I’m glad you had fun tonight. You deserve to have a good time.”

“Do you really think I do, Tony? Even after how insensitive I was tonight?”

“You didn’t know, Bucky…I just…overreacted. You do deserve to have fun.” Bucky smiled and unconsciously hugged Tony closer to himself.

“Thanks, Tony…Wake me up if you have any nightmares, okay?”

“I will.” Within minutes, Bucky was fast asleep, but Tony lay awake in his arms, tears filling his eyes.

_“If I want to keep his friendship, I have to let the dream of **us** go. At least I got to pretend for a little while tonight…” _Once again, tears began to spill down his cheeks as he clung to the man who was the cause of both his pain and comfort. Tony was awake for nearly another hour before finally crying himself to sleep, knowing that in the morning he would have to stop thinking of Bucky as anything more than a friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> While writing this chapter, I cried. My poor, sweet baby Tony.   
> While editing this chapter, I laughed evilly as I thought about how much all of you would hate me after reading this. lmao  
> But don't worry, I'll be willing your love back within the next few chapters. ;)


	41. Chapter 41

Tony slowly opened his eyes, instantly closing them again when he was temporarily blinded by the morning light. Whining softly as a sharp pain throbbed between his eyes, he rolled over to hide his face against Bucky’s chest. It was only when Tony became more alert a few minutes later that he remembered how much he had cried the previous night.

_“No wonder my head hurts so much.”_ He thought as he nuzzled Bucky’s chest. Upon realizing what he was doing, Tony quickly pulled away, his arms moving up to hug himself. _“I need to go…”_ Without skipping a beat, Tony rolled over to get out of bed, but he felt something cool brush against his back before it held him in place.

“Where ya going?” Tony turned around to see Bucky’s metal fingers curled around the waistband of his pajama pants. Bucky, who was clearly still half-asleep, was staring at Tony with eyes only half opened. Tony glanced at the clock before looking back at Bucky.

“It’s seven. I’m getting up.”

“No, come back to bed.”

“Bucky, I’ve got stuff to do.” Bucky tugged at Tony’s pants to bring him slightly closer before wrapping his arm around the man’s waist and pulling him back into bed. “Bucky!” Tony protested as he ended up once again cuddled against the super soldier’s chest.

“No, I’m being selfish.” Tony looked up in surprise at Bucky’s words. The man’s eyes were once again closed, and Tony hesitated for a moment before speaking.

“Did you have a bad dream?”

“Nope.”

“Then why do you need me? You know you can sleep up here as long as you want.” Bucky opened his eyes and looked down at Tony.

“I dunno, I just do.”

“That’s not a good reason. You can be selfish if you give me a good reason. Otherwise, I’m getting up.” Bucky thought for a moment before burying his face in Tony’s hair as he wrapped himself around Tony as if` he were a Koala bear.

“I’m no good at talkin’ anymore. You just make me feel good.” 

“...What do you mean by that?” Bucky was silent for several moments, and Tony bit his bottom lip as Bucky’s fingers brushed over his bare shoulder.

“You can’t tell Steve, okay? It’d kill him…but…last night I had a lot of fun. It was…like stepping back in time. Wish you could have seen me. The old Bucky was there. He was charming and funny…everyone loved him.” He paused for a moment, his expression holding almost as much confusion as Tony’s. “Then I had a flashback…old Bucky was gone, and then it was just me again…whoever that is.”

“What does that have to do with me?”

“Well…when the Soldier’s memories came back, I grabbed Steve. Before, he was always who I went to when I was upset, but…I told Steve to bring me back. I just wanted to come up here with you. Steve’s still my best friend, but he can’t comfort me the way you do.” Tony sighed as he put his hand on Bucky’s side. It might hurt to spend time with the man, but Bucky clearly needed him. In a way, that did make him feel good—at least he was somewhat special to Bucky.

“Bucky, if you didn’t have a bad dream, why do you need comfort?” Tony asked again, his tone far softer than it had been only moments ago. Bucky looked perplexed by the question, thinking carefully for a moment before he answered.

“I-I guess I don’t.” He unwrapped himself from around Tony, and though he was smiling, Tony could see the sadness in the man’s eyes. After mentally berating himself for being inconsiderate, Tony reached up to squeeze Bucky’s arm.

“You know what? I’m sorry. You don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to. I’m staying right here, okay?” Tony said, his heart skipping a beat as he watched Bucky instantly perked up.

“Tony, I really don’t know…I promise I’d tell you.”

“It’s okay, Bucky. You don’t have to tell me everything.”

“But I like to tell you everything.” The statement made Tony smile, and he tried to swallow his feelings for the other man as he reached up to brush Bucky’s hair out of his face.

“Oh yeah? Then why don’t you go ahead and tell me all about last night, huh? I didn’t get to hear about it before we went to bed.” A smile lit up Bucky’s face as he began to chatter excitedly to Tony about every little detail of the previous evening. Tony continued to stroke Bucky’s hair as he listened, trying with every fiber of his being to not be jealous when Bucky started talking about the beautiful girls with whom he had danced the night away. 

* * *

 

“Hello, Mr. Stark. To what do I owe the pleasure?” Tony’s lawyer greeted as he answered the phone.

“Just calling to check up on Sergeant Barnes’ back pay. It’s been a while. Where is it?”

“Well, the government has agreed to pay the back pay as a lump sum. Unfortunately, they say that it will take about three months to process.”

“Three months? That’s unacceptable.”

“Mr. Stark, I’m afraid there’s nothing else we can do. I’m pretty sure the only reason they even agreed to give Sergeant Barnes the lump sum so quickly is because I told them you were the one pushing for it. We’ll just have to wait.” Tony pinched the bridge of his nose before leaning his head on the steering wheel of his car. He closed his eyes for a moment before suddenly sitting upright.

“All right,” Tony said as he pulled the phone away from his ear and opened one of his banking apps. “I’m transferring you twenty grand. You give half of it to Sergeant Barnes today. Don’t tell him it’s from me. Say it’s an advance from the government or something. The other half is for you. Got it?”

“Yes, Sir. That’s very generous. Thank you…will you be informing Sergeant Barnes to see me?”

“Oh, he got a phone. I’ll forward you his number. Don’t forget, I want him to get that money today.”

“I’ll call him as soon as I get the number.”

“All right. Thanks, Jeff.” Tony ended the call before returning his phone to his pocket. He ran a hand over his face before sliding out of his car and walking into Stark Industries.

“Good Morning, Mr. Stark. Should I tell Miss Potts that you’re here?” The receptionist on the first floor of the building greeted cheerily.

“Nope, surprising her.” He said as he playfully held a finger to his lips to signal for the woman to not alert Pepper that he was in the building.

“Yes, Sir.” She said with a soft laugh. Tony grinned and winked at her before he walked into the elevator. He went straight to the top floor, heading straight past Pepper’s secretary as he opened the door to her office.

“Good morning, Sunshine!”

“Tony?” Pepper looked up from her work in surprise before eyeing him suspiciously. “What are you doing here?”

“I thought I’d drop by to see if my lovely CEO needed any help with anything.”

“Peter’s not back in school yet, is he?”

“Not until next week, but he’s with May until this evening,” Tony said as he sat on the edge of Pepper’s desk.

“And you’re willingly coming here to do work until then?”

“Why do you sound so suspicious?”

“Gee, I don’t know, Tony. Maybe because I normally have to twist your arm to get you to do anything for your company.”

“Pepper, that accusation hurts me,” Tony said as he scooted closer to her. She raised an eyebrow and folded her arms over her chest, causing Tony to laugh. “Ouch, Pep. You really know how to hurt a guy. I just want to help.” At that point, Tony was basically sitting on her keyboard, and Pepper shook her head.

“How am I supposed to do my work when you’re sitting in front of my computer?”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” Tony said as he slid off the desk and straddled her lap. “Is that better?” Tony grinned as Pepper struggled to look unamused.

“I still can’t see my computer.”

“You want to sit on my lap instead?”

“Tony, what’s going on?”

“What do you mean?”

“Don’t play coy with me. How long have I known you? You know that I can see right through your shenanigans.” Tony pouted and leaned forward to steal a quick kiss from Pepper’s lips.

“I haven’t seen you much. I miss you.”

“Tony, we’re not going there…” Pepper said in a warning tone.

“I know, I know. We don’t work as a couple. Doesn’t mean I can’t steal a kiss now and then, does it?”

“It depends on why you want one. What’s bothering you?”

_“Damn, she’s good. How can she always see right through me?”_ Tony thought as he looked down at her. “Nothing.”

“It’s nine o’clock in the morning and you’re dressed, in my office, and sitting on my lap.”

“What’s wrong with that?”

“Tony, I have to run **_your_** company. If you’re not going to tell me what’s bothering you, then get out.”

“Aw, Pep—“

“Are you going to tell me?”

“Nothing’s bothering me.”

“Then out.” Tony slid off her lap with a sigh as Pepper pointed to a stack of papers on her desk. “I was going to send those over for you to fill out and sign, but since you’re here you can take them. Send them back by tomorrow afternoon, hm?” She said sweetly. Tony grumbled under his breath as he picked up the papers before he leaned to kiss his CEO’s forehead.

“Okay, I’m going. Bye, Pep.” Tony said before he dejectedly walked out of the office, leaving a worried Pepper staring after him.

* * *

 

Bucky closed his eyes as he rolled a pair of dice onto the Monopoly board. He slowly opened one eye to peek at the dice—a five and a three.

“Nooooooo!” He cried out dramatically as Sam cackled from the other side of the board. “I can’t afford to land on Boardwalk!”

“You can if you mortgage a few of your properties.” Sam pointed out.

“How about an I.O.U?”

“That only works with Steve. All of my hotels require cash up front.” Sam grinned gleefully as Bucky scraped together the remainder of his play money before flipping over a property to mortgage it. Bucky tossed the bills at him before looking at Steve.

“All right, Banker. Give him the money for my mortgaged property.” Steve chuckled as he took the money from the bank and handed it to Sam.

“You’re really cleaning up this game.”

“Yeah, because that was the second time I landed on Boardwalk.” Bucky pointed out.

“Hey, it’s a great establishment. You act like it’s not worth the money.”

“I’m not really staying there!”

“Cut it out, guys. It’s my turn. Toss me the dice, Buck.” Bucky glared at Sam before picking up the dice and handing them to Steve. As Bucky watched the other man take his turn, loud music suddenly started to play nearby. Startled, his head snapped in the direction of the sound.

“Don’t even know your own ringtone, huh?” Sam asked as he pointed to Bucky’s phone. Bucky grabbed the device and stared at it for a moment before tapping the green phone button. His brow furrowed in confusion when the phone continued to ring. “Don’t tap it. Drag it.” Bucky glanced up at Sam before looking back at his phone and following the man’s directions. When the music ceased, Bucky held the phone to his ear.

“Hello?”

“Hello, is this Sergeant Barnes?”

“That’s right. Who’s this?”

“This is Jeffrey Holmes—Mr. Stark’s lawyer.”

“Oh, hello.”

“I have some good news for you and some bad news. Which would you like first?”

“Uh…the bad news, I guess.”

“Well, you will be getting your full back pay in one lump-sum. Unfortunately, it will take several more months for it to come through.”

“Oh, I see,” Bucky said as his face fell. Steve cast him a worried glance as he held the phone closer to his ear. “What’s the good news then?”

“The good news is that the government is giving you a ten thousand dollar advance to hold you over until they are able to process the full amount owed.”

“Really?” Bucky asked, his eyes widening in surprise.

“Really. This bank account information I have for you is correct?”

“Yes, Sir. I just opened that one when I found my social security number.”

“Good. I’ll transfer the money right away. You should have it within the hour.”

“Wow, thank you, Mr. Holmes!”

“It’s my pleasure.” The lawyer hung up and Bucky looked up at Steve and Sam with a large grin plastered onto his face.

“What was that about?” Sam asked curiously.

“My back pay…gonna take a few months before they can give it to me, but they’re giving me ten thousand dollars of it now.”

“That’s wonderful, Buck!” Steve said with a huge smile.

“I can finally get some new clothes…I won’t have to borrow your suit next time we go dancing! And I can pay Tony back for the phone—” Bucky suddenly hopped to his feet, and Sam motioned for him to sit down.

“Hey, hey, hey. You might be rolling in dough in real life, but I’m not done taking all your money in this game.” Bucky grinned, no longer caring at all about Sam’s taunts.

“I’ll be right back. I just want to tell Tony,” Bucky said, not noticing the way Steve's smile wavered, “I’ll probably be back before it’s even my turn.” And with that, he scurried into the elevator, laughing excitedly as the doors closed behind him.

 

* * *

 

“What are you working on today?” Tony turned around in surprise, his face lighting up as he saw that his best friend had just entered his lab.

“Honey Bear!”

“How’re you doing, Tones?” Rhodey asked with a smile as he hugged the man who had just flung himself into his arms.

“Wonderful.”

“Funny, that’s not what Pepper said.” Tony pulled away and looked at his friend with a raised brow.

“You talked to Pepper today?”

“She called me and told me to find some time to come talk to you. Said something’s wrong, but you wouldn’t talk to her.” Tony rolled his eyes and returned to sit on his stool.

“Oh, you know how Pepper is,” Tony said with a dismissive wave of his hand.

“If you mean incredibly astute, then yes, I know how she is.”

“You’re ganging up on me.” Rhodey laughed as he pulled up another stool to sit beside Tony.

“And as usual, you’re being a drama queen.”

“Hey!”

“Talk to me, Tony. How many times have I told you that I’m always here for you?” Tony looked down at his tools silently for a minute before he started to fiddle with them once again.

“I’m in love.”

“I thought you were over Pepper.”

“I am.” Rhodey’s eyebrows shot up.

“You’ve never loved anyone aside from Pepper.”

“I know.”

“Do I know her?”

“You’ve met…and it’s not a ‘her’.”

“Please tell me it’s not Captain America.” Tony laughed and shook his head.

“Why would you think it’s Steve?”

“Oh, I don’t know. Maybe it was the giant Captain America poster you kept on your half of our dorm room.”

“You said you’d never speak of that again,” Tony said as he narrowed his eyes.

“No, **_you_** said I should never speak of it again,” Rhodey said with a teasing grin before his face fell. “But you didn’t deny it. Oh man, Tony…of all the people to fall in love with—“

“It’s not Steve.”

“…Is it Thor? I can see that. Big, handsome, sweet as can be. Very much your type.” Tony laughed and threw a pair of goggles at his friend.

“It’s not Thor, stop guessing!” Tony said before his expression turned somber. “Doesn’t matter who it is anyway. He’s straighter than Steve is.”

“Is that even possible?”

“Hey, I’ve caught Cap staring at my ass on more than one occasion.” Tony bragged, and Rhodey gave him a skeptical look.

“You sure that’s not wishful thinking on your part?”

“I resent that.” Rhodey laughed before reaching out to squeeze Tony’s arm.

“In all seriousness, why can’t you just avoid the guy? At least until some of the feelings start to dissipate.”

“It’s not that easy.”

“Why not? Even if he lives in the tower, it should be easy enough to avoid him.” Tony opened his mouth before deciding not to speak after all. With a quick nod of his head, he looked over at Rhodey.

“You’re right.”

“Good…I don’t know why you’re being so secretive, but if you ever decide to tell me more information so that I can actually be of use to you, you know to call me, right?”

“Why do you ask me that as if I haven’t been your best friend for thirty years?”

“Because even after thirty years, you’d still rather cry yourself to sleep than ask someone for help.” Tony rolled his eyes, but both he and Rhodey knew that it was the truth.

“All right, all right. Enough about me—why do I hardly ever see you anymore?”

“You know that I’ve had a lot of assignments lately. I can’t give you many details, but since you know about Hydra, I can tell you that I’ve been heading up the creation of a special team to—“

“Tony!” Tony spun around on his stool, surprised at the sound of Bucky’s voice.

“Bucky, what are you doing down here?”

“I got a call from your lawyer about my back pay!” Bucky excitedly explained. “I can’t get the whole thing for a few more months, but they gave me a ten thousand dollar advance until then!”

“Really? That’s great, Bucky!”

“Yeah, I—“ Rhodey cleared his throat and leaned over to put himself in Bucky’s line of vision. The super soldier glanced at him briefly before his eyes widened and he returned his attention to the man. “Colonel.” He said as he stood at attention and nervously saluted the man. Tony looked at him and giggled softly, causing Rhodey to raise an eyebrow.

“At ease, Sergeant.”

“I-I’m sorry, Tony. Thought you were alone. Didn’t mean to bother ya.” Bucky mumbled as he took a few steps backward.

“It’s all right, but you shouldn’t be down here anyway.” Bucky looked up at Tony and smiled as he caught the worried look on his friend’s face.

“I’ll be okay. But don’t wanna bother you. See you later. Goodbye, Colonel.” Bucky said with a polite nod of his head before he turned around and quickly exited the lab. The moment Friday had finished closing the doors behind Bucky, Rhodey turned to Tony with an incredulous expression on his face.

“Really?”

“What?”

“You’re in love with Barnes?”

“I-I didn’t say that.” Tony sputtered.

“Well, you just confirmed it with that reaction,” Rhodey said as he shook his head. “Listen, I knew you guys were friends and all now…but don’t forget that he’s still the Winter Soldier.”

“No, he isn’t.”

“Tony…”

“That wasn’t him, Rhodey. He was just as much a victim of the Winter Soldier as my parents were.”

“I don’t want you to get hurt.”

“He would never hurt me.”

“He already has.” Tony looked away, eyes welling up with tears as his friend’s words caused a pang in his heart.

“That’s not his fault…” Tony blinked rapidly before glancing up at Rhodey. “How did you know it was him anyway?”

“You mean besides you giggling like a schoolgirl when he saluted me?” Tony huffed, and Rhodey chuckled. “Because he just walked in here like he owned the place. The only other people allowed to enter without Friday asking your permission are Me, Pepper, Happy, and the kid. Not even the other Avengers have unlimited access.” Rhodey searched Tony’s face for a moment before releasing a deep sigh. “A ten thousand dollar advance from the government?”

“Huh?”

“That’s what Barnes said. Your lawyer got him a ten thousand dollar advance on his back pay. From the government.”

“Yeah, I’m happy for him.”

“Come on, Tony. We both know the government isn’t giving him any advances.”

“You know, you’re really annoying sometimes.”

“You have it bad for him, huh?” Rhodey asked with a laugh. Tony responded with a sheepish nod, and Rhodey moved his hand to Tony's shoulder. “All right, so you avoid him for a while. Occupy your mind with other things—maybe go out on a date with someone else, invent something new, flirt with Thor,” Tony snorted at the last suggestion, but shook his head.

“It’s not that easy…”

“I’m not saying that it’s easy to get over someone you’re in love with, but—“

“No, I mean it’s not that easy to avoid him.”

“Why not?” Tony stared at Rhodey for a moment before shrugging his shoulders.

“We’re kind of attached to each other.” 

“Well, I know why you’re attached to him, but why is he attached to you?’

“Uh…I’m sort of like a human security blanket, I guess.”

“What does that even mean?” Tony mumbled as he looked away, and the Colonel narrowed his eyes. “A little louder?”

“I said…that we, you know, kind of…sleep together.” Rhodey’s eyebrows shot up in surprise.

“And you still think he’s straight?”

“Not like that!” Tony said as he smacked his friend’s arm. “It’s really just sleeping.”

“How often does that happen?”

“Well, he keeps a toothbrush in my bathroom.” Rhodey slowly rubbed a hand over his face before crossing his arms over his chest.

“You mean to tell me that every night, you lay next to the man that you’re in love with—and knowing you, you snuggle with him too—and yet he is completely straight and has no idea about your feelings for him?” Tony nodded, dropping his eyes to avoid his best friend’s judgmental gaze.

“Listen, I trust you. If you say he’s not the Winter Soldier, I believe it…but putting yourself so close to someone you have unrequited feelings for…it’s not good for you, Tones.”

“I know.”

“Why don’t you sleep somewhere else tonight? There’s plenty of other rooms here. Or check into a hotel. Stay with me. Hell, Pepper would let you stay with her if you told her why.”

_“He’s right…I can’t keep sleeping with Bucky. And Pepper would definitely let me stay with her if I told her about Bucky. I know that if I promised to behave, she’d let me sleep with her too…I could snuggle up behind her and smell her strawberry shampoo—“_

“Tony?” Rhodey’s voice shook him from his thoughts, and he looked at his friend.

“Sorry…maybe I’ll ask—“ Before Tony finished his sentence, the image of a teary Bucky appeared in his mind. He knew firsthand just how awful nightmares were—after all, he’d had them his entire life. Sure, he could go a few nights without Bucky if he had to. He’d probably go back to being an easily irritable, sleep-deprived hot mess, but he’d lived most of his life that way. Bucky, on the other hand, had not. He also had vivid hallucinations, and Tony felt a pang of worry as he thought about Bucky trying to deal with one of them alone. “I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“He needs me Rhodey.”

“That’s just an excuse—“

“No, he does…Bucky has bad dreams too…that’s actually why we ended up sleeping together in the first place. His nightmares are even worse than mine... He needs comfort, and for whatever reason, he finds that in me. I’m not taking that away from him just to heal my broken heart.”

“Always the hero, aren’t you?” Rhodey asked with a sigh as he stood up. He took a step forward to stand directly in front of Tony.

“As if.”

“Normally when your stubborn ass makes a stupid decision, I tell you not to come crying to me…I won’t say that this time. But be careful? I hate seeing you get hurt.” Rhodey reached out to hug Tony, who quickly returned the embrace.

“I’ll try.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was so long that I had to divide it into two chapters ><
> 
> I am staying at my brother's house for a few days to watch his dogs while he's on vacation, and I can't even focus on my writing right now because one of his dogs is the most hyperactive dog in the world and he's driving me insane. So here's to hoping that my furry little nephew will stop bothering me every two seconds while I'm trying to write. >< If Otto is a good boy and calms down, expect a new chapter very soon.


	42. Chapter 42

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, Otto [my brother's 2-year-old German Shepherd] would not leave me alone, and then his eight-month-old German Shepherd/Huskie mix brother was teething, so needless to say, I got NO writing done while I was dogsitting. I also hardly slept because they would keep me up until 4 and wake me up at 6 :] I got home yesterday, but have basically just been sleeping ahaha. 
> 
> This is a shorter chapter as it's the continuation from last chapter. The next chapter will be up tomorrow or the day after ♥

“Hey, Pops.”

Tony felt a pair of arms slide around his neck and he grinned as he turned toward the cheerful voice.

“Hey, Kiddo. When’d you get back?”

“Just now. Have you eaten yet? I’m hungry.”

“Not yet. What are you in the mood for?” Peter hopped over the back of the couch to sit beside Tony.

“Fried chicken?”

“Excellent choice. Friday, do you think that can be arranged?”

“I’ll order it now, Sir.”

“Thanks, Darling.” Tony slung his arm around Peter and smiled fondly at him. “All right, Petey. Tell me what you got up to with May and Ned last night.”

“We did what we always do at the end of every summer: we made a giant fort out of blankets and watched movies inside it while we ate microwave s’mores!” Peter said with a grin before poking Tony’s side. “You should have come.”

“I didn’t want to intrude on your little tradition,” Tony said as he fluffed Peter’s curls with his fingertips.

“I told you this year **_and_** last year that it wouldn’t be intruding,” Peter said as he lay his head on Tony’s shoulder. “If I didn’t know better, I’d guess that you didn’t want to come.”

“Hey, that’s not true!”

“I said if I **_didn’t_** know better…but I do. And I think you’re afraid that I’m the only one who would want you there. But that’s not true. May and Ned love you too, y’know. ” Tony looked down in surprise before dropping his head to lean against Peter’s.

“Can everyone read me like you can, and I’m just blissfully unaware? Be honest.”

“Nope. I just know you better than most.”

“Well, that’s a relief,” Tony said, and Peter closed his eyes as he pressed himself into Tony’s side.

“Tony, I know I always tease you about Bucky, but I am glad you have him. If you didn’t, I’d really worry about you when I go back to school.”

“Worry about me? My job is to worry about you... and is that your way of apologizing for always trying to set us up?”

“Oh, no. I still plan on continuing that mission.” Peter said as he pulled away just enough to look up at Tony with an impish grin.

“Geez, Kid. You need to give it a rest. Even if the stars somehow aligned perfectly for us, you’re forgetting two things.”

“Oh, yeah? What?”

“Bucky’s straight, and we’re just friends.”

“I don’t know.” Tony raised an eyebrow, though he quickly changed his appearance to one of indifference before Peter could notice.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Well, he never said he was straight.”

“Oh, c’mon, Peter. That doesn’t—“

“You should have seen him blush when he found out that tracking device you gave him was one of your expensive watches.” Tony’s eyes grew large, and Peter smirked. “What? You thought I wouldn’t notice Bucky wearing one of your watches?”

“Well, uh—“

“And when he saw the tracking devices you gave everyone else, he felt so special. I don’t think anyone’s made him feel that way in a long time.”  Tony gnawed at his bottom lip before shaking his head.

“I do that kind of stuff for all my friends. And he **_is_** special, Peter. He deserves to feel that way. It doesn’t mean I’m in love with the guy.”

“Fine, so you’re not in love with Bucky. Just answer one question for me. If you say ‘no’, then I’ll never bother you about him again.”

“All right, shoot.”

“If Bucky **_did_** find himself attracted to you, would you be interested in going on a date with him?” Tony hesitated, knowing damn well that he would gladly fling himself into Bucky’s arms at any given moment. The corner of Peter’s lips curled into a smug smile.

“Well—“

“Nope, you hesitated. That means yes.”

“Peter! That doesn’t mean—“ The teen tilted his head up to kiss Tony on the cheek. Tony stopped protesting, blinking as a perplexed expression appeared on his features. “What’s that for?”

“I was distracting you so you’d shut up and stop fighting the obvious.” When Tony’s mouth opened into a surprised “o” shape, Peter tossed his head back and howled with laughter. Finding it quite impossible to be upset with Peter, Tony opted instead for grabbing a nearby throw pillow and smacking the teenager with it.

“That’s for teasing me!”

“That’s not fair!” Peter hopped up and grabbed the decorative pillow off a nearby chair, quickly smacking Tony before jumping behind the couch. Tony darted after Peter, who leapt over a table and then ran up the wall to the ceiling.

“All right, Peter Pan. Come down here and fight me like a man!”

“Oh ho! That must make you Captain Hook!” Tony blinked before shrugging his shoulders.

“I ain’t Tinkerbell, Kid.” Peter snickered and jumped out of the way as Tony lobbed a pillow toward him.

“Missed me!” Peter shouted, and Tony grabbed the rest of the pillows from around the living room, tossing them at Peter as the boy darted around the light fixtures on the ceiling. “Face it, you’ll never get me, you Codfish!”

“You wouldn’t stand a chance against me if you had the courage to come down here and fight me mano a mano.”

“Oh yeah?” Peter asked as he puffed up his chest and jogged halfway down the wall. “We’ll see about that.”

“All the way on the ground,” Tony said, playfully narrowing his eyes at Peter. At that moment, the elevator doors opened, and Tony and Peter both turned to watch Bucky enter the apartment. Bucky’s face lit up when he saw the pair, though his eyebrows quickly knit together as he noticed Peter standing on the wall and glaring at Tony, whose feet were surrounded by a plethora of pillows.

“Aha, one of my lost boys has come to join the fight!”

“Lost boy?” Bucky asked as Tony charged toward him and wrapped his arm loosely around Bucky’s neck.

“I’ve got him now, Pan. You win the fight, and you can have him back relatively unharmed.” Tony said before looking at Bucky with a grin. “He’s Peter Pan. I’m Hook.”

“I know that story!” Bucky said, excited that he finally understood a reference. “I’m a lost boy?” Tony nodded to Bucky as Peter walked back onto the floor.

“All right, Hook. Release my man and square up. A true gentleman’s fight.” Tony released Bucky, who grinned as he moved to sit on a nearby chair. Peter ran to the coat closet near the front door and grabbed two umbrellas, tossing one to Tony as he walked back. Tony laughed and caught it before putting on a grim expression.

“If you win, you get your friend, but what if I win?”

“If you win, you’ll get the honor of being the only person who has ever defeated me.”

“I can live with that,” Tony said before he and Peter charged toward one another, makeshift swords drawn. The two began dueling one another as Bucky watched. Tony backed Peter into a corner, but Peter dodged the umbrella before managing to back Tony up against a window. Tony ducked low and then ran to stand on a couch. Peter followed closely behind, closing in on Tony until the man was standing on the arm of the sofa. Tony kicked Peter backward onto the sofa and pointed his umbrella at Peter’s neck as he grinned evilly. “Any last words, Pan?”

Before Peter had a chance to respond, the “tick-tock” of a clock was heard. Peter and Tony both looked at one another in confusion before they turned to look at Bucky, who was holding up his phone with a devilish grin.

“Uh oh, Captain. Think that’s the sound of a hungry crocodile.” Both Peter and Tony burst into laughter, though Tony masked his by grabbing a throw blanket and pulling it over his head. He dramatically fell to the floor and writhed around for a moment, as if he were being attacked, before he lay motionless under the blanket.

“Sir, I’m sorry to spoil your fun, but your dinner has arrived and is being sent up now.” Tony pulled the blanket off his head as Peter ran to the elevator.

“CHICKEN!”

“Yeah, I’m totally fine down here. I don’t need any help getting up or anything.” Tony sarcastically said as he pulled himself into a sitting position. Bucky hopped up and walked over, grabbing one of Tony’s arms and helping him up to his feet.

“Thanks, Bucky,” Tony said with a chuckle as he straightened his crumpled shirt.

“No problem, Doll. You deserve an award for that performance.” Peter returned with an armful of food just in time to hear Bucky’s comment, his eyes growing comically large as he heard the super soldier fondly refer to Tony as “Doll”.

“It was excellent, wasn’t it?” Tony agreed smugly. “But I must also compliment your comedic timing with that clock bit. How did you know where to find a that sound so quickly?”

“Peter said I can find just about anything on YouTube.”

“Well, the kid’s not wrong there,” Tony said with a laugh. “But hey, it’s still early. What are you doing up here already?”

“I’ve been with the others all day. Thought I’d see if Peter was back or if you were up here yet.”

“Well, you’re in luck because we’re both here. Interested in some fried chicken for dinner?”

“Fried chicken? Really?” Bucky asked excitedly; Tony smiled as he watched the man’s eyes dance.

“Should be some potatoes and biscuits too.”

“Wow!” Bucky’s excitement caused Tony to grin as he noticed Peter standing behind the couch and staring at them.

“Kid, what’re you just standing there for?”

“Nothing!” Peter said as he quickly plopped onto the couch and set the food on the table. “Let’s eat, I’m starving!”

Tony sat beside Peter, and Bucky sat on his other side, the three of them talking casually as they ate their dinner.

“Oh, Peter! You weren’t here earlier so I forgot to tell you, but guess what?”

“What, Bucky?”

“I got money! Well, not all of it yet. But I got $10,000 of it, and that’s plenty enough!”

“Really? That’s awesome! You’re gonna get some clothes right? Can I go with you and help you pick some out?”

“You would do that for me?” Bucky asked in astonishment.

“Of course, I will. It’ll be fun! Tony’ll come too, right?”

“Sure thing. Tomorrow?”

“No, we’re busy tomorrow. Let’s go the day after.” Peter said, and Tony frowned in thought.

“We’re busy? This is why I always have Pepper help me with my schedule.” Tony muttered under his breath. “What were our plans again?”

“Oh, don’t feel bad. I never told you about them.” Peter said, laughing smugly between bites of chicken. “But we’re all going to the beach tomorrow. I mean, we should.”

“By ‘we’ I’m assuming you mean all the Avengers? Have you discussed this with anyone else yet?”

“Well, no. I just thought about it today...But it’s my last few days of freedom, so I’m sure most of them will come!”

“What are you going to do when you outgrow using your cute face to get your way?” Tony asked as he nudged Peter with his elbow.

“I figure I still have a few good decades left in me. After all, you’re still doing it.” Peter said, causing Bucky to snort.

“I resent that.” Tony said to Peter before glancing at Bucky, “And I resent you for laughing.”

“No, you don’t. You’re very proud of how cute you are.” Peter challenged. Tony stared at him for a second before shrugging his shoulders and leaning back into the couch.

“All right, well, I’ll give you that,” Tony said, causing Bucky and Peter to laugh. In his amusement, Bucky slapped Tony’s knee, and it didn’t go unnoticed by Peter that his hand lingered. “Hey, wait a minute,” Tony said as he turned to look at Bucky.

“Hm?”

“If you guys go shopping the day after tomorrow, I can’t come. Pepper’s got me for a meeting and then to go over some paperwork.” Tony said, unconsciously pouting ever so slightly.

The way that the two men affectionately looked at one another made Peter want to scream. He briefly considered shoving their faces together and telling them to kiss, but as the odds of that working were entirely too slim, Peter decided to stick with his original plan to slowly make Tony and Bucky realize that they were perfect for one another.

“That’s okay! I mean, I wish you could come, but you don’t have to miss out on the fun. Bucky can show you all his clothes when he gets back. Maybe even try some on to show you.” Peter said as he envisioned the hallway being turned into a runway for Bucky to strut.

“You’re not imagining something weird, are you?” Tony asked as he suspiciously eyed Peter.

“Me? Of course not.”

“Mhm.” Tony said, clearly skeptical, “You better not be.” Peter simply grinned in response as he set his empty plate on the coffee table before snuggling up against Tony’s side. Tony leaned forward to place his own plate on the table before sitting back against the couch and putting his arm around the teenager. “Tired?” He asked as grabbed a blanket off the back of the couch and spread it over Peter.

“Yeah,” Peter said with a nod, “Not sleepy tired, just exhausted tired. You guys want to watch a movie?”

“Sure, Kid. What are you in the mood for?” Peter thought for a moment before shifting to look over Tony at Bucky.

“You pick, Bucky.”

“I wouldn’t know where to start. I’ll watch anything.”

“Okay, I’ll just put on some funny movie then…but first come closer, you look so lonely all the way at the other end of the couch.” Peter said as Tony handed him the remote. Tony chuckled and rolled his eyes as Bucky was only a foot away from them, but Bucky didn’t hesitate in following orders and moving closer to them. As the movie began to play, Tony unconsciously leaned into Bucky, and the man slipped his arm loosely around Tony’s waist as he always did when they slept. Peter grinned to himself as he started to plot more ways to play cupid, though he fell asleep on Tony’s chest fifteen minutes into the movie.

* * *

 

Peter whined in confusion as he felt himself being pulled away from Tony's warmth. Opening his eyes, he found himself in the darkened living room as he was pulled into someone else's arms. 

“Just me, Peter. Movie ended. Takin’ ya to bed.” Bucky mumbled, obviously just as tired. Without hesitation, Peter wrapped his arms around Bucky’s neck and lay his head on the man’s shoulder as Bucky balanced him on his hip.

“Tony sleeping too?”

“Sure is,” Bucky whispered as he knelt down and wrapped his Vibranium arm around the other man’s waist, picking him up to balance him on his other hip. Without another word, the super soldier carried the two heroes down the hallway and into Peter’s room. Bucky gently lay Peter down before hoisting Tony a bit higher and moving his free hand to the man's back.

“Bucky?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for carrying me.”

“Anytime, Kid,” Bucky said as he watched Peter crawl under his covers. He turned to leave, only making it a few steps before Tony began to stir in his arms. The genius mumbled something unintelligible, and Peter watched as Bucky slid his hand up Tony’s neck before gently pushing the man’s head back to his shoulder. “Go back to sleep, Doll. Just carryin’ ya to bed.” As the genius' head dropped back to his shoulder, Bucky leaned his head against Tony’s before leaving the room, completely unaware that Peter watched the entire exchange with a sleepy grin plastered to his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter makes me uwu. 
> 
> Also, reader TheCrazyHedgehogLady created a playlist on Spotify for this fic. I have been listening to it while writing and editing, and I think she did a great job on it. If you like background music while you read, you guys should give it a listen. ♥ https://open.spotify.com/playlist/31uO3B5AFuniCU0ErJjihH?si=-xNXJ6MmQrumtJ5NSacUBQ


	43. Chapter 43

“Everyone have everything?” Steve asked as he glanced around the garage. After receiving confirmation from the group that they were ready, the Captain nodded. “All right, then. Let’s head out.”

“Beach day, take two!” Tony said before taking a sip of coffee.  As everyone began to head toward a car, Peter reached out to grab Bucky’s arm.

“Hey, ride with me.”

“Okay,” Bucky said, a smile lighting up his face as he allowed himself to be dragged away by the teenager. “Hey, Steve, I’m riding in Tony’s car!” The Captain turned in surprise but plastered a fake smile onto his face as he watched his friend being dragged toward the other vehicle.

“All right, Buck. See you there.” Sam eyed Steve but said nothing before he moved to get into the front seat of Steve’s car. As Bucky turned his attention back to Peter, the teenager pulled him a bit closer and whispered in his ear.

“Say ‘shotgun’ really loud.” Bucky looked at Peter as if the teenager had lost his mind.

“I really don’t think I should say that.” Immediately noting the man’s uneasiness, Peter quickly shook his head.

“It’s okay, no one will misunderstand. If you’re the first person to yell ‘shotgun’ as you run to the car, you get the honor of riding in the front seat.”

“But you should yell it then. Why are you telling me to do it?”

“Because…well, I always ride in the front seat.” Peter said, not having expected Bucky to question his motives. “Just do it before someone steals your seat!” Bucky chuckled at the boy’s insistence before shrugging his shoulders.

“Shotgun!” Shouting the word made Bucky uneasy, but he immediately relaxed when he received only looks of amusement from the others.

“I didn’t know they used that slang back in your day,” Tony said with a chuckle.

“Don’t think they did. At least I never heard it. Peter just told me to say it.” Tony leaned behind Bucky’s back to narrow his eyes at Peter, wanting the boy to know that he was aware of his scheming. Peter simply smirked back at Tony, causing the man to sigh and shake his head in exasperation as he slid into the front seat of his car. Bucky jogged around to get into the passenger seat as Peter, Thor, and Loki climbed into the back.

“All right, Bucky. What’re we listening to on the way there?” Tony asked as he started the car.

“Why do I have to pick?”

“Well, you don’t have to. But you’re in the passenger seat, so you get to control the music—although, as the driver, I reserve the right to override any of your song choices.”

“Why don’t you just choose in the first place then?” Bucky asked with a laugh.

“All right, well…it’s not my usual pick, but since we’re going to the beach it seems fitting that we listen to The Beach Boys. Any objections?”

“None from the backseat!” Peter said and Loki poked his side.

“Peter, it is rude to speak for others.”

“Sorry.”

“Not a fan of the Beach Boys, Loki?” Tony asked as he glanced in the rearview mirror.

“I have never heard of them before, but I have no objection to your choice, Anthony.” Tony chuckled as he turned on the music and slid on a pair of sunglasses.

“Then let’s have fun, fun, fun as we head off to the beach for the day.” Tony sang to the tune of one of the Beach Boy’s hits, laughing gleefully as Peter booed him from the back seat.

 

* * *

 

The Avengers managed to find a fairly secluded spot on the beach, quickly dropping their things onto the sand as they spread out their towels.

“Underoos!” Tony shouted as he watched Peter drop his backpack and charge toward the water.

“What?”

“Come here.”

“What’s wrong?” Peter asked as he jogged back over to Tony.

“Did you put on sunscreen?”

“Well, no. But—“

“No buts. I’d rather you not turn into a lobster today.” Tony said as he grabbed a can of spray-on sunscreen and shook it. “Close your eyes,” Peter grumbled but did as he was told.

“Hey, that’s cold,” Peter said as he felt the sunblock being sprayed onto his skin.

“Better than getting a burn later. Turn around.” Tony sprayed the boy’s back and legs, before nodding in satisfaction. “Good, now you wait fifteen minutes before going into the water.”

“Okay, **_Aunt May_**.”

“I can tell from your tone that that’s meant to be an insult, but all I’m hearing is the highest form of praise,” Tony said with a smug laugh as Peter rolled his eyes. The teenager grabbed his towel and began to spread it out on the sand, whining as he watched everyone aside from Tony, Loki, and Bucky take off for the water. Peter dropped to his towel and buried his feet in the cool sand, re-adjusting his sunglasses—which he had stolen from Tony—as he looked at the Asgardian prince a few feet away.

“Loki, why are you wearing an actual suit and not a swimsuit?” Peter asked as he stared at the god who was lounging on a chair beneath an oversized umbrella.

“It’s not my aesthetic, Peter.”

“Geez,” Tony mumbled as he turned to Bucky, “the kid even has Shakespeare over there talking like him.” Bucky laughed at the crack, and Peter turned to stick his tongue out at Tony before returning his attention to Loki.

“But how will you go swimming?”

“I wasn’t planning on going in the water.”

“But how are you going to join the splash fight then?”

“Splash fight?”

“Yeah, where you fight by splashing water at each other. I wanted you to help me get the others.”

“Well,” Loki said, clearly chuffed at being invited to join in Peter’s play, “I suppose I may be able to don a pair of those swim shorts for a few minutes.” Peter cheered and scurried to sit beneath Loki’s umbrella, excitedly explaining his idea of how to pull a surprise attack on the other Avengers. Once Peter was off with Loki, Tony looked at the super soldier beside him.

“Bucky, I know how much you love your hoodies, but don’t you think it’s a bit too warm for one? Besides, that’ll get way too heavy in the water.”

“Oh, I’m fine. I probably won’t go in the water anyway.”

“You’re wearing swim trunks.”

“Steve insisted.”

“Ah.” The two of them turned their attention to Loki and Peter, silently watching them discuss their mischievous scheme. After a few minutes, Bucky glanced almost wistfully toward the water. A serene smile spread across the man’s face, unaware that Tony was watching his every move.

“Water sure is pretty, huh? I never get sick of lookin’ at it. Could look at it forever, and it’d still be beautiful.” Bucky mused, his eyes fixed on the sparkling blue waves gently lapping at the shoreline.

“Come on. You clearly want to be in the water.” The soldier simply shrugged as he glanced down at his left arm.

“Hey, you’re not worried about the saltwater hurting your arm, are you? It won’t damage it. Even if it did, I’d fix it for you.” Tony said, wanting Bucky to enjoy himself. He also wanted the opportunity to openly gawk at a shirtless Bucky, but that would only be an added perk.

“Okay…” Bucky said after a brief pause. “In that case, could I borrow your sunscreen?”

“Sure can,” Tony said as he reached to grab the can. When he turned back, Tony’s breath caught in his throat as he watched Bucky finish pulling his hoodie off his head. “I, uh…I can spray it for you if you stand up.”

“Really? Thanks.” Tony watched as Bucky hopped up before quickly scrambling to his feet. His eyes fell to Bucky’s chest as he shook the aerosol can, and he realized that Bucky had not been exaggerating about how badly he was scarred.

“Should I put my shirt back on?” Bucky asked softly, and it was only at that moment that Tony realized he had been blatantly staring at the man’s chest.

“No, of course not,” Tony said as he began to spray sunblock over the man’s torso. He spun Bucky around to spray his back, his head tilting curiously as he noted that though there was still scarring on the man’s back, it was not nearly as prominent.

“Peter’s right. That stuff is cold.”

“Cold, but worth it,” Tony said as he put the lid back onto the sunblock. “All done. Just got to wait fifteen minutes before getting wet.”

“Thanks, Tony,” Bucky said as he turned back around to look at the man. Tony smiled, trying his best not to stare at Bucky’s muscles.

“Hey! It’s been fifteen minutes, right?” Peter said as he walked over to Tony. “Let’s go swimming!”

“You’re just going to leave Loki here? I thought you guys were planning an attack on the others?”

“Not to worry, Anthony. This is all part of the plan.” Loki said with a somewhat sinister smile. Peter turned to smirk at the god, and Tony raised an eyebrow.

“I’m not going to ask…just make sure I’m not included in the attack,” Tony said, and Peter’s evil smile turned to a grin.

“Okay, okay. Come on, hurry up!”

“All right. Buck, you good here?” Tony asked, and Bucky looked at him in surprise before nodding.

“Sure am.”

“Okay, Pete. Let’s go!” The pair ran off toward the water to join the others, and Bucky smiled fondly as he watched them.

“Is something the matter, Sergeant?” Loki asked as he stared inquisitively at Bucky.

“No…why?”

“You’re giving Anthony a strange look.”

“He called me ‘Buck’.”

“Is that not your name?”

“Well, yeah, it is. But only Steve ever calls me that. It’s ‘Bucky’ to everyone else.”

“You and Anthony have become quite close.” Bucky turned to look at Loki as he shrugged his shoulders.

“Guess we have.”

“He seems to be quite fond of you…If you ever hurt him, I can assure you that you will live just long enough to regret it.” Bucky’s head snapped up and he looked at Loki, who was clearly very serious in his threat.

“I know you saw what I did when you touched my head…but I would never hurt Tony like that. I’d rather die than hurt anyone…especially him.” Bucky said as he lowered his eyes. Loki assessed him carefully before leaning back in his chair and crossing his legs.

“I believe you, Sergeant. However, it is quite possible to hurt a person without any harm physically befalling them.”

“What do you mean?”

“Why don’t you ask the Captain?”

“Steve? But Steve never—“

“Sergeant, just how well do you know the Captain?”

“I’ve known him since we were kids.”

“Is he really the same man who went into the ice so many years ago?” Bucky looked up at Loki in surprise, blinking rapidly before returning his gaze to the sand.

_“He did seem a bit different when I first came back,”_ Bucky thought to himself, _“but he went away to think…he apologized, and he seems like himself since…then again, when I’m in front of him, I try to force myself to be more like the old Bucky…what if he’s just forcing himself to be like the old Steve? I mean, we were separated for a long time…”_ Bucky shook his head quickly as he glanced back up at Loki. _“No…he’s trying to play with my mind again. I’m not going to give him the satisfaction.”_ Bucky hopped to his feet as he looked down at Loki.

“I won’t hurt Tony in any way. I can promise you that.”

“Then it seems we will have no trouble with one another.” Without another glance in the god’s direction, Bucky gave a curt nod before wandering away from the towels. With another ten minutes before he could go into the water, Bucky moved to stand near the shoreline. He took a deep breath of the salty air as he stared at the horizon, a broad smile spreading across his face as golden rays of sunshine warmed his back. Bucky remained motionless for several minutes, finding it hard to believe that this blissful moment was his and his alone. He took a few steps forward to step into the cool water when he felt something hard beneath his foot. Looking down, the man stepped aside to see a small, pink seashell in the sand. He crouched down to pick it up, turning it over in his hand several times as his thumb brushed over the shell’s smooth surface. With a grin, Bucky shoved it into the pocket of his swim trunks before he stood up and began to wander down the beach, his attention fixed on the sand.

Bucky found several pretty shells, excitedly depositing each one into his pocket. As he wandered further away from the others, something caught his eye, and he stooped down to examine it. Bucky picked up the object from the sand and dusted it off. In his hand was the loveliest turquoise-colored piece of sea glass. Turning to hold it up in the light, Bucky laughed in delight when he saw that it was the exact color of the water.

“This is perfect.” He said to himself as he slid the treasure into his pocket. Bucky wandered a bit further down the beach where he noticed an iridescent seashell in the sand. He knelt to pick it up, turning the flawless shell over in his hand several times. As he returned to his feet, Bucky was just about to deposit his find into his pocket when he noticed that a young girl nearby was also hunting for seashells. He looked at the shell in his hand and then approached the child, smiling as he held it out.

“This one’s real pretty. Why don’t you take it?” The little girl looked at the shell and started to reach out for it before she looked up at Bucky. To his astonishment, the child hesitated as she looked at him and then slowly started to back away. “What’s wrong, don’t you want it?” Bucky asked curiously. Suddenly, the child burst into tears and ran away, leaving a bewildered Bucky staring after her. He stared at the shell in his hand for a moment before turning to head back to rejoin the others. However, the super soldier had only managed to take a few steps when he heard a commotion behind him.

“That’s him! That’s the man!” Bucky whirled back around to see two lifeguards and an angry woman rushing toward him, towing along the same little girl he had offered the seashell to only a few moments before. He glanced around, but seeing no one else, he pointed to himself.

“Me?”

“Don’t play innocent, you perverted bastard!  You tried to kidnap my daughter!”

“Wha—? No, ma’am! I was just trying to—“

“Can’t you see how dangerous he is?” The woman barked in the direction of the young lifeguards. “You can tell just by looking at his face that he’s up to no good—and look at that arm! He was trying to lure my daughter away, and who knows what he would have done to her. Who knows how many other children he has hurt…” Bucky didn’t hear the rest of the woman’s accusations, her shrill voice no longer intelligible as the pounding of his heart filled his ears. He gripped the shell tightly as he swallowed a lump in his throat, and the man blinked rapidly as tears threatened to spill from his eyes.

_“I don’t want to hurt her. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”_

“Sir, would you mind coming with us until we get it sorted out?” One of the lifeguards asked. The words hardly registered, and Bucky stared at the young man with widened eyes for a moment before slowly nodding.

“But I…I promise...I never wanted t-to…to hurt—“ Bucky jumped as he felt a hand on his back, but relief flooded over him when he saw Tony walk up beside him.

“What’s going on here?”

“Tony Stark! Thank heavens you’re here, this man tried to kidnap my daughter, and I—“

“He **_what_**?” Tony asked, his eyes narrowing as he stared at the woman.

“He tried to kidnap her. He scared her terribly, and she won’t stop crying! I saw him try to lure her away with my own two eyes. Just imagine what this terrifying man would have—“

“Buck, did you talk to the little girl?” Tony asked, cutting the woman off before he did something he would regret. Bucky simply nodded his head, and Tony’s blood began to boil when he realized there were tears in the man’s eyes. “What did you say?” Bucky turned to Tony and held up the seashell.

“She…she was collectin’ ‘em. This one I found...i-it’s pretty. I just…just wanted to give it to her.” Tony put his hand on Bucky’s arm before turning back to the woman, his gaze going from tender to terrifying in a split second. The woman wore a look of astonishment upon hearing Bucky’s words, and she shifted uncomfortably under Tony’s stare.

“Ma’am, this man is a personal friend of mine, and I can assure you that he would never harm a child. Now, if you’ll excuse us.” Tony said with a polite nod to the lifeguards.

“Yes, Sir, Mr. Stark.” The young men said in unison as they exchanged looks of surprise. Tony hurriedly led Bucky away from the group, his hand firmly gripping Bucky’s arm. They were hardly out of earshot when Bucky choked on a sob, and Tony quickly pulled him behind a gathering of large rocks where no one would be able to see the man cry.

“Bucky, why are you crying?” Tony asked softly as he guided the man to sit on a rock. To his surprise, the tearful man wrapped his arms around Tony’s waist and hid his face against Tony’s stomach as he continued to silently cry. “That woman was an idiot,” Tony said as his fingers sank into Bucky’s hair. Bucky did not say a word, and Tony looked down at the top of his head as he continued to thread his fingers through the man’s long locks. When Bucky finally spoke, his voice was trembling.

“I knew I should have left my shirt on. I’m a monster.”

“Stop it.”

“I am. I tried to give the little girl the shell…and she started to take it until…until she looked up at me…She cried and ran away because…I’m scary…and I-I look so scary that when—“

“Bucky, you are not a monster, and you are not scary.”

“Tony, don’t lie to me…it’s okay. I just—” Tony leaned down to kiss the top of Bucky’s head, and Bucky looked up at him in surprise.

“Huh, that works pretty well,” Tony said with a chuckle as he sat down beside Bucky. The super soldier looked at him in confusion, and Tony grinned. “Peter’s trick to get me to shut up and listen.” A small smile tugged at the corner of Bucky’s lips, and Tony nudged the man’s arm with his own. “You know, I was against you coming here. The very thought of you terrified me. But then I got to know you, and I’ve never been happier to be proven wrong. No matter what you look like or what happened in your past, I know you. And you aren’t a monster. You’re the furthest thing from one…you’re one of the sweetest guys I’ve ever met. I feel bad for anyone who doesn’t see that when they look at you.” As Tony spoke, Bucky slowly moved his teary eyes up to look at Tony, hope clearly written on his face. The expression could have killed Tony, and he had to hold himself back from smothering Bucky with affection.

“Be straight with me—do you really believe that? Or are you saying it as my friend?”

“I would never lie to a friend to spare his feelings. That only results in heartache.” Bucky nodded as he looked down at his feet, and Tony watched him intently. “You don’t look like a monster either. That mother looked a lot more like a monster.”

“Tony!” Bucky protested, although the man laughed softly. Tony grinned and shrugged his shoulders.

“It’s true. You’re a handsome guy. And don’t you have proof beyond me telling you that? What about all those girls you were out with the other night?” Tony asked as he nudged Bucky with his elbow. Tony still hated to think about strange girls pawing _his_ Bucky, but as he predicted, Bucky smiled bashfully at the mention of them.

“Thank you for saving me, Tony,” Bucky said as he looked up to meet Tony’s eyes. “I think I was going to have one of those panic attacks. I don’t know what I would have done if you didn’t come find me.” Tony’s heart ached inside of his chest, and he simply couldn’t resist the urge to reach up and gently brush the tears from Bucky’s cheeks with the pad of his thumb.

“Don’t thank me, Bucky Bear. You’ve saved me plenty of times too. That’s what friends do, right?”

“Yeah. You’re right.”

“Good. Ready to head back to the others?” Bucky nodded and hopped up, staying close to Tony as the two walked back up the beach toward the Avengers. As the pair drew closer, they watched Loki—now clad in a garish pair of green and gold swim trunks—enter the water. Almost instantly, everyone fell back as some of the water swirled up into a long pole and froze solid. Tony’s jaw dropped as he watched Peter shoot webs to the top of the pole before swinging down past the others, dragging his feet through the water to create a wave of water that soaked them.

“He brought his web shooters to the beach?” Tony asked in astonishment. Bucky burst into laughter at the scene, and Tony couldn’t help but join him when the collective shouts of Peter’s name could be heard all the way down the beach. “Hold on, I need to get my phone for this,” Tony said as he broke out into a sprint, and Bucky jogged alongside him all the way back to their towels.

“Where’d I leave that thing?” Bucky mumbled to himself as Tony grabbed his phone and began to take a video of the ridiculous water fight that was happening in front of him. Bucky continued to rummage around until he found his phone in the pocket of his hoodie, quickly grabbing it so that he could also take a video. “Shuri’s gonna love this.” He said as he watched the fight through his phone’s screen, and Tony glanced at him with a smile.

After a few minutes, Tony ended his video and lay back on his towel, frowning slightly as he lowered his sunglasses to look over the rim of them.

“Is it just me, or is it less sunny out here?” Tony asked. Bucky glanced down at him, ending the video he had been recording before he plopped down beside his friend.

“Does seem a bit cloudier. Little cooler too.”

“I hope it doesn’t storm. Don’t want the weather to ruin one of Peter’s last days of summer.” Bucky nodded in agreement and Tony nudged the man with his foot. “Why don’t you go join them?”

“Oh, I don’t know…”

“C’mon, you know Peter would love to have you on his team. Besides, you haven’t been in the water yet, and if the weather gets worse, you might not get to.”

“Okay. You convinced me.” Bucky said as he hopped up. “You coming?”

“And mess up this gorgeous head of hair? I’ll pass.”

“Aw, c’mon. I like your curly hair too.” Tony felt his cheeks flush at the compliment, and he laughed in an attempt to cover his bashfulness.

“Go on, Bucky.” The super soldier nodded and sprinted away, leaving Tony to try and remain calm as he admired the man’s muscular body from afar.

* * *

 

“Uh, Loki?” Everyone was heading back to their towels to relax after the splash fight, but Loki held back as he turned toward the super soldier behind him.

“Can I help you, Sergeant?”

“I hope so…uh, I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind using some of your magic to turn this into a bracelet?” Bucky asked as he fished a small, turquoise object from his pocket and held it out toward the Asgardian.

“What is it?” Loki asked, raising an eyebrow as he took the item from Bucky.

“It’s a piece of sea glass that I found.”

“Why do you want this to be turned into a bracelet?”

“Well, I, uh, I thought it’d look nice. That glass is the…the exact color of the ocean. Just lookin’ at it—it makes you kinda happy, right?”

“Yes, well, I’m sorry, Sergeant. I don’t use my magic for trivial purposes.”

“Please? I…don’t know what I can give you in return, but I can owe you a favor…”

“Any favor?” Bucky nodded in agreement and Loki looked Bucky over with a mischievous smirk.

“Haven’t you heard that all magic comes with a price? It’s quite daring to make such an agreement without knowing the terms.”

“It’s all right. I need this.” Bucky said, and Loki tilted his head as he eyed the man, wondering if Bucky’s naivety was inherent or a side effect of having had his mind played with for seventy years.

“Very well then. If you agree. What are you thinking, Sergeant? A delicate silver chain?”

“Could you do something a little more…manly?”

“This is for yourself?”

“No, it’s for Tony.” Loki’s eyebrows shot up in surprise.

“Then…this isn’t a gift for one of your little girlfriends that the Captain was teasing you about earlier? Why would you trade an unknown favor just to have this glass turned into a bracelet for Anthony?”

“Tony…he’s taken such good care of me… he…well, he forgave me for bad stuff I did… he gives me nice things. And he…he always makes me feel better when I’m upset. Tony’s got everything; I got nothing…but when I found this, I thought it’d look good on him…and if you make it nice with your magic, then I can give him something special that no one else has.”

“You really do care very much for Anthony.”

“Sure I do. He’s one of my best friends.” Loki stared at Bucky for several moments before looking down at the glass in his hand. He waved his other hand over the top, a green light emanating from the tips of his fingers. After a moment, Loki opened up his hand, offering the bracelet to Bucky. Bucky took it excitedly, grinning as he looked at the piece of glass which was now attached to a handsome, brown leather cord.

“Thanks a lot. It’s perfect.” Bucky said as he looked back up at the god in front of him. “I really owe you one.” As Bucky turned to run away, Loki put his hand on Bucky’s shoulder, and the super soldier instantly froze in fear.

“Just as I suspected; you **_are_** still scared of me.” Bucky took a step back and Loki held up his hands to show that he had no intention of hurting the man, “I would like my favor returned now, Sergeant.”

“What’s that?” Bucky asked as he slipped the bracelet into his pocket.

“I just want you to answer me honestly. If you are still frightened by me, then why did you approach me for help?”

“I already told you.”

“Yes, to make a bracelet for Anthony. But you could have taken that glass somewhere to have it made.”

“I want to give it to him today.”

“Why?”

“He deserves it.”

“What did he do to deserve this lovely gift?”

“Already said he did a lot…anyway, I just want him to be happy.”

“Is that right?”

“Yeah, so?”

“Just seems a bit odd to me that you would willingly make such a risky payment just to see Anthony smile today rather than tomorrow.” Bucky tilted his head as he squinted his eyes at Loki.

“Why is that odd?”

“I suppose I did not word that statement accurately. What I meant to say was that it does not seem characteristic of the typical Midgardian male friendship.” Bucky’s brows knit together in confusion, but he shrugged his shoulders.

“Our friendship is different,” Bucky said simply, not wanting to reveal his sleeping arrangement with Tony. You just don’t understand, that’s all.”

“Perhaps it’s you who does not understand your friendship with Anthony.”

“Huh?” Loki looked over the man for a moment before shaking his head.

“Nevermind, Sergeant. Thank you for the chat. I found it to be quite enlightening.”

“Glad one of us did, because I sure as hell don’t know what we were talking about,” Bucky mumbled as he began to walk away. “Oh,” He said, turning around to look at Loki once more, “but thank you for making the bracelet.”

“Not a problem, Sergeant,” Loki said, humming thoughtfully to himself as Bucky walked away.

* * *

 

 “Come on, Tony. Just a little longer?”

“Peter, I love you, but I’m not staying in the water. It’s cold now, and I have old bones.”

“Why is it that you’re young when it’s convenient, but you’re also old when it’s convenient?”

“It’s the beauty of being middle-aged,” Tony said as he waded toward the beach. “We’ll stay here as long as you want, but the sky is getting darker, Buddy. Hardly any sunshine anymore.”

“I know.” Peter pouted as he walked alongside Tony, though he grinned a second later. “It has been a fun day though. I’m glad everyone came with.”

“Me too. It has been fun—even though you did soak me and ruin my hair.” Peter flashed Tony an angelic smile and the man gave him an amused look. “Now, I am going to go wrap up in a towel, and you can drag some of the others back into the water.”

“Okay!” Peter raced ahead of Tony, who watched the teenager fondly as he meandered behind. By the time Tony reached the towels, Peter was already being chased back toward the water by Sam, with a laughing Natasha and Steve in tow.

“Tony, how does that boy have so much energy?” Thor asked as Tony walked passed him.

“Beats me. Sure wish he could give me a little of it.” Tony said with a chuckle as he dropped onto his towel. “You usually have a lot of energy though, don’t you?”  

“You could say that again,” Loki said without bothering to look up from his book.

“Brother, you say that as if it’s a negative thing.” Loki glanced up at Thor and raised an eyebrow.

“Is it not?”

“All you do is read and plot your mischievous schemes. It feels good to be active!” Loki narrowed his eyes at Thor before shifting his gaze to Tony.

“Am I incorrect, or does this conversation seem to be giving my brother more energy?” Tony laughed, and Thor stood up.

“It will storm soon. Let’s join Peter until it’s time to leave.”

“I’m reading.”

“You’re obviously one of the boy’s favorites, Loki. Why not spend more time with him before he goes back to school?” Loki eyed Thor for a moment before setting down his book and sliding off his chair.

“Fine. For Peter then.” Thor grinned as he jerked his thumb toward the water.

“Shall we race?”

“No,” Loki said as he brushed past his brother.

“Oh, come on, Loki. Lighten up a bit.”

“No thank you.” Thor stared after his brother before running up behind him and grabbing the prince, lunging toward the water with a protesting Loki in his arms. Tony guffawed as he watched the brothers, turning to Bucky and motioning toward them.

“Loki pretends to hate it, but he loves it when Thor gives him special attention.” Bucky simply nodded, and Tony looked over the man’s features. “You feeling better?”

“Yeah…today’s been really fun.”

“Sure has,” Tony said, shivering as a cool breeze blew over his damp skin. He turned his attention back to the water to watch the others, jerking in surprise when his vision was blocked by something being tossed over his head. He pulled it off and looked at it, surprised to see that the mysterious object was Bucky’s hoodie.

“You’re cold. Put it on.”

“Aren’t you cold?” Tony asked, remembering Bucky’s words from earlier that day. “You should wear it.”

“Nah, I’m dry now. If I get cold I can use a towel.” Tony looked at Bucky before slipping the hoodie over his head, surprised at how large it was on him. He covered his damp curls with the hood and sighed at the warmth the garment provided. “Better?”

“Yeah, thanks,” Tony said, trying to not to think about how terribly charming Bucky was.

“Uh, Tony?”

“What’s up?”

“I have a present for you.”

“For me? Really?” Tony asked in surprise; despite the number of presents he gave, it was rare for him to receive one in return.

“Yeah, it’s just a little thing…” Bucky said as he pulled the bracelet out from his pocket and handed it to Tony. “I thought the color would look nice on you. Hope you like it.”

“It’s great,” Tony said softly as he admired the piece of jewelry in his hand. His heart skipped about five beats as he looked at the bracelet, wondering why Bucky had to be so sweet to him. “Where did you get this?”

“I found the sea glass here…had it made into a bracelet.”

“You mean…you made this for me?”

“Yep.”

“I love it, Buck. Thank you.”

“You really like it?”

“Yeah…but how did you make it into a bracelet?”

“Uh…magic.” Tony eyed Bucky skeptically before chuckling.

“Fine, don’t tell me then.” Tony pushed up the sleeve of Bucky’s hoodie so that he could slip the bracelet onto his wrist. He stared at for several moments, willing himself not to cry.

_“Come on, Tony. Pull yourself together. Bucky really is “friendship goals” as the kid would say…and you’re going to ruin it if you can’t get a grip on reality.”_  As he thought, Tony caught a whiff of Bucky’s cologne from the hoodie he was enveloped in, and he looked back at the bracelet. _“I just want to pretend again…maybe for a few minutes.”_ He looked up at Bucky, his eyes momentarily falling onto the other man’s lips before he looked away. _“Half pretend then…”_ Tony leaned forward, wrapping his arms around Bucky. He glanced to see Wanda and Vision off in their own little world, and knowing that the others were off in the water, he allowed himself to press his face against Bucky’s neck. He felt Bucky return the embrace, sighing softly against the man’s skin.

“I really, really like it. Probably won’t ever take it off.”

“It’s not that nice, Doll.” Bucky chuckled in response.

“Yes, it is.” Tony reluctantly pulled away to look at Bucky. “I don’t get a lot of presents…the ones I do get are usually given to uphold some social norm and not with the intention to make me happy. Thank you for thinking of me. It really does mean a lot.” Something about Tony’s words upset the man, though he did not have much time to dwell on them as he felt a large raindrop hit his cheek. The pair looked up at the sky, and within an instant, a steady drizzle was falling upon them. Bucky draped a towel over his head, keeping an arm around Tony’s waist as the two raced to get under Loki’s large umbrella. Wanda and Vision had the same idea, and the four laughed as they huddled under the umbrella. Thunder clapped in the distance, and lightning lit up the sky as the rest of the Avengers scurried out of the water and back to the beach to gather their belongings.

“I’ll go start my car,” Tony said as he darted out from under the umbrella to grab his things.

“Tony, I left the back windows cracked on my car. Would you roll ‘em up?”

“Sure thing, Cap.” Steve tossed Tony the keys, his brow furrowing in confusion when he realized that Tony was wearing one of his old sweatshirts that he had passed on to Bucky.

“I’ll go with ya. Give me Steve’s keys.” Tony grinned as he threw the keys to Bucky, and Steve stared as he watched the pair run toward the cars.

“Steve, what are you doing? Get your stuff.” Natasha said as she glanced at the Captain who was standing motionless. “We’re getting soaked.”

“Oh…right. Sorry.” The Captain stooped down to quickly gather his things, trying to ignore the sinking feeling in his stomach as he glanced in the direction of the parked cars.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PSA: I've had several comments/questions regarding whether you will get to see some of Tony/Bucky as a couple after they realize they are in love. I just want to set everyone's mind at ease and confirm for you that this fic does not end the moment their love begins. You will see them begin to develop as a couple before the story reaches its conclusion. :) 
> 
>  
> 
> Sidenote that has nothing to do with this fic: I never thought about it until I wrote this chapter, but I really want nothing more than to see Loki interact with Rumpelstiltskin from OUAT.
> 
> Sidenote 2 that has nothing to do with this fic: Did you guys see the picture of Lexi Rabe in her little Spiderman colored dress with Tom Holland at the FFH Premiere? Because it was the cutest thing I've seen all week, and I may have cried at 6 AM when I first saw the picture.


	44. Chapter 44

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so so so sorry I haven't posted in so long. I've had a lot going on lately, and only 1% of it has been enjoyable. I had to have 3! MRIs today, and I'm very claustrophobic, so that was really the cherry on top of my last two weeks. That being said, I got to spend 7 whole hours with my best friend afterward (that's a lot when you're an adult ok) and I feel recharged enough to do a lot of writing and editing for all of you. ♥ Look forward to at least one more chapter of this fic, and if you're interested, I'll also be posting a post-Endgame Peter&Morgan oneshot and the first chapter of the sequel to "Peter Parker's December". All of that will 100% be up by Sunday. :)

“All right, so what are we looking for?” Peter asked Bucky as they walked into the mall.

“Well…I need a new suit and some shoes. Should get some nice clothes so I can stop wearing these things all the time.” Bucky said as he pulled at the fabric of his sweatpants. “But…if I have enough money, I would like to buy some comfy clothes of my own so I can give these back to Steve. I like a nice hat… but they don’t seem to be too popular these days, huh? Let’s see, what else? Oh, should probably get a wallet so I don’t just carry this stuff around in my pocket…. Gee, you think $10,000 is enough for all that? I'm still a little confused by the inflation…”

“Oh, sure it is. You’ll have plenty leftover too. Guess it’s kind of good I brought you shopping instead of Tony. He could spend $10,000 in one store.”

“Really?” Bucky asked, clearly stunned at the thought of spending so much money in one place.

“Yeah, he doesn’t pay any attention to how much anything costs…then again, with the amount of money he has, he really doesn’t have to.” Peter said with a shrug. Bucky nodded silently as he looked around the expansive mall.

“This place sure is huge.”

“Yep. Well, you really want a suit the most, right? Let’s do that first then.” Peter said as he started leading Bucky toward one of the department stores. Bucky followed him, his eyes darting every which way as he tried to take in everything all at once. When Peter turned around and noticed that Bucky was several feet behind him, he slowed his pace, allowing the man to take his time to look around. When they arrived at the men’s section, Peter gestured to the racks of clothing.

“What kind do you want?”

“I suppose I oughta get two colors. Every man needs a blue suit…what should the other color be? Brown?” Peter scrunched up his nose at the suggestion and shook his head.

“How about black?”

“Okay.” Bucky grabbed several suits before heading into the fitting room with Peter trailing behind him. Peter plopped onto the small bench in Bucky's room, pulling out his phone to text Ned until Bucky asked for his opinion on the first suit. “What do ya think?” Peter looked up with a smile, though it quickly faded as he saw Bucky in an oversized, double-breasted suit.

“That's way too big for you. Want me to go try to find it in a smaller size?”

“Smaller? It feels perfect.” Bucky said with a frown as he turned to briefly glance in the mirror.

“Is that how everyone wore them back in your time?”

“Fellas don’t wear ‘em like this now?”

“Not unless they’re like 90.” Peter said before he smirked up at Bucky, “Guess it is kinda fitting for you, huh?”

“Shut up, Kid,” Bucky said with a chuckle as he looked back at the teenager. “Well, how are suits worn these days?”

“Well… hey, you’ve seen Tony in a suit, right? Like that. More fitted to your body. The pants should be shorter and they shouldn’t go up to your armpits either.”

“These do not go up to my armpits!”

“Eh, close enough,” Peter said as he shoved his phone into his pocket. “Gimme those suits and wait here. I'll go find some for you to try.” Bucky waited as Peter left him alone in the fitting room, and he looked at the floor before finally getting the courage to go stand in front of the mirror. Having avoided his reflection as much as possible since the Soldier had been wiped from him, Bucky’s bottom lip trembled as he moved to sit on the bench, looking at anything other than the mirror.

“Okay, I think I have some good options,” Peter said as he reentered the fitting room several minutes later. “Why don’t you try this one on?” With a nod, Bucky took the suit that Peter indicated and changed into it before twirling around.

“Is it supposed to feel this tight?”

“Yep. It looks like it was made for you.”

“Okay, I can get it then. Let me try a black one.”

“Aren’t you even going to see what you look like in it?” Bucky glanced at the mirror briefly before turning back to Peter.

“Looks good.”

“You could **_not_** have seen what you really look like.”

“Peter, just hand me a black one, huh?” Peter frowned, but handed Bucky a black suit as he requested. Bucky quickly changed into the black suit before glancing at himself in the mirror, a small smile appearing on his face as he admired the suit, though he quickly glanced away when he caught a glimpse of his face.

“Wow, I like the black on you!” Peter said as he looked up at Bucky.

“Yeah, I do too…can I afford both of them?”

“Sure you can. I didn’t pick crazy expensive ones.” Peter said with a grin. Bucky quickly changed back into his casual clothes, and once he had finished, the man took a moment to admire the new suits as they hung in front of him.

“I can’t believe I finally get to have my own suit again,” Bucky said as he carefully ran his fingers over the lapel of the black blazer. Peter watched Bucky observantly, his mind spinning with questions he wasn’t sure were appropriate to ask.

“Why don’t we go get some shirts to go with these? Then we can move onto the more casual clothing!”

“Yeah, okay,” Bucky said as he carefully laid the suits over his arm. The pair exited the fitting room to make a quick stop for shirts, though nearly an hour later, Bucky and Peter walked out of the store with much more than just a few extra shirts.

“You’re gonna give Tony a run for his money as the best dressed in the tower.” Peter teased as they walked through the mall.

“You know he’s not in any danger of that happening,” Bucky said with a chuckle, “but don’t let that stop you from telling him that when we get back.”

“I’ll text him now.” Peter pulled his phone out, grinning as he quickly typed out a message and sent it to Tony. “There. Now he can sweat for a little bit—oh! I want to take you in here.” Peter grabbed Bucky’s arm and pulled him into a trendy clothing store. “You want jeans, right?”

“Yeah.”

“What wash?”

“Huh?” Peter blinked as he looked up at Bucky before smiling and shaking his head. “Never mind, I’ll figure that out myself. Why don’t you see if you like anything over there?”

“Okay.” Bucky wandered off in the direction that Peter indicated, his fingers brushing over every piece of clothing that he passed. The man began to pick up various shirts that attracted his attention, having several in hand by the time Peter returned to his side.

“You want to try those on?” Peter asked curiously as he observed the various floral patterned shirts that Bucky was holding.

“I never wore anything like this before,” Bucky said, a grin on his face as he looked down at the shirts in his arms. “These types of patterns were all for the girls before.”

“You like flowers, huh?”

“Doesn’t everyone?”

“That’s fair,” Peter said with a grin as he held up the jeans he was holding. “Got a couple types of jeans I think you’ll look good in. Let’s go try them on.” Peter said as he took the shopping bags Bucky was carrying and handed him the jeans. The pair walked back to the fitting rooms and Peter plopped into a chair outside as Bucky went into one of the rooms and slid the curtain shut behind him. Peter had just finished responding to another text from Ned when Bucky called out to him.

“Uh, Peter? I think the jeans you got me are too small.”

“They shouldn’t be. I got the same size as your other pants. You can’t get them on?”

“Well, I got them on, but they’re pretty tight.”

“They’re supposed to be. I got you skinny jeans. Let me see them.” Bucky opened the curtain, stepping out in a snug-fitting blue shirt covered in tiny flowers along with a pair of medium wash skinny jeans. “They look good on you!”

“They’re two sizes too small.”

“No, they aren’t. You’re supposed to wear them like that.”

“Fashion sure has changed…but I like this shirt a lot.” Bucky smiled as he looked down and admired the shirt.

“I like it too. It looks great with those jeans,” Peter said as he snapped a picture and quickly sent it off to Shuri. “Why don’t you try on the yellow striped tee with the light wash jeans? Those are a relaxed fit, so I think you’ll like them.” Bucky nodded and returned to the dressing room to change into his next outfit.

As Peter was waiting, his phone began to vibrate. He grinned as he looked down at the screen, quickly answering the video call.

“I’m surprised you’re still up!”

“Lost track of time. Just saw your picture as I was heading to bed. Is Bucky getting new clothes?”

“Is that Shuri?” Bucky called from the dressing room. 

“Sure is." Peter said with a laugh," Hurry up so you can show her your next outfit!" Glancing back at his phone, Peter resumed talking to Shuri. "He’s in the fitting room now. We got him a ton of nice clothes and some new suits already. And don’t worry—I didn’t let him get any of those oversized suits they used to wear in the 40s.”

“It’s a good thing you didn’t let him go alone! I liked that last outfit you sent me. The shirt looked great on him.”

“Actually, he picked the shirt out himself. I think we’ll have to find him a few more floral shirts.” Peter looked up as he heard the curtain slide open and he watched Bucky step out in a yellow and white striped ringer tee paired with light wash denim jeans. “Wow, I actually love that,” Peter said as he flipped the camera for Shuri to see.

“Whoa. Bucky, is yellow your color?” Shuri asked, and Bucky smiled bashfully as he moved to Peter’s side.

“Hi, Shuri.”

“Hi, Bucky. I’m glad you’re finally getting new clothes!”

“I told you I was!”

“No you didn’t.” Bucky frowned before scurrying back into the fitting room to retrieve his phone. He stared down at it as he walked back out to Peter’s side. Bucky pulled up his messages and frowned as he held it up for Peter.

“See? I did.” Peter leaned over and looked at it, shaking his head as he pointed to a small red “x” beside the message.

“See that? It means there was an error. Shuri didn’t get the message. Next time that happens, just press and hold the message and then resend it.”

“Oh…” Bucky frowned as he looked at the phone, following Peter’s instructions. When the message sent, he looked at Peter’s phone screen and grinned. “Now, I told you.”

“Yeah, I just got the message,” Shuri said with a laugh. “I liked that floral shirt! Oh, and you need to send me pics of you in your new suits later since Peter didn’t send me any of those.” The girl said pointedly.

“Geez, sorry. You would have forgotten too if you were in my position. He just looked so handsome, I couldn’t think about anything else.” Peter teased. Bucky playfully shoved Peter, and the teenager laughed.

“I can imagine that’s true. Let me see one more outfit before I go to bed. Bucky, did you get a yellow shirt with flowers?”

“No, I think I just got a red one.”

“Bucky, go put on those black skinny jeans, and I’ll see if I can find a yellow one,” Peter said as he hopped up from his chair.

“More skinny jeans?” 

“He wasn’t a big fan of the skinny jeans,” Peter explained with a laugh.

“What? Why not? He looked great in them!”

“See?” Peter said before looking back at his phone. “He said they’re too tight.”

“No, I want to see the black ones!” Shuri protested.

“All right, all right,” Bucky said in exasperation. “If my princess wants me to, I’ll try ‘em on.”

“Good,” Shuri said with a triumphant grin. “Peter, let’s see if you can find a yellow shirt.”

“Okay, be right back,” Peter said as he disappeared back to the front of the store. Bucky returned to the fitting room, slipping off the clothes he had been wearing before he wiggled himself into the black skinny jeans that Peter had chosen. As he tugged at the crotch of the jeans, a shirt flew over the top of the curtain and landed on Bucky’s head.

“Hey, Bucky. Catch!”

“Peter, I think you need to say that before you throw something,” Bucky said with a laugh as he pulled a yellow shirt covered in tiny pink and red flowers off of his head. He quickly donned the shirt before stepping out of the dressing room.

“Boy, you are **_fine,_** ” Shuri said as Peter wolf-whistled. Bucky rolled his eyes and shook his head, though a bashful grin was gracing his face.

“You guys really think it looks good?”

“It looks better than good. Yellow is definitely your color.,” Shuri said, and Peter nodded in agreement.

“You look great in black, but I like these bright colors too.”

“It’s kind of…a nice change, isn’t it?” Bucky asked as he looked down at the shirt he was wearing.

“Yes, it is.” Shuri agreed as she yawned. “I’m going to fall asleep so I should go. Peter, make sure Bucky sends me some pictures of his new clothes. Mother would be happy if I show them to her. She misses her White Wolf.”

“White Wolf?”

“That’s what they called me in Wakanda,” Bucky said with a fond smile.

“Dude, that’s such a cool name. Hey Shuri, give me a Wakandan name.”

“Baby Spider.” Bucky burst into laughter as Peter stared at his phone, completely unamused.

“I know you’re tired so I’ll pretend you didn’t say that.”

“Annoying Spider?”

“Why don’t you sleep on it?”

“I do need to go to bed. G’night, White Wolf. Make sure Annoying Spider helps you carry your bags while you shop.”

“All right, g’night, Doll,” Bucky said amidst his laughter.

“I hate you.”

“No, you don’t,” Shuri said, smugly as she lay down in her bed. “I’ll text you later.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Peter, rolled his eyes before ending the call with a laugh. “Hey, Bucky, why don’t you try on a few more things and then we can get lunch?”

“Sounds good to me. What should I try on next?”

* * *

 

After lunch, Bucky and Peter continued their shopping, accumulating several items at each store they visited. Before they knew it, the day was half over, and they were each carrying several large shopping bags.

“Is there anything else you need?” Peter asked as they strolled through the mall.

“I don’t think I even need this much, really,” Bucky said with a soft laugh. As two teenagers passed them, Bucky glanced curiously in their direction before looking back at Peter. “What is that stuff they have?” Peter turned to look at the teenagers.

“Oh, those are Dippin’ Dots.”

“What is that?”

“The ice cream of the future.”

“That’s ice cream?”

“Yeah, let’s get some!” Peter scanned the mall in front of them before pointing to a stall ahead of them. "Looks like we can get them there.” Bucky nodded and followed Peter, tilting his head when he saw large pictures of the frozen confection.

“I always get rainbow. What flavor do you want?” Bucky scanned the options for a moment as he pulled his new wallet out of his back pocket. “Banana split sounds pretty nice.”

“Okay!” Peter took a step to the left and smiled at the man behind the counter. “Could we get one rainbow and one banana split, please?”

“You bet. That’ll be $6.79” Peter pulled a ten-dollar bill out of his pocket, but Bucky shook his head as he grabbed his debit card.

“I got it, Peter.”

“Nope.” Peter pushed the card away and handed his money to the man.

“Peter!” The teenager smirked at Bucky, and the man behind the counter laughed as he began to count Peter’s change out of the cash register.

“Enjoy it, Son. It’s a rare treat when your kid offers to pay for something.” Bucky blinked, and Peter bit back a laugh as he nudged Bucky with his elbow.

“Yeah, Dad.” Bucky scowled at the teenager who struggled to keep his composure as he accepted his change from the man. Within moments, the two were given their ice cream before they moved to a nearby bench to enjoy their futuristic confections.

“What do you think?” Peter asked after Bucky had eaten a spoonful.

“Weird…but I like it.” Bucky said with a shrug of his shoulders. Peter took a bite, staring at the man for a moment before laughing.

“You’re mad that he thought you were my dad.”

“I am not old enough to be your dad!”

“You’re right. You’re old enough to be my **_grand_ _dad_**.” Bucky glared at Peter as the teenager smugly shoved another spoonful of ice cream into his mouth.

“Fine. I’m old enough to be your granddad, but I don’t look it!”

“Oh come on, that guy’s probably almost as old as you are. His eyes can’t be that great.” Peter said with a wave of his hand. “The beard makes you look older too.”

“Oh…” Bucky said as he reached up to rub his hand over his thick beard. “Been meaning to take care of this…just never got around to it, I guess.”

“Have you trimmed it since you got here?”

“Once or twice…” Bucky said thoughtfully, as he ate more of his ice cream. “Actually, I can’t remember if I have or not.”

“I figured you were going for the hipster vibe. You know with the man bun and the thick beard.”

“Mostly just going for the ‘I can’t be bothered’ vibe, I guess. Huh…I used to care a lot.”

“It just be like that sometimes,” Peter said with a contemplative nod. The two ate in silence for a few moments as they watched other shoppers pass them. When two men, who were clearly a couple, walked out of a store holding hands, Peter quickly nudged Bucky with his elbow. “Hey, look at them. They’re a cute couple.”

“A couple?” Bucky asked curiously as he watched the young men stroll through the mall. They laughed over some shared joke before one of them turned to kiss the other on the cheek. Bucky’s eyebrows shot up, and he continued to watch the couple, not realizing that Peter was watching him just as closely.

“Didn’t Tony and I tell you that it’s okay for guys to be together now?”

“Yeah…just never saw it before.”

“You don’t think it’s wrong, do you?”

“Well…well no. I guess not if they love each other. I just can’t figure it out though.” Bucky said, shaking his head as he looked down at his ice cream.

“What do you mean?” Peter asked, frowning as he continued to study him.

“Just can’t figure out how two men could feel that way about each other.”

“That’s just the conditioning of your time.”

“Huh?”

“That’s what everyone in the 40s said, so that’s the way you think.”

“Well, maybe…I don’t know much about that.”

“Anyway, even if you only like girls, someone could always be an exception.”

“An exception?”

“Sure, you can’t help who you fall in love with, right? Maybe you just love girls and you’ve never been attracted to a man in your whole life. Doesn’t mean that someday you won’t feel that way about a guy.”

“Huh…Well, I’m a hundred-year-old man in the body of thirty-year-old...I also have a fully-functioning metal arm, and I live in a skyscraper with superheroes, so I guess falling in love with a guy really wouldn’t seem strange by comparison.” Peter laughed and nodded in agreement before finishing the last bite of his ice cream. Bucky watched him for a moment before tilting his head.

“Peter, you ever like a guy?”

“Nope. Right now I like a girl from my school. Her name’s MJ. She’s really funny and pretty.” A goofy grin appeared on Peter’s face and Bucky chuckled.

“But if you did like a guy?”

“Then I’d like him. No sense in pretending I don’t, right?” Bucky was silent for several moments before nodding thoughtfully.

“You’re a pretty wise kid.”

“I prefer being called ‘woke’,” Peter said with a grin as he grabbed Bucky’s empty cup and got up to throw their trash away. Returning a second later, Peter bent down and grabbed the bags he had been carrying. “About ready to go home?”

“Yep, I think so,” Bucky said with a smile as he stood up and picked up his own bags. The pair began to walk again before Bucky suddenly turned to Peter, “Actually, could we make one more stop on the way home?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No Tony in this chapter D: But man, Peter sure is working HARD as a little Cupid, isn't he? 
> 
> Where do you think Bucky wants to go on the way home?


	45. Chapter 45

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! Two chapters in a row to thank you for your patience. You guys are amazing. ♥♥♥

“Pardon me, Boss. Peter is requesting that you go to the lounge.” Tony looked up from the paperwork he was doing and glanced at Pepper, who looked up from her laptop and smiled at him.

“I suppose it’s time for a break?” Tony grinned in response as he glanced at one of Friday’s cameras.

“You can tell him I’ll be down in a minute. Do you know what he wants?”

“I’m afraid I’ve been sworn to secrecy.” Tony cocked an eyebrow as he glanced at Pepper.

“Wonder what the kid’s up to. Wanna come with me and find out?”

“Oh, I wouldn’t miss it,” Pepper said as she stood up and closed her laptop. Tony hopped up and walked around the side of his desk, taking her arm in his as he led her out of his office and through the apartment to the elevator. As they rode down to the lounge, Tony sighed softly and Pepper squeezed his arm.

“I’m sure you’ll still see him several days a week after he goes back to school.”

“How’d you know I was thinking about Peter?”

“Lucky guess.” She said with a knowing smile. “Or maybe it’s because I used to be your assistant and I was expected to know what you wanted before you wanted it.”

“Aw c’mon, Pep. You make me sound terrible. Was I really that bad of a boss?”

“No.” The woman admitted with a smile. “But you were the whiniest boss I’ve ever had.” Tony scoffed and Pepper chuckled. “Don’t act like that comes as a surprise to you.”

“Well, it does. My ego has been completely shattered…although a little kiss might give me the strength to start gluing it back together.”

“Hmm...I'm not sure your ego needs gluing back together.”

“Pep!” The woman laughed softly at Tony’s protest before leaning to kiss his cheek.

“There is that better?”

“Yes, thank you. It’s much better.” Pepper rolled her eyes as the doors to the elevator opened, and Tony slipped his arm around her waist as they exited the lift. As they walked into the lounge, Tony noticed most of the tower’s occupants sitting on the couches as they murmured quietly to one another, and Tony raised an eyebrow.

“There you are!” exclaimed Peter, an excited grin plastered to his face. “Hi, Miss Potts.”

“Hi, Peter.” The woman said with a smile. “What’s going on here?”

“You guys gotta sit down. It’s a surprise.”

“Does anyone else here know what it is?” Tony asked as he removed his arm from Pepper’s waist, grabbing her hand as they walked to the last empty sofa.

“Not a clue,” Sam said, sounded irritated.

“I assume it must be pertaining to Sergeant Barnes. He’s the only other person not in this room.” Loki said observantly. Steve grinned, and Sam turned to eye the man suspiciously.

“You know what this is about, don’t you?”

“Bucky text me, so I have an idea.”

“And you didn’t tell me?” Sam asked in mock offense.

“He said not to tell anyone. Said Peter wanted to do a big unveiling. But I don’t even know what I’m going to see.”

“That’s right!” Peter interrupted, a smug grin on his face. “Bucky and I went shopping, and I wanted everyone here for the big reveal of his new look!”

“C’mon, Peter! It’s not a big deal!” Everyone chuckled as they heard Bucky protest from the hallway, and Tony bit his bottom lip because he found the bashfulness heard in Bucky’s voice to be absolutely adorable.

“Don’t downplay this. It is a big deal! Okay, is everyone ready? Come on out, Bucky!”

Bucky stepped out from the hallway he had been hiding in, one hand in his pocket and his head ducked slightly. The room went silent as everyone’s eyes widened, and Tony gasped audibly as his jaw nearly hit the floor. Steve, the only person in the room who was not in complete shock, grinned at his friend. “Well, if it isn’t Bucky Barnes.” The Captain said with a chuckle. “You look sharp, Buck.”

“Thanks, Stevie,” Bucky said, peeking up at Steve as he let out a nervous laugh. The man was clearly embarrassed at being the center of attention, but the sheepish smile that graced his face made it apparent that he liked his new look. Though he had originally been wary of Peter’s suggestion to wear a black shirt and tie with his new black suit, he found himself admiring his reflection in the mirror—something that he had not willingly done in a long time.

While Bucky’s new clothing had done a great deal for his self-esteem, he had received the biggest confidence boost at the salon that he and Peter had stopped at after leaving the mall. Bucky had walked into the salon with long hair and an unruly beard and left an hour later with a classic side part and his beard reduced to a light stubble. Since returning to the tower, Bucky hadn’t stopped running his fingers through his short locks or sneaking glances at his reflection.

Bucky cleared his throat once again; the deafening silence making him uncomfortable as he felt the weight of everyone’s stare. As he shifted uncomfortably, his eyes automatically went to Tony. The man was still staring in shock, and Bucky bit his bottom lip, wondering why his extremely opinionated friend was uncharacteristically speechless.

“What do you think?” Bucky asked hopefully. It was only at that moment that Tony realized he was still gawking at the man, and he quickly waved his hand up and down.

“I mean, Steve’s right. You…you look great.” Tony opened his mouth to say something else, though no words came out, and Natasha jumped in before anyone else had time to notice the way that Tony was gawking at Bucky.

“Yeah, you look really handsome. The hair looks great…and that suit fits you really well.”

“Thanks,” Bucky said sheepishly. “Peter picked the suit.”

“I’m quite partial to the black-on-black styling,” Loki said. “It’s a smart look.”

“I’ve been sitting here trying to think of a wisecrack, but my mind’s a blank. I mean, damn, you look good, Man.” Sam said with a nod. Bucky laughed at Sam’s words as he continued to be barraged by compliments from the others. Peter grinned as he watched, partially happy that Bucky was being showered with so much positive attention, and partially happy that Tony was still so focused on staring at Bucky, that the man had hardly blinked since Bucky had entered the room. Tony continued to gape at the man until Pepper squeezed his arm.

“Tony? I have plans this evening. Let’s go finish up what we were working on before I have to go?”

“Huh? Oh…yeah, sure, Pep.” Tony said, reluctantly tearing his eyes away from the man in front of him. As the pair stood, Bucky turned his attention to Tony.

“Where’re you goin’?”

“Back to my office. We need to finish something up before Pepper heads out. I’ll be back down here for dinner.”

“I’m sorry to run off, but it’s really Tony’s fault I’m so busy,” Pepper said to Bucky.

“Hey!” Tony protested, and Bucky grinned.

“And you really do look very handsome, Bucky.”

“Thank you, Miss Pepper.” The woman smiled as she turned to leave, and Bucky watched as she put her hand on the small of Tony’s back, gently nudging him toward the elevator. As they stepped into the lift, Tony slipped his arms around Pepper before dropping his forehead to her shoulder. The woman reached up to thread her fingers through Tony’s hair as she spoke softly to him. Whatever she said had earned a giggle from Tony, and the doors slid shut as Bucky watched Tony tilt his head to smile up at his CEO. Though he did not even realize it, Bucky’s cheerful expression had been replaced by a tight-lipped frown, and the man found himself staring in irritation at the elevator doors.

“Something wrong, Buck?” Steve asked, pulling Bucky from his thoughts.

“Oh, no…nothing’s wrong,” Bucky said with a small smile as he moved to sit beside the Captain. After distractedly answering the others' remaining questions regarding his new look, Bucky settled back into the sofa, his mind immediately shifting back to Tony. 

_“Miss Pepper should be careful. After all, Tony and her used to date, right? What if…he misunderstands her intentions and gets hurt?”_ Bucky scowled at the thought of Tony crying, and he angrily folded his arms over his chest. _“Well, I won’t let that happen…maybe I should go upstairs and check on him. It’s been nearly half an hour. I’m sure she’s gone by now….well, I’ll wait five more minutes and then go.”_

Bucky shook his leg impatiently as he half-heartedly listened to Thor prattle on about a talking pile of rocks. He only managed to stay in his seat for another two minutes before hopping up and re-fastening the button on his jacket.

“Be right back.” Bucky mumbled as he slipped away from the seating area and into the elevator. “Tony’s floor, Doll.”

“Right away, Sergeant.”

* * *

 

“So…” Pepper said as she shut her laptop and looked across the desk at Tony.

“So...what?”

“Were you not going to tell me that you have a crush on Bucky?” Tony’s eyes widened, and Pepper shook her head.

“Wha—“

“Did you really expect me not to notice the way you were staring at him? I’ve been on the receiving end of that look enough times to recognize it.” She said with an airy laugh. “He is a looker.” Tony stared at Pepper for a moment before sighing in surrender.

“Sure is.”

“Just…be careful, Tony.” The man looked at Pepper questioningly, and she continued as she returned her laptop into her briefcase. “You know, with his past, I—“

“No.”

“Hm?”

“Don’t say anything like that. Don’t bring his past into it. He didn’t have control over that.”

“Well, I know that, Tony…but all of that brainwashing and stuff… surely it messed with his mind? He seems very sweet. I’m sure he wouldn’t intentionally—“

“Pepper, don’t. He wouldn’t unintentionally either. Bucky might have some issues, but he isn’t dangerous.”

“All right, Tony. I’m sorry. If you trust him, then I do too.”

“Good,” Tony said as slumped back in his chair. “Not like it matters much anyway. He’s painfully straight.”

“You say that as if you’ve never had other self-proclaimed straight men throw themselves at you.” Pepper’s statement caused Tony to chuckle, and he shook his head.

“It’s different this time. Those guys in the past all wanted something. Bucky doesn’t. He wouldn’t use me like that anyway.”

“You seem awfully confident of that.”

“Pep, the guy had absolutely no money for months. Couldn’t even afford to buy a stick of gum. I gave him his own credit card, and he has yet to use it. I confronted him about it, and you wanna know what he said? Told me that he wouldn’t use it so that I could trust his friendship is real.” Tony said, groaning in mock disgust.

“He’s quite charming, isn’t he?”

“You don’t know the half of it.”

“And all of this…it’s the reason you’ve been so clingy lately?”

“You always make me feel better, Honey,” Tony whined as he stood up and walked around his desk toward the woman.

“I’m glad I can help.” She said as Tony moved behind her to rub her shoulders. “But do you really think clinging to your ex is going to make you feel better?”

“I’m not clinging to my ex. I’m clinging to my former assistant turned CEO of my company who has always been there for me no matter how ridiculous I was being. It’s not my fault you happen to also be my ex-girlfriend.” Tony leaned to kiss the top of Pepper’s head as the woman chuckled, and she reached up to squeeze his hand.

“Then my word of advice to you is to find someone who can make you happy instead of pining over Bucky…You know, I met a beautiful woman at a party a few months ago. I think you’d adore her. She’s terribly funny, and—“

“Maybe if she’s still single in a few months.”

“All right, Tony,” Pepper said with a nod of understanding. The woman reached out and grabbed her briefcase before standing up and turning to face Tony. “Walk me to the elevator?”

“It would be my pleasure.”

Tony took Pepper’s arm in his, and Pepper looked at Tony as he led her toward the elevator.

“Do I have to worry about you?”

“I’m not a child, Pepper.”

“Really? That’s news to me.”

“Ha ha. Very funny.” Tony said, pretending to be annoyed. Pepper giggled, and Tony’s pursed lips immediately transformed into a grin.

“I try, but you’ve got to know that it’s tiring to banter with the wittiest man I know.”

“I’m sorry. Should I try to be less amusing?”

“I wouldn’t. Your humor is part of your charm. Most of it, actually.”

“I thought it was my adorable face?”

“Where on earth did you get that idea?” Tony narrowed his eyes at the woman's question as she returned his gaze with a smug smile.

“Either you’re getting too good at this, or my brain is fried from all that work you forced me to do today.” 

“Oh, don’t forget that I still need you to go over that last document and return it to me by tomorrow afternoon.”

“Yeah, all right.” As the light above the doors indicated that the elevator had almost arrived, Tony wrapped his arms around Pepper and she smiled up at him.

“Let’s try to do lunch next week?”

“Is this a pity lunch because Peter’s leaving me?”

“Possibly.”

“Fine. I’ll take it.” Pepper laughed and leaned to kiss Tony’s cheek before turning toward the elevator, jumping back towards Tony in surprise when she found herself face-to-face with Bucky.

“Oh my gosh,” The woman yelped as her hand flew up to her chest. The irritation that had been evident on Bucky’s face only a moment before was replaced by embarrassment.

“Sorry, Doll. Didn’t mean to scare ya.”

“Buck, make some noise next time,” Tony said, chuckling in amusement at the interaction.

“Wait…how did you get up—“ Realizing that Pepper had noticed Bucky did not need permission to access his floor, Tony immediately nudged the woman toward the elevator before kissing her cheek.

“Bye, Hon. Wouldn’t want you to be late for your dinner.” The woman narrowed her eyes suspiciously and nodded.

“Bye, Tony. We’ll talk later.” Tony groaned, and Pepper shifted her attention to Bucky. “Goodbye, Bucky. This really is a good look for you.” She said with a cordial smile.

“Thanks, Ma’am.”

Once the elevator was on its way down, Tony turned to Bucky and tilted his head.

“What are you doing up here? You need something?”

“Oh…I just came to see what was taking you so long.”

“It’s only been half an hour,” Tony said with a chuckle. “We were finishing up some work…” Tony trailed off as he stared at the man in front of him, finding himself unable to look away. “I can’t get over how different you look. Not bad different. Good different. Not that you didn’t look good before, but—“

“Thanks, Tony,” Bucky said with a chuckle, and Tony grinned sheepishly in response. “You know…uh, actually I came up here because I was a bit worried about you.”

“What? Why?”

“Well…I heard you used to date Miss Pepper. I just thought things might get uncomfortable if—“

“Oh, don’t worry about that. Pep and I were friends long before we dated and we’re still friends now.”

“I see.”

“Why don’t we head back downstairs?” Tony suggested, ”I’m getting hungry.”

“Oh, sure thing,” The elevator returned to their floor a moment later, and Tony hurried inside the car, glancing at Bucky out of the corner of his eye as they descended to the lounge.

_“How is he so handsome? I don’t know what I’m going to do when that Adonis crawls into bed with me tonight.”_

* * *

 

“Are you sure this is okay? I don’t want to take up all your space…”

“I told you it’s fine. You’re hardly taking up much room. Besides, if you keep wearing my clothes because you’re too lazy to go get your own, the others are going to notice. It’s just easier for you to keep some up here.” Bucky nodded in agreement as he loosened his tie and unfastened the top button of his shirt.

“Makes sense.” Bucky pulled off his tie and threw it over a hanger before slipping off his blazer and putting it on the same hanger. The man continued to unbutton his shirt, and Tony cleared his throat as he began to step away from the closet. “Where ya going?” Bucky asked, and Tony sucked in a breath as he felt the man grab his waist.

“I’m, uh…going to put my pajamas on”

“How ya gonna do that when they’re in here?”

“Oh…good point.” Tony laughed awkwardly, and Bucky chuckled as he released his friend.

“Did you work too hard today?

“Pepper did work me pretty hard, but it wasn’t that…” Tony trailed off as he watched Bucky remove his shirt before forcing himself to turn away and grab his pajamas, “…bad.”

“Wish you didn’t have to be so busy now.”

“You and me both. Would much rather just lay around with you—and Peter.” Tony added quickly. “But compared to the average working man, I’ll still have far more free time to enjoy myself, so I don’t have a right to complain.”

“Hm…Hey, Tony?”

“Yeah?” Tony asked, turning his back to the man as he slipped off his shirt before pulling a tank top over his head.

“Speaking of work…do you think anyone would hire me now? I’ve got a phone and a bank account...I know I still got the arm, but I look nicer all cleaned up, so maybe if I wear long sleeves—“

“Your arm has nothing to do with it. They passed a law back in the ‘90s forbidding discrimination against potential employees with disabilities.”

“Disability?” Tony turned around, swallowing thickly as he stared at the shirtless man.

“That’s what they’d classify your arm as, Buck,” Tony said before quickly turning back around. “Although I know it doesn’t prohibit you from doing anything. Shuri did a great job.”

“Yeah, she did.” Bucky smiled as he looked down at his arm, and Tony quickly finished changing before stepping out of the closet. Bucky watched the man disappear into the other room, pulling a soft, new t-shirt over his head before following Tony.

“Anyway, are you sure that you’re ready to go back to work? You’ve got money now, and more coming soon. Plus you always have that card I gave you.” Tony said as he plopped onto the bed.

“Told ya I’m not going to use that thing.”

“Well, you should.”

“Well, I won’t.”

“Stubborn.”

“Pot calling the kettle black now, huh?” Bucky asked with a smirk. Realizing just how chiseled Bucky’s cheekbones were, Tony nodded distractedly in response. Curse Bucky for shaving.

“I mean...I’m really not that stubborn. Not any more than anyone else is.”

“Uh-huh,” Bucky said with a skeptical chuckle as he turned and walked into the bathroom. Tony watched the man disappear before releasing a deep breath and collapsing back against the pillows.

_“My god. He is actually hotter than Thor.”_

“Doll, where’s the toothpaste?” Bucky asked as he poked his head out of the bathroom.

“Uh…in the shower.”

“Why?” Bucky asked as he vanished from sight.

“I brushed my teeth in there…tried to save myself some time.” Upon hearing the mellifluous sound of Bucky’s laughter floating out of the bathroom, Tony covered his face with a pillow and, forgetting that Bucky had an increased ability to hear things, promptly yelled into it to muffle the sound. Tony went limp, leaving the pillow over his face. Bucky stepped out of the bathroom with a toothbrush in hand, an eyebrow raised as he stared at Tony.

“Everything okay?”

“Peachy.”

“Then why’re you layin’ there with a pillow on your head?” Bucky asked in amusement.

“I always do this.”

“Since when?”

“Since always.” Bucky shook his head and chuckled as he stepped back into the bathroom to finish brushing his teeth. He returned a few moments later to find the pillow still on Tony's head, and he slowly walked up to the bed, removing the pillow from Tony's face and tossing it aside as he looked down at Tony.

“Excuse me, that was blocking the light. Please put it back.”

“Why don’t ya move over so I can get into bed and Miss Friday can turn the lights off?”

“Move over?”

“Tony, you’re on my side of the bed.”

“I think your side might be more comfortable than mine. Let’s switch.” Bucky stared down at Tony before leaning over and scooping him up.

“Hey!” Tony would have protested more; however, he enjoyed Bucky picking him up far more than he should have. Bucky knelt on the bed and dropped Tony onto the other side before crawling under the covers with a smug grin.

“Thanks for warming my side of the bed up.”

“What is wrong with you?”

“Me? I’m not the one acting like a kid.”

“I’m just tired.” Tony scoffed as he stared at the ceiling. Bucky turned his head slightly to glance at the man.

“Miss Friday. Lights, please?” The lights dimmed and the two men lay in silence for a moment before Bucky reached out and put his hand on Tony’s arm. “You okay?”

“I’m fine.”

“If you were fine, you’d be hugging my arm like you do every other night.” Tony stared into the darkness, holding back a sigh of exasperation. The domesticity of their arrangement drove Tony mad. It was everything he wanted with the person he wanted, and yet it was nothing more than a teasing glimpse at the happiness for which he yearned.

_“Maybe I’ll just roll over and kiss him right now. Sure, he’d be shocked at first, but he would kiss me back, right? Maybe?”_ Tony closed his eyes as he envisioned himself actually following through with it. Bucky would be surprised, but then he would wrap his arms around Tony and return the kiss. His hand would slowly run down Tony’s spine and then sneak under his shirt and—suddenly, a different image replaced his fantasy. The image of Bucky pulling away in disgust, Bucky yelling at Tony before storming out of his apartment and returning to Steve’s floor. Bucky would stop trusting him, and their friendship would be irrevocably damaged. Sure, Bucky would eventually forgive him, but things wouldn’t be the same. They would sleep in separate beds and both of their nightmares would return. He would go back to spending long, lonely nights in his lab while Bucky cried alone in the darkness. _“Imagine if he had those hallucinations all alone…I don’t think he’d even tell Steve about them. Those really get to him…he needs me to calm him down.”_

“Doll?”

“Huh?”

“I asked if you’re sure nothing’s wrong.” Tony sighed softly before rolling onto his side, inching closer to Bucky until he felt the cool metal of Bucky’s arm pressed against his cheek.  

“Just real tired.”

“All right then, I’ll shut up,” Bucky said, and Tony could hear the smile in the man’s voice. Bucky turned onto his side to face Tony, who tried to remain calm when the other man entangled their legs together.

“Wait…we didn’t get to talk much today.”

“I thought you were tired.”

“I could talk a bit.”

“All right, whaddya want talk about?”

“Uh…your new look. I like it. Peter helped you?”

“Yep. Shuri too.”

“You get a lot of suits?”

“Just two. A blue one and a black one. I need to show you the other clothes I got. Really nice stuff. I even got some shirts with flowers on them; I got a pink shirt too!”

“You sound excited about that,” Tony said, a small laugh escaping his lips.

“I am. Guys didn’t get to wear shirts like that when I was growing up. You’d only see patterns and colors like that for the girls.”

“You have an eye for pretty things, don’t you?”

“Oh, I don’t know about that,” Bucky said with a chuckle.

“You do. The kids decorated your room to suit your taste and it’s lovely… and what about this bracelet you gave me?” Tony asked as he reached up to feel the sea glass on his wrist.

“Maybe I just appreciate it more now.” Tony hummed in acknowledgment before the pair fell silent for a few moments.

“Wish I could have gone shopping with you and Peter, but I’m glad you guys had fun—even if it was without me.”

“I’m sure you had fun with Miss Pepper.”

“I wish. She was in a very no-nonsense mood today.”

“Really? Didn’t seem that way when I came up here.”

“She tolerates my shenanigans more once our work is finished,” Tony said with a chuckle. Bucky frowned to himself as he recalled the way that Tony and Pepper had been embracing one another. Irrationally irritated by the mental image, Bucky inched closer to Tony, hooking his arm around the man’s waist.

_“Miss Pepper seems awful nice, but there’s just something I don’t like about how close they are...guess I don’t want him to get hurt.”_ Feeling an overwhelming sense of what he assumed to be protectiveness, Bucky pulled the other man to him until their chests were touching. Tony closed his eyes and laughed softly.

“It’s strange to not feel your hair getting in my eyes.”

“Yeah?” Bucky asked, his features softening, “It feels strange not to have it hanging around my face. But…I’m pretty happy with it. I couldn’t handle the long hair.”

“If you hated it so much, why didn’t you cut it sooner?”

“I didn’t say that I hated it…it’s just that I didn’t choose that for myself. **_They_** chose it. Like they did for everything else in my life. I still have a hard time deciding what I want…but I made the decision today.” Bucky said, pride evident in his voice. “You wanna know something else?”

“What’s that?”

“Right before I got my hair cut, I looked in the mirror. Actually looked at myself. I’ve been too scared to do that because…for so long, I had flashbacks of the soldier every time I saw my reflection. But I didn’t have that today. It was just…me.

“Yeah?”

“And lately my mind seems clearer too. It doesn’t take me as long to remember stuff.”

“That makes me so happy, Bucky Bear,” Tony said, yawning as he nuzzled his face into the crook of Bucky’s neck.

“Me too.”

“We should celebrate.”

“Yeah?”

“Mhmm.”

“All right.” Bucky moved his hand up and ran his fingers through Tony’s hair for several minutes before lazily dropping his arm back over the man. “Tony?” When he received no response, Bucky closed his eyes as he leaned his cheek against the top of Tony’s head. “Good night.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bucky being jealous af of Pepper and not even realizing that he's jealous is mood. 
> 
> ALSO BUCKY CUT HIS HAIR. Btw if you're curious, I 100% stole Bucky's look in this chapter from Seb at the CA:TWS premiere lmao


	46. Chapter 46

_“Where’s Bucky?” Tony asked as he strolled into the living room to find Peter playing video games on the couch._

_“Tony…” Peter glanced up in concern, and Tony’s brow furrowed._

_“What?”_

_“You know he moved out months ago…”_

_“Moved out...months ago?”_

_“You remember that, don’t you?”_

_“Oh…sure…” Peter narrowed his eyes, and Tony chuckled in confusion before he turned and ran into the elevator._

_“Friday, take me to Steve’s floor.” The elevator felt as if it were freefalling, and Tony clutched one of the handrails so tightly that his knuckles turned white. When the elevator abruptly stopped a moment later, Tony fell to his knees as the doors slowly slid open. Steadying himself, Tony stepped out onto Steve’s floor and made a beeline for Bucky’s room. When he found that the door was ajar, he entered without knocking. As he stepped inside, a gasp escaped Tony’s lips while his eyes scanned the empty room. Everything was gone. The only thing that remained in the room were the curtains on the windows and some cobwebs in a corner._

_“Bucky?” Tony called out as he walked into the bathroom. There were no towels on the hook and no toiletries in the shower. If it weren’t for the faint lingering of the man’s cologne, it would be as if Bucky had never been there at all._

_“What are you doing in here?” Tony whirled around to see Steve standing behind him._

_“Where is Bucky? I can’t find him anywhere.”_

_“That’s because he doesn’t live here anymore, Tony. You should know that. You’re the reason he’s gone.” Steve spat out in an accusatory tone._

_“My fault?”_

_“I’d move out too if a man told me that he was in love with me.”_

_“W-what?”_

_“Especially if that man were you.”_

_“Steve, I—“_

_“Cut the crap, Tony. You know, when Bucky first moved in, I was worried that you would make him uncomfortable…but I never thought you would manipulate him the way you did. Acting like his friend…divulging secrets about yourself just so that he would trust you. So you could have him in your bed every night. So you could touch him. You disgust me.”_

_“I never pretended! I needed him, and he needed me! It’s not my fault that I fell in love with him!” Tony felt hot tears roll down his cheeks as he defended himself against his angry friend._

_“He never needed you. That was a lie you told yourself from the beginning.”_

_“No, that’s not—“_

_“Bucky never cared for you. He just felt guilty about what the Winter Soldier did to your parents.”_

_“No…” Steve became blurry as Tony’s vision clouded with tears. “Bucky and I are friends.”_

_“Oh really? Is that why you two haven’t spoken in six months? Why Bucky blocked your number? Why he filed a restraining order against you after you showed up at his house in the middle of the night? Get it through your thick skull, Tony. Bucky doesn’t want you in his life. He doesn’t want to be friends with you, and he sure as hell doesn’t love you. Do you think you can do that? Or should I remind you once again how disgusted he was when you confessed your undying love for him?”_

_“Stop…” Steve’s words cut through Tony’s heart, and Tony sobbed as he fell to his knees._

The moment his knees came into contact with the tile of the bathroom floor, Tony awoke from his nightmare. He bolted upright into darkness, gasping for air as he furiously wiped at the tears streaming down his face. Tony reached out for Bucky as he choked on a sob. When he did not feel the man beside him, Tony turned to see that he was alone. Panic seized him, and he turned to crawl toward the edge of the bed, hoping desperately to see a sliver of light from beneath the bathroom door.

“Bucky?” Tony asked, voice trembling. When he noticed that the door to the bathroom was halfway open and the lights were off, Tony’s breath caught in his throat. “No…” He curled into himself, sobbing as he rocked back and forth. A sliver of light illuminated the room as he reached up to clutch at his chest, and Tony looked up to see a shadowy figure opening his bedroom door.

“Tony? What’s wrong?” Tony looked up in disbelief at the sound of Bucky’s gentle voice.

“Bucky?” Relief filled Tony’s voice as Bucky moved to sit beside him, and he reached out to touch the man before quickly pulling his hand back.

“I’m here, Doll.” Bucky said as he reached out to run his fingers through Tony’s hair.“Are you okay?” Tony gave a quick nod in response before squeezing his eyes shut. He tried, and failed, to focus on his breathing.  When he began to hyperventilate a few moments later, Bucky leaned forward to pull Tony up into his arms.

“Calm down. Everything’s okay.” Bucky whispered sweetly as his hand ran soothingly over Tony’s back; when he found himself on Bucky’s lap, Tony only cried harder.

_“He’s going to leave me if he finds out. He’s going to think I’m manipulating him…but I’m not…I’m not, am I?”_ Tony suddenly questioned himself, wondering if he **_was_** taking advantage of their friendship. _“What if Bucky is only my friend because he feels guilty? What if he hates me touching him? What if he hates touching me? What if...”_

“Sweetheart, I’ve never seen you like this.”

_“Sweetheart?”_ The term of endearment interrupted Tony’s downward spiral, and he tilted his chin to look up at Bucky. It was clear that the man was genuinely worried about him. _“That’s right…he calls everyone ‘Doll’, but I’ve never heard him call anyone else ‘Sweetheart’. He does care…he is my friend because he wants to be, right?”_

“Tony, please say something,” Bucky said as he used his thumb to gently brush the tears from Tony’s cheek.

“Where were you?” Tony asked, mentally cursing when he heard how childish his question sounded.

“I was watching TV. I’m not sure why, but I couldn’t fall asleep tonight. Told Miss Friday to wake me if you had a bad dream.” Tony simply nodded in response, and Bucky looked over the man’s tear-stained face and reddened eyes. “Which dream was it?”

“A new one.”

“Do you want to tell me about it?”

“No.”

“Doesn’t it make you feel better to talk about your bad dreams?”

“Not now.” Bucky nodded and slid Tony off his lap before lowering himself down to the mattress to curl up beside his friend.

“Go back to sleep. I’ll stay with you.”

“Why?”

“What do you mean?” Bucky asked, tilting his head to get a better look at Tony’s face.

“You can go watch TV. You don’t have to stay in here if you don’t want to sleep.”

“Do you want me to leave you alone?” Tony’s breath caught in his throat, and he unconsciously gripped Bucky’s arm.

“I want you to do whatever you want.”

“Then I’m staying,” Bucky said as he glanced down at Tony’s hand, “I don’t know what you dreamed about, but remember that whatever it was, it either wasn’t real, or it can’t hurt you anymore.”

“What if it’s something that could still hurt me?”

“Impossible.”

“How can you be sure?”

“Because I won’t let anything hurt you.” Tony looked up, his eyes locking onto Bucky’s. The man’s blue-grey eyes were filled with a steely determination; though the moment his eyes met Tony’s, they softened with an inexplicable tenderness that Tony was sure he could not have possibly imagined.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to fall back asleep…I want to go watch TV.”

“Okay, Doll,” Bucky said, slowly pulling away. When Tony crawled across the bed and stood up beside him, Bucky slung his arm around his waist and pulled him close. As he led Tony to the living room, Bucky realized that his friend was still trembling. With a frown, Bucky moved to lie down on the couch, spreading his legs slightly before he gently pulled Tony down to lay on top of him. As he grabbed his blanket and spread it over Tony, the genius looked down at him with owl-like eyes.

 “Are you okay with watching ‘I Love Lucy’?” Bucky asked as he glanced down at his friend. Tony blinked a few times before nodding. When Bucky grabbed the remote, Tony dropped his head to Bucky’s chest, prompting the man to rub soothing circles into his back. By the time the first episode had finished, Tony was fast asleep on Bucky’s chest. When Bucky looked down and saw that Tony was sleeping, he smiled. Without giving it a second thought, he ducked his head down to kiss the top of Tony’s head before slowly pulling back.

_“Why’d I just kiss him?”_ Confused by his action, Bucky only reflected upon it for a moment before brushing the thought away. _“He likes physical affection is all. Not like I kissed him the way I’d kiss a dame.”_ The thought made Bucky chuckle, and he turned his attention toward the television as the next episode of “I Love Lucy” began to play; he barely made it through two more episodes before he too fell asleep.

As Tony slowly woke up, he felt a throbbing pain behind his eyes. With a groan, he turned to bury his face between the back of the couch and Bucky’s armpit, prompting a laugh from the man beneath him. Tony tilted his head slightly as he cracked open an eye to peek up at Bucky.

* * *

 

“Good morning.”

“Mm. Mornin’.” Tony mumbled as he nuzzled his face back into Bucky’s arm. “It’s too bright.”

“Headache?”

“Mhmm.”

“Peter, would you close the blinds?”

“Peter?” Tony asked as his head snapped up. Having moved too quickly, he reached up to rub his eyes as his head began to swim. A moment later, the light in the room was drastically reduced, and Tony opened his eyes to see Peter approaching them, an annoying smirk on his lips.

“Yes, Tony? Are you comfortable enough?” Peter giggled as Tony shot him a look of annoyance. Bucky smiled, though he was unsure why Peter was laughing.

“You slept pretty late. It’s nearly ten o’clock.” Bucky said, idly tapping his fingers against Tony’s waist as he spoke.

“That late?” Tony reluctantly pulled himself out of Bucky’s arms, suddenly extremely self-conscious due to the smug little Cupid who was watching them. Bucky released him without a word, and Tony wondered if he had imagined the pout that had momentarily perched upon Bucky’s lips.

“Yep, I made Bucky coffee earlier. Want me to get you a cup?”

“Would you?”

“Get him water first,” Bucky said as he swung his legs over the couch to stretch.

“I don’t want water,” Tony said to Peter. Bucky ignored him.

“Get him water.”

“Water it is,” Peter said, grinning as he heard Tony scoff behind him.

“So he listens to you now?”

“When it concerns your health, yes,” Bucky said, smiling as he straightened up and reached out to nudge Tony’s arm. “You cried a lot last night. It’s no wonder you have a headache. Coffee’ll make it worse if you don’t have water first.”

“Fine.”

“Are you ready to talk about last night?”

“No.”

“Just tell me if you want to, okay?” Tony looked up at Bucky, whose eyes were full of concern.

“I will. Thanks.”

“Here ya go!” Peter said as he strolled back into the room with a large glass of water. He handed it to Tony along with some Tylenol before flopping onto a chair. “I’ll get you coffee once you finish that.”

“Thanks, Bud,” Tony said, quickly downing the pills before taking several long sips of water.

“You know, I was thinking that—“ Suddenly interrupted by an alarm blaring throughout the tower, Tony whined in protest. “Turn it off Friday!”

“Sorry, Boss. Agent Fury is calling the Avengers for a mission out of state.”

“Great…and I haven’t even had my coffee yet.” Tony grumbled as he stood up, downing the rest of his water before slamming the empty glass down onto the coffee table. “C’ mon, Kid. Looks like we’re going on one more mission before summer’s over.”

“All right!” Peter bolted past Tony, his pajama shirt already off his head before he made it into his room. Tony squeezed the bridge of his nose as he pushed open his door and walked to the closet. It was going to be a long day.

* * *

 

Bucky let out a sigh as he stared up at the ceiling. It was nearly 3 PM and there was still no word from the others. Not having expected them to be gone so long, Bucky began to worry.

_“Well, Miss Friday did say it was an out of state mission…maybe that’s all.”_

Deciding it would be wise to distract himself, Bucky got up and wandered into Tony’s office. Only having been in the office once or twice before, he began to curiously poke around. After deciding not to look inside Tony’s desk without his permission, Bucky moved over to one of the large bookcases that lined the wall. He scanned the book titles, occasionally taking one off the shelf to flip through it. Toward the bottom of the shelf, he spotted a brown, leather-bound book without a title on its spine. Bucky picked it up to find that it was not a novel, but a photo album. He eagerly carried it over to Tony’s desk and sat down in his chair. Carefully opening the album, he began to flip through a few pages, smiling as he saw pictures of a young Tony.

_“He sure was a beautiful baby.”_ Bucky thought as he continued to turn the pages. Most of the pictures were of Tony by himself, with an older couple he did not recognize, or with Maria Stark. Though he couldn’t handle more than a glance at any picture with Tony’s parents, he noted that there were very few pictures of Howard. When Bucky turned to the last page of the album, his mouth fell open in surprise before he laughed aloud.

“This is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen!” Bucky stared down at a picture of a six-year-old Tony dressed up as Captain America, posing with one of Howard’s prototypes of Steve’s iconic shield. Bucky pulled out his phone and snapped a picture. He was just about to send it to Steve when he realized that he would be unable to explain how he had gotten ahold of the photo. Bucky kicked his foot against the floor, sighing as he deleted the message. Turning his attention back to the photo, a smile returned to his face before he closed the album. As he stood up to return the album to its shelf, Friday’s voice broke the silence.

“Sergeant Barnes, while I have no official update for you at this time, I would like to inform you that the Avengers are being covered live on the channel 7 news.”

“Really?” Bucky asked, quickly putting the album away. “Could you get that up for me, Doll?”

“Right away, Sergeant. Would you like it in the living room?”

“Please.” Bucky charged down the hallway and into the living room, sailing onto the couch as he stared at the TV. “They’re in DC?” He asked in disbelief as he noticed the Capitol building in the distance behind the fight.

“Yes, Sergeant.”

“Can you tell me anything else?”

“I’m afraid that is all I can tell you.”

“Thanks anyway,” Bucky said as he watched the action. He watched with interest, noting that several of the assailants were wearing similar uniforms to the enemies he had helped to fight on the mission he had joined. He watched as Steve threw his shield at an attacker before swiftly turning and giving a roundhouse kick to someone running at him from the opposite direction. Without a second glance, Steve reached back to catch his shield before bringing it down a third enemy’s skull.

“Atta boy, Stevie,” Bucky said with a proud grin. He then scanned the area for Tony, smiling as he noticed Peter using one of his webs to swing from a tree. When he finally spotted Tony, he saw the man flying around in the air and shooting his blasters at enemies on the ground. “Oh, he must be Natasha’s backup.” He murmured to himself as he watched the woman on the ground give Tony a signal. The camera panned to Thor, and Bucky’s mouth gaped as he watched the god summon lightning and bring it down on his opponents.

“Wow…” Bucky settled back against the couch and propped his feet up on the coffee table as he watched the news. He released a melancholy sigh as the camera returned its focus to Sam and Steve, and Bucky found himself wishing that he were part of the action as well.

_“Feel so useless just sittin’ here. Even Peter is out there...”_ Bucky ran his fingers through his hair before grabbing a pillow and pulling it over his face to muffle an irritated groan. After a few moments, he pulled the pillow down just enough to peek over the top of it. The camera was still focused on Steve and Sam when a loud sound was heard in the background. Both men tossed worried glances behind them, and the camera quickly panned across the chaos. Bucky dropped the pillow and leaned forward as he watched Tony returned to his feet, surrounded by piles of smoldering rubble.

_“Was that an explosion?”_

As Tony straightened up, he saw that the man had been shielding Natasha beneath himself. He helped the woman to her feet, holding her by the waist as he turned to raise his blaster against new assailants. He watched Natasha leaning against Tony as she scanned the area with a tight-lipped frown on her face. Once the new opponents had been shot down, Bucky watched in horror as Tony disarmed his suit.

_“What is he doing?”_

Once the armor had returned to his arc reactor, Tony ripped it from his chest and handed it to Natasha. Bucky watched with widened eyes as Natasha shook her head. She and Tony exchanged heated words for several moments as Tony wildly gestured toward her leg. Another explosion was heard in the background before Bucky watched Tony put the arc reactor on Natasha’s chest and activate it. Tony muttered some words as he slipped on his glasses, and the Iron Man suit containing Natasha disappeared into the sky.

_“Tony…what are you doing?”_ Fear gripped Bucky, and he watched as three men charged at Tony. Tony kicked the first enemy behind the knees before bringing his elbow down between the man’s shoulder blades. The second man got a knee to the groin before Tony brought his elbow down into the middle of the man’s back. Before going down, the man got in a hard blow to Tony’s stomach, and Bucky bit his lip as he watched Tony double over in pain.

“Tony, there’s a third one!” Bucky screamed as if Tony would somehow hear the warning. Just before the final assailant reached him, Tony turned around and shot the man with a blaster at close range. Bucky stared at the scene in confusion until he realized that Tony had a gauntlet on his right hand. A smile curled up on Bucky’s lips as he watched Tony fight without his armor.

_“He might be small, but he’s one of the best damn fighters there.”_ Bucky relaxed as he watched Loki and Peter make their way over to Tony. That is, until he saw something small roll toward Tony’s shoes.

_“No…”_ Scooting back to the edge of his seat, Bucky shook his head quickly as Tony noticed the grenade at his feet. Tony lifted his foot to kick it away, though he briefly hesitated to look around.

“What are you doing? Kick it!”  When Tony sidestepped the explosive and kicked it to the left a split-second later, Bucky realized that Tony had made sure to send it in the opposite direction of the other Avengers and observing civilians. Gripping the pillow on his lap, Bucky’s breath caught in his throat as he watched the grenade soar away from Tony. Just as he began to breathe again, an explosion lit up the street. When the smoke cleared away a moment later, Tony was lying motionless on the ground with Peter standing over him.

“No…no, no, no!” Bucky shouted as he stood up and moved closer toward the TV. “Stand up, Tony!”  All at once, three more grenades were simultaneously thrown by the few remaining attackers. Steve threw his shield directly at one to knock it up to Sam, who caught it and threw it far as he could before flying quickly toward the ground. Using Stormbreaker, Thor hit the second one far above the earth, while Wanda sent the final grenade up toward the other two. Within seconds of each other, the three grenades exploded in the sky like fireworks. Wanda worked quickly to contain the shrapnel to the sky before slowly lowering it to the ground to keep it from raining on nearby civilians. Bucky watched, confused as the remaining assailants seemingly gave up and attempted to flee the scene before his eyes wandered back to Tony. His stomach twisted into a knot as he watched Loki pick up the motionless hero, and tears filled Bucky’s eyes as he noticed Peter subtly clutching Loki’s cape as he walked beside the god.

_“Please be okay, Tony.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My poor baby Tony :(


	47. Chapter 47

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please enjoy this chapter. I had a lot of fun writing it. Also please feel free to discuss it in the comments despite the somber endnote - I love reading your thoughts and theories.

Everything was loud. Too loud. The headache Tony had woken up with that morning had turned into a full-blown migraine, and his entire body ached. He tried to move, sucking in a deep breath as he felt pain surge throughout his body. After taking a deep breath, Tony pried his eyes half-open. Through his lashes, the man saw Peter sitting behind him. Forcing his eyes open all the way, Tony plastered a small smile onto his face.

“Hey, Buddy.”

“Tony? Dr. Banner, Tony’s conscious!” Tony winced at the volume of Peter’s voice, and the boy frowned as he leaned over the bed and lowered his voice. “Sorry, was that too loud? Are you okay? You know who I am, right?”

“Of course I do, Peter,” Tony said before licking his dry lips. “Water?” Peter hopped up to get the drink as Bruce entered the room.

“Do you know where you are?” Bruce asked while approaching the bed.

“The Starship Enterprise?”

“Glad to see that your sense of humor wasn’t hurt,” Bruce said as he slipped on a pair of gloves. “Do you remember what happened?”

“Some type of explosive?” Tony asked as Peter returned with the water. He tried to reach out for it, but Peter bypassed his hand and moved the cup to his lips to help him drink.

“You were lucky, Tony. Most of your wounds are superficial. I finished removing the shrapnel while you were out, but I’ll need to put a few stitches into the gash on your right shoulder and your outer right thigh. Everything seems okay right now, but there is a lot of bruising. I’m going to have Friday monitor you for the next day or two to make sure that there is no internal bleeding.” Tony nodded his head in response before allowing his eyes to close. A few seconds later, his eyes flew back open, and he gasped loudly.

“Nat?”

“She’s fine, thanks to you. Friday brought her straight back here like you asked. She already set her leg herself. You better watch out though; she seems pretty peeved that you sent her away from the fight.”

“She couldn’t even put weight on her leg.”

“I know. Peter, could you hand me that tray of tools?”

“Tools?” Tony asked as he looked up at Bruce.

“You need stitches, Tony,” Bruce said as he grabbed the tray from Peter.

“Now?”

“Generally, the sooner the better when it comes to stitches. I’m sorry I have to do it here without anesthetic, but you’ve already lost quite a bit of blood. I could probably wait if we were still in New York, but not today,” Bruce explained as he poured a few pills into his hand before holding them out to Peter. “Peter will give you some painkillers while I go sanitize these tools. I’ll be back in a second.”

As Bruce disappeared, Peter helped Tony take his pills. After swallowing the final one, Tony forced a smile as he looked up at the teenager.

“Hey, Pete? Go make me some coffee, will you?”

“I’ll make you coffee later. You need someone to hold your hand.”

“I’ll be okay, Kid. I think I need coffee more.”

“Tony…”

“To be honest, I’m not even sure how I’m still alive right now. It’s been at least 24 hours since my last cup—“

“Why don’t you go make him coffee, Peter? I don’t think he’ll shut up about it.” Bruce said as he stepped back into the room. The teenager studied Tony for a moment before nodding.

“You’ll call for me if you need me, won’t you?”

“I always do.” That answer satisfied Peter, and he reluctantly left the room.

“Why don’t you want him in here?” Bruce asked as he lifted the blanket away to start stitching up Tony’s thigh. “You loved having him around last time you were hurt.”

“This time I’ve got a migraine, I haven’t had coffee, I ache all over, and you’re about to stitch me up without any kind of anesthetic. I don’t think these painkillers are doing anything, and I don’t have the pain tolerance right now to keep from crying like a baby in front of him.”

“They’re strong, Tony. Just give the pills a few minutes to start working Tony. I promise you probably won’t remember much of this…but it’d still be better if you had someone here with you.”

“I got you, Brucie. Now stitch me up.” The doctor sighed, shaking his head as he pierced Tony’s flesh with the needle.

Tears instantly sprang into Tony’s eyes, and he swallowed thickly as he felt the entire needle being pulled through his skin. He whimpered as Bruce pushed the needle further, and the doctor looked at him with a sigh.

“Tony, I’m calling Peter back.”

“No, I—“

“Let me help.” Bruce and Tony both looked toward the door to see Steve step into the room.

“Cap?” Tony asked as Steve walked in and pulled a stool up beside his cot. Steve reached out to grab Tony’s hand as he looked down at him.

“You want me to talk to you while Bruce does the stitches, or should I shut up?”

“…Talk. Please.” Bruce went back to work, and Tony squeezed Steve’s hand tightly as he felt Bruce add another suture.

“I thought it was odd that Peter left you alone in here. Suppose even when you’re in excruciating pain, you’re still good at hiding it, huh?” Steve asked as he looked down at Tony.

“Normally am. Not today.” Tony spoke in a clipped tone, closing his eyes as a few tears rolled down his cheeks.

“I still can’t believe you took your suit off.”

“Nat needed it more.” Steve glanced at Bruce, and the two men briefly shared a look of mutual admiration for Tony.

“You really won’t let anyone else compete for the title of ‘Earth’s Best Defender’ will you?” Tony simply snorted, though his cool demeanor was tarnished when he choked on a sob a few seconds later.

“I’m sorry, Tony. Only a few more stitches and then we’ll be done with your thigh.”

“It’s fine, Brucie,” Tony said before tightly clenching his jaw as he shuddered to take another breath. Upon feeling something soft touch his forehead, Tony peeked opened his eyes to see Steve dabbing the perspiration off his brow with a soft cloth. At that moment, Tony did not see his teammate nor his contentious friend caring for him, but his childhood hero. Tony burst into tears, and Steve pulled the cloth away as he stared at Tony in surprise.

“Did I hurt you?” When Tony didn’t respond, Steve glanced at Bruce.

“He didn’t sleep well, and he’s had a migraine since he woke up. I doubt being thrown onto concrete and hit with shrapnel did much to help that…hopefully his painkillers are starting to kick in.” Bruce said, not looking up from his work. Steve nodded, his lips drawing into a tight frown as he looked back to Tony.

“Why didn’t you tell me that you had a migraine this morning?” Steve asked.

“What difference would that make?”

“I yelled at you for lying down with your arm over your eyes while we were coming up with our plan of attack.”

“Mhmm.”

“Geez, Tony. It’s no wonder Peter was glaring at me. I’d have glared at me too.” Steve said as he reached up to dab more sweat from Tony’s forehead. Bruce slid the needle through Tony’s skin a final time, and Tony whimpered as Bruce tied off the thread. The Captain watched Bruce for a moment before releasing a sigh of resignation and turning back to Tony. “You know that I care about you. Right?”

Tony opened his eyes to look at Steve, staring at him for a moment before acknowledging the question with an ever-so-slight bob of his head.

“All right, your thigh is done. I’m going to do your shoulder now.” Bruce said as he rolled his stool to the left and pulled the top half of the blanket down to stitch up Tony’s shoulder.

“Okay,” Tony whispered. His breathing momentarily evened out, but when Bruce stuck the needle into his shoulder, the man audibly gasped.

“You’re doing great. It’s almost over.” Steve said encouragingly, and Tony looked up at him with tear-filled eyes before pulling Steve’s hand closer and resting his cheek against it. The captain shifted closer, allowing Tony to keep hold of his hand as he lifted his other hand to run through the man’s hair. The action seemed to calm Tony immensely, and Steve looked over the man’s face with a melancholic smile.

_“He puts on a big show, but he’s as gentle as a lamb.”_ Steve thought as he continued to run his fingers through Tony’s hair. _“Oh…”_ Guilt suddenly overwhelmed the Captain as a thought occurred to him, and he stopped running his hand through Tony’s hair as he bit his bottom lip. _“No wonder Buck’s been spending so much time with him…”_

“Steve.”

“Yeah?” The man asked distractedly as he looked up at Tony.

“Don’t stop.”

“Huh? ...Oh, right.” Steve resumed running his hand through Tony’s hair, still distracted by the realization that Tony’s soft demeanor was exactly what Bucky needed while adjusting to his new life. A moment later, Tony squeezed Steve’s hand so tightly that it caused the captain to grimace, effectively pulling him from his thoughts.

“You’re almost done, Tony. One more stitch.” Bruce said as he tried to work as quickly as possible. Steve glanced at Tony’s shoulder before removing his hand from Tony’s hair and grabbing the cloth he had set on the edge of the bed. When Tony made a noise of protest, Steve looked up at him.

“Hang on.” He said softly as he used the cloth to dry the tears from Tony’s cheeks. After dropping it back to the bed, Steve returned his fingers to Tony’s hair. “Does this help your headache?”

“Yeah.”

“All right, I’ll keep doing it.” As Steve’s fingers continued to caress his scalp, Tony slowly became more relaxed, only wincing slightly as Bruce finished stitching him up.

“All right, you’re all done. You did well. I’m going to clean your other wounds now, but I doubt you’ll feel much for those.” Bruce said as he stood up and set the tools aside.

“Don’t leave,” Tony said as he released Steve’s hand and opened his eyes to look at the man.

“I wasn’t planning to.”

“Okay,” Tony said as Bruce dabbed a wound on his side with antiseptic. “That’s cold!”

“Sorry, Tony. How are you feeling?” Bruce asked as he continued cleaning the wound.

“I’ve been better. I’ve also been worse.”

“Suppose that’s good. Has the pain medication started helping?”

“Guess so. Are you almost done?”

“Are you in a hurry to get somewhere?”

“I need coffee.” Bruce raised an eyebrow at Tony’s response.

“No. What you need to do is relax.”

“I feel very relaxed,” Tony argued. Bruce shook his head as he bandaged the disinfected area before beginning to clean a small cut.

“Yes, but that’s the pills. You need to rest or you’ll feel even worse later.” Tony simply huffed at Bruce’s response as he turned to scowl at Steve.

“Do you hear him?”

“Yes, I do.”

“Aren’t you going to back me up?”

“No, I’m going to back him up. You need to take it easy.”

“Peter would back me up,” Tony mumbled under his breath, and the men on either side of him tried not to laugh.

“I think he would agree with us, Tony,” Steve said with a chuckle.

“No way.”

“How about I go find Peter after I finish cleaning you up, and you can ask him yourself?” Bruce asked.

“Get coffee too.”

“All right, all right.” Bruce finished cleaning up the superficial cuts and minor wounds across Tony’s body before looking up at Steve.

“You happen to have any spare clothing around? His spare set is too tight.”

“What’s wrong with the clothes I’m wearing?”

“Tony, you’re not wearing any; you’re covered with a blanket,” Bruce said as he set down his instruments.

“Who stole my clothes?” Tony side-eyed Steve. “Is that my shirt?”

“Your shirt would be too small for me, Tony.”

“I know. That’s why I think it’s mine.” Bruce snorted, and Steve rolled his eyes.

“The clothes you were wearing are shredded and bloody. You got hit with shrapnel, remember?”

“Oh…yeah.”

“I should have an extra outfit in my locker,” Steve said to Bruce. “I’ll go grab it.”

“No. I think this blanket is really working for me.”

“You need to put some clothes on,” Steve argued.

“I don’t **_need_** to do anything.” The Captain stared at Tony for a moment before looking at Bruce who simply shrugged his shoulders.

“We’re going directly into the tower, so there won’t be any press. Just let him stay wrapped in the blanket ‘til we get back.” Bruce said before glancing back at Tony, who was already trying to get out of bed. “Hold on. You can’t get up until I go get Peter. If he agrees with us, you’re not getting out of that bed until we get back to the tower. Deal?”

“….Uh-huh. Don’t forget coffee.” Tony said with widened eyes, the painkillers clearly having taken over.

“I won’t.” The doctor said as he removed his gloves with an exasperated sigh. He headed out the door after quickly washing his hands, leaving Steve and Tony alone.

“You’re ridiculous, you know that?” Steve asked with a chuckle after Bruce stepped out of the room. Tony stared at Steve, confusion written across his face for several moments before tears sprang into his eyes. Bewildered, Steve leaned forward to gently touch Tony’s arm. “Tony, I didn’t—“

“I’m not ridiculous.”

“I didn’t mean it like—“

“I hate when you’re mad at me.”

“Tony, I haven’t been mad at you. Why would you think I was mad?”

“You said I was disgusting.“

“I never said that. When did I say that?“

“You did, but I’m not disgusting. You don’t understand!”

“What don’t I understand?”

“I wouldn’t ever do anything to hurt him.” Realizing that it was the pain medication talking, Steve just nodded along.

“Right…who are we talking about?”

“Bucky,” Tony said as if the answer were obvious.

“Oh,” Steve said, confused as to why Tony was talking about Bucky, “Well, I believe you.”

“…You don’t hate me anymore?”

“Wha—Tony, why would you think that I hate you?”

“Because I love him.”

“Him? …Wait, **_what_**?  You’re **_in love_** with Bucky?” Steve’s strong reaction caused a fearful expression to cross Tony’s face, and the captain attempted to soften his expression as he stepped closer.

“I don’t trick him into spending time with me. I won’t touch him as much.”

“Uh…okay,” Steve said as he reached out to gently stroke Tony’s arm. Tony stared down at Steve’s hand with a perplexed expression before looking back up at the man. “When did you fall in love with him?” Steve asked, wondering if Tony was spewing painkiller-induced nonsense or if the man actually had feelings for his friend.

“I don’t know…maybe the day we went to the amusement park.” Steve had half-expected a bizarre story that would prove Tony had no idea what he was saying, but upon hearing the man’s answer, he stopped stroking Tony’s arm as he thought back to how much time the two had been spending together.

“Does Bucky know?” Tony pondered the question for a moment before he tilted his head and looked up at Steve.

“Does Bucky still live with us?”

“Of course he does.”

“Then I think he doesn’t know.”

“I see...”

“You’re not mad?”

“No. Uh, just surprised.” Tony leaned to the side, his cheek pressing against Steve’s abdomen as he wrapped his arms around the man’s waist.

“Good. I hate fighting with you.” Steve’s eyebrows shot up as he looked down. After a brief moment of hesitation, he reached down to pet Tony’s hair.

“I don’t much care for it myself.” Steve allowed Tony to cling to him as he got lost in his thoughts. When the door opened a few minutes later, Tony turned his head to look at the door, though he made no attempt to detach himself from Steve.

“Spiderbaby!” The exclamation drew Steve out of his thoughts as both he and Bruce chuckled.

“Dr. Banner said that you’re loopy, but that’s no excuse to call me that,” Peter said as he approached Tony’s bed.

“I missed you.”

“You’re the one that made me leave!”

“Oh,” Tony said as he looked at the cup in Peter’s hand, “Is that my coffee?”

“Yeah.” Tony made a groan of discomfort as he moved his right arm, and the stitches on his shoulder tightened.

“Peter, would you hold it? I want to put his arm in a sling until I can trust him not to move it.” Bruce said as he opened up a drawer and shuffled through its contents.  

“Sure,” Peter said as he held the coffee up to Tony’s lips. Tony took several sips and sighed in satisfaction when Peter lowered the mug.

“I’m a new man.”

“You’re a dramatic man.” Peter pointed out. Tony side-eyed the teenager and continued to do so as Bruce pried Tony off of Steve and placed the sling on his arm. Peter laughed, getting louder the longer Tony continued to stare. Finally, Tony broke out into a huge grin as Bruce pulled away.

“We should be back in the tower within 30 minutes. Do you need anything else to make you more comfortable until then?” Bruce asked as he lightly rubbed Tony’s back.

“Yes.”

“…And that would be?”

“Spiderbaby snuggles.”

“Think that’s your department, Kid,” Bruce said as he clapped Peter on the shoulder.

“You’re so embarrassing.” Peter groaned as he started to climb into bed with Tony.

“Hold up. Go ‘round to his left side. Most of his damage is over here.” Peter nodded and went around to the other side of the bed, slipping past Steve as he climbed onto the bed and cuddled up to Tony. As Steve stepped back to make room for Peter, Tony looked up at Steve with a worried expression.

“Are you leaving?”

“ I’m just moving so that Peter can get on the bed.”

“Oh, okay.”

“Can I talk to Tony now?” Natasha asked as she poked her head in the door.

“Nat!” Tony exclaimed upon seeing the woman in the doorway. Natasha narrowed her eyes as she pushed open the door and swung in on a pair of crutches.

“We need to talk, Mister. Because if you think—“

“Save it, Nat,” Bruce said with an amused smile. “I doubt he’ll remember much for the rest of the day.” Natasha looked to see Tony wearing a goofy grin, and she rolled her eyes, a soft laugh escaping her lips as she finished making her way to the bed.

“I’m mad at you.”

“What? Why?” Tony asked as he pouted.

“Oh no, I want you to remember this conversation. We’ll talk tomorrow.”

“Then that means you’re not mad until then?”

“…Fine.” Natasha said with a small smile. Tony grimaced as he rolled away from Peter, reaching his free arm out to try and hug Natasha. As Peter was partially lying on top of the blanket Tony was wrapped in, Natasha quickly realized that Tony was not wearing any clothing. The woman reached out and gently placed her hand on his chest to keep him from exposing himself before she looked up at Steve.

“Why isn’t he wearing anything?”

“He wanted to be naked,” Steve replied.

“You didn’t want to wrestle him into clothing?” Natasha narrowed her eyes as the corners of her lips twitched upward.

“Come on, Nat. We’re going to be home in about fifteen minutes anyway.”

“You can’t just let him walk around naked, Steve.”

“Bruce was the one who told me not to fight him on it!”

“Really?” Natasha asked as she turned to Bruce.

“Come on, Nat. I’ve met doctors who are better patients than Tony. As long as he’s behaving, I don’t care what he is or isn’t wearing.”

As the trio discussed Tony’s lack of clothing, Peter scooted closer to the man and wrapped him up in the blanket, effectively swaddling him so that he could not move his arms. Tony didn’t even notice, as he stared awestruck at Natasha. Upon noticing Tony’s expression, Peter raised an eyebrow and tilted his head to the side.

“Whatcha looking at?”

“Shh…he might run away,” Tony said in a whisper.

“Who might run away?”

“Pikachu. Look. He’s on Nat’s shoulder.” Peter blinked rapidly before biting back a laugh.

_“He’s hallucinating,”_ Peter thought as he bit back a laugh. He carefully leaned over Tony, a devious grin on his face as he flicked the air over Natasha’s shoulder, looking back to see Tony’s expression transform into one of pure horror. Steve, Natasha, and Bruce stared at Peter as if he had lost his mind until Tony cried out in horror a split-second later.

“NO!”

“Tony, what’s wrong?” Steve ran around to the other side of the bed, though he stopped in his tracks when Tony began to yell.

“CAP, YOU STEPPED ON HIM!” The concern on the trio’s faces shifted to confusion, and Peter collapsed backward onto the bed, laughing uproariously.

“Peter, do you know what he’s talking about?” Steve asked, and Peter nodded.

“He’s hallucinating Pikachu.” Peter managed to say between laughs.

“I think you killed him…” Tony said as tears welled up in his eyes.

“Oh my gosh.” Steve moaned as he rubbed a hand down his face. Natasha began to giggle, and Peter gasped.

“Cap! I can’t believe you killed Pikachu!”

“I didn’t kill anything!”

“You’re the one that flicked him off Nat’s shoulder!” Tony said as he scowled at Peter.

“Tony, I was only playing with Pikachu! I wouldn’t really hurt him.”

“Oh…okay.”

“What? You forgive Peter just like that, but I’m a murderer?” Steve asked incredulously.

“He said they were playing.“

“Why do you believe Peter and not me?” Looking momentarily confused by the question, Tony frowned in thought, so Peter took it upon himself to answer.

“Because I’m his Spiderbaby.”

“Oh yes. That’s why.” Tony said with a serious nod. Steve scoffed and Natasha sat at the foot of Tony’s bed, doubled over in laughter.

“Steve. Please remember that you’re fighting over Tony’s hallucination of a cartoon character.” Bruce said with a laugh. Steve coughed and glanced away in embarrassment.

“Where did my arms go?” Tony asked as he looked down. Peter shifted closer to Tony and lay his head on the man’s shoulder.

“I put them inside the blanket.”

“I can’t move them.”

“I know. You better not try it either.”

“…Fine.” Tony said as he lay his head against the pillows in resignation. The three adults gaped at Peter as he smirked back at them.

“I know a Spider gave you your superpowers, but where did you pick up the superpower of handling Tony Stark?” Bruce asked curiously.

“From Miss Potts.”

“Ah. That explains everything.” Natasha said as Bruce and Steve nodded thoughtfully beside her. At that moment, the door swung open, and Loki entered the room.

“I came to bring Peter his phone. It keeps going off, and it is terribly irritating... Nobody told me we could see Anthony.” He said in annoyance as he brushed past Steve and sat on the edge of the bed beside Tony. After handing Peter his phone, Loki reached up to touch Tony’s cheek.

“How are you feeling, Anthony?”

“Dizzy. Sleepy.”

“I am sure you are. Would you like me to help you sleep?”

“I don’t want to sleep.” Loki gave Tony a perplexed look as he moved his hand away from Tony’s forehead.

“You just said that you were sleepy.”

“Yes, but I can’t sleep yet.”

“Why not?”

“I need to sleep with B—“

“Bear!” Peter exclaimed suddenly; Tony nodded as he thought of his “Bucky Bear”.

“Yeah.”

“You still sleep with a stuffed companion, Anthony? That is rather adorable.” Loki said as he ran his thumb over Tony’s cheek. Peter’s phone alerted him to a text message, and the boy looked down at his phone. He scanned a few messages, his eyes widening as he looked up Steve.

“Uh-oh. We’re in trouble.”

“We are?” Steve asked in surprise.

“Yeah,” Peter said with a sigh as he started typing a message on his phone. “Guess Bucky saw Tony get hurt on the news. He’s been texting us for almost two hours.” Peter said as he looked up at Steve, who pulled his phone out of his pocket.

“Oh…it’s on silent.” The captain said as he began to read through the messages. “Oh, he’s mad.”

“Yeah.”

“Bucky?” Tony asked Peter. A smile lit up his face before he glanced at Steve and looked away somberly. Steve frowned when he saw that; though no one else seemed to notice.

“Yeah, he’s worried sick about you.”

“Where is he?”

“He’s at the tower. We’ll be there soon.” Peter said. Tony closed his eyes and nuzzled into Loki’s soothing touch, wanting nothing more than a hug from Bucky.  

* * *

 

**Peter:** Sorry. :( Tony is hurt, but he’s okay. We’ve been busy taking care of him. He’s being really funny. You’ll see soon.

The moment Bucky received the message, he fell back against the couch and breathed a sigh of relief. For the last two hours, he had paced around the apartment with an upset stomach, texting Steve and Peter every ten minutes to ask about Tony.

_“He’s okay. He’s okay. Thank goodness that he—“_ Bucky’s phone went off again, and he looked down to see a message from Steve.

**Steve:**  Sorry, Buck. Peter told me you text us. Tony is ok. We will be home in 10.

Upon reading Steve’s message, Bucky hopped to his feet and ran to the elevator.

“Miss Friday, please take me to the helipad.”

“Right away, Sergeant.” Bucky chewed on his bottom lip as he rode up to the helipad before running outside and watching for any sign of the anticipated aircraft. It was almost exactly ten minutes later when Bucky spotted the aircraft in the sky. He moved off to the side of the tower, waiting impatiently for the aircraft to land. It seemed to take forever for the vessel to touchdown, but when it finally did, Bucky was beside the door before it even opened. The moment that Steve emerged with Tony in his arms, Bucky practically leaped at them, all anger toward Steve and Peter forgotten.

“I don’t have a broken leg! Carry Nat!” Tony protested as he squirmed in Steve’s grasp.

“You could only take three steps before falling over. Besides, Bruce doesn’t want the stitches on your thigh to—“

“Tony?” Bucky reached out to touch the man, though quickly pulled his hand back as he was unsure of the severity of Tony’s injuries.

“Bucky?” Tony’s eyes lit up as he turned his head to look into Bucky’s worried eyes. Tony tried to reach out, forgetting that his arms were still wrapped up in the blanket.

“I don’t want to drop you. You gotta stop moving, Tony.” Steve said as he tightened his grip on the man.

“Steve, is he okay?”

“He will be, Buck.”

“I won’t be okay until I get my arms back.” Steve rolled his eyes as he started carrying Tony toward the elevator, and Bucky walked alongside Steve.

“You have your arms, Tony. They’re inside the blanket.”

“What?” Tony gasped. “How dare you restrain me!”

“Hey, I didn’t do it. Peter did.”

“Oh.” Tony lay his head against Steve’s shoulder and Bucky stared at Tony.

“What’s wrong with him?”

“He’s on painkillers,” Peter said with a laugh as he walked up behind the men. “I told you he was being funny.” Bucky nodded distractedly before turning to look at the others walking behind them.

“Why is Natasha on crutches?”

“Her leg is broken.” Bucky glanced at Tony, but seeing that the man was clearly out of it, he turned and went back toward Natasha.

“Broken leg, Doll? Are you okay otherwise?”

“I’m fine,” Natasha said with a smile. 

“Want me to carry you?” Sam walked up behind Natasha with a horrified look on his face, but Natasha simply laughed softly.

“I’m fine, Bucky. Thank you for offering.”

“That’s it?” Sam asked. “If Steve or I had offered to carry you, you would have decked us with your crutches.”

“Bucky didn’t ask to be patronizing,” Natasha responded. Sam and Natasha began to lightly banter as they stepped into the elevator, and Bucky slipped to the opposite side to stand beside Steve.

“Stevie, I don’t want to go out dancing anymore.”

“I think that’s a good idea. We can go another night.” Steve said as he looked down at Tony, who was staring blankly at the wall of the lift. “I can put Tony to bed and then we can go to the lounge and—“

“Bed?” Tony snapped his head up, knocking into Steve’s jaw.

“Ow…yes, bed,” Steve said as he tilted his head away from Tony.

“No thanks.”

“You said you were tired but couldn’t sleep without your bear. Well, we’re back at the tower now.”

“What bear?” Bucky asked in confusion. When Bucky felt Peter jab him in the back, it only took the man a moment to realize that Peter must have helped cover up for Tony’s drug-induced ramblings. “I mean…if Tony doesn’t want to sleep, let’s keep him company for a while.”

“Yes! That’s a great idea.” Peter agreed.

“I would also like to spend more time with Anthony,” Loki said.

“As would I. I think Tony will feel better if he can relax around his friends,” Thor said in agreement.

“Tony, do you want us to go to your apartment with you, or do you want to sleep?” Steve asked as he looked down at the man in his arms.

“Come with.”

“Bruce?” Steve asked as he glanced at the doctor.

“As long as he’s resting. Friday, could you stop at Med bay before going to Tony’s floor?”

“Yes, Dr. Banner.”

“Nat, we can get you a walking boot before we go upstairs.”

“Sounds great.” A moment later, the doors opened, and the pair exited the elevator before it took the rest of the group to Tony’s floor. When the doors opened again and everyone began to file out, Steve made a beeline through the living room and toward the bedrooms.

“I’ll get some clothes on him. Peter, you got any idea where Tony keeps his pajamas?”

“Yeah, I’ll help you.”

“I can help too,” Bucky said as he began to follow Steve.

“It’s all right, Buck. Peter knows where everything is. Why don’t you guys decide what we should order for dinner?” Bucky sighed as he watched Steve and Peter walk away before he plopped down onto the couch in agitation.

Peter opened the door to the bedroom, though after taking a brief look at the state of things, he slammed the door shut and whirled around to look at Steve.

“What are you doing?” The Captain asked as he raised an eyebrow.

“Uh…I just remembered that Tony’s bear is in my room. Yeah, I had a bad dream last night so Tony gave him to me. You should go get him from my room while I get Tony’s pajamas.”

“All right…” Steve said, giving Peter an odd look before he turned around to go into the teenager’s room. Peter quickly entered Tony’s room and ran toward the bed. He kicked Bucky’s slippers beneath it before stuffing Bucky’s pajamas under some pillows. He grabbed one of Bucky’s moon-shaped pillows, that had somehow made it to Tony’s room, and stuffed it under the bed beside Bucky’s slippers. After briefly looking around for anything he had missed, Peter opened the nightstand and slid Bucky’s wallet and spare change inside the drawer before slamming it shut. When he heard Steve walking back down the hallway, the teenager dove into Tony’s closet to find a pair of pajamas.

“Peter?” Steve called out as he entered the room. “I can’t find it.”

“Oh? That’s weird.”  Peter said as he strolled out of the closet with a pair of red flannel pajamas in hand. Steve set Tony down on the bed and unwrapped his blanket. The moment that Steve freed Tony from his blanket cocoon, the zoned-out man bolted upright.

“I’m free!”

“Yeah, you are,” Steve said with a chuckle. “Let’s get your pajamas on and then we’ll go back to the other room, huh?”

“I don’t need pajamas.”

“If you don’t put on clothes, then we’ll all go back downstairs,” Steve said as he grabbed the pajamas from Peter.

“Bucky too?” Peter had to physically restrain himself from face-palming, but when he looked at Steve to gauge the man’s reaction, he was surprised to see that Steve’s expression had softened.

“Yes. Bucky too.”

“…Guess I’m kinda cold.”

“That’s what I thought.” The captain said as he began helping Tony change into his pajamas. Peter stepped in to keep Tony’s arm still as the sling was removed, and once Steve had Tony’s shirt buttoned up, he re-fastened the sling around his arm. Tony reached up to hook his free arm around Steve’s neck, and the Captain lifted him with ease.

“Not fighting it anymore, huh?”

“No. Carrying me can be your penance for killing Pikachu.” Peter burst into laughter as he opened the door for Steve, who rolled his eyes as he stepped into the hallway.

“For the last time, Tony. I didn’t kill Pikachu.”

“Liar. I saw it with my own two eyes. There were other witnesses who saw him too. Right, Spidey?” Tony asked as he peered over Steve’s shoulder.

“Yep. I totally saw him.”

“Peter!” Steve reprimanded, but the teenager just looked at the captain with a mischievous grin. “Peter’s playing with you. You didn’t see him, and I didn’t kill him because he wasn’t there.” Steve said as he stepped into the living room.

“You didn’t kill who?” Bucky asked when the trio entered the room.

“Pikachu.”

“That little Pokémon dude?” Sam asked as he raised an eyebrow.

“Tony hallucinated him.”

“Stop saying that!” Tony said as he poked Steve’s chest. “I know what I saw. He was dancing on Natasha’s shoulder and then Peter flicked him off her shoulder onto the floor. Then he stood up, you stepped on him, and he died.”

“Can I have some of whatever he’s on?” Sam asked, prompting Peter to smack the man in the back of the head with a pillow.

“How about you go sit with Bucky and stop harassing me about Pikachu,” Steve said as he set Tony down on the couch beside his friend. At first, Tony seemed reluctant to detach himself from Steve. However, the moment he realized he was beside Bucky, he rapidly turned to cling to the man. Tony winced as he put pressure on his stitched-up areas, and Steve sighed as he plopped down beside Sam.

“He’s injured all over, but be especially careful with his right shoulder and thigh. Those areas are stitched up.”

“Yeah?” Bucky looked at the pained expression on Tony’s face before grabbing a pillow and putting it on his lap. “Tony, why don’t you lie down?” Tony squinted up at Bucky as a gasp escaped his lips.

“Where did your hair go?”

“I cut it off the other day. Remember?” Bucky asked, unsure whether to be amused or worried by the question.

“Oh yeah… handsome.” Tony mumbled.

“Thanks, Doll,” Bucky said with a chuckle as he maneuvered Tony’s head onto the pillow in his lap. Peter lifted Tony’s legs and slid onto the couch before dropping the man’s feet in his lap.

“Hi, Spiderbaby,” Tony said. Sam snorted, and Peter turned to glare at the man.

“Don’t you even think about calling me that,” Sam smirked, and Steve interrupted before any bickering could occur.

“Did you guys decide on dinner yet?” As the others began to discuss what they would order, Bucky looked down at Tony and ran his fingers through his friend’s hair. Tony looked up at him and smiled before turning onto his side in an attempt to snuggle against Bucky.

“Stay on your back,” Bucky said as he gingerly rolled Tony back over. He grabbed a blanket and spread it over Tony before gently resting his metal hand atop Tony’s chest to keep him from moving. Using his other hand, Bucky resumed stroking Tony’s hair, and the man’s eyes fell shut. Bucky stared tenderly down at him, not even realizing when Natasha and Bruce joined everyone on Tony’s floor.

“Buck?”

“Huh?”

“What do you want?”

“What are we ordering?”

“Chinese.”

“Uh…I liked what you ordered me last time.”

“All right. Is Tony still awake?”

“No,” Tony said, and Bucky chuckled as he looked down at the man lying on his lap.

“Tony, what do you want?” Steve asked.

“Nothing.”

“Fine. I’m ordering your usual.” Tony grumbled as he once again tried to roll onto his side, though Bucky stopped him from rolling over. Irritated, Tony sat up, wincing as he threw the pillow off Bucky’s lap. He then proceeded to climb up onto the man’s lap and bury his face in Bucky’s neck.

“Tony?” Bucky frowned as he wrapped his arms around the man, and Tony whispered against his neck.

“My head…”

“You have a headache?”

“The painkillers are probably starting to wear off a bit. I thought he’d be asleep by now.” Bruce said. “Tony, why don’t you go lie down? We can bring you dinner later.”

“It’s just a headache,” Tony mumbled stubbornly.

Loki stared at Tony for a moment before standing up from his seat. He moved to kneel beside the sofa Bucky was on and reached out to touch Tony’s forehead. Bucky scowled, immediately pushing the god’s hand away, but Loki gave Bucky an unamused glare as he pushed his hand forward once again.

“I will not harm him,” Loki said as he lay his hand on Tony’s forehead; Tony sighed happily and pressed his head closer into Loki’s touch.

“Does that feel nice, Anthony?”

“Yeah.”

“Are you using magic?” Bucky asked, and Loki looked unamused as he removed his hand from Tony’s forehead and touched Bucky’s cheek with his icy fingers. Bucky jumped, causing Tony to whine in protest.

“I am a frost giant,” Loki said with a smirk as he returned his hand to Tony’s forehead. “Come sit with me for a few minutes, Anthony.” The god said, and Tony didn’t hesitate to turn into his arms. Carefully, Loki picked Tony up before returning to his seat beside Thor, and he cradled Tony as he kept his cool hand over the man’s forehead and eyes. Bucky frowned, but when he saw that Tony seemed more comfortable, he decided not to say anything.

While waiting for dinner to arrive, Bucky unwittingly ended up glaring at the god comforting Tony. When Loki noticed the man’s apparent jealousy, the mischievous god decided that a bit of fun was to be had at Bucky’s expense.

“Anthony Darling, is your head feeling any better?” Loki asked as he removed his hand from Tony’s eyes and began to stroke through his hair.

“Little bit.”

“Good.” Loki cooed as he stroked Tony’s cheek with his free hand. Tony groggily nuzzled into the touch, and Loki smirked when he noticed Bucky fuming out of the corner of his eye. “Thor, I’m realizing now that he seems a bit warm,” Loki said as he turned to his brother.

“Is that so?” Thor asked, casting a worried glance down at Tony.

“Yes…why don’t you check if he has a fever? Your body temperature is far more similar to a human’s than mine is.” Thor started to stick his hand out, but Loki clicked his tongue. “I have heard of human mothers kissing their child’s forehead. Perhaps that is the most accurate way to go about checking?”

“All right,” Thor said, leaning without hesitation to kiss Tony’s forehead. Tony opened his eyes halfway, and Thor chuckled as he noticed the man’s cheeks flush. “He doesn’t feel hot to me.”

“Oh, really?” Loki asked, smiling in amusement as Bucky seethed. “I suppose it’s just because I’m so cold.”

“Kiss me too,” Tony said as he looked up at Loki. The god chuckled, partially endeared by how affectionate Tony was when painkillers dulled his inhibitions, and partially amused by how easy it was to make Bucky green with envy.

“Your wish is my command,” Loki said as he leaned forward to press his lips to Tony’s forehead. By this point, Bucky was so clearly fuming that even Peter had noticed. The teenager instantly perked up as he wondered if Bucky might have developed feelings for Tony.

“You keep drifting in and out. Will you go lay in your bed if Loki goes with you?” Peter asked as he moved to crouch beside Tony.

“You too?”

“Yeah, I’ll come too.”

“Mm…but kisses.”

“Kisses?”

“Collecting 'em,” Tony mumbled, clearly becoming groggier by the minute.

“Is that good?” Peter asked after pressing a kiss to Tony’s cheek. The man nodded before squinting past Peter. “Sam and Natasha.”

“What is he saying about me?” Sam asked as he heard his name being said.

“He wants kisses from you and Natasha,” Peter said with a grin.

“Oh, all right,” Natasha said as she stood up and walked across the room, bending over to kiss Tony on the nose. The man giggled, and Natasha smiled. “Laugh now, Tony. Don’t forget that I’m lecturing you tomorrow.”

“Your turn Sam,” Peter said as he began to snicker.

“Hell no.”

“Come on, he won’t go to bed until you kiss him.”

“You kiss him.” Sam argued, “He won’t even know the difference.”

“Sam, just kiss him so he’ll go to bed,” Steve said, unable to hide his amusement.

“…Fine. But he’s getting so much shit for this tomorrow.” Sam said as he reluctantly stood up and walked over, leaning down to peck Tony on the cheek. Almost everyone in the room began to laugh as Sam made a fuss about having to kiss Tony; everyone that is, except for Bucky.

“Come on, Little One,” Loki said to Peter as he stood up with Tony cradled in his arms. Peter followed, glancing over his shoulder to catch sight of Bucky sulking. The moment they entered Tony’s bedroom, Peter shut the door and turned to Loki.

“Did I imagine that?”

“You did not,” Loki said with a pleased smile as he gently lay Tony onto the bed.

“He was so jealous, wasn’t he?”

“Extremely.”

“Hmm?” Tony asked in confusion as Peter curled up beside him.

“Nothing, Tony,” Peter said before kissing his cheek. “Go to sleep.”

“Mhmm,” Tony mumbled, closing his eyes as Loki sat down beside him and pressed cool fingers to his temple. Within moments of retiring to the quiet of his bedroom, Tony fell fast asleep. Once they were sure he had dozed off, Loki and Peter began to talk in hushed tones. They spoke together for nearly thirty minutes before Tony’s door swung open and Bucky stepped inside.

“Food’s here. I’ll stay with Tony while you eat.” Loki and Peter exchanged glances before Loki shook his head.

“That’s quite alright, Sergeant. Feel free to enjoy your dinner.”

“I ate not long before you got home. You’re probably hungrier.” A devilish glint twinkled in Loki’s eye, but Peter spoke before the god had a chance to respond.

“Let’s go.” Loki hesitated at Peter’s suggestion but decided not to argue as he slowly removed his arm from beneath Tony’s neck and rose to his feet. As the pair exited the room, Bucky brushed straight past Loki as he moved to sit on the edge of Tony’s bed.  

“You’re not going to ruin all my hard work.” Peter hissed to Loki as he quietly shut the door behind them.

Once Loki and Peter had left, Bucky slid to lie beside the injured man. He reached out to pet Tony, gazing tenderly over the man’s battered face. His eyes trailed down Tony’s neck, and Bucky reached out to curiously undo the top few buttons of his shirt. Upon seeing the dark bruises and scratches covering Tony’s body, a surge of overprotectiveness prompted Bucky to pull Tony closer to his chest. Just as Bucky began to refasten Tony’s shirt, the injured man’s eyes flew open.

“Loki?” Tony asked as he craned his neck to look beside him.

“He’s eatin’ dinner.” Tony’s body tensed as his head snapped to the side, but when he found himself face-to-face with Bucky, he promptly melted into the man’s arms.

“Bucky,” Tony said as a broad smile spread across his face.

“Hi, Doll. How’re you feeling?”

“Mm.”

“Is that good or bad?” Bucky asked as he brushed his thumb over Tony’s cheek, “I don’t think you ate a thing all day, did you? I can bring your dinner in here for you.”

“No.”

“Do you want anything?”

“Kiss?”

“You sure are cute when you don’t feel well, aren’t ya?”  Tony squinted his eyes as if trying to decipher what Bucky had just said, and Bucky chuckled softly as he pressed a kiss to Tony’s forehead. Satisfied, Tony closed his eyes before almost immediately drifting back to sleep. Bucky sighed, a soft smile gracing his lips as he went back to stroking Tony’s hair.

_“I’m so glad you’re okay.”_

* * *

 

“Hey, Buck?” Steve whispered as he peeked his head into Tony’s room. “Bucky?” Entering the now-darkened room, Steve chuckled when he realized that Bucky had fallen asleep beside Tony. He reached out to shake his friend awake before glancing at the man sleeping beside him. Remembering what Tony had unwittingly confessed to him earlier that day, Steve hesitated as he noticed the way Tony was gripping Bucky’s shirt as he slept.

_“Poor Tony…”_

“Cap?” Steve turned around, smiling at the teenager standing behind him.

“Bucky fell asleep. I was just trying to decide if I should wake him up or let him sleep here.”

“Oh, I think Tony wouldn’t mind if he slept here just this once.”

“You’re probably right. Did you ever find his bear?”

“Huh? Oh, uh, no…but I’ll find it tomorrow. I don’t think he’ll need it tonight.”

“I suppose not,” Steve said as he reached out to put his hand on Peter’s shoulder. When the teenager did not shrug away but instead smiled up at him, the captain breathed an internal sigh of relief.

“If you’re not too tired, would you want to show me how to play one of your video games?”

“Yeah. Hawkeye’s coming back soon, so I think you’ll need some practice.”

“I think you’re right,” Steve said with a soft chuckle. “Why don’t you get it started?”

“Will do.” As Peter crept out of the room, Steve turned back to pick up a blanket from the foot of the bed. He spread it over Bucky before stepping back to look down at his two sleeping friends.

“Sweet dreams,” Steve said before walking out to the hallway. The captain smiled to himself as he glanced back at the sleeping men, quietly pulling the door closed as he left Tony’s room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was supposed to be posted two days ago. However, when I was editing it, I received a phone call from the police. My dad was found unresponsive on the train on his way home from work. I went to my mom's work, got her, and called my brother to have him drive up, and we've been in the hospital ever since. My dad's still in the ICU and we are unsure of what will happen. The doctors are "cautiously optimistic" because he is doing better than they anticipated, so that's great news. On top of that, I had an interview today that I was able to reschedule for tomorrow, and I have another interview on Monday. 
> 
> All that being said, I have no idea when I will update again. Losing myself in my story is really helping me cope, but I also don't have much time now. If you are someone who prays, please send up a prayer for my dad. I'm still in denial over the death of Tony Stark, so if I lost my dad I really don't know what I would do.


End file.
